


Everything Back to You

by Takada_Saiko



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, F/M, FBI Agent Jacob, Gen, Spy Liz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-05-01 08:38:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 63
Words: 233,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5199377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Takada_Saiko/pseuds/Takada_Saiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Tom and Liz's paths had been different? If Sam had never taken Liz in or if young Jacob Phelps had been adopted by a nice family and had never met the Major? What if she were the undercover operative and he was the FBI agent that she married 'for her job? And the real question: how does Raymond Reddington fit into all of this? AU. Keen2. Full cast.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

Boots hit hard against the pavement as he rounded the corner, nearly losing his balance at the speed in which he took it. He compensated, though, and made it, a bullet ricocheting far too close for his liking. He ducked down, adjusting his grip on his own gun and picking up the speed. They were going to lose him. If they lost him, they were back to square one, and that was something that he couldn't do. It had been over a month since any of them had seen home, following one lead after another, and all he wanted to do was to go home and-

He slammed to a stop, the figure at the end of the alley catching him by surprise. He couldn't see his face, and he barely registered as he turned, gun raised, and a shot went off. He didn't feel the first one, not really, but he stumbled back as a numbness spread. It was the second and the third that told him without a doubt that the gunman hadn't missed his target.

The pain hit hard, ripping his breath from him and he found himself on his back staring up at the sky. It was blue and he his mind wandered to a set of eyes a similar colour. They were wide and beautiful, belonging to a woman that he'd promised to come home to as soon as the assignment wrapped up. They had even talked about him taking an extended leave from the task force so that he could spend more time with her, but she had said she couldn't make him choose between his work and her. She would be there when he got home as long as he always promised to always come back to her. He did. He had. He had meant to.

"Easy, easy," a voice said and Jacob Phelps blinked rapidly, trying to clear his vision. Liz wasn't there with him. He wasn't home and with a sinking feeling he knew that there was a chance he never would be now. "Easy, Jake," the same voice said and he felt pressure against the injuries.

"Didn't see him," Jacob managed, tasting blood in the back of his throat as he choked the words out. "Don't know how."

"No one saw him."

"Should have-" The sentence was lost as a pained sound escaped him and the hand around his shoulders tightened.

"Jacob?"

He blinked hard, or tried, but it didn't do any good. The voice hadn't belonged to the figure stooped over him, trying to keep him from bleeding out in some foreign alleyway. He must have been closer to unconsciousness than he'd thought.

"Jacob, babe? You need to wake up. Open your eyes. Hey?"

Jacob blinked hard and the alley was replaced by a shadow-filled bedroom and the voice had, just as he'd thought, belonged to the woman whose eyes had been the only things he'd wanted to see as he had laid dying. He found those same eyes looking worriedly at him now, and her name tumbled from his lips, his voice rougher than he would have liked. "Liz?"

"Hey," she greeted, the worry easing just a little and she smiled at him. "You were having a nightmare. I couldn't get you to wake up."

He pulled in a deep breath and loosed it a half a beat later, slow and steady. He was home. The woman that sat in the bed next to him was not just the one he loved, but the one that had married him. It had been nearly three years since he'd been laid out in that alleyway and less since he had watched her walk down the aisle towards him. It was more than he'd ever expected in life, and certainly more than someone like him deserved. Driven and focused, it had been a wakeup call to figure out what was really important in life. He hadn't thought that marriage and family was something that he would ever want for himself, but Liz had changed that, and continued to change him bit by bit every day. She made him feel things that he had been about sure that he was incapable of feeling, and he loved her more than he thought he could.

"Babe?" Liz called gently, leaning forward and stealing a quick kiss from him.

He found himself following her, not wanting it to end. "I'm okay," he murmured hoarsely. "Really."

"You want to talk about it?"

He shrugged, finally settling back against his pillows again and sighing. "Just Vienna."

Liz winced. "Definitely not on the list of places you ever want to go back to, huh?"

"No, I think we can leave that one off." His lips perked just a little at the corners and he reached forward, pulling his wife closer to him. She leaned in willingly and Jacob wrapped an arm around her as she sank into the kiss and it helped to wash away the last remnants of the nightmare-memory. He felt one of her hands snake back around to the back of his neck and he sat up just enough to roll, pulling a giggle out of her.

"Don't you have to give that lecture at Quantico today?" she asked as he kissed her.

"Yeah, it's all week," he managed, barely distracted by the question.

"You're going to be late."

"Hmm?"

His wife laughed as he kissed her and she didn't remind him again. Instead she tightened her hold on him and was halfway to tugging his t-shirt off when his cell started buzzing by the bedside. Jacob let out an exaggerated groan as he flopped over, glaring at it. Finally he grabbed it and tapped the accept button. "Phelps."

" _You're in town, aren't you_?" came the familiar voice from the other end.

"Good morning to you too, buddy" Jacob greeted sarcastically. "Yeah, but I'm about to head out to Stafford. I have a lecture I'm teaching all week at the academy."

"Who is it?" Liz whispered.

_Don Ressler_ , Jacob mouthed and his wife beamed.

"Hi, Don," she called cheerfully and Jacob rolled his eyes. "You still owe us a dinner from the last time you canceled!"

"He says he knows," Jacob answered for the man on the other end of the line. "And he says hi."

She grinned and Jacob's gaze followed her as she slipped out of bed, a tired Hudson yawning at her feet and his tail hitting the hardwood floor happily as she scratched him between the floppy ears.

" _You need to cancel the lecture. I'm sending a detail to pick you up_."

Ressler's words caught him off guard and Jacob blinked hard. "What?"

" _Can you be ready to leave in about fifteen minutes?_ "

"What the hell is going on?" he demanded, throwing the covers back and swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

" _I'll tell you when you get here. Call and cancel the lecture. Trust me. You won't be sorry._ "

The other end of the line went dead and Jacob loosed a long breath.

"What's Don have to say?" Liz asked around her toothbrush.

"I'm getting called in on something. I have no idea what."

She disappeared long enough to rinse her mouth out and come back. "Please tell me he's not pulling you back into the Reddington thing. We've been down that path, and that's what landed you on recovery for _months_."

"Yeah, well aware. Lived it," he reminded her with a quirked eyebrow and moved to the closet to find something more appropriate for meeting with the kinds of people that Ressler worked with these days. Quantico days were supposed to be his more casual days.

She wrapped her arms around his middle and pressed her cheek against his back. "Babe," she said softly and he felt his chest tighten.

"I'm not going back into the field," he promised softly. "Whatever it is, I told you I wouldn't."

"Thank you," she breathed and pressed a kiss to his back. "I love you."

He turned around in her arms, the smile he wore small but real. "Love you, too babe."

* * *

Donald Ressler had been lead agent on the Raymond Reddington case for years. Whenever anyone needed something on it, he was the man they came to. He'd earned every ounce of respect that he had in his position, and when he was the one that needed something, often all he had to do was call in the request. There were times, though, that even that didn't cut it. He had halfway hoped that Assistant Director Harold Cooper would simply check off on the names that he gave him to call in on the case, but he wanted detailed information before allowing any of them into the war room. The one he'd paused at, of course, had been Jacob Phelps.

The older man's dark eyes skimmed the paperwork and Ressler knew what he was looking at by the expression shifting his features ever so slightly. "Sir, if I may, I've worked with Phelps. I know that there may be some things in his record that might cause you to pause, but I can vouch-"

"You were in Quantico with him?" Cooper asked, cutting him off.

"Yes sir."

"Friends?"

"By the end of it," he said carefully. Their rocky start had landed Jacob with a broken nose, Ressler with a fractured wrist, and both of them hating each other for the first several months of their dorm experience. Somehow, though - and there were times even then when Ressler couldn't quite trace the events perfectly - they had won each other's respect and Ressler had become one of the very few friends that Jacob bothered with. In many ways the two men were polar opposites in their approach to cases and their general approach to life, but it had worked well. When they allowed it, they balanced each other nicely.

"It says in his file that he was medically discharged from active field duty."

"This isn't field duty, sir. It's just a consultation. There are few men in the FBI with his knowledge on the subject."

Cooper looked up. "His psych eval-"

"I know what he looks like on paper, sir. I'll be honest with you, Phelps can be a difficult man to get along with. He's egotistical, sarcastic, and half the time you want to punch him in the nose, but I vouched for him to be on my team in '06 and I'm vouching for him now." Ressler stood stiff and straight, waiting for the Assistant Director to respond. He was putting himself out there for this, but it would be worth it. Well, it would be if Jacob's wife didn't kill him for pulling him back into this mess.

Cooper sighed, the file falling flat on his desk and he plucked his glasses off his nose. "He's your responsibility, Agent Ressler."

"Understood," Ressler answered with a nod.

"Give him a call. I want this taken care of immediately."

"Already did. He's on his way."

"And if I'd put a stop to this?"

"Well, I guess he wouldn't have been allowed into the Post Office."

Cooper snorted and shook his head. "I hope we don't regret this."

* * *

They took him to a black site. Jacob had worked out of enough of them to recognize the signs immediately. His escort led him down a clunky elevator and into the site itself where he spotted a familiar face. Donald Ressler strode forward like a man on a mission.

"Liz is ready and waiting to be pissed at you. You've been warned," Jacob said with a half smirk, reaching out to catch the other man's offered hand.

"I don't plan to get on her bad side today," Ressler answered. "Come on."

Jacob tilted his head to the side, gaze sweeping out over the space. "What's going on, Ress?"

"Patience has never been your strong suit," the fair-haired man pointed out and started forward without any further explanation. Jacob wasn't entirely sure if he was being secretive because he was stubborn or if the information was need-to-know and the people around them hadn't been cleared. He followed without any further argument, hands stuffed into his pockets as he looked around, mentally filing the path they took away in case he needed it later.

The two men moved silently through the black site until they made it to a viewing room in which they were still trying to get their feeds up and running. A man turned around and Jacob recognized him instantly from various speeches he'd sat through after being stationed in the DC field office. He'd never met the man personally until that day, but most agents in the bureau would know him on sight.

"Harold Cooper, Assistant Director of Counter Terrorism," he introduced himself.

"Yes sir," Jacob answered. "Jacob Phelps. I'm out of the DC office." He glanced back at Ressler. "Do I get to find out what I'm doing here or do I just need to start tossing out theories and hope one of them sticks?"

"Feeds are up," someone called from across the room and Jacob turned, watching as a face he hadn't seen in several years flashed across the screen. Raymond Reddington was strapped to a chair, sitting patiently as someone injected what was probably a tracker into his arm. He was dressed in his usual attire sans the hat, sleeve pushed up only for the purpose of the tracker. He was calm, almost zen like, and it was always interesting when the universe reminded him that some things never changed.

Jacob chuckled softly to himself and glanced back at Ressler. "Oh yeah, Lizzie's going to kill you."

Ressler snorted. "Glad you canceled lecture?"

"Definitely."

* * *

TBC

Notes: So this story has been eating my brain the last couple of days. I told the idea to a couple of people and they seemed to really enjoy it. Major thanks and kudos to SaraBeth1 and theBlacklister23 for being my sounding board for Ressler's character. Writing Ressler and Red always makes me a little nervous, but they'll both have major roles in this story, so I'm hoping to do their amazing characters justice. I've written about 8K of this in twenty-four hours in and around life and work. Hold on, this is going to get really twisty before it straightens out!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter One.**

Jacob had spent five years of his life chasing down Raymond Reddington. The assignment had been handed over to Ressler only a couple years after his graduation from Quantico and they had expected the young agent to fail dismally. Reddington was nicknamed the Concierge of Crime for a reason. He was the best of the best, but Ressler's team had come so damn close so many times. Close enough for Jacob to have caught three rounds to the gut that had sidelined him permanently. He hadn't thought he'd ever get another chance at the man. This was like Christmas.

"How the hell did you catch him?" he asked after a moment, gaze never leaving the screen.

"He turned himself in."

That caught his attention and he whipped around to stare at his friend. Ressler shrugged. "That was my reaction."

"Just turned himself in?"

"Walked into the FBI building and asked to speak to Assistant Director Cooper."

"You know, if he'd done this years ago it would have saved us a lot of trouble."

"No kidding."

"He brought in a briefcase filled with information and aliases," Cooper chimed in. "We haven't received any demands from him yet, but they're bound to come."

"Oh yeah," Jacob agreed, "the bastard is definitely smug enough to waltz into the FBI and think he can run the show." He felt the muscles in his face twitch ever so slightly and he tilted his head to the side, gaze back on the man sitting in a box below them. His expression was unreadable to pretty much anyone looking, he knew, but inside he was swinging wildly between halfway giddy with the turn of events and angry enough to rip him to shreds. It had been a thrill to chase him down over the years. Being involved with Ressler's task force had given him a chance to channel the darker aspects of his personality into a constructive action rather than letting them control him, but now that he was benched he couldn't help but feel a little resentment over it. He wouldn't give his life with Liz up for anything, but he hated the feeling of being idle.

He turned a curious gaze on Ressler. "So are we going to take a couple rounds at him?" he asked quietly so that only the ginger man could hear him.

"We're going to wait to see what Cooper's orders are," Ressler answered and Jacob rolled his eyes a little, receiving an aggravated snort from the older man in return.

"Get the audio up," Cooper barked at his technicians and the sound buzzed loudly, crackling and then finally settling out.

Reddington must have heard it from where he was because he looked up towards the camera. "Evidently someone with the authority to make decisions has arrived. I think I smell the stench of your cologne, Agent Cooper. Smells like hubris."

Ressler shook his head from his place next to Jacob and the taller man crossed his arms over his chest, studying the feeds. There was more to this than met the eye, and both of them knew it. Reddington didn't do anything without a motive, but what could have possibly driven him to turn himself into the FBI was yet to be seen.

Cooper stepped up to the a microphone, his voice steady as if he regularly spoke to high-end criminals such as Reddington. For all Jacob knew, he did. "You turned yourself in."

Reddington smirked from his place in his glass box. "And I'm sure you're curious as to why," he answered. "There's a man that you're not after yet, but you will be. Victor Isaacs is responsible for abductions all over the world. High end, difficult to reach targets are his speciality. You'll find a list of his most well-known victims from the last decade in the briefcase that you confiscated from me. The FBI hasn't linked these cases yet, but I promise you, they were orchestrated by this one man. I want him. Now you will want him. So let's say for the moment that our interests are aligned."

Cooper motioned to one of his agents to find the paper that Reddington had indicated and Jacob shifted his weight. "He's not lying."

"The man is a notorious liar," Cooper countered and Jacob shrugged.

"And I have one hell of a BS meter. Sure, the man lies all the time. He could beat our best lie detector machines if he needed to, but right now, I'm telling you, sir, he's not lying."

Cooper's gaze shifted past him and to Ressler. "I learned a long time ago not to question him on this," Ressler grumbled and Jacob smirked.

"Sir, we're finding connections from this Victor Isaacs to all of these victims here," an agent told him and Jacob's smirk only grew.

The assistant director shook his head a little and Ressler shot him a glare. He schooled his expression as he watched Cooper step back up to the microphone. "You have my attention, Reddington."

"Oh good. That didn't take long. Now, Isaacs is currently working a job that will put a rather prominent politician in jeopardy. I am happy to help you track him down before this happens, but-"

"There are no buts," Cooper snapped.

"Of course there are. You don't get without giving a little, Agent Cooper. I imagine that you've brought in your top men on my case. I'd also imagine Agent Ressler is in the building. Who else? Is the whole team back together? Jonica and Raimo? Tell me, is Phelps still around did that last round finally get to him?"

Jacob stiffened a little where he stood and he could feel eyes on him from around the room.

Reddington chuckled. "I'd like to speak to the lead agent on my case. Until you can provide that, I won't say another word."

Cooper reached over and snapped the communication line off. "Ressler?"

"Yes sir."

"Get down there and get the answers out of him. If he's right about this, we don't have any time to waste."

Ressler gave a sharp nod and glanced over to his friend. "You don't have to-"

"You think I'm going to miss this for anything?" Jacob asked, his smile dark and he ran a hand through his shortly cropped hair.

"Of course you wouldn't," Ressler sighed. _Nor would he ask him to_ was left unsaid, but Jacob caught it loud and clear. He followed the other man back down to where the box sat in the middle of the large opening. He didn't have time to sort through his own feelings on the matter, so he pushed them down, burying them under several layers of calm topped off with confidence. Reddington would push buttons. That was what he was good at. The key was not letting him know if those buttons hit home or not, and Jacob was as good at keeping up a facade as Reddington was at trying to crack it.

Reddington's smile broadened as the two men walked towards the box. "Well, look at this. The gang _is_ back together. All for me?"

"Hardly," Ressler snorted. "We're here, now it's your turn."

The trapped criminal's gaze slid past Ressler and settled on Jacob. "You look much better now, Agent Phelps. A little more colour in your cheeks now that you're not half dead. Tell me, how long was that recovery time? It must have been-"

"Isaacs," Jacob said firmly. "Unless we're wasting our time. In that case we have better things to do."

"A pretty wife at home, so I hear," Reddington murmured and it was everything Jacob could do not to visibly tense at that.

"While your partner's fiance left, yours stayed. Amazing what life decisions can be made in the wake of barely avoided disasters. I do hope it didn't put a rift between the two of you."

"Looks like we're wasting our time," Ressler said, turning his back.

Jacob had barely gotten around to following him when Reddington began chuckling. "Oh, some things never change. That's always good to know. Senator Whyler. That is the next man on Isaac's list. This is my olive branch, gentleman. You may take it or leave it, but I'd suggest that you take it unless you'd prefer to explain to the good senator's widow that you could have stopped his death and didn't."

Neither of them said another word as they walked away, footsteps echoing through the large room as the made their way back up the stairs and into the viewing room. Cooper's attention was on them as soon as they entered, but it lingered on Jacob. The younger man knew why, but he brushed past it. "I assume I'm here for my opinion on this. This is it: if we pull Whyler out of Isaacs' reach he'll know we were tipped off. We'll lose him. We need to be ready to take Isaacs down as soon as he makes his move."

"Use the senator as bait?" Cooper asked, his tone sounding like he was trying to decide if Jacob was serious or not.

"We'll be in close enough, but yeah, if we want to bring this guy in. Otherwise we just save one life. Okay, but there'll be others."

"I'll take your advisement into consideration," Cooper said tightly. "We'll take it from here."

"I'd like to stay on to see it through, whatever you decide to do."

"You're not cleared for field duty."

"So what? I'll hang back when the others go in. Put me in a car for all I care."

Cooper straightened his back a little, standing a couple inches taller than Jacob, but the younger man had no problem holding his head high as he waited. "Fine. You're with Agent Ressler, but you are not to engage, is that understood?"

"Yes sir."

As soon as Cooper turned, Ressler sighed. " _Now_ your wife is going to kill me."

* * *

"This is a mistake."

Ressler glanced over at Jacob in the passenger seat of the FBI issued SUV, long legs bent at the knee and the heels of his boots wearing against the leather of the seat itself. "Scuffing the seats? Yeah. It is. What are you, twelve?"

Jacob snorted and let his feet fall heavily to the floor, still slumped in the seat. "Reddington wants something. I'm just not sure what yet."

"Isaacs."

"Yeah, well, it's got to be more than that. We chased the man for years and it's not like he ever just gave up. There's more to this."

Ressler sighed, gaze drifting out over the undercover agents ready for anything to go wrong. Cooper had decided to play it safe and escort the senator to safety. Jacob had grumbled about it, but that hasn't been a surprise. They'd worked on enough assignments together that the older man was used to it. "So you think giving Reddington a chance to get ahold of the senator would have been the right play?"

His former partner perked. "I don't think Whyler is the one Reddington's after."

"So you _do_ think he's after Isaacs?" He'd forgotten just how difficult it could be to get a straight answer from him. He was never sure if it was because the younger man got lost in his own thoughts or if he tried to be difficult. It really could have been either one.

"Just don't know why. That's what I don't trust."

Ressler couldn't say he disagreed. The whole thing felt like a trap to him. After twenty years of evading authorities Reddington shows up on their doorstep? No, it didn't set well with him either. Neither did letting a senator get abducted and killed. He didn't have to trust Reddington to accept the intel.

"And there goes our chance of catching the guy," Jacob huffed as they escorted the intended victim out the side door. His dark blue gaze shifted over to Ressler. "You should be in there. I don't need a babysitter."

The older man shrugged. "It's fine."

A smirk tilted Jacob's lips. "You're not looking for the senator."

Ressler didn't dignify it with an answer, but instead his attention swayed to movement along the backend of the building. He heard Jacob shift in his seat. "I'll take the south end-"

"No, you'll stay in the car," Ressler cut him off. "That was the deal."

Jacob sat back hard, an irritated expression plastered across his face.

Ressler shook his head. "You're the one that chose to take a desk job and didn't try for active field duty again."

"Not getting shot at for a while seemed like a decent life choice," he grumbled.

"Still might be. You'll stay, right?"

"I'll stay," the younger man grumbled, but Ressler had known him long enough not to trust him on it. Jacob could lie with the best of him when it suited him, and Ressler had watched him twist people around until they were questioning themselves rather than him. it had made him damn useful in the field when they had needed to go undercover. It also made him a pain in the ass because, no matter how loyal he could be if he deemed a person worthy of it, he picked and chose what he considered necessary truths. It drove Ressler up the wall.

"Just stay put," he growled as he slipped out of the vehicle. He risked one glance back in warning before taking off after Isaacs who had already circled around, just barely out of sight. He rounded the corner after him only to have to duck back, bullets flying in his direction and Ressler let out a low curse. He pressed his back up against the building, waiting and timing it before returning fire.

He waited a moment, listening carefully. He heard gunshots, but they weren't coming in his direction. After a beat he risked a look around the corner to see an irritatingly familiar figure walking towards the writhing figure on the ground who was clutching at his bleeding leg. Ressler snorted as he started forward towards Jacob, noting the frown on his former partner's face. As he closed the gap, he saw why. The man that had been shooting at them looked like Isaacs from a distance, but up close it was clear he was a decoy. Ressler turned his gaze on Jacob. " _You_ were supposed to wait in the car."

"Excuse me for saving your life, and look. This guy's still conscious. I count this as a win." Jacob crouched down and his lips tilted in a smile that had always made Ressler a little nervous. "So our new friend here can tell us where Isaacs really went."

"Man, you're going to get us _all_ killed," their bleeding captive hissed.

"As opposed to just the two of us?" Jacob growled back. "I doubt Isaacs paid you enough to deal with the fallout of trying to kill a couple of feds."

There was something in the decoy's gaze that was making Ressler uncomfortable. He'd pulled his phone out to call for a medical team to come around when the man choked out something about a bomb. Jacob's gaze jerked up to meet Ressler's and took hold of the man's collar to haul him up as Ressler barked a warning into the phone to clear the building.

The explosion picked them up off their feet and carried them through the air. Ressler hit hard against the pavement of the empty lot next to the building. His ears were ringing and he blinked hard to clear his head, finding blood trailing close to his eye from a cut. He reached up and wiped at it, trying to gauge the damage done.

Jacob was sitting up slowly, looking mostly intact, but Victor Isaacs' decoy lay still, facedown on the pavement. Ressler shook his head, instantly regretting the movement.

"You okay?" He looked over, finding Jacob rocked forward so that his elbows were braced against his bent knees, expression bordering on worried.

"Yeah. You?"

The younger man gave a short nod, rolling to his feet. They didn't speak as they hauled the unconscious man up between them and started around towards where help would be. This was a mess.

They rounded the corner to see people scurrying in all directions. Medical teams and security details were all over the place, pulling people out of the damaged building and helping those that were injured. The SUV that they'd come had been caught in the blast, the windows blown out and part of the inside looked like it was in the process of catching fire.

"Really glad I didn't wait in the car," Jacob quipped from the side and Ressler rolled his eyes. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

The fallout was tremendous. They had gotten the senator out, but the casualty rate was still climbing after the explosion. After getting checked out by medical and cleared, Jacob was sure the only reason he hadn't received the lecture of a lifetime was because Cooper was too busy with damage control to care.

Reddington, of course, denied any knowledge of the bomb. Questioning him was only sparking Jacob's temper, and after a few minutes he had to take a walk before he broke the obnoxious man's jaw. He kept telling them that they were looking at it all wrong, lecturing them like they were school children.

"You look like you need a breather," Ressler said from where he was standing in the doorway.

Jacob had found an office where he could pour over files, trying to find something they hadn't thought of yet. They needed an in that Reddington didn't provide. There was no way they could trust him after this.

"Jake?"

"Yeah?" he answered automatically, realizing he hadn't answered the first statement. "Yeah. Breather might be good. I barely had time to call Liz and let her know that it's a takeout sort of night."

"Bet she loved that."

Jacob shrugged. "I'm just hoping I don't end up on the couch tonight when she sees the evidence I can't hide," he grumbled, motioning to his bruised face and the medical tape that was holding a gash along his cheekbone together.

"Good to have someone that cares," Ressler said, his voice a little regretful.

"Yeah," Jacob agreed softly and stood. "I'm going to go grab dinner with her, shower, and I'll call you to see where we stand."

"Jake, this was just a consult. You don't have to-"

"I'm in now, Ress. You can't just pull me off it now." He paused, tilting his head and studying the other man. "Listen, I know I'm supposed to be out of the field, and I know I didn't exactly live by that today-"

"If you had you'd have been dead," Ressler said gruffly, pulling the first real smile from Jacob in hours.

"Did the perfect Boy Scout just admit that bending the rules can get you somewhere?"

"Don't put words in my mouth, Phelps," Ressler grumbled, a hint of a smile just barely visible. "Go home and see your wife. Just don't you dare put all the blame on me just because I'm not there to defend myself."

Jacob grinned as he stood. "When would I ever do that?"

"Every chance you get. Get out of here."

A chuckle escaped him as he grabbed his coat and eased it on, moving past his old partner. "The day sucked, but it was good working with you again."

"Little more exciting than your desk job?"

"Don't get me started." He stepped out of the office and started towards the lift, a car waiting for him so that he could easily get back when he was done. That was it, though, he promised himself. They had Reddington. He wasn't going anywhere. The job would finally be done and he would actually have a part in its ending. It was satisfying, but he couldn't let himself get caught up in the rush. He and Liz were building a family and he'd made promises to her he didn't intend to break.

Jacob was still running scenarios in his mind of how to ease the the blow of the conversation they were about to have and assure Liz that this was a one-time deal by the time he'd picked up Chinese and gotten to the front door. He could hear Hudson barking from the side yard and he pushed the inside door open. "Babe, sorry I'm late. It's been…" His voice trailed off as he saw the wreck their home had been left in. Lamps overturn, a chair from the dining room left in pieces, and his heart sank when he saw blood on the corner of the table. Takeout dropped from numb fingers as his wife's name left his lips, shouting it uselessly to the empty home. He rushed to the back door, pulling it open and Hudson came flying in as his cell phone rang loudly in his pocket. No Caller ID showed across the screen and he answered it. "Phelps."

" _Agent Phelps, so glad to catch you_ ," came an unfamiliar voice in the other end. " _By now I imagine you've gotten home and found what's missing._ "

"If you hurt her, I swear to you-"

" _I want you to call off the search_."

"I don't have the authority to do that," he managed.

" _Then I would suggest you find someone that does. Your wife's life depends on it, Agent Phelps._ "

The line went dead in his ear and Jacob felt numbing fear course through him. It was rare, so very rare, that he almost didn't recognize it. Slowly he dialed a different number.

" _Nothing's changed in the hour you've been gone,_ " Ressler's snappy voice greeted him.

"He took her, Ress," Jacob breathed. "Isaacs took Liz."

* * *

TBC

Notes: The timeline is starting mostly the same on this, with Red showing up in 2013, but because he's not showing up to out Jacob to Liz, things will, of course, be a little bit different and will be differing from the show in many ways because of the change in the dynamics of relationships. I'm about 13.5K into the writing process right now and I can't tell you how excited I am for this. I'd love to hear your thoughts on it and if you'd like to see any specific blacklisters. They may or may not be able to be worked in, but I can look :)

Next time - Elizabeth Phelps is held captive and Raymond Reddington may be the FBI's best lead.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Two.**

She came to in a room she didn't recognize, her head aching and her vision slow to focus. Elizabeth Phelps sat up carefully, finding the blood matted in her dark hair the most likely cause of her building headache. She frowned, taking in her surroundings. She was in a small room, the only Windows high enough up that it would be very difficult to reach them. It was dirty, like no one had used the room in some time, and the empty shelves to the side led her to think it might have once been a storage room of some kind. Well, it was again. They were just storing her.

Carefully she stood, testing her balance and stretching limbs to make sure she hadn't missed any injuries. Her mind was working through a fog, but slowly the pieces of what had happened came together. She had gotten home, taken Hudson out, called Jacob and found out that the day had gone to hell and he'd explain more when he got home, and then…. Then things got spotty. The door had been forced open. She hadn't heard it, but she'd noticed it when passing by the door. A cloth had been pressed against her nose and mouth, a sickly sweet smell making her head swim before she had reared back, her elbow catching her attacker in the ribs and her head connecting hard with his nose. He had tried to make a run for it to the back door, but he'd caught her, using the momentum to swing her around and she had tripped over one of the chairs and that was the last thing she remembered. She must have hit her head on the table.

The door to her cell opened and Liz tensed, but the sight of her captor's blackened eyes and broken nose nearly brought a smile to her face. He smirked at her. "Good to see you awake, Mrs Phelps. I just talked to your husband. He seemed very concerned."

_Concerned_ was likely an understatement, if Liz knew the man she'd married at all. Angry, worried, and so focused on her that he wouldn't bother with any of the dangers that surrounded him. She just hoped Don would be able to talk him down before he rushed after her himself. She didn't want to be the reason he got hurt. That had never been what she wanted.

"I hear he's clever. He'll either find a way to distract his team or he'll find himself a widower. You may have a lot of spunk, but it's not going to save you."

He reached forward, grabbing Liz by the chin and her eyes turned cold. "You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into," she told him, her voice low and dangerous. "I'm not the one dying tonight."

* * *

"Agent Phelps, you can't just-"

Jacob blew past the sputtering agent. Ressler hadn't met him at the door, so he knew he had a precious few minutes before someone alerted the lead agent he was here and Ressler put a stop to what was about to happen. "Open it up," he barked, motioning at the box that Reddington was sitting in.

The Concierge of Crime perked up, turning his piercing gaze on the younger man as the door slid open. "Agent Phelps, to what do I owe this-"

"You son of a bitch, what has Isaacs done with her?" Jacob hissed, his hands gripping Reddington's vest and he would have hauled him out of the chair if he hadn't been chained to it.

Reddington blinked, actually looking surprised. "She? She who?"

"Jacob!" Ressler shouted from behind him and all of a sudden he was being hauled out of the box. "Hey, you can't just-"

"She's _gone_ , Ress! That bastard broke into our home and took her. Reddington-"

"Has been here the entire time. There's no way he could have set this up."

" _Phelps_ ," Reddington snapped, all of his usual mockery put aside and his voice deadly serious. "Calm down. What happened?"

"My wife. Your people-"

"Isaacs has Elizabeth?"

The way Reddington said her name caused a chill to settle in him and Jacob managed a small nod, not trusting his own voice in the wake of it.

"We're fine. Everything is fine," Ressler assured a guard. "Jake, come on. We're going to turn the city upside down to find her. He's not going to hurt Liz."

"I can't take a chance," Jacob managed.

"Of course you can't, and you won't." Both men turned to the source of the words. "Isaacs isn't my man and I certainly didn't send him after your wife, but I can help you save her. You don't need to trust me, but you will need to listen to me. How long has it been since she was taken?"

Jacob glanced at the time. "I talked to her around eight when I left. Got home around nine and there was a struggle. Isaacs called and I came straight here. It's nine thirty."

"Hell, Jake," Ressler breathed.

"Demands?"

"That we let him go. We're not."

"I should say not. Victor has dug his own grave on this one. If you wouldn't mind letting me out of this box, we have work to do." His gaze fell on Jacob directly. "Your wife's life depends on it."

Jacob set his jaw, mind buzzing with the pros and cons and everything in between. He glanced at Ressler. It was technically his call if Cooper wasn't on site, and the fact that the man wasn't breathing down his neck for the stunt he pulled when he entered meant he likely wasn't.

Ressler's lips thinned out into a grimace. "Leave the cuffs on him, but get him up. We're all hands on deck to find Elizabeth Phelps." He turned towards Jacob and the younger man saw a pity in his eyes that he hated. "We'll find her."

"I know. I'm going in when we do."

"Jake-"

"I'm either going in with the FBI or I'll go in alone. Your call."

He knew he was putting Ressler in a dangerous position. The man was like a walking rule book for the bureau. His nickname during their time at the academy had been Boy Scout and nearly a decade later it still stuck for a reason. It took a hell of a lot for him to colour outside the lines, but just once, Jacob needed him to put aside that rigidness just for a little while. Just long enough to get Liz home safely. "I'll take the blame when it's done," he said quietly.

Ressler snorted. "We need a timeline. Every second from the time you stepped in to after he called. What did you notice?"

Jacob nodded, relaying everything he'd seen. A team would be sent to his home to tear it apart, their lives turned upside down in hopes of finding a way to save his wife. This. _This_ was why he'd gotten out of the field. There were just too many risks involved, and he should have known better than to put himself in the position for those risks to hurt someone innocent like Liz. He just wish the reminder hadn't come quite so harshly.

* * *

She wasn't sure how many hours had passed. They'd left her mostly alone after the initial threat, the only sounds she heard the occasional footsteps. Three distinct sets, she thought. One belonged to the man that had taken her, so likely two hired thugs with him.

The sun was filtering into the windows by the time that the door opened again, revealing one of her captor's guards, followed closely by the second. They both looked entirely irritated. "Your husband and his people are searching Mr Isaac's accounts," the larger one said, his voice gruff. "The FBI was told to stand down. Mr Isaac's demands are non-negotiable."

Liz didn't answer him, instead letting her gaze follow back into the hall behind them. All she needed to do was get around them and she was home free.

"It's only a matter of time before they track this place down, but they're going to find you in pieces, sweetheart," the second said, leering at her and he pulled a knife open. Her expression glossed over, almost as if she were bored beyond reason by the announcement that they were there to kill her.

"Here's the thing," Liz said calmly, running a hand through her dark hair to push it out of her face, "if you're going to make a threat, you sure as hell better be able to deliver."

They didn't see her move, in all likelihood, much less realize what was happening. She sidestepped the first swipe of the knife, taking the second man's gun that he had halfway out of the holster. She slammed it around, hitting the first man hard with the barrel of it across the face, sending him stumbling, and followed through to put two bullets in the man she'd originally stolen it from. She shifted her stance, blue eyes cold and calculating as her gaze leveled on the first man, his own expression confused. "No one said anything about you being a fed too," he managed and Liz snorted, the sound coming out almost as a laugh.

"That's because I'm not," she told him simply and he was dead before he hit the ground.

She didn't waste any time as she darted out the door and into the hallway. She was in a warehouse of some kind, old and abandoned from the looks of it. She didn't wait long to try to gain her bearings, but took off down the hall, gun clutched in her hand. Issacs was still out there and he was the one she had to worry about. Well, that and explaining to Jacob how she'd gotten away. Funny, the biggest lies always seemed to come the easiest for her. She thought it was because people were inclined to think no one would be stupid enough to try to pull something like that. She'd come up with something by the time the FBI found her.

A bullet ricocheted off the ground at her feet and she whipped around, gun aimed. No one was there, but she took a hard hit to the back that made her stumble forward, barely catching herself before she fell all the way to the ground. When she got turned around she saw Isaacs standing there, a smug look on his face. "You thought you could get out of here after all this trouble? You're going to get to be their lesson."

"You people and your threats you can't live up to," she growled as she just barely missed with the next shot. She frowned, feeling the weight of the gun differ just a little, and the next shot clicked, signalling an empty magazine. That was fine. She wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty.

His own loaded gun was the biggest threat and she eliminated it quickly, sending it skidding across the room and out of both of their reaches. She blocked a punch, landed a kick, and ducked under another rough blow, only to be caught on the other side and sent stumbling around. He was bigger than her, but she'd fought bigger. She'd taken down meaner.

Liz dropped to the ground, sliding across the dirty floor and taking his legs out from under him by the shins. His yelp was cut off as her foot slammed into his jaw and his head snapped to the side. He must have been seeing stars for a moment with the way he sat there, but he rolled over and managed a decent blow that split her lip.

They parted back, Liz on her toes and ready for the next round. She'd finish it. She had to.

"Does he know?" Isaacs asked, and the question caught her a little off guard. His smile broadened just a little and she saw blood on his teeth. "Does your husband know you're not what you pretend to be?"

"No," she said softly. "And he won't."

She would have finished it then, but the sound of a door down the hall being flung open, followed by a shout of " _FBI!_ " took her attention away for a split second. It was enough to give him two steps towards the exit and for her to know that if she followed him it would destroy everything. She had to let him go and she had to play the part. Don Ressler would be leading the team in, if for no other reason than to keep Jacob from doing it. She had to make this believable.

So Elizabeth Phelps tucked herself away in a corner and the tears built in her eyes as her entire body shook, the perfect example of a woman terrified of what she'd just seen.

* * *

He hadn't slept at all. Even if he'd had time, he knew he wouldn't have been able to drift off, not until she was home and safe. Jacob and Ressler had both been working around the clock following leads, Reddington surprisingly cooperative. The man had shaved hours of search time off and had led them almost immediately to Isaacs' banker who had intimate knowledge of his movements. That had led them to what looked like an abandoned warehouse that they hoped was the right location.

Jacob braced himself as they readied the ram. His gun was clutched in his hand - it was surprising how after two years of desk duty how easily it still fit - and he wore a vest with FBI written in large, bold letters across it. He'd joked over the years that it was a _please aim here_ sign for all the people trying to kill them. Well, better that than the head, he supposed.

"Ready when you are, sir," one of the men up front called and Ressler gave the the signal.

The door to the warehouse went down in one swift hit, clammering so badly that it made Jacob's ears ring. He didn't flinch though, just followed in, gun raised, and was a little disappointed that they were met with silence on the other side. His gaze swept the empty room as the other agents fanned out and he shot Ressler a look. "We're too late," he murmured. "They're already gone. They moved her."

Ressler opened his mouth and closed it. Jacob felt his shoulders drop and his eyes slipped closed. He'd lost her. They had been so close and he'd lost her.

"Agent Ressler, they've found someone in the back," an agent called from a hallway opening. "A lady. About thirty or so, just-"

Jacob didn't hear the rest. He was in full sprint past his friend and past the agent speaking, down the hall, and he nearly ran over one young FBI agent who was standing at the end of it. Liz was being checked over my another agent, but when he entered she turned wide blue eyes on him and he forgot to breathe for a moment. He wasn't sure how she moved so fast, but somehow she was in his arms and he had her pulled as close as he could, fingers tangled in her hair and he pressed a kiss to the side of her head. "It's okay, Lizzie," he promised as she clung to him, her arms wrapped around his middle so tightly that if he hadn't had the vest on it might have actually hurt. "It's okay, babe. I have you. I have you."

"You shouldn't be here," his wife sniffed and that pulled a short chuckle from him.

"I had to. I had to get you home. Nothing else mattered."

Liz tightened her hold on him before leaning back and then up, one hand coming to the side of his face as she tipped up on her toes to kiss him. It was like the world went strangely silent around them, all the usual ruckus of a finished operation pushed to the side for the goal that had been so entirely personal.

The sound of someone awkwardly clearing their throat at the doorway caused them to break and Jacob turned to see Ressler holstering his weapon, giving him a slightly uncomfortable look. "Warehouse is clear. We've got two dead men in a back room, but no sign of Isaacs. You okay, Liz?"

The tears had already stopped and as he pressed one last kiss to her forehead he could feel that she'd already stopped shaking. Jacob had known a wide range of people over the years, but Elizabeth Phelps might have been the strongest one he knew. She was a professor of psychology. This was the _last_ thing that she should have had to worry about, yet she was already gathering herself together in the aftermath. He never ceased to be amazed.

"I think so," she answered Ressler's question and pulled away from Jacob just a little, though her hand slipped down into his and held on there. "Who's Isaacs? Is he the man that took me?"

"We'll get him, Lizzie," Jacob promised softly.

"Who is he?"

Both men remained silent and Jacob squeezed her hand. "Part of a case that we can't talk about."

She snorted. "I guess I'm part of the same case now."

"After the medics check her over she'll need to come in for a statement," Ressler said. "I'll hold Cooper off as long as I can, but-"

"Oh I know," Jacob chuckled mirthlessly. "Believe me I know."

"You weren't supposed to come, were you?" Liz asked and her husband offered her a lopsided smile.

"Hmm?"

She rolled her eyes and swatted him on the arm.

His smile didn't fade as he walked with her outside to the waiting ambulance, not missing the hurried messenger that accosted Ressler on their way out. "Be right back," he promised and stepped away, not liking the look on his former partner's face. "What happened?"

"Reddington slipped his detail."

"What? He had-"

"I know how many men he had on him," Ressler snapped. "Listen, go with Liz and-"

Jacob frowned deeply. "I told you I'd take the heat for this. It's on me," he bit out, the words forced. If it were anyone else he would have been happy to take the out, but his loyalty was hard-earned and Ressler had managed that years ago. The man drove him crazy half the time, but he was a good man, better than Jacob would ever know how to be, and he didn't deserve to have his career tanked because he couldn't tell a friend not to go in and save his wife. "I'll have a protective detail bring her by when they clear her and I can take her home from there. You know, after Cooper tears me a new one."

Ressler looked like he might try for one more protest, but stopped, and offered him a half smile. "Good working with you again, pal," he said instead. "Didn't realize just how much I missed it."

"Just like old times," Jacob answered, though they both knew it wouldn't last. He'd be lucky if he were just benched after this stunt.

* * *

"Are you sure it's her? It's been years since we've had a lead."

Raymond Reddington pulled in a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "It's her. I would stake my life on it," he answered as the car pulled to a stop. "This is it?"

Mr Grey killed the engine. "Yes sir. They said they would deliver him here."

"Excellent," Reddington said as he opened the car door and unfolded himself. They were on the outskirts of the city, parked just next to an old building. The door opened and a man shoved another out into the open, sending him stumbling to the broken asphalt at their feet. "Victor Isaacs, it's been some time," the Concierge of Crime greeted with a smile before turning his attention to what had turned out to be an incredibly reliable bounty hunter. "Payment has been wired to your account with a bonus for your speed. Thank you."

"Thank you, Mr Reddington," the man said. "Gotta warn ya, he's a handful."

"I'm sure he is."

Reddington watched as the bounty hunter nodded and scuffled away, leaving he and Isaacs alone with Grey standing by the car. The deceptive smile returned to his thin lips and he strode forward. Isaacs looked up at him, the gag making it impossible to do more than grumble worriedly at him. Reddington pulled it from his mouth.

Isaacs coughed and swallowed hard. "What is all of this, Reddington?"

"You took a young woman very recently. A federal agent's wife. Elizabeth Phelps."

Red watched as the irritated expression the professional kidnapped wore melted into fear. "Phelps? That woman is _nuts_. She was suppose to be an easy grab to teach her husband a lesson. I've never seen anyone move like that."

"Like what?" Reddington asked cautiously.

"She was fast. Trained. _Very_ well trained. Who the hell is she?"

Reddington studied him for a moment before reaching around and pulling his gun from its holster. "She is no longer your concern."

The shot went off and Isaacs fell dead. Red turned as Mr Grey stepped forward. "Mr Kaplan is already on her way." He paused, his pale eyes moving to look at the dead body. "What do you think has happened to her in the years she's been missing?"

A sigh escaped the older man. "I don't know, but I will find out."

"We'll continue with the plan, sir? The task force?"

"Yes. I need to get close, and her husband is, regretfully, my best way of doing that."

Grey's expression remained neutral. "He may refuse to work with you after what happened in Vienna."

"Well I'll just have to make sure he doesn't have a choice, won't I?" Reddington asked with a forced smile and climbed into the backseat of the car. "I don't like it any better than he will, but Elizabeth's safety is my priority. If that means that I have to work with her husband, her life is worth that price."

"Then we're returning to the FBI?"

"Yes. It's time to get this started. Dembe is stateside, isn't he?"

"He is."

"Good, once you drop me off, have him on standby. I'll give them a list of names they can choose from and I imagine his will be one of the two they'll pull. Maybe I'll get lucky and the other will be Luli." He hummed softly to himself at the thought, leaning back in his seat. Slowly, the amusement died away as the started back in to the city and towards the black site. The last person he _wanted_ to work with was Special Agent Jacob Phelps - followed closely by Donald Ressler, who would also be involved in all of this, but he'd known that as well - and now he would be working with both. It had been a possibility. He had known that from the moment Elizabeth had resurfaced on his radar, after years of searching without a decent lead, as the wife of one of the men that had been tasked to bring him into the US government dead or alive. The universe certainly seemed to have a sense of humour. That was fine. Raymond Reddington hadn't gotten to where he was by being inflexible.

* * *

TBC

Notes: So, Liz is a badass spy, Red has been looking for her, and who would have thought Jacob would have been the one in the dark? Poor guy. If you're enjoying the Tessler bromance, I'd recommend popping over to SaraBeth1's account and reading her newest story (GnomeGate). It will have you laughing and wanting to give them both a huge hug.

Please let me know what you're thinking of this! I'm enjoying writing it, but I really would love to hear your feedback on it. Are you liking the twists and turns so far, the pacing?  Seriously, feedback helps me a lot as a writer and lets me know what you, as the reader, are enjoying :)

Next time - Cooper gives Jacob an ultimatum and the Phelps household receives an interesting (and unwanted) visitor.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Three**

He was exhausted. The last couple of days were starting to weigh on him. Cooper had been waiting at the Post Office when they had gotten there and hadn't given Jacob two seconds to say anything, but instead had hauled Ressler behind closed doors. They were back there for some time, to the point that Liz finished giving her statement before theyd even come out.

"You still haven't found him?" his wife asked, her voice steady but he could hear the undercurrent of worry there.

"We will. There'll be a detail outside the house until we do. I called Kelly. She has Hudson and she's going to meet you there so you don't have to be alone."

"I'll be fine. She doesn't need to do that."

"You know her. She insisted." Jacob leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'll be home as soon as Cooper finishes chewing me out and I get told I'll never come off desk because of this stunt."

That pulled a small smile from her. "Well, you weren't planning to anyway."

He winked at her. "They don't need to be reminded of that. Make them think they're punishing me, babe. Come on."

Liz laughed softly and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you."

"Love you too. I'm… I'm so glad you're okay. I'll be home as soon as I can, I promise."

"Looks like Don needs you."

Jacob risked a look back and Ressler had finally emerged. He did not look happy as he motioned to him. Reluctantly he released his wife. "Love you."

"You just said that," Liz said with a smile.

"Just want to make sure you know." He forced himself to turn, knowing that if he didn't he wouldn't be able to fight the urge to go home with her, crawl into bed, and hold on like he'd never let go. Slowly he climbed the steps, wincing inwardly at his friend's expression. "How bad?"

"You're not going to leave happy," Ressler answered bluntly, but motioned to where Liz was being escorted out. "Someone going to be there with her?"

"Kelly's going over."

Ressler blinked at him. "What's your mom doing in town?"

"I guess it really has been a while, hasn't it? She and Bruce moved to DC about three months ago. Something about not getting to see me the first fourteen years of my life or something like that."

Ressler snorted a laugh and Jacob quirked a small smile in return, following the older man into the office. Copper was sitting behind a desk, hands folded, and glasses perched on his nose. Beneath his hands were piles of paperwork. "We've made a deal with Raymond Reddington."

Jacob blinked. "They found him?"

"He came back. Seems he wants to work with the FBI as an informant. There are certain details still being ironed out, but it's looking like it will work in our favour and may save lives."

"That's great and all, but why tell me? Sounds like something way above my cubical down at the DC office."

"I'm putting in for your transfer."

"Excuse me?"

"Transfer," Cooper repeated gruffly. "To the task force being set up for this. Your knowledge-"

"I'm sorry, but I'm not sure if you missed the part where I'm no longer cleared for field duty or the part that I kind of shattered protocol to rescue my wife."

Cooper gave him a forced smile and pulled his glasses from his nose. "Let me be frank with you, Agent Phelps. I don't like you. I don't trust you. I'd prefer to let the DC office deal with you and your _blatant_ insubordination, but you seem to be one of the demands Reddington has made that he won't budge on. That means that I am stuck with you here. It will take a couple of days to get everything cleared, so I'll understand if you take those to be with your wife after everything, but I'll expect you in for a few hours on Monday to take your physical for active field duty. Take the paperwork, look it over. I'll have more forms for you to sign once you're medically cleared."

"I'm sorry, but _Reddington_ demanded? The man that wants me dead?"

"He was very insistent."

"Because he wants me dead," Jacob pressed, shaking his head. "Listen, I never reapplied for active field duty because I don't _want_ it. My wife and I… You know what? I don't have to explain it to you. No. Thanks for the consideration, but tell Reddington to go screw himself."

"Then instead of going through your physical I'll expect your resignation letter on Monday."

"My what?"

"Are you hard of hearing as well, Agent Phelps? Your letter. This task force will be your new job. If you don't want it, you're welcome to walk away from the FBI. That's your choice."

Jacob felt like someone had pulled a rug out from under him. The world shifted and he couldn't breathe as easily as before. He stared at the assistant director for several long moments before turning around and walking out of the office without another word, his expression entirely blank as he started down the stairs.

" _Jake_ ," Ressler hissed from behind, grabbing his arm halfway down.

The younger man whirled on him, the mask cracking and replaced with a surge of emotion even as he spoke so low that only his friend could hear him. "Liz and I are adopting, Ress. We're in the final stages. That's why Kelly and Bruce moved to DC, to help us out."

Ressler stared at him, shock clearly plastered across his face. "You're… I didn't know. I didn't even know you guys were trying."

"It's because we haven't told people. Just my folks. We didn't know… with my background, I didn't know if they'd let us. I don't know... but we are, and they _are_ going to let us. I'm going to have a kid, Ress. I can't be getting blown up and shot at and whatever the hell else Reddington would get us into. I have to think about Liz and the baby."

"I'm sorry, man," the fair haired man said quietly, shaking his head. "It's… I get it, but Cooper won't budge. It's not really even his call, he's just the one giving the news. Are you going to give him your resignation?"

"And do what?" Jacob whispered. "This is all I've known. It's all I'm good at." He sighed, leaning against the railing. " _Reddington_ ," he grumbled, the word escaping him like a curse. "He's screwing me any which way I turn."

"He's not going to take you away from your family, Jake. This team Cooper wants to build, we'll watch each other's backs."

"Are you on it?"

"Yeah."

He forced himself to inhale, trying to settle his frayed nerves. "I need to get some sleep and talk to Liz. It's not just my decision anymore."

Ressler nodded. "She's really gotten to you, hasn't she?" he murmured, the tease one that had been there for a couple of years now.

"I love her, Ress. She's the _only_ woman I've ever loved. Yeah, she's gotten to me."

"Let me know if you need anything this weekend and, uh, let me know what you decide. We'll have to try to handle the situation with Reddington if you go a different way."

"If I quit."

"Yeah."

Jacob nodded. "You'll be the second person to know."

* * *

Liz had expected to be smothered when her husband's parents had moved to DC, but had quickly learned that Bruce and Kelly Jones were very likely the most even keeled people she had ever met. Bruce, a retired elementary school principal was quiet and gruff, but had, from what Liz could gather, provided the right kind of structure that Jacob had needed as a child and Kelly had balanced it out with a sweet spirit that had somehow convinced an angry teenage boy that someone could care about him. Jacob had told the story in pieces and she was sure he'd glossed over some of the darker parts about his final foster home that he'd run from at fourteen. He'd stolen their car and credit cards and had gotten as far as New York City from Chicago when he'd stolen Kelly Jones' purse. Instead of pressing charges she had taken home, fed him, and given him a place to sleep for the night. Jacob still joked that they were lucky they had any of their jewelry left by morning, and if that bed had been any less comfortable things might have played out much differently. He hadn't stolen their things, though, and the Jones' had taken him in, helped handle the legal situation that he was in, and his juvie records had been sealed up tight. It was more than Liz could wrap her mind around with her own very different - and very secret - circumstances.

"Have they told you if it'll be a girl or boy yet?" Kelly called from the kitchen, pulling her daughter-in-law from her thoughts.

"Not yet. There are some promising possibilities though."

Kelly moved across the living room and set a mug of tea down for Liz. "I'm so glad that you two are doing this. You know, Bruce and I got so caught up in our careers that it was like we'd woken up one day and realized that we never had that family we'd always wanted, and then Jacob fell into our lives. I won't tell you it'll always be _easy_ , but-"

Hudson jumped up suddenly at their feet and Liz turned toward the door where a set of keys were being fit into the lock. Jacob should have called on his way home, but he hadn't. That had to mean that something was wrong. Maybe they had found Isaacs and he'd told them what he'd seen. After two years of marriage, everything was about to end. She should have killed that bastard when she had the chance.

"Hey, babe," her husband's voice drifted in. "Just realized I didn't call you on my way. Sorry. How're you doing?"

He looked exhausted, not angry, and Liz tried to hide her relief. "Okay. Your mom's been great. As usual. Did you get the guy?"

"Not yet. It's okay, they're going to stay out there tonight and I'm taking a long weekend."

"You don't have to-"

"I want to," he cut her off and for the first time she heard the edge in his voice. He was afraid for her. Guilt was not something she was accustomed to, but she felt it building as she uncurled herself from the couch and wrapped her arms around him. He returned the embrace. "I'm so sorry, Lizzie."

Liz pulled in a steadying breath. "This was _not_ your fault. You saved me."

Jacob smiled and the guilt eased just a little. "I'm just glad you're okay. I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you," he murmured and his gaze shifted behind her. "Hey, Kelly."

"Hey, sweetie. You look exhausted. I'll let you two get some sleep."

Liz released her husband so that he could give his mother a hug. The small woman wrapped her arms around him tightly and spoke very quietly in his ear. "Yeah," he murmured. "I know."

Kelly smiled. "I have that big catering function tomorrow and you know there's always good left overs. If you two are up for it, drop by for dinner."

"We'll let you know," Jacob promised. "First one here, isn't it?"

"It is, but they're old clients. It's not the big deal it used to be," she laughed and started for the door. "Love you two. Call if you need anything. Bruce will be around the house tomorrow during the day."

"Thanks, Mom," Jacob chuckled and Kelly beamed at the rare use of the name.

Liz thanked her again for coming locked the door behind her. She felt Jacob's arms wrap around her from behind and leaned back into the embrace. "What'd she tell you?"

"She was just reminding me to be honest."

"About what?"

He sighed and pressed a kiss to the crook of her neck. "This doesn't leave our home, okay?"

"It never does," she lied.

Jacob swallowed hard and Liz turned in his arms, seeing the conflict. "You can tell me anything."

"I know," he said softly. "The, uh, situation today. Yesterday, now, I guess, when Ress called. It was Reddington. He turned himself in to the FBI,"

Well that wasn't what she had expected. "Why?"

"Still not entirely sure. He wants to work with us. Like a CI."

Liz thought her world might be crashing down all at once. She'd managed to convince her employer that Jacob was still useful even when he had been sidelined. He had access to information, she had argued, and leaving him right after he had proposed would only cause needless suspicion. She hadn't told them that she had been the one that had asked him not to go back into the field. She still had trouble justifying that one even to herself. "What does that have to do with you? You're in a cubicle in the DC office."

"They're putting together a task force to handle the cases he brings forward."

Liz's expression darkened. "You're not cleared for the field."

"I know. They want me to take the test."

"And if you say no?"

"Then I'm handing them my resignation."

They would discharge him. Permanently. Berlin would never let her stay. "Babe," she managed and he tried for a smile. He was usually so much better at faking it, but that night he looked like he just didn't have it in him.

"I may not even be able to pass the medical exam. Not with what they'll need for this." He closed his eyes, loosing a long breath. "I mean, this doesn't have to be decided now. I have until Monday and you've been through hell. How're you holding up? What do you need?"

Liz pursed her lips together. She knew exactly what he was doing. He didn't want to think about it, didn't want to make the decision. It wasn't that he _wasn't_ worried about her, she knew that he was, but it was so much easier to focus on that than it was this question. "You love your job, Jacob," she pointed out softly.

"No, I love _you_."

Liz let her eyes slip closed and leaned into him. "I don't deserve you, you know."

Jacob snorted a laugh. "I'm a handful. You don't have to sugarcoat it."

She echoed the laugh. "Funny, your mom was telling me the same thing."

"Hey now," he teased and she kissed him.

He melted into it and she felt his hands traveling up her back and tangling in her dark hair. "Let's go upstairs," she murmured, voice a little raw in the moment. "We don't have to decide tonight."

She didn't have to ask him twice and that was for the best. She wanted to lose herself with him, because he wasn't the only one that didn't want to face the answer to the question that she had hoped never needed to be asked. Either she was asking him to work with Reddington, the man that had nearly killed him, and therefore putting her husband into danger, or she risked being pulled from the assignment and losing him forever. Both set a deep sort of pain in her that she wasn't accustomed to. There had to be a third option, she just hadn't found it yet. She just had to buy time until she did.

* * *

Jacob woke to gunshots that night and it took a moment for him to register that they had only been in his dreams. He laid in bed for a long moment, hoping that he wouldn't wake the woman sleeping next to him. She was surprisingly peaceful for what she'd been through, and he didn't want to be the one to ruin that with his own demons he still fought. When she stirred but didn't wake, he loosed a sigh of relief.

After he was sure that she was sleeping soundly he eased himself out from under the blankets, fumbling for his glasses on the bedside table. The dark room came into focus as he set them on his nose and he walked lightly towards the door and down the stairs. There was no reason to lie there when he knew he wouldn't sleep any more that night.

Jacob froze halfway down the steps at the sight of a figure sitting on his couch. The man was scratching a very happy Hudson between his scruffy ears and gave him a smile. Raymond Reddington lifted his glass of pilfered scotch like Jacob were the guest and he was offering him a glass.

"What the hell are you doing in my home?" the agent demanded, wishing more than anything that he was armed, but his personal side arm was tucked away in a drawer upstairs.

"Well that's hardly a welcome," Reddington answered, the smile not fading. "Have a drink. It does wonders for the nerves."

Jacob set his jaw, gripping the banister so hard that his knuckles were white. "Get out."

The smile finally faded a little and the older man set the glass down in a coaster on the coffee table, leveling a more serious look at Jacob. "I understand that you're having doubts about Harold's little task force."

"How did you get past the protective detail outside?"

"Oh, I think you know that's easier done than they'd like to admit, but they're hardly needed. Isaacs is dead. You're welcome."

Slowly, he descended the final steps and moved towards the criminal sitting in his living room. "I didn't thank you for killing a man that we could have-"

"Oh please. Your act may fool just the right people in the Bureau, but it hardly fools _me_." The smirk returned and his gaze was piercing, even in the dark. "Jacob Phelps, born 1980 in Chicago, Illinois, to a mother who barely bothered with you for the first three years of your life until social services finally took you away, though _taking_ would imply that she was even there to protest it. You floated from one foster home to the next, never fitting in, never quite acceptable. That could make anyone callous, but I'd wager that you started out pretty far down that road from the beginning, didn't you? Given a slightly different set of circumstances, you could have made a very talented criminal with your… natural disconnect with people. Instead, you turned it towards the FBI and became quite the field operative. Tell me, did you do that for yourself or because the people you actually _did_ find to care about wanted you to be a better man than you might have been otherwise?"

Jacob had sat through more psychological evaluations than he cared to admit to, but none of them had hit quite as close to home as Reddington just had. He shoved the panic down as hard and fast as he could and covered it with a slow, almost lazy smile, head tilted to the side. "You think you know me, Reddington, but you don't. You don't know anything about me or who I care about, but I know you. You're after something and I'm going to find out what. When I do, I'm going to use it to take you down." The smile only grew. "I'm going to make you regret bringing me into this."

Reddington opened his mouth as if he were going to respond, but something behind Jacob caught the older man's attention. A stair creaked and Jacob turned, finding Liz pulling her robe a little tighter around her body. " _You_ ," she managed, her tone balanced somewhere between fear and loathing.

"Elizabeth," Reddington breathed and Jacob took a step to the side between the man and his wife, suddenly uncomfortable with the way he was almost gaping at her.

"Get out or I'll put a bullet through your skull."

Reddington cleared his throat and stood, placing his fedora on his head and securing it there. "What your motives are for joining the task force mean very little to me, Agent Phelps, but you will join." He leaned down to pet Hudson again before moving to the front door, offering a wave over his shoulder. "Good luck on your medical test Monday. I'm sure you'll pass it with flying colours."

Jacob felt his body relax just a little as the door shut behind him and Liz moved down the steps and touched his shoulder. Her hand lingered there before drifting down and holding tight to the folds of his t-shirt. "Promise me you'll always come home?" she said softly.

His chest tightened, and he turned so he could look her in the eye. She was giving him her blessing. This wonderful woman that he loved more than anything was telling him not to throw away the job that he was so damn good at, as long as he promised not to give his life up for it. "I promise. I will _always_ come home to you."

She smiled, the expression strained as she touched his face and kissed him. "And I'll always be here," she finished their promise and, not for the first time, he was certain that he didn't deserve a woman like Liz. She was too understanding and too living for someone like him, and never wanted to take that for granted.

* * *

TBC

Notes: I wasn't planning to update this again until tomorrow or Thursday, but then I did it anyway :)

Please let me know how you're liking this. I feel like it's being well received. I love to hear your thoughts on it. They make me smile and they help keep the muse working hard to write on it.

To the Guest that asked about adoption, yes. It's still going to be a part of this story. The fact that the Keens wanted to adopt in the show was a huge selling point for them for me. Shows on mainstream television don't promote adoption for couples that could have otherwise had a child biologically. I wish more would and it made me absurdly happy that it's part of their story. Being that Jacob _was_ adopted in this AU, he's seen both sides of the tracks, as it were.

Next time - Jacob and Red have a _chat_ about boundaries, Red gives them their first blacklister as a team, and a certain Agent Mojtabai finds something odd in the footage he's going over on Liz's case.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Four**

He hadn't thought he was particularly out of shape. Even after his injuries he had remained active, even if not _quite_ as active as before. Now, though, running through their tests, Jacob really wasn't sure he would pass them. He had told Liz that he would probably fail, but they had both known that he was lying to himself. He never set out to do something if he wasn't going to put his everything into it.

Jacob coughed hard, the muscles in his back burning and tightening to the point where he had to slow the run to a jog on the treadmill, his hand going to the offending muscle and trying to work the kink out. It had never been one-hundred percent after everything. If he were honest with himself, few things had been.

"If you don't mind me asking, why now?" the doctor asked, leaning back against a set of cabinets and reviewing Jacob's charts.

"Why now what?" the agent managed between trying to keep the air flowing through his lungs.

"Why go through your medical evaluation? You were cleared to take the test again over a year ago."

"Yeah, well, I hadn't planned on ever taking it. I guess things change." He stopped, sliding off of the treadmill and wincing, his back spasming too badly to keep going. They'd been at this for nearly four hours straight with only a couple of brief breaks.

The doctor flipped through his chart. "Your recovery took nearly a year. Two surgeries, one you opted out of… Looks like you may be feeling that now."

"They said the muscle was pretty much screwed up for life with the way that the bullet tore through it. No reason to waste time with something that probably wasn't going to work anyway," he answered. "Listen, how much more of this am I going to have to do?"

"That about wraps it up for today. I'll have the reports for Assistant Director Cooper by the end of tomorrow."

"Did I pass?"

The doctor leveled a look at him. "I'll have those reports for him by the end of tomorrow with my evaluation. It will be up to him if he lets you into the field or not."

Jacob resisted the urge to roll his eye as he grabbed his jacket and walked out without another word. He didn't have to go into the Post Office that day, but before everything got rolling he needed to lay down some ground rules. Namely that Raymond Reddington was not welcome in his home. Ever.

It took Ressler coming down to get him into the facility since he hadn't been formally cleared for it, and when the fair haired agent showed up with an irritable look on his features Jacob knew this was going to be the longest day off he'd ever had. "I need to talk to Cooper. Is he in?"

Ressler quirked an eyebrow. "Decide to resign afterall?"

"No, but the medical might do it for me. I didn't realize how out of shape I am."

"Seriously?" Ressler asked, glancing over at him. "Because last I checked, you can still run for a couple miles before you even break a sweat."

"Yeah, but that's jogging, not sprinting. And everything else."

Ressler rolled his eyes. "Cooper doesn't have the last pages of the paperwork yet, so I don't know why you-"

"Yeah, it's not about the paperwork."

"Any reason you're not telling me what it _is_ about?" Ressler groused.

Jacob turned, ready to tell him what happened, when he caught sight of a man he'd hardly thought would be given free roam of the blacksite. He blinked hard, making sure that he wasn't imagining things, and strode past his friend. He heard Ressler say something behind him, but didn't pay attention as he kept moving forward, his entire focused zeroed in.

"Ah, Agent Phelps, so good to-"

Reddington didn't even flinch back. He didn't have time to as Jacob's balled fist connected with his jaw and the older man went stumbling backwards.

"Jake!" Ressler growled out and had ahold of him before Jacob could pin the man down and continue after him. One hit. That's all he got. Good thing he'd made sure it was a good one. If he hadn't been so close to the wall he would have hit the floor, but instead Reddington was left leaning against it, a little dazed.

The criminal reached to his jaw, fingers probing it experimentally. "Well," he said carefully, "I suppose you believe I deserved that."

"Just a reminder to stay out of my home, you son of a bitch," Jacob growled as Ressler halfway hauled him back.

At the words, though, his friend nearly dropped him. " _What_?"

"He showed up at my home Thursday night after everything." Jacob's eyes narrowed at the man who was still leaned up against the wall.

"But you've decided to join the task force," Reddington said, his voice more cheerful than before. "Good. Then we can get started."

"He hasn't been medically cleared yet," Ressler pointed out.

"Oh, just a small detail. I'm sure there won't be any problem there. When he needs to be, Agent Phelps is quite capable of whatever he puts his mind to."

That smug smile made Jacob want to punch him again. "Including putting you down," he growled.

"I'm sure you might be willing to try, but you should keep in mind that there is a bigger picture at play here. Think of all the innocent lives you can save." The last was said with just a hint of sarcasm, and Jacob felt his jaw clench irritably. Reddington's smile broadened at his expression. "Smile, Jacob. This is going to be a gas. I have a name for your little team."

"A name?" Ressler asked.

"Yes, the next one on the blacklist. Now that everyone's here, I think it's time we got started."

* * *

Ressler had heard that they would be seeing some new faces on their team. Two would belong to Reddington and he'd gotten files on them, but hadn't met them until that point. Luli Zeng and Dembe, both with histories intertwined with Reddington's. There was a third unfamiliar face, one that must have belonged to the CIA laisant that he'd been told about.

"Meera Malik," she greeted, her accent somewhere out of England rather than American.

"Agents Ressler and Phelps," Cooper said, nodding to each of them. He glanced over to Reddington, eying the evidence of Jacob's temper. "What happened to you?"

"Reddington and I had a conversation about boundaries," Jacob cut in and Ressler resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Tyler Rathmond."

All eyes turned to the FBI's newest confidential informant.

"You know where he is?" Meera asked, intrigued. "He's been off of both the FBI and the CIA's radar for the last year."

"Yes, he certainly scrambled to ground after the full force of the United States government came down on him after he took off with those weapons," Reddington acknowledged. "I know where he's hiding and the alias he's living under."

"And you'll just hand this to us?" Jacob asked skeptically.

"Good heavens no. I expect you to go after the forger that created his alias. That is the real person you're after."

"And why should we go after this guy for you?"

Ressler watched the silent struggle between his partner and Reddington, Jacob's face unreadable as a condescending smile spread across Reddington's features. "Because I need a name and you people enjoy locking up those that break the law. Everyone wins."

"Ressler, you'll take Agent Malik and follow the Rathmond lead."

"Yes sir."

"And what? I just sit here and twiddle my thumbs?" Jacob snapped irritably.

"You're not cleared for field duty."

"I'm just-"

"Jake," Ressler cut him off, "I'll need another set of eyes on the information as soon as it comes in. Until then, go home. Liz needs you after everything that happened."

He watched the other man's jaw clenched as he weighed the argument. "Fine. Loop me in when you have something."

"Will do," Ressler promised.

* * *

Just a few days before Jacob had had steady ground to stand on. His desk job might have bored him beyond words, but he enjoyed the lectures that he taught. He and Liz had even been in the earliest stages of thinking about how they could balance her job at Georgetown if he took on teaching full time at Quantico. Then Reddington had come barreling back into his life and his steady ground had been shaken. Liz's support made it manageable, but he hated this limbo in between. The sooner he started with this, the sooner they could wrap it up and he could get his life back.

"Agent Phelps?"

Jacob paused nearly to the exit when a tech called his name. He turned. "What?"

The other man visibly winced at the tone. "I, uh, I was going over some video evidence in your wife's case, and something in her story doesn't match up. I was going to see if you had an idea about the discrepancy or-"

"Listen, Agent…?"

"Mojtabai. Aram."

Jacob nodded. "Agent Mojtabai, my wife teaches psychology at Georgetown. This isn't exactly her world, so the fact that she was a little freaked out isn't that surprising."

"I understand that, but they asked me to compare the statement to the video evidence."

"Right. Sure. I'll take a look," Jacob answered reluctantly.

Liz had told them that Isaacs had killed his people - tying up loose ends, from the sounds of it - and had been ready to shoot her when they had busted in. She'd been hiding and he didn't have time to search. They had pulled a nearby video feed in hopes of seeing where he'd exited and see if anyone else was with him. Reddington had told Jacob he had killed the kidnapper, but the body still hadn't been found, and until it was it was an open case.

"We caught him coming out here," Aram said, showing Jacob the feed. "The strange thing is this."

He zoomed in and cleared the image as best as it would allow him to. "Looks like he had his ass kicked," Jacob mused.

"I'm just trying to get the match up. She never told us anything about-"

"What are you saying? You think my wife kicked Isaac's ass?" Jacob chuckled and Aram looked a little embarrassed.

"She didn't exactly strike me as the type."

"She's not. Listen, I'm heading home, so I'll confirm it with her and let you know."

"I'm sure it's just something she forgot to mention," Aram said quickly and Jacob smirked.

"Makes sense. Have you mentioned it to anyone else?"

"No, I thought I'd bring it up to you in case I was missing something."

"Thanks." Jacob straightened. "I'll be in tomorrow." He started back towards the exit, the image pulling at him still. It was stupid. His wife wasn't some agent with training. She'd never even taken a self defense class. There was a reasonable explanation for it, and he'd hear it when he got home.

* * *

Liz dropped her bag on the floor just inside of the front door. Jacob had talked to her about taking time off, but she'd told him she wanted to stay busy and keep her mind off of it. Really it was the first day since everything had happened that she had had time away from him to follow up on her contacts. Isaacs was dead, so said the rumour, but for the life of her she couldn't get his killer's name. Even the people that she was certain knew suddenly shut down on their information, as if they were more afraid of the killer than they could ever be of her.

A pair of keys were already resting in the key bowl by the entrance, alerting her that her husband was already home. "Jacob?" she called, but didn't receive an answer. She pulled in a deep, steadying breath before starting up the stairs, met by a sleepy Hudson halfway up. She could hear the sound of the shower running and slipped her jacket from her shoulders, tossing it towards the bed. She peeked into the bathroom directly opposite of their bedroom and saw the figure of her husband standing under the steady stream of water, steam filling the room.

He wasn't moving, just standing with his head tilted back. "Babe?" she called, doing her best not to startle him. He jumped anyway and peeked out from behind the shower curtain.

"Hey, Liz. How was work?"

"Not bad. Rumours spread fast enough that I got all the great questions." He offered her a tired smile and he looked like he was in pain. "How was the medical exam?"

He shrugged, ducking back in. "Won't know the results until tomorrow."

"How are you feeling?"

He sighed, reaching over and shutting the water off. Liz handed him a towel and he stepped out with it around his waist. Her gaze shifted down to the scars Reddington's people had left on him. She had come so close to losing him then, and now she was risking it all over again. She found herself _wanting_ him to fail the medical exam. It seemed like the best case scenario. He would stay in the FBI and would remain out of the field. Things could return to normal.

"It's going to be okay," Jacob said, following her gaze.

"I know."

He leaned down to kiss her and she wrapped her arms around his middle, not missing the way he tensed when she got close to the muscle torn in his back. "Why don't you go lay down and I can try to work on it?" she offered, pulling a smile from him.

"Have I mentioned how much I love you recently?"

"Well, it _has_ been since this morning," she teased and they moved into the bedroom. He dug for his boxers and slipped into a pair of sleeping pants before laying out across the bed. Liz climbed up next to him, her hands against his back and fingers slowly working against the knotted muscles. She felt him relax and was half convinced he'd drifted off to sleep when he spoke softly.

"Hey? One of the guys going over the footage we recovered from the place Isaacs took you was asking about something he found."

"I didn't know that there _was_ footage," Liz said carefully, feeling him tense as hit just the wrong place. "Sorry."

"You're okay," he answered. "Yeah. It was from a building close by. Caught him exiting. Looked like someone roughed him up."

"I think I may have caught him in the nose when he took me," she answered him.

"Makes sense. Ease up would you?"

She felt relief sweep through her as he accepted the answer. Carefully she leaned over and pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades. "Sorry," she said again and he rolled over, those blue eyes of his catching her gaze. They were slightly unfocused, like he'd already taken out his contacts, and he leaned up and she met him halfway for the kiss.

"So, I picked up everything for spaghetti if you want it."

"I should be cooking for you after today."

He chuckled. "Why would you want to punish me?"

She laughed and kissed his nose. "Spaghetti is perfect. I'll take Hudson out while you get started."

Jacob rolled off the bed, reaching for a t-shirt and Liz watched him. Things had run so smoothly for over two years, and then _he_ had to come crashing into it, disrupting everything. She didn't like these turn of events, and she could almost feel the control slipping from her fingers. Reddington was taking it from her, and he was ruining everything.

* * *

They had picked up Rathmond, just as he had expected to. He was in holding less than twenty-four hours after Reddington had given them the name. They had their gunrunner, now they could get the name of his forger. He was starting to think that he'd made the right decision encouraging this little task force.

Cooper was still in his office when the Concierge of Crime strode in. In Reddington's experience, the first step to handling a situation efficiently was to not leave things to chance. The AD looked up, startled, and shut the file he had been looking at. "Reddington, I think perhaps we should set some ground rules for boundaries."

"You received Agent Phelps' medical records today."

"I did, and I'm hesitant."

Reddington stepped closer. This wouldn't do at all. Phelps was his best chance at getting closer to Elizabeth. "This team is reliant on a certain balance, Harold. I can guarantee that Agent Phelps is fully capable of compensating for any lingering health-"

"His health scores aren't what have me concerned. Those were fine."

"Then what?"

"You. Phelps is the one you seem determined should be here. Why?"

Reddington lifted his chin, studying the other man. "He has his uses."

"And your men nearly killed him the last time he was cleared to be in the field."

"If I wasn't clear before, perhaps I should say it again. Without Phelps there is no team and there is no list. Our deal falls apart and I walk."

Cooper straightened his back and folded his hands on his desk. "Agent Phelps is not someone that I would have picked for this, but he's here and it's time _I_ make something clear, Reddington. This is not your team. This is _my_ team, and Jacob Phelps is under my protection because of that. If you have-"

"Goodness, Harold. Do you think I intend to _hurt_ Agent Phelps?"

"I don't know what you have planned," Cooper said seriously.

Reddington allowed a smile to stretch his lips. "Nothing so nefarious, I assure you."

"Good, because if your goal is to hurt any of my agents, a bruised jaw will be the least of your worries."

They watched each other for a moment, neither willing to give. Finally, Reddington cracked a smile and shrugged. "Of course. Have a good night, Agent Cooper. Give the wife my best." He didn't wait to see if there was more. He would never admit it to him, but Cooper's loyalty to his people deserved respect. The man was in an awkward place, expected to balance a potentially dangerous situation and try to turn it in the FBI's favour. Red would give him enough to make it worth it for them. It would be worth it if it got him closer to Elizabeth.

* * *

TBC

Notes: One of my favourite things so far in writing this story has been to look at the changing of the relationships. I want the Tessler bromance so badly in the show (so so badly), but if it happens at all, it looks like it's going to have to wait until at least the latter half of the season. I'm definitely channeling it in here though lol. And Cooper. I've grown so much fonder of Cooper over last season and this. I didn't' have anything against him, mind you, just that I wasn't quite as fond of him. It's so nice to mix thigns up in here.

As always, I'd love to hear from you on this. Every one of your reviews makes me smile like a crazy person and want to write more :)

Next time - The task force goes after the Forger, Reddington brokers deals, and Liz feels the perfect world she's lived in start to shake around her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Five.**

"Well, babe, I can't give you an exact time that I can get away."

Ressler glanced over to his partner in the passenger seat who had his phone to his ear, his expression blank except for a hint of frustration in his eyes and the carefully patient sound of his voice.

"I know that we told her we'd set the meeting this week, but it's not like we exactly planned for this… Let me see where we are on this case today, please? It'll give me a better idea where I stand and I won't have to cancel last second. That's all… Liz, listen to me, that's all I'm saying." There was another pause and Ressler saw him wince visibly from the corner of his eye. "I know this is important, Lizzie. It's important to me too. You _know_ that."

They pulled up with the other FBI vehicles that were already on location and Ressler killed the engine, motioning to Jacob to wrap it up. He didn't envy the conversation. While he was sure that the younger man had called Liz to tell her he was officially cleared for the task force from medical, it wasn't something that she was going to be thrilled about.

"Babe, I'll be home for dinner, okay? Yes, I remember that they're coming over. I'll be there. I have to go. I love you."

Ressler grimaced a little as his friend ended the call, looking frustrated. "Everything okay?"

"Can I just kill Reddington? It'll solve all my problems."

"That's probably not the best course of action."

"Damn."

They stepped out of the car, the conversation put away. Ressler had learned years ago not to push Jacob on subjects that he didn't volunteer information about - which was funny, because Jacob seemed to have never learned that, especially when it came to Ressler, whose buttons he pushed on a regular basis - and if the younger man needed to vent, he would. Otherwise the Phelps' would handle their own domestic issues and Ressler and Jacob would handle tossing the bad guys in jail.

"The intel that Rathmond provided says that the Forger is running his operation out of that building, top floor on the northern side," Meera said as they joined the men and women ready to help their task force storm the building.

"Any security?" Ressler asked.

"Cameras, but we're out of range at the moment. We have men ready to cover all exits to keep anyone from slipping out."

"We still don't have a visual on this guy?" Jacob asked, blue gaze drifting up to the four story building that Meera had pointed to.

"Rathmond described him as slight build, blonde, and fair-skinned. Supposedly he keeps armed guards on site."

"And we trust him?"

Jacob snorted to Ressler's side and Ressler rolled his eyes, looking back at Meera and waiting for her answer.

"I'm with Agent Phelps. No, I don't. The man's hoping for a way out and trying to play all the angles. Badly."

"Well, we can use his desperation to get what we need out of him," Jacob answered nonchalantly. "I'll take the team around the south stairwell and you take the north?"

"Would we go at it any other way?" Ressler asked with a half smirk and motioned around to the team that would be with him. He looked back at Meera. "Sorry, we kind of have a system."

The CIA agent shrugged, looking entirely unruffled by the assumption and she offered him a calm, thin smile. "Someone has to watch the doors."

Ressler didn't miss the quick shift in Jacob's gaze between he and Meera and he resisted the urge to shake his head. "Let's bring this guy in. Jake, try to leave him in one piece?"

"If they're shooting at me, I shoot back. That's a rule of mine."

"We do prefer them to be conscious to question them, you know."

" _Now_ you tell me."

Ressler gave in and shook his head at the other man, drawing a grin from him as they started in opposite directions. They had three men with them each, totalling eight agents to storm the building. Meera's team would cover the exits. If they did this right, they would have this forger in custody well within the hour.

They took the stairs, footsteps as quiet as they could be on the hard linoleum tiles. They reached the top and Ressler led them through into the hallway, Jacob's team paused halfway down the other side. The two men made eye contact and Ressler led his team into the door that was supposed to be the front for the forger, shouting _FBI_ as he did.

The office was mostly empty, with the exception of a desk with a laptop hooked to a monitor and a blonde woman sitting wide-eyed on the other side of it. She looked terrified at the sight of federal agents and Ressler cursed what looked like it could very easily have been bad intel. He motioned for the woman to stay where she was while his men checked the remainder of the office to make sure they were alone. Jacob walked in behind him. "Yeah, you know, she looks really dangerous, Donnie."

"Shut up," he snapped, the nickname always sounding more condescending coming from Jacob than it did anyone else.

The other man shrugged. "No way to know." He put a finger to his ear, listening to the small comm. "Mojtabai is on his way up for the computers."

Ressler turned back to the woman. "Agent Donald Ressler with the FBI. We're looking for a man in connection with a case. Slender build, fair-"

"Mr Reiley?" she asked. "Matt Reiley is my boss. He's been in New York all week. Is he in some kind of trouble?"

"Could you tell me the nature of Mr Reiley's business, Miss..?"

"Ashley Taylor. Mr Reiley is really very particular about his business. I can't just let you guys go through things, even if you are FBI. He'll fire me."

Ressler reached into his pocket and pulled the warrant as Aram came in, looking a little nervous to be out in the field. The lead agent watched as Ashley Taylor took the warrant from him and stepped back reluctantly. "I don't understand," she said. "Mr Reiley runs a real estate business. I'm not sure what he would be in trouble for."

"No one said he's in trouble," Jacob said easily.

"Well, federal agents swoop in and demand to see all of my boss' files and that's the assumption I make," she answered a little irritably.

"Found something," Aran announced and Jacob let out a low whistle.

"Damn he _is_ fast."

"Well, I think it's something," the technician amended. "Encrypted files stored on the server. They were tucked away."

"Can you open them?" Ressler asked the woman that they had all but descended on.

She moved around, her heels clicking as she moved to look at the computer, and she bent over Aram's shoulder to look. "I've never seen these before."

"Isn't it your computer?" Jacob asked.

"Mr Reiley has access to it."

"I'll need to take it back to the Post Office to get to these files, but I should be able to get in."

"Do it," Ressler said and looked over to Ashley Taylor. "We'll have a few more questions for you, ma'am."

"Am I under arrest?"

"No, not at this moment. We'll just have some questions about your boss and the company."

She nodded slowly. "Anything I can do to help."

* * *

They were in a holding pattern until Aram got into the files. It was a pain for the case, but kept Jacob out of slipping steadily closer to finding himself on the couch after the phone conversation with his wife that morning. He pushed the door open, groceries in hand, and was met almost immediately by a bouncing dog trying to take his feet out from under him.

"Someone missed you today," Liz's voice drifted from around the corner. "I didn't get that welcome when I got home."

Jacob felt a real smile perk his lips at the sight of the woman he loved, dressed down from her usual business attire she wore to her lectures. He was pretty sure that the sweater she wore was oversized because it was actually his, but he had to admit she looked better in it. The smile she wore didn't hurt either. "Hey, babe."

"Hey," she greeted back and crossed the space between them, taking one of the bags from him. "Your parents are already here, but I just wanted to tell you something before we go in."

"Yeah?"

"I went in and spoke to the social worker between classes today. It's not official, but they think they've found a match. She wanted to know if we could both come in Friday."

Slowly the news sunk in and Jacob's smile turned to a grin as he dropped the bag in his hand and picked Liz fully up off the ground. She laughed as she returned the hug, her own bag joining his in the ground so she could wrap her arms around him. "We did it," he breathed, kissing the side of her head.

"We're going to have a baby," she whispered, her laugh easing his nerves. "I love you. I'm sorry I snapped."

"Me too," he murmured, setting her back on the ground.

"Good news?"

Jacob turned to find Kelly peeking around the doorframe. She looked like she suspected already, but Liz wouldn't have spilled the news without him there. "We're going to be parents," he announced and couldn't quite contain his grin.

"And to think you used to tell me that you had no interest in a family," Kelly teased, turning back into the dining room to head into the kitchen.

Bruce was sitting at the table and offered him a wave. "And you told him he just had to meet the right one. He's heard that before, Kelly," he sighed and Liz laughed at Jacob's side. "Watch out, kid, she'll be throwing you a baby shower next."

"Only if they want it."

"So I'm starving," Liz jumped in, "and _someone_ is convinced I can't cook, so…"

"By someone you mean everyone that's tasted your cooking?" Jacob teased, starting to unpack the grocery bags.

"Wow, thanks babe."

"You gave me food poisoning."

"Only once."

"And that's all it took." Jacob grinned. "You have a lot of talents, Lizzie, but the kitchen isn't one of them. You want to grab a bottle of wine?"

"We beat you to it," she smiled and poured him a glass.

Jacob took it after turning the oven on to preheat, his gaze sweeping over the room. Kelly had been right. This - the family, the home, everything that he held so dear now - hadn't been what he had expected in his life. He'd caught a lucky break when Kelly and Bruce Jones had taken him in, but they hadn't been able to fix everything. They tried, he knew, and they'd done him a lot of good, but Jacob knew that he didn't connect like others did. It was rare that someone made their way in, but when they did, when he finally felt that connection it seemed to be permanent. Liz was the only woman he'd ever loved and the fact that she loved him back was more than he would have ever expected, much less hoped that he could find.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, pulling his attention to it. He dug it out and frowned as he saw Ressler's number flashing across the screen.

"I've got it," Kelly said as he shot them an apologetic look.

"Thanks." He clicked the accept button and lifted it to his ear. "Phelps."

* * *

Liz watched as her husband stepped out of the room and around to where he'd dropped his bag when he entered. She leaned against the wall, gaze directed at Kelly who was chattering as she picked up her son's cooking duties, but she was listening to Jacob's conversation.

"Yeah, I've got it right here. Hold on a sec. Was she helpful at all?"

There was a pause and Liz took a sip of her wine as she heard his work laptop power on. It had been some time since he'd had to bring one home.

"I think we owe Aram a drink," Jacob chuckled. "So it's a full list? Partial? Well, if he got that much he'll get the rest."

Liz gave the appropriate nod to a question Bruce asked. She wasn't sure what list Jacob was talking about, but she strained to listen for clues.

"Do we have anything to hold Taylor overnight for?"

She froze. No, that was just paranoia. He'd mentioned something about an arms dealer, not a forger. Unless Reddington knew who she was. He _had_ shown up in their home, and it wouldn't be beyond the Concierge of Crime to have decided to use the FBI to track down the operative used to track _him_ down. She would have to reach out to her contacts very quietly to make sure that things were still in order.

"Got it. I'll be in early tomorrow to go over it."

The call ended and Liz pulled her full attention around to Kelly as her husband re-entered. "Friday should be good," he said as he moved into the kitchen. "Looks like this case should be at a place I can step away by then."

"Great," Liz answered, her voice steady. "You going to catch your guy?"

"Hope so," her husband answered.

He rejoined the conversation like nothing was wrong, and for him it wasn't. Liz couldn't seem to shake the feeling that Reddington had put yet another block in her path. If he was closing in, things wouldn't remain calm for long. She would contact the Forger. Even if that wasn't who the FBI was tracking down, it was time for Liz to put a contingency plan into motion should she need it.

* * *

"Everything is under control. Nothing of any value to the company was compromised," Ashley Taylor said as she walked down the street, the cab having let her off about a block from where she walked, phone pressed to her ear and doing damage control from the sound of it. The streets were fairly empty at that time of the night and the FBI had told her to stay close should they have any further questions.

Taylor had just flipped the burner phone shut when a figure slipped out of the shadows and took it straight from her fingers. She turned, indignant. "How dare you?" she growled.

"Well that's hardly the response one would expect from a sweet thing that you pretend to be," Raymond Reddington said cheerfully as he approached from the opposite direction, glancing past her at Dembe who effectively was blocking her exit that way. "But, perhaps not from Alicia Marrow." His smile only broadened at her look of surprise. "You have quite the record, should a person know what name to look for."

"How-?"

"Oh, you're good, Ms Marrow. Good enough to build quite a business off of it and good enough to fool the FBI. That is, until I provided them with the trail that led to your real identity. They'll be swinging around to pick you up shortly, though not so soon that you can't slip from their fingers given the right exit strategy."

Her pale eyes narrowed. "I know who you are. What do you want from me?"

"Funny you should ask." He pulled a photo from the inside pocket of his jacket and handed it over. "I believe this young lady may be one of your clients. I need the name she gave you."

"And you'll get me out of here?"

"I will, and I should think it'll take no time at all for you to create a whole new persona to work under. You'll have to build your business back up, of course, but that shouldn't be too hard with your skillset."

"Not that you're giving me much of a choice," she growled.

"Not much," Reddington agreed. "Your client's name for your freedom."

"Rostova," the Forger said at last. "Masha Rostova."

Reddington felt all his breath leave him at once. "You're certain?"

"I am."

"Thank you. Dembe will escort you to the plane and you will provide any additional information you have on Ms Rostova to him."

He watched them leave, gaze lingering even after they were gone. The name had been unexpected. Very unexpected, and there was no way that it was a coincidence. Elizabeth knew more than he had expected and it only left him with more questions.

A frustrated sigh escaped him as he pulled a second photo from his jacket, this one worn and frayed at the corners from handling over the years. "What happened to you?" he murmured to the little girl with large blue eyes sitting on her mother's lap on a swing. She didn't answer him, and he was fairly certain that the woman that she had grown into would fight him tooth and nail until she understood. He had been a fool to hope that perhaps she had landed in a home with a family that had loved her, cared for her, and had married a man that had been part of the team sent to track him down by chance. No, Elizabeth certainly had ulterior motives, that much he was quite certain of now. If she cared about the man that had been willing to marry or not, Red wasn't sure, but that didn't matter. As determined as Phelps had always proven to be, he didn't stand a chance against what was coming. It would roll over them all, crushing them beneath it. Reddington's only chance was to get to Elizabeth before that happened and get her to safety. After everything, he had to.

* * *

Jacob was already asleep when she crept down the stairs that night and pulled back the carpet on the floor in the dining room. A small box lay tucked away there, the wood smooth and it would have hardly looked inconspicuous if it hadn't been hidden away in the floor. She pulled it out, glancing over towards the stairs and listening hard for any movement above. When she was sure that she heard none she tugged the lid open and took the passports from it before putting it away again.

The night air was chilled as Liz stepped out, pulling her thin sweater a little tighter around her shoulders, and she'd never been more pleased that they had bought the little fire pit that sat out on their patio. She tossed the ID's into the pit and lit it up, settling back into one of the chairs to watch them burn. She hadn't been able to reach the Forger and while Elizabeth Scott hadn't been an alias she had built through the woman, she'd used her skills for plenty of others, and she'd be damned if she let anything lead back to her.

"What are you doing out here, babe?"

Liz jumped a little, not having heard her husband's soft footsteps. "I had a nightmare and didn't want to wake you up."

"Kind of chilly to sit out here, isn't it?" he asked, padding out to join her.

"And that's why we have the fire pit."

He hummed softly to himself, joining her and she did her best not to look uncomfortable. It was dark and he had no reason to suspect that she was burning anything in it. "Were you dreaming about the fire again?" he asked.

Liz nodded. She didn't dream often, but when she did it was often about a room on fire. She had no idea what it meant or where it came from, but Jacob was always there to wrap his arms around her and help push it away. A small pang of guilt pulled at her for using that to excuse herself from their bed at three in the morning. "I didn't want to wake you up."

Jacob reached out, taking her hand in his. "Wake me up any time, Liz," he said softly. "I've got enough of them, you know."

She pulled in a deep breath and stood, moving to sit in his lap and curl up against him. Jacob wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight. "I love you," she whispered and she could feel his fingers slowly working their way through her tangled hair in a soothing fashion.

"Love you too. You want to go inside?"

"No," she breathed. "Could we stay out here for a little bit?"

"Yeah," he answered softly, kissing the side of her head. "As long as you need, babe."

Liz nodded against him, closing her eyes and forcing herself to relax. She had to lie to him to protect him, she reminded herself. It was the only way he wouldn't get hurt in all of this. When it had come to that, she wasn't sure, but it had, and there was no coming back from it now.

* * *

TBC

Notes: So, wow. That Winter Finale last night. I've heard such mixed reviews from it, but I loved it so much. The action, the emotional drama... And we _finally_ got at least a piece of Ressler's past. It's so exciting! I'm going to have a hard time waiting... what? Six weeks? Something around that? At least it's not as long as last year's.....

So, I'd like to say a huge thank you to everyone that's reviewed and that's reading this. The response across the various places I'm posting it has been awesome! I get the impression that I have readers from all three major ships which makes me absurdly excited. I hope that means that I'm representing the main cast well and giving them all enough screen time, as it were. I'm really having so much fun with this and always love your feedback on it. One of my favourite scenes that I've written so far for the story is in this chapter. I almost forgot to add it in, but checked my plot points and went back and wrote it, and it fit so well and paralleled so nicely with some of the internal struggles I think were happening in canon.

Thanks again. You guys are amazing!

Next time - Reddington delivers the next name on the Blacklist to the task force: Gina Zanetakos, a corporate terrorist who has been killing off her employer's competition.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Six**

"Staring at those names isn't going to make one magically make sense."

Jacob looked up from his desk, eyes taking a moment to focus through his contacts. "I guess I just expected to get more out of this case."

"You and me both," Ressler acknowledged. "We've been able to piece a couple of useful names together though. It's a start. That list is going to be a long game sort of win. I know how much you love those."

Jacob rolled his eyes and his partner chuckled. He didn't want to admit that the reason he was focused on this one was because it had been the only case handed to them so far that had not produced fairly immediate results. Reddington had provided them with several blacklisters, as he called them, that they had arrested. He was proving himself to be a wealth of information, which meant he'd be sticking around, much to Jacob's irritation. He supposed it was time to get used to it. At least Reddington hadn't shown back up at his home.

"Unless you're looking at something really pressing, we have a new case."

That caught his attention. "Anything interesting?"

"How did you survive desk duty?" Ressler asked with a smirk.

"I was perpetually bored but fought with Liz a whole lot less."

Ressler shrugged. "I'm not exactly one to say anything about what this job can do to your family life."

"You said it not me," Jacob grumbled as they moved into the bullpen, Cooper and Meera were already standing there with Reddington and looking over several photos pinned to the board. Blue eyes glanced over them, seeing several faces that he recognized from the news. They were all dead, but as far as Jacob was aware, none of their deaths were open homicides.

"So good of you to join us, gentleman," Reddington said flippantly. "How goes the adoption, Agent Phelps?"

"The adoption is none of your business," Jacob snapped in return.

Meera, though, quirked an eyebrow. "I wasn't aware you and Liz were adopting. Congratulations."

"Thanks. Could we focus on the case?"

Reddington chuckled. "Agent Phelps here is still under the impression that I wish some personal harm in him and-"

"And would prefer you stay out of my personal life," Jacob cut him off. "The case."

Reddington smirked as if he knew that he'd gotten under Jacob's skin. "The last couple of names I've given you have gotten you what you wanted. Arrests have been made and you have all patted yourselves on the back. Congratulations. What would you say if I told you that I could deliver a terrorist to you?"

"I'd say that that is what you are here for," Cooper groused and Reddington's smile didn't waver.

"I'm here because you people entertain me. You're like my hobby." He glanced over to where Aram was sitting behind a computer screen. "Agent Mojtabai, could I bother you to look up an individual for me? Shubie Hartwell. Her documents will read that she's an American citizen."

Aram looked over to Cooper first before quickly pulling up the woman's passport information so that it showed on the large screen overhead. Blonde, dark eyes, attractive, and she didn't look like a threat. Something Jacob had learned over the years was how little that meant. "What about her?"

"This woman's real name is Gina Zanetakos. A native of Moscow she has traveled along a particularly interesting life path that had made her into one of the most talented corporate terrorists you'll ever come across. She isn't on your radar, but she should be. She has been hired out by Onamia Inc., a shelf corporation meant to provide cover for a particularly nasty individual that has been behind the murders of three CEO's in the past two and a half years, their newest victim having passed just yesterday right here in DC."

"And does this individual hiring Zanetakos out to commit murders have a name?" Ressler asked.

"I'm quite sure that they do, but I can't do all the work for you, Donald." Reddington's gaze flicker over to Aram again. "If you could put the articles about the passing of Charlie DuPont, Claire Zhou, and Miles Johnston up on the screen? I would think they'd be fairly easy to find."

Jacob's gaze followed the movement on the screen, Zanetakos' picture replaced by three leading articles about the three noted CEO's. DuPont, founder and CEO of a medical research company, had been the first to go, followed by Johnston, and finally by Zhou just the day before, as Reddington had said. All three had died by what appeared natural causes at first glance, or at least the newspapers seemed to think so.

"Gina Zanetakos poisoned every one of these people," Reddington continued. "There was something that her employer needed either in their companies. Each one, Zanetakos has been set on personally, and more will follow if she's given the chance."

"It's worth looking into," Cooper said thoughtfully. "Aram, dig up as much information about the people as you can. I want to know their professional lives, their private lives, any enemies that they share, and anything else you can find to link the three together. You three will need to split up the companies. Each choose one and go. Let's find this woman, people."

* * *

Jacob had no reason to complain. The companies were spread out along the East Coast and he'd gotten the one in Maryland, thanks to Ressler being determined not to tick off Liz any more than he already had. Apparently she was more intimidating than her husband was, not that he could really deny that. He preferred to remain on his wife's good side as well.

His gaze swept across the foyer as he stepped in. People were moving in every direction and even if they'd just lost the head of their company the day before that didn't seem to slow the business down. Jacob crossed the open space, aiming for the receptionists desk, and she held up a finger signaling that he'd have to wait until her call was done. His patience only lasted so long before he pulled his badge out of the inside of his coat pocket and placed it on the desk for her to see. The receptionist's dark eyes widened. "I'm going to have to call you back," she stammered and looked up, finally looking directly at Jacob. "Hello. I'm sorry. May I help you?"

He flashed her one of his more charming smiles. "Hi. I'm Special Agent Jacob Phelps. I need to speak to someone in your company that has some information on the passing of Claire Zhou. Could you point me in the right direction?"

She was staring at him like she'd barely heard what he'd said. "I, um, what does the-" she looked closely at the badge, reading the agency name in it- "FBI have to do with Ms Zhou's death?"

"Maybe nothing. We received a tip that we're following up on linked to the company. I just need whoever would have the most information about her here. A business partner or-"

"You'll probably want to talk to Beth. She was Ms Zhou's PA and is coordinating everything. I'll let her know you're here."

Jacob nodded and tucked his badge back into his pocket, stepping away to give the young lady a chance to call the person she needed to. After a moment she hung the phone up and stood. "I can take you back there."

He nodded, pulling in a deep breath and getting into the headspace he needed to handle the situation. Sympathy was not something that came easily to him, but he could fake it with the best of them when needed. It was a talent he'd learned fairly young, and one that had become useful in his job.

A young woman in business suit turned when they entered through a secured door and she thanked the employee she'd been speaking with. The space was open, people sitting around at tables and in half cubicles, but one face caught his attention. He couldn't tell for sure, because unlike the photo Aram had pulled up of Shubie Hartwell, the woman had dark hair, nearly black, a little wavy and long. His attention was taken away from her before he could get a good look.

"Agent Phelps?"

Jacob turned his attentions to her, seeing the woman stand from her desk from the corner of his eye, pulling a jumpdrive from the computer and shutting the lid.

"The woman with the long dark hair, what name did she give you when she came to work here?"

Beth blinked, Jacob's abrupt question throwing her. "Monica? Monica Evans."

"How long has she been here?"

"With the company? About two weeks. She's a contract worker. Is she in some sort of trouble?"

"I just need to ask her a couple of questions." He didn't wait to be told no, he just followed, already behind. He heard a door shut hard at the other end of the hall and took off in a sprint, plowing the sound down to a stairwell where he saw the top of her head as she made her way down.

Jacob took the stairs two at a time, racing down after her. When she reached the bottom she looked up, a smirk playing across her expression before she shot out the door, sending the fire alarms blaring. He didn't wait, instead took off after her, following her out the door and into the alleyway where he just barely missed the blow aimed for him as he rounded the corner.

She had lost the wig, thick dark blonde hair pulled up tightly so that it wouldn't slip out. She popped back, that smirk still on her lips as she dodged a blow aimed at her and returned one in same. "Not just a handsome face after all," she murmured thoughtfully.

Jacob snorted and moved quickly to his left, catching only part of the blow she was aiming at him and swinging around and shoved her hard against the brick wall. "Gina Zanetakos," he greeted with a small smirk of his own. "You're going to need to come with me."

"I don't think so," she answered and slammed her head forward into his.

Jacob saw stars, losing his grip on her and she kicked him hard in the middle, sending him stumbling back and hard to the ground. He managed to roll just as she tried to land a second kick, but didn't make it to his feet before her boot slammed into his back, sending him crashing back down.

"Don't worry, handsome," Zanetakos chuckled, "you're better than most agents I've gone up against, but the FBI just doesn't train you like my people do."

Jacob didn't have a chance to even try to get back up before the next blow sunk him into darkness.

* * *

Monica Evans and Shubie Hartwell were just the tip of the iceberg. Jacob had called him with his lead - conveniently leaving out the part about losing her because he'd been out cold, that hadn't come until Ressler had actually seen him and asked about the nasty gash on his temple - and Ressler had found Molly Davison had looked a great deal like the photo he showed the people at DuPont's company and Meera had found she was at Johnston's as well, under the name Tanya Mathis. All temporary positions, all allowing her close access to the CEO's. When the stories were compared, more similarities started surfacing. Each one of them fell ill with something like a severe flu, pulling their health down over the course of several days before they passed. DuPont's heart had given way, Johnston's body had simply given out under the pressure, and they were still waiting for the newly ordered autopsy for Zhou. The link, just like Reddington had said, was Zanetakos.

They had found the apartment she was renting out not far from Zhou's company and found it in perfect condition, looking very much like Zanetakos hadn't made it back before the FBI had gotten there.

"We seem to be following one step behind this woman," Meera mused. "Finding something here would help."

Ressler snorted as he crouched down to look along the bookshelf. It was strange, she was here for a job that, if her history indicated, she would have wrapped up fairly quickly, yet the apartment was furnished as if someone had lived there and was planning to continue living there. How deeply did this woman sink into her role?

"So is Phelps in the doghouse?" Meera mused as she sorted through a box she had found.

Ressler looked up. "What do you mean?"

"He's not up here."

"Okay?" the other agent asked carefully and Meera laughed at him.

"You two have a system," she repeated his words from their first case together, "and suddenly he's downstairs when he loses the suspect." She leveled a look at him that the other agent couldn't quite identify. It was curious, but not openly so. "What's the story between the two of you?"

"Ask Jake and he wouldn't talk?" Ressler chuckled. "He does that. He'll talk your ear off about useless things, but you won't get a lot of personal information from him."

"You seem to know a bit."

"We've worked together a lot of years."

"You were both on the team sent after Reddington."

Ressler looked up, a rattling sound catching his attention. He pulled a chair over to step up on and open a vent. "Yeah." He pulled a box that had been tucked away in there out, smirking to himself. "Found her go-box."

"Do you know why Reddington was interested in bringing him in specifically?"

There it was. Ressler had been wondering what the interrogation was about. It wasn't often that Meera had a chance to speak with him without Jacob nearby. "Trust me, if we knew, both of us would be a lot more comfortable with it."

"Not even a theory?"

"The guy nearly killed Jake. No, it doesn't make sense that he was determined to have him on the team." He paused, lips thinning. "And no, he's not in the doghouse. Jacob's good, but he wasn't expecting her to be there. That's not his fault. I trust him. He's… honest when it counts," he chuckled, the words Jacob's that had been repeated over the years.

Meera smirked as she pulled a small envelope from the box, opening it to find photos of the victims of their case. "Look at this." Ressler took the evidence as she continued speaking. "This guy is grouped with the others that have already been killed, but he's not one of our vics."

"She'll be after him next."

The door to the apartment opened without warning, catching both agents by surprise, and Jacob came trudging in. He was walking a little gingerly and the bruises were more visible now, showing signs of the fight. "How're you feeling after getting your ass handed to you by a woman?" Meera asked cheerfully and Jacob rolled his eyes.

"This, Ress. _This_ is why I left it out," he grumbled.

"I don't see why I'm getting blamed," the older man answered. "I haven't given you hell over it."

"You don't have to. Meera's getting enough of a kick out of it."

Ressler snorted. "How are you feeling?"

"Like crap. What'd you find?"

"Her next target," Ressler answered as he handed the photos over.

"She may be arrogant enough to try to pull it off even though we have the information."

"What do you mean?" Meera asked, serious once more.

Jacob offered a shrug. "Something she said about training. Not sure. It was like she didn't have any question that she could beat me."

"Maybe you need to hit the gym a little harder now that you're back in the field," Ressler said with a smirk. "A couple years behind a desk making you a little slow?"

"You and I can go a couple rounds and we'll see," Jacob answered with a wicked grin.

Ressler rolled his eyes. It had been an exceptionally long day that wouldn't be done until they had gotten things boxed and into evidence. One glance over at his partner told him Jacob wasn't going to last well in it. "You got checked out, right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just bruised."

"Good. Go home."

"I just said-"

"Yeah, and I'm not blind. Go home, get some rest, and we'll start fresh tomorrow." Ressler shot him a look, daring him to argue again. He saw the taller man's shoulders slump a little in defeat.

"Call me if you need me."

"Will do."

He waited until Jacob was out of the apartment before turning to Meera. "I don't know about you, but I don't want to be far behind him."

She eyed the evidence surrounding them. "No complaints here."

* * *

She had forgotten how much she hated it when he was in the field. Part of her had hoped it would be different this time since it seemed like the majority of his cases were based around DC, but as Liz glanced over at the clock and out the window to see just how dark it had gotten outside, she was given a reminder.

A sigh escaped as she turned her attention back the the psychology paper she was grading. She really needed to bring on a student aid and make them do this.

Hudson stirred at her feet, sitting up and looking towards the door. He was up and on his way by the time it opened and a familiar voice greeted him. "Hey, buddy. Whatcha doing? You need a walk? You want to go for a walk?"

"Like he's going to tell you no," Liz called out, a smile tugging her lips as she stood. She rounded the corner to see her husband standing there, pizza box in hand and looking like he'd been in a brawl. "Babe, what happened?"

Jacob gave her a sheepish look. "I got my ass kicked by a girl."

Liz tried to keep a straight face. "Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah. Just sore. I figured it was better from me than Ress, but it still sounds pretty sad," he chuckled.

"Well, I've known you long enough to know you're not a pushover. She must have been pretty good too."

"Yeah," her husband murmured softly and Liz took the pizza from his hands, Hudson following it as if to say that he'd prefer a slice of that even to the offered walk. "But you're okay?"

"Everyone keeps asking me that," he chuckled as he leaned down to kiss her.

"Have you looked at yourself in a mirror since it happened?" she laughed in return, turning to start unloading their dinner for them.

Jacob offered her a thin smile and followed, Hudson whining at their feet. He moved behind her, wrapping his arms around her and leaning his chin on her shoulder. "So you've heard about my crazy day, how was yours?"

She stiffened a little in his arms and turned, one hand going to the side of his face. "You're warm."

"Am I?"

She reached her other hand up, pressing the back of her hand to his forehead and then both hands against the back of his neck. His eyes slipped closed and he leaned into her touch as she started to pull away. "You've been running nonstop since you agreed to join this task force. It was bound to catch up with you eventually."

"I'm fine, babe."

"Uhhuh. Sure."

He cracked a grin. "I am. Some food, a hot shower, and a real night's sleep, and I'll be good to go in the morning."

"If you're still not feeling well when you wake up, could you promise me to call in?"

"Lizzie, I can't-"

"Jacob." His name left her lips and she turned a pleading look up to him that he always had a time ignoring.

Her husband heaved a sigh. "Okay."

Liz smiled, kissing his lips quickly. "Okay. And don't you dare think you can get away with lying to me tomorrow morning and saying you feel okay if you don't."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"You forget, babe. I _know_ you."

His grin turned a little more real and he kissed her forehead.

A little over an hour later Liz was crawling into bed with him, not caring that she hadn't gotten nearly as far through her grading as she should have. Jacob was out nearly as soon as he laid down and she wrapped her arms around him from behind, pressing a kiss between his shoulder blades. "I love you," she whispered and received a mumbled affirmation of the same. It brought a real smile to her lips and she burrowed down with him, hoping that sleep really was all he needed.

* * *

TBC

Notes: The funny thing is that I think Meera is probably a bit of a badass in a fight as well. I mean, she's CIA, so I think she's the one getting the biggest kick over Jacob's trampled pride in this chapter lol

Next time - Gina turns out more dangerous than Jacob originally thought and Liz has to make a decision that could affect her cover.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Seven**

The phone woke him up and Jacob peeked out from under the covers of his bed. Liz hadn't had to remind him of his promise from the evening before when he'd spent half the night sick over the toilet and the other half shivering under piles of blankets. It had taken everything he had in him to convince her that she did not have to stay home with him. He wasn't an infant, and was perfectly capable of taking care of himself until she got home from work. It was a short day anyway and her last class should let out around one or so. She'd finally agreed to go if he promised to keep his cell nearby.

Now that same phone had woken him up, buzzing non-stop with someone that just wouldn't give up. He pulled it close enough that he could squint, reading a blocked number. Ressler knew he was sick. If the Post Office was calling, they could damn well do it from a number he could read. He slammed it back down and pulled the covers back up over his head.

Without warning Hudson, who had been snoozing on his feet at the end of the bed, jumped up and took off out of the bedroom and down the stairs. Even through the fog Jacob felt his instincts kick in and he pulled himself up as quickly as he dared without causing the room to lurch dangerously. He grabbed for his glasses before reaching to the drawer in the nightstand, pulling his gun from it. Carefully he stood and felt his stomach rebel. He'd really picked a hell of a time to get sick.

Jacob heard the sound of shoes against the wooden floors and he gripped his gun tightly in his right hand, using his left to balance himself as he inched down the stairs. He made it down and turned towards the hall, Hudson sounding like he was in the kitchen with whoever had come into his house.

He leveled his gun as he rounded the corner finding a man that he'd specifically told never to step foot in his home again knelt on the ground and petting his dog. "Traitor," Jacob grumbled at Hudson, lowering his gun before he shot the man and had to answer for it later.

Reddington looked up, expression saying he was ready with a snarky retort, but it died on his lips and his brows drew together. "Good heavens, you look like death warmed over."

"I hate you and get out of my house," Jacob rasped, motioning to the back door with his gun. "Now."

"They told me you'd called in sick, but I assumed that was an excuse."

"If I'm not at work, it's because something's wrong. I don't just make up excuses. Get out of my home." He needed to get him to leave before he made a run for the bathroom and threw up everything Liz had gotten him to eat before she left. His world was swaying dangerously around him and everything ached, but there was no reason Reddington needed to know that.

"Easy there," Reddington said calmly and somehow he'd crossed the space between them and put a steadying head on Jacob's arm, keeping him from listing too far off to his left. "Elizabeth left you like this?"

"She has a job too, you know. Not everyone spends their days selling government secrets to the highest bidder." He blinked hard, setting the firearm on the counter before he dropped it and it went off. "What's your obsession with my wife anyway?"

"You look as if you caught the raw end of a fight as well. Best I remember you're quite talented in hand to hand situations. Who on earth managed to leave all that on you?"

"I had a run in with Zanetakos yesterday. Now answer the question: what is your obsession with my wife?"

"Obsession?" Reddington echoed as if he'd just heard the question for the first time, and he reached over and pulled a chair closer. He motioned to it and Jacob didn't have much of a choice other than to sit. "I'm not sure I-"

"You know exactly what I mean."

The older man snorted, and after several beats of silence began to speak again, his voice low. "It's interesting. I make it my business to know everything about about the people who are after me. I knew the moment that Donald was engaged and the moment that dear Audrey left him. I'll admit, I felt a bit put out on his behalf. The man is dedicated to a fault, and I'm sure he would have carried that over into his marriage."

"What's your point?" Jacob asked, leaning forward miserably and bracing his elbows against his knees.

"My point, _Jacob_ ," Reddington said, emphasizing the younger man's name, "is that while I knew the moment that Elizabeth entered your life, I couldn't find much cursory information on her. I put my best man on it, in fact, and it took him two years - and a great deal more favours called in then I would have ever thought it would have been worth for mere curiosity - to… connect the dots, let's just say."

"You say a lot of nothing, you know that?"

"As do you. Apparently we share some propensities."

Jacob opened his mouth to tell Reddington that he was _nothing_ like him, but instead leapt from the chair, darting as quickly as he could for the half-bath in the hallway and choking as soon as he sank down next to the toilet. He was trembling, cursing the fact that he had no control over himself and the man he hated most was there to see it. There really had to be a way to keep him out without spending the rest of his life in prison for murder.

"You had a run in with Gina yesterday," Reddington said, as if he'd just heard what Jacob had said before.

"Yeah, so?" Jacob managed.

"What happened? Every detail."

"What the-"

"Humour me, Agent Phelps."

"Found her at Zhou's company. She ran, I followed, we fought, she won." He leaned his forehead against the cool porcelain.

"You were unconscious?"

"You think I would have let her get away otherwise?" he demanded, trying to decide if he could stand or not.

Reddington leaned in, his hand gripping the side of Jacob's head to tilt it to the side a little and the younger man tensed instantly, ready to fight for his life if he needed to. "Easy," Reddington said, his voice surprisingly soft. "They wouldn't have seen it, not with the bruises you're covered in."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Stay put, Agent Phelps." Reddington stepped out of the tiny room and Jacob heard what may have been a phone flipping open. He leaned down again, listening. "Agent Ressler, you'll want to contact anyone that the FBI has that may be looking into the toxins used on our three victims. Your partner has been poisoned."

Jacob blinked hard, turning and the movement caused him to sit back hard, back thudding against the wall. He looked up, feeling reality pulsing around him as Reddington spoke on the phone, closed it, and dialled another number. Whatever he said was lost as the agent felt the world start to slip away, his eyes heavy and he wasn't sure if he actually drifted off or not when he felt a sharp tap against his cheek. "Agent Phelps, you need to keep your eyes open. Look at me. _Jacob_."

A cough escaped him, but he didn't have anything left in his stomach to lose. Instead he sat slumped against the wall, body trembling and struggling to stay awake. It was becoming less and less apparent as to why he should bother, though Reddington kept telling him it was necessary.

"For Lizzie," he heard the other man say and blue eyes blinked back open, finding a strange look of what might have been concern on the older man's face. His brain tried to muddle through the fog, but didn't quite make it there as the knock came at the front door and Reddington slipped out of his view.

* * *

It had been three years since Donald Ressler had stood outside of a hospital room in Vienna, his partner's blood staining his clothes from where he'd held onto him, trying to slow the bleeding and keep him alive until help came. Jacob had been so pale and so very still lying against the white sheets that day, barely out of his first round of surgery and a breathing tube down his throat. They hadn't known if he would survive at that point and while the whole team had been there, Ressler had taken it the hardest. Jacob was a good man to work with when a job needed to be done, but he didn't connect well on a real and personal level. Somehow, though, he and Ressler had, and even at the end of his stint with Ressler's former task force, he had been Jacob's only real friend of the team. That was how he'd become responsible for calling his parents and Liz then, and he'd done the same that day. He hated those conversations, and leaving a voicemail for Liz when she's been in class had been even worse, but she'd gotten it. Ressler stood side by side with her as the medical staff ran more tests.

"He was running a fever last night," she said tightly, her eyes fixed on her husband through the large window that gave them a clear view of his hospital room. "He said he was just exhausted. I was stupid enough to believe him. I thought he'd just pushed himself until he caught a bug."

"It's not stupid. He probably thought the same thing," Ressler sighed. "He got checked over yesterday, but the doctors are saying that the needle mark was so small that they would have had to have been looking for it specifically to have seen it. They wouldn't have been able to detect the poison if a team hadn't already been looking for it."

"But they don't know what it is yet?" Liz asked softly.

"Not yet. We will."

His friend's wife turned to him, her clear blue eyes darker than usual. He hadn't seen that expression since Vienna. "Who did this to him, Don?"

Ressler sighed. "It's an active, classified investigation, Liz. You know I can't tell you that."

"They tried to kill my husband. To hell with protocol," she growled. "Who was it?"

"And what good would it do you to know? What are you going to do? Chase them down? He needs you here, Liz. Let us do our jobs."

The look she gave him made him wince. Audrey used to tell him how it looked from the other side. The secrets, the fear, it weighed on those that only saw pieces of the truth and all of the scars it left behind. "I'm not going to let him die, Liz."

Movement caught their attention and the doctor emerged from the room. "Are you both family of Agent Phelps'?" he asked.

Ressler opened his mouth to answer, but before he could Liz simply said "Yes," and shot him a look like she was daring him to argue with her on it.

"We have him as stable as he can be right now. We've slowed the poison down, but it's bought him hours more than he would have had at best. My people are working with your team, but what we need is the antidote."

"We have a team looking into that," Ressler answered. "You'll know as soon as we do."

"Can we go in?" Liz asked.

"He's pretty drowsy, but we're done with the tests for now."

She nodded and Ressler was halfway through the door behind her when his cell rang. He recognized the number and paused in the entrance. "If you've got a lead for us, now's the time."

" _Michael Leewood._ "

"Who is Michael Leewood?" Ressler demanded, his patience running far too thin for Reddington's games.

" _He's a high end dealer that supplies some rather lethal options for his clientele. Dembe will text you the address. He should be able to lead you to Zanetakos._ " There was a pause. " _How is Agent Phelps holding up?_ "

Ressler glanced over to where Liz had taken a seat in the edge of the bed, her hand steadily pushing back dark hair and speaking quietly to the man she loved. "He's stubborn," Ressler answered after a moment.

" _You never thought you'd count that amongst his virtues,_ " Reddington chuckled.

"Only once before. Have Dembe send the information and I'll coordinate from this end." He ended the call and turned towards his friend who was watching him with a blurry sort of gaze. "Hey. If you needed a day off all you had to do is say so."

Jacob gave a short chuckle that quickly turned into a cough. "Little much, huh?" he rasped. "You guys closing in?"

"Just got some new evidence. I have to go, but-"

"I'll call you if anything changes," Liz promised.

Ressler nodded, risking one more glance back at his partner. "We're going to find her, Jake. We're going to fix this."

"I know," the younger man breathed. "You owe me a couple rounds in the boxing ring, anyway. Don't think I'm letting you out of that so easily."

Ressler quirked a smile and turned as the address buzzed through on his phone. He'd been the one to give Cooper Jacob's name. He'd been the one to drag him back in, and he'd be damned if he would be the one that let him die now.

* * *

Jacob had been in and out, the medication they had him on that was helping to slow the poison pulling him back to sleep every time he tried to wake up. Bruce and Kelly were there, steady and constant.

"How long has he been back in the field?"

Liz looked up, startled by Bruce's gruff voice. She blinked at the cup of coffee that he was offering her and tried for a grateful smile. "Thanks. He's been back for a few months now," she answered. "Didn't he mention it? I thought he had."

Bruce chuckled and settled into the seat next to hers, his dark eyes drifting over to where his son slept. "You know Jacob. He keeps things pretty close. I suppose we just didn't ask the right questions."

Liz found her smile softening a little. "That's Jacob," she agreed. "He and I did talk about it."

He nodded. "How are you holding up?"

She opened her mouth, ready to respond, but then closed it. They had been through a lot lately. Her kidnapping, his longer and more stressful hours, the adoption, and now this. Life hadn't stopped, and she… She had just been along for the ride. It was, in part, what was expected from her. She was an FBI wife, just a professor. She'd sunk so deeply into the part that she almost believed it herself most days. She certainly had these people fooled. Even Jacob, who was usually so good at reading situations, hadn't questioned her role once. She was playing the part so well that she was sitting there and worrying rather than taking the information she knew and doing something with it. Michael Leewood. That had been the name Ressler had repeated. She knew that name. He was a high end drug dealer that often catered to people with less recreational goals. If you needed it, he could get it. For a price. That limited the people that would go to him. They would have to be wealthy, or have a wealthy backer.

"Liz?" Bruce prompted quietly.

She blinked, almost forgetting he was there. "I'm… It's been rough," she answered.

Ressler had said _her_. They were going to find _her_ and fix this. A woman with what almost had to be corporate backing. Gina Zanetakos.

"Liz, sweetie, are you okay?" Kelly asked from the other side of the room.

Liz looked to her husband. It was a risk, but it also might be his only chance. "I think I need some air."

Kelly nodded. "I have your number."

"Okay," Liz managed, moving to the side of the bed to press a kiss to his clammy forehead. "I love you."

He didn't stir, and that was probably for the best. She couldn't approach this as Elizabeth Phelps. She wasn't a wife worried for her husband, she was an operative salvaging a lead to her goal. If Phelps died, so did her path to Reddington. That was all Gina needed to know.

* * *

TBC

Notes: Thank you for the birthday wishes yesterday! You guys are so sweet!

This plot is getting so twisty right now that I actually had to sit down and reread through some of the stuff I've posted already to make sure that I had everything lined up the way I thought it was. The fact that some of the stuff is sort of going on behind the scenes and will have a reveal later doesn't help lol.

Next time - Ressler shakes down Leewood, Liz risks her cover to get the antidote, and Reddington is always several steps ahead.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Eight**

"I don't think you understand what kind of trouble you're in, pal," Ressler growled. "Your girl poisoned one of my team members."

"Lawyer," Leewood spat out, crossing his arms over his chest.

"We have the link to you. If he dies, you're on the hook for murder of a federal agent. Do you understand that?"

"Lawyer," he said again.

"Not here, buddy. You're being held as a potential terrorist," Ressler answered before storming out of the interrogation room.

"Reddington's word won't be enough to hold him," Meera said quietly. "Just heard back from the agents combing his place. They haven't found anything. We're checking-"

"There isn't time," Ressler snapped, causing Meera to quirk an eyebrow at his tone. "Sorry," he breathed out. "You didn't see him. He's… We don't have time to waste. We need him to lead us to Gina. What about Reddington?"

"Nothing. We've tried reaching him a couple of times, but no response yet."

"He's the one that found Jacob. I still don't have that full story, but the fact that he was at his house again isn't good."

Meera paused, pursing her lips together. "You think he had something to do with it?"

Half a beat passed before a sigh escaped. "No. Not really. I just wish I knew what his angle is with Jake."

"The question everyone's wondering, I assure you," Meera murmured, her gaze drifting behind him. "Agent Cooper."

Ressler turned just in time to offer Cooper a nod of greeting. "Where are we?" the AD asked.

"Still chasing down every angle, sir."

"I don't need to tell you to chase them down quickly. Phelps is one of ours. Where the hell is Reddington?"

"Not answering our calls, sir," Meera answered.

"Track him. We put that damn thing in his neck for a reason. Find Reddington and find Zanetakos."

* * *

Elizabeth Phelps pulled her jacket up close around her face as she walked some ten paces behind the woman she had been looking for. Gina turned a corner abruptly and Liz waited just a moment or two longer than her pace would have naturally gotten her there before she followed. Immediately she ducked, the fist barely missing her and she bobbed around to the other side, her expression smug. "Zanetakos."

"Rostova," Gina answers the greeting in return, showing her gloved hands the be empty. "What could be so important that you risk blowing both of our covers?"

"You poisoned an FBI agent yesterday. Jacob Phelps. He's integral to my assignment."

"Your boyfriend?" Gina chuckled. "I imagine he is."

Liz rolled her eyes. "The antidote, Gina."

The blonde snorted. "You should have kept your FBI boyfriend out of my way, Masha. I have my own assignment to fulfill and he stuck his nose into it. You'll have to find a new in."

Gina had always hated her. That was fine. The feeling was mutual. "This is over three years in the making. No. He's my in. Your arrogant, Zanetakos, but even you wouldn't take the job unless you had the antidote on you. You're going to hand that over."

"Or what? You'll tell _daddy_?"

Liz snorted. "Go ahead and laugh. Bud handed the Berlin assignment to me because I can get it done. If he finds out that you undid _years_ of work for your petty jealousy streak…"

Gina stiffened and frowned. Liz did her best to keep her expression even, but she knew she had her. It wasn't often that she levied McCready's wrath on a fellow operative, but she didn't have time to haggle.

Slowly the elder woman reached into her jacket pocket and pulled a plastic vial from it. She paused as Liz's fingers touched it. Dark eyes caught her gaze and she didn't like the look in them. "I've heard stories about Berlin. You won't have any trouble tying up loose ends when you're done with him, will you?"

"Why would I?"

Gina released the antidote. "This just seems a little personal, Rostova. Maybe you've let yourself get in too deep."

"Focus on your own mission, Zanetakos, and when it comes time for me to finish mine, I will. He's a job. An in. When he's served his purpose I'll put a bullet in his head."

"Such a waste," Gina sighed. "Too bad he's a fed."

Liz didn't respond as she turned towards the street. She waited a couple of moments before moving to follow her.

"I wouldn't do that," a voice said from behind her and she whirled, eyes widening a fraction at the sight of Raymond Reddington leaning casually against the side of the building like he'd been there the whole time. He hadn't. She was sure of it. The question was when - and how - had he snuck up on her?

A smile stretched his thin lips. "Your husband's partner should be here shortly. He'll find Zanetakos, but I hardly think you can just waltz up to him and hand over that antidote you got from her. Not without thoroughly destroying your cover, of course."

She truly hated this man. Whatever Berlin had in store for him, he had it coming. Liz plastered the most innocent look she could manage for the situation. "I'm not sure what you think-"

"Oh I think a great many things, but right now I think you're running out of time. If you want to save him because he's a part of whatever job you're working or you're madly in love with your mark really means very little to me. Give me the antidote and I can get it to him without your cover being blown."

"And what do you want in return?" she asked tightly.

"Smart girl. I thought as much. I don't have anything I want that you'd be willing to give at this point, so let's say that I'll collect later. Don't worry, it won't jeopardize your assignment."

"And you'll get it to him?" she asked cautiously. "How do I know I can trust you?"

"You don't, but your other options are looking fairly bleak." Sirens sounded from behind her and Liz stiffened. "Now, you can continue to contemplate it as your husband slips beyond the help of that antidote or you can take a risk. It's your decision, Elizabeth, but make it quickly."

He was her enemy, her real mark. She should kill him right there, but she couldn't. He could help save Jacob. if Bud ever found out that she had made this deal, he'd put her down, no matter what he thought of her now. Without letting her training talk her out of it, she shoved the vial into his hand. "If you don't come through I _will_ kill you," she growled dangerously.

Much to her surprise, Reddington's smug smile faded and an almost sad expression flickered through his eyes before he regained his composure. He cleared his throat and fit the vial into his inside jacket pocket. "I look forward to completing our business together, Mrs Phelps. I would suggest you take the long way around so you aren't seen."

He strode past her and Liz felt a strange sort of tightened settle in her chest. She didn't trust him. He was using Jacob to get to her, and she had all but handed him a signed confession that she loved the man. This situation was spiral lying dangerously, and if she didn't get control of it, it would take them all down in flames.

* * *

Reddington had expected them to track him there, but even if he'd had the FBI on a leash he couldn't have planned it better. They had Gina up against one of the vehicles as he walked towards them, loosing a low whistle as if he were actually impressed. "Well done, Donald."

Ressler snorted at the sarcastic praise. "Good for the case, but unless we can get her to talk, we won't get the antidote in time."

"Oh, I wouldn't worry too much over that. I'm sure you'll offer her the appropriate plea deal to get her to rat out her current employer."

"That doesn't do my partner a damn bit of good," the agent growled.

"No, but you'll need her shelf corporation broker's name to pay me for this," Reddington said easily as he pulled the vial out of his coat pocket.

Ressler nearly gaped at him. "How did you-"

"Please, Donald, after chasing me - and failing to catch me - for so long, do you really have so little faith in my abilities? Your word that you will give me the name is the only thing I need to hand this to you right now."

"How do you know I won't go back on it?"

"Please. You? Your word is more iron clad than any legally binding deal. You're a good man, even if a little slow in the intelligence department."

He watched Ressler bristle with a sort of lazy smirk on his features, but finally the other man nodded. "Deal."

"Excellent. Give Agent Phelps my best wishes on a speedy recovery."

Ressler all but tore the vial from his hand and was off. Reddington only wondered if he would beat Elizabeth there.

* * *

He had been in and out, the drugs they had coursing through his system making it hard to stay awake. When he managed, though, he found himself spending at least half of his wakeful moments trying to piece together what had happened. It was irritating, something like running through a thick fog and not having a clue what direction to turn, much less where he'd come from or was going to. It was getting harder to breathe, he thought, and everything hurt. He was hot and then cold and then both at once. Currently, though, he felt like his skin was on fire and he kicked at the sheets wrapped around him.

"Jacob, honey?" a familiar voice said near and he felt a cool hand against his forehead.

He blinked his eyes sluggishly open. "Mom?"

Kelly offered him a smile. "Hey there. How're you feeling?"

"Crappy," he rasped, the words riding out of a weak cough.

"Here," she said, offering him some water.

He shook his head, regretting it instantly when his headache worsened. Jacob groaned and sunk deeper into his pillow. "Where's Liz?"

A sigh escaped the woman that had been his mother for the last nearly twenty years. "She stepped out. I'm sure she'll be back soon."

Something was wrong. He couldn't shake the feeling that she'd given him that same answer at least once before. Maybe more. He blinked hard, trying to clear his vision and his mind. "Is she-?"

"Right here," Kelly said, sounding relieved.

Jacob looked towards the door and could just barely make out the blurry form of his wife. She moved towards him and reached for something on the side table. His world came a little more into focus as she placed his glasses on his nose. "Better?"

"Where've you been?" He hated how the desperate way that question left him.

Liz smiled at him though, and she bent and pressed a kiss to his chapped lips. He felt a warm tear hit his own cheek as it slipped from hers. "I love you," she whispered, her voice trembling. "I just needed to clear my head. I'm sorry."

"S'okay," he mumbled and leaned into her touch. "I'm sorry, babe."

She snorted a small laugh. "How is this your fault?"

"My job. I promised… This is why I got out. Didn't want to leave you alone."

He saw her brows draw together and she looked like she might just barely be holding it together. "You won't. You're not going anywhere, do you hear me?"

Jacob chuckled roughly. "I know better than to argue with you by now. You throw things."

Finally she cracked a smile. "That was once, you jerk, and I didn't even hit you."

"Almost," he teased with a smile. He could feel himself sinking again, but he didn't want to sleep. He just wanted to hang onto her hand like it was his tether.

"They got it!"

Jacob blinked hard, Ressler's voice jarring him back.

"Got what, Don?" Bruce asked.

"The cure." Ressler came into view and he was nearly beaming. Liz moved back just a little, never releasing Jacob's hand. "You hear that, Jake?"

"Whole world heard you, buddy," Jacob said with a small smile. "I owe you."

"It was a team effort," Ressler said and he looked relieved. Jacob wondered just how close to the edge he'd slipped if Ressler were excited he wasn't dead.

"We're going to need everyone to clear the room."

"We'll be right outside," Liz promised him and he offered her a smile.

"Love you."

"You too. You're going to be okay."

"I know."

He watched them leave, feeling his eyes drift closed almost as soon as Liz's fingers slipped from his.

* * *

In the last update he'd received from Agent Ressler, the doctors were still uncertain that they had gotten the antidote to Phelps in time. It was a waiting game now, and if he made it through the next twelve hours they would have a better outlook. They had taken Gina into custody, of course, and true to her nature had given them a piece of information that would lead them to her employer , but wouldn't be directly linked to her. The Major would likely let the slip up slide and she wouldn't be in prison long. None of his operatives ever were.

The phones were silent as he entered the little shop, an oddity at any hour as far as Reddington had ever known. He cleared his throat, catching the attention of the young woman that was irritably going through stacks of paperwork. She turned, her words dying out at the sight of him and a small, one sort of smile perked her lips. "Red, it's been a while."

"Good heavens, Ziggy, what happened?" he asked, looking around at the mess. He knew. Of course he knew, but he liked Ziggy. There was no reason for her to know that he was indirectly linked to the raid. Anyway, that had been on Gina.

"FBI," she groused. "They tore through looking for one of my clients."

"Goodness, that will be bad for business if it gets out."

She shrugged, wheeling her chair over to another countertop. "They'll get over it," she huffed. "I'm surprised they didn' try to shut me down completely."

"You obviously weren't their target."

"Might as well have been. Now I've got to move shop. Do you know how expensive that is? How much trouble?"

"Quite a bit, I'd assume," Reddington mused softly.

"So what can I do for you, Red?"

"Can't a man come by to see a beautiful woman?"

"Always charming," she teased. "And always working. If you need an account, I have a few tucked away that they didn't get their hands on. Just let me know-"

"What if I were to offer you a chance to secure your business in a place the FBI would be hard pressed to ever bother you at again?"

"I'd say you want more than an account," Ziggy answered carefully.

"Beauty and brains. I'm looking for account information for a woman I believe might be a client of yours. The information may be extensive, but I'm willing to pay for it, and, from the sounds of it, I happened in at just the right moment. Your clients know well enough the risks involved with shelf corps. After an FBI raid your protocol tends to be to shift the assets around, hmm?"

Ziggy studied him for a moment. "You'll handle the transfer?"

"Every last detail."

"I can't give you access to the funds themselves."

"Of course not. I just need to follow the trail."

Slowly she nodded. "You have the account name?"

"I do indeed," Reddington said as he slipped the paper across the counter to her, _Masha Rostova_ written in his neat handwriting as the account holder.

* * *

TBC

Notes: Well, I got this edited down for tonight because I know I'm going to be pretty busy tomorrow and Friday and may not have a chance to update then. We'll see. I hope all of my American readers have a lovely Thanksgiving tomorrow! I hope you get tons of turkey and ham and everything tasty. I'm about to go try my hand at baking an apple pie. We'll see how that goes.

Next time - Jacob uses his recovery time to follow up on leads to try to track down the reason Reddington is so interested in he and his wife while the task force gets a new blacklister.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Nine**

"I don't need a babysitter, you know," Jacob groused from his place on the couch, afghan draped over him and his hot tea and book well within reach. Liz had made sure of it. He'd been home from the hospital for nearly three full days and it was everything he could get his wife to do not to cancel the teaching conference that they had actually planned to attend together. That wasn't happening, but that didn't mean that she had to cancel.

"Well you told Kelly and Bruce not to drop by-"

"And my folks know me well enough not to."

"- so that left Don. He's just going to look in on you."

"The doctor said the poison is cleared out of my system. It's just recovery from here. Look? I'm on the couch. I'm not even at the computer, much less at the office." He flashed her his most innocent smile. "Don't you trust me, Lizzie?"

"No," his wife answered cheerfully and leaned down to kiss him. "Just let me have some peace of mind if you're making me go to this?"

"You were looking forward to it."

"And then a violent psychopath poisoned my husband."

Jacob chuckled, the sound dissolving into a cough. Liz shot him a look and he gave her a sheepish smile in return. He caught her hand, thumb running over her knuckles. "Say the word, babe, and I'm out."

"You don't want that."

"No," he said slowly, "but I will. You and me and our family is what matters."

"And I love you for it," Liz said. "I can't ask you to quit your job. I just… All I needs for you to be safe."

"I'll do my best."

"No more hospital trips."

"No more," he promised.

"Good. Don promised he'd be by this morning after he goes by your office."

"Is he on a case?"

"Sounded like it."

Jacob frowned and opened his mouth, but the doorbell stopped him and Hudson went tearing towards the door, barking the whole way. He started to get up, but Liz shot him a look and he sank back against his pillows. "Love you. I'll be back tomorrow."

"Be safe," he answered and grabbed her hand, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. "Love you too."

He held on until she had to pull away to get the door. "Hey, Don," was all he heard before his wife lowered her voice to speak to him, presumably so that Jacob wouldn't argue it. He rolled his eyes and slouched down a little further, listening as the conversation ended and the door closed behind Liz.

Ressler peeked around the corner. "How're you feeling?"

"Better than what Liz will have you believe," Jacob sulked. "Please tell me you brought me the information to look over. I'm going stir crazy."

His friend glanced back as if to make sure Liz wasn't coming back in. "I need your word - not a flippant promise, Jake, your _word_ \- that all you'll do is look over it from here if I give you this."

Jacob shifted, sitting up a little more. "Sure."

Ressler didn't look entirely convinced, but he pulled the files out of his satchel and handed them over. Jacob took them, flashing his most innocent look as he straightened his glasses and opened the first one up.

"I forget how obsessive you get when your benched."

Jacob shrugged, skimming the notes. "Zanetakos just rolled on her employer?"

"For a price."

"And she just handed over the antidote for this?" Jacob mused. He was missing something in the write up. He just couldn't figure out what it was.

"Not exactly."

That caught the younger man's attention and he looked up. "What'd you give her, Ress?"

"I didn't. Reddington did."

Jacob felt a little sick. "You're saying I owe my life to Reddington?"

"You don't owe him anything. He bargained for it. He got the name of her Shelf Corp broker and we got the antidote."

"How the hell did you get Cooper to agree to that?"

"I didn't," Ressler said quietly and Jacob sat all the way up.

"You went around protocol? For me? Ress, I didn't know you cared so much."

Jacob had barely contained his grin as he spoke and Ressler rolled his eyes, grabbing a pillow from the couch and tossing it at him. "Shut up, Phelps."

The dark haired man grinned. "Seriously though. Thank you."

"Yeah, well, after Cooper told me I did the right thing. Looks like you're working your charm again. I have no idea how you do it."

"It's a gift."

"So is your snark, apparently."

"Also true." Jacob watched his friend settle on the arm of the couch. "So did Reddington bring in a new case yet?"

Ressler's lips thinned. "Yeah, but we're good. All you get to look over is a closed case. I know exactly what you'll do if you get ahold of a live one."

"I can help from here," Jacob pressed. "Ress-"

"You are addicted, pal," Ressler chuckled. "Listen, I've got to go back in. Take it easy. Call if you need me."

"Will do," Jacob murmured, leaning back into the couch again, his mind focused in on what Ressler had said as his friend left. Reddington was using them for something. He was gathering pieces of information from them, and he wanted to know what that was. It had been several days since the FBI had visited this broker of Zanetakos', but she seemed like the best lead. It would be much later in the day before Ressler came back around, so if he were going to do something to track her down, it needed to be now.

He pushed himself off the couch and pulled in a deep breath, pleased that it didn't send him into a coughing fit. Shower first, and then he would do a little investigation of his own.

* * *

Raymond Reddington climbed the steps outside of the Phelps' town home one by one. He had received unsettling news that two days prior that had caused him to rethink the case he was ready to present to the task force in Jacob's absence. He had thought that the one positive that might have come out of the agent's near-death experience was that the adoption would be put on hold. The agency had not done so, though, and with events unfolding as quickly as they were around them, it was hardly safe to bring a child into it. He might be able to reevaluate for Jacob if it came down to that, but a child… Even Red had his limits. It was time to halt the adoption process in its tracks before the baby was born.

The Concierge of Crime pressed a finger against the doorbell and waited. The double doors made it difficult to tell if anyone was coming, but after his last two visits had been met with violent hostility, he thought it might be wiser to knock first this time.

He waited, about ready to go around to the back and slip in that way after all when he heard the inner door open. Jacob Phelps looked more than a little put out when he saw him, but he opened the door anyway. "What?"

"I feel your mother must have failed you when it comes to the manners department," Reddington sighed and the younger man rolled his eyes and stepped back.

"You're going to come in anyway," he groused and Red stepped past him, pulling his hat from his head.

"You look much better. Going somewhere?"

Jacob paused and then looked down at his own jeans and button up shirt he wore. "Why would I be?"

Reddington snorted. The man had proven adept at both avoiding direct questions and also lying without batting an eye. He might have truly missed his real calling in life. He would have made a superb criminal.

"Reddington, I'm assuming there's a reason you're in my home?"

Blue eyes blinked, his attention coming back around to the present. "Amanda Hansen," he said simply and watched some of the colour drain from the FBI agents face.

"Say what?"

"Amanda Hansen. Tell me what you know about her."

"Why the hell would you need to know about Amanda Hansen? And how-?"

"I've told you before, Agent Phelps: I know quite a bit about you. Your adoptive parents went to great lengths to give you a second chance without the darker aspects of your time in the foster system getting in the way, but they could only do so much." He watched the younger man's expression close off completely, sinking back behind a carefully constructed mask that would have told anyone else that he was having a simple conversation with an acquaintance.

"Is this case related?"

"It is."

Jacob tilted his head a little. "Whatever you think she has to do with that list of yours, she doesn't. That's all you need to know."

Reddington frowned. "I'd assume your team doesn't have all the information about your last couple of years in the system, so I thought-"

"You thought that you'd drag me through that," Jacob cut him off, his tone sharp.

"No, I thought I'd leave your name out of it. You're recovering, there's no need for you to be on this case, though any information about Ms Hansen that you could provide me would certainly help your team."

"You're a twisted bastard, Red."

A smug smile crossed his lips.

"Tell me what you're looking at first. I can't help you if you don't."

"And then you'll jump in the middle of it. No, Agent Phelps, I get the distinct impression that your wife may commit murder if I were to put you in any more immediate danger. That is one woman I'm certain that I don't want to anger."

Jacob snorted. "You have no idea, but it's your lucky day. Liz is at a conference. She won't be back until late tomorrow."

Reddington straightening just a little. Interesting. That certainly changed his plans for the day.

"You know what?" Jacob asked as he motioned towards the door. "If you're not going to tell me anything about it, then I don't have any information for you. I'll talk to Ressler directly."

"And risk things coming to light?" Reddington ask curiously.

"I trust my partner. I don't trust you. Easy decision."

A low chuckle escaped the older man and he nodded. "Very well."

He turned, hat fit against his head and he set his sunglasses on his nose to start down the steps. "Reddington?" The man in question turned. "I don't like working with half the facts. You give me the full story and it's going to make working together a lot easier."

"Have a good afternoon, Agent Phelps," Reddington said with a smile and started down the stairs, climbing into the back seat of the waiting car. "Mr Grey, I need you to find Elizabeth Phelps please."

* * *

Ressler hadn't expected to get a new case until Jacob was cleared back, not really, but Reddington had dropped in late the night before, catching him just before he was ready to go home, and had dropped a new case on the teams' desk. It was a couple, sort of a Bonnie and Clyde that were stealing from high-end marks. They'd made their way across the country and Reddington seemed to think that their next target was right there in the DC area. Ressler hadn't expected to spend his Friday night bent over what paperwork he had pulled together by the time he left, nor had he really wanted to be in this early on a Saturday, but he wasn't the only one.

"Freddie Landers and Amanda Hansen," Meera said as Landers' mugshot and Hansen's Illinois driver's license was put up on the big screen. "Landers has priors, though has never been convicted of anything more than petty theft. Hansen has near to nothing on her. Grew up in the foster system, but once she turned eighteen she simply disappeared off the grid."

"That's the newest photo we have on her?" Ressler asked, looking at the girl's young face.

"Right now it is," Aram said from his desk. "It's over ten years old, and I'm digging for anything else that I can find."

"Where the hell is Reddington?" Ressler asked. "He dropped this on us and doesn't bother to show up?"

"Dembe called a bit ago and said he'd be out of pocket for the rest of the day," Meera sighed. "We can always track him down if we need to."

Ressler's phone buzzed loudly in his pocket and he pulled it out, seeing his friend's phone number flash across the screen. "Aram, find out what you can about Hansen. Meera, you and I are going to follow the money and find out why these people haven't reported the kind of numbers Reddington is telling us as having been stolen. Something's not right here." He pulled the phone to his ear. "Hey, Jake, everything okay?"

" _You got a second to step away_?"

"Make it fast."

" _Reddington stopped by my place this morning and said something about Amanda Hansen._ "

There was something in Jacob's voice that Ressler didn't like. He ducked off to the side and out of the immediate hearing of his other teammates. "Yeah?"

" _I know her._ "

"Say again?"

"Well, I did. Back in foster care. She was in the same house as I was in my last home."

Ressler loosed a breath. Jacob had never told him a great deal about that final foster home he'd run away from, but the fact that he'd taken off running said a lot. He didn't like to talk about it. "She's partnered up with a guy named Freddie Landers. Is that familiar?"

" _Nope, don't know that one, but listen, Ress, Mandy is… What's Reddington saying she's done?_ "

Ressler glanced back to make sure that the others were busy and not listening to him. "She's teamed up with Landers for robberies, but the weird thing is that no one that Reddington is saying that the people that they've stolen from seems haven't reported the money missing. Something's not right."

Jacob sighed on the other end of the line. " _She's not a bad person, Ress. She's been through hell in her life. If she's mixed up in this…. it's him._ "

"Sounds a little biased, Jake. You think she might reach out to you?"

" _I haven't seen or talked to Mandy in nearly twenty years._ "

"If she does, let me know. Otherwise, you better be curled up at home on your couch."

"' _Course. Keep me looped in?_ "

"I'll do my best." He ended the call, pulling in a deep breath. If Jacob had to sit a case out, this was probably the best one for him. Ressler just wondered if Reddington would have had any way to know that.

* * *

Jacob set the phone down, looking up to the address that had been left in the file he'd been looking over earlier. This was where Zanetakos had gone to speak to someone about a shelf corporation to move her money through, and this was the same place that Reddington had come looking for… something. The man had both tried to kill him and saved his life. There was a reason that he'd turned himself into the FBI, there was a reason that he demanded Jacob for the team that he wanted, and there was a reason that he had looked at Liz as he had. So many questions made the agent uncomfortable, and it was time to get some answers.

He stepped out, pulling his jacket close, running his hand through his short hair and spotting a young woman directing movers from her wheelchair. She glanced up, looking frustrated with everything that surrounded her. "Sorry, baby, but we're closed."

"So I hear," Jacob said easily, taking in the scene. Someone like her would need the trust of her clients, so Reddington would have had to have given her something worth the name she gave. This move, it had to be him. In an instant he made a decision and flashed her his most charming smile. "Mr Reddington sent me by to make sure everything was running smoothly."

"I don't know you. I met the man that's supposed to be coordinating this, and you're not him."

His grin didn't falter and he reached a hand out to her. "Keen. Tom Keen. Mr Grey was called off on some urgent business. You know how it goes."

She studied him for a moment, as if trying to get a read on him, and finally she nodded. "Moving a business like mine is always a problem, even with it being taken care of," she groused, glaring at one mover in particular.

"Never know what they'll put in the wrong place," Jacob chuckled, stuffing his hands in his jacket pocket.

"I've been waiting to hear from your boss. I need to move Rostova's assets and I can't wait much longer."

Jacob didn't flinch, but filed the name away. "I'll let Mr Reddington know. Anything else you need passed along?"

She snorted, crossing her arms over her chest. "He should hire different movers."

His smile broadened. "I'll let him know." He turned, not wanting to push his luck. There was a good chance that if she mentioned it to Reddington that he'd ask for a description and he might even follow that back to him. That was fine. Let him. Jacob would be well on his way to finding out exactly who this Rostova person was and how he or she fit into Reddington's plans.

* * *

Liz had worked enough undercover jobs over the years that she was well aware that, sometimes, she had to pay her dues to keep up appearances. She had hoped that these particular dues would have at least seconded as a weekend away with her husband, but Gina had seen to it that that hadn't happened. Liz supposed she should focus more on the fact that Jacob had survived the experience rather than how much she missed their chance to get away together, but it seemed like every inch of their somewhat normal life that they had built up in the last two years was being torn apart. Ever since Reddington had come back into the picture she had felt her world shifting, and if she lost Jacob because of that - either to death or because he found out who she really was - she wasn't sure she could manage. In his own way, he had broken her. She'd been a top-notch operative before him, able to move in and out of personas with ease. She could use and toss away the fake relationships she formed and never bother to blink, but something about him was different. Liz wasn't sure when exactly the change had occurred, but somewhere in there he had gone from a mark to the man she loved. The fact that she even could fall in love with someone anymore was still a strange concept to her, but it wasn't like he was a great deal different in that. He'd told her time and again that she was the only woman he'd ever loved and she believed him. Someday, maybe, she could try to find a way to explain where she came from as well. For now, the lies would have to do. At least they had bits of the truth wrapped into them. The important parts were all there.

She pulled in a deep breath and shoved her hands deep in her pockets as she walked down the main stretch in the center of the university that she was at. There has been someone following behind her for a few minutes now. She hadn't had a chance to look back in a way that wasn't entirely obvious yet, but as she took a turn down a side street off the beaten path and he followed, her hopes that she was just being paranoid dwindled.

"Ms Phelps, I was hoping to speak with you for a moment?"

Liz turned, recognizing the voice immediately. "What are you doing here?" she demanded, leveling a glare at Raymond Reddington. "When Jacob finds out-"

"But he won't, will he?"

She watched him carefully. "What do you want?"

"A chat," he answered, his smile relaxed and easy. "There's a nice little coffee house just around the corner-"

"I'm not going anywhere with you. If you have something to say, you can do it here."

Reddington blinked at her. "Very well, Elizabeth, if that's what you want. I've come here to call in my favour that you owe me."

She snorted, hiding the discomfort she felt at the use of her name. "And what would that be?"

"I want you to cancel the adoption you and Jacob are in the process of."

Liz had always been talented in thinking on her feet, but that one struck her hard. "Excuse me?"

"The adoption. You need to back out of it."

"And why would I do that?"

"Well, if not simply to fulfill your promise to me when I helped to protect your cover with your husband, then for this." He held an envelope out to her and she took it after a moment of hesitation, finally pulling it open. The man that had nearly killed her husband waited silently as she tugged the papers from their place and unfolded them, reading her husband's name along the top.

As she scanned the pages she felt her chest tighten. "These are supposed to be sealed."

"Anyone can get anything with enough patience and resources at their fingertips, Elizabeth. Surely you know that. Currently your husband's team is working a case tied very closely with his final days in the foster care system. A housemate of his from that time, Amanda Hansen, has teamed up with quite an unsavory man and they are in the process of tracking her down. Now, they know him well enough I suppose that guilt by association is a bit of a stretch, but what sort of questions about your husband's character will _this_ sort of information raise?" he asked, motioning to the paperwork. "I'd say that it has the potential to do quite a bit of harm to his career. It would certainly sideline him for a time, and that, my dear, would put you in quite the position, wouldn't it?"

"You don't know anything about my position," Liz snapped.

"I know enough. Not everything, no, but I promise you, my dear, I have ample resources _and_ patience to figure out just where all the pieces go. I will find it. The question is, are you willing to sacrifice what time you have with your husband now? Should he become obsolete, I fear that at the very best you'll be recalled, and at worse… Well, would you be able to kill him now?"

"Why are you doing this?" she whispered, finding that the way her voice shook ever so slightly wasn't an act at all, and that made it all the worse. How much _did_ this man know, and if he knew that she was after him, why was he playing this game? None of it made sense. "Your fight is with me, not him."

"Believe it or not I am _protecting_ you, Elizabeth."

"By destroying my family?"

"A child will not fix the lies you've told, nor will it fix him and the struggles he faces. Cancel the adoption, or I will end your husband's career and you _will_ lose him one way or another. Your employer will have no further use for him. Think it over, but if you both accept that child, I will release this to his task force."

Liz watched Reddington walk, holding the papers in her hands. She wasn't sure what the task force would do if they found out. She wasn't sure that Donald Ressler _didn't_ know, but she also couldn't risk it. She couldn't risk Jacob.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Life has been crazy busy lately and I'm so sorry I haven't gotten back to reviews personally very much lately. I feel like a horrible person, but know that without a doubt I read each one and they make my entire day. You guys are the best!

Next time - Jacob receives an unexpected visitor and things spiral downward from there.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Ten**

Rostova. Jacob was sure he'd read the name before. The information Ressler had brought him was a compilation of some of the cases they had worked since Reddington had jumped into the mix. Anything that they'd gotten from the shelf Corp broker would be outdated soon enough, but he was able to find the surname in the files to match with a first name. Once he had Masha, his brain snapped into gear and he went digging through a list he had halfway memorised from the forger case. The more he looked through the files the more he found. While he didn't have any information that was immediately useful, he did finally have a name, and that was a lead as to why Reddington had turned himself in and disrupted his life.

Hudson perked up at his feet where he sat at the kitchen table, files spread out in front of him like pieces to a puzzle. As soon as the knock came from the front door, the dog nearly spun out in his hurry to get to it, barking the whole way. Jacob pulled himself up from the chair, cursing his still healing body and the sluggishness that came with it.

He trudged up to the door, expecting Ressler on the other side, but the wide green eyes that he hadn't seen in nearly twenty years caught him by surprise. She stared at him, as if in shock for a moment that he'd actually answered the door, and he couldn't help but note that she looked just a little older with the same cuts and bruises that she'd had the last time he'd seen her. Some things never changed.

"Jacob? Jacob, I hoped you'd be here."

There wasn't any warning as the young woman launched herself through the doorway and wrapped her arms around his neck. Jacob froze where he was, hands down at his side and stiff as a board. Hudson was barking at his feet and all at once he seemed to realize that they were standing on his porch and how much attention that might call. "Inside," he snapped, pulling her in after him and shutting the door. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry. I know… I was hoping you'd protect me."

"From what?" he asked carefully. She had no way to know who he worked for, and even if she did, she had no way to know that it was his team working her case.

"I got mixed up in some bad stuff, Jacob. I don't know how to get out."

The last time he'd seen her she'd barely spoken ten words together at one time. She had always been a quiet thing, but by the time Jacob had run she was as terrified as he had never admitted to feeling. He'd left her there, abandoned her. For two years they'd done what they could to watch out for each other. They hadn't been friends, per se, but they had been allies of sorts in the terrible situation that they'd found themselves in. She was a year older than him and, even as a young teen, he'd always been stronger than she was. Not that that was saying much, but they'd worked together to avoid the dangers rather than simply weather them. Sometimes they succeeded, sometimes they didn't. They had tried to protect each other.

"I heard you were a cop or something," she mumbled softly, looking down at her worn shoes. "Crazy. I never would have thought you'd have been the one. House and everything."

Jacob felt a small smile tug his lips as she looked around his home. "Not an act, either." He shifted his weight a little. "Tell me what happened, Mandy."

"I met Freddie in New Jersey. He was… I don't know. I got caught up stealing with him, but he wanted more and more and we started this con." She looked at him like he was going to pull a pair of cuffs in her there and then.

Instead he motioned for her to follow him and he started putting his files out of the way. "I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong," he coaxed softly.

"He said that we were stealing from people that had already stolen so they couldn't report it. I didn't know who the first guy was at first, but Freddie and said this guy he knew had an in. He came back with more money than I'd ever seen in my life."

Jacob moved to the kitchen as she spoke, running water in the kettle and putting it on the stove to heat. "What's Freddie's partner's name?"

"I don't know. He won't let me meet him." She glanced back nervously at the door. "I tried telling Freddie it was getting bad. Even I'd heard of this last guy he robbed, and we left New York so fast that I _know_ he nearly got caught. I think they got his buddy, so it's not long until these guys find us. He's scared, but he won't go to the cops because-"

"Yeah, prison isn't anyone's first option," Jacob answered and pulled two mugs from the shelf.

"I should go. Freddie'll know I've been gone. He'll be angry."

"You had to put some effort into finding me, Mandy. Hell, to even know where I was. If you walk out that door I can't help you."

"I shouldn't have come here anyway."

"Why not?"

"Freddie'll me mad."

Jacob's lips thinned out and the kettle started to sing behind him. "I'll tell you what, Mandy. You tell me everything you know about Freddie and his cons and I'll make sure he never lays a hand in you again. All you have to do is trust me."

"You won't let him hurt me?"

"Promise."

She had always had the best smile. It was rare, but when it showed it could light up a room. It didn't look like a great deal had changed for Mandy. He didn't know what had happened between the time he had run and then, but she found herself wrapped up with someone that was willing to use her for whatever he wanted her for. Jacob wasn't fool enough to think that their task force could make a huge change in the dark world in which they worked, but this case… This case was personal. If he could help her, that might really mean something in the end.

* * *

It had been a longer Saturday in the office than usual, but at least they had information to show for it. Hansen and Landers had picked a dangerous set of marks. A bookie, a couple of shell corporations that were leading back to shady dealing, but the last one had been the worse. It looked like the two had tried to con a member of the mob in New York and that's why they were scurrying away. Ressler wasn't sure exactly what had put these two on Red's list, but Cooper had set he and Meera on the case while Jacob was out. The fact that his partner had a connection to it was just another question he wasn't certain he wanted the answer to quite yet. After. He would dig into it after the case was closed.

Ressler sighed as he rapped his knuckles against the outer door hard enough that he could be heard. He waited a moment until he saw Jacob moving to answer it, looking tired but still wide awake, even if he was supposed to be resting. "Hope I didn't wake you up."

"No, come here. Something's happened."

He hated that tone. It was clipped and focused and almost always meant trouble. Ressler followed his friend reluctantly, shutting the door behind him. His dread grew as he spotted the woman sitting at Jacob's dining table. "What the hell, Jake?"

"She came to me for help," Jacob answered. "Breathe, Ress. I was going to bring this to you. I just wanted to get the full story first."

Ressler could almost feel his blood boil. These were the moments when he remembered just why he'd broken Jacob's nose when they'd first met. He just didn't _get_ it sometimes. Protocols were there to be followed, not bent to the point of breaking. Not only was he on medical leave, but he'd welcomed a fugitive into his home like it was nothing and didn't seem to see the problem with it. "No, you should have brought her in the moment she showed," Ressler growled.

His partner blinked at him. "Ress, it's not like I wasn't going to tell you. I was just-"

"You _know_ her, Jake. Do you know what it looks like when she just shows up and your immediate reaction isn't to bring her in?"

"And who's going to know how long she's been here?" Jacob huffed and Ressler resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"I'm taking her in, Jake."

"Well that was the plan anyway. Let me grab my coat-"

"You're not coming."

Jacob stopped. "Of course I am. She knows me. She's been telling me everything and-"

"And now she'll tell us everything. You don't need to be anywhere near this case, Jacob. You and I both know you're too close to it to make rational decisions."

The younger man stiffened at that. "My judgement on this is fine, Ress. What's going on?"

Ressler glanced past him at the woman who looked very nervous at the table and then back to his friend, leaning in and lowering his voice. "You made damn sure I stepped away from the rest of the team this morning, you told me she hadn't contacted you-"

"She hadn't then."

"- and you didn't call this in immediately. I know enough to know that you don't talk about the time in your life when you knew her and I'd assumed that's why you didn't want Meera or Cooper to hear, but-"

"You don't trust me in this," Jacob acknowledged softly.

"I think your judgement is off, and when that happens you go from working around the rules to throwing them out."

"I promised her I'd protect her, Ress," Jacob said lowly.

Ressler sighed. It wasn't often Jacob for emotionally involved in a case, but when he did it always got messy. "What the hell happened there?" he asked, regretting the question as soon as it had left his mouth. He had avoided it for so long and Jacob had been happy enough to let him. Jacob found entertainment in delving into people's personal lives and logging away pieces of information for later use. His ability to do that made him an exceptional field agent and often an irritating friend. Ressler, though, tended to steer clear of subjects people didn't want to talk about in his personal life. He did enough interrogating for his work. It was always difficult when the two worlds collided.

Jacob glanced back at Hansen and swallowed hard, his jaw setting in a way that his partner recognized as a subtle sign of nerves. Ressler wasn't getting his answer. Not right then, anyway. "We're good, Mandy," he told the woman sitting at his table. "I trust Ress. He's going to get you in and he's going to protect you."

"Why can't you?"

His lips thinned out. "Because I'm not on the case. He is. I didn't leave without making sure you were safe, did I?" She shook her head and Jacob offered her one of his more charming smiles. "And now I'm trusting you to my partner. You'll be okay. Just tell him everything you told me."

Ressler watched as the young woman nodded very slowly, stepping forward and looking at him. Jacob was right about one thing, she didn't strike him as the mastermind behind all of this. She was terrified of whatever Landers had gotten her into, but she was willing to put her trust in Jacob - and in turn, her trust in Ressler - to help her. The older man offered her a small smile. "Come on. Let's get you to a secure location." He risked a glance back at his partner. "Thank you."

"Yeah, well," Jacob grumbled, looking down at his shoes. "Loop me in, okay?"

"I will."

Ressler led Hansen out the front door and heard Jacob shut it behind them. She paused at the passenger door of his SUV and turned her intense green eyes on him. "When I knew Jacob, when we were kids, it took a lot to earn his trust."

"Still does," Ressler acknowledged.

She smiled a little. "I'm glad he finally found people like you then."

Ressler stood there for half a moment, not sure how to respond to that acknowledgement, before he swallowed hard and motioned to the door. "Let's get moving."

He circled around the vehicle as she opened the door, but he didn't quite make it there before the gunshot echoed through the residential neighborhood.

* * *

Jacob pushed at the sinking feeling that had settled deep in his chest. He was usually in control of himself, his actions, and his emotions, but at the moment he could feel that control wavering dangerously. He did his best not to think about his last foster home. He'd lived in plenty of places that had sent him on because he wasn't what they had expected, but that had been the one where he had been willing to do anything to escape it. He did his best these days not to focus on it. There were new nightmares in his adult life to handle rather than reliving the ones from his childhood. His time with Kelly and Bruce had helped tremendously, knowing that not every couple that he might have wanted to like him would shuffle him off again. They hadn't been cruel and they had been absurdly patient with the troubled teen that they'd taken in, and while Jacob certainly had his share of quirks, as Kelly so kindly put it, he was certain that if they hadn't taken him in he could have traveled down a much different path than he had taken with them.

Seeing Mandy again dragged everything buried to the top, and of course Ressler had asked him. It had taken a long while, but he had grown to trust him more than anyone else he'd ever worked with. The only person that knew more about him than Donald Ressler was Liz. Even so, that didn't mean he was ready to talk about _everything_ he'd seen and done over the years, especially not with his straight-laced friend.

The gunshot and scream from the street came almost simultaneously and Jacob turned so fast he nearly toppled over. He took off in a sprint down the short hallway, grabbing a spare firearm that he kept tucked away in a drawer in the livingroom, and was out the front door without pause. Ressler was yelling, crouched down at the front of the FBI issued SUV and Mandy was crouched by the passenger door with her hands pressed against her ears, another terrible and terrified scream escaping her as a bullet pinged far too close for comfort.

It took a moment, but Jacob spotted the shooter dodging around a car to avoid getting hit with Ressler's returned fire. He took aim and the man sunk around the other side. Jacob was halfway down the sidewalk towards them when bullets came from a different direction and he heard a yelp of pain escape his partner. "Ressler!" he shouted, returning fire as best he could now that it was coming from both sides. _This_ was going to be fun explaining to the neighbors.

Ressler waved at him from where he was crouched down and Jacob took another shot, this one making contact with one of the two shooters and he watched him go down hard. He turned his attention to Mandy. She looked up, eyes wide, and without warning started towards him. He started to shout a warning, but it didn't make it from his throat as she stumbled forward, a dazed expression taking the place of her fearful one, and red blossomed out across her blouse. Jacob darted forward as her knees gave out and skidded to her side on the ground. He risked a glance over, watching Ressler take out the second shooter, and his friend pulled himself up from the street, the blood on his arm showing that he'd only been clipped by a bullet.

"I don't have my phone on me," Jacob called out and Ressler nodded, pulling his own out and started dialing. The younger man turned his attention back to Mandy. "Hey, keep your eyes open. You're good. You're okay. Look at me."

"There were two," she said softly.

"Yeah."

"Ambulance is on it's way," Ressler said from behind.

Green eyes blinked heavily. "Hurts."

Jacob grimaced and pressed his hand carefully against the wound, trying to staunch some of the blood. "I know it does. I took three a few years ago and it hurt like hell. I'm still here though. You're going to be fine." He closed his eyes, both thankful that Liz was far away from this and wishing that she could be there to tell him that everything he was saying was true. There was something in her voice that could always reassure him, no matter what the situation, and right now he needed that. As his childhood friend's eyes slipped closed, he needed that more than anything.

* * *

TBC

Notes: So I have gotten very little writing done in the last couple of days, but I was still far enough ahead to go ahead and post today. Hopefully I'll be able to get back to the actual writing either this evening or tomorrow. Crossing my fingers for it.

Next time - The task force track down their blacklister and Liz comes home with news that might break her husband's heart.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Eleven**

It almost physically hurt to look at him. Jacob wasn't a man that lost control of his emotions very often, but at the moment he looked like he was just barely holding on. They had taken Hansen back into surgery and Jacob was refusing to call Liz. It wasn't like he could give her the full story anyway and he had promised her early in their relationship not to lie to her. That left Ressler lingering in the OR waiting room, unwilling to leave his friend entirely alone with demons that he hadn't quite seen more than the shadows of. He watched the younger man take a seat, face blank, and slump down in the chair to wait. "You should call Liz."

He looked up from behind his glasses. The rims were thicker than the ones he'd worn in school or the rimless ones he kept for those rare occasions when they had been chasing down Reddington that he'd chosen them over contacts. These were designed more for everyday wear. Now that Ressler thought about it, when he'd been sidelined for those nearly three years he'd rarely seen his friend out of glasses. He'd complained about being put on desk duty, but there must have been parts of him that had been very comfortable with his quieter life. It had been filled with fewer secrets and much fewer near death experiences, both for Jacob himself and the precious few people in his life he cared about.

"I'll tell her about it when she gets home," Jacob sighed, reaching up to pluck his glasses from his nose and try to work some the tension out with his fingers.

"How much do you tell her?" Ressler asked carefully.

"Probably more than I should. The deal was that I wouldn't lie to her. She knows how I am, and I don't blame her for not wanting to always second guess her husband. This job… You find yourself coming up with a story for everything because it's easier."

Ressler snorted. "No kidding." He didn't blame Jake, not really. Audrey had left because of the secrets. He didn't want to see the same happen to his partner.

"You asked about what happened," Jacob said, his voice barely audible, and he glanced around as if to verify that they were alone. "Tony Douglas, the foster dad in my last home, was a drunk. He hid it well enough but he used to beat on Mandy and me pretty hard. One day I fought back. He went backwards down the stairs and snapped his neck."

Jacob wasn't looking at him as he spoke and his expression was entirely closed off. Ressler felt a chill settle over him.

"I was fourteen. I panicked and ran. I left her there to get stuck in the aftermath because, really, I'm not sure it crossed my mind to do anything else. I thought they'd throw me in prison or something."

"Kelly and Bruce got your records sealed to protect you from it," Ressler murmured.

"They wanted to give me a chance. Kelly's brother was a lawyer in New York then and he got the judge to rule it self defence. There was enough evidence I guess." He ran a hand through his dark hair. "I'd appreciate it if this stays between us. Liz is the only other person that knows."

Ressler leaned forward and finally caught his friend's gaze. "Listen, I'm not going to pretend to know what you went through then, but I know you now, Jake. This… What happened then, you got a second chance. You took it and you made something of it. That has to count for something."

A slow, sort of quirked smile tilted one side of his mouth. "Thanks, Ress. It's always fun seeing you try to get all emotional and stuff."

The older man snorted and rolled his eyes. "Last time I try to help you out, pal."

The smile turned a little more real. "Thanks."

"Yeah."

Jacob sighed. "I guess the thing is… I got a second chance I didn't really deserve. She deserved one and didn't get it. I'm not always the best at doing the right thing, but I should help her. I want to help her."

"We will," Ressler promised. "We're going to do everything we can."

A doctor came from behind the double doors and both men perked up, Jacob rising to his feet. Ressler remained where he was. It was too soon. She shouldn't be out of surgery yet.

"I'm sorry, Agent Phelps, but Ms Hansen didn't make it through. Is there someone that you need to call to-"

"No," Jacob said softly. "She didn't have anyone. I'll take care of it."

The doctor nodded and said something about paperwork. When he was gone, Ressler stood slowly and approached his friend. "You okay?"

"Yep," he said shortly.

"I'm not going to be able to talk you into staying out of this, am I?"

"Nope."

The older man pulled a deep breath in. "I'll make you a deal. You'll run point from the Post Office, but you don't go out in the field."

"Ress, I-"

"It's that or you go home."

"Is this because you don't think I'm physically ready to jump into this or that you think I'm emotionally compromised?"

Ressler took a moment, studying him. "Both," he said honestly, "and I'm not willing to give up my partner today, no matter how pissed you are."

Jacob blinked at him for a moment and looked as if all of his arguments had lost their backing. "Deal," he said at last.

"Good." Ressler swallowed hard. "We're going to catch this bastard, Jake."

"I know. Ress?"

"Huh?"

"When we do, don't let me anywhere near him."

* * *

Ressler had finally talked Jacob into going home and sleeping for what he could of the very few hours left to that night. No one would have been there anyway, his friend had reminded him, and they were useless if they couldn't think. Jacob hated when Ress was right.

It took a while to get everything put together and get the needed personnel in for a Sunday morning, but once things started moving they moved quickly. Meera gave Jacob a long look when he walked into the war room without a word, but shrugged it off as Ressler followed in. "Okay, people. Hansen was killed last night in a hit. She was attempted to turn herself in to turn against her partner in return for protection."

"Landers has been running a scam on dangerous criminals with the help of a third party," Jacob continued. "This third party was captured by their latest mark which turned out to be a mid-ranking mob member. A hit was placed on Landers and Hansen. Landers is still out there. We find him, arrest him, and he should lead us to the third party that was the real mastermind to all of this."

"I didn't realise you were cleared to be back," Meera murmured.

"I'm not leaving the Post Office," Jacob said pointedly, feeling Ress' gaze on him for it.

"Well, while you two were tracking down Hansen, I found a lead on Landers," Meera said, something in her voice indicating that she knew there was more to the situation than either of them would say, but she was letting it slide. "He's set a meet with our mobster."

"Erik Volken," Aram read off as the man's photo appeared on the large screen. "Flew into DC late last night and has connections linked to the two men at Agent Phelps' home."

Jacob could feel Cooper's gaze on him. He was going to have a hell of a time explaining it in his report, but at least his boss was willing to wait until then. For now, they were focused on catching the bad guys.

"Agent Malik and I will be leading the team in. Be ready for resistance, but we need to try to bring these guys in alive if possible," Ressler stated firmly.

"We've reached out to the New York field office and they will take custody of Volken," Meera followed up. "Let's bring them in."

Jacob hung back as Ressler and Meera led their team down to the lift that would take them to the garage. He wanted to be with them, but he supposed he should be grateful Ressler had pulled whatever strings needed to get him at least in the Post Office. Liz was going to kill him when she found out.

"We'll get him, Agent Phelps. The man that killed your friend."

Jacob blinked, looking over to Aram who was giving him a look so sympathetic that it could have hurt. Jacob, though, wasn't entirely sure what to do with it.

Aram looked a little sheepish. "I guess I just assumed, but, why else would she have gone to you when you weren't on the case?"

"Thanks, I guess," Jacob managed, turning his attention to the screen. "We should focus on what's going on with Ressler and Meera. We're their eyes and ears, right? Show me what I'm doing here."

"Right," Aram said, a little flustered and pulled a map up on the screen. "The meet is, supposedly, here, and we have video cameras here, here, and here that we have tapped into. Audio comes from the wires once they turn it on so really they're _our_ ears, but, on the side, I'm looking into the financial transactions to see if I can get an idea who this third party is. I've narrowed it down to three possibilities, and I'm looking into who has the most solid connection to Landers, but so far no one is coming up. Ms Hansen didn't know the third party, right?"

"She never met him is what she said."

Aram frowned at the screen, pulling up three mug shots. "So far I haven't found anything, and-"

"This guy," Jacob said, pointing to one of the mugshots. "Mandy just didn't know that she knew him. This guy passed through the foster home."

"How did you..? Never mind," Aram said quickly, shaking his head. "Are you sure?"

"Can you pull the feeds up yet? If they're there, I bet we spot him with the others."

Jacob watched as the tech did as asked, his hands flying over the keys faster than he could follow. He wasn't incompetent when it came to technology, not by a long shot, but people like Aram certainly made him feel that way.

"Got it, got it," he mumbled from his chair. "Here we go!"

The screen lit up with the feed, sectioned off into three different angles. And there they were, moving into view and just having arrived to the meet, as they had hoped they would be. "Bring it in on this guy," Jacob said, pointing to one of the men. He was dress a little differently with a baseball cap pulled low over his face. Matt Reiley, he thought his name had been, but he couldn't be sure. He hadn't lasted long in the home, but he'd been one of Douglas' favourites. Jacob had broken his arm in a scuffle at the school they attended at one point.

Aram spun the camera around and the angle cleared. "That's him," Jacob mumbled and grabbed for his phone, Ressler's on speed dial. "We found our third party. Matthew Reiley. Looks like he's been in and out of jail over the years and… Aram, keep scrolling there." Jacob's eyes moved quickly over the information that Aram had pulled up. "Looks like his last cellmate is directly related to Volken. A cousin."

" _This was a setup from the beginning,_ " Ressler acknowledged on the other end.

"Get a couple of desperate but talented thieves to do your dirty work for you, yeah. Question is if Reiley was trying to play Volken too."

" _We'll find out when we bring them in. Good catch, both of you. Maybe we'll put you back on desk, Jake._ "

"That's not funny."

" _It's hilarious,_ " his partner answered and cut the line. Jacob rolled his eyes and shook his head, turning back to watch the arrest. Landers was approaching the mobster. It was silent, just video feeds until the team got close, but they knew the moment that Ressler and the team came on scene. It took a moment for audio to kick on, but no one looked happy at the video feed. Reiley least of all. Whatever ultimate con he was trying to pull really had blown up in his face.

"I should be asking you what she was doing there," Cooper said from behind.

"We knew each other when we were young," Jacob answered, forcing the honesty from his lips. "She heard I was in law enforcement and came to me for help."

"So the link was to you," Cooper mused. "Any idea what Reddington's play was?"

"Not yet, sir."

Cooper nodded solemnly. "Keep looking. I don't want whatever it is to catch us by surprise."

"You don't trust him, sir?"

"Do you?"

Jacob snorted. "I don't pretend that I do."

"I'd like to, but not until I know his angle. You should get home, Agent Phelps. You're not even supposed to be here."

"Yes sir," he answered, not wanting to push his luck more than he already had. It was getting late and Liz would be home. Now that the case was over his brain might finally let the emotions of it hit home, and when it did, she was the only one he wanted anywhere near him.

* * *

Elizabeth Phelps had come home to an empty townhouse. She looked all over, but she didn't call. She didn't think she could speak to him until they were face to face. The entire flight back from her conference she had struggled with Reddington's demand. It wasn't like she could just ask Jacob what that kind of knowledge being released would do to his career, not without a lot of questions being asked, and Reddington must have known that. They were just days away from bringing their little boy home, and as she stood in the living room, looking at the stroller and the crib and all the preparation that the last year or more had brought with it, she felt a strange sensation bubbling up in her chest. She tried to swallow it down, but the sob worked its way up as her vision blurred dangerously and she sank back onto the couch, real tears starting to run down her cheeks as she watched the world that they had built tremble dangerously.

She blinked hard, doing her best to push them away as she heard a key unlocking the front door. Liz wiped at her eyes and ran her hand through her hair, sending it falling in all directions. If it hurt her or not - and it _shouldn't_. She was a trained operative. She had learned a long time ago how to crush her own emotions down and into submission. She had this under control - this had to be done. For them. For him. He just didn't know it. If he did, he would understand, and given time he would forgive her. He always did.

"Liz?" her husband called as he opened the door. "You home yet?"

"Yeah," she managed, her voice steadier than she expected but still quivering ever so slightly. "In here, babe."

"Hey," Jacob greeted as he came around the corner. He looked exhausted and part of her wanted to ask him where he'd been when he was supposed to be at home and resting. She needed to focus though, or she'd talk herself out of this.

She stood from her place and reached out to him. He took her hand and pulled her forward into a crushing hug without warning. "I missed you," he whispered, pressing a kiss into her hair. Damn was he making this harder than it already was.

"Jacob, honey, I need to talk to you."

He pulled back, blue eyes a little bloodshot behind contacts, like he'd had trouble sleeping the night before. "What is it? Are you okay?"

"Yeah… I just…" She swallowed hard, steeling herself. She had to focus. She had to be calm. This was for them, if he knew it or not. This was all for them. "I can't do this," she breathed at last.

"Do what?" her husband asked, his voice matching hers and she forced herself to look him in the eye as she took hold of his hands.

"The adoption."

Jacob went a couple of shades paler, all of his emotions lingering just behind his blue eyes. "What? Why?" he stuttered out, his shoulders slumping like the world had just been put on them. "We've talked about it, Liz. We were… We were ready. You _said_ we were ready. We talked about it and-"

"I just can't," she snapped, cutting him off before he could go on about how they'd planned and how they'd build their lives around this decision for the past year and a half. How it meant so much to him to pull a child out of the life he lived and give them what Kelly and Bruce had given him. She couldn't hear how much it meant to him or see the heartbreak that was so rare in him flash across his face, those walls of his be damned. She couldn't do any of it, because she knew she would crumble. She needed to bring him back around. "Babe, we need to focus on us right now."

She didn't know what she had expected him to say to that, but she hadn't expected him to close down. It took him longer sometimes to figure out exactly what he was feeling, but he tried so hard to be honest with her. It had been years since he shut her out like that, but she recognized all the signs. He pulled his hands from hers, his eyes taking on a sort of careful steely look, and his jaw set carefully. He didn't pause as he turned, grabbing his keys from the bowl by the door, and he slammed the door hard behind him without a word. He left her there in their living room alone, surrounded by the toys and the reminders of the plans she had just thrown away. Even as she tried to remind herself that it had been for him, the lie rang empty in her mind as she sank to the floor. She had done it for her because she didn't want to lose the first good thing that had happened in her life. She didn't want to lose him, but in trying to hold on, she might have done just that.

* * *

He had barely gotten home. The arrests had been made and Cooper had told him to enjoy what was left of his weekend and deal with the paperwork the next morning, and he hadn't needed to be told twice for once. He was exhausted, and all Donald Ressler wanted to do was to have a beer and an early night. He'd tossed his jacket over the back of the couch and had put a frozen pizza in the oven when a hard knock came at his front door. He hadn't been expecting anyone, so he glanced out the peephole to see a familiar figure in his hallway. "Hey, Liz not make it home yet?" he asked as he pulled the door open.

Jacob stood there, his hands stuffed deep in his jean pockets, and he finally looked up. Ressler was fairly certain he'd never seen the younger man cry before, but all the signs were there with the way his eyes were rimmed red and he was still trembling just a little like he was barely holding himself together. "I think she's going to leave me," he whispered brokenly and Ressler took a step back, letting him in.

"Liz? What the hell makes you say that?" he asked, shutting the door behind him. "That woman loves you." He watched his friend move sluggishly over and sink into a chair. Ressler shook his head and reached for another beer, popping the tab off of it and crossing the living room to offer it. The dark haired man still hadn't answered. "Jake?"

"She canceled the adoption."

Now that wasn't something he'd expected. "Did she say why?"

Jacob shook his head a little and leaned forward, elbows braced against his knees. "She said we needed to work on us. I didn't even know there was anything wrong with us."

Ressler pulled in a breath, sitting carefully on the couch.

"This job - _Reddington_ \- it's destroying my life, Ress."

"It does that," Ressler answered, a bit of regret making it into his voice.

"Is it worth it? What we do? I know you believe in it."

"I don't know," he answered roughly. He wasn't sure, not after Audrey, that he could tell him it was worth _that_ price, at any rate. Not after he'd watched his own life shatter into a million pieces while he was focused on chasing the man down that they were now getting their cases from. He couldn't offer Jacob anything other than understanding of what he was going through, not really, so instead he reached for his own drink and slouched back against the couch, that understanding stretching between them and adding weight to the silence.

* * *

She had waited and waited, thinking that he had just needed to blow off some steam before he said something he knew he would regret. A lap around the neighborhood and he would be back. After an hour of waiting, though, Liz called. His phone rolled straight to voicemail, and she finally picked herself up off of the living room floor. She knew where her husband was.

Liz had only been to Donald Ressler's apartment once before, but the thing that had struck her the most was how sketchy it looked on the outside versus how well polished it was on the inside. She had asked at the time and Ressler had laughed, saying that he'd gotten the place for next to nothing towards the end of the time that they'd been chasing Reddington all across the world. After Audrey had left and they'd stationed him back in DC full time, he'd had put it together and he'd made sure it looked nice. He'd had the time to do it then.

Now she stood outside the door, uncertain of what she could say to smooth out the situation. She couldn't retract what she'd said, but she didn't want to lose him because of it either. She knew how much this adoption had meant to him. Liz pulled in a deep breath and tapped her knuckles against the door.

Silence followed for several long moments and she had about decided that the two had gone out for a beer or something when the lock came undone from the inside. The door opened and Ressler stood looking worn and tired. He didn't say anything at first, but just looked at her like he would need some sort of an explanation before he bothered to acknowledge her.

Liz pulled in a deep breath. "Is Jacob here?"

Ressler seemed to weigh the words for a moment before shifting his weight, moving slightly to the side to give Liz a clear view through the living room and to where her husband stood on his best friend's balcony, leaned against the railing with a lit cigarette dangling from his fingers, the embers burning bright as the sun had long since set. "He'd stopped," she muttered, indignation seeping into her voice.

"That's what you're going to give him hell over?" Ressler huffed and Liz bit her lip.

"I guess he told you."

"He mentioned it." Ressler heaved a sigh. "Listen, what goes on between the two of you, that's your business, but no matter how crazy he can drive me, that man out there is my friend. I've known him for years, and it takes a hell of a lot to put him where you've put him this evening."

"I'm not trying to hurt him."

"Could have fooled me. What could have made you think that dropping something like that on him after what happened this weekend was-"

"What do you mean?" Liz asked, cutting him off.

Ressler stared at her. "He didn't tell you?"

Dread started to seep in a little and she shook her head.

"Amanda Hansen was shot and killed last night. Jacob was right there."

It was Liz's turn to stare. She knew that name. Jacob had told her about the girl in his last foster home that he'd been as close to as he ever got to anyone in those days. As far as she knew, he hadn't spoken to her or seen her since the day he'd left, but the fact that Reddington had approached her about what had happened in those final days there and the girl he'd known had resurfaced in his life all within the same weekend couldn't be a coincidence. "Excuse me," Liz said as she slipped past Ressler into his apartment and straight through to the patio door. She tugged it open and Jacob looked up, startled, and dropped the cigarette almost immediately and crushed it under his boot. Liz didn't wait for him to make up an excuse, but instead moved forward, wrapping her arms around his middle and hugging him. Slowly, tentatively, he returned the embrace. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't know about Mandy."

She felt him tense in her arms and then tighten his grip. "It's been a hell of a last couple of days," he said shakily.

They stood there like that for a few moments, holding on tightly, but he never reached up to stroke her hair as he did when they were coming down from a fight. Instead he pulled in an unsteady breath. "I need you to be honest with me, Liz."

"Yeah," she managed, hoping that she could.

"Are you leaving me?"

She looked up at him, finding his eyes a little glassy. She'd only seen him cry once since she'd met him and as she reached up to run a thumb under his eye she found her own vision blurring. Part of her - the part that had been so damn well trained over the last twenty years of her life - knew that this was dangerous. This man made her feel things that she hadn't let herself feel in a long time, but she didn't want to stop. "No, babe," she whispered, her hand snaking back to the back of his neck. "I love you. I'm not… That's not what this is."

"Then what is it, Liz? Please, just help me wrap my mind around it."

She closed her eyes and pulled in a steadying breath. "Reddington."

"What about him?"

"He… terrifies me. He had you shot, you're just getting over being _poisoned…_ Jacob, I can't do this alone. I don't _want_ to raise a child by myself. I want to raise them with you."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Honey, you can't say that. You can't _know_ that." She tipped up on her toes, her lips pressing against his. "Finish this. Whatever it is that has to do with Reddington, finish it and we can get our lives back. I want to have children with you, Jacob, I just don't want to do it alone."

He nodded slowly, the words looking as if they were slowly making their way through the pain he found himself in. "I hate him," he whispered, his voice tight.

"Me too," she answered and leaned in, pressing her cheek against his chest. Slowly his arms came up around her and she felt his fingers slowly trail through her hair in a soothing motion. They weren't whole, Reddington had made sure of that, but at least they weren't broken. That had to count for something.

* * *

TBC

Notes: So I was a little hesitant about posting this up tonight because Friday nights can be a little slow and I really would love some feedback on this chapter. The adoption situation broke my heart in canon, but I knew it had to end here as well. With everything they're about to face, they can't bring a kid into it. Every review I receive makes me smile so much, and I'd really love to hear your thoughts on this chapter especially.

Also, there's a chance I'll have another chapter up on Sunday afternoon, but if not, it may be Tuesday or Wednesday before I'll be able to update again. I have a medical procedure scheduled for Monday, so I'll likely be offline that day for the most part and possibly part of Tuesday as well. We'll just see.

Next time - Ressler pays Red a visit to try to get some answers and finds himself in a bad position when Red is attacked. Anyone want to make a guess as to who will be doing the attacking? ;)


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Twelve**

Donald Ressler had never put a great deal of stock in coincidences. The fact that the Hansen case - one linking back to Jacob's childhood in the foster care system that had led to his adoption - coincided with Liz's decision to back out of their own adoption proceedings last second seemed too close to be anything else other than related in some form or fashion. They _shouldn't_ have anything to do with each other, not with Liz not having been in town and canceling the adoption before she even knew that Amanda Hansen had been there, much less that her husband had worked the outskirts of a case involving her, but there was something that tugged at Ressler's mind over it, and when Reddington went silent for the week following, not providing any new blacklisters or cases, it only pushed that uncomfortable suspicion to the forefront. He had demanded that Jacob was on the team, and had refused to help if he wasn't. The link was there, but Ressler had no idea what would have driven Reddington to want the adoption to fall through, much less how he orchestrated it. He just couldn't shake the feeling that the Concierge of Crime had been behind it in some way, shape, or form. Maybe Jacob's paranoia was finally rubbing off on him.

The Post Office had been silent for almost a week. For once, Jacob had taken his sick leave and simply stayed away. With two hard emotional blows back to back, even he needed a break and Ressler had left him to it. He'd used the time to catch up on the mountain of paperwork that he had pushed back over his increasingly busy schedule chasing down blacklisters handed over to the team. It was so quiet that day, though, that when he finished up his last report and left it on Cooper's desk, he was left with far too much time to think about the connection that he'd been trying to push to the back of his mind. It didn't take long before he grabbed his jacket, checked the tracking information for Reddington's chip, and was out the door. He probably wouldn't get a straight answer from the man, but he might at least get something from him.

Reddington was in town, surprisingly enough, and apparently staying at some monstrosity of a house just outside of DC. Ressler parked on the curb outside, letting out a low whistle as he stepped out and double checking the address on his phone. Well, never let it be said that Raymond Reddington didn't hide out in style.

Rain started coming down as he made his way up the long drive and to the front door, just barely making it to the porch before it began to fall in earnest. He pulled one hand out of his jacket pocket and tapped his knuckles against the door, waiting. It took a moment, but the door finally swung open to reveal a tiny little woman, middle aged, with a duster in hand. "May I help you?"

"I'm looking for Raymond Reddington," Ressler said, glancing past her.

"There's no one here by that name," she answered, and had the door halfway closed before Ressler heard a voice behind her.

"It's quite alright, Martha. Let Agent Ressler in. He's not here to cause any trouble, are you, Donald?"

The FBI agent offered the woman a smile and slipped past her into the house. If it had looked nice on the outside, it was exceptional on the inside.

"And to what do I owe this visit?" Reddington asked from a chair by the fire, his book set in his lap with a finger marking his place.

Ressler's gaze swept across the room. "Nice place you've got here."

"Oh, I'm just watching it for a friend. He's having some remodelling done on the back end so things are a bit messier than I prefer, but my goodness does he have a library. He has everything from the classics to books not quite yet published. My favourites, though, are the ones that were never published. You'd be amazed what some of the most brilliant minds come up with that are never seen by the general public. A shame, really, but I doubt that's what you tracked my chip for to talk about."

"The Hansen case," Ressler said, glancing around to make sure they were alone. Dembe and Luli were often at least on the outskirts if Reddington was there. It wasn't that the agent trusted them any less than he trusted the CI, but he'd questioned if he should bring this up at all. "Why did you bring that one to us?"

"Why did I hand you a couple of blacklisters that led to an arrest of a particularly nasty mob member that also may have robbed a friend of mine of a sizable amount as well?"

Ressler snorted.

"You don't believe me?"

"I know that you had my partner shot three years ago and then when you showed up out of nowhere that you demanded that he was part of the team. No one else, just Phelps."

"Don't be jealous, Donald. I didn't request you because I knew you were already on board with this little task force. You would follow orders easily enough. Agent Phelps was the only one that needed persuading."

"Why?"

"Well you're a little obsessive if I may be blunt," Reddington murmured.

"Why Jacob? I'm not stupid, Reddington, no matter what you may think of me, and I'm not blind either. You're using us to follow-"

"Well of _course_ I'm using you," the older man chuckled, thunder following a flash of light outside. "Do you think I'd be involved in this if I weren't getting something from it? Really, Donald, that's hardly the way to convince me of your intelligence."

"You're using us to follow a trail of some kind. What does it have to do with him?"

"That's my business. I can assure you that I mean him no harm."

"He lost the adoption," Ressler snapped. "Don't tell me you didn't have _something_ to do with that."

"My goodness, and how would I have? Do you think I just waltzed up to Mrs Phelps and encouraged her to cancel?"

Ressler levelled a glare at him, doing his best to hide the discomfort that his words brought with them. Jacob hated having Reddington even aware of Liz's existence, but the younger man was convinced that Reddington had an interest of some kind in her. In all likelihood, it was just meant to get under his skin, but the idea of Reddington approaching her directly was enough to set even Ressler on edge. "I don't know what you did, but you obviously got what you wanted. Stay out of his personal life, Reddington. We may be forced to deal with you at work, but Jake has worked hard to build a life with Liz. You don't have any place there."

Reddington's expression turned solemn, but both men tensed as the lights went out suddenly, the fire the only source of light left in the room. The older man laid his book to the side and stood. He moved to a desk to the side of the room and pulled a pistol from a drawer. "Are you armed, Donald?"

"It was just the storm," Ressler answered a little irritably.

"I don't think so."

Ressler was halfway to pulling his gun from its holster when the front door burst open, gunfire filling the hallway.

"This way," Reddington snapped, motioning to a door opposite of the one Ressler had entered through.

A bullet pinged off the wall as he followed, returning fire. His phone buzzed in his pocket and Ressler ducked down, pressing his back against the wall, and pulled it out, barely risking a glance at the name. "Jake, track Reddington's… Jake?" A hard click signified the dropped call and he looked down, _no_ _signal_ showing. Well, that would have been too lucky. "They've jammed the signal."

"We can go out the kitchen door. This way," Reddington said.

Ressler risked a glance behind him. "Who the hell are these people?"

"I wish I knew."

They rounded the corner together and Reddington jumped back as the wall erupted, bullets shredding it and aimed at them. Ressler returned fire and tried to duck back around a corner, but pain shot through his leg, taking him to the ground with a yelp of pain.

"Donald!" Reddington shouted and Ressler heard another shot go off and the thud of a body hitting the ground. He couldn't quite look up as he grasped at the source of the pain, somehow hoping to will it to stop. "There'll be more," Reddington said from over him. "Can you stand?"

Ressler forced himself to focus. Slowly, carefully, he looked down to his leg and instantly regretted it. He had a deathgrip on it, but blood had already soaked his pants leg. There was no way he'd be able to put weight on it.

"We're not both going to make it out," Reddington murmured.

The injured agent didn't like that tone. Reddington was going to leave him to bleed out on the floor. As the other man scooped up Ressler's dropped weapon, he realized it was more than just that. "Reddington, don't you dare leave me unarmed," he growled out.

"You and I aren't finished yet, Agent Ressler," Reddington said firmly and bent down, pulling Ressler up without warning. The younger man gave a sharp cry that the other ignored, pulling him down the hall with purpose.

Reddington half dragged, half carried Ressler into a room to the side, not bothering to close the door behind. Instead he moved over to what looked like a solid wall and shifted Ressler enough to press a panel, revealing a door.

Ressler felt the world pulse dangerously as Reddington pulled him inside, this door closing and latching behind them. "A safe room," he breathed.

"Yes, but I'm afraid we're not quite there yet," Reddington said as he shifted Ressler to lean as he threw back a carpet to reveal a hatch and stairs leading down into the basement level panic room.

Ressler shook his head. "No, I'm not going to make it down those."

"Of course you are, Donald. That door won't hold those men forever and there will be medical supplies below. If you stay up here you _will_ bleed out."

Ressler glared at the stairs. He didn't have a choice. "Fine."

"There's the spirit," Reddington cheered without any real enthusiasm. He pulled Ressler off the wall and down the stairs.

Ressler was certain he must have passed out because he couldn't quite remember the trip down. When he blinked his eyes open again the door overhead was sliding closed and the lights were flickering on in the room. "Going down," Redington warned and eased him onto a cot. "Keep pressure on that leg and don't let up."

"Who are these guys?" Ressler asked, hearing the slur in his own voice.

"We're about to find out," Reddington said as he moved over and out of Ressler's direct view. "There should be cameras…. There they are. Let's see who we're up against."

There was a pause and Ressler struggled to see. "Who is it?"

Reddington did not look happy. "Anslo Garrick," he breathed as the mangled face became clear on the screen.

* * *

"I need a track on Reddington now," Jacob Phelps barked as he strode into the Post Office. He had extended his leave a few extra days so that he and Liz could wrap up their meetings with the social worker for the canceled adoption - something that he was trying desperately _not_ to think about - and while he wasn't actually due into work until the following day the clipped phone call from Ressler had sent him tearing in.

"I have him stationary at an address in Bethesda," Aram answered, almost immediately. "Is everything okay?"

"I don't know. I called Ressler to ask him something and he sounded like he was in trouble." He leaned over to look at the technician's screen. "Can you pull up his cell location?"

"Already on it, but I'm not getting a signal."

Jacob cursed lowly and straightened.

"Aren't you in a day early?" Meera asked and he turned to her immediately.

"Have you talked to Ress?"

"I think he was going to go follow up with Reddington on something. Everything alright?"

"I'm not sure yet. It could be nothing."

"Agent Phelps?" Aram asked, drawing his attention to him. "I'm showing that an alarm went off very briefly before being cut at this residence. Do you think it has something to do with Mr Reddington?"

"Looks like the day just got exciting," Meera quipped, though she didn't sound quite as enthused about it as the words might imply. "I'll have a team on standby. No reason to bring them down on a suburban neighborhood if it's a false alarm."

"Right. You and I can go check it out."

She nodded and Jacob ran his hand through his hair. Something wasn't right. He knew that much. His partner didn't leave him hanging like that. He leaned back down to Aram's computer, hand braced on the back of the other man's chair. "I need you to find everything you can about the owner of the house, why Reddington would be there… Anything."

"Got it."

"Any idea what Ressler was after?"

"No sir. It's been quiet here this last week."

Jacob snorted. "Leave it to Reddington to screw that up." He glanced back as Meera strode by. "Toss me the keys. I'll drive."

"Oh no. Ressler's warned me about your driving."

The other agent blinked hard. "I'm sorry?"

"From what he's said, I would be too if I let you drive. Come on. Aram's already sent me the address."

Jacob glanced between the CIA agent that was already walking towards the lift and Aram who shrugged. He shook his head and followed. "It's not _that_ bad."

"He said that your driving is only fit for car-chase scenarios, in which I don't plan to be in today, thank you."

"Says the man that I've seen stop a car-chase by slamming the front of _his_ into the side of _theirs_ ," Jacob grumbled as the stepped into the lift.

Meera shot him a slightly uncomfortable look. "Neither of you are allowed to drive again. Ever."

Jacob snorted a laugh. "Let's go see what sort of trouble Reddington has us in this time."

* * *

Ressler was closer to unconsciousness than not when Reddington finished wrapping his leg. Martin, the friend whose house this was, was notoriously paranoid and had stocked his panic room with everything he could possibly need for a full an assault. The man had not actually lived in the house for nearly six weeks after a storm had caused a flood that had damaged the home, but between workers coming in he'd been more than happy to lend it to Red in return for having the Concierge of Crime sweep the home and make sure that no bugs were found left by any of those workers. They weren't done, but Red had promised to send Mr Kaplan back for a full sweep once they were. It worked out for everyone in the end, but now, with Anslo Garrick blowing a hole in the front door, he was sure he'd owe Martin a bit more than a sweep of the residence.

The panic room would be the best money could have bought. Fortified walls, stocked food, and the medical supplies had been superb. Reddington looked down to the pool of blood Ressler's injury had left on the floor and frowned. He had it wrapped up tightly now, the blood stanched for now, but the younger man had lost far too much between the hallway and down the stairs. If he hadn't been injured, they might last a day or so before Garrick made his way through the doors, but as it stood Reddington found himself hoping that that brief phone call with Phelps had been enough to set the other agent on their trail. He wasn't sure the FBI stood a chance of taking Garrick's men down, but perhaps they'd be enough of a distraction that something could be done.

Blue eyes shifted over to look at the screens and found what looked like a finger tapping at one of the cameras. He sighed and moved slowly to the controls, blood stained fingers switching on the audio. "Red? I know you're in there, Red. You can't hide from me."

"Anslo, what a surprise. What brings you to DC?" Reddington answered cheerfully.

The man's scarred face shifted into something Red assumed was supposed to be a smile. It really was more twisted than any smile should have ever been, but that was Garrick. It had always been Garrick. He really wished that bullet had shifted just a little more to the right and done its job.

"I hear you have new friends, but they can't protect you. Looks like you left a trail of blood in your wake. Yours or your pet's?"

"Be careful, Anslo, or someone will start to think you're a little jealous."

A chuckle echoed over the audio feed. "Did you really think that there was a place that you could go that I wouldn't find you, Red? That they could save you? Not from me."

"If I'm to be honest, I haven't given you a thought in years," Reddington answered, attention switching to Ressler as the agent let out a pained sound from the cot. He was far too pale, sweat gathering against his face and blood could be seen starting to seep through the bandages. He moved over to him and the agent gave a sharp cry as Red reached down to inspect it. "Easy, Donald. I'm not trying to hurt you, but I need to make sure we get the bleeding stopped."

The younger man's eyes opened sluggishly and Reddington focused on his work, doing his best to tune Garrick out as the man continued to monologue off all of the wrongs he believed Reddington had committed against him. He really was insufferable.

"How bad?" Ressler managed.

"Well you're not going to be walking out of here on it. Did your call go through to Agent Phelps?"

Ressler blinked, as if he were trying to follow what he was referring to. "He called."

"Yes he did. Just before they cut the lines. Were you able to tell him anything of use?" Reddington asked, keeping his voice low enough that it wouldn't carry for Garrick to hear.

"It's only a matter of time, Red, before we get through this door. We'll blow it off its hinges and I'll drag you out of there in pieces if I must. Nothing is completely impenetrable. Even you know that."

Reddington snorted, but didn't respond to the man speaking over the audio feed. "Donald, focus. Are we on our own here?"

"Jake'll come," Ressle managed, and Red hoped that was true. His own people had been out with the exception of the housekeeper who was very likely dead by this point. If Phelps didn't alert the FBI of their predicament, Anslo would find a way through and he would kill them both.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Thank you for all the well-wishes. I'm back and more or less back to normal. Today was the first time I've gotten to write anything for days now and it was glorious. Okay, I have a favour to ask you guys: At the point that I'm writing on now, Jacob and Ressler are passing around Quantico stories. I have one in mind, but there need to be several, and if they're good enough, they may even spin off into one-shots. Does anyone want to toss in a request for something you'd like to know a bit more about from their time in school together?

Next time - Reddington and Ressler burrow down in their bunker, the feds try to find a way into the house without getting everyone killed, and Jacob proves just how far he's willing to go to protect one of the few people he cares about.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Thirteen**

While Jacob typically reveled in being proven right on his hunches, this was one he would have rather have been wrong about. They had arrived to find that the house - presumably one Reddington had been staying in - had already been taken, but from what they could tell they were at a standstill inside.

"Martin Tallert is the homeowner," the lead officer from the police department explained. "He's been out for a few weeks after the area flooded pretty badly, but he'll have had a panic room."

"That explains why Garrick's not gone yet," Jacob mused. "Any of the repairs still underway? I want to know our ways in before he does."

"I can find that information."

"You and Ressler have dealt with this Garrick before, haven't you?" Meera asked as soon as the officer stepped away.

"Yeah, back in '08 when we were chasing Reddington down."

"What do you know about him?"

Jacob frowned. "He and Reddington worked together for a while until Reddington put a bullet through his face. We never got the full story on what happened, but I'm not sure we would have believed it if we did. He provided intel when we were chasing Reddington down."

"So he's willing to sell out to get to him," Meera murmured.

"I'd imagine that there are some high paying bidders willing to hire him too. What the hell was Ress doing here anyway?"

"I'm not sure. It's been quiet around the Post Office this last week."

"I wasn't there to make my life a living hell so he decided Ressler was his next best I guess," Jacob grumbled, a little bitterness making it into his voice. It may not have been a direct attack, but Reddington had cost him the child that he and Liz had been ready to adopt, and he wasn't exactly ready to forgive just yet. He was still searching down answers, looking for the link that seemed to be the only tie to the cases they were being handed and Reddington: Masha Rostova. He still wasn't sure how they were linked, but he wasn't done searching either. He had to find it. If he could find Rostova he was sure that he would have enough answers to handle the situation effectively. First, though, he had to make sure the bastard didn't get his partner killed.

Sounds of gunfire drew both agents' attention and it died nearly as quickly as it had started. They were at a standstill with Garrick's men until they could talk them down - which could be a stretch - or find a way to get in and make sure that Ressler and Reddington were safe. Jumping into it blind was a good way to get them both killed and take a lot of other agents down as well. "Do we have any way to communicate yet?"

"We're working on wiring through two separate channels. One to the panic room - where we think Red and Ressler are - and one to the frequency Garrick's men are using."

"Tell me Aram is on it," Jacob breathed, looking through what had turned into a crowd of people. Finally he spotted the technician. His table hadn't been set up yet so he was on the curb, typing away on his laptop that was braced on his bent knees.

A pair of brown eyes flickered up as Jacob approached. "Agent Phelps, I know time is tight on this one."

"It is. What do you have?"

"I'm almost into the audio system in the panic room. We should be able to communicate with Agent Ressler and Mr Reddington. Just a moment. Garrick may take a few minutes." His expression lightened. "I've got it. Got it! Agent Ressler, it's Aram Mojtabai. Can you hear me, sir?"

"Aram." It wasn't Ressler's voice, but Reddington's. "Good to hear the FBI got the message. Am I to assume that Agent Phelps' paranoia paid off?"

"Where's Ressler?" Jacob snapped.

There was a pause and some crackling in the line. "Agent Ressler was injured when they breached the house. Martin keeps a well stocked room, but his leg is in bad shape."

Jacob's jaw clenched in the small sign of stress. "How bad?"

"He needs a hospital, Jacob. Get Garrick to pull out. That's the only way this ends well for Donald."

"Save your ass and you'll save his?" the agent growled.

"That's simply the way the chips have fallen," Reddington bit back. "Contrary to your lingering opinion I hold no ill will against you or Donald. We are pinned in here and the only way out is either removing the threat or handing me over to Garrick and his men. I assure you, Agent Phelps, should you be foolish enough to do that, you will be signing Ressler's life away as well."

"Agent Phelps, we have a connection with Garrick," Aram whispered.

Jacob closed his eyes, forcing his voice to remain calm. "Reddington, we're going to get you out. Just keep Ressler alive until we get in there."

* * *

"It's his job to keep you alive," Ressler's shaky voice came from the cot, drawing Reddington's attention. "Jake may not like it, but he'll do it."

Reddington snorted, gaze shifting back to the video screens that showed Garrick's men on the inside and the FBI on the outside. "He'll save my life because you're in here. Small ironies do make life a funny thing, don't they?"

Ressler gave a mirthless chuckle. "Is that why you saved my life? I'm still useful for getting you out?"

"I saved your life because that's what people do," Reddington answered. "What I told your partner is true: I have nothing against either of you. I am well aware of the lengths that you and your team went to to bring me in as well as the lengths you were _willing_ to go. You were doing your jobs."

"And Jake's doing his now."

"You have a lot of faith in your partner to keep his emotions in check," Reddington chuckled. "The man is quite convinced I have some terrible plan for him."

"Can you blame him? Your man put three bullets through him. He nearly bled out in a foreign street."

Reddington's lips thinned, noting the way Ressler's voice had faded a bit at the end of the statement. He stood and moved over, checking his leg and frowning. "Things do change quickly, I suppose, and some aren't as they appear," he murmured. "How are you feeling?"

"Cold," Ressler mumbled.

After a further search of Martin's treasure trove of medical supplies, he had found several hemostatic patches that Reddington had immediately put to use on the FBI agent's leg. As far as he could tell the artery had been partially torn by the shotgun blast. It couldn't have been any more than partial or Ressler would have bled out long before he'd gotten to him with the patch. Even with the bleeding stopped for the time being, Ressler had grown far too pale and seemed to be fading in and out of awareness, and not just because of the pain. Well, not _only_ because of the pain.

Ressler let out a sharp cry suddenly, the sound fading into a pained whimper as he grabbed for the source of the pain. "No," Reddington said, the word leaving him as gently as he could manage. "Your heart is working harder to try to keep up with the blood loss. That's the pain you're feeling."

"You said you got it stopped," Ressler gasped.

"It's a temporary fix. You need a hospital." Blue eyes shifted to the shelf of medical equipment. He needed to buy more time. "What blood type are you, Donald?"

"Why?"

"Humour me."

"B-negative."

"We'll look at that. We do have something in common." The odds had been against it, but apparently the universe had a sense of humour. Or at least it wanted to up Ressler's odds of surviving this fiasco. Reddington could only be thankful his own people had been out when this had happened.

"What are you doing?"

"You're going into shock. The process was only slowed by the patch. Your leg is…" He grimaced. "This should buy us time."

Ressler closed his eyes as Reddington worked, fitting the needle into either arm and setting it up to begin the field blood transfusion. Both men tensed as the entire basement shook dangerously, signs of an explosion sending tremors through it. The walls held, but it was enough to jolt the injured man fully back to consciousness and he grimaced. "Jake better hurry."

* * *

Garrick was toying with negotiator and it was going to drive Jacob mad. Twice Meera had shot him a glare, stopping him halfway to picking the headset off of the negotiator's head and speaking to Garrick directly. They had agreed that letting the terrorist know anything more than was absolutely necessary was dangerous at best and could backfire terribly and give him something to use at worse. Jacob hated it, but she was right. He pulled in a frustrated breath, crossed his arms over his chest, and stepped back.

"Mr Garrick," the negotiator started, but the sound of an explosion caused him to lose the words, all eyes turning to the house as it shook just a little, dust flying out of a newly shattered window. "Mr Garrick, what was that?"

"That? Oh, just a bit of testing. Reddington's door won't hold forever, and when it goes, I'd suggest you back your men away because I guarantee not one of them will be standing at the end of this if they try to stop us from taking him."

"Mr Garrick, the FBI is not letting you walk out of there with Mr Reddington," the negotiator said calmly.

"Hmm."

There was a pause, some shuffling, and Jacob motioned to Aram. "There have to be some sort of video feeds we can get into."

"They're wired to the bunker," Aram answered. "I've been trying to get ahold of them, but without being inside the panic room itself, I may not be able to."

"Keep working on it."

A sharp cry could be heard over the audio feed that was coming through Garrick's radio. "You can't see me, but Reddington can," Garrick said, "and he can see that I have dear Martha here. Say hello, Martha."

A woman could be heard on the other end of the line, terrified and crying. Jacob glanced over to Meera. "Red and Ressler are locked behind a steel door that Garrick is having trouble getting through. We're not putting them at any risk if we-"

"Take the house? As far as we can tell he has between thirty and forty men in there, not to mention the firepower. We didn't come ready for that, Phelps. We'll have to wait for reinforcements."

"They won't be here soon enough," Jacob snapped. "Ressler's hurt in there and-"

"I'm worried about him too, but we can't throw away our people's lives to blindly storm the facility."

"My demands are simple," Garrick said from the other end. "The FBI will pull back and Reddington will open that door." There was a pause, as if he were waiting. "Do you hear me, Red?"

"The door won't open, Anslo. There's a safety on it that I can't override," Reddington's voice came over the channel and Jacob's gaze darted to the screen.

"He's bluffing."

"There's nothing about that in the schematics," Aram agreed.

"When did you get those?"

"Officer Miller got these over to us when you were talking with Agent Mallick. You wanted to see the water damage?"

"Yeah." Jacob reached forward, looking over the specs. Several places were marked as having already been repaired, but there was still damage done to the underside of the house, weakening what looked like the floorboards of the basement where the panic room was located. If they weren't careful, Garrick was going to figure it out and bust in there through the flooring.

A shot rang through the audio feed and caused everyone to jump. "Okay then. There goes Martha. Sorry you didn't get to say goodbye," Garrick singsonged, apparently very proud of himself for killing the woman.

"And now you have nothing, Anslo. Well done. Very predictable."

"I wouldn't say that, Red. You've called in the cavalry, and they've provided me with plenty of targets."

Another shot rang out, but this one dropped an FBI agent standing next to a vehicle. There was no warning to it, not really, and Jacob felt his temper rise. "Pull those people back _now_ ," he growled out. They were sitting ducks where they stood.

"How many people are you willing to lose, Red? They don't have the numbers to take the house, but they seem determined to stick around. Maybe you should come out willingly and I'll stop killing your pets."

Jacob gripped the schematics in his hand. "Get me a direct line with Red," he instructed Aram and the other man nodded, pulling up a different channel and signalled to him that he could be heard. "Reddington, how's Ressler?"

"More out than in, I'm afraid," Reddington answered, his voice strained. "Tell me you have a plan in the works, Agent Phelps."

"Working on it, Reddington," he answered tightly. "Keep him alive." He shut down the communication. "How far out is backup?"

"They're scrounging people together," Meera said, irritation lining her voice. "They're telling me another ten minutes."

"Ressler doesn't _have_ ten more minutes and then whatever it takes us to overwhelm them," Jacob snapped.

"Agent Phelps, I suggest you take a walk and clear your head," Meera said carefully. "You're not doing him any good if you're not thinking clearly."

He snorted, running a hand through his hair. She was right. Of course she was right. The bunker wasn't the only section of the house that was fortified, and the fact that security measures had it clamped down like it was actually made it more difficult for them to get in. Sending their agents in now would just get them picked off. Garrick had already proved his sniper could take them before they got to the doorstep.

Jacob loosed a long breath and nodded, turning without another word and stalking off. He needed to find a way _around_ what was happening. That was what he excelled at. That had been what had made him so damn good in the field when he'd worked with Ressler chasing down Reddington to begin with. The older man had hated it half the time, saying that it edged too close to breaking his precious rules, but it had gotten the job done, and that had always been Jacob's purpose on their team. He'd been willing to do what others weren't. He'd been willing to take the risks, both physically and in his career, that moved them steps closer than they might have been otherwise. Had he lost that edge while on desk duty for so long? No, of course not. He had proven himself again and again since he'd been back. He just had to clear his mind, like Meera had said. He just had to focus and push aside the things that were clouding his judgement and figure out exactly what was important to him. He had to put aside all the things he lost, all the things that now stood on unsteady ground since Reddington's return. He couldn't change those things now. All he could do was help Ressler. _That_ was what he needed to focus on.

Jacob's feet carried him around the back of the house, the rain picking up again as he moved. There was one place where their men hadn't quite covered yet and couldn't until they received the reinforcements. He hadn't given himself permission to go that way, not really, but by the time he was there he was certain that it was the only way. He was just buying them time. One explosion gone wrong could bring the house down on top of Ressler. If he could stop that he would.

He raised his hands instantly as he was spotted by Garrick's men and two of them approached him, hands searching for weapons as they disarmed him. "Tell your boss that Jacob Phelps wants to talk to him in person."

"You're a fed," one of the men growled.

Jacob didn't pause, didn't even flinch, as he moved. The palm of his hand connected hard with the man's nose and he laid him out flat, the bone broken upward. He turned a darkened gaze to the dead man's counterpart. "Tell Anslo Garrick that Jacob Phelps wants to talk to him. He knows who I am."

The man nodded and motioned for Jacob to follow him inside. A couple of guards at the entrance watched him warily as he passed through and he kept his jaw set firmly. They wound further inside than he ever expected to go, but he watched carefully to stay out of the way of the cameras. Garrick might not mind parading in front of them, but they would damn Jacob if he was spotted in there without having told _someone_ he was going in with some sort of an excuse as to why. He might technically be lead agent on this situation, but right now he was going rogue and even the lies he was telling himself were starting to wear thin the further he moved inward. Everyone was not getting out of this.

"Agent Phelps, to what do I owe this visit?" Garrick chuckled, rounding the corner. His one good eye was focused on him in a spooky sort of way.

"The agent that Reddington has with him is Donald Ressler. You're going to let Ressler walk."

"Of course it is. Isn't that sweet, boys?" he chuckled, glancing back at his people who obliged with their own low laughter on cue. "Agent Phelps here came for his partner." He turned his spooky gaze back on Jacob, all laughter gone from his voice as he growled, "Idiot got himself mixed up with Red. Why the hell should I let him walk?"

Jacob's exit was closed off and he was surrounded. He was either going to give him what he wanted - the _only_ thing Garrick would bargain for when in exchange for Ress' life - or he was going to die. Part of him knew that he had made a choice to come here, while another part felt like he'd done it on instinct, but that could hardly be true. He was here to save someone other than himself. If Jacob were honest - and he rarely was, when it came down to it - he wasn't very good at caring about others, much less putting himself on the line for them in this way. He supposed that made his partner special. "Because I can hand you Reddington."

* * *

TBC

Notes: So, I've been looking forward the the events in this scene for some time now. One of the challenges of an AU like this one if figuring out what the changes in the person's past would affect when it comes to their personalities. Jacob is a means-to-the-end sort of guy. I think, in this universe, he buries that under a job that is much more socially acceptable than the one he has in canon, but he still uses that to justify what he does. He's willing to bend and often break rules to get the job done, but this is a whole different level. I'm very excited about the turn about that the events in this chapter will bring in chapters to come, with Jacob, and eventually with both Ressler and Reddington.

Next time - Jacob and the FBI storm the building and hope it's not too late.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fourteen**

"I have to wonder how you two became so close."

Reddington's voice pulled him out of his doze, and Ressler blinked hard against the darkness that threatened to drag him back under. "Who?"

"You and Agent Phelps." Reddington leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs at the knee. "You are a stickler for the rules, never off your straight and narrow. It's admirable, in its own way. You are, in every fiber of your being, a cop. At least I always could predict your next move, but then there was Phelps… He's very much your opposite, isn't he? How do you handle it?"

"Jake does a lot of things I wouldn't, but in the end, I trust him to do the right thing."

He could almost feel Reddington tilt his head as he studied him. "He's hardly one to follow a conscious. Why?"

"Because I trust him."

"Phelps is a liar."

Ressler snorted, a cough shaking him painfully as he did. "Sometimes, but he's honest when it counts. He's a better man than he gives himself credit for and…. And he can't be bought."

"He most certainly cannot," Reddington chuckled and Ressler wondered if the older man had ever tried. "Who do you know that was bought off, Agent Ressler?"

"No one."

"Now you're the one that's lying."

The agent sighed, feeling a little like he was floating. "Guess Jake and I rubbed off on each other a little over the years."

"You need to keep your eyes open. Look at me."

"Tired," Ressler managed. Everything felt so damn heavy. His eyes wouldn't stay open and he wasn't entirely sure he could actually feel his limbs or if he just knew that they should be there. His eyes fluttered a little and he looked up, finding Reddington bent over him and checking his pulse. "What do you want from him?"

"That's not something I can tell you, Donald, even if you wouldn't remember it anyway."

"You mean even if we're not going to make it out of this."

A short laugh escaped the other man. "If there's one thing that you should have learned about me by now it's that I'll be around long after those that wish me dead have passed."

Ressler wondered if he might be one of those. The thought was interrupted, though, by the sound of what might have been a saw. Reddington straightened abruptly, eyes turned to the opposite side of the room. Ressler struggled to sit up. "What the hell is that?"

"Water damage," Reddington growled, almost as if the words were a new form of curse. "He's found a weak point."

"Give me a gun. They want a fight, we'll give them a fight," Ressler said, willing himself to shift upward and got as far as his elbows before he fell back down.

"We won't survive it. It's time to take a different path."

The sound grew shriller and then suddenly there was a massive _thud_ that shook the whole basement. Shouts filled the room and Reddington raised his hands in surrender, that obnoxious smile of his plastered across his face. "Anslo, what are you doing here?"

One of Garrick's men moved over, gun raised, and Ressler was certain he was about to find himself looking down the barrel. "Leave him," Garrick snapped. "We've only got a short window."

Ressler struggled to sit up, to do something. He couldn't just let them take off with Reddington. It was his job to protect the man, no matter how much he hated him.

"Donald, that's enough," Reddington said, his voice strangely soft. "You've done enough."

Ressler got only a little further than the time before when his arms gave way beneath him and he slipped into darkness.

* * *

"Something's happened. Where the hell have you been?" Meera snapped as Jacob rounded the corner.

"Like you said, I needed to clear my head. What's going on?"

"They found a weak spot. We're going in. I didn't think you'd have a problem with that."

"About time," Jacob growled, pulling his gun from its holster. If he got lucky, they'd catch Garrick on his way out. If not… well he hoped that Ressler was still alive when they got to him.

The FBI stormed the house, finding it already empty. Jacob went with the team that moved into the crawl space beneath, finding the hole in the floor. He barely waited for the agent going before him to shout clear before he'd pulled himself up and into the room, ignoring the others that moved immediately to the doors to get them open. He went directly to Ressler who was laid out on a cot. He was too pale and too still, blood dried on the floor beneath him and against his leg. Jacob couldn't tell how bad it was, but it looked like Reddington had patched him back together as best as he could. It must have been a shotgun to have done that kind of damage.

"Soon as we get the doors open we can have a medical team in here," one of the agents said and Jacob nodded absently, crouching down at his friend's side. Ressler still hadn't even twitched.

"Ress? Hey, buddy, wake up." Beads of sweat stood on his forehead, but his skin was cool and clammy. A small twinge of panic threatened to set in and Jacob shook him very slightly. "Ressler, c'mon. You don't get to give up after all of this, do you hear me? You wouldn't let me, and I sure as hell won't let you. Open your eyes, dammit."

Slowly, very sluggishly, blue eyes slid open and it took even longer for them to focus on him. "Jake?"

"Hey," Jacob greeted, his smile small but real. "We're going to get you out of here, okay? Just hold on."

"Reddington. They took him."

"That doesn't matter right now."

"No, Jake, they took him. Garrick took Reddington. We have to-"

"You don't have to do anything other than stay awake until the medics get here, do you hear me? We'll handle Reddington."

Ressler let out a pained, muffled sound and Jacob looked over to the man struggling to find the right code to open the door. "Where the hell is Aram? He'll get the thing open. Just get him in here."

A hand reached clumsily for his arm, catching hold of his jacket. "Not their fault," Ressler manage, his voice quiet and strained. "You need to go after Reddington."

"We will. Right now I need to be right here." He found Ressler's blurry gaze studying him, as if trying to piece together why Jacob, of all people, wasn't rushing headlong after the job. He should have been, and if the situation had panned out any differently, he would have, but maybe Reddington was right about the things he did for the few people that made it passed all the walls. Kelly, Bruce, Liz, and Ressler. That was it. The list was short, and he'd be damned if it got any shorter. "You've been there for me through every close call. You think I'm going to leave you alone?"

Ressler chuckled breathlessly. "Careful, Jake. Someone'll think you care."

"You're my best friend," the younger man admitted softly.

"I'm your only friend."

"Thanks for the reminder," Jacob snorted. The doors slid open and almost immediately a medical team flooded in. Ressler's fingers loosed their grip on his sleeve and his hand dropped as his eyes rolled back. Jacob stepped back, eyes lingering on his partner.

"Looks like he's in bad shape," Meera said, suddenly at his side.

"Yeah, Garrick did a number on him."

"I filled Cooper in over the phone, but I'm about to head in to give him the details and see where we go from here. The higher-ups may want to contain this."

"You mean not go after him?" Jacob asked, a little surprised by the idea. He'd thought that their next assignment would be saving Reddington.

Meera shrugged. "It depends on how much exposure they think it'll cause us. I'll let you know."

He blinked at her. "Am I not invited to the conversation?"

"I thought you'd be going with Ressler to the hospital."

She was giving him a look that said she wasn't to be argued with and he offered a nod. "Thanks."

"He did the same for you. I'd assume you'd like to return the favour."

"Yeah." He watched them move his unconscious friend onto a gurnee to take him out to the waiting ambulance. He'd made the right call, he told himself. If they'd waited any longer it could have been too late, and Reddington had taken enough from him far too recently. He wasn't going to lose anyone else to him.

* * *

Liz had known something was wrong as soon as she had heard his voice, but she would never admit to feeling relief when she had found out it was Ressler and not Jacob lying in the hospital bed that day. She ducked out of her afternoon classes and rushed to the ER all the same, finding her husband slouched down in a chair, phone pressed to his ear, and he didn't look happy with whatever news he was receiving on the other end. His gaze shifted over as she walked in and he offered her a thin and very forced smile. "Keep me up to date, Meera. Liz just got here," he told the person on the other end of the line and ended the call, looking up. He reached a hand out to her, looking exhausted but whole. "Hey babe."

Relief flooded through her as she took it. He'd been distant since they had canceled the adoption, locking himself away with his own thoughts and unwilling or unable to communicate to her what he was feeling on it. He had called her for support, though. That meant things were at least inching back to something like normal. "Hey. How's Don?"

"Still in surgery."

"What happened?"

Her husband sighed heavily, his expression telling her just how many layers of classified the whole situation was wrapped in which could only mean Reddington. She squeezed Jacob's hand and took the seat next to him, a little surprised when he leaned into her. Carefully she released his hand so that she could wrap her arm around his middle and he leaned over, his head resting against her shoulder. "I'm so tired of him hurting the people I care about, Liz."

She tightened her grip on him, pulling him closer. "Did he… Did he turn on you guys?"

"No. Ress was in the wrong place at the wrong time. It's just…"

"Everything," Liz said softly and cringed. She knew that on one hand he loved the thrill of it. Jacob had always needed a place to focus his energy, and it had been a hard transition for him out of the field, but being forced to work with someone like Reddington had left him wrapped up in the mystery of why. It was consuming him and she wondered what kind of person forced the man she loved through that. What kind of person chose to put him in danger rather than leaving and giving him a chance at being safe? She didn't think she knew how to love very well.

"Yeah. A lot's happened."

It was an understatement, but still an honest one. He had promised her fairly early on - she thought it was likely when he knew things were going someplace serious for him- to be honest with her. She had learned pretty quickly that it wasn't a promise he readily gave. Jacob was careful with the truth, his earlier years teaching him to keep real information close and protected. He wore masks for the world to see, but the number of people that he let in behind his walls of his were very few in number. She had made it onto that short list along with the man that was in surgery behind a set of doors that seemed to lock every bit of useful information Jacob wanted behind them. It wasn't often that he wore his emotions on his sleeve, but right then, he looked too tired to care.

Liz shifted so that she could wrap both arms around him. "I'm sorry," she tried, knowing it wasn't nearly enough.

"Not your fault," he sighed and she tightened her grip.

"Partly."

"It's Reddington," her husband growled, the name leaving his lips like a curse. "Everything started falling apart when he came back into it. He…" Jacob tensed in her arms and pulled back so she could see the conflicted look in his eyes. When he spoke, his voice was so quiet even she had trouble hearing him. "I hate him, but I'm not sure I'm any better than him."

Liz reached up, her fingers lingering against his cheek. "Why would you say that?" He shrugged, suddenly unable to meet her eyes. "Babe, talk to me?" she begged softly, leaning in so that their foreheads were nearly touching.

They sat in silence for a long moment, leaned into each other, and she could almost feel the indecision raging through him, but she wasn't entirely sure if it was the classified status of everything he was in the middle of these days or his own uncertainty in his actions.

"I sacrificed Reddington to save Ress," he whispered at last. When Liz didn't say anything immediately he pulled in a deep breath and forced himself to meet her gaze.

She moved to take his hand at his torn expression, pushing aside her immediate reaction to calculate how this would affect her assignment. "Babe, you're… You're good at what you do. I'm sure you made the best call you could at the time."

"I thought so, but now I'm not sure. Ress would have-"

"Would Don be alive if you hadn't done whatever you did?"

Jacob blinked at her. "I don't think so," he admitted softly.

"Then you gave up the life of a man that has done nothing but hurt you for your best friend."

Her husband sighed. "Reddington may not even be dead. We're looking for him."

Well that was good news, as much as she might have personally hated the man. Reddington was the bane of her existence, but he was still the reason she was able to live this life with the man she loved. "See? Best of both worlds. You didn't cost anyone their life and you saved Don. I'd say that's pretty good."

"Yeah, in a twisted sort of way," he chuckled mirthlessly and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Thank you."

"For what?" she asked, leaning into him.

"Somehow making me feel like I'm not totally over the edge here."

Liz felt a pang of guilt settle deeply. Her husband saw her as a good person, someone to reassure him and give him guidance when he wasn't certain of his own methods. If he knew who she really was, he might not take that advice in quite the same way. "I love you," she said instead.

She could almost feel his smile, strained but real, as his fingers worked their way through her dark hair, causing her eyes to slip closed as she leaned against him. "I love you too."

"You're a better person than you give yourself credit for, babe. Don't ever let what you have to do make you believe otherwise."

"I don't deserve you, you know."

"I don't know, I think we make a pretty good team."

He straightened and Liz reluctantly opened her eyes, spotting the doctor that had caught her husband's attention. She sat up to let him stand, watching him move to speak with the dark haired doctor. If it turned out that Reddington had been killed she would need to make a few quick decisions. Berlin would likely recall her, the job finished. She would be paid and Bud would reassign her. She would leave, dropping the alias if Elizabeth Phelps like she hadn't just put four years into this. It would have been her longest running assignment to date, but she would be expected to shake it off like all the others, and if she couldn't… Would Bud let her go? If she told him the truth would he let her walk?

Blue eyes watched as the man she'd fallen in love with spoke with the doctor. No, Bud wouldn't let her go, and she knew it. Even if he told her she could leave, something would happen to Jacob. It would be like putting a bullseye on him. Liz simply brought in too much money for Bud to let her walk. If she wanted to stay with her husband when this was over she would have to come clean and hope beyond hope that he loved her enough to trust her. They would have to run.

The problem was that she wasn't sure she could ask him to do that. Jacob had struggled for so long thinking that no one could love him, but Kelly and Bruce had managed to start pulling him out of that mindset. He might love her, but the idea of asking him to give up the other people he cared about - so few in number and so hard-fought to get to that point for him - left a sort of hollowness in her chest.

"Liz?"

Liz turned, startled out of her thoughts, and blinked in surprise at the young woman that had called her name. Audrey Bidwell stood looking more than a little uncomfortable. She tried for a smile. "I thought that was you. How've you been?"

"Good. Mostly," Liz said as she stood. They hadn't heard anything out of Ressler's ex-fiancé since she had called it off. Liz had only met her a few times before she had left - just before Ressler had been reassigned as the lead agent to the Reddington case and given an office in DC. Ironically enough, if Audrey had held on just a little while longer their relationship might have been saved. "How have you-?"

"Hey, Audrey," Jacob called from behind and moved to stand beside Liz. "Ress just got out of surgery. Guess you got a call?"

"I'm still on as Don's medical contact, apparently. What happened?"

Liz's husband grimaced a little. "Took a shotgun spray to the leg. The doctor just said that they were able to save it. He's going to be out of the office for a while, but they got to him in time. Just barely." Liz could hear the undertone of relief in his voice and he reached down, his fingers curling around hers.

Audrey loosed a breath. "They wouldn't give me any details over the phone. All they said is that he'd been shot while on duty. I was worried… Is he awake?"

"Should be soon," Jacob answered. "He'll be happy to see you. Just don't hold him to his drug induced confessions, huh?"

Audrey gave a small smile. "Good to see you're back with him. I'd heard you weren't coming back after the wedding and everything. Congratulations, by the way. A little delayed."

"Three years in November," Jacob answered with a grin, and Liz resisted the urge to remind him that they weren't _that_ far into the year as it stood. There were worse things he could be excitable about, and it was nice to see his smile with everything that was happening, even if it were mostly put on for Audrey's sake.

"I'm glad it worked out. I remember how surprised Don was that…." She stopped, as if she realized exactly what was saying. "Well, he always said you were very focused on work."

"Is that how he put it?" Jacob chuckled. "Listen, you should probably go on back there. He's out and they said he should be awake soon."

"Don't you want-?"

"Given the choice, I guarantee Ressler would choose you. We'll be back in a few minutes."

Audrey looked down a little. "Thanks, Jake," she said as she moved passed him, peeling her gloves off as she went.

Liz caught sight of the glint and looked to Jacob, his expression darkening immediately. "That's not the ring Don gave her, is it?" she asked, knowing the answer just by his expression.

"No, it's not."

* * *

TBC

Notes: Well this has been a busy weekend, but I thought I'd get this chapter edited down and posted today. Since I likely won't have a great deal of time to write, posting the next chapter seemed like the next best thing :)

As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts. The reviews I get on these chapters really do bright up my day. I appreciate every last one.

Next time - Ressler finally makes it to dinner at the Phelps household while Reddington searches for the leaks that nearly cost him his life.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Fifteen**

"So she's really engaged?" Jacob called over his shoulder as he tossed the vegetables in the frying pan.

"To a hedge fund broker," Ressler grumbled from his place at the dining table, injured leg propped up on a chair and cane leaned next to him.

"You nicknamed him yet?"

His partner snorted. "Tassels."

Jacob nearly dropped the skillet as he burst out laughing. "Tassels?"

"Like on shoes," Ressler explained. "You know those-"

"I know what tassels are, Ress," the younger man grumbled. "Never owned a pair myself, but…"

"One of the reasons why we're friends."

"You seriously should consider upping your requirements, man."

"I said _one_ of the reasons," Ressler defended and Jacob could almost hear him roll his eyes. "You guys find Red yet?"

Jacob pulled in a deep breath as he reached over to stir the beans that were cooking on the other stove top. "We're still looking. We followed the trail to a decommissioned blacksite and found Garrick's body a couple of days ago."

"No Red though?"

"Not yet. Looked like they may have tortured ran DNA and confirmed it was his blood there, but no sign of him."

"And he hasn't called?"

"Or shown up at my house," Jacob confirmed with a short chuckle that covered his discomfort at the idea. He'd done what he had to to save his friend, but if Reddington ever caught wind of it there was a good chance the man would try to kill him again.

Ressler shifted in his seat. "When did things get so weird?"

"Hell if I know."

The front door opened, causing a snoozing Hudson to leap up from his place and bark happily. Jacob heard Liz's laugh echoing through their home and it pulled his lips into a smile even before she rounded the corner. "Something smells good. Hey, Don."

"Your husband kidnapped me."

"I can see that." She moved over as Jacob dumped the chicken and vegetables into a large bowl and pressed a kiss to his scruffy cheek. "Whatcha making?"

"Fajitas. You mind grabbing the guacamole out of the fridge?"

"You went all out."

"A lead ran dry this afternoon and we decided to get a fresh perspective on it first thing tomorrow morning."

"You get that _classified_ means you shouldn't be telling your wife either, right?" Ressler snarked from his place.

"So I got off early and kidnapped that idiot for dinner. I didn't think you'd mind."

"Not at all," Liz answered cheerfully and turned her gaze on her husband's best friend, opening the fridge to grab the guacamole out. "So, heard from Audrey?"

Jacob snorted a laugh and Ressler groaned loudly. "Thanks for the support, pal. And yes, Liz. I finally asked her about the ring. The guy works for some big hedge fund."

"I'm still getting a kick out of the nickname."

It was Ressler's turn to smirk. "Yeah, well."

"Are you still on pain meds?" Liz asked, pulling three beers out of the fridge and pausing there for a moment. She set one back in at the nod and scooted behind Jacob to the table. "This is nice. We haven't done this in a while."

"What, had me crash dinner?" Ressler asked.

"Had Jacob kidnap you to crash dinner," Liz corrected and her husband couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. She was right. It was nice, and increasingly rare lately. Even when Ressler had been stationed full time back in DC they had seen him in spurts. He was still the lead agent on the hunt for Reddington, and when Audrey had left he had nothing left but the job. Jacob knew how that felt, but he didn't want to even contemplate what it'd be after losing someone to it. He had Liz, and even through the trials, he didn't think he would ever be able to let her go. Losing her would be… unthinkable.

* * *

Dinner, as always in the Phelps house, was amazing. Ressler hadn't believed Jacob when they'd been overseas together and the younger man had claimed to be able to cook. He'd been fool enough to prove himself and had gotten stuck on cooking duty any night they could convince him to after that. He hadn't seemed to mind it too much then, and he hardly minded it now, which worked out, because from what Jake said Liz's skillset was as far from the kitchen as it could have possibly been.

"So are you starting to go stir crazy yet?" his partner asked as he stood, helping Liz with the dishes.

"I would say you have no idea, but-"

"I do. Way too much of an idea. Netflix is your best friend after a while."

Ressler snorted as his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out to find _unknown_ shown instead of a number and frowned. "Ressler," he answered.

" _Donald, I do hope you're feeling better,_ " Reddington's voice came through the phone and Ressler's eyes darted over to Jacob. His partner caught the unspoken request and mumbled something softly to Liz that had them both leaving Ressler with some space for the call.

"Red, the team's been looking for you. Are you alright?"

" _I managed to slip my captor. No help from your team of course._ "

"Jake's doing everything he can to help you, Red. Give me a meeting point and I'll coordinate-"

" _No, I don't think that would be wise. I will be away for a bit. Someone tipped Garrick off and I'll need to find who that was. Tell Cooper not to be too hasty dismantling our little team, though. Once my house is clean I'll be back to continue what we started._ "

"He's not going to just wait for you, Reddington. Jake's in charge of finding you. He-"

" _Your partner may not be as eager to find me as you'd think, Donald._ "

"What's that supposed to mean?"

" _If I don't come back in, he gets to return to his quieter life, doesn't he?_ "

The line went dead in his ear and Ressler found himself staring ahead, phone still pressed to his ear as the meaning of the words swirled in his mind. It was absurd to think that Jacob would do anything less than his best, just to go back to a desk job. Sure, things had been rough on him lately, but he adapted. He always did.

"You okay, Ress?"

Jacob's voice startled him out of his thoughts and slowly he set the phone down. "Yeah, I'm good."

"Who was it?"

Blue eyes watched the younger man for a moment. "Reddington," he said at last, watching him carefully.

Jacob's expression turned curious. "Seriously? Did he set a meet? We can bring him in now if-"

"He won't. He seems to think that there's a mole or something."

"At the Post Office?"

"Not sure. He thinks someone tipped Garrick off."

"That makes sense. The man moves around more than most. If the leak came from inside the Post Office, it'll be someone with access to his chip location."

"You said they pulled that, right?"

"Yeah. Meera said they chased them down until they found it in a baggy on the street."

Ressler loosed a long breath. "Jake, you-"

"We'll get him, Ress. We have to. The people above Cooper's head will shut us down if we don't."

"Guess you'd get to go back to desk duty. You and Liz could pick the adoption back up."

He watched his friend cringe painfully. That was still a sore subject, and likely would be for a while. Ressler knew Jacob blamed Reddington for Liz's decision, but would he have gone that far that he'd risk all the good they could do?

Jacob glanced behind him, as if looking for Liz. "I can't now. She and I both know that. We need to finish this and I need to know why me. I can't do that without Reddington on board."

Ressler nearly sighed in relief. That he could believe. It had been stupid to question Jacob on that. He should have known better. Reddington might have known pieces of information, but Ressler knew _Jacob_. He was one of the few that did. "Right. Any leads on that?"

His partner gave him an innocent look. "What do you-"

"Oh come on, Jake. I know you've been looking into it in the side. Any leads?"

"Just a name that seems to be linked to all the cases. Masha Rostova. I've run her through our databases, but nothing is turning up."

"Could be an alias."

"Maybe, but I think it may be a real name and the aliases are how she's kept it clean, you know?"

"That what you would have done?"

Jacob smirked. "Yeah, in my alternate life as a criminal," he chuckled.

"It's alright. I would have caught you."

"Are you serious? You wouldn't have had a chance. I would have run circles around you and you wouldn't have even known it."

Ressler choked on a laugh. "Keep telling yourself that, pal."

"Why am I the criminal in this scenario, anyway? Maybe you would be."

"Not a chance," Liz said as she walked through and to the fridge. "Don would make a terrible criminal, babe."

"Only because Ress would be too busy trying to balance his rule book to get any actual criminal activity done," Jacob grumbled.

Ressler rolled his eyes and eased himself out of his chair, grabbing for his cane. "You say that like it's going to offend me that if make a horrible criminal. I like it on this side of the law, thanks."

"Are you leaving, Don?"

"Yeah, I have plans to grab coffee with Audrey."

"Does her fiancé know?" Jacob teased.

"I think she wants my blessing or something on it."

His partner's smirk faded. "What are you going to tell her?"

Ressler sighed. That had been the question he'd been trying to answer since the plans had been made. "I should give it to her," he murmured, "but I'm not sure I can."

"Good luck, buddy. I don't envy you your position."

"You need a ride?" Liz offered.

"No, I'll catch a cab. Thanks for dinner, guys." This was something he needed to face on his own.

* * *

He looked tired, but that was beginning to be the new normal. If he wasn't out from injuries then he was running nonstop. She really hadn't expected to see him in until late that night, and while she was glad to see that his actions with the Ressler and Reddington situation hadn't caused him to withdraw from his friend, she was even happier to have him to herself.

Liz moved around the back of the couch he was sitting on and her hands went to his shoulders, working at the knots there through his sweater. He made a soft sound as he leaned into it. "You're amazing, you know that?"

"So you keep telling me."

They had spent the rest of his medical leave wrapping up the adoption issue, carefully avoiding actually _talking_ about it unless they had to. Jacob had a bad habit of shutting down when he felt threatened emotionally. Kelly had told her once that he was much better than he'd been years ago when they had first adopted him, but Liz had seen how long it had taken him to open up to her about some things. It wasn't a small worry that this was going to set them back.

There had been days since she had told him that she needed to back out of it that he hardly seemed ready to look at her, much less anything else. She had thought maybe they were moving past it when they'd sat together at the hospital, waiting for his friend to come out of surgery. He'd confided in her, leaned on her, and things had felt so normal for a short stretch of time, but then they'd gotten home and he had be sure that Ressler would be okay, and he'd retreated again. He'd been swinging back and forth so badly that she could hardly keep up.

"I'm sorry," her husband said softly, pulling her out of her thoughts.

"For what?"

"For being distant lately."

Liz wrapped her arms around him from behind, bending over so she could fit her chin against the crook of his neck. "When did you develop the ability to read minds?"

He chuckled. "I know you. I always know what you're thinking."

That was a terrifying thought. She smiled instead, pressing a kiss to his cheek and standing to round the couch and take a seat next to him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jacob sighed and reached out, taking her hand. He pulled it up to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "Not really. I can't… I just don't think I'm ready to. Not without saying something that I know I'll regret. I mean, I get your reasons, I do, but-"

"But they still hurt."

He nodded. "I don't want to push you away anymore though. I know I have been."

"I've felt a little like a yo-yo lately," she murmured and he cringed. She shifted, their fingers still laced together, and she leaned in to kiss him. He returned it, his free hand coming to the side of her face slowly, working its way back to her hair by the time she broke it off. "I'm not going anywhere," she promised for what felt like the hundredth time. She knew that was was part of it, and no matter how many time she said it, it would be a lingering doubt in his mind. Some habits were were nearly impossible to break.

"I know."

"I'm not sure you do."

He closed his eyes and sighed.

"Kelly and Bruce have to give a little on being the only people you trust not to leave you, babe."

Blue eyes snapped open and his expression was a little panicked. "It's not-"

"It is. As well as you know me, I know you. I swear to you, Jacob. I'm all in on this. I have been for a long time now."

She watched his expression soften, the walls he had secured himself behind the last couple of weeks finally cracking and, very suddenly, she found herself being pulled into his arms. He held her close and she returned the embrace, feeling him cling to her more desperately than he'd let himself since the night she had told him. It killed her a little inside. She had taken so much from him, and she refused to take any more. Reddington was alive and he'd be back. It bought her time, and with time she could figure out a way around this. Around hurting him anymore.

"Hey?" he asked softly. "You want to go upstairs?"

Liz felt a small smile perk her lips. "Yeah?" she asked.

Jacob leaned in, the kiss slow and Liz's eyes fluttered closed as she lost herself to it. When she felt him pull back, it took all of her self control to make her open her eyes again. Her husband wore a very serious expression. "I'm going to find out what the link is, Liz."

"What do you mean?"

"Why Reddington came back. Why he's forced himself into our lives. I've found a link. I don't know what it means yet, but I found it."

"Can you tell me what it is?" Liz asked carefully.

His lips thinned out and he leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "It's a name. Masha Rostova."

Liz froze, dread filling her as her real name left her husband's lips. "Who is she?" she ventured after a moment, careful to keep her voice steady.

"I don't know yet," he answered as he sat back, "but I'm going to find her before Red does. I have to know why he's using us to find her."

She saw the determination in his eyes that always seemed to yield results. Liz forced a smile and took his hand in hers, pulling it to her lips and pressing a kiss to his palm. "I guess she could be anyone, huh? I'm sure you'll find her."

"Then we can get our life back."

"Exactly," Liz whispered, tugging him to his feet. "You said something about going upstairs?"

Jacob grinned, joining her and letting her pull him up the stairs. He followed her, and something deep in her ached with the reality that they were living their lives on borrowed time now.

* * *

"The arrangements have all been taken care of. Luli has handled the transfer of the funds into Mr Phillips' family's accounts."

Raymond Reddington looked up, his expression somber. "Thank you, Kate," he said softly. "I appreciate your work on this."

The older woman nodded stiffly, a slight frown on her lips. "I also picked up the video from Mr Tallert's private feeds." She held the disk out and Red took it, slipping it into the player.

"The FBI does not have access to this?"

"No, they don't even know it exists," Kate Kaplan confirmed.

This was the last piece to wrap up this rather terrible puzzle. Red had taken no joy in ending the life of his friend and trusted right hand, but he wouldn't let his family suffer for it.

He had been the one to give the location away, but someone out of the FBI had still provided Garrick with the escape route. Blue eyes focused on the video from the hidden camera that should provide him with the answer he needed. Martin had reached out to him, eager to help in any way and prove his own innocence in the matter. The camera was angled towards the exit, the same one that they had exited through. The face that appeared, ready to give Garrick his escape, was not one he'd truly expected.

"That's the husband, isn't it?" Mr Kaplan asked, glaring at the figure on the screen.

"Yes, that is Agent Phelps," Reddington said softly, watching as the video feed shifted to down the hall, and Phelps was making a deal with Garrick. There was no question now. Elizabeth's husband had been the final one to betray him.

"This could be troublesome," Mr Kaplan mused.

Reddington sighed. He had just killed a man that had been loyal to him for years, but this was the man that Lizzie loved. Troublesome was an understatement.

* * *

TBC

Notes: Anyone want to wager a guess as to what Reddington's going to do about the situation?

Next time - Ressler and Jacob reminisce about Quanitco days and Liz makes an actual connection that she never would have expected.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Sixteen**

There were times when life seemed to give him a run of bad luck. He wouldn't have called it that, of course, but in the last six months he had been asked - forced - to work with a man that he didn't like, much less trust, had nearly lost his partner, and had nearly died himself. Then Audrey had come back in his life, and somehow it made every struggle worth it.

Ressler never would have predicted that Audrey would have dumped Tassels to give them another shot. He never would have predicted that they could have come back together so seamlessly, or that she would want to be as close as possible. She had always known his teammates and been on friendly enough terms with them - well, she'd always been just a little wary of Jacob, but that wasn't abnormal when someone got past his charming smile and spent time when he wasn't trying to appear as normal as possible - but Liz had come into the picture just before Audrey had left, so now she was determined that, if nothing else, she would have someone that understood what she was going through. That's how she had somehow talked them all into a weekend away. It was Ressler's last weekend before being taken off of medical leave and things were slow enough at the Post Office that Jacob could slip away. After everything that had gone wrong, he was hesitant to hope for a few things going right, but this weekend might just do it.

"Can I ask you something if you promise you won't tell your partner?"

Ressler set his bag down just inside the front door of the cabin that had belonged to his parents when they had been alive. "There are a lot of things that I don't tell Jake that you tell me," he answered, a small smile tugging at one corner of his lips and Audrey rolled her eyes, popping him lightly on the shoulder.

"I'm serious. I don't want to offend your friend."

"It's nearly impossible to offend him," Ressler chuckled. "But, seriously, I won't tell him."

Audrey smiled and Ressler had to stop a moment. He had known that he had missed her after she had left, but since she had come back, there were times when it hit him all at once just how much. He would do better this time. He could make this work. There weren't many people that got these second chances. He wouldn't waste his.

"Don?"

"Hmm?"

A laugh escaped her, amusement making it all the way to her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Lost in thought?"

"Yeah. You asked your question, didn't you?"

"And this is why I drove," she laughed and kissed the tip of his nose. "What were you thinking about?"

"You, and how lucky I am to have you here."

Her smile turned to a grin. "Really?"

"Really," he answered and leaned in. She met him readily in the kiss and it was almost like they hadn't lost the time they had. Out of all the rough patches, if nearly getting his leg blown off brought her back to him, he could live with that.

They broke and he cleared his throat. "Your question about Jake," he prompted softly.

"Right. Well, it's more like Jake and Liz. He's… Well him, and she seems really normal…. See it sounds so mean when I say it out loud."

Ressler pressed his lips together, trying not to laugh at her. Finally he managed to keep mostly a straight face as he spoke. "No, you're not the only one that's wondered," he chuckled. "Jake'll be the first one to admit that Liz is way out of his league."

"I've never heard the whole story. All I know is that when you guys had events stateside he never brought anyone."

"He didn't really date." Ressler shrugged. "That's just him. I think they met at some little coffee bistro in Paris. He was late to meet us at the hotel so I went to find him and found him so lost in the conversation he didn't even know what time it was."

Audrey smiled a little. "So those two hit it off from the first moment?"

"I guess so. She was in Paris for some sort of conference, but you know she teaches at Georgetown?"

Her smile only grew. "Well, they say everything happens for a reason."

Ressler blinked at her for a second before she started laughing, causing him to chuckle. "I guess I can't deny that anymore," he murmured and she kissed him.

They lingered there a moment, both unwilling to break it off, but when they finally did, Audrey spoke a little breathlessly. "This was a good idea, wasn't it? Maybe it should have just been us."

"I think it's a good idea," Ressler answered a little reluctantly. "You and Liz never really got a chance to know each other and you can get to know Jake."

"And it's not like you two would ever need some R&R."

He smiled, sitting heavily on the couch. "We just never get it."

"But you're permanently stationed here, so maybe a little more," Audrey answered as she sat next him him, leaning against his shoulder.

"We're going to make it work this time, sweetheart," he murmured, taking her hand in his and she curled her fingers around his. "You're first."

Audrey beamed at him, leaned up, and pressed a kiss to his cheek. No, he wouldn't let anything mess this up this time.

* * *

"I would never have pegged you for a cook," Audrey said from her place at the table, sipping on her wine.

"My mom is a chef. One of the ways she tried to keep me out of trouble as a teen was by teaching me. Turns out I'm not half bad at it," Jacob answered as he leaned against the cabinets, the food sizzling behind him. They had gotten to the cabin a little later than they expected, but that hadn't seemed to put Ressler and Audrey out too badly. As much as Jacob knew he and Liz needed a weekend away, those two were piecing their relationship back together. He'd been a little surprised when Ress had invited them, but his friend had gone on to explain that Audrey could use someone that understood, and Liz seemed like the best person for that. Jacob couldn't say he disagreed.

Liz snorted. "It's a good thing too. I'm useless in the kitchen."

"Not completely useless," Jacob argued. "You can make those brownies."

"From a box," Liz laughed.

"That still counts," Audrey argued. "If it's not on a grill, Don can't cook."

"That's not true. I can make spaghetti pretty well."

Jacob snorted. "Keep telling yourself that, Donnie. I've eaten your spaghetti."

Ressler rolled his eyes. "Sorry I didn't get adopted by the the chef."

"Kelly likes you. She'd teach you if you asked."

"I didn't know you were adopted, Jake," Audrey chimed in and Jacob offered a casual smile and a small nod of affirmation.

"Are you guys talking about kids yet? I've heard it both ways where some people that were adopted are set on having their own and some really want to adopt…" Audrey trailed off. "Did I say something wrong?"

Jacob swallowed hard. "We were going to."

"I've hit a sore spot right away, haven't I?" Audrey asked quietly.

"We just finished canceling it," Liz said quietly.

"I'm so sorry."

"It's fine. We're fine," Jacob's wife said firmly, as if she were trying to make sure that he didn't say anything about it. He never did, so her assumption that he would in front of Ressler's girlfriend hit a nerve.

"You know what I've been looking forward to?" Audrey asked, apparently sensing the tension that she had accidentally created. She turned toward Liz with a sly smile. "I've asked before, but Don always manages to get out of it. I'd like to hear some Quantico stories. _Those_ aren't classified, right boys?"

Jacob blinked hard. Well this could go very badly. Not as badly as discussion their failed adoption, of course, but he wasn't sure he liked the way that his wife's own expression echoed Audrey's. "That sounds like a great idea," Liz agreed. "I've never been able to get them to share either."

"Well there's two of us now. I'm not above ganging up on them."

Ressler shifted where he was sitting, gripping chair like he was going to try to make a run for it. Jacob wasn't sure he blamed him. Liz was grinning like the devil and leaned her elbows against the table. "Come on. There have to be some good ones. You two were roommates."

"Didn't you end up in a fistfight by the end of the first day?" Audrey asked curiously.

"It was the end of the first week," Ressler corrected, "and according to our records, that was a sparring match gone wrong. We could have been kicked out of the program for fighting."

Jacob snorted. "That's how you got your nickname," he chuckled, the story coming back to him. "Boy Scout here wanted to come clean about it, but I bailed him out."

"I never asked you too."

"And he _still_ hasn't thanked me for it."

"You got me shot in the hostage drill."

"You outed me when I was going to sneak off campus."

"We weren't allowed off campus."

"Hence the sneaking!"

"Jake can't swim. There's a story for you," Ressler snapped, his expression tightening as soon as the words had left his mouth as if he knew he shouldn't have.

"You always have to bring that up. You're the one that nearly drowned me that day."

"In my defence, how was I supposed to know you couldn't swim? We'd had drills in the pool."

"One. That I didn't attend."

"Yeah, because you were _sick_ ," Ressler grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Okay, back up, so what's the story?" Audrey prompted and the men turned towards the ladies that were both sitting at the table with eager expressions on their faces.

"I have to check on the food," Jacob mumbled and shuffled over to it.

"Jacob liked pushing every button he could find. Not that a lot has changed in that, but one afternoon we were back and forth and I just needed to shut him up or I was going to break his nose again." Audrey and Liz both snorted a laugh and Jacob shook his head. Ressler was smirking by this point. "So I shoved him in the pool."

"Yeah, I bet you thought it was really funny until I didn't come back up."

"Idiot sank to the bottom like a bag of rocks. I repeat: how was I supposed to know an FBI trainee couldn't swim?"

"Plenty of people can't swim."

"You say that, but you're still the only one I know," Liz laughed.

Audrey snorted. "So what happened?"

"I dove in after him. He'd swallowed half the pool, but he was fine."

Jacob started dishing the chili out that he'd been cooking and passed it around. "How about we talk about how you got pegged as a trainee as soon as we stepped foot into the undercover assignment?" he asked and offered Audrey a charming smile as he handed her a bowl. "I don't know if you've noticed, but your boyfriend basically has _cop_ written across his face."

"I kind of like him that way," Audrey answered with a smile.

"Jake was top in our class on the undercover assignment," Ressler grumbled, taking his own bowl. "Figured I'd tell them before you bragged."

"You're just jealous."

"You nearly failed out because you couldn't toe the line."

"You never told me that, babe," Liz said as her husband joined them at the table.

"Ress is exaggerating."

"Your record still has the formal warning written on it."

Jacob shoveled a spoonful of chilli in his mouth and shrugged.

"So you guys fought, nearly got each other killed-"

"Virtually did at least once," Jacob added in.

"- and kept each other from getting kicked out," Liz finished. "Why do I feel like nothing's really changed since Quantico?"

Both men chuckled. "Guess not," Ressler answered.

"We've gotten pretty good at watching each other's backs," Jacob agreed.

"Good, because you both have someone to come home to," Audrey said with a bright smile. "Not getting yourselves shot or…whatever else your close calls include."

"And now we know why we're really here, Ress," Jacob laughed. "To get lectured."

Liz rolled her eyes and swatted at him. "Maybe you both just have people that care about you. Ever think of that?"

He leaned over and pressed a kiss against her cheek. "Brings me home every time, doesn't it?"

His wife's expression softened and Jacob grinned at her.

"Okay, I see it now," Audrey said from her place.

"See what?"

"You two," she answered motioning between them.

"Audrey wasn't sure how it worked," Ressler chuckled.

"A lot of patience on Liz's part," Jacob assured her. "She puts up with a lot from me."

"You guys stretch our patience," Liz teased, her hand finding his under the table. "But it's worth it."

Jacob felt her fingers tighten around his and the unspoken reassurance there. It had been rough since Reddington came back into their lives, but they needed this. It was a chance to step back from it and regain some perspective on what really mattered. Liz mattered. More than anything, and he wouldn't let Reddington steal that away from him.

* * *

She had had her hesitations about the weekend, but they had _needed_ it. There was something relaxing about the fact that the cell service was in and out and that the most dangerous situation they found themselves in was the guys trying to get a campfire going outside.

"Please tell me we have a fire extinguisher if we need it."

Liz looked up from her seat where Audrey was joining her, bringing with her an extra beer as she joined Liz on the log where she was seated. "I saw one just inside the door."

"Oh good," Audrey answered lightly as she popped the top off her bottle and took a sip. "I'm really glad you two came out. It's nice to have someone that understands."

A small smile tilted her lips and Liz sipped in her drink. "It's… difficult to let him go every morning," she murmured softly, the words more honest than she expected. "I just want to hold on so nothing like Vienna ever happens again."

"I heard about that. Don and I had just… well it was just after we'd broken up. I should have reached out to you."

Liz shrugged. "We didn't know each other well."

"He was shot, wasn't he?"

"Three times. I don't know all the details about the shooter."

"Classified," Audrey groused and Liz nodded.

"Yeah. All I know is that it was one of Reddington's men. Don's the only reason Jacob is still alive. He kept him from bleeding out in the street until the ambulance got there." Liz closed her eyes, pulling in a steadying breath. This was getting too close to real, but somehow her own real was lining up far too closely with what her cover should be feeling. Those lines really did blur these days.

"I don't mean to bring up bad memories," Audrey murmured.

"No, it's fine. I just feel guilty sometimes, you know? When they called him back up to work on this task force with Don, they basically told him he could take the position or leave the bureau. Jacob loves the FBI. I told him to stay. If anything happens to him now, it's going to be my fault."

"You two made the decision together. You can't blame yourself for that."

Liz tried for a smile. "I feel like it's slowly killing us. He wanted this adoption so badly and I… I told him that I couldn't do it alone, if anything happened to him. We didn't make _that_ decision together. That one's on me." And Reddington, she thought bitterly.

"It helps to talk," Audrey said, her eyes focused on the guys that had finally gotten the fire going and were motioning them over. "Maybe this is good for all of us now."

Blue eyes looked up as the other woman stood, and Liz nodded slowly. It was nice to have someone to talk with. Here own secrets were something she was used to, she'd always lived with those, but sometimes it seemed like everything was snowballing on her. She hadn't thought talking could relieve some of the the pressure that had built inside from all of it, but as she followed Audrey over to them, she thought maybe it could. She couldn't tell the other woman everything, of course, but she could tell her some, and that could make all the difference.

She took a seat next to Jacob who had given up on pulling the marshmallow bag open by hand and was cutting through the bag with a pocket knife. Liz waited until he was done and leaned over, catching him in a kiss. She felt his hand come up to the side of her face, thumb against her cheek and she leaned into his touch.

"What'd I do to deserve that?" he asked when they broke, that impish smile of his playing on his lips. "I want to make sure to do it again."

"I love you," she answered simply. "That's all it takes."

His smile grew and he pressed another quick kiss against her lips. "I love you too."

"Well that's a relief." Liz sat back with him and laughed he handed her a marshmallow on the end of a pole for roasting. "Really? Are we twelve?"

"I've never done it," he answered with a shrug.

"Never?" she asked. Even she had roasted marshmallows once. It had been on assignment after her graduation from Bud's school. She had been one of his youngest recruits and the assignment was to get close to a diplomat. Thankfully the diplomat had a daughter that went to camp every summer.

"We didn't have a lot of camping trips in the foster system and when Kelly and Bruce adopted me we lived in the heart of New York City."

"Why do I feel like Quantico isn't the only place you have interesting stories from?" Audrey asked from next to Ressler, her marshmallow already fitted in the pole and over the fire.

"We could be here all night," Ressler chuckled. "And not because he's telling the stories, but because Audrey doesn't let up."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "I don't talk a lot about it."

Audrey nodded and settled back, receiving a startled look from her boyfriend. "Who are you and what have you done with Audrey?"

She smirked. "He doesn't want to talk about it."

Ressler's gaze shifted over to his friend. "How do you do that?"

"It's a gift," Jacob chuckled as he pulled his marshmallow out of the flames and frowned at the charred remains.

"And apparently roasting marshmallows is not," Liz laughed.

"It was in there for five seconds," he grumbled and she took it from him, getting rid of what remained.

She felt his eyes on her as she fished another one out and stuck it on the end, removing it when it was done and motioning to the waiting gram crackers and chocolate. She broke it in half and handed one half to him.

Jacob took a bite. "Okay, that's pretty good. I get it now."

"Oh good," Ressler huffed in feigned relief. "I don't know what we would have done if you didn't."

"Watch it. Pretty sure you're still limping too much to take off in a run."

"Behave or I won't make another one," Liz teased and watched her husband relent.

They talked into the night. Liz didn't even realize how late it was getting until she heard her name and blinked her eyes open to see the fire burning low. She sat up, finding herself leaning against Jacob, and he smiled at her. "You fell asleep. Ress and Audrey are heading in so I thought you might want to too."

Blue eyes blinked slowly, clearing the sleep from them. "You too?"

"Yeah."

"'Kay," she murmured and stood slowly. She felt an arm snake around her shoulders, holding her steady as she walked, and mumbled a goodnight as she followed Jacob half blindly into the cabin.

He tucked her into bed and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She caught him before he got too far away, though, and pulled him back down into a real kiss. She felt him lean into it, all of the emotions that he had such a hard time understanding at times focused on on her and pouring into that moment. She pulled him a little and he halfway tumbled into the bed, rolling so he wouldn't land on her. "I love you."

"You too."

"Always?" she asked, her voice smaller than she expected.

"Always," he promised her and Liz believed him. Against everything she'd ever been taught, she believed him.

* * *

TBC

Notes: Thank you to everyone who has been reviewing! You guys are awesome :D

Next time - Raymond Reddington makes a visit to Ressler's cabin to confront Jacob.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Seventeen**

Jacob woke with a start, the nightmare fading almost as soon as the room came mostly into focus, but the fear lingered, pulling shuddering breaths from him as he tried to gather himself where he sat, sheets twisted around him.

"Babe?" Liz murmured sleepily, reaching out and her fingers touching his bare arm. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he answered, managing to keep his voice mostly steady. "Just a nightmare. Go back to sleep."

She blinked her eyes open as he started to untangle himself. "Where're you going?"

"For a run," he answered honestly. "It's five thirty. I'm not getting back to sleep."

"You want me to come too?"

He smiled at the sleepy offer. "No. I need to clear my head." He leaned over and pressed a kiss to the side of her head. "Love you."

"You too."

Jacob pulled himself free of the sheets and rummaged through his bag. Ten minutes later he was dressed and fitting earbuds into place to blare his music as he slipped out the front door.

His pace matched the music as he took off down the front steps, winding around a path through the trees. It was nice being out like this. Usually his morning runs had him dodging traffic, but here the only thing he had to worry about was the occasional fallen tree in his path.

He lost track of how far he ran, focusing on the music and the terrain. One foot in front of the other, dodge that rock and that tree. It was simple. It was one of the few things that was anymore, and by the time he circled back around to the cabin the sun was starting to come up. That didn't mean signs of life were showing yet, but they were on vacation. He wouldn't expect everyone to be awake yet.

"Agent Phelps, so glad that you're still predictable in some ways."

Jacob stopped stiffly, a chill making its way up his spine as he turned, blue eyes focusing on the owner of the voice that had called out to him. Raymond Reddington stood smiling, arms crossed in front of him with one hand grasping the opposite wrist, sunglasses perched on his nose, and fedora pulled down low to fight the chill of the morning. Jacob hadn't heard from him directly since the Anslo Garrick incident, but only through Cooper for any assignments that came in. "What are you doing here, Red?" he asked, plucking his earbuds out and shifting his weight.

"I came to see you," the criminal answered cheerfully.

"I'm on vacation. Whatever it is can wait two days for me to get back to DC and to the office." He turned to start up the stairs to the porch, fully planning on leaving Reddington standing outside in the cool morning air.

"This doesn't have to do with work. Not directly, anyway. It does, however, have to do with the way you and I will approach our relationship from here on out."

"Is there something in you that just refuses to give a guy a straight answer?" Jacob growled irritably, turning on him and leveling one of his best glares. It was one that made grown men squirm in the interrogation room. Reddington didn't so much as flinch.

The smile remained and he took a step forward, unclasping his hands. "Very well. I've come across a very difficult situation, Agent Phelps. Perhaps you can help me with it."

Jacob shifted his weight again, tilting his head and trying to get a better read on the man. It was like staring at a mask that fully encompassed his being. "Go for it."

Reddington smile faded a bit. "I'm sure you know Newton Phillips. I believe you and your FBI friends had a name for him…"

"Mr Grey," Jacob offered up. "The man was _always_ in a grey suit."

"That's the one. You see, I've always had a very strict policy, and it's served me very well: those that betray me don't survive the experience."

"You found your mole," the young agent breathed, trying for to sound too relieved. Every once and awhile, things turned out the way he hoped.

"Newton and I have a long history, Agent Phelps. He has been in my employ for many years and he has always been worthy of my trust… until now."

"I'm not going to tell you to kill the man, Reddington. If you have something on him linking him to Garrick we can put a warrant out-'

"Newton has been dealt with," the older man said sharply. "This issue that I'm facing now has what to do with you."

"Me?" Jacob echoed, his expression even.

"Newton was a close and _dear_ friend, Agent Phelps. You are a means to an end."

Jacob saw the motion too late. That, and Red was _fast_. Faster than he would have ever anticipated him being. He had covered the two steps or so between them and had his hand around the back of his neck in a vice-like grip before the younger man had moved. Jacob stood there, frozen, and he felt the gun that he hadn't even seen him draw press against his ribs. "What the hell are you doing, Reddington?"

"I take loyalties very seriously."

"I don't know what-"

"Don't you dare lie to me," Reddington hissed, his voice wavering. "I killed a _friend_ , Phelps. I put a bag over his head and watched him twitch until he had suffocated to death in my grasp. A man that had worked with me for longer than you've served in the bureau. I saw your face on the camera. I know exactly what you did."

"You don't know _anything_ ," Jacob growled dangerously, dropping all pretenses. "What are you going to do, Reddington? Shoot me? Again? If you are then just get it over with. It's better than listening to you monologue about how terrible you feel that you just murdered your buddy."

He watched the older man's lips twitch downward, his eyes narrowing behind his sunglasses. "There will be a day, Agent Phelps, in which you are no longer useful to me. Until then, count your remaining days with your job and your wife-"

Something snapped and Jacob shoved outward hard, sending Reddington stumbling back, a little surprise flashing across his expression before falling right back behind his careful mask as Jacob fumed. "Stay the hell away from Liz. Stay away from _us_ , you son of a bitch. We've lost enough because of you!"

"Is that why then? You blame me for your failed adoption."

"If you'd stayed away we'd have been happy."

Reddington shook his head slowly and holstered the gun. "The very sad thing is, Agent Phelps, that you don't even know what it is that you don't know. When it hits you, it will take you down with it. I might have stopped it before, but now… Now you're on your own."

"What the hell are you going on about? Why are you here?" Jacob shouted, the frustration from the months of dealing with Reddington day in and day out finally boiling over. He was trembling, his control shattered and all he wanted to do was wrap his hands around the man's throat and choke the life out of him.

"I'm here because I need something," Reddington answered, his expression blank. "And if you want to or not, Agent Phelps, you will help me get it. Then we are done."

He turned, leaving Jacob standing just shy of the steps leading up to the cabin and feeling threatening to swallow him. He was scared, he realized after a moment. Not just scared, but terrified. He didn't know what the man wanted from him. He didn't know how to protect the people he cared about from him, and he didn't know how he'd just survived the experience. Worst of all, he felt like he was losing control of his own life. He couldn't fight back because that would bring what he'd done to light. He couldn't leave because that took away what small bit of protection the FBI afforded him with Reddington. He was trapped, and he could feel the walls closing in, and that most certainly terrified him.

* * *

"Don? Don someone's shouting outside."

He could hear her, he knew what she was saying, but Ressler was having a hard time opening his eyes to react to it. The bed was absurdly comfortable, and it wasn't until Audrey moved away from him that he let out a small sound of protest.

"I think something is wrong," she said firmly and then another voice, one he knew well, cut through Donald Ressler's drowsiness.

"We lost everything because of you!" Jacob's voice carried through the window and Ressler bolted upright. He looked out the window, but his partner was out of his line of sight. Audrey looked nervous and he offered her what he hoped was a reassuring smile as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, grabbing his cane to help steady himself on his injured leg, and pulled his sidearm from the drawer.

"Just stay here. I'm sure everything is fine."

"Should I call someone?"

"No. Let me see what's going on." His movements were a little stiff as he limped down the hall and out the front door, gun gripped in his hand and he found his partner standing at the bottom of the steps, looking like he was just barely holding himself together. On his way out was Raymond Reddington, who didn't even bother to turn around and acknowledge Ressler, who was piling down the stairs as quickly as he was able. "Jake? Jacob, what happened?"

His friend turned, his expression slightly haunted. Ressler made it to the bottom of the stairs without tumbling down them and reached out. "You okay?" He watched Jacob nod slowly. "What did Reddington want?"

Jacob blinked hard, like he was coming out of a fog. Ressler had seen the expression a handful of time since he'd met him nearly ten years before. It almost always preceded a sizable lie. "He found the mole. Mr Grey tipped off Garrick."

"Hell," Ressler breathed. "What else?"

"Well he killed him, apparently. That'll be fun to figure out what to do with."

"No, I mean, what was that look you had when I walked out?"

"What look?"

Ressler frowned a little, glancing towards the door. He waved at Audrey who was lingering, peeking out through the crack. "We're good," he called in and she nodded. He turned his attention back to his friend and studied him. Jacob was a talented liar. It'd served him well in the FBI when he had to go undercover, but it made him a difficult person to trust. If Ressler hadn't known him for as long as he did and as well as he did, he would have just shrugged the situation off. It was early, he was tired, and things were already weird. He really should just leave it, but a pesky memory of Reddington telling him that Jacob be less inclined to help bring him back in than he thought bouncing around his skull. He should wait until he had time to process, he really should, but instead he found the words falling from his lips without permission. "Jake, I need you to be honest with me about something."

"Sure, Ress."

He swallowed hard, forcing himself to look his partner in the eyes. "I've read the reports about how the whole Garrick thing went down on the outside. Reddington has been saying for a while that someone tipped him off, but even if Grey did, there had to be someone on our end too. That's the only way he could have gotten in where he did. He knew exactly where the security hadn't been covered yet and how much time he had to get Reddington out."

Jacob stiffened very slightly. "Are you accusing me of something?"

Ressler didn't like the sound of that. "Should I be?"

"What the hell, man? What brought this on all of a sudden?"

"I've been thinking it was someone there, but… Reddington had no reason to be here just to tell you Grey was the mole. He might have called or told us on Monday, but coming here, tracking us here, and then leaving when you're the only one he's talked to-"

"Because he's never done things we can't explain before," Jacob snarked, throwing his hands up in the air. "This is unbelievable, Ress. So what? You think I just walked in there and helped take Reddington out at gunpoint? Why would I do that?"

"The adoption," Ressler murmured, the pieces falling into place. "You blame him for it."

"So what?"

"Hell, Jake, what have you done?" He sank down on the step heavily, one hand moving through his hair. Reddington was going to kill him. Even if Jacob thought he had a good reason, if he thought it was valid, he'd handed their CI over to a man that was wanting to kill him. For what? Revenge? "That's not how we do things," he said quietly. "It's our job to protect him, Jake, no matter what he's done to us individually. You can't let Liz's canceling the adoption cause you to let a man die. To hand him over."

Jacob didn't move, but Ressler could tell that he was weighing his options. He closed his eyes slowly and took a shaky break in, releasing it a half a moment later and it was no steadier. His jaw set and he opened his, his gaze piercing. "You think that's why I did it?" Jacob asked, his tone tight. "Yeah, he took the adoption away. It's his fault, but it's done. Killing him won't bring my son back into my life. It won't ensure that the next social worker is willing to understand my past for the adoption case like this one was. Killing him wouldn't do any of that, but handing him to Garrick in exchange for your life would save _you_. You were _dying_ , Ress. What the hell was I _supposed_ to do?" Ressler stared at him, watching his partner, who always had such control, tremble as emotions bubbled to the surface. "If it's him or you, there's no competition. You're… Hell, Ress. You're my best friend. You _know_ that."

Slowly and carefully he stood. Jacob was looking intently down at his running shoes now and Ressler reached out and pulled his hand back twice before finally latching on to the sleeve of his sweatshirt and pulling him forward before he could talk himself out of it. Jacob stiffened at first, but as Ressler wrapped an arm around his back he returned the hug very slowly. "He's going to try to kill you, Jake."

The younger man shrugged a little and pulled away. "I did what I had to to get you out of there. I don't regret it and I won't apologize." His jaw clenched and he looked up. "Are you going to tell Cooper?"

"No," Ressler breathed slowly, the decision going against close to every fiber of his being. It was the few in there that reminded him that Jacob had done it out of loyalty, not the revenge or whatever else Ressler had been terrified had been reality for those moments before his friend caved and told him the truth. "I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing to me for? I'm the one that nearly got our CI killed."

"For thinking you let Garrick buy you off."

It had taken a long time, but he'd told Jacob the story about his father. He knew exactly what that meant and Ressler saw the realization cross his face as to why Ressler had been so angry when that had been his first understanding. He pulled in a steadier breath than before. "I'm not going to betray you, Ress."

"I know."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Just… don't lie to me, Jake. It's a slippery slope if we can't trust each other."

Jacob nodded slowly. "Alright."

"Are you boys done?"

Both men looked over to the door where Liz stood, dressed in one of Jacob's sweatshirts, shorts, and socks, her arms crossed and looking impatient. "Audrey has breakfast going, but if you don't get in here it's going to be cold."

"Coming," Jacob assured her and looked back at his friend. "Are we good?"

"Yeah. After breakfast you're telling me everything though. I don't want any more surprises."

"Deal," his friend acknowledged and they started up the stairs. Ressler wasn't sure what this would mean for going back to the task force Monday morning, but once he knew everything he'd have a chat with Reddington. He'd be damned if the man was going to hurt his partner because Jacob had been trying to protect him, but for now, at least, they were still on vacation, and there would be plenty of time to worry about Monday later.

* * *

TBC

Notes: The bromance in this chapter leaves me a little warm and fuzzy. Ressler has a rough arc coming up next, so I think they needed this.

 It kind of breaks my heart a little bit to know that when we get back to the show in January that Ressler and Jacob are not going to buds like they are in this story. I think I've sunk a little too deep (is that possible?) into the Tessler lol

Next time - Sam Raimo from the Reddington task force turns up dead, bringing the old team back together while Jacob's adopted father is admitted into the hospital for health issues.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Eighteen**

Jacob didn't take vacations from work often because they made him reluctant to go in the following Monday. He had had an exceptionally hard time of it that morning. Liz didn't have classes until that afternoon and she had still been asleep when his alarm started blaring, one arm draped over him with her cheek pressed against the thin material of his t-shirt. It had taken all of his control to move her once the second alarm started howling and get moving. As it stood, he was still late to work.

"Good of you to join us for work today," Ressler groused almost as soon as Jacob stepped into the bullpen. He was standing by Aram's desk, looking over his shoulder at something, but there hadn't been a chance that his partner was going to get past him.

"Hey, gimp. Where's the cane? I thought you had it for another few days?"

"Trying my luck without it. Hey, when you have a second, we need to talk."

"Everything okay?" The sound of Cooper's door shutting drew his attention before his friend could answer. Meera walked out and down the stairs, her expression carefully blank. Apparently everyone was full of great news on that Monday morning.

"Diane Fowler has gone missing and Reddington shows back up saying that he's found all the moles that set him up," she said lowly.

"You think Mr Reddington did something to her?" Aram asked quietly.

"Cooper sure seems to think so."

"She's your boss, technically, right?" Jacob asked. "If she goes missing what does that mean for you with the task force?"

Meera flashed him a grin. "Worried you'll lose me, Phelps?"

"Well Ress doesn't always get my brand of humour quite like you do," he snarked back and watched his partner roll his eyes at the jab.

"Not finding it funny doesn't mean I don't get it, Jake."

"I'm hilarious."

"Just because your wife says so doesn't make it true," Meera chuckled.

"You were wanting to talk about something, Ressler?" Jacob grumbled, only causing his team members' grins to widen.

Well, not Ressler's. He had only managed a small smile at the banter, but his shoulders slumped at Jacob's question. "Sam Raimo passed away over the weekend. I just got word this morning."

Jacob frowned. "That sucks. What happened? I thought he'd gotten out of the field?"

"Who is Sam Raimo?" Meera asked, leaning against Aram's desk and looking like she wanted any excuse not to go back into Cooper's office.

"One of the team that we worked with when we were chasing Reddington," Ressler answered before turning back to Jacob. "They're calling it suicide."

"No way."

"Audrey said that Sarah was really torn up when she called."

"Are they going to have a wake?"

"Yeah. Wednesday. I've been waiting to talk to Cooper and get us a few hours off for it, but he's been held up with Reddington since I got in."

"Damn," Jacob said lowly. "I guess the old team will make it?"

"Yeah. Not the reunion I was looking forward to."

The door to Cooper's office opened up and the Assistant Director exited, motioning them up the stairs and inside. There was a distinct chill as Reddington passed Jacob that the younger man couldn't entirely ignore. He might have survived betraying Reddington, but it seemed like their CI was going to waste no time reminding him it was only because he found him useful. Not that Jacob was any closer to finding out _why_ that was. First things were first. He would let Reddington cool off and he and Ress could attend their former colleague's funeral, then when things had gotten back to normal he could start back in on his search for Masha Rostova and how she connected him to Reddington.

* * *

Liz's gaze swept over the full room where people stood around talking and remembering a man that had worked with Jacob for years. They hadn't been close, per se, not like Jacob and Ressler were, but they had been colleagues, and her husband had respect for the men he'd worked with. As Jacob moved over to his old teammates upon entering she gave his hand a squeeze and started towards Audrey who was sitting at the table as if she were gathering herself for the next round of mingling. She knew Sarah Raimo. She'd known Sam. Liz had come in towards the end of Jacob's career with these men, only meeting them without actually getting to know them very well. Audrey had been there through it all, and from the look she wore, Ressler must have been just as convinced as Jacob had been that this was not a suicide.

"Hey."

Audrey jolted a little, looking startled, and an automatic smile stretched her lips. "Hey, Liz. When did you guys get here?"

"Just walked in."

"It's terrible, isn't it? They were stationed overseas and poor Sarah was telling us how they had to jump through all these hoops and they're still having trouble getting them to release all the information over." She glanced past Liz to where the guys were standing. "Does Jake think it was a suicide?"

"No. He's convinced it wasn't."

"Don's saying the same thing." She pulled in a deep breath and stood. "Bobby said it could have been Raymond Reddington," she said softly, fear wrapped around each word.

"I don't think it's Reddington," Liz said carefully. Apparently Ressler hadn't told Audrey that their team was working with Reddington. Granted, she was pretty sure that Jacob hadn't been cleared to tell her, but that was the way they worked. He was never going to keep something like that from her.

"That's what Bobby's been saying."

"Bobby talks," Liz grumbled. "Come on."

Audrey took her offered hand and gave her a small smile. She had told Liz that it helped to have someone to talk to, to share the fear of being left at home with the understanding that the men they loved might never walk through the door again. Liz never would have thought that she would have found a connection with someone that probably couldn't fight her lovers' enemies if she had the chance, but Audrey Bidwell had a special kind of strength that lay just below the surface that Liz hadn't expected. It did help.

"Elizabeth Phelps," Jonica cheered, his expression splitting into a grin. "I can't believe you're still sticking around with this idiot over here. Hasn't he scared you off yet?"

"I'm rather fond of him," Liz answered with a smile, fingers lacing through her husband's and she leaned into him.

Jonica chuckled. "Well, they say love is blind. Guess you lucked out, Phelps."

"You have no idea," Jacob murmured and leaned over to press a kiss to the side of her head.

"You still on desk duty?" one of the agents that Liz was fairly sure was named Pete asked.

"I'm doing more consulting these days," Jacob answered easily, the partial lie falling from his tongue as easily as if it had been the truth. Even these men that he'd worked with didn't seem to know the difference.

"See, I'd heard that you were teaching at Quantico," Pete laughed. "I had this mental image of you in those goofy glasses, a tweed jacket, and your nose stuck in a book."

Jacob cracked a wide smile. "How much time you spending on that mental image, Pete?" Buzzing came from his pocket and he grabbed his phone, motioning that he'd be right back.

"I think you mellowed him some, Liz," Jonica told her. "Not sure I knew that was possible."

The others chuckled and Ressler rolled his eyes a little. " _Mellowed_ may be a little bit of a stretch."

Liz offered a smile, but her gaze was on her husband. Most of the people in the room wouldn't notice, but she recognized the way his expression closed off to make sure of it. He had ducked himself into a corner and gave one firm nod before ending the call.

She had lost track of the conversation by the time he returned. "We need to head out," Jacob told her softly.

"Everything okay?" Ressler asked.

"Yeah, it's good. I'll see you guys around."

"Let's not wait for a funeral next time," Pete said and Jacob offered him a thin smile.

They were outside and nearly to the vehicle before she caught him by the sleeve. "Babe, what's wrong?"

"Bruce is in the hospital."

* * *

He had been in remission for five years, and while Jacob had always been a little hesitant to believe in miracles, Kelly had been certain that's what it was. It had been bad enough that Jacob had flown home from Japan, taking leave from the task force while they hunted down yet another associate of Reddington's. Bruce had pulled through and Jacob had returned, but he couldn't forget the very real fear he had felt at the idea of losing the man that had become his father.

Liz didn't say anything as they drove, instead simply reaching over and taking his free hand. They hadn't met yet when this had happened last, but she was one of the few people that might actually understand.

Kelly met them in the hallway, a worried expression etched into her features. She moved immediately to wrap her arms around her son. "We don't know anything yet. They're running a lot of tests." She released him and her gaze moved between Jacob and Liz.

"We're coming from a funeral," Liz explained. "One of Jacob's former team members passed away."

"Sam Raimo," Jacob offered. "How's Bruce feeling?"

"He says fine, but he always says fine. _He_ doesn't think he should be here."

That pulled a small smile from her son. "You convinced him?"

"I did. He's been going a little stir crazy in between tests if you want to go in and talk to him."

Jacob nodded and moved past her into the room, finding his adopted father sitting in the hospital bed, glasses perched on his nose, and book in hand. His smile was thin, but at least it reached his eyes. "Hey, Jake. Your mom send you a panicked text too?"

"Oh I got a call," Jacob chuckled. "What's up?"

"Oh, some numbers were off. You know how they are. It could be anything, but throw around the word cancer and your mother panics."

"Well, they admitted you, so something must have been off enough for that."

"He passed out on the kitchen floor this morning," Kelly said as she and Liz entered the room. " _That's_ why they admitted him."

Jacob shot the older man a withering look and Bruce set his book down. "It's fine. It's not as bad as that. You'll see, they'll run their tests and I'll be out of here." He caught Jacob's gaze. "I'll be fine, son."

"I know," the younger man answered with a quirked sort of smile. "I have the afternoon off, so you're stuck with some company."

"Worse things," his father said with a chuckle and Jacob glanced over to Kelly. She looked worn and afraid, and he didn't blame her. The first round with cancer had been hellish, but they'd faced it together. As a child, Jacob never would have thought that he would have a family. After a while he had convinced himself he didn't need nor want one, but Kelly and Bruce had changed that. They had been the ones that had taught him that he could be better than his experience. He had chosen to take the path that he had because of them, channeling the pieces of his personality that had the potential to do so much damage into a job that helped others.

He couldn't channel this though. No amount of out of the box thinking was going to help Bruce. There was no enemy that he could shoot and no puzzle to solve. He felt useless as he took a seat with Liz, putting on a show of easy conversation so that at least they wouldn't worry about him too.

* * *

It was far too early, and the last thing Ressler wanted to do was be anywhere other than home and in bed with Audrey. She had decided to move into his apartment, making it theirs, and she had taken time from that to go with him to Sam's funeral the day before. After everything that had happened, all he really wanted was to take his time, have breakfast with her, and then get into the office and bury himself in his next case when he couldn't rely on her to pull his attention away from the fact that his friend was dead.

But then the call had come in and Dembe had said that Reddington needed to meet with him urgently. So with the snow coming down he had gotten in the car and driven out to the Potomac where he stood, Janico's words from earlier running through his mind. His friend had thought Reddington was responsible for Sam's death, and Ressler couldn't help but remember the last close confrontation between Red and a member of their team. The Concierge of Crime had barely spoken to them since the Garrick incident and had shown up to Ressler's cabin to make it abundantly clear he knew what role Jacob had played in the incident. Just because he hadn't killed him there didn't mean he wouldn't try to elsewhere. It was enough to put Ressler on the edge about the whole thing.

"Donald, my deepest condolences."

Ressler turned, the voice breaking through his thoughts. "Reddington, I swear if you had anything to do with-"

"I had nothing to do with your friend's death. Might I remind you that I reached out to you?"

The younger man bristled. "Yeah, and you'd rather have have Jake in your crosshairs?"

"I'd rather he didn't have me in his," Reddington answered easily. "This isn't about Agent Phelps, though, as as far as I'm aware he wasn't with your little band when you put away our next blacklister."

"And who's that?"

"Mako Tanida."

Ressler snorted. "Tanida is in prison."

"He broke out several days ago. I have my people looking into the situation, but I fear he may be after revenge, Donald. If so, Agent Raimo is simply the first."

"I'll look into it," Ressler answered, his mind moving quickly through everything he needed to get together. It would be difficult for Tanida to get into the country, but if he were trying, it would validate Reddington's concern. He glanced over to the man in the fedora and overcoat. "Why are you giving us this name, Reddington?"

"Tanida is ruthless. If he is coming after your team for revenge of some fashion, he won't stop until he gets it. He'll leave a trail of bodies in his wake."

"And I'm still useful to you?" Ressler grumbled.

"Yes, you are, Donald. As is your foolish partner." He pulled in a deep breath, a cloud showing in the cold air as he released it. "You're worried I may have something planned for him after what he did. I can assure you that I will not cause any harm to your partner, even though he may deserve every ounce of it after his stunt."

"He was protecting me," Ressler argued.

"And Newton was protecting his family. We all make choices, Donald. We should all be prepared to face the consequences of any action we choose to take."

"You said you wouldn't hurt him. So what? You'll hire someone to do it for you?"

"I should, but I won't. He's fool enough to get himself into plenty of trouble on his own. I certainly wouldn't have reached out to _him_ as I have to you today."

So that was it. Reddington wouldn't protect him. That certainly wasn't something Jacob would complain about. It seemed…. out of character for Reddington. "This has to do with whatever connection you have with him, doesn't it? What is it you want with him?"

"You've asked me that before, though I doubt you remember a great deal of what was said in that bunker. I'll say the same now as I did then: that's not something I'm willing to share with you."

"We're going to find out, Reddington."

"I'm sure you'll try. For now, though, your energy is better spent on Tanida." He turned, offering a wave over his shoulder, and left Ressler standing in the snow.

* * *

TBC:

Notes: I felt like the Mako Tanida arc couldn't be left out of this. I've done a lot of thinking about it, because I didn't want the changes in the universe here to take away from Ressler as he was portrayed in the show, but I definitely didn't want to just re-do the same old thing, so there will be some major twists.

Also, happy early Christmas to everyone! I hope  everyone has a safe and fun holiday with those you care about. This will probably be my last update for the week, since it's pretty likely people will be busy Thursday and Friday. I'd be happy to put the next chapter up this weekend, but I wanted to check in and see if anyone would actually have time to read it. I'm incredibly fond of the last scene of chapter nineteen, so I want to make sure it goes up when people would actually have time. Let me know if you would and I'll see what I can do to get it up on Saturday :)

Next time - Tanida continues his hunt and Ressler comes face to face with him, the evidence leading him to a person that he thought he could trust.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Nineteen**

"You look like hell."

It took Jacob a beat longer than it normally would have to look over to Meera when she spoke, his gaze a little blurry and he gave a shrug. "I slept on a couch last night," he answered, a stiffness in his movement as he sat down. "Did I miss the memo we were all coming in early?"

Ressler frowned from his place, watching his partner carefully. Something was off. "Reddington seems to think we're getting picked off by Mako Tanida. We're waiting on Aram getting back to us on the incoming flights into the US. Why were you in a couch?"

"Bruce is in the hospital."

Ressler blinked. "Is that why you guys left early yesterday?"

"Yeah," he answered shortly.

"Jake, if you need to-"

"It's fine. They're releasing him this morning while we wait for the tests and Liz is with them. I need to be here. So, Tanida?"

"We have a match," Aram called as he entered the room. "Mako Tanida entered the US under the name Yasu Itami."

"So Reddington was right," Meera mused.

"About him being in town, yeah." The phone rang off to the side and Ressler sighed. "We should give Bobby and Pete a heads up."

"Agent Ressler?" Aram called. "Agent McGuire… I'm sorry."

Ressler felt a chill settle over him. They _were_ being targeted. He needed to get to get to Audrey. She was in and out of his place all day moving her stuff in. What if Tanida broke in looking for him and found her instead...

"Go. I'll follow the lead," Jacob offered.

Ressler nodded, standing from where he's taken a seat. "Listen, Jake, I know you weren't on board for this one, but-"

"Liz won't be home yet. I'll make sure she stays over at Kelly and Bruce's. You go get Audrey."

"Thank you," Ressler managed, taking off for the lift, digging his phone out as he went.

She didn't answer him on his way to the car. She didn't answer him on the drive home, and when he got there the door was cracked. He was already there.

Ressler drew a steadying breath as he pulled his gun, clicking the safety off of it. He couldn't hesitate. If he did, Audrey might not leave the apartment alive.

He pushed through the door, finding the space empty. It didn't look like someone had ransacked the place, but there was stuff everywhere. He moved through carefully, gun raised, until Audrey rounded a corner and let out a small squeak of surprise. "Don? What-?"

"Did you leave the door open?" he demanded, gaze drifting over the apartment to make sure they were the only ones there.

"Yeah. I told you I was going to bring some stuff by. I didn't want to keep opening and closing the door." Her eyes were fixed on him as he finally lowered the gun. "Don, what's going on?"

"We have to go. I'll tell you in the car."

She stood there for a moment, watching him, and he reached forward and took her hand. Audrey moved into his arms instantly, even if her movements were a little shaky. "We're going to be okay," he promised and kissed the top of her head. "We're going to be okay."

* * *

"I'm- I'm sorry, Mr Reddington, but I can't just… Yes, I'm aware that this is urgent, but-"

Jacob didn't pause as he plucked Aram's headset off his head and set it against his own ear. "You don't have to like me to talk to me about this case, and you didn't keep Ress from bleeding out in a panic room just to have Tanida gut him. If you have information on Mako Tanida or his brother-"

He heard Reddington snort on the other end. " _His brother? Is that the trail you're trying to follow, Agent Phelps?_ "

"It's the one that makes the most sense. Mako wasn't running his business from prison, so his brother-"

" _Is dead,_ " Reddington stated firmly. " _Anyone else that tells you differently is a fool._ "

"That was my team that hunted Tanida down."

" _Yet you weren't there. I have no reason to lie to you about this, Agent Phelps. Aiko Tanida is dead. Find his killer and you'll find the real person Mako is after_."

The line went dead and Jacob frowned as he handed the headset back to Aram. "Reddington says that Aiko Tanida is dead, but I've read the reports. There's no question in them that they say he escaped."

"Reports can be falsified," Meera murmured.

"Pull up the file and look through it for discrepancies. Find the agent that gave that report," Jacob said as he grabbed his coat.

"Where are you going?"

"I have a bad feeling about all of this. I'm going to go give Ress some backup."

* * *

He had met Audrey in his last months at Quantico. She had been visiting a friend in town when he and Jake had gone for drinks at the bar on one of their rare free nights. The spark had been instant, even from across the bar. He had no idea when his then-roommate had ducked out that night, but Ressler and Audrey had been there until closing time, and even then they were all but forced out. He'd gotten her number and the next night he'd called.

From there it had been a wild ride. Her father worked on the Hill, as did her brother, and there had been certain expectations that she was supposed to meet, and dating a federal agent wasn't one of those. It had taken a while for her family to warm to him - and it didn't hurt that he had inherited some money when his parents had died that he could make sure that Audrey lived comfortably - but she had said it didn't matter. All she wanted was him.

Then the task force had formed up and he was gone more than he was home, with leaves uncertain even when he took them. Their focus was Reddington, and that had been what did Ressler and Audrey in. He had tried to make it work, really he had, but the distance and the danger had killed them slowly. They were on and off over the years, the engagement a last attempt to prove to her that he loved her more. It hadn't worked. It hadn't been enough for her, and in his own way he had tried not to blame her for that.

He had never expected to get a second chance, but now that he had that chance, it was the job that was putting her in danger. She was terrified, asking questions as if she wasn't entirely sure she wanted the answers, and the expression she wore when she got them made Ressler's chest tighten.

"Don, I'm scared," she managed to get out before a vehicle slammed hard into his. He heard her scream and gunshots, everything rushing together as adrenalin pumped through him. He pulled over to the side, one bullet pinging too close for comfort.

He wasn't sure how many were there, but he zeroed in on Tanida, the man's gun raised even as Ressler returned fire. He was halfway to rushing him when a shot went off and Tanida's leg buckled under him. Ressler stood in shock a moment, mind coming down off the adrenaline rush enough to try to put together what happened.

"Audrey, get back in the car and keep your head down!" Jacob snapped, gun still raised from where he'd taken the shot at Tanida. "How many more are there?"

"Stay down," Ressler growled as Tanida started to reach for his dropped gun, and the agent kicked it away before looking up at his partner. "I think three. One's down over-"

The shot rang out through the street and Jacob went down hard against the pavement. Ressler ducked down, finding a pair of feet on the other side of the vehicle and he took the shot, bringing the man to the ground, the second one keeping him there. He was on his feet half a second later, Tanida part way there already, and dodged the punch aimed at him. Ressler kicked out, sending the Japanese crashing back down as he connected with his injured leg. He reached down and pulled him up hard, slamming him against the SUV and pulled his cuffs out to make sure he wouldn't move. "Stay down this time, pal," he growled, risking a glance back at Audrey who was poking her head out of the driver's side where she had jumped in after Jacob had yelled at her. "Stay in and lock the doors," Ressler shouted.

"Is Jake…?"

"Dammit, Audrey, just do it," he growled and stood, finding his partner coming to on the street. He knelt down, searching for the injury. He didn't see any blood, but the bullet had to have hit him with the way he'd gone down.

"Vest," Jacob choked out, struggling to sit up.

Ressler loosed a relieved breath. "You hate those things."

"Today I love them," Jacob chuckled, wincing as he did, his hand going to his chest where there was a hole in his shirt. If he hadn't been wearing one Ressler was certain that he would have been killed instantly.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just bruised. Go check on Audrey. I'll call it in."

"What are you even doing here, Jake?"

"Saving your ass, apparently," the younger man answered with a grin.

"You need help up?"

"As long as those guys are down and secure, I think I'm going to sit here a minute."

"Come on, Phelps, you going soft?" Ressler tried to joke, his voice still sounding strained even to his own ears. It certainly wasn't going to fool Jacob.

"I took a bullet to the chest. I think I'm allowed to sit a second. Go check on your girlfriend, would you?"

Ressler nodded after half a beat and moved to make sure that Tanida's men would stay down. Once he had he moved back to his battered SUV to find Audrey waiting impatiently for him, silent tears streaking down her cheeks, and as soon as he gave the motion she had the door open and was in his arms. She held onto him, a sob escaping her as he let her cling, whispering soothingly to her. "We're okay. Everyone's okay, sweetheart."

"Jake?"

"Jake was wearing a vest. He's fine."

"That could have been you," she whispered brokenly.

_Or you_ , he didn't say, but he knew it was true.

"Hey, you guys okay?" Ressler turned to see his partner moving slowly toward him. "We have EMT's on their way. Audrey, you have, uh, little blood there. You okay?" He motioned to her head and Audrey's hand came up carefully to inspect it.

"I think I hit my head when we crashed. I'm okay."

"We'll have the EMT look at it just to be safe," Ressler murmured.

"After she gets checked out, Meera's going to meet us at my folks' place." Jacob shifted his gaze to Audrey. "I figured you might feel a little more comfortable with Liz rather than all-out protective custody."

There was something in his voice that Ressler didn't like. Jacob was holding back, but he wasn't sure yet if it was just from Audrey or him as well. In all likelihood it had something to do with him being in the right place at exactly the right time.

Audrey nodded slowly. "Thanks."

Sirens sounded around them and Ressler stepped closer, gaze sweeping out over the wreckage. "I don't know how you knew, but thank you."

Jacob offered a quirked smile, but then dropped his voice as Audrey's attention was drawn by the approaching officers. "Aiko Tanida is dead and has been since he was reported missing."

"What?" Ressler managed, something about the situation feeling off.

"Who was in the vehicle with him that day? Whoever it was was either in on it or has a lead."

"Bobby Jonica rode with him. He'll be able to give us a play by play on everything that happened."

Jacob's expression tightened. "You don't think…?"

"That Bobby is dirty? No, I don't. I know him, Jake. Hell, _you_ know him. We'll talk to him and get the information we need once we get things set up at your parents' place for Audrey and Liz." He watched his friend nod slowly and didn't argue it further. If it had been anyone else, they'd be bringing him in for questioning, but this was Bobby. He was one of Ressler's closest friends. They were looking for a dirty cop capable of slipping in and taking over a drug trade, not a decorated and retired agent. He wasn't sure what the explanation was yet, but once Audrey was safe, he would get to the bottom of it.

* * *

Liz had always known that that the Jones' had halfway adopted their son's best friend somewhere along the way, and apparently that affection for Ressler extended to Audrey. Jacob had gone out of his way to assure her that they were out of danger there. Sam and Pete's murderer had been arrested and they were tying up loose ends. Having everyone stay with Kelly and Bruce was a precaution. To Liz, though, it sounded like her husband was doing his best to leave a key piece of information out.

"Thank you."

Liz turned, finding Jacob lingering at the entrance to the room. "For what?"

"Helping with Audrey. You handle things like this better than she does."

His wife ducked her head. "Maybe," she answered softly. "Maybe I just try to fake it and hope you come home at the end of the day."

She watched him cringe, feeling a little guilty over the redirect from what had been meant as a compliment from him. She crossed the room to him, wrapping her arms around his middle and holding on tight, her cheek pressed against his jacket. "I love you."

"I love you too. I'm coming home, Lizzie. I promise I am."

"I know." She tightened her grip on him. He needed to wrap the case up, but she was finding it harder and harder to let him walk into this. If she could find a way to tell him, a way to explain who she was without sending him running, she could help him. Well wasn't that a funny thought? Masha Rostova was willing to help in a federal investigation. Maybe he really had changed her.

Liz felt him wince and pulled back. "Babe?"

Jacob gave her a strained smile. "I'm fine," he started and Liz glared. "I was wearing a vest."

What he was saying clicked immediately and it took everything she had in her to allow for the delay the wife he knew would have had. "Someone shot you?"

"The vest stopped it. I'm fine. Just a little bruised."

Liz pulled his jacket open to see the whole in his shirt he'd hidden from immediate attention and she frowned. "You got the guy?"

"Yep."

"Good." She still thought she would follow up on it. She had a few favours to pull if she wanted them and she had no qualms with the man that had tried to kill her husband not making it to trial. The last one that had shot him certainly hadn't.

"Jake, Meera's here," Ressler said from behind them and Liz peeked around her husband.

"Don, is it too much to ask to have you make sure he's _always_ wearing a vest? Really?"

Ressler looked startled at the demand. "Jake, you heard your wife."

"I did hear my wife," Jacob chuckled and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "C'mon. We'll introduce you to Meera."

The petite woman hardly looked intimidating, but Liz knew well enough how deceiving looks could be. She gave her just the right smile, but felt her gaze linger half a moment longer than she was comfortable with before returning it. "It's good to finally put a living person to the name and the photo."

"Photo?" Liz echoed.

Meera looked between she and Jacob. "The one he keeps on his desk?"

Despite everything that was happening, Liz felt a small smile quirk her lips. "I didn't know you kept a picture of me at work."

"Isn't that what people do?" her husband asked and Ressler snorted.

"We've talked about this, Jake. That's never the go-to answer for anything."

Liz rolled her eyes a little. "Come home."

"Every time," he answered and leaned in for a kiss.

"Before you both go," Meera prompted, motioning off to the side.

Liz stayed where she was, gaze sweeping over the room to make sure she wouldn't be noticed if she inched forward to listen.

Audrey, who had been sitting quietly on the couch, moved towards the wall that would be the best place to listen in. She gave Liz an expectant look. "Aren't you tired of being kept in the dark when it affects us too?" she demanded in a whisper.

Blue eyes blinked at her, and Liz saw a woman at a tipping point. She had already left Ressler once when when things had become too much, but now it seemed that she was taking a different path. One that Liz could certainly understand. "Yeah," she answered simply as they moved to listen.

"I'm telling you guys, I know Bobby. I don't give a damn what Red's financial guru found. Bobby's not dirty."

"So far, everything Tanida has said since his arrest has matched up with what Luli found. She's willing to provide the findings to us," Meera stated, "but unless we bring him in it will be too little too late."

"Listen, man, Jonica will get it," Jacob added in. "We'll go, we'll tell him we need to bring him in."

There was a pause and Audrey shot Liz a distressed look.

"Fine," Ressler huffed. "We'll bring him , but we give him the benefit of the doubt, you hear me Jake? He's one of us."

"I know, Ress."

"Cooper and I personally know every agent around the perimeter," Meera said. "Your families are safe."

* * *

Jacob wasn't sure he was comfortable with the situation on whole. It wasn't his parents or Liz and Audrey he was worried about. It was his partner. Ressler was a loyal man. It took a while to earn that loyalty, but once you had it he would go to hell and back for you. While he usually had no problem separating opinions from evidence, Jacob thought that his partner's close friendship with Bobby Jonica was clouding his judgement. If Jonica was dirty, it could break him.

Thin lips turned downward as he glanced over to the driver's seat, Ressler's expression set firmly. "Ress," he began, but re wives a glare for his efforts.

"Don't. Benefit of the doubt, remember?" He sighed, stress rolling off of him in waves. "I don't get it. You worked with him too."

"And I don't have anything against Bobby," Jacob answered defensively. "I'd grab a beer with Bobby on any normal occasion, but Ress, we have to follow the evidence."

"You never liked him very well, did you?"

Jacob rolled his eyes. "I just wasn't as close to him as you were. We worked together. That was it. You two were friends." They pulled up outside the hotel that Jonica was staying at and Jacob looked over at his partner. "It may be a lot of coincidences."

Ressler snorted and stepped out. Jacob followed him to the elevator and up to the floor where their former colleague was staying while he was in DC. Jacob couldn't help but notice the nice hotel. He knew how much they were paid and even if Jonica had made all the right investments over the years it seemed a little lavish.

They knocked once, then twice, before a pointed look made Ressler sigh before pulling the card they had received downstairs out of his jacket pocket and slipping it into the door. It hit the latch and he moved back to let Jacob ease it off with skill that would have usually earned him a teasing jab about his less than conventional childhood.

There was nothing as they entered, the suite quiet, and Jacob's hand lingered near his weapon where it would have already been drawn in any other scenario. His instincts kicked into overdrive as he slipped around the corner and found himself staring down the barrel of a gun. He drew his own as he heard Ressler shout behind him, "Bobby, it's just us!"

Jonica heaved a sigh and lowered his weapon, Jacob following the motion just a bit more slowly. "Damn, boys, is there a reason you're breaking into my hotel room guns drawn?"

"Only drew mine when you drew yours," Jacob answered.

"There's been an update in the Tanida case," Ressler cut in. We need you to come down to our office for some questions around the take down."

Jacob's gaze swept over the room at the bags that were nearly packed. "Going somewhere? he asked, slipping past the older man and towards them. He had a hunch that he hoped, for Ressler's sake, was wrong.

"Yeah, I was going to fly out first thing in the morning. What are you doing, Phelps?"

Long fingers plucked the passport out of the open bag and flipped it open. "Funny, because you've got someone else's name in your passport."

One glance up set Jonica on edge and Ressler barely caught him before he bolted for the door. "I didn't want to believe it, Bobby. I was willing to give you a chance to explain why the money trail for Tanida's business seems to lead back to you. I _told_ them you weren't dirty," Ressler stressed, his expression torn.

"Donnie, just let me explain," Jonica begged, but he had to have seen the same switch that Jacob did. They both knew how the other man's father had died. They both knew just how deeply the betrayal set with him.

"I've seen a lot of go-bags over my the years, Jonica, but I think you missed the point," Jacob quipped, motioning to the large bag. He reached a hand out. "Gun."

"Pete and Sam are _dead_ , Bobby," Ressler growled. "For what?"

"That was Tanida," Jonica argued, slowly obliging Jacob's demand. "See, if I had anything to hide would I give you my gun?"

"You just know you outshoot either of us." Jacob's lips twitched downward. "Look, we have Tanida in custody. He told our people everything. Ress wanted to give you a chance to tell your side, but fake passports are pretty telling."

"He was after you. You're the reason they're dead. What could possibly be worth that?"

"I've been chasing down scumbags all over the world. You know what they pay, Donnie. I never knew Sam and Pete would-"

The blow landed solidly against Jonica's jaw, snapping his head around and Jacob almost winced at the sound of it. Ressler landed another blow, his expression tight as the older man fell back, nose bleeding from the second blow. It wasn't until he drew his gun that Jacob jumped into action, taking hold of his arm and pulling him back. "Ress, no. Stop."

"The son of a bitch is the reason they're dead," Ressler growled, his voice trembling under the strain. "He-"

"Yeah, he is. He's a bastard and a half, but you're better than this, Ress. You're not the type to shoot a man in cold blood."

"Leave that to you, huh, Phelps?" Jonica asked from his place on the floor.

"Keep your mouth shut or we'll see how well you talk with a broken jaw," Jacob snapped before turning his attention back to his partner. "We'll take him in and he'll rot behind bars."

"Pete and Sam are _dead_ , Jake. There's no coming back from that. He doesn't deserve to walk away from this."

"He won't," Jacob promised. "He's a dirty cop, Ress. He'll go to prison and there won't be a day that goes by that he won't pay for what he did in the worst ways. You giving up a piece of yourself won't change what happened to them either."

Ressler's hand was steady as he stared at the man he'd thought was his friend and the realization of how right Jacob really was seemed to settle in over Jonica. "Donnie, you can't send me there. You do know what they'd do to me. You can't do that, Donnie."

"What did I tell you about talking?" Jacob snapped.

Slowly Ressler started lowering his weapon, his expression tight. He risked a look over at his partner, and all at once Jonica was on his feet rushing him. Jacob moved on instinct, his gun raised and the shot went off without pause, hitting his former teammate square in the chest. Jonica went down and Jacob stood there for a moment, gun still raised, and waited for him to squirm.

Ressler moved around and knelt to the floor. He paused there for a moment before letting his eyes slip closed. "He's gone."

"Ress-"

"He pulled a gun, Jake."

Jacob watched him for a moment, reading his partner's gaze. His expression was fairly even, but there was turmoil in his eyes. A man that had been his friend had betrayed him so deeply that it would haunt him, but at least, if nothing else, _he_ hadn't been the one to end it. Ressler might be in pain, but his conscious was clear. Jacob had always been the one to do what needed to be done on any team that he'd ever worked with. Somehow this was fitting. "I'll call it in, Ress. Why don't you go check on Audrey? I'll call you if Cooper can't wait until tomorrow for the paperwork."

Ressler nodded, his gaze tugging back to his former friend even as the sirens started sounding outside. "Thanks, Jake."

"Anytime." He watched the older man turn, starting for the door before swallowing hard and lifting the phone to his ear, hearing it ring and he read off his information that was needed to confirm his identity. All he wanted to do was wrap things up and get home to his wife.

* * *

Ressler and Audrey were long since gone by the time Jacob got to his parents' house. The porch light was on, but as far as he could tell from the outside the only light on in the house was the kitchen, so he tapped lightly on that door and Kelly let him in.

"Liz fell asleep after Don picked up Audrey. It's been a long day for everyone," she said as she moved back over to the sink where she was cleaning up. She had been baking, and if the hour was any indication, it was stress baking. "Bruce went and got Hudson from your place, so you're both welcome to stay here for the night. At this point, by the time you got home and got settled it would be close to time to get up."

"Thanks," he murmured. "Have you guys heard anything from the doctors yet?"

Not yet. We're in a holding pattern until the test results come in."

She motioned for him to take a seat at the kitchen table. He did and she set a mug of tea in front of him as she joined. As she always did, Kelly sat quietly until he was ready to talk. It took several long minutes of silence before he pulled in a deep breath and risked his voice. "I need to know something and I need you to be as unbiased as possible." He waited until she nodded and fixed his gaze on the mug. "Am I a good person?"

To her credit, Kelly didn't jump in with an affirmation. Instead she waited, sipped at her own tea thoughtfully, and then finally spoke, her voice full of conviction. "I believe so."

"Not… Do I do good things or do I work for a job that helps people," he whispered. "I mean _me_. At my core."

"Jacob, honey, you're the only one that can really answer that." She reached forward and touched his hand. "What happened?"

He swallowed hard. "Bobby Jonica - that Ress and I used to work with? - died today."

"Honey, I'm so sorry."

"I killed him." He waited a beat before risking a glance up at her. "He was…. He betrayed us and we were about to arrest him. I had to talk Ress of all people down from beating his brains in, and he… He went for Ressler's gun and I put one in his chest. I didn't even flinch. I worked with the man for years. I watched his back and he watched mine, but I don't feel guilty." He pulled in a deep breath, feeling it rattle around in his chest a little. Reddington had told him that he took the job with the FBI not because he really cared about doing good, but because he was trying to play a part to appease the few people he cared about. It was something Jacob tried not to linger too long on, but in moments like these, those moments when he _should_ have writhing with guilt of making an impossible decision and he wasn't, he felt the words weigh on him more than the guilt ever could.

Kelly squeezed his hand and took a breath. "Do you remember when Bruce and I first took you in?" she asked, catching his gaze and holding it. "You were...difficult." Jacob snorted and she held her hand up to quiet the snarky reply. "You were. You'd already lived such a hard life and it had hardened you more than a child should ever be. It taught you not to trust anyone, and of all the ways you've changed over the years, that hesitation to trust is one thing you've held onto. Right or wrong, I really can't say, but it's who you are and I love you."

"Love you too, Mom," he answered softly.

A smile tilted her lips. "I know you do, sweetie, and I know how hard earned your love and your trust is. It sounds like you saved Don's life today, so yes, I think you make hard choices. Sometimes those are good choices and sometimes they are bad, but in the end _I_ will always see you as a good man."

"Yeah, well, you didn't see a thief either," Jacob mumbled.

"No, I saw a little boy that had convinced himself that no one could love him," she answered. "Sometimes I still see that in you. Don't be too hard on yourself, please? You don't have to try to feel the way others around you might or might not feel. You process things a little differently, that's all."

Jacob felt a small but real smile pull his lips ever so slightly. "Thanks, Mom."

"Any time," she answered as the beeper on the oven went off. She stood, grabbing an oven mitt as she opened it up. "I don't suppose you can tell me what sort of craziness you and Don have gotten yourselves into, can you?"

"I really can't."

She nodded. "I didn't think so. Well at least I've met your team now. I don't have to worry _quite_ as much."

"How's Bruce feeling?" Jacob asked, swivelling the conversation around. "You said he went and got Hudson?"

"He says he's fine. Stubborn. I thought he was resting in the back until he showed up with the dog." She shook her head. "If a stubborn streak can be learned, we know where you got yours from."

"Not that you're ever stubborn."

"Not at all." She handed him a cookie. "Sleep well, sweetie. Please tell me you're going in late tomorrow."

"Yeah."

"Good." She pressed a kiss to the side of his head. "Don't doubt yourself, Jacob. Those of us that know you well, we never lose faith in you."

"Never might be a stretch," he teased and stood, offering her a hug. "Thank you for everything today."

"Don was close with Agent Jonica, wasn't he? Is he going to be okay?"

"He has Audrey. She'll help him out. Night, Mom."

"Night, hon," she said and he shuffled off to the guest room where Liz was sleeping on the bed that he'd grown up sleeping in. He paused at the door, a tired smile stretching his lips at the sight of her curled into the pillows and Hudson asleep across her feet. The dog stirred, but didn't do much more than wag his tail as Jacob slipped into the bed next to his wife. "Love you, Lizzie," he whispered and she mumbled it back.

Jacob wasn't sure how _good_ of a man he was, but he was certain he was a lucky one. Anything else was a work in progress.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I hope everyone had a great Christmas! When I have days off (which is rare) I have a tendency to poke around at things and figure out how things work. I managed to get a handle on how to stitch together videos so that I can create gifs that I might not have been able to create otherwise and I've started putting together mini gif sets as previews for the chapters. I have a couple of them up for this chapter and you can find them at takadasaiko [dot] tumblr [dot] com if you want to check them out. They're a lot of fun and I'm hoping I can do at least one little sneak peek for each chapter from here on out.

Next time - Samar Navabi contacts the task force, looking for a man named Justin Masterson who has kidnapped two Israeli scientists to interrogate them. She's following his trail through a former colleague of his: Masha Rostova.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty**

If he had to sit through one more psych evaluation, Jacob was sure he really would lose his mind. In the past two weeks he felt like he had spent more time sitting in a shrink's office than doing his job. He crossed paths with Ressler either going in or coming out nearly every day, and the threat was over both of their heads that if they didn't pass the evaluations that they would both be put on desk duty. Jacob was sure he'd had enough of that over the course of his two year stretch between task forces. He might not give them exactly what they wanted, but he had faith in his abilities to run the psychologist around enough that it wouldn't last too much longer.

"Special Agent Phelps?"

Jacob turned mid stride, the unfamiliar voice calling out just as he stepped out of his vehicle at the Post Office garage. He spotted a woman he'd never seen there before, tall and dark complected. There was something a little false about the smile she wore and her gaze was entirely focused on him.

"Samar Navabi," she introduced herself with an outstretched hand.

Jacob just looked at it. "Okay," he said blandly, his mind racing to place her. She couldn't have gotten into the garage without some level of clearance, but she knew him while he didn't know her. That was enough to set him on edge. "This is a restricted site."

Her smile didn't fade and pulled out a temporary access card that opened the door to the lift to take them down to the Post Office. "I'm working as a liaison between our two organisations on a case that we'll be working together on. I believe you've been looking into a woman named Masha Rostova." She stepped into the lift and turned to him expectedly.

Jacob stared at her a moment. These were the reasons he hated being out of the office. Things happened and no one told him. He followed after her. "Listen…"

"Navabi."

"Navabi, I don't know you, so until I talk to my boss, you're not getting anything from me about any of my cases." He turned his gaze to focus on the yellow door as the lift jolted into motion.

"The interesting thing was that even though it appears that some of our lines of research on this matter have crossed, Assistant Director Cooper was not aware of the name."

Jacob bristled a little. Cooper was aware that he'd been looking into the connection that would explain Reddington's insistence on their task force, but until something of substance came up, they didn't talk about it. He certainly didn't know why this woman was trying to dig into it. As soon as the doors opened he turned towards her. "Cooper's the only one that can clear me releasing information to you." He stepped out, not bothering to wait for her, and strode forward with purpose. He spotted Ressler standing in the middle of the bullpen. "Hey, missed passing you in the hallway this morning."

"I passed my eval. I hear you're still waiting on yours. Losing your touch?" His gaze traveled past him. "That the Mossad agent?"

"Is that what she is?" Jacob asked, not bothering to look back and doing his best to ignore the jab.

"Meera said she's been waiting on you."

"Great. I seem to be popular with everyone that I don't want to be."

"Cooper also wanted to see us as soon as you got in."

Jacob glanced up towards the Assistant Director's office. The door opened and Cooper walked out, followed by Meera Malik. "Agent Phelps, I just got off the phone with Dr Freeman and you've been cleared. I see you've met Agent Navabi."

Jacob resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"She's looking for information on a woman that you've been looking into in connection to the case we've been discussing." His gaze traveled to the Mossad agent. "Perhaps you'd like to fill these gentlemen in on what you're looking for and what your case is."

Navabi nodded. "Agent Mojtabai, if you could pull up the file I provided?" she asked, catching the technician's attention.

"Me?" he asked, plucking an earbud out of his ear and focusing in.

"You are Agent Mojtabai, aren't you?" she asked, a small smile perking her lips.

"I… yes. Of course. No one ever calls me that," he answered with a small smile, and his fingers flew across his keyboard, pulling up the information that she'd asked him for. A pair of photo ID badges, one of a man and the other a woman appeared on his screen and then on the large, overhead screens. They were middle aged, both wearing glasses and lab coats with Hebrew writing next to the photos. "Sara and Benjamin Levin are two of Israel's top scientists in chemical research into fighting some of the worst diseases mankind faces. They were abducted from their DC hotel two nights ago. Our person of interest entered the United States under the name Philip Matthews. As far as we can tell, his real name is Justin Masterson."

"Any reason you're just now reaching out to us now?" Ressler asked.

"We would like this handled quietly and efficiently. While following the trail after Masterson I crossed an open inquiry into Masha Rostova through similar contacts. That led me here. To you, Agent Phelps."

Jacob straightened just a little and he could feel Ressler's gaze on him, his partner obviously remembering the name and its significance. "I don't have a lot on the woman," he offered with a small shrug.

"Why were you looking so hard for her?"

Jacob shot her a lazy smile. "Possible connection to something I'm looking into. It's not pertinent to this. If you don't have more, we may need to find another route to your missing scientists."

Navabi didn't appear phased. "With these cases, I find that sometimes we know more than we previously expected."

"Doesn't declassify a case though," he responded. "Look, the most solid lead I had was a connection to a shelf corporation that didn't pan out because it was shut down before we got to it. If you have more on her, I'm all ears. A photo would be awesome."

"I don't have a photo. If the rumours are true and she really is the daughter of Katarina Rostova, it could explain quite a bit of why she's so difficult to track," Navabi said. "What I do know is that she has links to the same organization as Masterson. We have pieces of information on it, and I'm sure you have sources you can follow up with the verify some of what we do not know." She shot Cooper a pointed look and Jacob found himself glancing between them, trying to figure out if this woman somehow knew they were working with Reddington.

"What organization?" Ressler asked, arms crossed over his chest.

"It doesn't have a name, at least not that we know, nor do we know who runs it, but men and women of exceptional skill seem to gravitate towards it. One theory is that there's actually a level of the organization that trains these individuals specifically to their purpose. Rostova and Masterson are two of these operatives and have been known to work together before. We think that Rostova is here in DC as well, likely on a mission unconnected, but if she is, Masterson may reach out to her for help."

"Justin Masterson does come with a mug shot," Meera said and a new photo appeared of a young man, perhaps in his mid thirties or so, with green eyes and shortly cropped hair. The mug shot showed his face to be cut and bruised, like he'd put up one hell of a fight before they took him in. "The photo has already been delivered to all airports, train stations, and bus stations. After we confirm a few details on our end, we'll be releasing it to the media as well."

"We hope to pen him in," Navabi agreed.

"I'll make the call," Ressler agreed, pulling his coat around his shoulders. He started for the door, but paused, turning around. "You coming, Jake?"

Jacob frowned. "He hates me, remember?" he said, referring to Reddington.

"He doesn't have to know you're coming until we're already there," Ressler answered cheerfully.

"Fine," the younger man sighed. Well, there went his lunch plans with Liz. She wasn't going to be happy about that.

* * *

"Just once, I'd like to drive. Just once."

Ressler turned and looked at his partner, rolling his eyes a little at the innocent expression he wore. It would have fooled anyone that hadn't driven with him before. "I prefer making it to the meet with Reddington, thank you."

"Oh come on. Are you still holding onto that _one_ time?"

"It was more than one time, because I was stupid enough to think it was only one time."

Jacob snorted and took a swipe for the keys in Ressler's hand, but the older man knew it was coming and dodged. "It's not like you've never wrecked a car."

"Yeah, but mine didn't land us in the hospital."

"Neither did mine!"

"Not the first wreck. The second one," Ressler reminded him as he unlocked the SUV and circled around it to climb into the driver's seat.

His partner paused on the other side, looking very much like he was trying to remember something. "I have a few blank spots in my memory during that op," he admitted.

"Yeah, because you crashed the car and were out for nearly a day. Until my driving lands either of us in the ICU, I'm the designated driver."

"Okay, that's fair," Jacob relented and Ressler snorted.

"Put your damn seatbelt on."

"You're driving. Of _course_ I'm going to put my seatbelt on," he answered with a grin that reminded Ressler just why he'd broken the younger man's nose their first week into Quantico together.

The drive was, thankfully, uneventful. Jacob filled what might have been silence with mostly trivial talk, the only thing of any real importance that Bruce had finally gotten his test results in and the cancer scare had been just that. His blood pressure medication had been off kilter and that was what had caused him to pass out the day he was admitted into the hospital. For now, he was still in remission, and even though Jacob would never admit it, Ressler could see the underlying relief in his expression.

Somehow, of course, the conversation came back around to the driving about the time they parked. Ressler never would have heard the end of it if they'd had so much as a close call. They made it to the park that Reddington had agreed to meet him - well, _them_ , but Red didn't know that yet - and Ressler pulled up to find the criminal mastermind sitting on a swing, casually pushing off the ground with his leather shoes and speaking with Dembe who stood next to him. He looked over as the two agents stepped from the vehicle and frowned. "I thought I'd made myself clear about my dealings with Agent Phelps from here on out, Donald."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "You're not dead, are you? Drop it already."

Dembe took a protective step between his employer and Jacob and the agent stiffened a little. Ressler reached out and put a hand on his arm before turning his attention back to Reddington. "He's the one you were so determined was on this team. You want him off?"

"No, I simply don't want to look at him."

"You get that you sound like you're five, don't you?" Jacob snapped.

Ressler heaved a sigh. "Stop antagonizing him, please. It'll make this go a lot quicker." He didn't wait for Reddington to give him the go-ahead or for Jacob to pop off again, but instead simply stepped forward. "What do you know about a woman named Masha Rostova? Apparently she's the daughter of a Russian agent of some kind."

Reddington stiffened at the name and one quick glance over to Jacob showed that neither of the agents had missed it. Ressler's lips thinned and he waited.

"We know that you are at least aware of her," Jacob prompted. "Her name has come up linked in multiple cases that you've given us. Who is she?"

Slowly, Reddington stood, pushing his sunglasses a little further up the bridge of his nose and he turned his gaze so that it felt like he might be looking through Ressler rather than at him, as if he were purposefully ignoring Jacob. "What exactly are you looking for, Donald?" he asked carefully.

"We have reason to believe she's linked to an organization. A school?" he asked, a little uncertain, but there was a flicker in Red's gaze that said he was on the right track.

"She's connected with this man," Jacob added, pulling the picture of Masterson from his jacket and handing it over.

Surprisingly, Reddington took it. "Justin Masterson," he mused. "I know the man. He's one of the Major's."

"The what?" Ressler asked.

"Not a _what_ , Donald, a _who_. The Major. He runs a finishing school of a sort. The best of its kind. He takes wayward youths from the streets, from the foster care system-" he shot a pointed look in Jacob's direction- "and he molds them. Young boys and girls with high IQ's that exhibit sociopathic tendencies. He trains them to be assassins, spies, and the sort. They work for him in whatever capacity he chooses. They are the best you will ever come across. This man here-" he tapped the photo- "is a skilled interrogator as well as a talented assassin. In certain circles he is known for being able to keep a man alive and just barely able to speak for weeks if he chooses. As far as I'm aware, he's never failed to pull information from someone."

"Well he's kidnapped a couple of Israeli scientists," Jacob said, "and Mossad is after him. The link that they're following is Rostova."

Reddington licked his lips and handed the photo back. "She's not the one you're looking for."

"Pretty sure she is," the dark haired agent pressed and the older man turned to level a glare.

"I assure you, Agent Phelps, you of all people should not be looking for her."

"Then I'm right. Whatever your connection to me is has to do with her. Who is she? Someone from the foster system that I knew? Someone from-"

"Jake, focus. You two can cover this on your own time," Ressler said firmly. "Red, these people's lives are at stake. I don't know who this woman is to you, but we need her to find him. Can you put us in touch?"

"I'll see what I can do," he agreed.

"Thank you."

"We're not done on this subject, Reddington," Jacob growled.

Reddington's lips tipped downward at the corners. "I'm sure we're not."

* * *

Liz could barely reach her keys around the bags hanging off either shoulder. A purse, a computer bag, and two bags full of groceries that Jacob had promised to use to make dinner if she would pick them up on her way home. She finally got her hands on the keys and reached for the door, frowning very slightly at the tiny scratches she spotted on the lock. She wasn't sure if one of them had been clumsy or she should be waiting for Raymond Reddington to rip her life apart again.

She got in the front door, and then the second, concerned by the lack of Hudson there. She could hear muffled barking upstairs once she was inside, and every muscle was tensed and ready for something as she dropped the bags on the floor. Carefully she inched forward and found the hall into the kitchen clear.

A hand came around her mouth, gagging her, and Liz lashed out hard, ramming her elbow into her attacker and swinging around, landing a hard kick into him until she recognized the dark haired man that stumbled back. " _Justin_?" she hissed. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I need your help, Masha. You know I wouldn't risk your cover of it weren't important," he answered, palms held outward.

"Important to _you_ ," she snapped.

"And you owe me for Philadelphia."

"Not here. Not now. You have to go."

"If not here and now there won't be a next time. The feds have my photo up at all the exit points. It's only a matter of time before they put it up on the news."

She quirked an eyebrow. "Are you telling me that you can't steal a car and get yourself out?"

Justin glared. "I can't leave. I have a job to finish. My timetable has been cut in half and my contact backed out for the safe house. I need your help."

Liz snorted. "The man I married for my job is a fed. You're asking me to jeopardize _my_ mission for yours."

"You owe me," he repeated. "Just tell the fed you had to leave town for something. Anything. I'll only need a couple days tops."

A sigh escaped her. The likelihood that Jacob was working this particular case… Well, it would be her luck, but she could play it safe. "I have a place," she said reluctantly.

"Let's go."

Liz glanced up the stairs where Hudson was still causing a racket. Without a word she moved forward and scratched an address down on a piece of paper. "I have to do wrap things up so that I don't raise flags."

"Just wait until I'm gone to let that mutt of yours out," he grumbled, taking the offered paper. "Damn thing bit me."

"Don't piss off the guard dog," she offered with a shrug. "I'll just be a couple hours behind you. Take the backdoor."

He didn't say another word as he left, the door shutting behind him. She loosed a breath she hadn't realized that she had been holding. Things were getting too complicated.

Liz put the groceries away and let Hudson out, kneeling to scratch him behind the ears and check for blood when she heard the door open downstairs and Jacob called her name. "Don't tell your dad," she whispered and stood. "Up here!" she hollered.

She could hear her husband's footsteps up the stairs and Hudson took off to meet him. "Hey, bud," he greeted. He looked up when Liz exited and a smile tilted his lips. "Hey, babe. You okay?"

"Yeah. I just got a call. It's super last second, but the school needs me to fly up to Princeton for this seminar. Candice was supposed to go, but her son has the flu and…" She stopped, not liking the expression he was wearing. "What?"

"Nothing," he managed, putting on a smile for her.

"It's not nothing. What is it?"

"It's just been a long day. I was looking forward to dinner. I'm guessing you're heading out tonight, huh?"

She reached forward, taking his hand. "I have to."

"I know. It's fine. Not like my job didn't spoil lunch," he muttered and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "You need help packing?"

"No, it's alright."

"Any idea when you'll be back?"

"It was all kind of sudden. I'm sure I'll know when I get there."

He nodded and kissed her. "I'm going to take Hudson for a walk. You won't leave before I get back?"

She tried for a smile. "Of course not." Liz watched as he and Hudson walked down the stairs and she closed her eyes, steadying herself. This man that trusted so few people believed her without batting an eye. She had learned long ago how to push the guilt down, but it bubbled dangerously inside of her as he turned from the base of the steps, Hudson climbing the wall in anticipation. "Love you."

Liz swallowed hard. "You too," she answered thickly and watched him walk out.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: So, one of my favourite things to do with AU's is to sprinkle in little parallels, like the one at the end. That scene in canon where Jacob is taking Hudson out for a walk (well, supposedly) and is really running kills me every time because you can just feel his indecision. I wish we had gotten a look inside of his head during that like we're getting with Liz in this story. I feel like fewer people would hate Jacob lol.

Next time - Liz meets up with Berlin's operative Jolene Parker while Red reaches out to Samar to make a deal meant to keep Masha Rostova's identity secret, but it may not be enough.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-One**

It was a good three hours before Liz got away from the house and to the location she had given Justin. She had a bag with her and wasn't looking forward to sharing the space with him. With the kind of luck she was having, he would expect her help with it. If it sped the process along maybe that was worth it.

The space was part of a warehouse that no one visited often. It was mostly storage kept in what she had found to be nearly soundproof units that were big enough for her to keep a vehicle in. She was grateful for the soundproofing as she entered that evening and heard screams from around the corner. She sighed, peeling off her scarf and hat.

"Thought you weren't coming," Justin said as he rounded the corner, peeling off blood splattered gloves.

"I'm on assignment. I couldn't just drop everything."

"Well, you're here now. Might as well help."

"And what do you think this location is? No, they don't get to see my face. Did you miss what I said about my husband being a fed. If one of them gets loose and ID's me, it'll blow my entire op out of the water."

He rolled his eyes. "Don't be so dramatic. They're blindfolded and not getting away."

Liz frowned, but followed him around the corner to see two people. One was tied to a chair, the other strapped to a table he had hauled over. Neither appeared to be altogether with it, and she assumed that the way he had been handling them on his own by keeping them heavily sedated. "Who are they?"

"A couple of Israeli scientists. They have something my employer wants."

"Which would be?"

"A formula. Apparently they stumbled across a potent drug that is worth a lot of money."

"Corporate espionage is more Zanetakos' thing."

Justin shrugged. "She's laying low for a while."

"In prison."

"You didn't hear? She got out. Slipped out on a work furlough or something like that. Say what you want to about her, but she's smart."

Liz rolled her eyes. Clever, maybe, and Zanetakos knew how to use what she had to get what she wanted. Liz didn't see how that set her apart from any other if Bud's graduates.

"You've been the talk, you know," Justin said as he moved to a small table where he had laid out his tools. "Undercover for over four years now, right?" He was watching her as he spoke and Liz couldn't help but wonder if he was there, at least in part, to check in on her. She wouldn't be surprised if her stunt with Gina had gotten back to Bud somehow. It wasn't that anything about her past assignments would lend to going off the reservation for personal reasons, but four years was a long time for deep cover, and even the Major must have known that.

Liz shrugged casually. "It's the job. Four years or four months, it doesn't matter. This one just happens to be the long game."

That seemed to catch Justin's attention. "I've heard a rumour that your real mark is Raymond Reddington."

She glanced over to see that the scientists were more out than in, but lowered her voice anyway. "A rumour or you were told?"

"Can you blame him, Masha?" he asked, all but admitting that part of his goal was to check in on her. "There's a lot riding on this one. If Reddington finds out but isn't eliminated…"

"I'm aware what could happen," she snapped.

"Just between you and me, because we're old friends-"

"You and I are _not_ friends."

He snorted. "Gina thinks you're soft on Phelps."

"Is that what she told Bud?"

"I don't know the details of what she told McCready, but I'm here, aren't I?"

"You can tell McCready that he knows me. I'll get the job done. As soon as I have what I need about Reddington, Berlin will have it."

"Berlin won't let the task force live." Justin sighed, shooting Liz a look from the corner of his eye. "Berlin contacted McCready. He couldn't reach you."

"Things have been dicey lately. Going dark doesn't mean the job's not being done."

"Berlin seems to think something is wrong. He has a meet set with this woman to go over the final details before bringing you in."

Justin handed her a photo of an auburn haired woman with pale skin and green eyes. "Who is she?"

"She's going by the name Jolene Parker." His gaze lingered on her. "Smile, Masha. Things are wrapping up. This is always the exciting time of an op. Well, you're kind anyway. Mine are exciting all the way through." One of the scientists made a small sound and a wicked sort of grin spread across his features. "The meet isn't for another few hours. Let's see if you're still as good as I remember from school."

Liz offered a smile that would fool him, but inside she felt sick. Berlin would recall her and Jacob might get caught in the crosshairs. Nothing about this left her comfortable.

* * *

There were relatively few places that Raymond Reddington was uncomfortable in. He could have drinks with royalty one evening and sleep in a cave the next. That was part of what made him so successful: he wasn't tied down like most. That was why he felt even more irritable wasting his time in this forsaken hellhole then the other fifty or more people packed in around him waiting.

Of all the places on earth, Reddington hated the DMV most.

He glanced over to see Glen waving him over impatiently and Red huffed in frustration as he pulled himself from the stiff chair. "Please tell me I haven't been waiting for an hour for nothing," he groused as he shut the office door behind him. "You are aware that your snack machine is broken? Do you people _enjoy_ making others suffer?"

Glen plopped down in his chair. "Sure, I work at the DMV for kicks," he grumbled.

"Did you find the location?" Reddington asked, feeling the other man already managing to get under his skin. It was amazing how quickly it happened.

"You know I don't have all day to-"

"I'm on a very tight schedule and you've already wasted an hour. I swear to you if you've-"

Glen snorted, that impish smile of his curling his lips as he pushed a piece of paper towards him. "Lease is under the name Rebecca Halls, but I have video surveillance of the same girl in the photo." He paused, the joking finally put aside. "It's Masha Rostova."

Reddington nodded slowly, standing. "Do you have access to the feeds still?"

"I can pull them up, but it'll take a while."

The taller man shook his head. "That won't be necessary. Was there a young man with her?"

"Yeah, and he pulled up all sorts of aliases."

"I imagine that he did. Thank you. That's exactly what I needed." Red didn't wait for Glen to stop him, but strode out of the DMV with renewed purpose. Dembe was waiting on him by the car. "We have that lovely Mossad agent that is working with the task force on file, don't we?"

"Her number is in the phone," Dembe answered and promptly handed the burner to him.

Reddington nodded. "Thank you," he said as he chose the name from this list and it began to ring.

" _Navabi_ ,"

A smile perked his lips. "Agent Navabi, you may not know me, but my name is Raymond Reddington, and I hear you're looking for Justin Masterson. I believe we may be able to help each other."

* * *

Elizabeth Phelps stood on the corner where she had been told to meet Berlin's operative, finger working at the empty space where her wedding rings usually rested. She had taken everything with her besides that, but she had taken the rings off and set them on the table when Justin had needed help holding one of the scientists down. Now her finger felt bare without it.

"Liz?"

She turned, finding the redhead from the photo smiling at her. She plastered one of her own across her lips. "Jolene."

"I thought that was you. How have you been?"

They were out in the open, and to anyone that passed by them they looked like two women catching up. "Pretty good. Getting things put together," Liz answered. "Not quite there yet though."

"I'm sure you'll have everything together in time." She grinned widely. "Hey, I'm staying just around the corner. Why don't we get caught up? You have time, right?"

Liz didn't let her smile fade. "All the time in the world."

She followed Jolene Parker around the corner and down a couple of blocks to an apartment building, before following her up to the top floor. She watched carefully, noticing the distinct lack of security cameras around the place. She risked a glance at Jolene's still smiling face as the other woman held the door open for her.

"You can relax," Jolene said as soon as the door was closed, her voice dropping and going flat. "I wasn't sent to kill you, but Berlin is having doubts."

"Berlin doesn't know anything," Liz snapped. "I've been undercover on this assignment for four years and he's been all but silent."

"You missed a check in."

"So what? I'm an undercover operative. If I risked my entire assignment for one check in-"

"You need to settle down. You're coming to the end of it. He wants everything you have on the team Reddington's put together. Names, photos, responsibilities, family. You know the drill. Anything useful."

"Berlin is after Reddington, not his puppets."

"And what's the easiest way to get to them? You married one of them, right? Are you telling me you don't host dinners or anything?" she asked slyly. "No pillow talk about work?"

Liz felt her jaw tighten a bit. "I need time to put it together."

"He needs it within twenty-four hours. He'll be stateside and-"

"Berlin is coming here? Why wasn't I told?"

"Maybe you should check in more often." Liz bristled irritably and Jolene smiled. "Let's start with the one you married. What can you tell me about him?"

"He's an FBI agent, well trained, devoted to his work." She watched the other woman carefully and forced the words out of her mouth. "Reddington chose him specifically for the task force."

That caught her attention and she leaned forward. "Why?"

"He doesn't know."

"Or he won't tell you."

"Jacob trusts me."

"Does he?" Jolene asked with a sly smile. She turned, moving across the room. "Berlin thinks you've been under too long. He's got something new planned. I need everything you have and then you're going to break your husband's heart. Tell him you're leaving. Tell him you've met someone else. You're one of the Major's aren't you? Leave him shattered, and it'll give me the in to pick up where you left off."

Liz stared for a moment. "He's recalling me now?"

"As soon as you wrap things up, yes. I'll be taking over from here."

"Why?"

"Honestly? Berlin doesn't think you'll be able to kill him in the end and he doesn't like loose ends. It's fine. You'll still get paid."

Liz watched her carefully as she spoke and her feet were moving almost before she gave them permission. Berlin had no way to know that Jolene had made contact. She could spin it by saying that she waited and waited and the woman never showed. If she didn't, Jacob could get hurt in the middle of all of this. She wasn't willing to give her life with him up yet.

Jolene turned, mouth opens to speak, but Liz landed a hard blow to her nose, sending her stumbling back. The dark haired woman didn't wait, but caught her still stumbling, taking her feet out from under her. She had her on the ground in an instant, her hands around her throat. The penned woman kicked up, catching Liz in the ribs with her knee and nearly knocking her off, but she held on tight and slammed her hard enough against the floor that she must have seen stars.

Liz was breathing hard by the time Jolene finally went still. She sat there for a moment on the floor of the apartment shaking, and she wasn't sure if it was her body trying to pull in enough oxygen or simply the understanding sinking in. She had killed one of her boss' operatives. Technically she had gone rogue. Now she just had to clean up the mess before they could link it back to her.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she jumped a little, pulling it out and seeing a blocked number. It was likely Justin, calling to make sure the meet went well. She slid it open and a voice that she was not expecting came through. " _Elizabeth, you need to get as far away from your safe house as you can_ ," Raymond Reddington said firmly.

"Excuse me?" she demanded, a little taken back by the sudden order from the man that she'd been tasked to gather information on.

" _Your husband's task force will be on their way shortly to arrest your friend Justin Masterson for the kidnapping and likely torture of two Israeli scientists. You need to be as far away from the situation as possible_."

"Why are you warning me?"

" _While I'm sure that Agent Phelps will dig at it until he comes across the unhappy truth of who you are, I see no point in things coming to light with the entire task force coming down on you_."

He had said before that he was trying to protect her. She had no idea what that could mean. He'd focused in on Jacob, so maybe he was helping her for his sake. Why he suddenly had a fondness for her husband after nearly killing him just a few years before, Liz couldn't possibly understand, but he seemed to. Maybe she could use that to her advantage. "You're protecting me to protect Jacob, right?" she asked, but didn't wait for an answer to continue. "I need your help, Reddington. I just killed a woman that was going to hurt Jacob. A woman that was supposed to take my place in the… situation I'm in."

" _You've betrayed Berlin_?" he murmured softly. " _For him_."

"Yes. You were right. I do love my husband. I'm willing to do anything to protect him, but I need a clean up crew."

" _I know just who to call,_ " Reddington answered. " _Text me the address where you'll at and I'll send Mr Kaplan right away_."

Liz pulled in an unsteady breath. "Reddington? Please… I need to know. Why Jacob? After everything?"

She heard the older man chuckle on the other end of the line. "Oh Lizzie, this has never been about Jacob Phelps. Send the address. Mr Kaplan will be there shortly." The line went dead in her ear and Liz stood there frozen in place, the name that she'd only allowed Jacob to call her in so very long having left the man's lips so casually, so familiarly, that it chilled her to her core.

* * *

"I still don't understand why he'd call you out of the blue," Jacob pressed, pulling the bulletproof vest over his head and tightening it around his middle. "You shouldn't even know he's connected to this team."

Samar Navabi shrugged. "He called and told me that he could deliver Justin Masterson along with our two scientists if I gave my word that we'd call off the hunt for Masha Rostova. As long as the intel pans out, it's an exchange I'll happily make. Rostova was never the target."

"For you."

"Easy, Jake, there'll be time," Ressler said as he joined them, Meera at his side.

They were standing just a block away from the location that Reddington had provided to the Mossad agent and it left Jacob seething. Rostova was his link. "The whole reason we're helping you is to take Rostova in for questioning," he snapped.

"The whole reason we're helping her is to save two people's lives," Ressler corrected. "Rostova was a bonus. Now she's not. We'll get to the bottom of it, Jake. You just have to be patient."

He snorted and turned his attention to the mission. "What do we have?"

"Aram said there are cameras situated on the southeast corner as well as the northwest," Meera said as she pointed. "There may be others set up that aren't aware of, but if there are, they're not provided by the city."

"When we go in, we go in hot," Ressler agreed. "We don't have time to get caught."

Navabi nodded. "He'll kill the hostages. If we want them alive, we take out Masterson first."

"Jake or Meera, which one of you wants to take the sniper position?"

Meera shot Jacob a grin. "I'm not sure Phelps could sit still for it. He's a bit antsy."

"Sounds like you just volunteered. That does not give you permission to take a shot at me, got it?" he answered, finally giving her a smirk of his own.

She looked entirely pleased at having pulled it out of him. "No promises. See you after it's cleared."

Jacob would have preferred Meera go in with them rather than Navabi, but apparently he wasn't getting a say in anything that day. Ressler shot him a look as if he knew what his partner was saying and shut it down before he opened his mouth. The younger man pulled in a deep breath, unholstered his gun, and they moved quietly to the one place that they hoped would have a blindspot.

The door went down with a loud crash that resonated out into the street. Gunshots immediately followed, but Masterson didn't have a chance and he must have known it. He surrendered his weapon almost immediately when he saw them coming through, hands raised, and Ressler moved to make the arrest.

"They're here!" Navabi called, relief sounding in her voice.

Jacob's gaze swept the warehouse as their people continued to clear it. The place looked bigger than the others, with a door leading out to what might have been a patio area if someone were living here. An open space was left in the middle with a straight path out to the garage opening, as if a car had been parked there, and piled next to the opening was a sheet that might have been used to cover it. The car itself was missing. He moved through the room, blue eyes looking for any tiny detail. This was Rostova's place. If he were careful he might find something that kept this from behing a complete waste. Guns, computers that would need Aram to get into them, and a security system that showed all the corners of the building. Jacob squatted down, pulling the trash bin out to search through it.

"Jake?" The dark haired agent looked over to his partner who had a file in his hand and a strange look plastered across his face. "You need to see this before they file it into evidence."

He straightened and moved over, carefully taking the folder and opening it, seeing his own face as he did so. The folder was filled with photos of him, of Reddington, of Ressler and Meera and even Cooper. Their entire team was under surveillance. "She's watching us," he breathed, feeling a little sick. "Ress, if this isn't enough to-"

"You're right," Ressler said firmly. "We're going to pursue this. I don't care what Reddington says. Cooper will back us."

Jacob nodded, his motions stiff as he handed the file back over to the FBI agents bagging the evidence. "I want copies of those on my desk before they're filed, got it?" He turned, ready to go back to his trash bin, but his gaze was caught by something sitting on the table. It was small, catching the light as it gleamed, and as he stepped closer he saw they were rings. Wedding rings. He snatched them up, cursing himself for a moment that he'd forgotten the gloves that they always fussed at him about, but the thought instantly left him as he got a better look at the jewelry, his eyes finally focusing through his contacts and his breath caught down in his chest, refusing to push up through his throat to be released.

"This is a mess," Ressler grumbled from behind him, catching his attention and Jacob turned, seamlessly pocketing the rings.

"Yeah," he managed.

"You okay?"

The younger man drew a shaky breath and offered a tight smile. "Just like you said, a mess. The sooner we know what this woman wants from us, the better."

"My gut instinct? She's tracking down Reddington. My guess is he's tracking her in return," Ressler said thoughtfully. "Guess we'll know more when all this gets logged."

Jacob nodded. "It'll take them a while to do that. I'm going to go let Hudson out so he doesn't make me regret leaving him so long all over that rug that Liz loves. I'll meet you back at the Post Office."

Ressler chuckled. "Yeah, she might kill you if she came home to dog pee all over that rug."

"She just might," Jacob murmured and started for the exit, pulling his cell from his pocket as he did and dialing a familiar number. "Hey, Brandy, it's Jacob. Do you have any idea when Liz is supposed to be back from that trip she took for the university?"

" _Trip_?" the psychology department's secretary asked from the other end. " _She didn't go on a trip._ "

"Yeah, for Candice."

" _No, sorry. She called in sick this morning._ "

Jacob closed his eyes, feeling his chest tighten. "Thanks Brandy."

" _Is everything okay_?"

"Yeah, I just must have misunderstood her. I was out early this morning. Appreciate it." He ended the call and loosed a trembling breath, his fingers closing around the rings he'd slipped on his wife's hand on their wedding day.

* * *

Mr Kaplan was not what Liz had expected. The woman was tall and brisk in her manner. Efficient. She refused to give her any further details about what Reddington had said on the phone, but she helped Liz clean up the mess that was Jolene Parker and put the apartment back as if she'd never been there before. After breaking and dropping the burner she'd used to communicate with Justin into a trash bin miles from her own home, she ditched her car and caught the train to a nearby station, walking the rest of the way with her mind spinning.

Hudson met her at the front door, barking happily at the sight of her and she knelt down to scratch him between the ears. "I missed you too, sweetie," she told the dog, but he took off towards the living room. Liz blinked, following him, and found her husband sitting in one of the chairs, his gaze distant. "Hey, babe. You're home early."

"So are you."

"Well, it was just a quick talk, thankfully. The way they made it sound I thought I might be gone a week," she laughed, forcing a smile to her lips as she crossed the space between them. "I'm not complaining though." She bent down and kissed him, but paused when he didn't return it. "Jacob? You okay?" She pulled back just enough to see his eyes, much darker than usual, and his entire expression was tight.

Jacob swallowed hard. "I need to ask you something, and I need you to answer me honestly. Can you do that?"

"Sure. Of course," she answered, a knot forming up in her chest. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

At first she thought that he was reaching for her hand, but instead of taking it, he latched onto her wrist as he stood, his expression cold. "When were you going to tell me?"

She stared at him. "Tell you what? Jacob, I'm not sure what you're getting at."

"When were you going to tell me that your real name is Masha Rostova?"

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, I made an offer over on Tumblr to see if anyone wanted this today since it could be several days before I update, just depending on some things, and they said yes, so here you are! It's quite a cliffhanger, but I'd love to hear your thoughts! You guys are so amazing with leaving reviews :D

Next time - Liz's secret is out and when she makes a run for it, Reddington has to scramble to do damage control and save Liz from the man that hired her. Jacob has to make some tough decisions.

 


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Liz stared at him for a long moment, her wrist in his vice-like grip. "Jacob, what are you-"

He released her, digging in his pocket, and she could tell that he was just barely containing the boiling anger that was rolling through him. He ripped his hand back out and opened it to show her rings resting in his palm. He'd been at her safehouse. He knew. There was no denying it. "Missing something?" he growled.

"Jacob, I can-"

"Explain? Really? Because I'm thinking that you had four years to explain, Liz. What the hell is this? We bust a guy at a terrorist's safe house-"

"I'm not a terrorist, Jacob," she tried to argue, but it was almost like he didn't hear her.

"- and I find out that you've been there. You're not on a trip, you were helping a man kidnap two foreign scientists to… what, Liz?" He stopped, and she could see him shaking. "Masha Rostova. I've been hunting you down to find out how you connected Reddington to me and now I know. What was I to you? A mark? A job? You had my team and me under _surveillance_. You asked me for details about my job and made me feel like I was lying to you if I didn't give them. I _trusted_ you."

"It's not what you think."

"Then what is it?" he yelled and she stepped back from him, glancing back to see if she had a clear line for the door. She could run. She could call in and escape, but if she did that, she could never come back.

"Fine," he growled, pulling his cell from his pocket.

"What are you doing?"

"Calling it in."

"You can't. Jacob, please, you know me. I'm not a terrorist. Babe, please," she begged and reached out, but he ripped his hand away.

"I don't know who you are. I thought I did, but the woman I love would _never_ do this to me. She _knows_ that I can't… that I'm not….." His voice hitched and she could see the cracks in his mask of anger, and what she saw through those cracks scared her even more. They closed almost as quickly as they had formed and he gained control of himself. "You're not going to talk your way out of this."

The phone was already ringing and Liz snapped it away from him. He made a lunge for it and she shoved off, a firm kick sending him stumbling back into the chair. He was up in a half a second and Liz sent the phone crashing down, stomping on it hard enough to break it and hit the floor, her leg sweeping out, meant to take her husband off his feet, but he jumped up and she missed, having to roll to stay free. She'd always known he was good, but she had never fought him before. There had never been a reason to, and she had hoped against all hope that there never would be. If she was leaving, he'd have to be unable to follow in some way.

Liz struck out, fist connecting hard against his ribs and another to his jaw before he dodged the two blows following and she finally landed a hard kick to his knee. He was holding back, his expression torn and angry, but he rolled out of the way of her next attack and to his feet. She had to throw herself off to the side as he sent a chair sliding towards her, meant to take her off her feet and he was around it in a half a second, pinning her to the floor. She slammed her head forward, catching him by surprise, and Jacob sat back, dazed.

She stood, towering over him, and the pain that lined his features was so real that it took the fight out of her. Hadn't she just killed a woman to protect him earlier that day? She loved him. More than anything. Carefully Liz knelt next to him, watching him carefully as he tried to regain his bearings. She leaned in, her hand going to the back of his neck as it always did as she kissed him and she tasted salt. She just wasn't sure if it was from his tears or her own.

They parted after a moment and she lingered there. "I'm sorry," Liz whispered huskily. "I know you don't believe me right now, but what I'm about to do… it's for you." She needed time. She could save him if she just had time. "Trust Reddington."

That seemed to catch his attention and he looked up at her, blue eyes wide and questioning. She didn't wait to allow herself to change her mind, but stood and in one swift motion he was out on their living room floor. Tears streamed down her face and she wiped them away. She had to protect him, and she couldn't do that from inside a jail cell.

* * *

The living room swam slowly back into focus and Jacob groaned as he came to consciousness. Everything hurt and his head felt like someone had repeatedly slammed him up against a wall. He blinked hard, trying to clear his vision, and struggled to sit up.

"I wouldn't do that too quickly."

Jacob made the mistake of whipping his head around and he saw stars, nearly blacking back out. He sat very still for a moment, eyes closed and arms locked around bent knees to keep him upright. Several deep breaths later he finally let his eyes flutter open and slowly turned to see Raymond Reddington sitting patiently on his couch. Jacob did his best to glare. "Are we talking again?"

Reddington frowned. "Don't be petty, Agent Phelps. I'm a practical man and you have information I need. Take your time."

Hudson whined as he trotted over, pushing his way between Jacob's arm and his body so that the dog was halfway in his lap. Jacob sighed as he let him and turned towards the man he hated most. _Trust Reddington_ , Liz had said, but Liz had also left him unconscious on the floor of their home. And lied to him. Countless times. Jacob hadn't realized that something could hurt that deeply. He didn't think anything ever had before.

"She could have killed you, but she chose not to."

"Is she working for you?" Jacob managed, his voice raw and trembling. He needed answers. At this point, he thought he deserved at least a few.

Apparently Reddington agreed. "No. She works for a man known as the Major and has been lent out to an enemy of mine that calls himself Berlin. Elizabeth is in a very precarious place right now, Agent Phelps."

"Masha," Jacob bit out. "Her name is Masha Rostova."

Reddington's expression grew a little distant. "She's always been Lizzie to me," he answered softly.

Slowly Jacob eased Hudson away and tried his luck at standing. His knee wobbled a bit under him, but he was steadier than he thought he would be. Carefully he moved to the remaining chair and sank down into it so that he could look at Reddington while speaking to him. "I know you don't like me after the whole Garrick thing, and I've never liked you, but you and I need to put that aside for a minute. I need answers, Reddington. Not having them, being used as your puppet, that's led us here."

Reddington sighed. "I had hoped, perhaps, that you were simply an assignment that she had spent too long in. She had a fondness for you, that much was obvious, but today… Today she made a decision that _will_ be discovered, and when it is she will be in more danger than I anticipated." He folded his hands and leaned forward. "I suppose, before we go any further I need to know that you still care for her."

Jacob blinked hard. He had always had a difficult time sorting through his own emotions quickly. It took time for him to put a finger on something another person might know instantly. It wasn't that he didn't feel, but his own emotions were quieter, muted. They had to be or he would have been overwhelmed in the life he'd lived as a child. This one, though, he didn't want to feel. It was wrong. She had betrayed him in the deepest possible way and he felt… He felt like he was slipping under the water's surface with someone's hands around his throat, forcing him under. There was no good answer, because any normal person would have said no. He didn't know this woman, so how could he care for her? She wore Liz's face, her smile, spoke with her voice and laughed with her laugh, but the lies were crashing over him and he only knew one truth in that moment as he drowned beneath it all. "Yes," he managed, his voice barely a whisper.

Reddington nodded after a long moment. "I've been looking for Elizabeth a long time. There are many things that I don't know about what happened to her that led her to Bill McCready's school, but at four she was in a bad fire. It destroyed the house."

"She still has nightmares," Jacob murmured. "She would wake screaming from them."

"She disappeared that night. I've been looking for her since."

"Are you her dad or something?" Wouldn't that be a twist? Raymond Reddington for a father-in-law. The thought made Jacob slightly nauseous.

"I knew her mother," he answered evasively. "Katarina and I were… close."

"The Russian spy?"

Reddington nodded. "I employ one of the best trackers there is. Given time, he can find anyone. The man is…infuriating, but many years after I set him on it, he found a woman going by the name Elizabeth Scott that was dating one of the men hunting me down. Life is a funny little thing, isn't it?"

"So that's when you tried to have me killed?"

The older man snorted. "What do you really know about that situation? You would shot by Max Bouchard, a man that had briefly been in my employ. When we crossed paths in Vienna, Max had just switched sides and was working for Berlin."

Jacob stared for a long moment, the information sinking in. "You didn't have me shot?"

"I did not. That's not to say I wouldn't have, mind you. You were as persistent as your partner was in that chase." He leaned back, Hudson putting his head in his knee and Reddington scratched the dog between the ears. "Elizabeth is in danger, Jacob. She needs help to get out of it. How far are you willing to go to save your wife?"

"As far as it takes," Jacob answered. "Do you know where she is?"

"No, but McCready will."

"And he's just going to tell you?"

"For a price that man can be persuaded into quite a bit. That, and he's gone to quite a few lengths to keep it from me that he lent operatives out to a man bent on killing me."

"You can set the meet?" Jacob asked as he stood, limping over to the rarely used house phone.

"Yes. Who are you calling?"

"Ressler."

Reddington snorted. "Donald will hardly see this as-"

"He's my partner and my friend. After Garrick… I promised not to keep things from him."

Reddington snorted. "After we meet with Bill. We may need your team as backup anyway."

Jacob nodded. That was a compromise he could make. Slowly, he set the phone down and turned to look at his one-time enemy. "You said that she made some sort of decision today. What did you mean?"

The older man hummed softly to himself. "A woman who was in Berlin's employ approached Elizabeth today. Your wife was being recalled. Apparently this Jolene Parker woman was to be her replacement."

"What sort of replacement?"

"Elizabeth didn't say a great deal about it, but I certainly got the impression that the woman thought that she would be able to seduce you and do a better job of gathering intel than Elizabeth did."

"What happened?"

"Lizzie broke her neck. Apparently she had plans to hurt you." He stood, giving Hudson one last scratch before turning his gaze on Jacob. "We need to go if we're going to help her."

Jacob nodded slowly. He couldn't take the time to process everything yet. It would take days, and that was just the information that he had. In all likelihood, there was a lot more to come. For now, all he could do was act on what he knew. Liz was a spy and she had lied to him. She was in trouble, but he didn't think he was capable of simply letting her go.

* * *

"Does your partner make a habit of disappearing often?"

Ressler turned from where he was looking at the photos found at Rostova's safe house that were taped up to the board. There had been more than the first file they had found. Notes and photos and things that the woman should have no way of knowing. She must have managed to either tap phones or possibly even bug someone's home. Ressler had been about ready to put in a request to have a sweep conducted of each of the main team's residences when Samar had startled him out of his thoughts. "Say what?"

"Phelps. He was supposed to come back, wasn't he?"

"Liz might have been home when he got there or something. He'll let us know."

Samar tilted her head in question. "Liz?"

"His wife."

"He doesn't strike me as the married type."

Ressler snorted. "Pretty sure he wouldn't have been for anyone but Liz." He turned his attention back to the board. "She's good for him. You should have seen him before he met her. She helped balance him."

Samar hummed softly. "My team is taking Masterson in. They've said that they will relay any information that they receive about Rostova, but I wouldn't imagine there would be a lot."

"You heading back to Israel then?"

"Not just yet. I just spoke to Cooper. He extended an offer."

"Offer?" Ressler echoed.

"To work with the task force."

Well that was something he hadn't heard. They could use the extra hand, and she had proven to work well with them. "What'd you say?"

"I'm thinking about it," she answered softly.

"Well, we'd be happy to have you on board."

Samar nodded, a small smile tipping her lips.

"And don't worry about Jake. He just takes a while to warm up to people."

"He's a bit odd."

"Understatement," Ressler chuckled. "Look, I think we're going to have to wait until everything else comes in to get anything else from the scene. I have a dinner date that I can't break tonight."

"Is this the one?" Meera asked as she passed by.

"Yeah. Got the ring and everything."

"Same one as the last time you proposed?"

Ressler snorted. "You're so funny. See you two tomorrow. Call me if you need me." He started for the lift and pulled his cell from his pocket, hand touching the ring box as he did. A smile tugged his lips as he stepped in and hit the speed dial.

His partner's phone went straight to voicemail. "I'm guessing Liz was home when you got there and you got distracted. Nothing new yet on the case, so I'm heading out. Wish me luck," he said and ended the call.

Looking at the time, Jake was likely halfway into making dinner if Liz had come home. He needed the chance to unwind. They all did after that day.

* * *

Jacob had never flown on a private plane before, but Reddington insisted that it was the quickest way to the meet that he had set up with the man known as the Major. The older man had left him well enough alone once they had boarded and Jacob settled himself into one of the plush leather seats and found himself toying with his wedding ring, gaze fixed on it until a glass of scotch appeared in front of him and he looked up to see Reddington holding it. "I still haven't entirely forgiven you, but we will need to work together for this."

Jacob nodded and accepted the drink. "What should I know going in?"

"First of all you are _not_ here as a federal agent, do you understand? All those character traits you spend so much time hiding from the FBI? Those are your best assets around this crowd. In a slightly different set of circumstances, you would have been exactly what Bill would have looked for in a student."

Jacob nodded slowly, feeling the change in air pressure signalling their descent. "So you think you can buy the information from him? What happens to Liz once we get her back?"

Reddington watched him. "To a great extent, that will be up to Elizabeth. I won't let your people lock her away though."

"If you take off with her she'll have to run. They'll chase her."

"And you?"

Jacob pressed his lips together thoughtfully. "I don't know."

"I suggest you have that figured out at some point."

"What if she wants to stay? It's not like you can buy off the FBI."

"Can't I?" he chuckled. "The FBI simply deals in information rather than dollars, but I assure you, Agent Phelps, they _can_ be bought."

Jacob knocked back the rest of his drink and turned to look at him. "How did you know she'd gone?" he asked carefully, not sure he wanted the answer.

"I've had people watching your home since you moved in."

Well that was unnerving. "Cameras? What? In our home?"

"Of course not. I wouldn't disrupt Elizabeth's privacy like that."

"But mine would be totally okay?"

Reddington shrugged. "Mrs Birch across the street makes the best apple pie I've tasted in years. I do enjoy our visits whenever she gives her reports. She saw Elizabeth storm out with her go-bag and looking like she'd been through a fight. She called immediately."

The plane dipped down for their final approach, and Reddington went silent. Once the wheels touched down and they had stopped, the Concierge of Crime stood and Jacob followed silently with Dembe with them.

There was a man waiting for them in the tarmac. He was older, his white hair thinning but not gone, and his blue eyes were clear and sharp. His lips were tugged downward in a small frown and he had people standing around him. Bodyguards, Jacob wagered, and he recognized one of them.

"Hello again, handsome," Gina Zanetakos purred as Reddington and Jacob moved down the stairs.

"You brought a fed, Reddington?" McCready demanded and Red held his hands out in a lazy sort of shrug.

"And you've sided with Berlin," Reddington stated evenly. "Surprises all around. Jacob isn't here as an agent, Bill. We're here for Miss Rostova."

"She's on assignment." McCready's gaze drifted over the the gash that Jacob sported along his temple from his wife's and his earlier fight. "No contact until she's done."

"Funny, because Justin Masterson didn't seem to get that memo," Reddington muttered flippantly.

"You'll have to wait until she's done, Red."

"You mean until she's killed me."

"I'm not at liberty to talk about my operatives assignments. If that's all you wanted..." He started to turn, moving towards the car parked a couple hundred yards away.

"I will double whatever Berlin is paying you _and_ offer my full protection for any kickback he might try to give."

That caused the Major to turn back around. "I'm listening."

"You chose poorly in the side you picked. I'm willing to let that slide, Bill. We've worked together well before. I would like the buy out Miss Rostova's contract for an indefinite period of time. I have quite a bit she can do for me after seeing her work."

McCready chuckled. "That it?"

"Oh no. I'd like her entire file as well, though I'm willing to pay a bit more for that. I need to know everything about her."

"This have something to do with the husband?" McCready asked, nodding towards Jacob. "Missing the missus already? Looks like Masha got you all turned around, didn't she? She's good at that. She'll have you ready to hand her the world if she wants you to, but it ain't real."

Jacob didn't flinch, but tilted his head a little to the side. The two men held each other's gazes for a long while before McCready finally chuckled. "Alright then, we'll talk, Red, but I ain't risking one of my boys to pull her out. If Berlin smells trouble he'll kill her and them both. You got someone?"

"That depends. How much does Berlin know about the team that Miss Rostova was watching?"

"Nothing, as far as I'm aware. He was waiting on her report. Sent someone in to get it, too, but I ain't heard how that went down."

"Oh, she's quite dead," Reddington said cheerfully. "Apparently she threatened the wrong person. Protective isn't a trait that I would have expected out of one of yours."

McCready's expression evened out and his frown returned. "Neither would I."

"Well, if Miss Parker was supposed to deliver that information, I'd say it's a safe bet that Berlin does not have it yet. Agent Phelps, I seem to remember you being quite talented in undercover work?"

So _that's_ why Reddington had been so willing to bring him along. "I've done my fair share," he answered noncommittally.

"This kid? He can't pass for one of mine. Look at him," McCready scoffed, waving in Jacob's direction. "FBI training doesn't leave any room for creative thinking. My operatives are the best, Red. You know that. Even if he could get in the door, he'd never hold it down. Zanetakos just about killed him last time."

"I learn from my mistakes," Jacob answered, his voice steady and his expression impossible for anyone to read. He felt the woman in question's gaze on him and he took a step forward. "I know you pick kids up off the street and from the foster system. You go after kids with sociopathic tendencies that you can mold, raising them to be whatever the hell you want them to be."

"You expect me to apologize for my business?"

"No. I get it. Hell, if you'd picked me up before my adopted parents did, I would have taken that. Living on the streets makes you desperate and that's what you're after." He had gotten closer and closer to the Major and one of his operatives stepped up to him, ready to pull him back a few steps. Jacob didn't hesitate as he threw an elbow, slamming it hard into the man's nose and sending him stumbling back. He ducked under a blow thrown by Zanetakos and used the momentum to bob around, landing a hard kick to her middle and sending her tumbling to the side. Her partner was up, blood streaming down his face, and Jacob offered him a smirk. He needed the stress relief.

Reddington and McCready stood back and watched as Jacob went back and forth with the two operatives, reading their movements and adjusting for them. He took a couple of hard blows himself, but by the end of it he came out on top, McCready calling them off before he did any serious damage to them. Reddington chuckled. "He could have been one of yours."

"Certainly moves like it. What'd you say your name was, kid?"

"Phelps. Jacob."

"Sounds familiar." He shrugged it off. "I'll get you Rostova's records. How soon you need them?"

"Now."

"I can have it then in an hour. What do you want to know specifically?"

"How you found her. Where you picked her up from. Anything pertaining to that."

"Anderson, make yourself useful and get what Reddington needs," McCready grumbled at the young operative Jacob had beaten down. He turned back to Red. "She was young when I ran across her. Too young for the program. I think she might have been ten or eleven. The kid didn't even know her own name. Foster care had given her Elizabeth Scott. I dug around and when I figured out who she was I wasn't going to let that go. I held onto her for a bit, let her watch the other kids. She picked up on things. By the time she went through the actual courses, no one could keep up. She's my best student."

"But?"

McCready chuckled. "But always just a little too emotional," he said and glanced over to Jacob. "I thought she'd gotten control of them. Guess not. You don't really want an operative like that, do you, Reddington?"

"Masha Rostova is exactly what I want. Now, let's talk about Berlin and getting her out."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Happy New Year! I had hoped and planned to get this up before too late this evening and here it is. I hope everyone has a safe and happy new year's eve. If you haven't been checking them out, feel free to pop over to my tumblr account ( takadasaiko [dot] tumblr [dot] com ) and see the gif previews that I've been putting up. They've been a great deal of fun.

Next time - Jacob tells Ressler what happened, Reddington pulls strings to get things done, and there was more to her extraction than Liz knew.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Jacob stood in his living room, surrounded by pieces of a life that he wasn't entirely sure he believed. Somehow his mind had conjured up more damage to their home than the fight had actually dealt. He could imagine things in pieces, furniture overturned, and breakables shattered, but in reality there were just a few things out of place and a chair that would need some work. It didn't seem fair. It should have been a wreck. It _felt_ like a wreck.

Hudson perked from his place moping at Jacob's feet and the doorbell rang. Jacob pulled a breath in and moved towards the door, seeing Ressler standing on the porch. By the time he had gotten home in the earliest hours of the morning he had had three messages from his partner on the house phone and he assumed there were probably a few floating around in his cell phone's voicemail too. "Hey," he greeted dully as he let him in.

"Redecorating?" Ressler asked, his gaze sweeping over the living room.

Jacob snorted and moved to set the chair upright. It tilted precariously, one leg unsteady beneath it.

"I've been trying to get ahold of you since last night when you never showed back up at the office. I was starting to get worried. What happened?"

"Liz is gone," the younger man managed, his voice tight in effort to at least keep it even.

Ressler stared at him for a long moment. "What happened, Jake?"

Jacob dug into his pocket, feeling Liz's wedding rings there. He had held onto them, almost as a reminder that this was real. This wasn't some terrible nightmare and he had to face it. "I told you I wouldn't keep things from you," he murmured.

"Yeah, well, your marriage is kind of private," Ressler acknowledged.

"You were going to propose last night," Jacob managed, the realization hitting him hard.

"Yeah, well, that's not-"

"Did she say yes?"

"Yeah, she did, but Jake… What the hell happened?"

He would have rather have talked about his friend's engagement instead of what was, apparently, his own sham of a marriage, but he had promised Ressler he would be honest with him. "Yesterday at the crime scene…" He clutched at the rings, feeling his control slipping dangerously. "I took something."

Ressler stared at him, confusion evident. "Why?"

"Because I needed answers before the bureau found out," Jacob answered softly and held the rings out for inspection.

"Wedding rings?" Ressler asked.

"They're Liz's."

Ressler's gaze jerked up to meet his. "Why were your wife's rings at Rostova's safe house, Jake?"

It felt like he was sinking again, falling and slipping beneath waves that would drag him under. Jacob closed his eyes and pulled in a breath. "That's exactly what I asked her when she got home yesterday. This happened-" he motioned to the living room- "she knocked me out and was gone by the time I came around."

Ressler was staring at him now and he shifted uncomfortably. "You… You can't be serious."

"Liz is the link. She's the one that Reddington's been using us to find. Red was here when I woke up, I got some answers from him. She's an… She received training from a man known as the Major."

"Same guy that trained Masterson," Ressler acknowledged.

"Reddington and I flew out to New York to meet him. I just got in a couple minutes before you showed up."

Of all the things he had just told him that could have set his partner off, that hadn't been the one Jacob would have pegged. "You did _what_?"

"I needed answers, Ress! I would have called from the plane, but Liz did a number in my phone."

"So you got in a plane with the man that nearly killed you and knows you sold him out to Garrick. Jake-"

"That reminds me. We need to look into something Reddington said. Bouchard, the guy that shot me, was working for a man that calls himself Berlin. It's the same person Liz is working for."

Ressler stared at him. "You're not saying Liz had you shot?" he managed.

"I don't know. There's a lot I don't have answers to." He looked up, his expression determined. "I'm going to find out though. She's been recalled by this Berlin guy. Reddington has already talked to her handler. I'm going to go undercover in and get her out."

"You're… _what_? No, Jake, that's… No. This guy's going to know who you are."

"Reddington said-

"Are you _listening_ to yourself? _Reddington_ said? We have no proof that anything he's saying is true. Why would he be helping you on this anyway? If his connection is to… Liz, then your usefulness to him is done. He could just as easily be setting you up to get yourself killed."

"He needs someone that can go under as one of the Major's operatives without being one."

"And you're the only person that fits?"

"I need to get her back, Ress,"Jacob snapped. "What if it were Audrey, huh? Is there anything that would stop you from protecting her in any way you know how?"

Ressler threw his hands up in the air. "Audrey hasn't been lying to me for four years, Jake!

"I don't know the whole story. Neither do you. We can only get that if we get her out."

"You're way too close. Cooper's never going to clear this."

"I think he will."

The two men stood in silence for several long moments before Jacob took a shaky breath. He trusted Ressler, he reminded himself. Shutting him out did neither of them any good. Carefully he took a step forward and purposefully let the mask of calm he had been struggling to maintain slip away. "I am close. I love her, Ress."

"You love who you thought she was."

"Who she may still be. I won't know if she disappears forever. I can't… She's the only woman I've ever loved. I can't just let go like that doesn't mean anything. I need you to trust me, Ress."

"You're not backing down, are you?" his partner huffed.

"I can't."

The older man shook his head. "Well I'm not going to let you go at it alone, you idiot."

Jacob tried for a smile. "Thanks."

"Just don't expect me to like it," Ressler grumbled and reached out, hand clasping his friend's shoulder. "And don't you dare get yourself killed in all this, you hear me?"

Jacob managed a small nod as he started for the door. He couldn't risk slowing down now. If he did, everything would hit and drag him under. He could rely on Ressler to keep him from going completely over the edge. He might not keep him entirely balanced on this one, but Jacob was pretty sure no one could. He was on the edge of losing what he'd always wanted: his family, but he wouldn't let go without a fight.

* * *

He didn't know what to say to him. Hell, Ressler wasn't sure how to process the situation himself, and it wasn't his wife that was… He wasn't even sure. A terrorist? Maybe. At least the daughter of a spy that had worked for the KGB. She had married Jacob as part of an assignment, but Jake seemed to have at least convinced himself that it could be more than that. Ressler wasn't sure he blamed him for it, necessarily. He knew how rare it was for his friend to find a real and deep connection like he had with Liz, but to find out that the connection could have been false on her end…

Jacob was a damn good liar. Ressler wouldn't be surprised if he were lying to himself to cope. Cooper would see that and he would never let this idiotic plan of Jacob's go through. There were too many risks.

Meera, Aram, and Samar were all standing in the bullpen when Ressler and Jacob exited the lift. All eyes turned to them and Ressler risked a glance to his partner to see his steely expression. Ressler looked over to their teammates, and then up to Cooper's office where their boss looked highly animated inside, Reddington standing in front of his desk.

"Agent Phelps," Aram started and Jacob shook his head.

"If you want to offer anything other information on how we're going to go in, don't."

"Cooper is never going to let you go in," Meera said softly.

"He will."

"You are very close-"

"Aram, do you have the building layout of the location? Reddington should have gotten that for you," Jacob cut off Samar and Ressler motioned for her to back down. Jacob was already hesitant with her. If they had any hope of working together in the future, this was not the time for them to be actively at odds.

"Yes, he did," Aram managed, pulling it up and sending the schematics to the large screens. "We have some active camera views around the location. I'm working on getting access to the feeds, but I don't have those yet."

"We could have a team ready to storm the building here," Jacob said as he pointed.

The door to Cooper's office opened and Ressler tried not to sigh in relief. Jacob might not listen to them, but he would have no choice but to listen to Cooper.

The assistant director had a deep frown etched into his features as he moved down the stairs. "Agent Phelps, I want you wired for this."

"Something small or they'll catch it and it'll get us both killed."

"Sir, with all due respect, you can't be seriously considering sending him in there alone," Meera argued. "We have no confirmation that this Berlin doesn't know his face."

"Do you have an alias that will work?" Cooper directed at Jacob who nodded.

"When presented with the choice to allow Agent Phelps to continue in what he would likely be doing anyway and providing him with back up to do it with or losing the chance to continue saving lives, AD Cooper has made the best choice available to him," Reddington explained.

"You have to be kidding me," Ressler growled. "You're going to get him _killed_. You swore, Reddington-"

"He is the only one I would trust for this, Donald," Reddington said seriously. "Agent Phelps would have been exactly what Bill looked for when he was younger. He holds many of the character traits still and even I can admit his talent in undercover work is difficult to match. He managed to make Ziggy comfortable enough to hand over sensitive client information. Hell, if Bill pitched him to me, I'd likely hire him."

"I really don't know if that's a compliment or not," Jacob grumbled.

"It means you can get this job done," Reddington answered with a shrug. "Getting out of it alive is on you."

"It's happening, Agent Ressler," Cooper said tightly, "and it's on _us_ to get him out alive. Agent Phelps, I told you to find the link and you did. If I had my way I wouldn't send you in on this, but-"

"I want to, sir. No matter what, she's still my wife. I can't get answers if she drops off the map."

Ressler sighed. "I'd like to lead the team closest in, sir."

"I thought you might. We need to move quickly people. Get this sorted out."

"Agent Cooper?" Jacob called, stopping him before he turned. "What's going to happen to Liz?"

Ressler watched Cooper's expression darken considerably. "Reddington has worked out a deal for her should she come willingly."

"This isn't the Liz Phelps we thought we knew," Ressler argued, feeling his partner's gaze on him. "We can't just release her as if-"

"I never said she would be released, Agent Ressler. Let's bring her in first, then we'll worry about what to do with her."

Ressler turned. "Jake-"

"One thing at a time, Ress. Otherwise we're going to get us all killed."

"Just get yourself out of there, okay? I'll have your back, but I need you to let me."

"I know," Jacob murmured, his expression difficult to read. "You're one of the few people I trust to have it."

* * *

She hadn't slept the night before. They had sent a team for her and she had been picked up by a man with beady eyes that seemed to have a sore spot when it came to Reddington. He delivered her to Berlin himself, who had left her waiting until midmorning the next day. On the outside, Liz appeared calm and collected, but inside her thoughts were raging. She couldn't see an out and guards stood by her at all times. It made her feel like a prisoner more than the hired help, and with everything that had happened, that could only end one way.

The door opened, startling her out of her thoughts, and a man strode in. "Elizabeth Scott," he greeted her by the name that Bud had given him upon hire. "Phelps, now, isn't it?"

"You said get close. I got close," she answered evenly.

"That you did." Berlin moved forward, his steps purposeful, almost like he was stalking his prey. It was meant to be unnerving and Liz wouldn't give him the benefit of knowing just how effective it was. She remained still where she sat, entirely aware of her surroundings. He leaned in, his breath nearly making her gag. "But you weren't honest with me, were you, Mrs Phelps?"

"You knew what you needed to from my file. What else is there?"

"So much more," he answered. "Masha. Your handler must have known who you are. Who you are to _him_. Did he think I wouldn't find out?"

"Phelps doesn't matter. He is-"

"Phelps? Reddington."

Liz felt a chill run up her spine. "Reddington?"

Berlin reached out, his hand latching around her throat, applying enough pressure that it made it very difficult to breathe past his hold. "I had my arrival set up, but I had to rearrange things when I found out. I had to come sooner, and I did. I might have gone after someone that he used to care about. The wife, maybe, or the girl, but then there is _you_. Masha Rostova. _Katarina_ 's daughter." His lips curled up at the corners. "That's even better."

"I don't know anything about my mother," Liz said, and it was the truth. She knew the name, she knew a few vague facts, but she'd never followed the trails. As far as Bud had told her, the woman had abandoned her and left her to burn in a house filled with flames. She had scars to prove it. Why would she want to follow the trail of the woman who was to blame for them?

"But Reddington does. Oh, he'll come for you faster than he might have Mrs Reddington or her daughter. He'll rush in here and-"

"I'm nothing to Reddington. I'm the one you hired to find out about him."

"You're _everything_ to him," Berlin snarled and finally released her, the chair she was sitting in tilting back with the force that he did so.

The far door opened again and Berlin straightened, turning to the man who had entered. "Sir, I'm sorry to interrupt, but there is a man here that says he was sent by the Major."

Berlin waved him off. "Kill him. We have what we need."

"If you piss McCready off you won't live to regret it," Liz warned.

"Such a pretty face. I'd hate to ruin it by cutting your tongue out. Quiet."

There was a crash outside the door followed by another. Yells and gunfire were heard and then a yelp of pain before the door burst open and a limp form was thrown in. The man that followed in, looking smug if anything at all, was not the one Liz had expected. It was everything she could do to keep her husband's name from her lips as she stared at him. What the hell was Jacob doing there?

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Berlin growled and Jacob flashed him an easy grin.

"I'm her relief. McCready needs her back for another assignment and he sent me to replace her."

"I asked for his best and he sent her. I don't want you."

Jacob shrugged a little. "You asked for his best and he gave you his second. Sorry. I was busy. Now I'm not." His gaze drifted over to Liz. "Time to go."

"You think you can just march in here, attack my men-"

"He's not dead, and he attacked _me_. He's lucky he's still breathing," Jacob snapped back. "Man, I'm just doing my job. You have a problem with it, call McCready."

Berlin shouted at one of his guards to bring him a phone and Jacob crossed the space between them, standing close enough that Liz could stand and speak quietly with him. "We're not walking out of here. He thinks I have some connection to Reddington."

"That's unfortunate. How many are there?"

"I've seen several move in and out. I don't know how many are on the grounds."

"Your name?" Berlin shouted angrily from across the space.

"Buckley. Matt," Jacob answered without missing a beat and Berlin turned back to his call.

"Tell me you have backup."

"I have back up."

"Then you should probably send for it. We're not walking out of here without a fight." Liz risked a glance up at the man she had married. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't. We'll deal with that once we're out."

"I'm going to jail, aren't I?"

"I have no idea what they have in mind," he answered. "I just know we're both getting out of here alive."

Berlin ended the phone call and looked over to them. "I just spoke to McCready. He doesn't know you."

"Bastard," Jacob hissed and he was already moving when the bullets started flying, shoving Liz hard to the ground.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I hope everyone had a happy and safe New Year this year! Mine consisted of a lot of writing and the Doctor Who Christmas Special lol. Overall, that's really the kind of New Years Eve I like :D

Next time - Reddington gets a few moments to speak to Liz after everything, the feds tear the Phelps household apart looking for evidence, and Jacob finally breaks down.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

Jacob felt the sting of a bullet graze his shoulder as he shoved Liz behind a desk for cover, grabbing for his own weapon as he did. He had hold of her collar, directing her roughly, and they both ducked down.

"Please tell me you have a plan."

"Anytime, Ress," Jacob growled, the comm buzzing obnoxiously in his ear, but other than that he didn't receive a response. He cursed lowly and returned fire. "Where does that door go?" he demanded, motioning to the far wall.

"I don't know. This is the only room they brought me to."

Jacob nodded, running through possible solutions. There were four men and Berlin in the room. He had taken one down just after they had ducked for cover, but it was difficult to get an idea for where they were coming from while they were behind the desk. If he could just-

The thought was caught off as one of those men rounded the corner. Jacob didn't have time to respond as his wife kicked out, a resounding _crack_ coming from the man's knee and he went down. Liz grabbed for his gun and he was dead a half a breath later. She turned towards him. "I'm willing to fight our way out if you are."

"Ress would have started in the second he couldn't reach me."

"I'm not waiting," Liz snapped and ducked out from their spot.

Jacob growled irritably as he popped up over the desk and took one of the guys down. Liz had another one downed, and that left Berlin.

Who was nowhere to be seen.

Jacob straightened, looking around and keeping his gun level. He heard the distant shouts of _FBI_ from the entrance and he finally lowered his gun, motioning for Liz to do the same. She didn't at first and he took a step towards her. "Hey, we don't know who you are. Don't give them a reason to shoot you."

Liz bristled and lowered her weapon, her face finally relaxing a little into an expression of worry rather than adrenaline fuelled aggression. "Jacob…"

"Don't you dare run, Liz. If you try, all bets are off."

She stood there stiffly, staring at him. "Would you shoot me?" she asked, her voice more curious than accusing.

"For all I know you could try to shoot me," he snapped back, Vienna playing through his mind. After all the nights he'd woken from that nightmare and she had comforted him, it was bizarre to think she might have staged the whole thing.

Pain flashed through his wife's eyes. "This was never about hurting you, Jacob."

"Well you did a fantastic job for not trying," he snapped as the door opened and he leveled a glare in Liz's direction.

She dropped her weapon and kicked it away. FBI agents filled the room, led by Ressler. Two of them stood at Liz's side and cuffed her. Her eyes never left Jacob as he watched them do it. "Are you going to ask me?"

"Ask you what?" he answered, watching her carefully.

"If any of it was real."

"I know the answer," he lied, but she had always been able to see through him where others couldn't.

A small, sad smile tilted her lips. "I don't think you do," she murmured as they led her out.

"Hey," Ressler greeted and Jacob tried to focus on his friend rather than the sick feeling working its way through him. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he managed, pushing the emotions down. "They taking her back to the Post Office?"

"Yeah. Listen, I'm sorry we were a little slow to get in. We got a call saying Cooper was in a hit and run on his way over. They had to rush him to the hospital."

"Damn," Jacob breathed. "Any idea who?"

Ressler frowned and Jacob had a feeling he knew what was coming. "They're holding Liz as a possible accessory. Reddington may still be able to talk her out of it, but… We don't know. She'll spend the night in the box at least under heavy surveillance."

"And me?"

His friend frowned. "I'm sure there'll be questions, Jake, but they're not looking at you. There's no reason for them to."

"My wife is a spy, Ress. There's plenty of reasons to."

"We're going to figure this out."

"Guess we're going to have to."

"Will you go home if I tell you to?"

"No."

"Didn't think so." Ressler heaved a sigh. "Let's see what kind of mess this is going to turn into."

* * *

Even the best laid plans always had a kink or two in them, and this had hardly been a best laid plan. It had been born of desperation to get Elizabeth away from immediate danger before the more long term danger took notice. Reddington didn't have the proof yet, but his suspicion was that Berlin was an attack dog set on him by the Cabal. He would have to have a chat with Alan. Preferably one that didn't include him hanging from the ceiling of a former black site.

The Post Office was in as close to chaos as Reddington imagined it could get. He was let in, per the usual, but stopped before he could make his way to where he could see Elizabeth cuffed inside the box. "I'm sorry, but no one is allowed to speak with her without the lead agent's orders," he was told, but for the life of him he couldn't seem to find out who the lead agent on the case was. Likely either Donald or Phelps, but both men were still cleaning up the mess that the Berlin fiasco had turned into. That was something else that Reddington needed to deal with, but not before speaking with Elizabeth.

"The infamous Raymond Reddington."

Red stopped in his tracks and turned, quirking an eyebrow at the dark haired man that stood with a condescending expression plastered across his face. "And you are?"

"Special Agent Walter Martin. I've been sent in from the DC office to temporarily take over while Assistant Director Cooper is in the hospital. I've been debriefed on our… arrangement with you."

"Oh good. Please call your goons off then. I need to speak with Mrs Phelps."

"No, I don't think that's a good idea."

"Excuse me?"

"Ms Rostova is being held and will be questioned. Berlin is still at large and she can provide invaluable support if she chooses to."

"Harold Cooper assured me that-"

"Harold Cooper is in the hospital after being caught up in a hit and run on his way to the poorly laid out scheme that you and Agent Phelps put together. Don't worry. As soon as he walks through those doors he'll be questioned about it as well."

Reddington snorted. "As I was saying, Agent Cooper assured me that my assistance would provide me a moment with Ms Rostova," he pressed, Liz's birth name leaving his tongue half a second slower than the rest of his sentence.

"Sir, Agent Ressler is on the line for you," an analyst called over.

Martin frowned, glancing to the box where Liz sat cuffed to a chair. "I'm here on orders, Reddington. I don't like this arrangement nor do I approve of it. People like you belong in a deep, dark hole somewhere. That woman too, but it is what it is. Make it quick, because when I'm done, we're escorting you either off the premise or to an office to wait until we know more about what's going on. Am I clear?"

"Something tells me that you're rarely clear in your intentions, Agent Martin," Red answered cheerfully before sidestepping him and moving towards the box. If Martin responded to the quip, he didn't hear it, and Liz looked up as he moved closer to her. "Hello, Elizabeth."

"Reddington," Liz answered, her voice steady and her gaze unreadable. "Where's Jacob?"

"Your husband is handling the case that he's been thrust into. I'm afraid you'll have to settle with me for now."

She tilted her head a little, trying to get a read on him. Reddington continued to smile. "I thought you might have some questions," he prompted after a moment.

"And you'll just tell me?"

"Perhaps. It depends on the question. Please do remember that we are very likely being recorded at this time." He glanced up and gave the camera a small wave.

"Berlin said you knew my birth mother."

"Katarina Rostova. Yes, I knew her."

"How?"

He frowned a little. "For the time being, that is not important."

"You've been… using my husband. Were you using him to find me?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

Reddington sighed, but didn't answer. There was no telling how deeply into the FBI the Cabal's reach went. If they had access to the audio feeds, there was no reason to give them anything more than they already had. He'd hoped that perhaps some of her questions would be ones that he _could_ answer, but she didn't seem inclined to throw any softballs that afternoon.

"Am I on your blacklist?"

That caused the criminal to chuckle. "Goodness, it does sound like Agent Phelps tells you a bit more than he should. That's likely to land him in trouble."

Her expression darkened immediately. "Jacob doesn't have anything to do with this. He didn't know anything about my identity." She looked up at the camera, glaring. "Do you hear me?"

"Patience, Elizabeth. They'll give you a chance to have your say. Him as well, I'm sure, but he'll have Agent Ressler in his court as he often does. Those two are quite amusing, aren't they?"

Liz turned a questioning expression on him. "What do you want, Reddington?"

That was the question, wasn't it? He had been so determined to be near her. He had held back for just the right time to reveal everything and then it had fallen apart. Circumstances weren't idea, but he had made less favourable than these work. "I wanted to make sure you were alright," he confessed softly.

Liz bristled. "So you didn't have any intentions of answering my questions. Fine. No, I'm not alright. I want to see Jacob. I need…" A heavy breath left her. "I need to see him. I'll tell them whatever they want to know as long as I can speak with my husband."

"That won't be happening just yet," Martin said from behind. "Until he's been cleared, he won't be meeting with you."

Reddington glanced back. "I am aware that you're new here, Agent Martin, but things happen a certain way. This team-"

"Doesn't belong to you, Reddington. It's time someone reminds you of that. Agent Thompson here will escort you out of the Post Office. Don't go far. We may have questions."

"I'm sure you will," Reddington answered with a smile. He allowed the young agent to escort him, and Dembe met him in the garage above.

"How is Elizabeth?"

"Rattled, though she's doing her best not to show it. Agent Cooper's hospitalization couldn't have come at a worse time. I need you to get the florist on the phone for me. It's time Alan and I had a chat on my terms."

* * *

He hadn't slept in nearly forty-eight hours. The hunt for Berlin was in full swing and Jacob had thrown himself into it. Somewhere along the way he was called and alerted that the FBI was on route to his home to look for clues. The fact that they had Liz in custody didn't seem to matter. They wanted to know everything and their entire life was up for grabs. He wasn't able to get away immediately, but he had a pretty good idea what to expect, even if he didn't like it.

Hudson was a nervous wreck by the time he got there and there were agents everywhere. They were turning his life more upside down than it had already been. Jacob was a private person, and to have them crawling through every inch of his home set him as on edge as the dog was.

"Agent Phelps, I'm glad to see you here. You're a difficult man to track down."

Jacob turned numbly from where he'd been watching everything. "And who are you?"

"Walter Martin. I'll be filling in for Agent Cooper while he's recovering."

"Any word on him yet?"

"He sustained multiple injuries. There's a list, but they do expect him to make it."

"First bit of good news all day," Jacob sighed.

"I understand that this has likely been a trying day for you, but I've set up a full debrief for first thing tomorrow morning. We'll need to assess exactly where you stand in all of this."

"Shocker," Jacob grumbled. "Listen, I have a job to do. Berlin is still out there, and until we have a better idea what his plan is, I really can't be tied up in protocol. I'll give you the report, but the only reason I'm not out there with my partner right now is because these idiots decided to rip my home apart." A box in a man's hand caught his eye. "Hey, leave that one, would you?"

"Part of your job is to get everyone on the same page as you with this. We have Rostova. Berlin is just a matter of time."

Jacob shot the other man a look. He was a paper pusher out of the DC office that somehow had the clearance to be in the middle of all of this. He didn't like it, but most of all, Jacob didn't trust him. Granted, his trust threshold was pretty low at that point.

"Agent Phelps? We've just about wrapped it up here."

"Great, you want to get out of my house?" he snapped, regretting it immediately. "Sorry, man. It's been a long couple of days. I just need some sleep, so…"

"Eight AM tomorrow," Martin called over his shoulder.

"Yeah." Jacob watched as they cleared everything out, taking what they believed might have to do with the case. The door shut behind them, the sound the last one that seemed to be left save his own breathing. It left him feeling empty, the void threatening to swallow him up as he stood in the front hallway of the townhouse he and Liz had bought when they had first been married. It was quiet in the wake of the chaos, and that quiet rattled him deeply.

Everything reminded him of her and in that, reminded him of what she'd done. Pictures remained on the shelves where as her laptop had been taken as evidence. They hadn't touched the book she'd been reading while they had taken the pile of papers that she had been in the middle of grading from the computer desk. Jacob ghosted through the house, finding reminders in every room and pieces simply missing. Whatever they thought was connected they had taken. Her rings had been the first, though his own still rested on his left ring finger.

Jacob closed his eyes, pulling in a breath he hoped would steady him. It wasn't helping, though, not in the wake of everything, and all at once he ripped the ring off his finger and threw it across the room. It clattered against the wall and onto the floor, but it wasn't enough. He needed to fill the silence in some way.

By the time he was done everything within immediate reach that reminded him of her was on the floor or thrown halfway across the room. Framed photos lay broken, the table overturned, chairs scattered, a bookshelf toppled, and even that stupid lamp that they had bought together on their first night in the new place lay toppled on the ground. Jacob stood in the dining room where he'd ended the outburst, his breathing hitched and his entire body trembling under the strain. Even after all the noise he'd made, he was still left with the silence that followed. It wasn't going to stop. She'd left too big of a hole to fill so easily.

Hudson gave a low whine, butting up under Jacob's hand. "Yeah, buddy," he whispered softly, his voice cracking just a little as he sank back against the breakfast bar that separated the kitchen and the dining room, slowly sliding down to sit on the floor. "Me too."

* * *

Audrey had needed an explanation by the time Ressler wrapped things up and decided to drop by his partner's house to check on him. She deserved one, he knew, but _what_ he could tell her he wasn't sure. Finally he had settled on admitting that Jake and Liz seemed to be having trouble, he didn't know the whole story yet, but that he wanted to check on Jacob before heading home. It wasn't the whole truth, but it was enough to get the point across, and she had given her full blessing and told him just to call and let her know if he decided to stay. That had seemed a little farfetched until he actually got there.

Jacob didn't answer the door, nor did Hudson come running as he always did. Ressler could see just enough to see that the agents were gone and the lights were turned out, so he dug into his pocket and pulled out the spare key that he'd been given but so rarely used. The door eased open and he moved to the second one. The lights were off, but he could see the destruction that he was pretty sure the FBI hadn't caused. They tended to leave things disheveled, but not shattered on the floor. "Jake?" he called quietly, careful not to step on the broken glass in the hallway. He looked down and saw Liz and Jacob smiling back up at him from the photo of their trip to Boston a year after they'd gotten married. Liz's smile looked so carefree and Jacob… Jacob looked happy.

A strange sound echoed softly across the wooden floors, something of a thumping, and Ressler followed it to where he found the man he was looking for. Jacob sat staring straight ahead, leaned against the half wall that stood between the dining room and the kitchen. The table was overturned and one of the chairs entirely smashed. Hudson lay next to his owner, tale thumping against the floor as he looked up and offered Ressler a soft whine.

"Jake, you okay?" Ressler murmured. The better question might have been to ask how bad he really was, but the older man wasn't sure he was ready to ask that, nor was his partner ready to tell him. Hell, Jacob hadn't even acknowledged him yet, even after the question was voiced.

Ressler pulled in a breath, moving carefully to the dark haired agent's side and knelt down. There was dried blood on his hands, as if he had cut them in his rage, and his blue eyes were staring unfocused ahead. He startled a little when Ressler reached out, and pain that echoed in every inch of his expression as he finally turned towards his friend. "Ress?"

"Hey, buddy," Ressler greeted softly. "You did a number on this place."

Jacob's gaze drifted out over the destruction and he shrugged. "Guess so."

Any other time, this would have been the moment that Liz stepped in to handle the situation. Ressler had never been the best at comforting, and Jacob wasn't exactly the easiest person to know how to approach it if he were. Jake locked things down so tightly that when they finally broke free… well, Ressler supposed _this_ was what happened. It had never been this bad, at least not since Ressler had known him, and he was at a loss as to what to do for him. All he knew was that something needed to be done.

"Let's get you up, huh? Did that Agent Martin get ahold of you?"

Jacob mumbled something that Ressler didn't quite catch as he hauled him up, but he thought it was an affirmative. He hoped it was. "You've got a debriefing at eight tomorrow morning. You should probably get some sleep before that."

He didn't receive an argument, nor did Jacob fight him as he helped him slowly up the stairs. The younger man didn't say or do anything other than give the barest of efforts in following Ressler's directions. It was slow moving, but he finally got him up and Jacob halfway fell into the bed on top of the comforter, Hudson hopping up with him and curling up protectively. His hands weren't bleeding anymore, and Ressler wondered just how long his partner had been sitting in the dark like he'd found him. He got them cleaned up as best as he could, wrapping up the right one that had a gash along his palm that looked fairly shallow. Through it all, Jacob didn't say one word.

Ressler pulled in a breath, worry creeping up in dangerous levels. He wasn't sure what to do next. This wasn't a physical injury that he could get him help for, and he certainly wasn't equipped to help his partner work through the emotional trauma of finding out his wife had likely never loved him. With all Jacob had been through over the years, Ressler knew that Liz was one of the last people he would have expected to betray him. He'd let her in, past all the safeguards, and he had _trusted_ her. The trust that Ressler knew that he had in him was what made his next move so important. He didn't dare go outside of that very small circle of trust for help, not even to Audrey.

"I'll be right back, okay?" he murmured and Jacob didn't stir. Slowly he made his way back down the stairs, looking around until he remembered that his partner's phone had been shattered in his wife's escape attempt. Ressler snorted at the thought and looked through the drawers until he found an address book, hoping that the number was current as he dialed it into his own cell.

The phone rang once, twice, and the lateness of the hour nearly had him hanging up after the third ring, but a sleepy " _Hello_?" came through from the other end.

"Kelly? Hey. It's Don Ressler. I… Something's happened with Jake." The call had been a bad idea. He knew that Kelly wouldn't let it rest with a simple explanation that Liz left. She would need it all, and the woman had a sixth sense for lying. There was no question that, even if it hadn't been filed as such yet, the situation with Masha Rostova was highly classified, but Ressler was at the end of his knowledge on how to help his friend. Some things were more important.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I really wish the show would give us a glimpse of the aftermath of something. With Jacob, specifically, but honestly they leave out the aftermath of a lot. (Liz barely got a chance to react to when Luther Braxton kidnapped her and she was forced under hypnosis.) They've talked about the fact that Jacob's story in the show is, at least in part, him 'becoming a real boy' and 'building a soul'. I hope that as he does that, we get a glimpse of how his near-perfect control slips when those emotions that he hasn't had to deal with start slipping through and he has to face them. Until then, I'll just have to settle for my AU in which he's had at least a little more emotional experience than in the show.

And, by the way, I just need to have a fangirl moment and say: BLACKLIST IS BACK ON THIS WEEK!!!! Ahem.

Next time - Jacob speaks to Liz, Reddington and Alan Fitch have their chat, and Samar is tasked with finding out exactly where Jacob's loyalties lie.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

"You understand how insane this all sounds, don't you?"

Ressler risked a glance over at Bruce who stood with him in the doorway, neither of them willing to crowd the room as Kelly moved silently in. "Yeah, but I've seen it. She's… This is really screwed up."

Bruce shook his head, a huff escaping him in the form of a sigh. "That kid deserves better than this."

"She took us all by surprise." His lips thinned out and his gaze focused in on his friend. "I've known Jake nearly ten years. We've been through hell and back together, but I've never seen him do this. He's gone quiet before, but never this."

"Jake processes things differently than most people. It takes him a little longer to sort through his emotions. Kelly's always been good at helping him do that." He cleared his throat a little awkwardly. "I know you probably broke a dozen different rules and such to call us-"

"Not quite that many, but a few," Ressler answered softly. "I didn't know what else to do. They're already going to put him through the wringer." If they found out about this, Ressler wasn't sure what they would do.

Jacob had fallen asleep sometime before his adopted parents had arrived, but he stirred a little when Kelly took a seat on the bed, the movement instantly silencing both Ressler and Bruce in the doorway as they strained to listen. Kelly didn't say anything, simply reached out and smoothed back his dark hair until he shifted again. "Hey there."

"Mom?" Jacob's voice was raspy and tight, strained with all the emotions that had caused him to shut down.

Kelly smiled a little. "Don told us what happened. Well, I'm sure he left out a few details, but… Have you spoken to her?"

"Not much." Jacob cleared his throat and moved to sit up a little. "We brought her in."

"But you don't know what will happen to her?"

Jacob shook his head, the motion stiff. "Not yet." He heaved a deep breath in. "I should have seen it. I don't… I've always got a good read on things. People can't play me like that."

Kelly didn't answer him right away, as if she were running the thoughts through her mind before she said them. "I always thought Liz was a little...off. I couldn't place it, but she fit so well with you and you both loved each other so much that it didn't seem to matter."

"I loved her. I don't think it was ever real for her."

"Is it possible it was?"

Jacob looked up at her. "How could she-"

"Sweetheart, you've done some very odd things over the years for the people you care about because you thought it would protect them in some way."

"You think she was-"

"I don't know what she was doing. I'm just saying… Honey, Liz is special. I don't care if she's the world's best actress, if you fell in love with her, there's something there that was real."

"You don't even know her. Hell, _I_ don't even know her."

"No, but I know you, and I know what it takes for someone to leave a lasting mark on you. You don't know yet it it's a good or bad one, but you can find out."

Ressler bit his tongue hard, every inch of him wanting to ask Kelly what the hell she was doing. Didn't the woman see he was in enough turmoil without going and adding to it? Of course Liz - or Masha, or whatever her name was - didn't love him. She was a trained killer, a spy. She'd purposefully gone in and used Jacob….

He stopped, blinking hard. She'd used _Jacob_. Of all the people she could have chosen, all the ins she could have found, she chose the man that Ressler was fairly sure had never gone on more than two dates with the same woman and usually didn't do even that. This trained infiltrator had chosen the most difficult mark possible and had made him fall in love with her. Jacob didn't _have_ a type. It was impossible to know how to get past his barriers. The few that did sort of just tumbled through at some point. It was a terrifying thought, but Kelly was right. Somehow Jacob must have fallen in love with something real. No one was that good. And if he did, that meant that it was possible…

"You okay?" Bruce asked, startling Ressler out of his thoughts.

"This is so weird."

His friend's father snorted. "That's an understatement."

Kelly turned over to them and offered a smile. "Anything we should know?"

"He has to be at work by eight tomorrow morning for a debrief of everything," Ressler answered.

"You said that earlier," his friend huffed irritably.

"Yeah, well, when you go catatonic on me I don't know what you hear and what you don't."

Jacob sat up slowly and turned to look at Ressler. Without a word Kelly leaned over and pressed a kiss to the side of her son's head and moved past Ressler to start down the stairs, she and Bruce giving the two men a moment to talk.

Ressler shifted awkwardly.

"Thanks," Jacob murmured, his gaze drifting down to the wrinkled comforter under him. After a moment it shifted back up, locking with Ressler's. "You're one of the few people I know I can trust, Ress. Thank you."

"Anytime, Jake," the older man managed after a moment. "Listen, I'm not very good at this, but… You know the only way now is to just go straight through it, right?"

"Yeah. I know."

"They're going to have a lot of questions, but you know I have your back, right?"

A small smile flickered across his friend's lips. "You always do." He sighed, running his hand through his short hair. "Listen, Ress, I'm exhausted, and I need to be able to think straight tomorrow."

"Yeah. I'll see you at the Post Office."

Jacob nodded, shifting to crawl under the blankets instead of in top of them. Ressler turned, finding Kelly and Bruce waiting at the bottom of the stairs. "He's trying to get some sleep," he said, motioning back up.

"Well, neither of us will tonight," Kelly murmured, her gaze drifting to the broken townhouse. "We'll make sure he's up and out on time tomorrow morning."

"Thanks. If you guys need anything…"

"We've got your cell now," Kelly assured him.

He nodded before forcing himself to turn and leave. It was late, but he didn't think there was much more he could do there. The best thing to do was to go home and get as much sleep as he could before returning to the hunt for Berlin the next day.

* * *

Reddington was sitting and waiting when Alan Fitch walked into his office, and had been for some time. The older man man frowned deeply. "Do I want to know how you got in here, Ray?"

"Persistence. You never responded yesterday. I wasn't willing to wait any longer."

Fitch moved and took a seat. "What is so important that you feel the need to break into my office so early in the morning?"

"You're aware of the nature of my relationship with Harold Cooper's task force."

"Yes, I seem to remember a discussion on that topic," Fitch said pointedly and it was Reddington's turn to frown.

"I'd like to point out how easily we could have had a civilised conversation. Just like now."

"What do you want, Ray?"

"The task force has apprehended a young woman named Elizabeth Phelps."

"Masha Rostova. Her name crossed my desk yesterday evening."

"I need her released."

"And what makes you think I can or would do that?"

"Because I would like to think, despite everything, that you and I still have an understanding. Martin has your stench all over him. If your organization had anything to do with Agent Cooper's-"

Fitch stiffened. "I don't make a habit of attacking my own people."

Reddington loosed a breath. He had very little respect for most of the men and women in Fitch's organization, but the man himself was a fairly straight shooter. Well, as much as anyone in the intelligence community was.

"Agent Martin is there to get better understanding of your task force. This fiasco with Rostova's daughter could make some people nervous. I'd like to have a few answers for myself before it spreads. He's under my direct supervision. He won't hurt her, Red." He paused, and Reddington felt his gaze on him. "If there's anything I should know-"

"You already know she's Katarina's daughter. What more do you need?" Reddington snapped. The others didn't seem to know yet, which was something at least. Fitch trusted him enough to give him that.

"Is she yours?"

That caught the younger man a little by surprise. Of all those that were a part of the Cabal, Alan likely knew him best. He wasn't sure quite what that meant, but the other man had at least suspected his affair with Rostova. If anyone else in the Cabal did or if Fitch had mentioned it to anyone, Red had no way to know.

"You wouldn't tell me if she were," Fitch chuckled. "Are you going to take her and leave?"

"Would that make your colleagues more comfortable?"

"I'll tell you something, Ray, and maybe this'll convince you that you have at least one person that _wants_ to trust you on the inside."

"And what is that, Alan?"

"There's a lot of unrest in general right now. Powers are trying to shift."

Reddington leaned back in his seat. "Our deal still stands, Alan."

"Good. So far, I've convinced the others of that too. We'll get it under control. We always do."

"You play a dangerous game."

"And you don't?" The older man chuckled. "You've done some good with that task force. Are you leaving it now that you have what you want?"

"She'll want to stay if she can."

"What on earth for?"

"She's in love with her husband."

"The one she married in orders from this Berlin fellow?"

"The same."

Fitch was laughing at him now. "Same one that tried to kill you once, didn't he?"

"Oh, we've taken some swipes at each other over the years."

"Not his biggest fan?"

Reddington snorted. "He doesn't deserve her."

A smirk tilted the other man's lips. "They never do. Don't worry about your girl, Ray. They don't know about her yet, but they will over time. Running now will make you look like you're hiding something-"

"But staying doesn't sound a great deal better," Reddington sighed, standing. "I'd like her out of the box at the very least."

"I'll push Martin for an assessment."

"Thank you." Reddington fit his hat back in his head and turned to leave.

* * *

They had at least uncuffed her to let her sleep. Not that she had done a great deal of that with the lights on and the knowledge that they were watching her every move. It wasn't like the cot was overly comfortable either.

The sound of arguing caught her attention and Liz looked to the entrance where Jacob stood, hands moving as he spoke in an agitated manner. He motioned towards the box and the agent he was speaking with seemed to relent. A moment later, her husband was crossing the space between them.

He looked exhausted, like he's barely slept in days, but he strode forward at his usual quick pace, his focus suddenly on her.

Liz wasn't sure when she had stood or moved to the glass so that she could meet him there, but she had, and she found herself on the receiving end of one of the coldest glares she'd ever seen from him. "I wasn't sure you'd come."

"And I don't have long," he answered, voice snipped.

She waited, thinking that there'd be more. There should have been. There should have been threats and questions and anger. He should be making demands and even fishing for clues, but Jacob just stood there until she finally reached a hand up to the glass, fingers pressed against it. "Say something," she managed.

Her husband swallowed hard. "You told me to ask. I'm asking."

Liz stared at him, her mind refusing to process. "Asking what?" Then it struck her. "If it was real?" He gave a tense nod and she forced herself to be honest. "Not at first, but it became real for me."

"When?"

Blue eyes slipped closed and it was everything she could do not to lean against the glass. "Vienna," she breathed after a moment. "I got this call from your partner. It was the earliest hours of the morning here. He was… I'd only met Ressler a few times, but I knew he wasn't easily rattled. He told me that you'd been shot." She refused to look at him while she spoke. If she did, she would read his expression and react to it. She didn't want that. Not now. Now, if she had any hope at all, she needed to be honest with him. She needed to try. What the worst that could happen? She drew in a breath to continue. "I flew out on the first flight. I didn't have to, but I told myself it was for the cover. There are only so many lies you can tell yourself when you think you might lose someone who's become important."

Carefully, she looked up at him, to find his expression carefully blank. "Is that it?"

"That's the truth," she answered. What else did he want? "If you want the why behind it, I don't know." She waited and all he did was nod, turning as if he were going to leave. Panic rose up in her and she pounded her fist against the glass. "Jacob? Jacob, please. Just _look_ at me! This wasn't about hurting you. I… What do you want me to say? That I should have told you everything as soon as I knew I loved you? Should I have made you choose between your work and me? Or should I have just left you without a word? Believe me, I've gone over _every_ option. None of them-"

"You could have _trusted_ me," he growled as he turned back to her, the mask finally cracking. "But you didn't, and now I don't trust you."

The words struck her hard and as he turned back around and started for the door, Liz felt the dam break and her knees gave way beneath her. She sank to the floor of her clear cage for all of the FBI's little task force to see, the first real tears she'd cried in a long time slipping down her face as she watched him walk away.

* * *

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Martin growled as Jacob brushed past him.

"Getting a feel for the situation," he answered, his voice surprisingly steady for the rush of emotions that were running through him.

"You went against orders and were talking to Rostova."

"I'm sorry, I'm running on maybe five hours of sleep in the last sixty or so. I must have forgotten."

Martin stared at him like he'd lost his mind, and maybe he had. Jacob had always toed the line, but pushing his luck with the interim director was downright stupid and he knew it. Somehow, though, the other man let it slide. "Go down to interrogation room B. You'll be speaking with Agent Navabi so that she can-"

"Woh, what?" Jacob cut in. "Navabi? She just got here."

"That's the point. What, you think I was going to have Ressler or Malik take your statement? I've heard about you, Agent Phelps. You're good. You might even be good enough to be working with Rostova or Reddington and have your entire team thinking you're one of the good guys."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Jacob growled and Martin didn't budge.

"It means let me do my job, Phelps. You'll be talking to Navabi."

"Who'll be talking to Liz?"

"Malik will be interrogating Rostova."

Jacob nodded slowly. At least Meera would treat Liz fairly. He wasn't sure about Navabi yet. "Fine."

"Agent Navabi is waiting for you."

Jacob didn't answer as he started down the corridor for the room. Just as Martin had said, the Mossad-turned-FBI agent sat waiting patiently, looking up as he came through the door. She offered him a smile and motioned to a cup of coffee sitting in front of the opposite chair. "I spoke to Ressler this morning. He said you'd been up a while and told me how you take it."

If he'd been any less exhausted he never would have accepted it, but Jacob sank down into the chair and immediately took a sip. Well, at least she really had talked to Ressler. She had to have to get it right.

"I've never seen you in glasses before," Navabi acknowledged.

He blinked hard, trying to clear his vision. He'd slept in his contacts the night before and his eyes still felt dry. "Like I told Martin, I'm running on about five hours of sleep in the last couple of days." He shifted, leaning forward. "You can stop trying to get a read on me. You won't, even as tired as I am. Can we just get this over with so I can get back to work? Berlin's still out there and you and I are both tied up in here with Meera in with Liz. I'd rather not leave Ress on his own for it any longer than we have to."

"Liz," Samar echoed, leaning back in her chair. "Not Masha? Or even Rostova?"

"What do you expect? I've been married to the woman for nearly three years. With her for four, going on five."

"How did you two meet?"

She hadn't bothered with a lie detector. They were starting in with the pretence of equals, but Jacob didn't trust her. He hadn't since she came into the Post Office looking for Masha Rostova.

Samar took a drink from her own cup. "At your pace, Phelps, but like you said, the sooner we finish here, the sooner we help our team."

"Our team," he scoffed.

"Isn't it?"

"Ress and Meera are my team. I'm not sure what you have to gain from being here."

She hummed softly to herself and he sighed heavily. He didn't have to like her to admit she was right. He was tired and his guard was up in full force. He needed to give her something or they'd never get out of there. "I met Liz in Paris in 2010. It was a little cafe that I'd stopped by to get a cup of coffee at before we wrapped things up there and followed the next trail after Reddington. She bumped into me and apologized in probably the worst French I'd ever heard in my life." A small smile tilted his lips ever so slightly, despite everything that was happening. "I switched the conversation to English and we started talking. You've read my file before coming in here. I don't connect well."

"Is that how you put it?" Navabi asked curiously.

"That's how everyone puts it," he answered tightly. "But with Liz it came… easy. I had a few minutes to spare, so we sat and talked. All of a sudden Ress is there looking for me saying that he'd been calling and I was late. He probably thought I'd been shot dead or something." He glanced up to see to see her listening intently. "We exchanged numbers before I left and I promised to call her the next time I was in DC. I didn't really think that I would, but I couldn't get her out of my head."

"I imagine you'd promised to call a few women over the years."

"What makes you say that?"

"You don't follow up because you don't feel a connection, but you've been taught not to purposefully step on other people's feelings. You were adopted at fourteen, weren't you?"

"Yeah."

"Was your wife close with your parents?"

"Yeah."

"They live here?"

Jacob closed his eyes, willing himself under control. "Yeah. They moved here to help with the adoption… when we were going to adopt."

"Did you sense something was wrong? Is that why you called it off?"

"No, she called it off."

"Why?"

Blue eyes flickered up to meet brown. Because she was afraid Reddington was going to get him killed was the answer Liz had given him. She didn't want to raise the baby alone. Admitting the truth would also be admitting to leaking classified intel to a woman that had turned out to be an undercover agent. He'd been open with her because they were married and she had said that she needed to trust him. It had made sense. He'd needed her to trust him too.

"That's personal."

"You're entire life is under scrutiny now, Phelps. There's no such thing as personal here."

He watched her watching him, his back straightening and he squared his shoulders. "This job terrified her," he answered after a moment.

"How much did she know about your job? Did she ask questions, probe?"

"She knew it was dangerous. It nearly got me killed a couple of times over the years. She knew when I was shot and she knew when I was poisoned last year. She knew when Meera had to go to my parents house to provide a protective detail for her and Audrey when Mako Tanida was offing Ressler's and my old team."

"You were shot by Max Bouchard in 2011, weren't you?"

"Yeah. That should be in your notes," he answered, motioning to her files in front of her.

Navabi flipped through them. "In 2011 Bouchard was working for Berlin. Our sources say that he'd just switched his allegiances from-"

"Reddington. Yeah, Reddington had mentioned that recently."

"So your wife, who worked for Berlin, started dating you to get close to Reddington?"

"As far as we understand so far, yes."

"And you were nearly killed by another known associate of Berlin."

"Liz didn't know about that."

"How can you be sure? You said she knew that you'd been shot."

"We haven't talked about much since everything came out, but… Her being involved in my shooting doesn't make sense. She needed me alive to get to Reddington." She had wanted him out. She had begged him to get out. It didn't make sense if she had been after Reddington, but wanting him dead didn't make sense either. None of it did. None of it would without answers.

"What is her connection to Reddington? Besides Berlin, I mean."

"You'll need to ask Reddington that. I don't know."

She paused, watching him carefully. "I think you're lying."

Jacob closed his eyes, steadying himself. "Really? Because I think you're wasting my time trying to make a niche for yourself in the bureau. I married the woman that told me her name was Elizabeth Scott in 2011 after falling in love with her. I found her wedding rings at the site that Rostova had allegedly lent to Masterson and confronted her about them that night. We fought, she knocked me out, Reddington showed up at my place, we went to this Major guy, and set up the extraction. The FBI knows everything that happened from that point forward, so can you just ask me whatever the hell you want to know so that I can make sure that I don't lose my partner to this nutcase too because I was too busy being tied up in all the protocol that this task force was supposed to bypass anyway!" He was standing by the time he'd finished, frustration making him edgy. "I found out she was Masha Rostova - the woman that I have been looking for, by the way, to find out why the hell Reddington was so interested in me - when I found her rings. That's the first time. Before then, I never even suspected." He sat heavily back into his chair.

"Do you still love her?"

Jacob blinked his eyes open and looked tiredly at her. "I don't even know her."

"Yes or no, Agent Phelps. Do you love her?"

"Yes," the word left him softly without permission. He couldn't deny it. Even he wasn't that talented of a liar.

"Do you believe she loves you?"

"I don't know yet."

She nodded, scribbled something in her notes, and stood without another word, moving towards the door. Martin was standing there when she opened it and he looked very unhappy. "Get your stuff together, Phelps. You're meeting Ressler to go out in the field. Orders just came down from above all our heads. Masha Rostova is going to provide intel to us, and if it leads to Berlin, we'll talk about a deal with her."

"I'm cleared?" Jacob asked, making sure he was hearing him right.

"She was going to recommend it anyway," Martin grumbled, motioning to Navabi and Jacob turned a questioning look on her.

She shrugged. "If I'm going to work with you I need to know I can trust you, Agent Phelps, and you need to be honest to yourself about it. You still love her. I knew it, I just had to make sure you knew it. Shall we?"

He nodded numbly, following her out of the interrogation room. He had never met an interrogator that he hadn't seen coming a mile away, but Navabi was good, he'd have to give her that. He wasn't sure he liked her any better than he had, but at least he respected her a little more.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, I found the Google Docs App's limit today. Apparently 105K+ words is just too much for the mobile app, so it kept shutting EBtY down today. Drove me nuts. I'm now working from multiple documents so that I can have a master file and can still access what I'm currently writing on via the app. Isn't technology great? lol

In other rather fun news: I'm a complete nerd. I actually started watching the Blacklist because I found Ryan Eggold through the mini series Sons of Liberty, in which he played Joseph Warren, one of my historical heroes. When I met Ryan last summer we chatted about Joseph, so I may have just invited him to the 275th birthday bash (aka a few history nerds getting together in Boston and toasting Warren) that's happening this summer. He liked the tweet, which made me happier than I likely should be lol I just felt the need to share that with you guys :D

Also: I'm running a bit of an experiment. Many times my readers for my Blacklist works tend to be Keen2 fans, simply because that's what I write and I focus in on Jacob so heavily. Something really cool that I've noticed is that I have a much wider range of Blacklist fans reading on this story, which makes me very excited. I'm curious, if you ship, what do you ship?

As always, thank you for your awesome reviews! :)

Next time - Ressler and Aram uncover some data that Liz took from her laptop when she left, Liz asks Red an important question, Harold Cooper returns to the task force, and Don Ressler gets so much needed good news.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

"Aram, please tell me you have some good news for me," Ressler said as he stopped by the technician desk, feeling the weight against his shoulders. He had barely slept the night before, even with Audrey holding onto him and doing whatever she could to help. There was nothing that could be done, not until they had answers, and that's what had Donald Ressler so knotted up. There was a good chance they wouldn't like the answers that they got.

"I've been harassing them since this morning at six to get me that laptop. I got it about half an hour ago."

"Well, at least you're on top of things," Ressler sighed.

"I have to be. We all do. I mean, I can't even imagine what Agent Phelps is going through. Is he-"

"Jake's in with Navabi giving his statement. From what I hear he tried to go see Li- Rostova this morning, which won't help."

"You can't blame him for it," Aram murmured.

"I don't. I blame her. Let me know when you find something, okay?"

"Well, I think I already have," Aram said quickly before Ressler had a chance to turn away. "You know how the initial search turned up data missing from the computer they took from her...home?" he asked, the last word leaving him awkwardly as if he realized that it was Jacob's home as well.

"Yeah. I've been hoping you could uncover what she wiped from it."

"I did, but in a little different way than usual. They found a jumpdrive on her when they arrested her. I haven't seen what's on it yet, but the data fits perfectly. Whatever it is is what she took off her home laptop. As far as we can tell, it's the only thing she took with her when she left."

"After knocking Jake out cold in the floor of their home," Ressler groused. "Can you pull it up? We need to see what's on it. I'm thinking it has to be something to do with her employment with Berlin. She couldn't have kept it all at the safehouse."

"Exactly. She would need something on hand. This certainly seems like-"

"Just play it, Aram."

"Right," the technician answered and plugged the jumpdrive in.

The file opened and Ressler watched the dark haired man speed through any layers of protection. "They seem to be video files," he mused as they flickered onto the screen.

Documents of some kind came into the frame. They were blurred, like the camera on her phone hadn't quite focused in on them yet. " _I don't want you to get too excited_ ," Jacob's voice sounded off to the side. " _They're really picky about who they let in. They might take one look at me and-_ "

" _Would you stop_?" Liz laughed from behind the camera. " _Help me get this thing to focus_?" The screen cleared and application paperwork came into view. " _Okay, what we're seeing here are the applications for the beginning of the Phelps family adoption process starting in September 2012_."

" _You don't have to document everything, Lizzie,_ " Jacob chuckled and the camera swiveled around to him.

" _And this would be the man that wants nothing more to adopt, so what does he do? Tries to convince himself he's not at all excited about this. Even you're not that good of a liar, babe_ ," she teased him and he rolled his eyes. " _I want to remember everything and be able to show our little girl or boy what we did to bring them home._ "

" _I just don't want to be disappointed_ ," he answered and reached for the camera. " _Turn that off, would you?_ "

The file ended and a new one began of Liz holding the camera out in front of them and pressing a kiss to Jacob's cheek as they both came into focus and saying something about their first meeting with the social worker. They continued in that way, Jacob slowly looking a little more comfortable in it with each snippet and Liz narrating what seemed to be the adoption process they'd been through.

Ressler watched silently, never quite able to tell Aram to switch it off. There had to be something. She had to have hidden something under it or in it all. Finally, they came to a video that started panning across their living room showing off all of the baby toys and bed and stroller. The camera came around to focus on Jacob who was sitting on the couch with a barely subdued smile. " _Okay, babe. Are you ready to admit it_?" Liz asked cheerfully.

" _I think it's safe enough now_ ," he chuckled and reached forward, pulling the camera around so that they were both in the shot. " _We're going to have a baby boy. Liz and I are going to be parents._ "

Liz grinned widely and kissed him before the screen blacked out and nothing else popped up. "That's it?" Ressler asked. "It has to be covering something."

"I can keep looking, but as far as I can see, it's just the videos."

"Are there any more?"

"She canceled the adoption a couple days after that."

Both men turned to see Jacob standing there, Samar with him. Ressler had no idea how long he'd been there. "Jake…"

"Is that the jump drive she had on her?"

"Yeah."

"And there were just videos?"

"It looks like she documented the adoption process," Aram said quietly.

"She was really excited," Jacob murmured. "I thought she was, anyway."

"And what would you do with a child at home when all of this came crashing down?" Reddington asked as he strode in like he owned the place. Ressler saw his partner tense at that statement.

"How did you convince her to drop it?" he demanded.

"That is a discussion for another day, Agent Phelps. One in which we are not hunting down a man who was going to kill your wife to get to me."

"What the hell is your connection with her anyway?" Ressler grumbled.

Reddington glanced around the room and shrugged. "My own for now, Donald. Elizabeth has agreed to help you catch Berlin in any way that she can. In return, once Agent Malik clears her, she will be released."

"Released?" Samar echoed. "That's a bit premature."

"Well, the details are still being ironed out. Agent Cooper's hospitalisation has added another complication."

Well, at least Ressler wasn't the only one uncomfortable with Agent Martin.

"Let's focus on Berlin. What do we have?" Jacob asked.

"Plenty," Meera said from the entryway, Liz standing with her, cuffed, but otherwise moving in her own.

Ressler turned to his partner whose expression had entirely closed off.

Liz took a deep breath. "Berlin moves his money through the Monarch Douglas bank in Warsaw. He's hired out operatives from half a dozen different organisations, including a couple that are pit against each other and would be very unhappy to know that bit of information. His main target is you-" she turned to look at Reddington- "but he's willing to rip through anyone he needs to to get to you. He seemed to think I had some sort of connection through my mother to you, but if I do, I don't know what it is. You want to make an arrest, you dangle Reddington out in front of him. Same if it's easier to just put a bullet in his head."

"Why is he after Red?" Ressler asked and Liz shrugged.

"Something about killing his daughter. Or getting her killed. He's thought about going after his ex wife."

"Carla Reddington," Reddington offered, "though she likely goes by something else these days."

Jacob cleared his throat. "We'll put her in protective custody and shut down his funds. It'll make him desperate."

"Any idea about his real name?" Samar prompted.

"Berlin was all I was ever given," Liz answered.

"I'll reach out to my contacts with Mossad. He's been on our radar. Someone is bound to know something."

"I'll speak to my contacts at the CIA as well," Meera offered.

"Good. Let's find this guy," Ressler said.

* * *

It was quiet more than it wasn't once she had provided the information. They gave her a holding cell within the Post Office that provided at least some privacy and she was fitted with a tracking chip. Liz was left alone for the most part unless they needed her to verify something or provide further information. She gave it to them, even if she wasn't entirely sure why. Even if Reddington worked out some sort of deal for her and she was released, Jacob could barely look at her. When she spoke to the team on whole he avoided eye contact and only spoke when he absolutely had to. He hated her, and that hate killed her a little inside.

Reddington was the only one that actually visited her for the sake of visiting, though he was following leads nearly as intently as the task force was. When he dropped by their conversations were recorded and he said very little of substance that gave her a true hint as to their connection. It was driving her insane. She couldn't see Jacob, couldn't convince him that she had fallen in love with him, and she couldn't even get answers from the man that had them. When he dropped by one late afternoon - as far as she could guess in her windowless cell - Liz was determined to take control of this insane ride she had found herself on.

"Did Jacob make it back from… Wherever he ended up this time? I'm losing track."

"Oh, he's been back for days. They're following the money trail with Luli's help. They found a name."

Liz perked. "Really?"

"Yes. I'll be following up with my own sources over the next few days, so I thought I'd come check on you before I left. I see they provided you with some reading material."

She glanced over to the books and a small smile crossed her lips. "Jacob loves _The Count Of Monte Christo_. He's been bugging me for ages to read it. I guess I have time." She glanced up, watching her mysterious benefactor's expression as she spoke. "Did you know that I don't remember anything before I was four or so?"

"Nothing at all?" he asked carefully, and Liz shook her head, her fingers moving absently across the scar on her wrist.

"I was in a fire. I remember glimpses in nightmares, but nothing specific. Nothing about how it started or if anyone else was in the house with me. Social Services said that when they picked me up I barely spoke. They asked me my name and I told them that _he_ called me Lizzie. I don't remember saying it. I don't remember who he is. They couldn't ID me and I went into foster care for six years until Bud found me." She watched Reddington stiffen. "You called me Lizzie. On the phone, right after I killed Jolene Parker. No one calls me that."

"Jacob does."

"He's the only one."

"Perhaps I picked it up from him?"

A small smirk tilted her lips. "I think you're lying."

"I'm a criminal, Elizabeth. Criminals are notorious liars."

"I knew you before the fire, didn't I? At least give me that. You knew my mother. Did you know me? Are you-?"

"I did know you as a child, though that is a story for another day, Elizabeth. For now, I need to do everything in my power to get you released. Once I do, we can talk all you like. I'll take you anywhere you want. There's this little hole in the wall restaurant in a town in Germany that-"

"I don't want to leave. Jacob's here and-"

"Do you really think he's going to just forgive and forget everything that's happened? Your husband is driven, Elizabeth, and has a much darker side than you dare give him credit for. It's not wise to -"

"I have to try. I can't leave until I at least talk to him. He has to know. You don't understand… Until his parents, everyone threw him away and used him. He's going to think I was just another one doing the same."

"Weren't you?"

"At first, but then I got to know him. I… I love him. I'm not just saying that for the cameras. I wanted to build a family with him, grow old with him."

"That may not be possible now," Reddington said softly, his expression tightening a little.

"I have to try."

"One thing at a time," he assured her and stood, starting for the door to leave her alone once again.

* * *

Getting rid of Martin in exchange for Harold Cooper had been a happy surprise, and one sorely needed in the nonstop rush that the hunt for Berlin was turning into. Jacob had barely stopped since it had started, sleeping only when he absolutely had to in order to function. It weighed on him, but somehow less so than the empty side of his bed at home. In the moments when he was forced to stop and wait, though, he could feel it cutting through him like a knife.

The door to Cooper's office opened and Jacob pushed himself off the wall he'd leaned into, forcing a smile and reaching out a hand. "Good to see you back, sir."

Cooper took it. "You look like hell, Phelps. Come in. Sorry I kept you waiting."

Jacob watched the older man turn, leaning heavily on a cane and the sickening realization that he could be pulled from the assignment washed over him. "Agent Cooper, I'm more than capable-"

"No one's questioning that. Have a seat. I'm not pulling you away from this. You'll just go at it alone anyway." Cooper sat heavily in his chair behind his desk. "This isn't on the record," he advised, "but I needed… I asked you to find the link with Reddington and you did. You did your job and I'm sorry it's turned out this way."

"Do we know what's going to happen to her?"

Cooper sighed. "If her Intel leads us to Berlin, we'll work out a deal with her, much like Reddington's."

"With this task force?"

"Reddington has indicated that he won't work separately from her if that's how it pans out. I haven't spoken to the others, but you're the one that this affects most directly. I'd hate to lose you, Phelps, but I understand if you can't-"

"Are you transferring me?" Jacob demanded.

"I'm giving you an out if you want it. I don't need an answer now, of course, but I wanted to give you time to think." He paused and Jacob felt his gaze on him. "I've spent the last couple of days going over everything. Do you think she's still putting on a show?"

The younger man closed his eyes and pulled in a deep breath. "I can't see why she would be. She's confessed to working for Berlin and a number of other crimes. She's been working with us without any fight. If she wants something else, I don't know what it is."

"She's asked to see you on multiple occasions."

"I know."

Cooper shifted. "I don't pretend to understand what you're going through, Jacob. I wouldn't dare. You're a good agent though. I had my doubts in the beginning, but not anymore. Whatever you decide, whatever answers you need, I'll support you in them once she's been cleared."

Jacob blinked hard. "Sir, that's-"

"We get around the rules every day here. You've given everything for this. It's time it gives back just a little."

I don't know what I'm going to do yet. I've been focused on finding Berlin."

"I know, but there'll be a day we catch him and you can't run from it anymore. Just give it some thought. You're welcome to stay in any capacity. You'd be-" Cooper have a small chuckle- "impossible to replace."

Jacob offered him a small smile. "Thank you, sir. It's good to have you back."

"Take care of yourself, Phelps. Get some sleep. You look like you need it."

"I'll do my best, sir."

He stood and gave Cooper another nod before starting for the lift that would take him out of the Post Office. Jacob paused at the bottom of the stairs, risking a look down the hall towards Liz's holding cell. They'd been at this for weeks now and he hated it, but what good would talking to her do until it was done? He sighed, running his hand through his dark hair and shuffling towards the lift. He had to focus. He would figure out his next move once they had Berlin.

* * *

He thought the days might be getting longer. He couldn't say that for sure, but they felt like it. Ressler felt like he left earlier, came home later, and ran all over the world in between. Audrey had been understanding. More understanding than she should have been, possibly, and maybe that's what had led Ressler to telling her, at least in broad strokes, what had happened. The only permission he'd asked had been Jacob's, and his partner had told him not to keep secrets from the woman he was going to marry. It had been both a relief and a burden to tell her. He wasn't like Jacob. He knew the rules were there for a reason, but it has helped to be able to talk to her on those days when Jake wouldn't say a word.

Ressler tossed his keys on the table and shrugged his jacket from his shoulders. He could smell dinner, but Audrey must have cooked it hours before. "Sweetheart?" he called, trudging further in.

She peeked out of their bedroom. "Hey. Dinner's warmed in the oven. I didn't know when you'd be home, so…"

"I know. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologise. There's a difference in your tunnel vision and this. How's Jake?"

"About the same. I don't think he's sleeping."

"Poor guy," she murmured. "I can't imagine what he's going through."

"He's so stubborn about it," Ressler sighed as he bent down to find leftover lasagna warming in the oven. "I mean, I'm not a person that shares a lot-"

"Understatement," his fiancé cut in.

"- but he's driving himself nuts with this. I guarantee the only time he's eaten is when his mom force feeds him. He needs to come off the assignment, but short of locking _him_ up, that won't do any good."

Audrey crossed the space between them and Ressler paused as she wrapped her arms around him from behind, pressing her cheek against his back. "What do you think will happen when you catch the guy?"

"I have no idea. Cooper's back, and he's talking about honouring a deal he made." He turned around in her arms. "Can we talk about your day?"

Her expression brightened. "Well, I have some good news that might just counter all the bad."

"I'd love some good news."

Mischief danced her her eyes as she smiled. "I know we said we were going to wait until after the wedding to start on the family, but…"

It took a moment for his sleep deprived mind to wrap around her words. "You're… You're pregnant?" he managed, a grin of his own finally breaking free. "Audrey, this is amazing!" He picked her up and she laughed.

"I'm so glad you're happy."

"How could I not be?"

"There's a lot going on."

"There is, but this… This is something _good_. I love you so much."

Her smile eased some of the tension as she kissed him and Ressler hoped that this was the first sign of things getting at least a little better.

* * *

 

 

TBC

Notes: Blacklist is back on tomorrow night, and I wanted to go ahead and post this tonight so that it wouldn't get lost in the craziness of coming off of hiatus. I'm super excited for tomorrow's episode, and I really hope that Jacob and Ressler end up in that shootout together. I need some canon bromance, or even just the inkling that it's possible. :P

 

So, a while back Evey Edge/Blacklister214 asked about the 'talisman' that either Liz or Jacob would have. It took me a while to decide what the mirror image of Jacob keeping the sonogram was going to be. It seemed fair that Liz needed to have it, as she's the one whose loyalties are in question here, and I knew I didn't want it to be the same thing. After chatting with a couple of people and bouncing ideas off of them, I settled on the videos. I'm really happy with that choice, as it's the only thing she took with her when she ran from the life she had with Jacob, not certain that she'd ever see him again. She took a reminder of a time that they had been truly happy. Reddington was in their life, but hadn't completely disrupted it yet. The idea of Jacob walking up and seeing that play out and _knowing_ that's what she took... I really like that idea. Poor guy, though. I don't envy him the position he's in.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

Berlin was a dog that had chewed through his leash. Impossible to control, angry, and vicious. He would just as soon bite the hand of his master as his enemy, not that Reddington thought the man could tell the difference any longer.

Things had dissolved quickly. Red had thought that finding the man that had helped Berlin's daughter escape would somehow ease the tensions. He had fed him the information he needed to find this Decembrist, but when it had led back to Alan Fitch, all hell broke loose.

The phone rang and rang in his ear, and he was about ready to hang up and start again when a sleepy sounding " _Phelps_?" stopped him.

"Agent Phelps, of all the times for you to decide to get some sleep," Reddington grumbled into the phone. "Wake up. This has to do with Elizabeth's safety."

" _What happened_?" Jacob demanded, his voice suddenly clearer than it had been. That did it.

"Berlin is on a tear looking for the man that helped his daughter escape. He was called the Decemberist."

" _Isn't that you? The guy that killed his daughter or whatever?" Jacob grumbled. "What does this have to do with Liz's safety_?"

"Everything, Jacob. Keep up. No, the Decembrist is a man named Alan Fitch."

" _The AD of National Intelligence_?"

"If Berlin gets to him there's a chance they'll try to pin it on Elizabeth. If they do that they will lock her away and throw away the key. You know that they will."

" _What makes you think I care if they do_?" the younger man growled.

"Because you were barely listening until I mentioned her name. If I like it or not, you two are connected. There is more danger out there for her. If they lock her away it will leave her vulnerable to people willing to kill her."

" _You're really dramatic, you know that_?" Reddington could hear him shuffling even as he said it and he snorted.

"I'd suggest you oversee it personally," he answered and ended the call. There were few things in this world entirely reliable, but Jacob Phelps' near self-destructive, single-focus was one of them, and heaven help them all, but that focus was on keeping Elizabeth safe.

* * *

It had taken some convincing to allow the task force a chance to be in the middle of Fitch's detail, but someone must have pulled strings somewhere and Jacob, and Ressler were on the detail while Samar and Meera followed up a lead to track Berlin himself.

"Special Agents Ressler and Phelps, sir," they were introduced.

Fitch turned and Jacob felt his gaze linger on him a moment longer than it did Ressler before he nodded. "Well, let's get going."

Jacob caught his partner's gaze briefly before they started forward, one on either side of the man as he climbed into the SUV. Ressler circled around to the front and Jacob took the back. As soon as he'd slipped in he found Fitch watching him with a small smirk. "The husband," he said, as if he'd been trying to place him.

"Excuse me?"

Fitch only gave him a knowing look and turned his gaze forward as the convoy started to move.

"We'll be taking you to a safe location. A black site," Ressler explained from upfront. "We have viable intel that a terrorist we've been looking for is after you."

"Son, I've had a lot of people want me dead over the years. You don't work on the level of the Intelligence Community as I do and not make a few enemies. What's so special about this one that they put a task force that few know about as my personal protection?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but until we reach the location, I'm afraid that's all I can tell you."

"What? You afraid the vehicle has ears? Or Luis?" Fitch asked, motioning to the driver. "I've known Luis for thirty years. He and Betty come over for dinner every other week. You can't say anything here that I'm worried will-"

Tires squealed ahead of them and the impact hit the driver's side of the car before any of them could register it. It hit hard enough to turn it on its side, jolting all four men inside and leaving them dangling upside down from their seat belts.

Jacob blinked hard, feeling the world around him pulse dangerously. "Sir? AD Fitch?"

The older man didn't respond, but he heard Ressler grunt from up front. "Jake, we have company. Can you get free?"

"Yeah," he answered, struggling out of the seat belt and dropping to the roof of the car. He felt blood trail down his face from a gash above it and he wiped it away as he went for his gun, shooting the first masked man that peeked inside. "AD Fitch, we need to get you out of here."

The older man mumbled incoherently as Jacob started working on the belt holding him in. "It's jammed, Ress. Can you buy us some time?"

"Work fast," Ressler growled, returning fire.

Jacob reached into his jacket and pulled a small knife out. "I'm cutting you free. We're going to have to make a run for it. Just stay low and with me. I'll get you out."

"Good at your job, aren't you?" Fitch mused. "Even with everything." He grunted as Jacob cut him loose.

The agent took a seat and kicked out, shattering the rest of the glass out of the window on his side of the car so they could get out.

"We're right next to an alleyway that looks clear," Ressler said from up front. "Let me know when and I'll give you cover."

Jacob looked back to Fitch who still looked dazed. He grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him forward shouting " _when_!" as he did.

The two men ducked low as Jacob's partner covered them. Bullets pinged close and Jacob felt one catch him deep enough in the thigh to lose his footing for half a step. That was all it took, though, and Fitch gave a sharp cry as Jacob pulled him around into the alley and further back until they were ducked behind a trash container. He knelt, ignoring the stingingly his own leg as best as he could while he peeled open Fitch's jacket. "They have you in a vest, right?" He demanded. "Should have-"

"Went right through," Fitch choked and Jacob could see the signs of blood gathering at his lips. He cursed lowly, starting in on the vest to try to get to the wound and apply pressure, but Fitch reached clumsily up. "You did all you could, kid. Whatever… whatever Ray told you to put you here today… He exaggerated."

"I don't know what you-"

"Cut the crap. Masha Rostova won't be blamed for this. Not the girl's fault. But-" He winced and coughed hard. "They know. Tell Ray they know. If he has it, now's the time to prove it. How good's your memory, kid? Can you remember a set of numbers?"

"Yeah," Jacob managed, not sure exactly what was happening.

Fitch snorted, though it might have been a laugh. "You're not so bad," he mused. "Just an idiot in love. Ray should get that." He closed his eyes and Jacob thought he had slipped when he spoke again. "Seven. Eight. Twelve. Thirty-six. Four thousand. Repeat it back."

"Seven. Eight. Twelve. Thirty-six. Four thousand. What is it?"

"Phone number. Tell Ray… Tell Ray I couldn't stop it. They know. Running won't save him now. Only proof."

Jacob swallowed hard. "Proof of what?" He didn't get an answer, though, as the man's eyes slipped shut. "No, no, no! You have to stay with me! What did you mean?"

"Jake?"

He turned, finding Ressler standing behind him and all at once the desperation washed out, leaving only the hollowness that had been threatening to take over. "He's gone."

"Ressler frowned. "We did everything we could. We'll find the leak that put the route out there."

Jacob stood slowly, and without warning lashed out, fist connecting with the brick wall. " _Dammit_! What the hell _is_ all of this?"

"What do you mean?"

"He knows Reddington. He gave me some sort of phone number for him. I don't know, saying that someone knows something and that Red can't run anymore."

Ressler was watching him carefully. "We'll talk with Cooper."

"He knew about Liz," Jacob managed, his voice soft and shaky.

"We'll figure it out. Come on, let's get that leg patched up."

"It's fine."

"It will be with stitches. Come on. We've done all we can here."

Jacob didn't shrug his friend off as Ressler slipped one of his arms around his shoulders, helping him out. His leg had started to ache as the adrenaline wore off, but the cut wasn't deep enough to worry too much over. Not as deep as all of this seemed to run, anyway. "We're in deeper than we know, aren't we?" he murmured, leaning on his friend.

"We may be," Ressler answered. "Come on, let's get you patched up."

* * *

His leg wasn't nearly as bad as Ressler was making it out to be. Jacob saw the EMT that was on site and caught a ride back to the Post Office. He was caught almost immediately at the door by Reddington who pulled him aside as if someone had dared to keep him out of the loop. Jacob sighed. "Alan Fitch is dead. The convoy was hit and we didn't get him out."

A surprisingly shaky breath left the older man. "Did he say anything?"

"A few. A lot that I didn't understand, but he left a phone number."

"Phone number? What was it?"

Jacob squared his shoulders. "You don't get all the information and give us none in return, Reddington. He said that you were running from someone. Who? What does this have to do with Liz?"

Something switched in Reddington and instead of impatience there was a dangerous flash in his eye as he moved as quickly as he had the morning at Ressler's cabin and shoved Jacob against the wall, speaking lowly in his ear. "Who else have you spoken to about this?"

"What the hell, man?"

" _Who_?" he hissed.

"Ressler. Ress was on the scene with me. I didn't give any of those details to anyone but him."

"No one outside of this task force is to hear what Fitch told you, do you understand me? What phone number-"

"You're a real ass, you know that?" Jacob growled, shoving the older man off of him. "You don't run this task force. You work with us, or at least you're supposed to. Something has you spooked, I get that, but we can't help you if-"

"You're right, Agent Phelps, you can't help me, and all that's going to happen if you keep trying to stick your nose deeper into it is you'll draw attention."

"So tell me, because you know I won't stop looking until I find out."

"How well did that work out with you with Elizabeth?"

Jacob bristled and Reddington shot him a smug look, knowing he'd won that particular round of verbal sparring.

"I still have information you need," Jacob said lowly. "Information that I can't know if I should give to you until I know why you need it so badly. I'm a lot of things, Reddington, but I'm still a fed. I have no problem bending rules if there's a reason behind them. You sent me racing into a situation this morning that may have gotten that man killed, all because you tossed Liz's safety out there like it was the easiest thing for you to use. She was never in any danger from this."

"These people that Fitch was referring to-"

"Who are they then, because until you give me a reason to trust you on this, you'll understand if my trust is running a little shallow lately."

The two men stood glaring at each other for several long moments before Reddington heaved a sigh. "Not here."

"You're not getting the phone number until I get the information," Jacob said firmly, glancing up and behind him. "Cooper, on the other hand, is about to get a full debrief. You want to stop that, you better be willing to shoot me."

* * *

Reddington didn't wait around for Cooper to pull him into their chat as well. He didn't have time for that. Berlin had killed Fitch and that could, potentially, lead down a very dangerous road when it came to the Cabal. First thing was first. He needed to get rid of Berlin. Once he'd done that Cooper would be forced to move on his promises in regards to Elizabeth. Reddington would know from there just where Harold stood. If he was with the Cabal, he'd never let the woman out of his sight, but Red was hesitant to believe that he was. Time would tell.

Berlin couldn't be left alive. He had gone too far and he seemed to be aware of that. He didn't fight it as Reddington sat with him and took shots of vodka until they had finished the bottle. The shots rang out and Reddington had left Mr Kaplan to clean up the mess he left behind and Dembe to call that idiot Phelps and set a meet.

That was how Red came to stand on the docks, watching the waves below and waiting for the man that had married Katarina Rostova's daughter. He heard footsteps and glanced back. "Is it true you can't swim, Agent Phelps?"

"Why? Are you planning to throw me over the rails?"

"I hadn't meant to, no, but there's a certain appeal to the idea."

"I'm still not going to give you that number until you-"

"What do you think you're doing here if not for information?" Reddington asked with a sigh. "I am aware how stubborn you are, and if Alan gave that number to you with his dying breath, I need it."

Jacob came to stand next to him by the railing. "Okay. Talk."

"Did you receive word about Berlin yet?"

"We found his body a couple of hours ago. I take it you had something to do with that? Not that there'll be any direct evidence to link back to you."

Reddington hummed softly, eyes scanning the waves. "He was hired, originally, by an organization with few fond feelings towards me."

"What organization?"

"First thing's first: Elizabeth."

Jacob's voice was tight as he spoke. "Cooper has set the process into motion. Apparently she wants to stay. She'll be used as a CI, just like you."

"But she'll be free?"

"Apparently that's the deal you two worked out. It'll take some time, but by the end of tomorrow she should walk."

"You disagree?"

"I don't know how I feel about it yet."

"That's quite fair," Reddington mused.

"I've given you that, now who are you running from?"

"This group that hired Berlin is an extremely powerful clandestine organization. If their activities were made public, some of the most powerful and influential men would go to prison or be executed."

"And you know who these people are?" Jacob asked, not sounding as if he entirely believed what Reddington was telling him.

"Some. There's a blackmail file that I took many years ago from them. It's kept me alive while simultaneously painting a target on my back. Some of them believe I still have it, some of them believe I've lost it."

"Do you have it?"

Reddington offered the younger man a lazy smile, but not an answer to his question. "Alan Fitch was one of my few remaining allies in that organization. If he was trying to get information to me, I do need that information to stay alive. If you'd like me to continue helping your team - if you would like me alive to do so - I need that phone number that he trusted you with."

Jacob snorted. "You seem to think I give a damn if you live or die."

"And you used to be a better liar. No wonder Berlin made you when you swooped in to save Elizabeth." He chuckled at the glare he received for the effort.

"What does all of this have to do with Liz?"

"She'll be caught up in it if I'm not careful. If I don't have the right protection. I took out the… insurance against this organization - this Cabal, we'll call it - when she was still in my life. They may try to use her to get to me, just as Berlin was ready to do."

"Fitch said they knew. He said that running won't save you now, only proof, and that they knew. What do they know?"

"They know about Elizabeth," Reddington sighed. "He'd kept her off their radar, but… I knew it wouldn't last. The number, Jacob. I've told you what you asked."

"Seven. Eight. Twelve. Thirty-six. Four thousand," he said quietly. "Those were the numbers he gave me. Are you… Are you going to take her away?"

"She should go. She'd be much safer with me and away from all of this. That was the original plan before… Well before she fell in love with you." His gaze traveled up and down. "You're very troublesome, Agent Phelps. Maybe I should just throw you in the water."

Jacob snorted and leaned against the railing. "Maybe so."

"I won't force her to leave. She doesn't know me anymore and there's no reason for her to trust me over you."

"You want me to tell her to leave?"

"I don't think you would. You're too stubborn and foolish enough to think that you can protect her from all of this."

"She's lied to me for years. I don't know what-"

"Don't be stupid. She's told you a few pieces of false information. That was her job. One that, according to her file, she was _quite_ good at before you. Did you know that she is the one that got the antidote from Zanetakos?"

"No."

"Of course you hadn't thought about that. You've spent so much time with the bureau that they've trained even someone like you to look at things in a black and white sort of manner. You are well aware that the world is rarely so clear cut." Reddington pushed himself off the railing. "Like right now. Drowning you would handle the issue with Elizabeth wanting to stay, but it would also make her incredibly sad, so I resist. Feel free to get yourself killed in any manner that won't be my fault, though. I'll leave you to your decisions to be made while I try to salvage some symbolance of safety should she choose to stay here." He left the younger man standing there, the day finally winding down into evening. It had been a long and hard day, and he had to make preparations in case Elizabeth chose to go, but first he had a call to make.

* * *

Jacob tossed his keys towards the bowl by the door and ignored how they slipped out the other side and tumbled to the floor. Hudson met him, less enthusiastic than he used to, but still pleased to see him. "As if things couldn't get more complicated," he grumbled to the dog as he moved silently to the kitchen, grabbed a beer, and back to flop on the couch.

He'd somehow managed not to utterly destroy the townhouse again after the first outburst. Kelly and Bruce had spent that night putting it back together to the best of their ability and he almost felt responsible to keep it that way. They called nightly, checking on him and often Kelly came over with food to make sure he ate. He was entirely aware what they were doing, but he couldn't quite bring himself to put a great deal of focus into what was supposed to be his personal life. Liz had been his life outside of work, and now even that was tainted.

A knock at the door caught his attention and Jacob loosed a sigh, pulling himself to his feet and seeing his partner on his doorstep. He opened the door and moved back to the couch without a word. "Hello to you too," Ressler greeted.

"It's been a really long day."

"It's been a really long couple of weeks." He moved in without any verbal invitation - not that he'd ever really needed one - and grabbed a drink before joining Jacob in the livingroom. "How're you doing?"

The younger man shrugged. "Can we talk about anything other than that?"

"Is Cooper giving you the option to transfer?"

Jacob's head jerked up and his gaze fell on his friend. "You don't want me on the team?"

"Woh. I didn't say that," Ressler answered defensively. "I just know that last I heard Liz - Rostova - was talking about staying on as a CI. I can't imagine that you-"

"I'm staying."

Ressler swallowed a gulp of his beer. "Stubborn."

"Yeah."

"Listen, she probably won't-"

"Cooper gave me some options," Jacob cut in, his gaze falling to the coffee table between them. "I know that they'll put her up in some safe house somewhere to keep an eye on her, but I think I'm going to offer to bring her home."

Ressler choked on his drink. "You're… what?"

"I'm going to offer to let her stay here."

"Okay, I think you've finally found your threshold for how many hours you can be conscious at once before you start babbling."

"I'm serious, Ress."

"Jake, she-"

"I know what she did. I know that I haven't had a chance to talk to her. Not _really_ talk to her, you know, without cameras and recordings, and everyone staring at us like we're some sort of spectacle." He took a long sip of his drink and set it on the table, forcing himself to look up, but his words were lost at the look that Ressler was giving him. It was complete and utter astonishment, like he'd lost his mind. "You told me you'd have my back."

"Yeah, but not in this."

"So, what? Having my back only stands when you agree with my decision?"

"Having your back means stopping you from going into full-on self-destruction mode," Ressler snapped, standing. "Jake, stop and _think_. A couple weeks ago I was picking you up off the floor after you ripped your living room apart and then just shut down. Your mom has been force feeding you. You're only sleeping when you completely crash. You know why, Jake? Because your life was ripped apart. I get that. I get that your world has been shattered and you're expected to keep going, but what I don't get is you suddenly wanting to turn back _into_ the mess-"

"I'm not turning back into it!" Jacob argued, matching his tone and standing as well. "I'm trying to figure out what the hell is going on!"

"She _lied_ to you, that's what. She _used_ you. That's not love, Jake, that's-"

"You have no idea what she feels or what she doesn't."

"Neither do you! You just _want_ her to love you back. I hate to break it to you, buddy, but it's _supposed_ to hurt when a woman breaks your heart. That's the one thing normal in all of this."

" _Nothing_ about this is _normal_ , Ress," Jacob snapped, taking an aggressive step around the table.

Ressler squared his shoulders. "Yeah, well diving head first back into it sure isn't. Listen, I know I'm not the one to give you emotional advice or anything-"

"You're really not," Jacob growled, straightening his back so that he was standing taller than the other man.

"Get out my face, Jake," Ressler answered. "This is stupid. You're impossible to talk to when you're like this."

"That's because you don't give a damn about what I have to say. It's my life. It's my marriage. You know, it must be easy to sit on your high horse with Audrey back. Must be easy to let the rest of us whose lives have gone to shit know just what we should be doing. If we'd just act like you-" he gave the other man a hard shove- "everything would work out."

"Jake, stop," the older man said tightly.

"Stop what? You want me to feel something? You want me to react? Fine. I'm pissed, Ressler. I'm pissed that you think you can come in here and offer your sage advice like you know what the hell could possibly be going on," he snapped, sarcasm rolling off each word. "That you, in your perfectly little world with _everything_ could-"

Ressler lashed out, his fist connecting hard with Jacob's jaw and everything broke loose. Half a second later they were both grappling, evenly matched as they threw punches at each other in Jacob's living room. Jacob pinned Ressler to the ground and Ressler threw him over backwards, rolling to his feet only to be knocked back to the ground and given a black eye for the effort. They struggled until they were both bruised and beaten and leaning against opposite sides of the room with only their ragged breathing filling the room.

"I just don't want her to get you killed," Ressler managed after a moment.

Jacob swallowed hard. "She's saved me. A couple times."

"According to Reddington?" Ressler asked sarcastically.

"He was right about Bouchard."

"Who worked for the same man as Liz!"

"She was telling me the truth, Ress. When I asked her when it became real? She wasn't lying."

"You can't know that."

"I can. I do. I don't want to believe it, but it's true." He sank hard to the wooden floor and crossed his legs, leaning heavily with his elbows against his knees. "I've done a lot of thinking, and everything - every moment, every situation that we've been through - it always leads me back to her. Everything comes back to her, Ress. I want to hate her for what she did. I don't trust her, but I do love her. How am I supposed to balance that?" He looked up as his beer appeared in front of him and he took it, Ressler taking a seat next to him.

"I don't know," the older man said softly.

"The only thing I know to do is to talk to her. To figure it out. I know that if I don't, if I just… if I run, I'll always regret it." He'd spent enough time running that if he knew anything, he knew that he didn't want to run from Liz. Not until he knew the truth.

Ressler remained silent for a long moment, sitting and drinking with him, until Jacob loosed a long breath. "Sorry."

"Me too."

"What'd you come over for anyway?"

That pulled a rough chuckle out of the other man and he stretched his legs out in front of him. "I came to ask you something. It's kind of important."

"Well, if you were going to ask me to be your best man at your wedding, you may want to find someone that doesn't mistake you for a punching bag."

Ressler snorted. "No way. You accepted the first time Audrey and I were engaged. You're not slipping out of it this time. Not when it's really happening."

"Fair," Jacob murmured, a small smile finally tilting his lips. "What were you going to ask?"

"I was going to ask if… if you'd be my son's godfather."

"Son's…" He stopped, staring at his friend. "Audrey's pregnant?"

"Yeah."

A laugh, the first real sign of any happiness in some time, escaped him. "That's amazing. Congratulations, man."

Ressler chuckled. "Yeah, well, you get to explain why I'm coming home with a black eye tonight."

"I'll be lucky if Audrey doesn't give me a matching one."

"You've got a shiner started already," Ressler pointed out and the younger man shook his head.

"I have to do this, Ress. She… She's the only woman I've ever loved. If there's nothing of Liz there, what does that say about me?"

"I don't know."

"Sage wisdom, right there," Jacob chuckled mirthlessly.

"Yeah. Have you told your folks yet?"

"No. I just made the decision tonight."

Ressler pulled in a deep breath. "I'll do my best to back you, Jake. I don't like it. I think you're crazy for doing it, but I'll be there to back you."

A small smile pulled his lips. "Thanks."

"You'd do the same for me."

"Let's hope Audrey's not some secret operative, okay?"

"That would be…"

"Terrible. Let's just leave it at terrible."

Ressler chuckled, leaning back so that his head thunked lightly against the wall. He looked as exhausted as Jacob felt. "Any other surprises you want to tell me about?"

"I kind of get the idea they're about to start rolling out daily," Jacob managed. He closed his eyes and sighed. "I talked to Reddington today about that phone number that Fitch left?" Had that really been that morning? It was hard to believe.

"You gave it to him?"

"I did. He's… running from some organization. I don't know what exactly. He tends to tell his stories to get what he wants out of people." Ressler snorted and Jacob managed a glare in his direction. "Shut up."

"Didn't say it."

"He knows I'll do what I have to to protect her. I think that's why he told me about them."

"You think this organization is after Liz too?"

Jacob shrugged. "Sounded like it."

"We'll protect her, Jake. She's going to be working with us, so-"

"That's just it. Red said that the organization is made of of people in high government positions. It sounded like they could be anyone."

"No specifics though?"

"It's Reddington."

"Yeah," Ressler sighed. "What does your BS detector say?"

A small smile tugged at his lips. Well, at least his partner was acting like he was going to trust his judgement again. "That he's not telling me everything. Shocker. Listen, as much as I want to keep going over this, I need some sleep. Tell Audrey congrats for me, okay?"

"Yeah. I'll tell her you said yes too, you know, after you punched me."

"You had it coming."

"I think the wall would have had it coming with the way you've been. Get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

Jacob nodded, watching his friend set what was left of his beer down on the coffee table and leaving without another word. He stayed on the floor for a long moment until Hudson came over and leaned up against him. "You're mom's coming home tomorrow," he promised softly. It had to be the right decision, because he wasn't sure he was capable of making another one.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well that chapter turned into a rather long one. Over 5K. Ah well, everything needed to be in there :)

I'm still kind of on a Tessler high from Thursday's episode. I'm absurdly excited! As long as they keep on that path, those two may actually start to become fond of each other. I mean, I still expect those wonderful one liners that they gave us. "Did you even go to the academy?!" Oh Jacob. How I love him.

I also have a set one Tessler canon-based one shots started under the title Changing the Dynamic if anyone's interested. I don't know how often those will be updated, but I already have a request for the second chapter, so I do plan to continue them.

Next time - Ressler and Liz have a chat, Jacob takes her home, and the Phelps' do what they can to pick up the pieces of their lives.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

She hadn't expected Donald Ressler in her holding cell the day she was supposed to be released, but there he stood in his pressed suit and gelled hair, looking every bit the fed that he was. Liz should hate him, she knew. Everything about him was in opposition to everything that she was, but still, somehow, he was just Don. Her husband's best friend and partner that always had his back. That's what he was doing there, she knew. That's what he _thought_ he was doing there.

The door closed behind him and he squared his shoulders. She frowned a little at the black eye he was sporting. "Catch the wrong end of your case?"

"Your husband's temper, actually," he answered gruffly.

Liz winced a little, wondering what could have put the two men at odds. He'd barely said more to her since she had been arrested than Jacob had. He had avoided her better than she might have expected, just as everyone else had, but what that had left unsaid was starting to get under her skin. "Just go ahead and say whatever it is you came here to say."

He huffed a little, turning his icy glare on her. "You really did a number on him. I didn't think it could get worse than the adoption, but you managed. If I had my way, they would toss you in a hole somewhere and forget you." Ressler shook his head, voice and expression tight. "But they didn't. You've been granted the deal Reddington was trying to make for you, so I have to figure out a way to work with you now."

"I'm no worse than Reddington," Liz murmured in her own defense.

"That's where you're wrong. You're in a whole different level, and I swear to you, if you hurt Jake again-"

"He's staying?" She hadn't meant to sound so relieved. She had barely seen Jacob since the morning he'd spoken to her in the box. She had seen him with the rest of his team, but that might as well have been as if she hadn't seen him at all.

"Yeah. He's staying," Ressler answered. "And you're free to go. You'll be expected to be here first thing in the morning. Don't expect Reddington's leisurely schedule."

She nodded slowly, moving to exit, but he caught her gaze, stopping her in her tracks. "I really hope that there's something in you of the woman Jake loves."

Liz held his glare for a long moment before she brushed past him, feeling the indecision roll off of him in waves. She imagined that if anyone has gotten a glimpse of what this had done to her husband, it was Donald Ressler, and while she wouldn't admit it to him, she worried that perhaps it had done even more than she realized with the way the ginger agent was protecting his partner now. She couldn't change that, though. She couldn't turn back time. All she could do, if he would let her, was try to explain.

Ressler escorted her out and to the lift where she had expected an agent to be waiting. Maybe even Reddington, but she certainly hadn't expected Jacob.

Her husband stood stiffly by the lift door, dressed in his usual office attire of slacks and a coat, tie pulled loose and he was watching her carefully. He sported a black eye much like Ressler's and she had to wonder what had set him off on the one person he really trusted.

She stopped when she reached him, swallowing hard. "Hi."

"You've got a choice," he said, his voice flat. "The bureau is willing to put you up in a motel not far from here with around the clock surveillance."

"Or?"

He blinked hard and set his jaw, both tiny signs of agitation getting the better of him. "Or you can come home and I'll be responsible for you."

Of all the things she had thought might happen, she hadn't expected that one. Liz stared at him and he met her gaze. "With you?" she managed. He gave a stiff nod and she returned it. "I'd prefer that."

"You get one chance," her husband said, voice completely void of emotion. "You screw up, and all the deals Reddington set up for you are null and void. You even look like you're going to run and you'll spend the rest of your life in that box."

"I get it."

She watched him glance behind her to where Ressler was standing and he closed his eyes, as if he were steadying himself. "Then let's go."

Liz followed him into the lift and to the garage. He didn't say another word to her as they climbed in and left the Post Office, driving towards home.

* * *

He couldn't get a read on her, but that might have simply been him second guessing his own skills. After everything, that wasn't a surprise.

She didn't push him to talk, but immediately greeted Hudson like she would have any other day. His tail was going like crazy and he barked, looking over to Jacob like he expected something. "He's missed you," he managed. Poor guy hadn't understood what was happening, though Jacob envied him for it sometimes. "There are some leftovers in the fridge. They took some of your things when they were starting the investigation, but your clothes are pretty much intact. I'll take the couch-"

"Why should you have to take the couch?" she asked, her gaze focused in on him. "It's going to kill your back."

"Why do you care?" he snapped, regretting it as soon as the words left his mouth. He'd been the one to offer this. He had extended a chance to… What? Reconcile? Now that they stood in the hallway of the home they had bought together he wasn't sure what he had expected. He had just hoped it was the right call.

Liz pulled back very slightly. "I do," she answered after a moment. "I know you don't have any reason to believe me, but… But I do." She was looking at her shoes, like she was either unable or unwilling to meet his gaze.

"Then tell me something real, Liz, because I don't know what is anymore," Jacob answered her. "I worked… so hard to be honest with you. Because you asked. Because you were one of the few people I knew that I thought _deserved_ that effort. I told you things that could land me in a lot of trouble at work, and you didn't just betray that trust, you…" He closed his eyes, running his hand through his hair. "You destroyed it."

"I know," his wife whispered. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Jacob. It was never supposed to turn out this way."

"What? Me finding out?"

"Yes." The word was small as it left her lips and it caused him to turn his gaze back on her, surprised at the admission. "Don't look at me like that. Please. It's not as bad as it sounds. I've… I've moved in and out of different roles since I graduated from the Major's school. I've worked every angle to get what I needed on assignment and never had a problem getting attached. I never dreamt you'd be any different."

Jacob snorted. "You're not winning points right now," he snarked, starting into the kitchen to put something together to eat.

"You want me to be honest or not?" Liz snapped in return and he motioned for her to keep going. "I got to know you. I… You were different than anyone else I'd ever known, and I did fall for you, Jacob. I didn't mean to, but I did."

"What would have happened if you hadn't?"

"Best case, I would have gotten what I needed and then would have disappeared."

"Worst case?"

She winced. "I would have killed you."

"You had to have known this wouldn't last forever, Liz. Either the assignment would have wrapped up or I would find out."

"Or both. At the same time," she answered flatly.

"Or both," he agreed, though some of the bite had left his voice. He watched as she moved to one of the seats at the bar and took a heavy seat, watching him put the leftovers that Kelly had dropped off together as two sandwiches. "You're not stupid. What did you think you were going to do?"

"I don't know. I kept… telling myself I had time to figure it out. I just wanted to enjoy what we had. I'd never had that before."

"I hadn't either, but you knew that."

"I thought I could figure out a way to keep things the way they were and not to hurt you."

"That's stupid."

"I know." She sighed heavily. "Ask me anything. I'll tell you whatever you want to know."

Jacob handed her plate over and grabbed a bottle of wine from the pantry. It probably wasn't a smart move, necessarily, but he had a feeling it would help. He poured two glasses and took a seat next to her at the bar. "I've been reading your file. Orphaned at four, picked up by the Major at ten, and you just said you moved in and out of personas after that. What's different about now?" He needed to know why he was supposed to trust that it was. He needed to make sure that the surprise that had been finding out about her wasn't repeated.

"I don't know what's different about you, just that you are."

She was staring at her sandwich, but hadn't taken a bite yet. Jacob shifted in his seat. "Your smile."

That caught her attention. "What?"

"That was one of the first things I fell in love with. And your laugh. It was like… like you hadn't laughed like that in a long time."

"I hadn't."

"That was real?"

"Yeah. It was something… I don't even remember what it was you said anymore. I just remember thinking that if the assignment ran long, I wouldn't mind it."

"You used your real name."

"I used the name social services gave me. It was clean, so I used it." She looked over to him. "I'm glad I did. Everyone in Bud's organization calls me by a name that links me to a woman I don't know. It helped I'm that line of business, but it always felt like another alias to me. _Lizzie_ always felt real."

Jacob finally took a bite of his sandwich. "Why did you kill Jolene Parker?"

"She was supposed to be my replacement. She said Berlin didn't think I could kill you in the end."

"Could you have?"

"I didn't, did I?"

"That's not what I asked."

"And I told you I'd be honest. I only know what I did do. I would never want to hurt you. I could… I don't think I could ever live with myself if I got you killed. I thought I had when Gina showed up. I thought that by trying to balance it all to keep Berlin happy so I could stay close, I was the reason you were poisoned. In a way I was."

"Reddington said you got the antidote." She gave a wordless nod. "Thank you."

His wife looked over, startled and he shrugged. "I don't know what's about to happen, Liz. I don't know if I _can_ trust you again."

"What happens if you can't?"

"I don't know. I guess I transfer out of my task force."

"I don't want to do that to you."

"Then prove it to me, Lizzie," Jacob said, his voice breaking a little under the weight of the words. "Prove to me it wasn't all a lie."

She didn't move from her spot, and she didn't say anything for several long moments. Finally she nodded slowly, as if she didn't trust her voice.

They sat there and ate in silence. Jacob still wasn't sure what to expect, and he didn't think that he would know it until it hit, but at least they were trying. That had to be worth something.

* * *

She hadn't been able to convince him that she didn't want the bed, but it wasn't like it was doing her any good anyway. Liz had tossed and turned until after midnight when Hudson woke up and jumped from the bed like a dog on a mission. She waited a moment before finally tossing the covers off and following him down the stairs.

The townhouse felt darker than it usually did, almost like she was a stranger in her own home. Liz squinted against the shadows to see Hudson lying on the living room floor next to the couch that Jacob was sleeping on, long legs curled around to fit.

As she inched closer she could see the way his face was screwed up and his brows drawn together like he was fighting some invisible battle and losing, from the looks of it. She had seen the expression enough times since they were married, and the small, pained sound that escaped him was just the next step to the nightmare. Carefully Liz eased forward and knelt down next to the couch, reaching out and her fingers hovered just shy of touching him. They had been through the ritual so many times that she knew she needed to wake him up before it got too bad, but part of her didn't want to see the look he'd given her the evening before. It was the one that alternated between looking at her like he didn't know her at all and that she was the one that, in all the pains he had lived through, had hurt him the most. Liz pulled in a deep breath and readied herself for it as she reached forward, her fingers lightly touching his face. "Jacob? Hey, you need to wake up," she coaxed softly.

Blue eyes snapped open and he jolted halfway to sitting. Liz sat back hard, avoiding getting hit as he startled awake, gaze sweeping the room as if he were looking for the enemy he had just been fighting. His breathing was hitched and she sat there waiting until he finally looked at her. "Lizzie."

The nickname that he had used most of their relationship pulled a hesitant smile from her. "You were having a nightmare."

"How long have you been there?" he asked, blinking the sleep from his eyes.

"Just a minute. I was trying to wake you up without startling you."

He snorted, but a very small smile accompanied it. "Tough even on the best days."

"You want to talk about it?" she offered.

He winced a little. "Not really."

They say there in silence for a few minutes, neither of them quite ready or sure of what to say. Finally he sighed heavily, drawing her attention. "You'd think I would have had enough time to figure out how I felt about this, and I thought I sort of had, but then I saw you walking down the hall of the Post Office and I was right back to square one." She watched him carefully and he swallowed hard. "I should hate you, Liz. You… Do you even understand what you did?"

"I'm not an idiot, Jacob," she answered tightly. "I know how you are." She'd told him that she was sorry. She had told him why she did what she did, even if it had been desperately foolish to think that it would ever work. He knew, so she bit her tongue and let him speak. He always had taken a bit longer than most to work through his own emotions.

He looked down, avoiding her eyes. "So why can't I hate you?" he whispered, and she heard his voice break with the honesty of the question.

Liz reached forward on impulse, her hand covering his. "It wasn't all a lie, Jacob. Do you know that?"

"I don't know if I believe it."

"Will you let me try to prove it?"

He blinked, looking up at her. "How?"

"I don't know yet. I just… I want to find a way. I love you."

She could see him struggling. He was always so good about putting in whatever face he wanted the world to see, but he had always had trouble doing it with her. She was different, he had told her time and again. He didn't want to lie to her and didn't want to try to play a part with her. He felt like he had to now, she knew, because he was protecting himself. She didn't blame him for it, but she hated it.

Finally, when he didn't answer, she started to stand, but he caught her wrist, his grip gentle next to the way he had held on when he had confronted her about everything. She turned back to see the torn expression finally breaking through and she squeezed his hand. "You always ask me what I need," she said softly, willing herself to tell him something deep and true. "No one but you ever has. You make me feel like… like I'm loved, even if I don't deserve it."

"We're not that different, are we?" he murmured.

She offered him a smile and leaned forward, risking a chance to press a kiss to his forehead. "You got a chance with Kelly and Bruce. I survived with Bud. That's… just the way it is."

"I've barely slept since you walked out," he confessed softly.

"Maybe we're not so different." She took a step, testing to see if he would let go of her hand. The offer was there, even if she wasn't pushing it, and after a beat of hesitation he followed. They didn't talk as the made their way up the stairs and crawled under the covers. He didn't move close, but he didn't pull away either, and that had to count for something. Small steps, she reminded herself as she finally drifted to sleep with him next to her.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, the last chapter was very long and this one was a bit shorter. I suppose it all evens out. I have to admit, I love how protective Ressler gets over the situation. Don't mess with this man's friends. Ever. :P

Next time - Two new faces show up in the Post Office and the team is given the task of tracking down a senator's potentially kidnapped daughter. Liz tries to find her place on her husband's team, Jacob and Ressler go to Capitol Hill, and Reddington tries to find common ground with Elizabeth.


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

If the addition of Elizabeth Phelps - Masha Rostova, Ressler reminded himself firmly - weren't strange enough for their team, other odd and subtle changes seemed to be taking place. Reven Wright, Diane Fowler's replacement as the Head of the Criminal Division, was a more consistent presence at the Post a Office, often taking meetings with Cooper that would last hours. If it had just been her, Ressler might not have felt as uncomfortable with it. With Reddington's wishes being pandered to with Rostova, it _should_ have made heads turn. It was the fact that she wasn't the only new face that appeared that set the agent on edge. With her came a man that Cooper seemed to know personally, but hadn't introduced directly to the team. There was something about him that didn't set right, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

"He's a politician," Jacob said, startling Ressler out of his thoughts.

"Who?"

"Connolly. Cooper's friend. He's the Assistant Attorney General, looking for a promotion to AG."

"I wouldn't trust him if you can't see him," Meera agreed. "Even then it's iffy."

"I'd just like to know if there's about to be a change in power structure here," Ressler grumbled, turning back to his team. "It doesn't help to be guessing."

"Have we heard from Reddington?" Samar asked.

"He's been quieter than usual."

"Of course he has. He has what he wants." The Persian woman glanced over to where Liz was sorting through files that she had indicated she knew something about.

Jacob snorted, but didn't get a chance to say what was on his mind as Cooper's door opened and the Assistant Director started down the stairs with Reven Wright and Tom Connolly with him. "Aram, I just sent you a file down. If you could pull it up?"

Aram gave a brief nod and a young woman's photo appeared on the screen. She was smiling, with pale skin and red hair, and Liz came to stand with them. Ressler's mood soured immediately. She had been there every day for nearly a week and had held up her end of the bargain so far, but he still wasn't comfortable with it. He wondered if he would ever be after seeing what it had done to his friend. He didn't know what would happen if this fell through somehow, or if Jake could take another round of it. It was like setting themselves up for the worst fall they could have.

"This is Patricia McDurren, twenty years old, and a student at Georgetown. She's the daughter of Mitch McDurren-"

"The senator?" Samar asked, her gaze flickering to Connolly.

"A personal friend of mine," the assistant AG answered. "I asked for the best to be put on it and Harold assures me that this team is just that."

"Exactly what is the case?" Ressler pressed.

"Ms McDurren has gone missing," Cooper said.

"Missing as in kidnapped or missing as in she's twenty years old and doesn't want her dad to know where she's gone?" Jacob popped off, receiving a slight glare from their boss. "What? Seriously, it's a valid question."

Cooper sighed heavily. "Navabi and Malik, you two will be following up with roommates and friends on campus. Aram, I'll need you looking through her social sites for anything there. Ressler and Phelps, you'll go with Tom to speak to Senator McDurren. And Phelps?"

Jacob turned. "Sir?" he asked innocently, chuckling a little when Cooper rolled his eyes and shook his head. He turned to Ressler with a smirk. "Don't be myself, huh?"

"Yeah, your personality doesn't mesh well with politicians," Ressler agreed with a short chuckle. His partner's smile wasn't entirely put on, which helped to ease his own mood at least a little. "Better than tossing you in the middle of a college though."

"What? I was a saint in undergrad."

Ressler snorted. "You're usually a better liar than that."

Jacob shot him a look that was somewhere between entertained and offended.

"Agent Cooper, where would you like me?" Liz called as the assistant director turned to start back up the stairs.

Cooper turned. "I'm sure you can help Agent Mojtabai with his search."

"I'm really more of a-"

The assistant director didn't pause again, but started up the stairs and Liz's expression darkened. "He's just going to stick me in a corner and let me rot of boredom, isn't he?" she grumbled.

"It's about earning trust," Jacob told her, his expression softening a little.

"How am I supposed to do that if he won't put me in the field?"

"By doing what he tells you to," Ressler answered. He looked over to Connolly. "Sir, the sooner we can meet with the senator the better. If this is a kidnapping case, we may be working against the clock."

"Of course. I'll give him a call to let him know you're on your way over."

"Thank you."

Jacob risked a glance at him as Connolly started for the exit. "I do not trust that man."

"Neither do I."

* * *

"So how's it going?"

It had been close to a week and Jacob was surprised that Ressler had lasted this long. His friend had kept his mouth shut, doing his damndest to keep his opinions to himself and let Jacob come to him if he needed anything in it all. In return, Jacob hadn't forced him any closer to the situation than he already was. Now, though, they were in the vehicle together and it looked like it was sharing time. "It's weird," Jacob answered after a moment of thought, doing his best to be honest with his friend. "One second it's like nothing's changed. We're dancing around each other and getting ready for work in the morning and trying to remember whose turn it is to take Hudson out, then the next she's telling me some story from her childhood or just breaks into talking about a case."

"Shatters the illusion, huh?" Jacob's lips twitched downward and Ressler shrugged from the driver's seat. "I'm not trying to judge you. I get it, but you've got to be careful. It's easy to pretend nothing is wrong. Maybe easier than actually facing it."

"We're facing it." He sighed, turning his gaze to the passing city.

Ressler snorted. "I've known you a lot of years, Jake. If it's something you can fight, you go after it with everything you have, but if it's something like this-"

"Like what?" Jacob grumbled, cutting his friend off. "Because I'm pretty sure there's no precedent. If you find one, let me know." Ressler was trying to help, part of him knew that, but the other part was on the defensive. He huffed a sigh and ran a hand through his hair, slouching in the seat. "Just give me two hours during the day that I don't have to think about it, would you? I'm sharing my home with a woman that looks, sounds, and may or may not be the woman I love. A week's not long enough to know."

Ressler nodded from his seat. "That's fair. Even if I had you pegged in a week."

Jacob glanced over to see the smirk on his partner's face and he made a show of rolling his eyes. "You _still_ haven't gotten me pegged."

"Keep telling yourself that, pal. I'll admit, there aren't a lot of people that know you past what you want them to, but I do."

"It's because I trust you," the younger man admitted softly as Ressler pulled the SUV around and parked off the street.

"I know," Ressler answered, all joking lost from his voice.

Jacob shrugged and opened the door. "You've earned it. Hell, Ress, you're not the easiest person to earn the trust of either."

His partner smirked. "Do me a favour and don't aggravate the senator?

"Hadn't planned on it," Jacob answered innocently.

Ressler rolled his eyes and they both started into the building, flashing badges just about the time that a young woman in a business suit round the corner. "Agents Ressler and Phelps? Senator McDurren has cleared his schedule for you. If you'll follow me?"

The two agents exchanged looks and did as was asked, following her back into the office spaces. Jacob had met with politicians before, and Ressler had plenty of reason to tell him to behave. Even after everything he thought his BS meter was pretty well intact, and he'd never failed to meet one that didn't set it off. They smiled at all the right times and said all the right words.

Tom Connolly looked up as they entered and Jacob thought he was the epitome of them all.

"You two take a while."

"Traffic jam," Ressler answered, turning his attention to the man behind the desk. "Senator McDurren-"

"Tom has told me that your task force is one of the best in the bureau. I hope he's right."

"Can you tell us when your daughter went missing?"

Jacob watched the senator as he spoke, telling them about his perfect little girl. She was a student with excellent grades and focus. She was pre-law, didn't party, only associated with quality people, as he put it. She volunteered. Jacob had never met such a perfect college student, and while he was sure they probably existed somewhere, he was pretty sure the senator was either lying through his teeth or was oblivious to the mask his own daughter wore for him. Either way, the man was holding something back. He just wasn't sure what yet.

"It's not at all possible that she's gone away for a long weekend and didn't tell you?" Ressler pressed.

"No," McDurren answered immediately.

Ressler glanced over and Jacob shifted. "Any enemies we should be looking into for you, sir?"

"No. Not that I'm aware of."

"We'll be in touch if we have further questions," Ressler added. "If you receive anything at all-"

"You gentlemen will be the first to know," the senator assured them.

Connolly stood, following them out. "Agent Phelps, if I might have a word?"

Jacob paused, turning to find the older man uncomfortably close, and with the way he lowered his voice he was certain that he was avoiding Ressler. "I don't mean to pry, but since I was cleared for everything pertaining to your task force, I've been overrun with information. Your wife is Masha Rostova, isn't she? Quite a recent blow up in-"

"Your point?" Jacob snapped, Connolly pulling back as if he'd startled him.

"Simply curious. It seems like between her and your other resource-"

"You talk a lot for having that kind of clearance," the younger man said sharply. "If you'll excuse us, Ressler and I have your buddy's kid to find." He turned, not giving Connolly the chance to say more, and started for his partner.

"What was that?" Ressler asked as they made their way out to the vehicle.

"A really bad attempt to fish for information. Meera was right. I wouldn't trust him any further than I can see him."

"And McDurren?"

"Either hiding something or blind. My money's on the first."

Ressler smirked and climbed into the driver's seat. "Good to know I wasn't the only one getting that."

"I just hope that whatever it is doesn't end up screwing us in the end."

Ressler snorted. "We can hope."

* * *

"Tom Connolly is a snake in the grass. I was only gone a few days. How did he manage to worm his way in?"

Liz offered him a glare by way of response before turning her attention back to Aram. "This girl just doesn't have a lot to her profiles. Most girls her age should have pictures of friends, a boyfriend, something. There's the occasional post and not one photo that doesn't look staged."

Aram was still going through the missing girl's laptop that had been delivered. "She has layers in here. They're not sophisticated, but they would be enough to fool someone without a lot of knowledge with computers. It's more sorting through what's important and what's not." He turned back to the man that Liz had been very purposefully ignoring. "Did you have something you needed from us, Mr Reddington?"

"Oh no. I'm just here for Ms Phelps when she has a moment."

"It's _Ms Phelps_ again, is it?" Liz grumbled. "It seems to change depending on your mood." Or hers. He did seem to revert to the formality when she was particularly put out with him.

"If there's something you'd rather I call you, say the word. Would Elizabeth be better? Lizzie?"

"Absolutely not," she answered.

"Elizabeth then," Reddington said cheerfully.

"Don't act like we're friends," she growled at him. "You come in with a few cryptic remarks about my mother, disappear, reappear to rip my life apart some more, and then-"

"And then I work a deal with the FBI that allows you to stay where you want to be."

She frowned. "You won't give me answers." She looked over to see Aram was working hard on his project and wasn't paying attention, but she lowered her voice anyway. "My husband still thinks I'm lying to him because I can't tell him how you know me."

"I've told you. I knew your mother."

"But how?"

"Have you ever thought perhaps your husband thinks you're still lying to him because that's all you've ever done in the course of your relationship?"

She glowered at him and opened her mouth to unleash, but his gaze flickered behind her. "Agent Navabi, Agent Malik, might I say that you ladies look absolutely lovely today?"

Meera Malik raised an eyebrow. "What do you want, Reddington?"

"What makes you think I want something?"

"That look you're wearing for starters," Samar said, a smirk playing on her full lips. "Aram, what do you have for us?"

Aram looked up and if Samar couldn't see the stars in his eyes when he looked at her, she must have been blind. "Ms McDurren is careful how she leaves her footprint on the web. She's had someone with at least a base knowledge hide a few things on here, but it looks like she's been in communication with a Maddox and Carrie Ann Beck from a movement that has been classified as an Eco-terrorist group."

"Well that explains her dad's reluctance to give the full story," Jacob said as he and Ressler joined the team. "That might put a dent in daddy's career to have his daughter linked to an Eco-terrorist organization."

"Well that explains her dad's reluctance to give the full story," Jacob said as he and Ressler joined the team. "That might put a dent in daddy's career to have his daughter linked to an Eco-terrorist organization."

"I was about to start the rundown on information we have. It'll take a couple of minutes."

"Maddox and Carrie Ann Beck?" Ressler asked. "Weren't they killed in an attempted bombing?"

"They would have you believe that," Reddington answered from his place. "They took their work underground. Even if you can find them and obtain a warrant, you may have difficulty in getting anyone from their organization to speak to you," Reddington mused.

"You know him?" Ressler asked.

"I've followed his work before. You said this is Mitch McDurren's daughter?"

"If he won't talk to the feds, just send someone in undercover." All eyes turned on Liz and she squared her shoulders. "What? Don't you dare tell me people don't do that."

"Not everything can be handled with a lie," Ressler all but growled at her.

"She has a point," Meera murmured. "If we continue to poke around or even alert Beck that we are, he's more likely to shut us out. If we send someone in as someone interested in joining, they're much more likely to get the information from him quietly as the senator-"

"Since when do we pander to politicians?" Jacob asked. "Our job is to protect the girl, not his career."

"I know you don't trust Connolly, and I'm right there with you, but Meera's right," Ressler piped up. He looked towards the CIA officer that was a part of their team. "How do you feel about going under cover with Jake?"

"I think it's been a while, but I'm game. I'll have to get ahold of the kids' dad to have him watch them for a few days if we're going to be gone, but I never have to twist his arm." She glanced over to the monitors where Aram had brought up some information and grumbled, "Good father, terrible husband."

"Why not use Elizabeth?" Reddington offered.

"I _am_ trained for deep cover work," she pointed out. "Cooper agreed to have me work with all of you. Use me."

"I don't trust you," Ressler told her bluntly. "And two are enough. Any more will raise suspicion."

Liz bristled a little, but didn't argue again. She tried to catch Jacob's gaze, but he was intentionally avoiding it as he looked over to Meera and grinned. "I've always been kind of curious how the CIA differs in undercover training."

She smirked. "Rumour has it that we tried to snag you out of school and you went to Quantico instead."

Jacob shrugged. "My mom wanted me to stay close to home."

"So he joined my task force and traveled the world," Ressler chuckled.

"Well, things work out the way they do," Jacob answered, his smile nearly a grin now.

Liz watched the banter from her place, feeling very shut out. She had stayed and chosen to join their team to be close to the man she loved, but in moments like those she never felt further from him. This was his world. He had made it his, somehow.

"They'll come around."

She looked over to see Aram Mojtabai looking up from his computer chair, an absurdly honest look in his eyes. "I'm sorry?"

"Agent Ressler and the rest of them. They'll come around. You just have to give them time. They'll see how much of an asset you can be. You've been a huge help to me today."

Liz snorted. "I looked through a few files."

"It needed to be done. They're just…" He glanced over, as if to see if he was being listened to or not and found the others distracted. "We're _all_ a little protective here. They won't admit it, but it's like a family. We watch each other's backs and protect each other. Agent Navabi is still pretty new. She puts on a good act of being confident, but you should have seen she and Agent Phelps go at it when she first showed up. There's a history with you and some of the people here. When they see you're being honest, they'll help protect you too."

Blue eyes stared unblinking for a moment before Liz loosed a long breath. "You see more than they ever know, don't you?"

He grinned. "Oh, I'm sure they know. I'm just the only one that'll admit it."

She shook her head. "Thanks, Aram."

"No problem," he answered, ducking his head a little awkwardly under the gratitude. Well, at least she had one person on her side besides Reddington and all of her unanswered questions.

* * *

Jacob woke that night to find the spot next to him empty. It took his mind a moment to remember if it should have been or not. After waking on the couch that first night she was back, they had shared the bed. There was no closeness in it, but at least he didn't feel like he had to sleep with one eye open either. They were taking small steps where they could, even if it felt like they were so tiny that they were barely moving at all. Kelly had reminded him that rushing it wouldn't do either of them any good. He was getting to know his wife all over again. These things took time.

Liz was nowhere to be seen, though, and Jacob grabbed for his glasses as he pulled himself out of bed and started down the stairs. He found her sitting on the couch with a box on the coffee table in front of her. She was staring at it, her hands wrapped around a mug balanced against her lap, but she looked over when a stair gave him away by creaking under him. "Hey," she greeted softly. "I was trying not to wake you."

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked.

"No. Sometimes my mind just won't shut down for the night."

Jacob smirked a little. "I know," he offered, and paused.

"You're not interrupting or anything," she said after a moment. "I could use the company."

He nodded slowly and crossed over into the living room, taking a careful seat next to her. "What's in the box?"

"A few things from when I was a kid."

"Oh yeah. They tried to take those."

"I'm surprised they didn't."

"Well, I didn't think that a stuffed bunny and a few nicknacks were going to make or break the case," he murmured.

Liz reached into the box and took the bunny from it. "This is the only thing I have from my life before," she whispered, fingering the burnt toy. "I had it with me when social services picked me up. Bud tried to make me get rid of it, but I hid it away. I used to hold onto it whenever I'd go to a new home and pretend that even though I couldn't remember my family, they could remember me and they'd come rescue me."

Jacob sat quietly, listening to her speak. He knew the look she wore, though he wasn't sure he'd ever seen her wear it. It was one he'd seen all through the foster system growing up. A hope that kept some people going, even if they knew it was farfetched. "I never had that," he said quietly. "I guess I remembered enough about my biological family that I didn't _want_ them coming back for me."

"Bud told me my mother left me to burn, but have you seen the way Reddington looks when he talks about her? I know he's probably not the best source to go off of, but he's all I have. I don't know anything about her. Not really. She was Russian? I guess? She worked for the KGB."

"From what I understand," Jacob said carefully. He'd yelled at her two days before, frustrated that she wouldn't tell him anything more about her connection with Red. Now, in the middle of the night as they sat in the dark together, he was fairly certain that the question weighed on her too. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Yelling at you about Reddington. You really don't know, do you?"

She shook her head. "I wish I did."

"He hasn't told me a lot about it. He knew your mother and he was aware of the fire. He said you disappeared after it."

"I only remember glimpses of it," she whispered.

"You don't think he's your dad, do you?"

Liz snorted. "I don't know what that man is to me. I'm not even sure he knows. I'm the daughter of some woman he seems to have loved and he… I don't know what he's trying to do."

"He'll say he's protecting you," Jacob sighed, slumping back against the couch, his tongue apparently looser that night with her than it had been in a while. It felt good. "He said something about an organization being after him. A Cabal. He said that he stole a blackmail file that was supposed to protect him from them. You too, I guess."

"I don't get it, though. Who am I to him? So I'm the daughter of some dead Russian spy. Why does that matter?" Her voice hitched at the end and Liz gripped the rabbit in her hand hard and leaned forward. "It used to be so much easier than this. I'd go in, do a job, and move on. How do you do this?"

"Live?" Jacob chuckled and reached forward, pulling her into his arms.

She fell into them willingly and buried her face in his t-shirt. "I can't do this without you," she confessed softly. "I know you don't trust me. I don't blame you."

"I'm trying, Lizzie," he breathed and felt her wrap her arms around his middle. It felt so natural somehow, and his hand moved to stroke her hair soothingly. They sat there like that for a long moment, silence washed over them and holding onto each other, before Liz shifted and sat up, a confused expression flittering across her face. "What?"

"It's hard." He blinked, feeling like he missed something and watched as she pulled the rabbit she was still holding up for inspection. "Look," she instructed, holding the rabbit up for inspection and showing the burned section. "It's been sewn shut here. There's something inside."

Jacob watched as Liz peeled the little rabbit apart and started digging in the stuffing. Slowly she pulled out what she had been searching for: a tiny, black box wrapped in a protective covering. He squinted at it in the dark as she undid the bubble wrap and opened it up. "I think we know why Reddington was so interested in finding you," he breathed.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I can't begin to tell you how much fun it is to write this story. I had no idea what sort of an undertaking it was going to be when I started it, but it doesn't seem to be slowing down. My plotpoints keep expanding as things happen, and I imagine if we get the answers in the show that they keep promising us, they might expand more. I just finished writing chapter34 today, so this evening I'm hoping to finish up and post the second one-shot for the new canon-based Tessler collection. If you haven't had a chance to check out my new one-shot series, it's called Changing the Dynamic. The show gave us Tessler! I will never not be excited over that scene between them with Jacob talking Ress down.

Next time - Jacob and Meera go undercover, Ressler finds out about the blackmail file, and Reddington pays Patricia McDurren a visit to retrieve something he needs.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty**

They had spoken about it at length the night before and had decided that approaching Reddington before Jacob went undercover, possibly for several consecutive days, was a bad choice. Liz wanted answers, but she had relented. They would do this together. The fact he wanted to was more than she had hoped for.

"You'll be careful, won't you?" she asked as they stepped out of the vehicle in the garage.

"They're a bunch of hippies, Liz. Of all the times I've gone undercover for the bureau, this isn't the one I'd worry about." He offered her a smile. "Anyway, going undercover was _your_ idea."

She pursed her lips together, trying to gauge how far was too far to push it. He was precariously balanced when it came to how they were handling each other, and he had lost his temper more than once in the past week. The times that worried her the most were when he walked off to cool down. She saw him leaving and at times it was like he would never be back.

They couldn't live their lives like that though. He came back, every time, and she had to remember that.

Liz reached out and caught hold of his sleeve as he started moving towards the lift. "I'm serious. We don't know what ties these people have. You and I both know that the bad guys don't present themselves like that. If this - what did Reddington call it? A Cabal? - is really as deep into everything as he thinks, who's to say where it stops and starts?"

"I'm going to talk to Aram about looking into that file before I leave. I'll go to Cooper with it when I know something, and Liz…"

She didn't like the look he was giving her. "What?"

"I'm going to ask Ress to keep an eye on you. It's the only way I can focus while I'm out there. At least until we know why Red hid a blackmail file with a four year old kid."

"He _hates_ me," Liz argued.

"He doesn't trust you. There's a difference."

Liz huffed and her husband offered her a thin smile. She did her best to echoed it and loosed her grip on him, her hand dropping down to hover near his. Jacob reached tentatively for it, fingers brushing along her knuckles and it was everything she could do not to grab his hand then. "I trust you," she said after a moment, her voice a little unsteady. "And we're doing this together."

"Together," he agreed.

"Hope the day's not interrupting something."

Liz sighed and suddenly Jacob's fingers left hers like they were two teenagers being caught where they shouldn't be.

"Hey, Ress. Listen-"

"Can you walk and talk? I just got a call and you and Meera have an in, but you need to move now."

Liz saw the switch in her husband and suddenly he was all business, the issue with the file dropped. She just hoped that he remembered to hand it over to Aram before he left.

* * *

Jacob had been set to be an undercover agent for the FBI until Ressler had pitched the Reddington task force to him. He had graduated with the highest marks for his undercover work at Quantico, and he would have been good at it. He even thought he would have enjoyed it. There was a certain appeal to shifting in and out of different aliases, leaving everything behind and not being tied down, but he'd only run a couple of operations before Ressler had reached out to him and he had taken a different path. He couldn't say he regretted it, even if he enjoyed the occasional rush of becoming someone entirely different.

"I've always wondered what sort of social structure you would have fit into before the FBI. Say in undergrad, or something. You make it difficult to get a good read on you," Meera mused as they walked down the street towards the little diner that they had received a tip that Patricia McDurren had been seen at. It was time to find out if she was a hostage or a willing runner.

"Who says I fit into any of them?" Jacob asked with a glance at her from the corner of his eye.

"I bet you were a chameleon. You got in wherever you wanted to."

"Took you until today to figure that out?"

"I think you're as close to yourself with us as you get."

"And that's exactly what I want you to think," Jacob chuckled as they stepped inside.

The place wasn't too busy, and both agents spotted the senator's daughter as they walked in. They eased into a booth just behind the one where she sat with a dark haired woman with whom she was speaking quietly to. Jacob risked a glance to see that the other woman was Carrie Ann Beck, the supposedly dead co-founder of the Front. Even right behind them, they couldn't hear what was being said. He offered Meera a smile that caused her to quirk an eyebrow as he peeked around her. "Patricia McDurren?"

The woman with her back to them stiffened, but didn't turn, so Jacob stood and circled around, grinning easily. "I _thought_ that was you! You don't remember me, do you? My little sister and you had a class together last semester and we met at that coffee shop right off campus. How's the school year treating you? You should be pretty close to graduation, right?"

Patricia McDurren stared at him for half a moment, glancing over at Carrie Ann briefly. "I'm sorry, what was your sister's name?"

"Becky Hollander. You two had that political science class together."

"Right," she answered with all the signs of someone that was still trying to place a person. "The coffee shop. Right. You're-"

"Brad," he answered with a grin. "Glad to know I make an impression."

"Oh no. I, uh, I remember you," she managed.

"Brad Hollander," Jacob introduced himself as he reached across the table to shake Carrie Ann's hand.

The woman took it, but looked entirely uncomfortable. "Hi."

"Mal, come say hi. Sorry, this is Mallory."

Meera flashed a smile as she turned. "You're breaking in on their conversation."

"Guess I am, sorry."

"Tell Becky I said hi?" Patricia asked awkwardly and Carrie Ann slipped out of the other side of the booth. "We're actually on our way out."

"Sure," he answered cheerfully and moved out of their way. After they were gone he slipped back into his seat. "She was awkward, but that was just trying to place me."

"She's not being held against her will," Meera agreed.

"I'll call it in. We can get someone to tail her-"

"Don't worry about it. We'll just follow the tracker I put on her when you had her attention."

Jacob blinked, a small smile tipping his lips. "Smooth. I didn't even see it."

"Neither did she," Meera answered and stood, smirking at him.

* * *

The more logical side of him knew that he needed to find a way to trust the woman that had married his best friend, even if it seemed like it might have been to gain access to Raymond Reddington, at least in the beginning. Ressler had promised Jacob to have his back in all of this, and so far having his partner's back had meant keeping his mouth shut about it for the most part and not getting into any more fistfights over the whole fiasco. It was a mess, but it was the one they were in, and if Ressler could take himself out of the middle for a few moments and look at the evidence in an unbiased manner, there would be a good chance he would see that it hadn't _all_ been a lie. Liz had kept the adoption videos and Jake had told him that she had been open and honest about everything she could be at their home. He _should_ give her at least as much of a chance as he gave Reddington.

The problem was that he was in the middle of all of it, and every time Ressler saw Elizabeth Phelps standing in the Post Office all he could see was the woman that had betrayed his friend. He knew he shouldn't let his personal loyalties get in the way of the job, but knowing and doing were entirely different things.

She stood with Aram then, speaking lowly to him, and as Ressler approached the conversation immediately ceased. "Something I need to know about?" he asked, not quite able to keep the irritation out of his voice.

Aram looked a little like a deer caught in the headlights. "Um, Agent Phelps asked me to look into something, but I got the impression it was supposed to stay quiet until we figured out what it was."

Well that wasn't ominous at all. "Is it something for Cooper?" Ressler asked as Liz shot Aram a look of disbelief that he'd spoiled that much.

"I'll talk to him," Liz hissed and all but dragged Ressler off to the side by his coat sleeve. He ripped out of her grip and she turned a look more intense than he'd ever seen out of her. "It's something Reddington can't know about."

"What is it?"

"We're not entirely sure." He could see the struggle flash through her eyes before she covered it again. "Jacob trusts you. I don't know why, with the way you study your rule book like it'll save you or something, but he does."

"Jake knows where my loyalties lie," Ressler snapped.

"Has he… What has he told you about Reddington's and my connection?"

"That you say you don't know what it is," Ressler grumbled.

Liz glanced around, looking for something. "Reddington seems to think there's someone after him."

"Yeah, Jacob did tell me that. An organization that he blackmailed or something."

"If he did, he should have kept a better hold of the blackmail device."

Ressler blinked hard. "You two found it?"

"I had a small box of things from when I was little-"

"In your home? The agents should have taken that."

"See? That's what I mean. Focus on what matters, Don. In it was a stuffed rabbit I've had since before the fire. We were talking last night and looking through the box. There was something sewn into it. It was a really old jumpdrive of some sort. Jacob dropped it off with Aram before he left."

"That's what he wanted to talk to me about in the garage this morning," Ressler breathed.

"Like I said, he trusts you."

She sounded a little bitter over that, and Ressler sighed, glancing over to Aram. "Have you been able to figure out what it is?"

The technician looked up from his place. "What? No, not yet. It's… Well, I'm not even sure what it is yet. It'll probably take a few days."

Ressler nodded. "Let us know as soon as you have something on it." He turned back to Liz. "Do you think this is why he's interested in you?"

"I don't know. It seems like it might be, but Jacob said that Reddington told him that the blacklist file was supposed to keep both of us safe." She closed her eyes for a moment, frustration rolling off of her in waves. "He knew my mother. I don't even remember the woman, but he knew her. He's after something, I just don't know what yet."

"You sound like Jacob when he gets fixated on something."

A smile flickered across her face. "I think we're more alike than he ever knew."

Or admitted to himself, Ressler thought. Jacob had always had a keen intuition about people. While Ressler didn't think for a moment that his friend had known anything consciously about his wife's deception, maybe subconsciously he had known there was more to her than met the eye.

"Does Connolly have full access to this place now?"

Ressler followed her gaze to where the assistant AG was speaking to Cooper in his office. "He does seem to be around a lot," he mused. "Yeah, he and Reven Wright have been put over our task force."

"You don't trust him?"

"I don't think any of us do."

"People talk. I know they do, but he seems fascinated," Liz said quietly.

Ressler frowned, thinking of how Connolly had all but chased Jacob out of the building the day before to ask him about Masha Rostova and how Jacob had told him that the organization was made up of individuals in the place of power. Great. Just great. He was starting to share in Jake's paranoia.

"Agent Ressler?" Aram called over, lowering his headphones. "Agents Phelps and Malik are following Miss McDurren now. They seem to think that she's involved in all of this instead of an unwilling participate."

"Following?" Liz echoed. "Where?"

"He said that they thought she was on her way to the Front's compound. They're going to hand it off to another team once they find it, but they were just checking in."

"And Jake left me with handling McDurren," Ressler sighed and rolled his eyes. He had no question his partner had slipped out of _that_ particularly terrible conversation on purpose. He owed him. Big time.

* * *

Raymond Reddington stepped out of the brush at the edge of the compound. There were no guards, per se, just a lack of civilization for miles around. Things were moving in faster than he might have hoped, but the disappearance of Patricia McDurren actually worked in his favour. The girl had left the life she knew and scooted off to an idealism of her choosing. Her father seemed determined that the whole thing needed to be handled quietly, and Red had a suspicion he knew why.

Patricia had taken something in retaliation that, should the senator's fellow Cabal members ever find out was missing, would land the man in a great deal of trouble. Well, his loss was Reddington's gain.

"Miss McDurren," he called out cheerfully, seeing the redhead Georgetown dropout turn. "Or is it Pepper now? I hear changing one's name can be a freeing experience."

The young woman froze before glancing around to see if anyone else was close by. She saw that they were alone and her gaze fell back on the Concierge of Crime. "I know who you are."

"Oh good. That saves us some time. I assume you know what I'm here for then."

She glared at him. "No, I don't."

Reddington chuckled. "My dear, you really need to work on your skills in lying." He pulled a gun and held it in her. "There is a key you took from your father's safe when you ran away from home. I need it. I'd prefer not to shoot you, but-"

" _I_ need it," she bit out. "Otherwise my father would have sent the FBI into this place already. He doesn't because he knows if try found it - if the wrong people found it - they would know what it is. You think you need it, Mr Reddington. I do. It's my ticket to safety."

"Are you willing to die for it?"

She blinked at him. "You wouldn't-"

"I assure you I would. That key will help to protect someone very dear to me, and I will walk away with it today, even if I have to leave this compound in ashes."

Slowly she nodded. "I hid it in the wind chimes," she said quietly and motioned to where the bottles were hanging from a tree off to their left.

"Lead the way," Reddington said with a false smile and followed her to them. He looked up at the multicoloured bottles that swung softly in the breeze and he heard the light clinking of one. His smile turned a little more real as he tugged it from its place. "Think of it this way, Pepper, this will give you an opportunity to brush up on those lying skills when the FBI shows."

"My father-"

"Oh goodness, you _are_ naive, aren't you? Those two you met in the diner this morning were FBI. I'd wager that they tracked you here. No, there's no saving the Front from the raid coming to its doorstep. You, on the other hand…"

"I have to go," she whispered.

"Such loyalty. Well, all the best." He turned, leaving the terrified daughter of the Cabal agent to her own choices and loyalties as the sirens sounded the arrival of the FBI. He started for the parameter where he would be out of sight well before they made it around and Dembe would pick him up and take him back into the city before Agents Phelps and Malik saw that he was there. The two would likely lead in the team the FBI had sent to them and the task force would, very quietly, receive another mark in their favour for a terrorist group taken down on their watch. The Front would fall and Reddington had the key. It was a much needed step in the right direction and everyone won something from it in the end. Now all he needed was the Fulcrum itself.

* * *

Liz wasn't used to seeing the aftermath of the end of an assignment. She went in, did her job, and was gone by the time the repercussions hit. Now, though, as she watched what was happening around her, it was a little strange.

The FBI had taken down an Eco-terrorist organization and, apparently, Patricia McDurren had been quietly picked up as she tried to escape the compound. Connolly had delivered the message that the senator sent his thanks for their hard work and, of course, their discretion in the whole ordeal. It sounded more like a quiet reminder than thanks to Liz, but the thought was quickly overridden when the doors to the lift opened and Jacob and Meera walked in, both a little disheveled from the takedown, but at least they appeared whole.

"Hey," her husband offered as he leaned against the desk she was working at.

"Look at you wearing a bulletproof vest," she murmured with a small smile.

"Tends to happen more than you'd think," he answered with a smile that actually reached his eyes. "How'd things go here? Any trouble with Reddington?"

"He's barely been here," Liz answered, "but Don knows."

"About the file?"

"He heard Aram and me talking and… Are you mad?"

"No," Jacob answered quickly, his expression shifting from the blank one he'd been giving her. "No, of all the people here, I trust Ress." He glanced over to where Meera, Samar, and Aram were talking. "Honestly, I trust my whole team."

She looked down for a moment. "That's big for you."

"I guess it is."

"Am I part of your team?" she asked, regretting the words as soon as they had left her lips and had received a startled look from him. They both knew what she was asking. Not only if he might be starting to trust her again, but could he? Would she ever be more than an information source?

"Liz, I-"

"Jake," Ressler called and started over.

Jacob flashed his partner an easy grin. "You done getting your ass chewed out by McDurren?"

"You owe me for leaving me to that."

"He didn't even have to talk to him," Liz said with a smirk. "Connolly delivered the message."

"Speaking of," Ressler prompted and Jacob sighed.

"Reddington's blackmail file."

"You didn't trust Connolly or McDurren. Is that your usual paranoia or-"

"I don't know. The whole thing has me nervous. All I know is that I trust this team."

"Are you going to tell Cooper about it?"

"When I have something to tell him."

Ressler nodded. "Keep me in the loop?"

"Definitely."

Ressler looked between them. "Good work today," he said gruffly and turned.

Jacob quirked an eyebrow. "I think that may have been directed at you."

"Did hell freeze over?"

"Maybe." Her husband pulled in a breath. "So what do you think about opening up that Bordeaux tonight over lasagna?"

"Only if you're cooking it."

"Well I don't want food poisoning," he teased.

Liz rolled her eyes. "One time," she grumbled. "It was _one_ time!"

He grinned broadly and started for the lift. He was quiet until the doors closed and he reached over without looking at her, lacing his finger with hers. "I'm working on the trust thing with you, Liz," he said quietly, all teasing gone. "It's hard for me."

"I know. We're… moving in the right direction at least, aren't we?"

He squeezed her fingers. "Yeah."

A real smile took hold and she loosed a breath. Whatever came, whatever they had to face down, she thought she could do it with him.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I really hope that they're not planning to make us wait until the end of the season for some Keen2 moments in the show. I was really hoping they'd get some sort of reunion in this last episode. <sigh>

Next Time - A bomb threat pulls the team out of bed at the earliest hours of the morning, Liz and Jacob have a fight, Ressler has his partner's back, and Liz and Red go undercover together.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter Thirty-One**

She was surrounded by flames. They leapt up from every inch of the room, swallowing it and ripping it apart. She heard the sound of a scream, but her eyes were closed so tightly that she wasn't sure at first who the voice belonged to. After a moment, she realized that it must have been her own rattling around in her ears as she hid inside the wall, hoping the flames couldn't get to her.

All at once she was standing in the middle of it, quiet in the center of the raging chaos around her, and she saw Raymond Reddington standing with her, that smile of his that he gave when he wanted something he knew someone didn't want to give. "What is it that you really want, Lizzie?" he asked her, head tilted a little to the side and studying her. "This… life? This fantasy you've built with Agent Phelps? You understand that you can never have that, don't you? He will never trust you again."

"Shut up," Liz hissed, taking a step away from him and feeling the flames burn the back of her legs. "He loves me."

"Love and trust aren't the same," Reddington answered. "You'll just get him killed."

"I won't," she whispered desperately. "I'll protect him."

He gave her a sad smile and shifted so that she could see just beyond him to where her husband was laid out on the floor, blood soaked through his shirt, and a vacant expression in his blue eyes. "But you didn't."

His name left her lips in the form of a scream and she felt something - someone? - holding her back so that she couldn't reach her husband. She thrashed and fought, but the grip was strong.

"Liz? Lizzie, wake up."

She felt hot tears falling and her eyes popped open, finding that the flames were gone and Jacob was bent over her, worry etched into his features. Without thinking she sat up and threw her arms around his neck, burying her face in the crook of his neck.

Jacob shifted in the bed, arms wrapped around her and she felt the sob shake her as she clung to him. He whispered soothingly as he always did after one of her nightmares, his fingers tangling in her dark hair, bringing her slowly down from it. After a long few moments she adjusted her grip on him so that she didn't have such a death grip on him, but didn't quite let go.

"That was worse than usual," he whispered.

"You were dead," she answered, her voice breaking. "The room was on fire and Reddington was there. He said… He said I'd gotten you killed. You were-"

"Shh," he hushed and pulled her closer. "I'm okay. I'm right here. I'm not… Liz, I'm not going anywhere."

She sniffed hard and pulled back to look him in the eyes. "I love you. I know… I know you don't trust me yet, and I get that, but-"

"I believe that," Jacob answered roughly and Liz swallowed hard.

"You do?"

"I do. I have… Well, I think on some level I've always known that those feelings were real. I just-"

"Have to process it," Liz answered quietly.

"Yeah. It's going to take a while."

"I know."

He tried for a smile and leaned a little closer to her. He hadn't kissed her, not really, since everything had come out, and they were only centimeters away when his phone started buzzing on the nightstand and he leaned back to reach for it, frowning as he squinted at the text. "What is it?"

"We need to get dressed. There's been a bomb threat."

"Here in DC?"

"Not sure yet. Get dressed. We need to get in." He paused, halfway out of bed, and he looked torn for a moment.

"It's fine," she managed the lie. "This is important."

He gave an uncertain nod and was gone, disappearing into the bathroom. She heard the shower click on and ran her hands through her hair, still trying to banish the image of him lying dead from her mind. She had to pull herself together. They had a job to do.

* * *

Elizabeth had been more distant than usual in the last few days, something eating at her in a way that Reddington didn't quite know how to fix. Not that she would let him if he could, of course. He had tried speaking to her husband on it, but Jacob had been little to no help. He had been just as short and irritable as Liz had been lately, and it left Reddington wondering if it was their own strained relationship that had them both put out. If so, perhaps she would be more inclined to leave, though he hardly thought she would leave with him until she let herself get to know him better.

The threat had hit his radar in the strangest of ways. A business associate of his had mentioned a name offhandedly and Red had made the call on impulse. Max had come in three days before to personally deliver a pair of bombs to a client, but who the client was, the bomb maker wouldn't say. He only indicated that Red should find himself in a different city for the next few weeks.

Needless to say Cooper had been interest in the intel, even at three in the morning.

Now Reddington stood in the war room of the Post Office with half of the team gathered and looking very put out with so little sleep. Better put out than in pieces, he thought.

The door to the lift opened, gaining his attention, but Aram was the only one to exit, somehow balancing two sets of trays of coffee. "Hey guys, it's kinda early so I thought you might want a coffee."

"You are amazing, Aram," Samar said as she plucked the cup with her name in it from his tray.

"Amazing?" he stammered.

She offered him a grin that would have made any man melt. "And it's perfect too. I think I owe you one."

"We all do," Cooper agreed.

"Oh, it's… Well the shop is right by my apartment. It was nothing." He pulled a folded bag out of his satchel. "I brought a few bagels too if anyone wants them. There's a coffee for you too, Mr Reddington."

Red blinked, having found the whole scene quite amusing, and offered the technician a real smile as he took the offered beverage. "Thank you, Aram. We really must do something about the coffee maker here. I can have an expression machine delivered in-"

"That's really not necessary, Reddington," Cooper answered and the doors to the lift opened to reveal Donald Ressler and the Phelps'.

"Is that coffee? Real coffee?" Jacob asked, his expression lightening considerably from the dazed, exhausted sort of look he had been wearing.

"Seriously? Do you have an alert that goes off in your head when there's caffeine around or something?" Ressler demanded.

"Only for the good stuff. Aram, you're my hero. Is it-"

"Yeah, I had agent Ressler explain the way you make it one time and I wrote it down." He glanced over at Liz. "Tea with milk, right?"

Elizabeth beamed. "Perfect."

"I believe there was a bomb threat?" Meera prompted, her voice a little snippy.

Reddington chuckled to himself and Cooper shot him a look. "I have a… colleague, we'll call him, that is quite talented in bomb making. He's in town and has sold two bombs to an unknown client-"

"Unknown or you're not saying?" Ressler cut in.

"My colleague wouldn't give his client's name, and pushing him any further wasn't getting me anywhere. I'll continue to press him, but I thought it best to start all of you on what I know. The first bomb can do a bit of damage from what he said, but the second can take out a much wider range. The casualty rate would be high."

"Any ideas on potential targets?" Samar asked, sipping on her coffee.

"From what I gathered before he'd had just a bit more than he could handle to drink, it's a political situation. He was vague, though he should be resurfacing towards consciousness by lunchtime or so."

"One of us should go with you," Jacob said. "Take us in as an interested buyer. Ask for a reference. Whatever."

"You seem very interested in playing any other role but your own lately, Agent Phelps," Reddington mused and watched the younger man stiffen very slightly.

"I'll go," Elizabeth volunteered, risking a glance at the rest of the team. "My guess is your colleague is Max Ruddiger, isn't it? I've dealt with him before. You wouldn't have to set any groundwork."

Reddington lifted an eyebrow and glanced over to Cooper who frowned and pulled in a deep breath. "If we weren't on a time crunch, I'd say no, but we are. Ms Phelps, we need the time of the first bomb going off and if you can get a meet with the buyer we can stop it from ever happening."

"I can get that."

"Good. Make this happen, people."

* * *

"Just say it."

Jacob looked up from where he was leaned against a table, arms crossed over his chest, and trying very hard not to think about his wife going on an assignment with Raymond Reddington. "Say what?"

Liz glared at him and he rolled his eyes. "What do you think?" she snapped.

"Would I have asked you if I knew? It's not like you're exactly an open book lately."

He stiffened a little at the look he received and his expression darkened. "Fine. I don't like the idea of you going under with Reddington without knowing what's really going on with that blackmail file."

"Aram can't break into the thing. I said we should confront him and you've been dragging your feet."

"So this is my fault?"

Liz turned her back to him, crossing the room that they were waiting in to at least pretend to look at what was on the table there. "Well it's not mine. I have enough crap I've done wrong recently. Could you try not to add stuff to it that I didn't?" She paused, her shoulders tight, and she turned around slowly. "I'm-"

"No," he cut her off, his own expression carefully blank. "You're good at this. Hell, you fooled me, so you're probably the best. We'd be stupid not to use that."

"Jacob," she murmured, her voice going soft, but his temper was already raging.

"I don't need to hold your hand down here. They should be in to for you with a mic and whatever else they want in a minute. I'll see you when you get back."

He turned, ignoring the hurt expression that settled over her at his words as he stormed out, nearly knocking the person that they'd been waiting on over in his exit. By the time he reached the main section of the Post Office he was so angry he could barely see straight and stormed straight into the office he shared with Ressler.

"You okay?" his partner asked as he shut the door hard.

"She's just… _frustrating_. What the hell does she want from me anyway? Just to pretend nothing's wrong? I'd love to. I would, but I _can't_. That would just-"

"Rip you both apart," Ressler murmured slowly. "Yeah, I agree."

"We used to have this thing where I'd… try to work through what I was feeling, you know? I'd try and we'd work through it together. I can't do that anymore. I can't…" He sniffed, sitting heavily in his chair and leaning forward to press the heels of his hands into his eyes.

"Trusting her isn't going to come easy, Jake. She's got to earn it."

Jacob snorted. "I don't know. It's too much to wade through at once."

"You going to shut down again on me?"

"No."

"Good, because we have a guy that has two bombs and wants to hurt people with them." He paused and Jacob heard him shift. "Is Liz really the one you don't trust in this situation?"

There were times when Ressler was entirely oblivious and others when Jacob was reminded that he was one of the few people that _really_ knew him. He looked up. "What if he just takes off with her?"

"We'll have agents shadowing them."

He swallowed hard. "What if she helps him?"

Ressler heaved a breath. "There it is," he murmured. "Jake, that woman gave up her freedom to be with you. I don't trust her, but… I think if she were going to run she would have done it by now. She's been here for weeks now."

"I snapped at her."

"You do that." He shifted. "Listen, Jake, you've been under a lot of stress with this. If you love her still, don't not tell her because you're scared to trust her, okay?"

"You don't even like her," Jacob managed and his friend snorted.

"But you're my partner, and I told you I'd have you're back. Talk to her. It's always worked before, right?"

He nodded, feeling exceptionally stupid. "I have to try to catch her before she leaves."

"Then you can focus on your job?"

Jacob rolled his eyes and started out the door, pretty sure he heard Ressler chuckling at him as he did.

"If you're looking for Liz, she just walked out," Samar called.

Jacob stopped, glaring in the direction of the exit and tilted his head a little as she grabbed a pair of keys off the desk. "Meera and I will be tailing them in case anything goes wrong," she explained. "We'll keep your wife safe."

He nodded numbly and watched her go. As soon as Liz came back, he would apologize. He would take her aside and tell her everything he'd been forcing down, telling himself it was too soon. He didn't care anymore. Ressler was right. It was the fact he hadn't spoken to her, hadn't bounced the thoughts and the feelings off of her, that had left him so unbalanced recently. He loved her and she needed to know that beyond a shadow of a doubt, no matter how much it terrified him.

* * *

"Is there something wrong with your food?"

Liz looked up, the voice startling her out of her thoughts. She blinked a little owlishly at Reddington who sat across the table with her, looking at her curiously with a patient smile. "No, just thinking."

"About?"

"When the hell Max is supposed to be here? He's late."

"Dembe may have had trouble rousing him. He'll be here though. What has your thoughts so preoccupied?"

"It's nothing."

"Obviously not," he answered, sipping at his espresso.

She winced a little, Jacob's sharp retorts weighing on her. "Jacob and I had a fight just before I left."

"I'm so sorry to hear that."

She snorted. "Yeah?"

His brows drew together. "If it upsets you, Elizabeth, of course."

"You didn't seem to feel that way when you forced me to cancel the adoption."

"A child was not what you needed with everything."

"Or led my husband into figuring out my secret."

"I tried to steer him away from it."

"You should have stayed away," she hissed. "You should have stayed away and neither of us would be hurt right now. We could have-"

"Continued living a lie?"

"Been happy," she answered, her voice breaking.

Reddington took a bite of his waffles. "I know this is difficult to believe, Elizabeth, but this has all been for you. Your husband will be fine. He'll wrap his mind around it sooner or later, or he won't, but in the end-"

"In the end you'll get what you want," she growled and watched his expression change in a way she couldn't quite define.

"And what do you think that is?"

"I found the file. The blackmail file you told Jacob about. I _know_ why you came into my life, Reddington."

"You _found_ it?" Reddington asked, blinking hard. "You think you know, but whatever Jacob told you… Agent Phelps doesn't know everything, only what I've told him."

"Then tell me," she snapped.

"Not here."

"Then when?"

"After we handle this, Elizabeth, you have my word I will explain what that is." He took a long sip of his drink. "Though I should warn you, you decision to try to fix things with your husband will only put him in danger."

His words echoed her nightmare so closely that she stared, even after she heard him greet a very hungover Max Ruddiger. The German bomb maker recognized her though, and his smile broke out instantly. "Mags," he greeted her by the name she'd given him at the time, "Red didn't say you'd be here."

"I heard you were in town and felt like the luckiest girl in the world. I need something and I need it fast." She slipped a piece of paper over to him, the specs for the larger bomb he'd just delivered detailed on it.

Max whistled. "I just finished something similar. How fast?"

"Thirty-six hours."

He shrugged. "No way to replenish my stocks in time for that."

"Money isn't an option on this one."

"You know I'd do anything for you, my dear, but it can't physically be done."

"What about the gentleman you just sold the other to?" Reddington asked. "You could reach out to him, offer him his money back and then a sizable bit more, and keep your negotiation fee for playing middle man?"

"Isn't that your job, Red?"

Reddington offered him a smile. "Isn't that what I'm doing?"

"I don't know where he's staying."

"But you must have a way to contact him. Give him a call. Heaven knows that doubling your profit could set you up quite nicely."

"Double," he murmured thoughtfully. "Give me a moment."

Liz watched him pull the phone from his pocket as he started for the door, Dembe moving to linger there. She turned her attention back to Reddington. "What sort of danger?" she hissed as if they were picking right back up.

Reddington sighed. "There is always the chance all of this could blow up rather suddenly. I move quickly and you are capable of the same. Jacob has attachments here, despite his offsetting personality, and might not be so quick to move. These people are dangerous."

"So I'll protect him."

"In doing so you may only put yourself in harm's way."

"He's worth it," Liz said steadily. She loved him. She'd been willing to give up the only life she had known for him. As soon as they got back to the Post Office she was going to find him and tell him that she might have trouble with it, but she understood his need for time. She would work harder to love him the way she wanted to love him. Without the lies. She would earn his trust.

The door opened again and Max had a grin plastered across his face. "Are you still the best, Mags?"

"Of course I am."

"Good. I'll send to the address. You'll need your own in and your own cover for it, but if you can make it in by eight tonight, he'll meet with you."

"What's his name?"

"Never got it."

"But you have a phone number?" Reddington scoffed.

"He'll be looking for Red. You're the broker, after all."

"Fine, but my business partner will want to be there," Liz said, ignoring the curious look Reddington shot her. "He's footing the bill."

"As long as Red's there, he said he's happy to deal. Now," Max said as took a seat, "do they have something a bit stronger than coffee?"

They got through the rest of breakfast as quickly as they could without setting off alarms, but the fact that Liz had to work out how to get into a private party by that evening was a damn good excuse. As they exited, Reddington leaned in. "Business partner?"

She offered him a tight smile. "I'm not going in without my husband."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, after the wrap up of the conclusion of the Director, I had to take a look at my plot points for this story. Surprisingly things didn't have to be shifted around too badly with the way things turned out in the show, which is a relief, but I'm holding off on an arc that I'd really like to put in before the end, but I'm not sure if the show is going to deal with it or not... Ugh. All of your secrets, Blacklist! Why?! :P

I hope you guys are are still enjoying this as much as I am. It's so much fun to write, especially now that Jacob and Liz are finally starting to move towards fixing things between them. It's slow and they're both stubborn, but I love all the Keen2 feels that come with it :D As always, I love to hear from you guys. It always makes my day!

Next time - Jacob and Liz go undercover together and things get dangerous.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

They had been going nonstop since since Liz and Reddington had come back from the meet. The gathering that they needed access to was a political dinner, one that would take every favour they could pull to get them in. Jacob hadn't had a chance to speak to her privately, and before he knew it she had already left the Post Office to get ready for the party.

Hudson met him at the door and he bent to scratch his head before making his way up the stairs. He heard Liz before he got to the top and she was cursing at something in the closet. Jacob paused there, a small smile perking his lips as he watched her fighting with the dress. She was beautiful. Well, she had always been beautiful, but that evening she took his breath away. They had a second chance. He shouldn't waste that. "You need some help?"

Liz startled, turning to look at him. "Zip me up?"

He moved forward, fingers working at the stiff zipped to a red dress she hadn't worn in years. "I'm sorry," he murmured in her ear. "I broke our rule. I shouldn't have walked away."

"You had every right to-"

"Please don't make excuses for me, Liz. We said we'd work on this and I… I know I close down. I need to talk to you more. It's always better for us when I do."

She nodded and turned. His arms went around her and she offered him a smile. Liz leaned in, her cheek pressed against his chest as she hugged him.

Jacob pressed a kiss to the side of her head and she looked up at him. His breath caught as he leaned down on impulse, lips touching hers. Her hand slowly went to the back of his neck and his fingers tangled in her hair. As Jacob sank into it and for a moment he finally felt steady again.

When they broke, they were both a little lost for breath, but she smiled at him. "I've never worked with you undercover."

"That why you set it up that way?"

"I wanted a chance to spend time with you."

"Normal couples just go on vacation," he chuckled and pulled a smile from her.

"I don't think we're normal, Jacob," she murmured softly. "Come on. Get dressed, otherwise we're going the be late."

He offered her a small smile as he started to peel off his jacket and toe off his boots.

"So," his wife said quietly, and he could feel her eyes on him, "I told Reddington."

He turned suddenly, his shirt half unbuttoned. "What?"

"It wasn't planned," she defended. "He just… Gets under my skin."

"What did he say?" Jacob asked, starting back on the buttons and keeping his tone even.

"He was nervous, like someone might overhear. He said you only knew what he'd told you and that that wasn't anything."

"Evasive bastard," Jacob grumbled as he reached for his dress shirt and pulled it around his shoulders.

Liz stepped forward and her nimble fingers started working the buttons as she spoke. "He said he'd tell me more once this is all over. I'm going to hold him to that." Her glance was tentative when he looked up. "Something about this has you nervous."

Jacob sighed heavily and leaned down, his forehead bumping against hers lightly. "I'm worried," he confessed very softly.

"About what?"

He needed to talk to her, he reminded himself. She had told him, so he needed to tell her, otherwise he would just shut her out again and they would be at a stalemate all over again. "That you'll run with him."

"Jacob," she whispered and tilted up, pressing a kiss to his lips that stole his breath all over again. "I want to be with you. I'm willing… I was willing to risk everything to do that. Even my life. Why, if you're willing to give me a second chance, would I throw that away?"

He shrugged and his wife wrapped her arms around him. "I'm not going anywhere," she promised. "You're my home. I love you."

"I love you too," he answered and felt her sigh against him.

"Really?"

"Never stopped." He kissed her forehead. "Hey, we're cutting it close."

"Right," she said quickly, but he heard the flutter of emotion in her voice and he smiled. It looked like things might finally be turning up.

"You look beautiful."

Liz smiled. "Thank you, babe. But we are late."

"Right," he managed, reaching for the pants. He'd never thought he would be going on an undercover assignment with Liz at his side. Things might take some getting used to, but all in all, this was something he thought he could enjoy.

* * *

The setup was less than ideal, but Reddington supposed that it was better to have Phelps in the middle of an undercover operation rather than someone like Ressler that would be seen a mile away. It had taken quite a bit of convincing to allow Elizabeth a pass in - and really, the pass was given only because her FBI agent husband would be at her side with others littered in the crowd to stop anything else from going awry - though it wouldn't have been quite so much trouble if Harold had simply allowed the Concierge of Crime to do what he did best, but apparently a dinner party made up of military and political elite was one that the assistant director wanted to handle with care. Red had, of course, procured his own invite.

People had already arrived by the time that he walked through the door and took a champagne glass from a passing tray. He didn't see the Phelps', but they weren't due in for another half hour for the meet, which meant that they would only just now be arriving at the earliest. He did see several faces that he knew. Some were friendly, others less so. It was the type of party that Alan Fitch would have attended had he still been with them.

The fact that Max wouldn't give over the name of his client was troublesome, because the man seemed to have quite a bit of information on them if he were the one tasked with the approach. Something about it didn't set well with him.

"Raymond Reddington," a familiar voice purred behind him.

Red turned. "Madeline Pratt. Well that is a surprise. What could you possibly be doing here?"

She flashed him a smile that he hadn't seen in sometime. "I'm here on business, of course, and a bit of pleasure."

He followed her gaze when it flickered over to a man in a sharp suite that was speaking with a group of the same. "Is that your new toy?" he teased.

"Jealous?"

"Hardly. Who is he?"

Her smile only grew. "The once delinquent son of a foreign minister that found he has quite a knack for politics."

"Ah," Reddington acknowledged, "and quite the pocketbook, I'd imagine."

"I'm particularly interested in a piece his family keeps in their home. He's promised to take me there after."

"Doing quite well for yourself then?"

"Well enough. And what brings you to a gathering of your former peers?"

Red tilted his head, scanning the crowd. "Business."

"You should always mix a little business with pleasure. Dance with me?"

He quirked an eyebrow at the extended hand. Well, there were worse ways to fit into a crowd while waiting to meet with a terrorist.

* * *

Liz hadn't seen him in a tux since their wedding. The old thing had been gathering dust since then, but she had to admit that he cleaned up well. She had seen him in suits for work, and while he always looked dashing, there was something that made her think that Jacob was just a little uncomfortable in them. He was a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy, but when he slipped into a role he looked at home in anything. She understood that. Maybe he was right. Maybe they weren't so different after all.

"What?" her husband asked, finally catching her staring.

Liz quirked an eyebrow up and a smile tilted her lips. "You look nice."

He snorted and rolled his eyes cheekily. "I clean up every now and again."

"I know." She took his offered arm as the started to climb the steps to the building. "We should do this for real sometime."

"Which part?"

"Dress up and go out. Not to a politician's get together, of course, but to something nice."

"It's a date, Mrs Phelps," he agreed softly and he reached for the invitations inside his coat and presented them.

Liz tightened her hold on him as they entered, the room bright and filled with chattering people. Her gaze swept over them, her mind already analysing key figures, those that stood out, and, of course, all of the escape routes.

Jacob cleared his throat and she turned her attention back on him. "Just because it's work doesn't mean we can't enjoy tonight too."

She watched him carefully, a small smile tilting her lips. "It would help us blend in," she agreed and felt his fingers reach for hers. He pulled her closer and Liz followed him a few steps over to the dance floor.

Life had gotten so busy before it had fallen apart. She couldn't remember the last time they had taken time to dance. She felt his arms around her and she pressed her cheek against his chest, moving with him. They were equals, and there was something wonderful in that. No more sneaking around and no more lying. She could work with him rather than around him. It was everything she had wanted, but had been too afraid to risk. It left her feeling more at peace than she had felt in a very long time.

"I love you," her husband whispered.

"I love you too." She looked up, finding a goofy smile plastered on his face that she hadn't seen since the days where they had first been getting to know each other. In a way, for him, maybe they were back to that.

Jacob leaned down, the kiss light but so real and it left her wanting more. "I think it's about that time. Your buddy's client may not approach you if I'm right here," he said lowly. "I'll go grab us some drinks?"

"Sounds like a plan," she agreed.

Her husband pulled her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles, leaving her to watch him walk and a small smile playing on her lips. She could get used to this.

"We tried to catch him coming out of school, but the FBI must have offered him something a bit more," a voice said from behind, causing Liz to turn, finding an older gentleman standing there with a glass of amber liquid. He looked a little odd in his suit and hair that just didn't seem to want to lie flat. His glasses, round and thin, set a little oddly on his thin face, and his smile set her nerves on edge, even if she couldn't quite place it. "I'm so sorry," he said and extended a hand. "Peter Kotsiopulos. I understand that you and your husband are assessing a threat here tonight. I won't keep you from your job, of course, though I couldn't help but speak to Katarina Rostova's daughter just a moment."

Liz felt as though he were sizing her up. CIA. He must have been if he were referring to Jacob's offers right outside of school. If he had the clearance, she wasn't surprised he knew about their arrival, but it didn't make her comfortable.

"We might not have gotten a chance at Agent Phelps, but should you ever find the FBI a bit below your standards, Ms Rostova, the intelligence community would be thrilled to have your expert knowledge in hand."

"I think I'm where I need to be," she answered carefully.

"Of course you are." He pulled his phone from his jacket and checked it. "If you'll excuse me?"

She watched him go, spotting a face that should never have been there as he did. She didn't have any doubt that he was the one that they were supposed to be meeting with, but the fact that he was slipping out wasn't a good sign.

Liz looked for Jacob, but didn't spot him immediately. She saw Reddington, though, and crossed the space. "Did you speak with him?" she demanded, ignoring the woman Reddington had been flirting with.

He blinked at her. "Who?"

"Our contact just left. We have to-"

She didn't finish the sentence. She didn't get a chance. The room exploded around them, the force throwing her to her knees and that was the last thing Elizabeth Phelps remembered.

* * *

Donald Ressler was not a fan of getting stuck in the van. It didn't happen often, but when it did he always felt like he was just itching for something to happen.

"Aram, who is this talking to Rostova?" Samar asked from her place and Ressler looked around to see Aram bending to look at the screen.

"Just a sec," he answered and they switched places so that the technician could run a search. He blinked in surprise. "It says I don't have the clearance."

"That's stupid," Ressler grumbled and shifted over, typing his own credentials in. The information popped up. "Peter Kotsiopulos," he read off. "He's the Director of National Clandestine Services. I bet the bastard is trying to pick her off."

"Good thing her deal is with us," Samar agreed.

"She wouldn't leave Agent Phelps like that either, would she?" Aram asked and Ressler shrugged.

"Regardless, Samar called it. If she-" The feeds went down and Ressler only had time to blink in surprise before the whole van rocked dangerously before settling back out. "What the hell?"

All three agents piled out of the van and into the street. Ressler felt his breath catch at the sight of the building. Flames could be seen building inside, an explosion having blown windows out, broken the stairs away, and even left damage to the street. Panicked cries could be heard from all around and Aram was calling it in behind him.

Ressler started peeling his jacket off, but Samar caught him. "What are you doing?"

"Going in to start helping survivors."

"You'll get yourself killed. If you want to help Phelps, that's not the way."

"He wasn't the only one in there. We had half a dozen different agents in there as backup."

"But he's the one you're after. We will get to them, but running in and getting yourself killed doesn't do anyone any good."

"Fire department is on its way," Aram announced.

"Good. Get back in there and start going over the footage to see if anyone left the building before the bomb went off. If this was a setup, there's a chance they were on site. Samar, we need to at least start directing those that got out."

She nodded and they both started forward. Men and women were dazed just outside the building, some looking like they might have been on the edges of it only. Ressler recognized one, and he frowned at the sight of Peter Kotsiopulos. He was leaned up against a parked car, blood trailing down the side of his face, and watching the flames reach for the night sky.

"Director Kotsiopulos. Special Agent Donald Ressler."

Kotsiopulos looked around, his glasses slightly askew. "Agent Ressler," he said slowly. "You were leading this operation."

"Yes sir."

"It looks like your intelligence may have been faulty, Agent Ressler. That or you organisation gave mine purposefully wrong intel."

"We gave the CIA what they needed to know. Anything else you'll need to go over with Director Cooper. For now, did you see anything when you were inside?"

"Masha Rostova, your pet Russian agent was there."

Ressler grimaced. They had cleared any links to her mother's Russian contacts before the deal was finalised, but this wouldn't look good.

"Ressler?" Samar called.

He looked back to Kotsiopulos. "I'd get that head looked at, sir," he offered and turned to see what they could do to get their people out."

* * *

He woke to the sound of someone calling his name. Jacob blinked hard, feeling a heavy weight crushing down on him and pinning him to the floor. He coughed, dust tickling the back of his throat, and he tried to piece together what had happened. He had gone to get their drinks, but as Jacob had returned he had spotted an older gentleman speaking to his wife. She hadn't looked pleased about it, but he had held back in case it was their target. Then he had left, rather abruptly, and Liz had gone for Reddington.

That's when everything had gone black.

Jacob shifted, finding himself unable to move well. He tried to look, but found that he was trapped by part of the building that had fallen down around him. He heard his name again, the voice a little more frantic, and he swallowed hard before sucking in a breath to speak. "Here," he managed and coughed hard at the pressure against his chest that kept him from breathing well. He groaned and his head thumped softly against the floor.

"Jacob?" Liz came into focus, bent over him with a worried look plastered across her face. She looked over her shoulder. "Reddington, I found him!"

"Hey, babe," he greeted roughly. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine, but we need to go. This place could come down any time."

"I'm kind of stuck here," he offered.

"Are you hurt?"

Jacob looked up to see Reddington had joined them. "Don't know yet."

The criminal was inspecting the debris that Jacob was caught under and he frowned deeply. "Elizabeth, I should be able to pull this up with help, but you'll need to move free of it, Agent Phelps."

"I can do that," he answered, hoping it was true. He braced himself as they moved into position, waiting to feel the pressure ease or the real pain to begin, depending on his injuries.

"On three," Reddington said and counted down.

All at once Jacob could breathe and he slid out from under the slab of concrete and managed to cough out "Clear," so that they could let it go again. Dust flew up and Jacob cringed, taking mental inventory of injuries as he lay there.

"Jacob?

"I'm okay," he breathed after a second. "Just bruised." He sat up slowly and grimaced as he got to his feet. "Really bruised."

"We have to go," she said urgently and he saw the flames starting to build. Of all of her nightmare scenarios, this was likely the one that would be closest to the real thing.

Liz put an arm around his middle and he leaned on her ever so slightly as they moved in the direction that the exit had been. "So did anyone get eyes on the guy or was it a setup from the beginning and he wasn't even here?"

"I saw him. At least the guy it had to have been. There was no other reason to be here."

"Who was it?"

"Karakurt," she answered.

"Again, who is that?"

"An agent, Jacob," Reddington said from three steps ahead of them. "One that can cause our little task force a great deal of trouble."

"Sounds… Russian?" Jacob ventured.

"He is. He works for the SVR," Liz explained.

Jacob let loose a long breath. "We thought the bombings would be political. We've got to find that second bomb before he gets it off. If it gets out that the Russians sent one of their agents over here, we'll have another war on our doorstep."

Reddington paused in front of them. "Yes we would," he said thoughtfully.

The building shifted dangerously around them, creaking and bending under the weight, and Liz tightened her grip on him. Carefully Jacob pulled her closer. "We're okay," he promised. "We've got time, and our team is out there."

"It's just-"

"I know." His voice was soft and he pressed a kiss to the side of her head. "I've got you."

He felt her nod and his gaze shifted to Reddington. The older man was watching them with a distant and sad sort of expression. "What are you thinking?"

"That it's a coincidence and I don't believe in coincidences."

"You think it's that group that's after you?"

"It would explain how Karakurt came into the country as he did, but if it is the Cabal, they've stolen yet another person from me tonight."

Jacob shot him a confused look, but it was Liz that answered as Red ignored it and started towards where the exit should have been. "He ran into a friend of his. Madeline Pratt. She was killed in the explosion."

"Damn. Still, isn't that a stretch? Criminals get past security measures. It happens. What makes you think he was Cabal?"

"He made sure that I was going to be in attendance. Here," Reddington called out. "There's a bit of debris in the way, but we should be able to get out this way."

"Jacob?"

Jacob found his wife's gaze on him and there was something unsettling in it. He was barely able to pull in a breath to voice the question when the building gave another terrible shift and the ceiling came crashing down around them. He grabbed hold of her, diving for cover.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, I know that a lot of people said they were really looking forward to the undercover chapter, so I hope it met expectations! I feel like they really didn't get to do a lot be before everything quite literally fell down around them, but I really wanted to work their dance in. I love the idea of them undercover and this being, in a way, the first date they've had back. It sort of suits in a strange little way lol

Next time - Liz is clever, Meera's loyalties are tested, Red and Cooper discuss the Cabal, and Jacob and Ressler land themselves in a high speed car chase.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

There wasn't any warning as the building folded in on itself, floors coming down and flames that had been hidden inside reaching towards the sky. Ressler could only watch with a terror creeping up in him as it happened. He felt useless stuck outside while members of his team were inside.

"My word."

He turned, finding Meera Malik standing behind his, her eyes wide as she watched it. She had been the link that had helped coordinate their invites on such short notice, her CIA connections having been useful in that. It also meant that she likely knew and had either worked with or for multiple people attending the party that night.

"Are Phelps and the others out yet?" she asked softly.

"They're looking for survivors. I have no idea what that second explosion will have done to set them back."

"It was a set up."

"I think that's a safe bet. My guess is that Ruddiger's client never had any intentions to meet with Jake and Liz at all. Samar's bringing Ruddiger in for questioning. She'll call when she has him."

"Reddington won't like that."

"If he made it," Ressler said roughly.

"Agent Ressler? One of our men found several of your agents," a fireman called out.

Ressler barely had a chance to thank him as he took off running in the direction that he had indicated. A couple firefighters were helping people out of the rubble, but to one side sat two people Donald Ressler recognized well. Jacob and Liz Phelps were covered in dirt and grime, but they looked fairly well intact. Jacob was examining Liz's wrist carefully, but looked up when Ressler called his name.

"You two okay?"

"Yeah. They told us to sit over here and get out of their way," Jacob answered with a cheeky grin. "We're mostly whole."

"Where's Reddington?"

Liz stood, her husband following her, so that they could speak quietly. "Reddington left to follow up on a lead as soon as we got out. He thinks it's tied to the Cabal."

"We're going to have a name to put to the bomber soon," Ressler said firmly. "Samar is picking up Max Ruddiger."

"We already have a name," Liz argued. "Karakurt. He's a Russian operative."

"What's a Russian operative doing bombing a political social event?" Ressler murmured.

"Nothing good. Listen, we need to get Liz's wrist looked at-"

"It's fine," she argued. "We have to find this guy before he sets off the second bomb, don't we?" Jacob frowned and she glared. "Anyway, I wasn't the one buried under half the ceiling during the first blast."

Ressler shook his head. "Both of you need to get checked out. It's not going to do anyone any good if something's wrong and you pass out halfway through an arrest." He offered his partner a look and Jacob finally seemed to relent.

"Keep us in the loop."

"Will do. See you both back at the Post Office."

He turned, mind racing and he pulled his cell from his coat and saw half a dozen texts with his fiancé's name attached to them. He held the phone up to his ear as he walked. "Audrey, sweetheart, it's going to be a late night."

* * *

Her husband - ex-husband, Meera still had to remind herself at times, though it wasn't like they saw each other a great deal less after they split than they had when they were together - had brought her to an event or two like this had been over the years. He hadn't been at this one, she knew, but he easily could have and there was something sobering about that. As a CIA field officer, it was her job that landed her in danger more times than not, not his. He certainly earned his share of enemies, but they were along the political lines, not those that would have gotten him killed. She thought that most of the men and women in attendance that night had probably felt the same way right up until the bomb had gone off, and if they were to believe Ruddiger, this was just the warm up.

"Meera Malik, isn't it?"

Meera turned to see a face that she knew, though she'd never met the man directly, and the fact that he was aware of her name set her a little on edge even if it didn't show. "Director Kotsiopulos. Were you in the building?"

"I'd just stepped out for a call when the bomb went off. Best call I've ever taken," he answered with a mirthless chuckle. "I knew your superior, Diane Fowler."

"Yes sir, I'm aware."

"Mm. She always spoke so highly of you. Quite a talented individual from what I hear."

"While I appreciate the compliment sir, I am here on duty."

"Of course, of course. Tell me, how is it working inside the FBI?"

She tilted her head a bit at the wording. "I'm afraid I can't disclose any details, Director, but my team is more than most agents of either agency could hope for."

A thin smile crossed his lips. "Ms Malik, I do hope that you are aware that Diane put you on this team because she trusted you. Turning out results is, of course, expected, but I've heard some unsettling rumours. I would have been speaking to you in the next few days as it stands, because you've been transferred under my purview. Poor Diane has been missing for quite a while now and it simply looks like-"

"I'm sorry sir, but am I being transferred?" Meera demanded.

"My goodness no. You're invaluable where you are. I expect you to remain that way. You've been in limbo without someone within the Agency to report to. That will change. I expect regular reports on the activities. "

"I've been answering to Director Cooper," she pointed out.

"Yes, well, some recent health issues seem to have thrown Assistant Director Cooper's judgment off. Masha Rostova was a gamble at best and a heightened security risk at worst."

"Just to be clear, Director, are you asking me to spy on my team?" Meera asked, hoping to everything that she was wrong.

"I trust that your loyalties to your country are not undermined by this little team that Reddington orchestrated."

Meera bristled a little at the insinuation. "Of course not."

"Wonderful. I'll expect your first report in first thing next week. I'm sure it will take you a bit to collect everything for me. And Ms Malik? I expect your usual level of discretion in this."

"Of course, sir," she answered and turned to walk away.

* * *

Ruddiger was in custody by the time that Jacob and Liz made their way back to the Post Office. They hadn't even taken the time to change. The countdown to the next bomb could be imminent as far as they knew and they had gotten back as soon as they were medically cleared.

"I don't know anything more. I want a lawyer," Ruddiger shouted as Jacob walked into the viewing room where Ressler stood with his arms crossed over his chest.

The younger man joined. "Samar hasn't broken him yet?"

"Not yet. Reddington said the man is a borderline alcoholic, but we don't have time to leave him to dry out."

"You've heard from him?"

"Yeah, about fifteen minutes ago. He's up talking to Cooper now."

"I said I wanted a lawyer," Ruddiger snapped

"You're being held as a terrorist," Samar answered easily, leaning against the table he was cuffed to. "We know that you sold the bombs to a man that calls himself Karakurt. He's a Russian agent with political targets. That makes you an accessory to his crimes."

"I didn't set anything off, and you have no proof I sold them."

"We have photographic evidence of the exchange."

Jacob tilted his head. "She's bluffing, isn't she? I hadn't heard that we got photos."

"You can't tell that she is?" Ressler asked him with a smirk. "Did getting your bell rung mess with your BS meter?"

"No, she's just good. I think I've finally warmed up to her," Jacob mused.

The door opened to the side and Liz walked in, wrist bandaged and red dress still smelling a little like smoke. "Hey," Jacob greeted and she gave him a thin smile.

"Anything yet?"

"If you have something to use against him, now's the time," Ressler said.

"Reddington," she murmured thoughtfully. "Could you make it look like you'd arrested me as well? Put me in there with him and I can scare the hell out of him about Reddington."

Jacob smiled at the idea. "If you can convince him Red's coming after him-"

"-and then you guys threaten to let him go," she finished with a nod. "He'll give anything away he can."

Ressler frowned, turning his gaze on Jacob who shrugged. "It's worth a shot."

His partner nodded after a moment with a sigh and motioned for her to put her hands out as he pulled a pair of cuffs int view.

"Easy with her wrist. The doctor said she-"

"It's fine," Liz cut him off and met Ressler's gaze. "Make it look real."

Jacob watched as his best friend cuffed his wife and led her around and into the interrogation room. Samar looked up, but didn't flinch, even when Liz's expression changed to one of complete rage. Ressler barely caught hold of her as she lunged forward. "Ruddiger, you _bastard_! What the hell did I do to you to have you set us up? You son of a-"

"I didn't! Mags, you gotta believe me. I didn't know!"

Liz eased up on the fight, her glare still piercing through the German bomb maker. "I'm not the one you've got to convince. Reddington gets ahold of you and-"

Ruddiger blinked, like the thought hadn't crossed his mind. "What?"

"Reddington. You obviously are in the works with one of his enemies. You better hope he gives you a chance to explain you didn't know and have a damn good story to back it up. I've heard about some of the things he does to people who screw him. He covered one man with vodka and lit a cigar in his mouth to burn down. These people are nothing, you little two timer. You better hope the FBI has enough to make charges stick."

Ruddiger was staring wide-eyed now, but Jacob wasn't sure if it was because he was afraid for his life or if he was shocked Liz had said so much.

"You made your deal?" Ruddiger managed.

"You think I want Reddington thinking I'm the one that screwed him?" she demanded. "I'd rather make a deal with the feds than deal with him."

The German nodded slowly. "Okay. Okay I get it. I'll tell you what I know about Karakurt."

Samar shot Liz a look, but she didn't budge from her role until Ressler was leading her back into the viewing room. Her scowl almost immediately shifted to a grin. "I'm starting to see why you like this so well, babe."

Jacob smirked. "Kind of a rush, isn't it?"

"Kind of is. I never would have thought so."

"There's two of you," Ressler groaned, throwing his hands up as he passed Jacob

The younger agent grinned and shrugged, causing his friend to roll his eyes. "Let's just take this son of a bitch down."

"Pretty sure that's something we can all agree on."

* * *

"I need you to be straight with me, Red," Harold Cooper said as Reddington closed the door to his office, Dembe taking his silent place in the corner. Reddington no longer worried about Cooper swooping in to arrest him, but he had learned long ago that he preferred Dembe to hear things for himself. The man offered excellent advice, and there were even times when Red took it. Lately it has been a push to be more truthful with Elizabeth and her husband, and now it seemed Cooler was looking for answers as well.

"About what, Harold?"

"Agent Phelps has spoken to me about your fears about the Cabal."

Well that was interesting. And admittedly not the topic Reddington had expected. He took the offered seat when Cooper motioned to it. "What about it?"

"He said that you believe that there is a… shadow agency, of sorts, running behind the scenes. That they're focused in on you and possibly Elizabeth Phelps as well. Is this true?"

"It's true," Reddington answered carefully and watched the assistant director sit back in his chair hard. "Harold-"

"What I'm about to tell you-"

"Stays here," Reddington agreed.

"Agent Malik was approached outside the bombing site by the director of clandestine services."

Reddington stiffened. "Peter Kotsiopulos," he said lowly. He knew the name, and from everything Fitch had indicated before his death - and that the man he had put him in contact with after - Kotsiopulos was near the top of the Cabal's leadership tiers.

"You shouldn't know that name."

"And yet I do. In fact I have quite a file on the man."

Cooper seemed to catch his drift and his shoulders sagged. "I'm not… I'm not certain that Kotsiopulos is the first member of this organisation to look into us."

"McDurren," Red acknowledged, but the look on Cooper's face said much closer. "Connolly."

"Is he?"

"If he is it's a new arrangement. He's a friend of yours, Harold. What makes you suspect him?"

Cooper pulled in a deep breath. "When I was hospitalised the doctors… found something. A tumour. They said it was inoperable and didn't give me long."

"That would explain why you nearly chose not to return."

"I felt I owed it to this team. Agent Phelps was following my orders and it upended everything in his life."

"That's hardly your fault, Harold."

"Even so." He sighed. "Tom Connolly is an old friend, so when he approached me with the option of being enrolled in a clinical trial, it seemed like something a friend would do."

Reddington watched him carefully. "And then he wanted something in return. It always starts with a favour."

"It does. He's leveraged my health. He's even involved Charlene in it all, and the threats…. Who are these people, Red?"

"Dangerous enemies, I assure you. The very worst are those that pose as friends and allies to use that loyalty against you. I am…" He paused, searching for just the right words. "I am deeply sorry this has come to your doorstep, Harold."

"If he had never involved Charlene I wouldn't have thought twice about telling him no, but now it looks like they're looking for other ins. Meera came to me with this just a couple of hours ago."

"And you should send her in."

"Excuse me?"

"Agent Malik. You should send her undercover in the Cabal. If I didn't think she was fully capable of handling herself, I'd never suggest it, but we both know she is. Turning down this opportunity to have someone on the inside will cripple us in the future."

Cooper was staring at him like he's lost his mind. Reddington sighed. "Your own friend has threatened your wife, Harold. They blew up a room full of politicians today to get to _me_. How many lives were lost? How many more will be if you don't do this?"

"How could that be this Cabal? Kotsiopulos was there."

"Quite an alibi. Was he in the building when it went up?"

"He'd stepped out to take a call," Cooper murmured.

"Of course he did. He's made a foolish error of underestimating this team. Underestimating their loyalty to each other. If you trust in Agent Malik's talents, you will send her under."

The two men watched each other for a long moment. "I'll think about it. Kotsiopulos asked her to have information gathered by next week. We need to find this bomber first."

A knock came to the door and Ressler stuck his head in. "We have a lead on Karakurt, sir. Bomb squad is mobilising and with your permission we'd like to take this son of a bitch down."

"Go get him," Cooper answered and when the door was closed again he looked back to Reddington who was fitting his hat back in his head.

"If you want to protect them, Harold, we need to play all the angles. Meera with the Director and you in with Connolly." His gaze caught movement below. "Speaking of."

"Go. He's here for a report after the bombing."

"Imagine that. And Harold? If there's… anything I can do for you in regards to your medical condition…"

"Keep it between us."

Reddington nodded, ignoring Connolly as he and Dembe took their exit.

* * *

Jacob winced a little as he pressed his back against the wall, catching his partner's attention. "You said you were cleared," Ressler said in a hushed tone. They were following part of the lead Ruddiger's information had provided. The bomb squad, led by Meera and Samar, was tracking down the bomb that Ruddiger had said was set to go off during peak hours on the subway. Meanwhile, Jacob and Ressler were leading the team into the last known location for Karakurt, and it seemed like the last moment before they breached the apartment was when his partner decided to inquire about his health.

"I was. Excuse me for being sore. A building fell on me. Are you ready?"

Ressler levelled a glare at him and Jacob answered with an expectant look. The fair haired agent rolled his eyes and together they moved in, guns raised, and into the apartment. They had barely announced themselves when Jacob saw a flash of movement and darted after it. "He's heading out the fire escape!"

"We'll just… Jake!" Ressler yelled after him, but Jacob was halfway out the window, the stiffness from the earlier explosion pushed aside by the adrenaline spike. He spotted Karakurt halfway down the ladder and followed, hitting bottom as the guy jumped into a car and revved the engine.

Jacob looked over at a couple of officers that were staring. "What the hell are you good for?" he growled.

"Keys!" Ressler shouted and the officer tossed them over, still sort of dazed. "Come on."

"Oh no you don't. I'm driving, just this once. You'll never catch up to him!"

"Or we could sit here all day and argue about it while he gets away."

Jacob growled under his breath and piled into the passenger's seat. "You know what? I've figured it out. You have control issues. That's why you have to drive all the time."

"I drive all the time because I don't want to die," Ressler answered as he kicked the SUV into gear, slamming on the accelerator. "Kick the lights on will you?"

"I'm serious," Jacob answered as the lights started flashing and the siren began to wail. They sped through the streets of DC that were, thankfully, mostly deserted at this hour. "You have to be in control. It would drive you nuts if anyone but you ever took the lead on a case, or drove the car that you were in, or-"

"Are we seriously having this conversation _now_?"

"Well we're already losing the perp, so yeah, seems as good of a time as any," Jacob snapped back, throwing his hands in the air. He looked around as Ressler took a hard right turn, the tires squealing. "Where the hell are you going?"

"I know a shortcut."

"No you don't. This isn't- A shortcut to _where_ , exactly?"

"You know what I think?"

"I don't really care," Jacob huffed, sliding hard into the door as they took another hard turn. "Ouch."

"I think you have an underlying need to argue. You could be right, you could be wrong, but you have to win the argument."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "At least I didn't lose the bomber that's trying to blow a hole in the transit system! Where the hell are we going, Ress? He's not-"

"And when you're losing an argument or can't make a valid argument against it, you try to turn it around on the person. Seatbelt on?"

"Yeah, why?" He risked a glance over to Ressler about the time that they burst out of the alleyway they had been driving through, nearly slamming into Karakurt's vehicle. The Russian agent swerved and so did Ressler, and Jacob braced himself as the SUV's nose slammed into the other car. They hit hard, spinning both of them and flipping Karakurt's smaller vehicle.

Both FBI agents piled out of the SUV, guns drawn and shouting. Karakurt pulled himself out of the window of the driver's side of the car, hands raised in the air. Ressler glanced over. "See? Short cut."

"You still crashed the car!"

"Not like you would have."

"Seriously? That's your defence?" He watched Ressler step forward, cuffs pulled out. "You know, I didn't think I could hurt a lot more after having a roof fall in on me. Thank you for proving me wrong."

"You're welcome."

"Sarcasm."

"Couldn't tell."

Jacob rolled his eyes and waved his partner, who had started grinning at him now, off as he stepped to the side to answer his cell phone that had started ringing in his pocket. "Phelps."

" _Agent Phelps, it's Aram. Um, you and Agent Ressler might want to get back to the Post Office as quick as you can. I think there's someone here from the CIA trying to arrest Liz for the bombing tonight._ "

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: <deep breath> So. Last night. Did anyone hear me screaming and cursing from Texas? If you didn't, I'm shocked. I was certain that they wouldn't add the pregnancy. I have a very personal emotional involvement with their want to adopt. It's one of the things that drew me to them as a couple. Not to mention that it's horrible timing for them. I've gone on a lot of rants today. If you're on Tumblr, I'm sure you've seen some lol

I'm going to try to refrain from doing so here. I love Keen2. I love Jacob. That precious look when he proposed needs to go on my computer background.

Next time - The Director tries to pin the bombing on Liz, and Jacob let's his emotions get involved in the interrogation of Karakurt.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

"What the hell is going on?" Jacob demanded as he and Ressler strode into the Post Office, Karakurt cuffed between them. He heard his partner hand the terrorist off to be put in holding, but Jacob's attention was focused in on new faces.

"Agent Phelps," Reven Wright said as she stepped forward, reaching out as if she thought that was going to do anything to calm his temper. They had been running at this all night long and all he wanted to do was come by, pick Liz up, go home, and go to bed, but no. Apparently some idiot chose to pick _now_ to stir the waters. Again.

"What's going on?"

"Hello. You must be the husband I've heard so much about."

Jacob turned, finding the man with greying hair that Liz had been speaking to at the party. "Who the hell are you?"

"Agent Phelps," Cooper growled, shooting him a look of warning.

"No, it's quite alright, Assistant Director. I understand that Agent Phelps has had a trying time of things. Finding out that your wife is a spy… Difficult times, I'm sure."

Jacob's jaw clenched irritably and he felt Ressler take a step closer to him.

The grey haired man smiled thinly. "Peter Kotsiopulos, Director of Clandestine Services. We're here to assess the situation with Miss Rostova."

"She's already been assessed," Ressler said sharply.

Kotsiopulos' gaze flickered to him only momentarily. "That was before she was at the crime scene of a bombing."

"She was helping with the case," Jacob snapped. "Of course she was there! That's her _job_ now."

"Easy, Phelps," Cooper said quietly. "Director Kotsiopulos is covering basis. No one is taking Liz from this facility."

"I wouldn't be certain about that," the Director answered.

"Regardless, nothing will be decided for another few hours," Cooper said firmly. "My people have been out all night making sure a madman didn't bomb the subway. We all need some sleep. Elizabeth Phelps will remain here-"

"Sir, you can't-"

Cooper shot him another look. "She will remain here, and you, Director, will come back around… say ten? Then your men may question her here."

Kotsiopulos bristled. "I don't want to pull rank on you-"

"We're different divisions, Director, and you're in _my_ facility."

Jacob barely breathed as he watched the silent power struggle between the two men. Finally, the Director relented. "We'll be back at ten. I expect that you'll be working with us and not against us, Agent Cooper."

"Of course," Cooper answered with a thin smile.

No one said anything until the CIA officers were gone. The lift door had barely closed when Jacob whirled on his boss. "This is insane. She was there to help. She got the intel that got us the real bomber!"

"I understand, Agent Phelps, but you're going to have to prove that. Agent Ressler, you look dead on your feet. Go home. Get some sleep. You as well, Agent Merik."

"I'm good to stay a bit longer to start in on Karakurt with Phelps," Samar offered.

"Good. If you two could come in and relieve Phelps and Navabi in a few hours?"

"You need me to stay?" Ressler asked lowly, the question pointed at his partner.

"No. We have this. Go see Audrey."

He gave a hesitant nod before turning to leave. Jacob looked to Cooper. "Can I see her at least?"

"She's in the same holding room we had her in last time. We'll get to the bottom of this."

Jacob nodded slowly and glanced over to Samar. "I'll be in in a few minutes to help with Karakurt."

"Take your time."

He moved down the hall quickly, mind racing against exhaustion and the lingering pain from being caught in an explosion just hours before. He typed his credentials in and the door opened, revealing Liz sitting on the cot with her knees pulled up to her chest. Well, at least they had let her shower and change. It was more than he had gotten.

Liz's expression brightened. "Jacob?"

"Hey, babe," he greeted roughly and she was up in an instant, her arms around his neck and her face buried in his chest. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"For what?"

"This. It's stupid. How're you supposed to work if every time something goes wrong they think it's you?"

Somehow a smile crossed her face. "But you believe me."

Jacob blinked. He did. He really did. He hadn't even questioned her innocence. "We have Karakurt. I'm going to fix this, Lizzie. We're going to fix this."

His wife tipped up on her toes and pulled him into a kiss. He melted into it willingly. "I trust you," she whispered when they broke, "and I love you."

"Love you too," he answered and kissed her again. "Time to go break a Russian agent."

"Be careful. This… I don't know. Something's off about it."

"Something's been off about the whole thing. Reddington wasn't here when we got back, but I'd bet you anything he has answers."

"Imagine that," Liz huffed.

He reached out, his fingers touching her face and she leaned into it. "Love you," he said again before he turned. It was time to get answers. He had just gotten her back. He wasn't letting go now.

* * *

A sigh escaped him as Ressler shuffled into the apartment, surprised to find a small lamp still on. As he moved further in he saw Audrey curled up on the couch, a book on the floor next to her, and she was sleeping soundly. He stood there for a moment, a smile finally taking hold as he watched her sleep. She'd been trying to wait up for him, even though he had told her he would likely be very late and to stay indoors at all costs. She'd listened to half of that at least.

Ressler moved to pull a blanket up around her shoulders and Audrey stirred. Dark eyes fluttered open and she smiled. "Hey, stranger," she greeted. "Get your guy?"

"Yeah."

She sat up a little, making room for him to join her. "You don't sound happy about that. Is something wrong?"

He sighed and took a heavy seat next to her. "I can't go into details, but another agency is trying to link the bombing to Liz."

"She didn't do it, did she?"

Ressler paused for a moment before shaking his head. "No, I don't think she had anything to do with it."

"Well then you and Jake will prove that. Poor guy. How's he doing?"

"He's Jake. Barrelling forward until he crashes out."

Audrey cringed and wrapped her arms around him. Ressler sank into her hold and felt tense muscles begin to loosen. After a few moments he pulled in a breath to speak. "You wanted to talk about something over dinner tonight."

"Well, bomb threats trump dinner?" She laughed and kissed his cheek.

He smiled tiredly. "What was it?"

"It's just… With everything going on… Your job, the baby, and… Well, everything, I guess, I really want to have the wedding before rather than after our child comes."

Ressler blinked at her. "That's a lot of preparation in a short time. Your folks-"

"They're already put out. It doesn't matter. I don't need a big wedding. I just need you. Something small? Maybe just family?"

He offered her a smile. "That's going to be kind of one sided," he murmured.

"Well, your team is like your family, aren't they? My side, your side, and it'll be small and quiet. I'd really like that."

"Me too," Ressler confessed softly, leaning in and resting his forehead against hers.

"Then let's do it. Will you let Liz come too? For Jake?"

Ressler snorted. "Are you sure?"

"She probably feels pretty lonely about now. She's not so bad."

He shook his head and pressed a kiss to her lips. "I don't deserve you," he answered. "Anything you want, sweetheart. Just name it. Big wedding, small. Just family or the whole world. Just as long as I get to marry you."

She grinned. "Well look at you," she cheered. "Sleepy and romantic."

"I can be romantic," he grumbled and she stood, still smiling at him.

"When you want to be," Audrey agreed, pulling him towards the bedroom. He only had a few hours, but he knew he wanted to spend them with her.

* * *

They were running out of time and Karakurt wasn't budging. Samar had kicked Jacob out of the room twice already and he was left pacing the mostly-empty halls of the Post Office. His footsteps echoed, the dress shoes he was still wearing starting to make his feet hurt. He stopped when he reached the main room and found Aram bent over his terminal working away at something. "I need a favour."

Aram looked up, startled. "Uh… Sure?"

"Cut the feeds to the interrogation room."

He blinked at the field agent. "I'm sorry… What?"

"Cut the feeds. I'll let you know when to bring them back up."

"Are you-?"

"We're running out of time. I'm doing what I have to. Will you help or not?"

Aram stared at him for a long moment before nodding. "Of course." His fingers flew over the keyboard. "Done."

"I owe you," Jacob said as he started back down the hall. He burst into the interrogation room without warning. Samar looked up and Jacob glanced up to the camera, watching her gaze follow and the realization that it was off flicker through her eyes. "You trust me?" he asked.

Samar leaned back against the wall, arms crossed. "He's all yours."

Karakurt looked up at him as Jacob started to roll back the tattered sleeves of the shirt he was wearing. "This used to be a nice shirt," he told the older man. "Then you decided to set a bomb off with my team and me inside of the building. Let me tell you something. Agent Navabi over there is a well trained interrogator. She'll have you confessing the truth before you even realize you've opened your mouth. The thing is, I haven't slept tonight because I was chasing you, I'm in a hell of a lot of pain because you set off a bomb, and you've put my wife in the crosshairs of people that want to lock her up. Navabi is good, but this is personal for me."

Karakurt gave a low chuckle. "You're a federal agent. You can't touch me."

Jacob popped him hard in the mouth, the blow leaving him bloodied and tilting dangerously in his chair. "I'm really bad at following rules. Listen, I'm going to make this easy on you. There's no camera on. I'll beat you to a pulp and uncuff you after so it looks like you came after us."

Karakurt cursed lowly in Russian and Jacob answered in the same, smirking at him. "Max Ruddiger sold you out. Now it's time to do the same and save your own skin in return. Who sent you? The SVR? The Cabal?" Jacob watched as the name that had rolled of his tongue with strange ease caused the Russian man to flinch. He leaned in, goading him. "Yeah? Are you just another dog on their leash. I'll tell you what I've learned about these guys is that they don't protect their own. They use you and dispose of you. We're your best hope for getting out of here."

Karakurt's dark eyes flickered up and he mumbled something lowly. Jacob leaned in, trying to hear, and he was knocked back hard, his head aching dangerously where they had collided. He blinked hard and heard Samar shift behind him, but he was already moving, ripping the folding chair Karakurt was seated on out from under him and he slammed it into the man's head hard, sending him jerking against the handcuffs hard as he sagged down.

"Phelps," Samar said sharply, gaining his attention.

"I'm not done," he growled and she held up her phone.

"Company's here. Yes you are or you'll lose your badge." She moved forward and Jacob saw her pull a key out, uncuffing Karakurt so that he slumped hard to the floor, still dazed.

The door to the interrogation room opened and Cooper stared, Director Kotsiopulos' gaze falling in Karakurt. "Is this how your task force works?"

"He got free and took a swing at me," Jacob said stiffly and shot him a look that dared him to argue.

"I'm sure he did," Kotsiopulos answered. "You'll be happy to know that the higher ups believe we don't have a case on your wife just yet. With the chip that she already has implanted in her through the deal with this task force, she will remain in your custody. Karakurt, on the other hand, will come with us."

Jacob's eyes widened and his gaze shifted to Cooper, who held a hand up to stop the protest. "Karakurt for Rostova. That's the way it is, Agent Phelps."

"Can't have everything," Kotsiopulos said cheerfully. He frowned at the look he received in return. "I'm sorry, Agent Phelps. Do we have a problem?"

Blue eyes flickered to where Samar had gotten Karakurt up. "No," he bit out.

"Good. I'll be in touch, Agent Cooper, should anything about your case come up."

Jacob stood completely still as Kotsiopulos and his me. Led the woozy terrorist out. He managed to bite his tongue until he was sure they were out of earshot. "What the hell does the CIA-"

"Imminent foreign threat," Cooper said blandly.

"And you believe that?"

"About as much as I believe that Karakurt got free and you were defending yourself," his superior snapped. His expression softened just a little then. "Or that your wife was responsible. Take her home, Jacob, get cleaned up, and get some rest. This isn't over." He lowered his voice, leaning in just a little so that only Jacob could hear him. "Reddington believes Kotsiopulos is part of the Cabal. Watch your back."

"Yes sir," Jacob said quietly. He left the interrogation room without another word, risking only a brief _thank you_ to Aram as he passed by.

* * *

Kelly had been at their house when they got home. Surprisingly enough after she offered Jacob a hug, she turned to Liz and put her arms around her. "How are you?"

"Holding," Liz managed, and sometimes she still wondered how Jacob had gotten so lucky.

Kelly stayed to fix them a very late breakfast or early lunch before she left them to themselves for some hard earned rest before they would have to start all over again the next day.

Liz watched her husband's movements as he shoved food in his mouth and then started for the stairs sluggishly. She set her plate aside and caught him halfway up the stairs. "Jacob?"

He turned, his expression exhausted, but he reached a hand out to her and she took it, following him up. "Cooper said that Reddington thinks that the Director of Clandestine Services that was trying to take you is part of the Cabal."

"You think Red was right then? This was orchestrated?"

"I think that Karakurt was more afraid of someone else than of me, and I gave him every reason to be afraid of me," her husband answered as he started to peel off his tattered clothes. Liz had gotten a shower and a change out of her singed red dress at the Post Office, but Jacob hadn't stopped long enough. He looked like he was feeling every inch of it at that moment.

She stepped forward as he tossed the ruined shirt in the garbage, inspecting the bruises that were showing against his exposed skin. Somehow he hadn't managed to end up on the receiving end of any real damage, but the bruises were going to hurt for a while.

"I'm okay," he promised and caught her hand as she reached for him. "How's the wrist?"

"It's fine."

He pulled in a heavy breath, his hand gently taking hers and pressing a kiss to her bandages wrist. "You going to be okay if I go take a shower?"

She offered him a smile. "I'm a big girl, Jacob. If they bring the fight to our home, they're not leaving it alive."

He looked startled by half a moment before the words pulled a smirk out of him and he kissed her. "I love you. I'll be out in a few."

She watched him as he turned and started for the bathroom. She didn't loose a breath until the water started, but once it has she was ready to throw herself on the bed and try to sort things out.

Hudson gave a loud bark as he suddenly started for the stairs, claws scraping against the wood floors. Liz grabbed for her husband's spare firearm and followed carefully. She got the bottom stair, finding the house empty, but spun to find Raymond Reddington with his hands raised. "It's just me, Elizabeth."

She glared. "What has Jacob told you about walking in without knocking?" she growled.

"Forgive me for not wanting to linger in the open longer than necessary. Where is your husband?"

"In the shower. He hasn't stopped since the bombing."

"No one can fault his focus," Reddington sighed. "How are you, Lizzie?"

She tensed at the name. "Wanting answers more than ever now."

"I imagine you are. I'm sorry that you were wrapped up into all of this. I never meant-"

"Save it." He gave her a funny look and she frowned, thinking of the bunny and the blackmail file they couldn't read. She had told him that she had found it, and now she needed to find a way to backtrack on that, otherwise he was going to want it then and there. "It's not going to do us any good. We can't change that, only protect ourselves moving forward. How?"

Reddington's gaze flickered to the stairs. "I take it you still won't be convinced to leave him?"

"No."

"Well then. I suppose we're in this fight together, aren't we?"

Liz watched him carefully as he took a seat on her couch, Hudson putting his chin up on his knee as if he expected something. She took the chair opposite of him so that she could still see the stairs. "Tell me about my mother. How did you know her?"

Reddington looked over. "We met… not a great deal differently from you and Agent Phelps. I was in Naval Intelligence at the time and she was… a legend, even by that point." His expression was distant, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he spoke about Katarina Rostova.

"What was she like?" Liz ventured, not willing to let the moment pass. She scooted forward in the chair, leaned so that she could listen to every word.

"She was blonde, with the most dazzling blue eyes. Yours. You have your mother's eyes."

Liz smiled a little, but then it faded. "Bud told me she left me to die in the fire."

Reddington tensed a little. "She most certainly did not. Your mother loved you very dearly, Elizabeth. She used to say you were the only thing left untainted in her life."

"What happened to her?"

He closed his eyes, settling back on the couch. "I wish I knew, Lizzie. I thought I did, for many years, but just like with you so many of the rumours proved false. If she is alive, she doesn't wish to be found. Perhaps she thought it was safer that way."

"What about my father?"

Blue eyes opened, but there was such a loathing in them that Liz had to sit back. "I never cared much for the man. He didn't treat your mother as she deserved."

"So you're not…?" Her voice was small, almost embarrassed.

He offered her a thin smile. "No," he answered, his voice weak like he weren't quite sure it was the answer he wanted to give.

"I hope you came with information," Jacob said, pulling both their attentions to the stairs as he walked down them, cleaning his glasses on his t-shirt.

Reddington cleared his throat. "Yes, I do. I have been piecing together a plan. The Director's insistence on sticking his nose in the middle of things is bad enough, but he went as far as to attack American politicians and leaders, hiding behind the Russians. He'll continue to try to pin it on Elizabeth to draw me out. Soon, though, I'll have the pressure to apply right back."

"Your blackmail file?" Liz murmured.

"I have all the keys to make it work except for one."

"The file itself," Jacob said, drawing Red's attention. "The fact that you don't have it is what makes you so nervous about all of this. I bet Kotsiopulos knows too."

"I've bought time, but you're right. I need the file." He turned towards Elizabeth.

"What?" she asked innocently.

"You said you found it."

She blinked at him, a lie falling from her tongue instead of the truth. "I needed answers, Reddington, and you've been holding back. I may have been exaggerating."

He sighed, not buying it. "The bunny, Elizabeth. The one you had as a small girl. There was nothing of it left after the fire. It never left your side."

"I'm sorry, but I don't know what bunny you're talking about ," Liz lied with perfect confidence.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I feel like I ask this a lot, but I get very nervous when reviews take a dip from their normal numbers. I just want to make sure everyone's still enjoying the story. I know I'm still having a blast writing it, but I post it for you guys :)

Next time - Meera finds some troubling news and the Cabal takes an aggressive step towards bringing in Elizabeth Phelps.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

Meera Malik stood in the waiting area just outside of Director Peter Kotsiopulos' office. She had spoken to Harold Cooper and Reddington about it, and she had taken the assignment after being fully briefed. She and Reddington had had a very serious conversation about having _all_ of the facts before going under, and he had been surprisingly compliant with the demand. That had led her to where she stood that Monday evening, a thumb drive in her purse that, according to records, never left the Post Office.

"Meera?"

She turned, startled by the last voice she would have expected there. "David. What are you doing here?"

Her ex-husband flashed her a smile. "I've been working with Director Kotsiopulos on some legal concerns recently. The firm has had me on loan for the last three months. He didn't mention that you were stopping by."

"He wouldn't have," she answered tightly.

David offered a slow smile. "Let me guess? Classified?"

"A bit, yes," she answered slowly.

"I guess this means we'll be seeing more of each other."

"Agent Malik," Peter Kotsiopulos greeted as he strode into the room. "Ah, I suppose you already know Mr Ellis, don't you? I hope this won't be a problem."

"Why would it be?" she answered evenly.

Kotsiopulos smirked and motioned for her to follow him in. "Good seeing you, Meera," her ex said and she nodded.

"You have something for me, I believe," Kotsiopulos said.

"The information you requested, yes." Meera pulled the jump drive and handed it over. "Sir, I don't believe a great deal in coincidences."

"I'm sorry?"

"David."

"Well, he's one of the best legal minds on the hill. He's on the fast track to becoming a judge, but I'm sure you know that. He will likely be working very closely on a variety of issues for the duration of your time undercover with Cooper's team."

He wasn't saying it, but it was clear enough. David was there as insurance. "Is there anything else you need, sir?"

"Full files on this team of yours. I need details that wouldn't be provided to me in a cursory search. Masha Rostova and this husband of hers, especially. I hear he has something of a juvenile record that isn't readily available."

"Are we still building a case on her for the bombings?"

"We are exploring a variety of avenues," the director answered. "I'll be in touch."

Meera nodded, turning to leave. Kotsiopulos had David close as insurance in case her loyalty to her team was stronger than her ability to blindly follow his orders. She and her ex had had their share of trouble over the years, but he had been the reason she had made the move permanently to the US. He was the father of her children. If she were honest, there were plenty of feelings still there, even if they fought like mad when they were around each other too long. The kind of secrets they each had to keep for their separate line of works could do that to anyone.

She risked a glance back to where David was entering the office she had just left. She had thought it couldn't be more complicated, and she'd only been proven wrong.

* * *

"This isn't our guy," Liz said as she leaned over Aram's shoulder, peering at the photo of the potential suspect. It was late and they had been at this for hours. It seemed like they were moving further from the answer rather than closer.

"What makes you so certain?" Samar asked from her desk. "He has the right contacts, the right skill set-"

"Problem is that he's dead." All eyes turned on her and Liz offered a shrug.

"My contacts at Mossad would know if he were," Samar argued.

"Not if the body was never found and his younger brother looks enough like him to pass at a distance."

"Then how do you know?"

Liz flashed her an innocent expression. "If you're asking me if I committed a murder or was was aware that someone else had, I think I'd rather just settle on saying that I have connections and that's why I'm here."

"Have I mentioned recently that you're a little scary sometimes?" Aram asked, his voice bordering on teasing even though she could tell that he was at least halfway serious.

"It's okay. You've been nice," she offered with a playful smile.

A light on his computer started flashing and he leaned in to examine it. Before he could say anything, Cooper was halfway down the stairs of his office. "Aram, lock things down."

Liz looked up, the question about to leave her tongue as the lights kicked off. The room was thrown into darkness for a moment until the generator came on, and Cooper was already downstairs, having received some sort of warning. She turned a look at him. "What's going on?"

"We've been breached. Surveillance videos caught site of a team making their way in."

"Phone lines are down," Aram announced.

"Get them back up," Cooper ordered. "Navabi, take Ms Phelps to the box."

Liz's eyes widened. "I didn't have anything to do with this!"

"Less than a week after we stop this Cabal's director for taking you into custody our black site is found and accessed? Nothing is that coincidental. This is for your safety." He paused, gaze sweeping the mostly empty area. "Where're Phelps and Ressler?"

"They went to grab dinner and bring it back," Aram said, his expression worried. "You don't think they-"

"They're trained agents. They'll be fine. Samar, get her to that box. We're not letting these people get her."

Liz stared. "Do you have footage of this guy? If we know who we're fighting, we'll stand a better chance." Samar reached out for her and she ducked away. " _No_. If they're after me, I'm fighting this with you. I won't just hide away."

The doors burst open and the four of them turned to see a man that Liz recognized, but had had never met personally, walk through the door. Tall and broad, she had heard stories about Luther Braxton. He was a thief. This made no sense.

"You can put your weapons down," Braxton said, motioning to Samar. "You're more than outnumbered. Not a good night to work late." His gaze turned to Liz who kept her expression neutral. "Masha Rostova. You don't look like much."

"Come over here and we'll see if you feel that way."

"We'll make this easy," Braxton said, motioning for his men to move around to make sure none if the agents tried anything. One hauled Aram out of his chair roughly, and he turned wide, frightened eyes towards her. Braxton stepped closer. "You have something called the Fulcrum. I want it."

Liz blinked at him. "I don't know what that is."

He smirked. "We'll see."

* * *

"I've got something I need to talk to you about," Ressler said as they entered the lift, bags of take out in hand for everyone that was working hard on the case.

"That sounds serious," his partner quipped with a grin, pressing the button and the lift jolted into motion.

"Audrey wants to have the wedding Saturday."

Jacob turned towards him and gave him that blank sort of way that always left Ressler wondering if he had heard him right. He gave it a moment, and when there was no reaction Ressler settled for a smirk. "You okay?"

"Wait. You guys moved the wedding up? Where have you _been_ , Ress? We're looking at the Cabal coming in and after Liz, probably our whole team, and-"

"And there's always going to be something, Jake," Ressler sighed. "Audrey doesn't ask me for a lot, but she wants the wedding now. We've already called all the right people and gotten things squared away. She doesn't want anything big and fancy, just family and-"

Jacob blinked at him. "So am I not even coming?"

No matter how intelligent Ressler knew he was, there were times when things went right over his friend's head. He rolled his eyes. "Of course you're coming," he grumbled. "You're my best man, and I shouldn't have to tell _you_ blood doesn't make family."

A slow, slightly mischievous smile tilted his friend's lips. "You see me as family, Ress? So, what am I? Distant cousin that drops by all the time or-"

Ressler snorted. "Don't be stupid. You're the closest thing to a brother I've ever had." He looked away. "There is no reason to make a big deal out of this."

"Same, Ress," his friend answered softly, most of the teasing washed out of his voice. The grin didn't return until Ressler turned back to look at him. "See, now you'll never get rid of me."

"It's not like the whole team isn't invited," Ressler grumbled and Jacob feigned hurt.

"Way to ruin the moment, partner."

He cleared his throat. "I'm good at that, apparently. Listen, Audrey-"

The lift jolted to a stop and the lights flickered out. Both men looked at each other. "Seriously?" Jacob grumbled and reached for the comm system.

Ressler caught him by the wrist, straining his ears. "Listen."

They stood in silence for a moment until the sound of gunshots in the hallways below became more clear. "Someone broke into the Post Office," Jacob breathed, dropping the food to the floor. "We've got a skeleton crew at this hour. It won't take them long to blow through them."

"If they got in, they're professionals," Ressler agreed. "Give me a boost?"

Jacob blinked at him. "Say again?"

"We can go up and out through the elevator shaft. You're taller. Give me a boost."

"Taller by like two inches."

"Which you've pointed out to me pretty regularly for the last ten years of our friendship. Are you going to help or not?"

Jacob snorted and knelt down to give himself leverage. "You know I have a bad back, right?"

"You're cleared for field duty. You're fine."

It took a moment, but Ressler got up to the ceiling, removed the barrier, and crawled out. Jacob followed, barely giving Ressler a chance to help pull him up and the two moved as quietly as they could out of the shaft.

"They're after Liz," Jake said as they landed, their shoes making more noise than either of them were comfortable with.

"You don't know that."

"Are you kidding? Kotsiopulos gave them a free pass and is hoping to knock us off in the process. It's a win-win for him. He was probably hoping to catch Reddington here."

"Where's he been, anyway?"

"Throwing a tantrum," Jacob huffed. "He thinks Liz and I are lying to him."

"Are you?" His partner blinked, pulling a soft chuckle from him. "You know the innocent look never has fooled me, right?"

Jacob smirked, but both men jumped back as bullets filled the space. Ressler jerked behind a pole for cover before diving for the corner of a hallway, pulling his own firearm to return fire. He couldn't spot Jake, but he hoped at least one of the guns firing was his. He needed to get him over to where he was. If he could, at least for the moment, they had an escape route.

Ressler risked a look around the corner to return fire and found himself thrown hard to the ground. It took half a beat for the pain to follow, but when it did his left shoulder felt like it was being ripped apart. He gave a pained sound, barely looking up as one of their attackers kicked the gun from his right hand. His vision blurred dangerously as he looked up, watching the gun aimed at him to fire again.

* * *

Jacob rolled out of the way, dodging the bullets that were coming his way. He barely caught sight of one man going down before a bullet pinging too close for comfort had him ducking back down for cover.

He pressed his back against the machinery that he didn't entirely trust to stop a bullet and forced himself to breathe. There were three, he was fairly certain. That meant now there were two. He listened carefully before leaning around, shooting towards the sound of boots on the floor. He heard a satisfying thump and popped back up, spotting the third man standing over his partner.

The shot was off in an instant and the man down. Jacob didn't even check to make sure it was clear before racing across the space. "Ress? Ressler. C'mon, man, open your eyes."

Ressler gave a short, pained cough as he came around and Jacob loosed a breath, turning his attention to his friend's bloody shoulder. He started peeling his jacket off and pressed it against the wound. "Easy," he coaxed. "Easy, Ress. You're okay. You're fine."

"Sound like you're convincing yourself," his friend said with a pained smirk.

Jacob tried to return it. "They're going to have heard all that. Can you move?"

Ressler grimaced as he shifted and Jacob moved to help ease him up. He immediately sagged against him. They weren't getting far like this. His partner needed medical help, which didn't look like they were going to get very easily.

"Go."

"What?"

"They're after Liz. Go."

"If you think I'm leaving you you're nuts."

Ressler gave a low chuckle. "We're asking for it like this. You can move better-"

"Shut up," Jacob growled. "I'm not leaving you."

The final argument seemed to do it. That or Ressler was in too much pain to argue with him any longer. Jacob tightened his hold around him and they started down the hall, his friend leaning heavily on him. There was a supply closet somewhere along the hallway they were in, he was almost certain. There was a chance that there would be something that he could use to stop the bleeding.

Jacob froze as he heard shuffling at the far end of the hall, and he strained to hear more. When he didn't they started forward again until they found the door he was looking for. He eased Ressler down into the floor, receiving a pained sound for the effort, and started digging through the drawers.

"Jake?"

"Yeah?" the younger man answered as he continued his search. They really needed to keep things better organized.

Ressler didn't say anything for a moment, and when Jacob turned he saw his expression was tense. "Talk to me, buddy," he prompted.

Blue eyes fluttered back open. "Audrey wants Liz at the wedding."

He was talking. That seemed like a good sign. "How about you?"

Ressler snorted. "It's important to you, right?"

"Yeah," Jacob answered softly, fingers finally closing on a first aid kit. "Got it. We're you to get you patched up."

Ressler leaned his head back and it gave a soft _thump_ on the cabinet behind him.

"Liz is still pretty fond of you, you know."

"That's surprising. Why?"

Jacob worked carefully and quickly to tug his jacket off without jarring his injured shoulder too badly and pull the shirt away. "You've always got my back." He winced at the site of the mess the bullet had left. "Good news, it missed your collar bone. That hurts like hell."

"You never would shut up about it," Ressler chuckled, tensing as Jacob started to clean some of the blood away. "Got you a trip home for a while though."

Jacob smirked. It was good to know that his partner was with it enough to follow his train of thought all the way back to their days chasing after Reddington. "Yeah. I think Liz regretted offering to help me out with that. We'd just started dating." He felt his partner tense again as he pressed gauze against the wound. "I don't see an exit wound, Ress."

"Less bleeding," the older man managed.

"That looking on the bright side. C'mon, I need you to lean forward." He was careful as he wrapped the gauze into place, but Ressler couldn't stop the pained sound that escaped him and both men froze, looking towards the door. If anyone were in the hallway, they would have heard it.

After several still beats, Jacob finished what he was doing and helped Ressler ease his shirt back over it. "I'm going to check the hall, and if it's clear we'll go, okay?"

He waited until Ressler gave a drowsy nod and stood, reaching for his gun as he eased the door open. He found the barrel of another gun in his face as he did, and he didn't have a chance to raise his own weapon. Slowly he handed it over and kept his hands visible.

"Name?" the man demanded.

"Phelps."

He turned briefly to his cohorts. "We've got the husband and another agent. Tell Braxton we're bringing them up." He turned a smirk on Jacob. "You're going to help us get your wife to talk."

* * *

There weren't many times in which Raymond Reddington allowed himself to sink too deeply into the past. It was dangerous, especially in these days, but he had found himself desperate for something kinder since Elizabeth had so blatantly lied to him, choosing distrust after he had given her what he could about her mother. It was a difficult position they found themselves in and the last thing he wanted was to be the one to hurt her in the end.

He had settled in that evening with a glass of scotch and a film that played out on the projector in a halted fashion. It didn't matter, though, not with the subject matter. The child on the screen laughed and smiled, carefree and innocent with her bubbles and a yard in which to run until she tired herself out. Those were simpler days, no matter how complicated they may have seemed then. So often he found himself missing them.

"Raymond."

Red turned, finding Dembe standing at the door and he offered a sad sort of smile. "It's hard to believe she's all grown up, isn't it?" His friend's expression didn't soften and Reddington straightened a little in his chair. "What is it? What's happened?"

"I just received word. Luther Braxton has taken the Post Office."

His expression didn't waver, but Reddington felt his chest constrict. "Does the FBI know yet?"

"No. Should I send in an anonymous tip?"

"Absolutely not. They'll only get her killed. Call Baz. Set up a team."

Dembe didn't wait a moment, but turned with his phone already pressed to his ear as if he'd already known what his orders would be. Reddington lingered only half a moment after he had left before standing and hurling his scotch glass across the room in a rare fit of rage. The Cabal knew who she was and when they couldn't get to her through their usual means, they sent someone like Braxton after her. He wouldn't stand for it. He'd deliver the man's head to Kotsiopoulos if that's what it took.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: You guys are amazing. I don't think I say that enough. I'm sorry this chapter has been a bit delayed. Life's been crazy and stuff keeps jumping in the way.

 

Next time - Braxton takes Liz, Red and Jacob team up to go after her, and Liz is a badass.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

Ressler had gone too quiet and it was making Jacob nervous. He kept trying to get a look behind him, but every time his captors would push him roughly forward. They had his hands bound with zip ties and one man had a rough hold on his collar, keeping him faced forward and moving. His gun was gone and these people had somehow infiltrated the Post Office. Unless Cooper or one of the others had gotten an alert out before the lines were cut, there was a good chance that no one knew it had happened. They were there late that night and only a skeleton crew was on hand. As far as Jacob could tell as they walked down the hallways, many of those men and women had simply been put down. Apparently they were looking for specific people and he and Ressler had met some criteria. Just like he'd expected, they were after Liz.

They turned a corner and Jacob recognized the hall that led towards the main section of the Post Office. He was shoved through the door and the first thing he saw was his wife strung up by her wrists by a chain tossed over a low-hanging pipe. She was already bruised, standing on her toes to keep her feet on the floor, and her gaze flickered over as soon as he entered, meeting his, and immediately Jacob started fighting his captors. He managed to get a solid blow, hearing something in the man's face crack, before they slammed him to the ground, a boot pressing against his back hard and he could barely see them dragging Ressler over to cuff him to the work stations with Cooper, Aram, Samar, and a few other lucky members of the night crew that had survived the invasion. He thrashed for a moment before he heard the sound of a gun being cocked and felt the pressure on the back of his head. Jacob stilled, lying against the floor with his hands tied behind his back at a painful angle, and heard the man that was standing next to Liz laughed.

"Your boy's got some spirit, Rostova," he chuckled. "Must be fun."

"You know who I am, Braxton. You know you're not getting anything from me. Beat on me all night, but you'll kill me and have nothing to show for it." She offered him a lazy sort of smirk. "Get it over with, would you?"

"I do know who you are," he answered. "I don't expect you'll bend and break for the feds. But how much you wanna bet he will?"

"If I don't know anything what the hell makes you think he does?"

"It's amazing how many rumours fly with someone like you. I doubt they're all true, but the fact that you're here means the one about falling in love with a fed is. I bet you tell the mister everything, don't you?"

One of his captors hauled Jacob to his feet so that he had a better view of things. He kept his expression even as Braxton crossed the space between them. "Where's the file?"

"What file?"

"The blackmail file of Reddington's your wife has."

"You know, buddy, here's the thing. My wife is a trained agent. There's a hell of a lot she doesn't tell me, and-"

Braxton motioned and a shot rang out, one of his thugs putting a bullet in the head of a woman Jacob was pretty sure was an analyst. He didn't twitch, even as Cooper and Aram made small sounds of protest from their spot. "I can't tell you what I don't know. Why don't you ask Reddington?"

"I asked you."

"Guess you picked the wrong people to interrogate then."

Braxton glanced to where Liz was, her hands wrapped around the chains that were biting into her wrists, her scowl dangerous. He needed her alive, that much Jacob was sure if. The rest of them were expendable, but Braxton's test had failed. He had likely expected a reaction at the quick trigger finger and had received none from either of them.

"The ginger," one of the men that had found them said. "They were together when we came across them. He's been protecting him."

Liz caught Jacob's gaze briefly, worry flashing through her eyes, but he wasn't sure if it was for Ressler or the idea that Jacob might say something because of him.

They hauled Ressler to his feet only to toss him back to the floor. The injured agent was only halfway conscious, and Braxton took hold of him, hand clamping down on his injured shoulder. Ressler jerked fully back to consciousness with a yelp and Jacob fought the hands on him. "Fine. Okay," he snapped. Liz turned a horrified look on him and he shook his head. "The damn thing isn't worth Ress' life." He turned back to Braxton. "Redford Bank. Box 3929. It's there."

Braxton nodded and took a step closer. "I hope you know that if you're lying, I'm going to put a bullet in you so that you can watch your buddy die as you bleed out. Your wife knows where it is, and all I need is one of you."

"Box 3929," Jacob repeated.

"Get it," Braxton barked. "Cuff him and keep an eye on both of them."

They hauled Jacob over to the others, but away from Liz. Her expression was frustrated, but it was an act. He knew it was. She was doing her best to back him in this.

Jacob took a hard seat and was cuffed to one of the tables. Ressler was all but tossed down beside him, his expression strained as he held his arm close in. "Jake-"

"Shut up. All I did was buy us time."

* * *

Reddington trusted a select number of people in crisis situations, and this was most certainly one. Baz's team was scattered and they were on more of a time crunch than usual, so Red settled for the man himself, a couple of his own men, Dembe, and he would go in with them.

"The lockdown is in effect, but no distress signal has been sent," Kate Kaplan said as they bent over the layout of the Post Office. "We've had eyes on all possible exits for the facility and only one small team has exited. None of them were faces we know as part of the task force."

"When did they leave?"

"About twenty minutes ago."

"But there's no way to reach the inside is there?" Reddington mused.

Kate's brows drew together in a worried manner. "There's no guarantee she's alive, Raymond."

"It doesn't matter. I'm going in."

She nodded and Baz reached forward to point as he spoke. "Our most likely entry points, with the lockdown, are here and here, but both will take time. There's a good chance we'll be spotted before we ever breach the facility."

"I have a better idea. Do we have a tail on the ones that left?"

"Of course," Kate answered a little indignantly.

"Pick one up. They'll get us into the Post Office the way they came out." He bent down to pick up the shotgun leaned against the table. "Don't bother with the others. We don't need them. If they get in the way put a bullet in their heads and be done with it."

Baz nodded and Reddington watched he and Dembe move out. Kate reached a hand out for him. "I'm only going to say this once, dearie, but you'll do her no good dead."

"I'm aware," he answered tightly, "but I won't lose her again, Kate."

* * *

Jacob was playing them. She could tell that much, because as far as she knew her husband didn't have a secret bank box hidden away, much less had the blackmail file stored there. He was buying time and trying to keep them alive while doing it. Braxton was certain Liz knew where it was, so as long as he didn't know, she was the only one really safe. Until then, anyone else was fair game.

Liz tried to look around as best as she could in her awkward position. Ressler looked miserable, his shirt covered in blood and his face pale as he leaned against Jacob, only about halfway conscious. Even if Jacob broke free of his bonds - Liz certainly didn't have that option with the way her hands were tied above her head for the whole room to see - he wouldn't get two steps before getting himself or someone else killed, and Liz knew he wouldn't risk his partner like that. In a selfish way, she hoped he wouldn't risk her exposed as she was, even if Braxton needed her alive.

Liz's gaze darted over as one of Braxton's men came in and spoke quietly in his ear. Whatever was said didn't appear to be good.

Braxton snorted and motioned to Liz. "Get her down. Kill the others."

The first gunshot went off and another agent fell dead. There was no way they could have broken into the bank and found it empty yet. There hadn't been time. "You're going to have what you want," she hissed. "Jacob told you where to find the damn thing. Go to the bank. Get it and leave us alone!"

"There's not time sir," one of the men said. "Reddington's already inside."

Liz froze, blinking hard. Reddington had come to help them? How had he even known? One of Braxton's goons started to lower her down, but she kicked out, catching him in the gut and sending him stumbling back.

"Hey!" Braxton yelled.

"Hey," she growled back. "Leave them alone. You don't touch one hair on any of the ones left and I'll go quietly with you. You hurt any one of them and I'll fight you do hard you'll kill me before you _ever_ get what you want."

Braxton watched her for a second, as if he was sizing her up. "Fine."

"Liz!" Jacob yelled from where he was still cuffed to his place.

She didn't have a chance to say anything as they dragged her out the door and down the hall roughly. She could hear the sound of gunshots and a fight following them, but Braxton had ahold of her shoulder. "You fight me and our deal is off. Your husband's life ends with one radio call, you got it?"

"I got it," she growled.

"Maybe I underestimated your attachment to him, Rostova. I should have used him."

"I'm going to kill you either way," she told him simply. "All that would have done was made it more painful."

"Your husband lied to me about the file, didn't he?"

"I wouldn't know."

Braxton snorted. "I have ways of getting the information from you," he assured her and shoved her forward.

They rounded the corner and she spotted an ambulance waiting there. The doors opened as they moved closer and a paramedic - she assumed he was, anyway - tossed Braxton a jacket with a patch just like his own sewed in. There was another woman waiting inside. "You can get the chip out?"

Liz tensed a little. The tracking chip that had been part of her deal. They had dug Reddington's from his neck at some point, so she understood, and now they were going to do the same to her.

The lady paramedic nodded nervously and Braxton grinned. "Good. Time to put some distance between us."

* * *

Jacob fought hard against his restraints, working his wrists against them. He had never mastered the art of pulling his thumb from its socket to slip them, but he was a damn good lock pick. He, like the others, were fastened to the mesh fencing behind the desks that separated the pull pen from a hallway, and he pulled hard on it. If he could pull it loose, he could then use the wiring to cut the holdings.

The sound of footsteps could be heard on the catwalk above and Jacob cringed, wondering if Braxton's boys had come back to finish the job.

"Where is Elizabeth?"

Reddington's voice was, somehow, at least a bit of a relief. "He took her."

"If we can get the systems back up we can track her chip," Aram offered.

Reddington and Dembe moved into their line of view and Dembe knelt with wire cutters that snapped the restraints. "Do it," Reddington snapped.

Jacob was on his feet as soon as he was free. "Call me as soon as it's up."

"Halfway there now that they're not jamming the signals," Aram answered, looking over at Ressler. "I hit the alert as well. An ambulance is in its way."

"Ress…"

"Go, you idiot. Go save your wife," Ressler grumbled.

Jacob nodded and started towards the stairs. Reddington was on his heels as he dropped off to pick up his sidearm from where they'd dropped it. "Whatever you have to drive, I guarantee I'm a faster driver."

"Dembe will follow for backup."

The fact that Red didn't argue was both a relief and a surprise, but not one that he was going to linger on. "What's going on? This guy knows about the file."

"I have told you time and again that the Cabal is dangerous, Agent Phelps. They want the Fulcrum. They'll stop at nothing to get it. This isn't your car."

Jacob paused half a beat as his brain processed the sentence that didn't seem to fit. "It's the bureau's. You can get in or I can go save Liz by myself. Your call."

Reddington offered the Mustang a brief look of distrust before climbing into the passenger's seat. Jacob revved the engine and the tires spun as he left the garage, his phone connecting with the system and ringing through with Aram's name attached to it. "Where are we going, Aram?"

"I've sent the coordinates through. You should be able to track them as we do."

"Sounds good. Red's on speaker."

"You take the Mustang?" Ressler's tired voice sounded over the phone.

"We need fast."

"Please don't crash and kill yourself."

Jacob snorted as he glanced down to the gps tracking the chip that should lead them to Liz.

"Dembe, have you found her?" Reddington asked as he pulled his burner phone to his ear and Jacob took a sharp left, following the signal. "Stay on her. I'll let Agent Phelps know."

"You'll let me know what?"

"You're going the wrong direction."

"This is where-"

"They've likely removed it. Take a right up here and get going in the other direction."

Jacob growled irritably, but didn't argue. If they knew where to look and didn't care about hurting her, it'd be easy enough to dig that chip out and toss it, sending them on a wild goose chase and losing her in the process.

"You and Elizabeth have the file."

"Liz already told you-"

"This isn't a game, Agent Phelps. The fact that neither of you are willing to trust me with this is part of what has put Elizabeth in danger in the first place. Right up here."

Jacob realized he was getting the lecture while Red was still taking instructions from Dembe. He took a hard right, causing the tires to squeal. "And what's the other thing, Red? Handing a dangerous blackmail file to a four-year-old?"

From his peripheral vision Jacob saw Reddington frown. "Left and then a right two streets up. They were desperate times, Jacob. You…weren't there. You couldn't possibly imagine the choices at hand."

"Ever thought maybe we don't trust you because you withhold information? A lot of it, by the way."

"Let's focus on saving her now. We'll discuss What happened after."

"I'm not going to let you turn her into you," Jacob said dangerously.

Reddington gave a sad sort of smile, but refused to answer. Instead he gave another direction and Jacob drove.

* * *

Her shoulder was burning from where the medic had dug the chip out, but she knew she had to focus on it. A close compartment like this was her best chance of surviving. She was unarmed, and Braxton thought that gave him the advantage, but she had always excelled in using her surroundings.

Liz drew a steadying breath and closed her eyes, mentally counting off. Two paramedics, Braxton, and the driver. This was a walk in the park. She'd been trained for this sort of thing.

The lady paramedic leaned in to stick her with a needle and Liz jerked up, her head colliding with the other woman's and knocked her back. She swung a leg around, slamming into Braxton and knocking him back hard. She ducked under the other paramedic, slipped around him, and used the momentum to slam him hard into the wall of the ambulance. She reached out on instinct, grabbing for the gun in Braxton's hand and it went off. Immediately the ambulance swerved, throwing them both hard. The stretcher slammed into them and she kicked out at it as hard as possible, popping the door open just right.

Braxton grabbed hold of her as she made a dash for the door, but Liz swung around, using the out of control ambulance's movements and the large man's own weight against him. They both went tumbling out, hitting the pavement and rolling.

Liz was on her feet in an instant, her fist slamming into his jaw hard and she shook out the ache it left before dodging a clumsy attempt to reciprocate. It had been a while since she had gone all out at someone, and this guy deserved everything she had and then some. He had threatened her husband, her new team, and… her friends. Yes, on some level, they were. Enough that the threats levelled at them were helping her to send her over the boiling point as she waylaid on the man.

"Elizabeth!"

Her name stopped her and she took a hesitant step back to see Braxton all but twitching on the street. After a beat and a careful breath she turned to see Reddington coming towards her, Jacob just behind him. Just beyond them stood Dembe next to a second vehicle.

Jacob moved passed Red and suddenly Liz was in his arms. She felt the rage die down as she returned the embrace, burying her face in the crook of his shoulder and holding tight. "Damn," he managed when they parted and he got a better look at Braxton. "Remind me not to piss you off."

"I went easy on you that time," she tried for a tease. She almost regretted it, but he cracked a smile and pressed a kiss to her forehead before releasing her.

She turned, still coming down from the rush, and found Reddington staring at her, his discomfort barely covered. Why he was the one that looked uncomfortable with her display when her husband had taken it in stride, she couldn't be certain. "I didn't tell him that you don't have your precious blackmail file. I'd guess that's what you're worried about."

"Hardly," Reddington managed. "I…" His expression was so strained, so pained, and she wasn't quite sure why. "Lizzie, I am so sorry to have brought this down on you."

"He's alive," Jacob said from behind. "How are you? Now that the adrenaline is wearing off and you might actually be able to tell."

"I'm okay. I'm… alright." She leaned in as he put his arms around her again, pulling her close and kissing her head.

"We came to rescue you," he offered with a small chuckle.

"You'll have to be faster next time," Liz managed. "How's Don?"

"They were calling an ambulance when I left. I got him patched up pretty well before they found us. It got the bleeding slowed at least. He'll be fine."

"Audrey's going to kill him."

Her husband snorted. "They'll have to push the wedding back a couple weeks. She was wanting it Saturday."

"You're optimistic."

"That she'll push it back or that he'll be there?"

Liz just smiled at him and pecked him on the cheek. He took hold of her hand, inspecting the damage done to her wrists from the chains and he ran a thumb along her tender jawline. "I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault. I'm a big girl."

"Doesn't mean I don't _want_ to protect you," he whispered.

"Well, as long as I can protect you too," she answered and he gave her that quirked smile of his she lived.

"Deal."

Liz drew in a deep breath and glanced over to Reddington and Dembe who were speaking quietly. "We need to tell him."

"Liz, this-"

"I can't explain it, babe. He wasn't here for the file. That's what I thought when I saw him. That… That he was here to make sure I didn't spill his secrets, but you didn't see his face when he spoke to me."

"People fake emotions, Liz. I don't have to tell you that."

"No, but I know when they do, and that was real. We either need to start trusting him or cut ties. Either way, I want to get rid of this thing. He knows what it is and we don't. It's… We're playing with dangers we don't understand."

Her husband nodded slowly. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah. I trust you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'm choosing to. I love you, Lizzie."

A warmth rushed through her and she had her arms around his neck suddenly. He chuckled softly and returned the embrace. "I love you too."

"But he has to be honest with us," Jacob murmured seriously and she nodded.

"That's part of the deal."

She looked over to Red and swallowed hard. Once again, things were about to shift. It was strange, but for some reason, it felt right. She wasn't sure if starting to trust Reddington was a good idea or she just wanted it to be, but if she was right and he really was in this for more than just the file, she needed to learn to trust him. This was just the first step.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Is anyone else really excited for the Gina episode this Thursday? Because I know I am :D

Next time - Jacob throws Ressler a surprise bachelor party and the wedding gives everyone a few minutes to breathe.


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter Thirty-Seven**

 

"Honey, have you seen my earrings I'm supposed to be wearing tomorrow?" Audrey called from their room.

Ressler glanced up from where he was sitting on the couch, book balanced very carefully on his knee with his left hand holding it steady so he could turn the pages with his right, injured arm out of the sling, but still stiff and achy. After one week of medical leave and two and a half of desk duty - or easy vacation time, as Jacob teased - he had gotten movement back, but still preferred not to push his luck. "I think I saw them in the bathroom," he called back, wondering if he was going to be expected to join in on the search.

"Found them," Audrey said as she stuck her head around the corner. She was determined that the night before their wedding she was going to her parents' place.

"You sure that you don't want to just stay here tonight? I mean, all your stuff is here-"

"So's yours," his fiancé argued.

"Yeah, because it's going to take me nearly as long to get ready tomorrow," he teased, finally putting the book down and standing.

"You already put off our wedding. Are you really going to argue with me?"

It took him half a moment to decide if that was mischief or irritation flashing through her eyes. Finally he settled on the former and cracked a grin of his own, crossing the space between them and pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Next time I'll tell the lunatic shooting at me that my wife would disapprove."

"Wife. I like the sound of that," Audrey answered and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "And yes. Your wife always disapproves lunatics shooting at you. I have to go to my parents' house anyway. The dress is there. It's bad luck for you to see it and we need all the good luck we can get."

He rolled his eyes a little. "I could go stay with Jake or something. I feel like I'm putting you out."

"Nope." She kissed him again. "I'll see you tomorrow. Don't be late."

"Promise."

"And don't go too wild tonight."

He quirked an eyebrow. "Yeah, my book and my bummed shoulder are just going to get into all sorts of trouble."

The woman he loved smiled brightly at him as she picked up her bag and gave him a lingering look before she walked out the door. He closed it behind her and leaned his good shoulder against the wall. He was marrying Audrey that next day. Even with all of the chaos that their lives had been smothered in lately, he couldn't have been happier.

A knock startled him before he even had a chance to get back to the couch and he pulled the door back open, thinking that maybe she had forgotten something. Instead, his best friend stood on his doorstep, a grin splitting his face ear to ear. "Navabi and I have a bet going on if I'm going to have to use the duct tape I have have down in the jeep."

Ressler stared at him. "Duct tape?" he repeated, more than a little worried.

"Well, it wouldn't be a kidnapping without it."

"You know that thing when you speak in half sentences? You're doing it again."

"We're kidnapping you. It's the night before your wedding, you haven't had a bachelor party, and before you argue, I checked with Audrey before we set everything up and I know you're off your pain meds. I promise not to get you so drunk you'll be hungover for the wedding. Come on."

"We?" Ressler repeated a little nervously. He wasn't sure he wanted to know who we were.

"The team. As your best man it is my job to take you out for a night on the town."

"I'm not going to be able to talk you out of this, am I?"

"Nope."

Ressler groaned. "Let me get my wallet." He turned grabbing it off of the table and his keys from right next to it. He followed his friend down to the jeep that he and Liz owned and begrudgingly slid into the passenger's seat. "I swear if you kill me I'm going to haunt you until the day you die."

"Which would be as soon as Audrey found me," Jacob acknowledged. "She's pretty damned determined to marry you this time."

A goofy sort of smile crossed his face. "Yeah."

Jacob chattered aimlessly as they drove and Ressler realized they were certainly further than walking distance. If he wanted to duck out before the others he would have to get a cab to go home. Finally he stopped paying attention and listened to his friend prattle on as they drove.

"You and Liz hand over that blackmail file yet?"

"Not yet. We've been going back and forth with him about it though. It's… complicated and I'd kind of like to know more about it before just handing it over, you know?" He made a face. "Hey, let's not ruin you bachelor party with Reddington talk, huh?"

Well, at least that was one person he could knock off his list. He hadn't thought Reddington was the type to show up to a man's bachelor party, especially his of all people, but he had no idea what sort of relationship the Phelps' were cultivating with him, which was odd within itself. He used to be fairly aware of what was happening in Jacob and Liz's tiny circle because it was so… normal. Once it had been, anyway. Now they seemed to have all the secrets in the world and Ressler wasn't sure if that was just the vibe they gave off together or if it was really the case. Either way, he thought that it might be nice for things to go back to the way that they had been, even if it was just for a few hours. "So who all is coming?"

"Liz and Samar set up the venue. Meera said she had something to do tonight, but she might drop by for a minute or two. Cooper too. Aram'll be there."

Ressler quirked an eyebrow. "Damn."

"Well, it's not every day one of our own gets married."

"You did."

"I managed to fit mine in between task forces," Jacob answered with a grin and they turned into a parking lot.

"I don't know this place."

"Liz and Samar picked it out. If you don't like it, blame them and not me."

Ressler snorted as they pulled into a parking spot and Jacob killed the engine. He turned to him, his expression serious. "Congrats, buddy. Seriously. You deserve everything you're about to have." He stopped, blinking as if he were thinking the words over. "I mean the wedding and happy life going forward. Maybe not tonight. I really don't know what all is planned. This isn't exactly a normal bachelor's party."

"When has our team been normal?" Ressler laughed and stepped out of the vehicle. "And hey. Congrats to you too. You got me here without landing us in the hospital."

"That was one time, man."

"One time that you don't remember because of a concussion."

Jacob rolled his eyes dramatically and Ressler shot him a grin. He wouldn't have given up the team they had for the world. Maybe not even Liz, but that was solely for his partner's sake. That was what he was telling himself anyway. He wasn't quite ready to trust her like Jacob was, but he had to admit that he was getting closer. Slowly but surely she was earning his respect back.

"Surprise!"

Ressler laughed at the absurdity of it, and then gave them an honest laugh that followed when he spotted faces he didn't expect. Aaron Bidwell met him halfway inside, drink raised. "Don, happy bachelor party."

"Is that a day now?" Ressler asked with a laugh.

"When you marry my sister it is."

Past him was Samar, Aram and Liz, and with them sat Harold Cooper and a woman that must have been Cooper's wife. Ressler relaxed into a steady smile and he felt Jacob's hand clamp down on his uninjured shoulder. "Congrats."

"Thanks. I'm lucky."

"The key is to remember that. Every day," his best friend told him and moved over to his wife who was beaming at him. Her bruises had faded and Jacob and she seemed happy. It was time to accept that she was a part of their team and that she... Well, if he were honest, that she had been loyal to them. She could have bargained just for Jacob's life with Braxton, but she had included all of them. There was something to be said about that.

Ressler had to dodge some of the well-meaning pats on the back to keep his busted shoulder out of reach, but overall he was overwhelmed by the people willing to spend their evenings wishing him well on his wedding. He met Charlene Cooper, Harold Cooper's wife, and chatted for a while with his future brother-in-law, and then on to Samar for a moment. It took a while before Liz made her way around and found him without anyone to talk to, but slowly she worked her way in. "Hey," she greeted, her tone acknowledging how awkward it was.

He pulled in a deep breath. "Hey."

Liz forced a smile, leaning against the table. "Listen, I know you and I haven't… we don't see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. I get that, but I just wanted to, sincerely, wish you and Audrey all the best. She's smart and brave in so many ways that you have to be to marry an agent. You guys are going to do great, and you…. you're going to make a great dad."

There was a beat of silence in which he wasn't sure of what to say, but then he forced some of his natural guards down and a smile was what was left. "Thanks, Liz. Really."

She gave him a smile, something a little sad and Ressler found himself wondering how much of the canceled adoption was actually her decision.

"To the groom," Jacob called out, raising his glass hand shoving Ressler's own into his good hand.

Ressler couldn't help but smile as the other's echoed and they toasted him. He grinned and chatted, all as he was supposed to and he felt relaxed for the first time in ages outside of his own home with Audrey. The stress of the office wasn't hanging over the team and the issues that they had faced didn't seem to linger. For one evening, they were solid and unified, and it was something he wouldn't give up.

Sometime, long after he'd lost track of the hour, he saw a figure approaching. It was on the outskirts and from outside of the patio area in which they were gathered, but he came closer and somehow he already had a drink in hand, as if he were in control of every step he took. Raymond Reddington, the man he had hunted down for years, offered him what Ressler was fairly certain was a real smile, and lifted his glass. "I'm sorry I'm late, Donald, but I wouldn't miss it. I wanted to offer my congratulations."

Ressler clinked his glass with Red's and offered him a half smile. "You always have to have something to do with every aspect of my life, don't you?"

"Well, I think I shall leave the wedding day well enough alone." Reddington answered with a quirked eyebrow.

"Fair enough," Ressler chuckled. He looked out on the collection of people that had made it. Most of his team was there. His best friend, the others, and even the man he'd tried to apprehend. It was funny the way that life worked out, but somehow it did, and as he looked out on it, Donald Ressler couldn't help but feel a contentment with it. A couple of years before, he never would have imagined it, but there it stood, staring him square in the face, and he found himself with a deeper understanding of what he had. Things were in turmoil and they would always be a little crazy, but Ressler had somehow managed to land himself with a team that trusted him and that he trusted in return. He'd never regret that, no matter what happened. In that moment, as he was surrounded by friends and future-family, Donald Ressler counted his blessings.

* * *

Just like he had promised, Jacob watched out for Ressler that night. They were both less than fully coherent by the time the cab dropped them off at Ressler's place, but Jacob stayed to make sure alarms were set and everything was taken care of. By the time he had made it home himself it was nearly four in the morning. Liz had been asleep, barely stirring as he had climbed into bed with her and burrowed down.

The phone woke him up the next morning. It was buzzing like it would never stop. Jacob groaned loudly, burying himself deeper under the covers. It did finally stop, but started up again almost immediately and he finally grabbed it. "What?" he demanded.

" _Don brought donuts_ ," Liz said cheerfully from the other end.

Jacob blinked hard. "And you couldn't come upstairs to tell me that?"

The call ended in his ear and Jacob considered turning over and going back to sleep. The only reason Ressler was awake at that hour after the night before was because the man was incapable of sleeping in. He was certain of it.

Slowly and with a great deal of protest he pulled himself from the bed and trudged down the stairs. Liz was sitting at the kitchen table with his partner and it took him a moment to remember that that was odd. "You guys decide to play nice?"

His wife rolled her eyes. "Be nice. It's his wedding day."

Jacob snorted and started towards the coffee pot. "Let me wake up a little before you ask me to be nice, would you?"

He could almost hear Ressler rolling his eyes. "You've been married to him long enough to know he's impossible until he has coffee."

Liz laughed and Jacob sighed as he shuffled over with his mug and took a heavy seat, reaching for a donut. "I'm sorry if I was up late making sure Ress made it home so he would make it to the wedding today."

"Wouldn't have been a problem if you hadn't abducted me."

"That was just payback for _my_ bachelors party."

Ressler cringed. "Okay, so you may have been nicer."

"Yeah, you're not hungover this morning, are you? See? I'm a damn good friend."

"Hey, I brought you donuts."

"Back up. You were _hungover_ the day of our wedding?" Liz demanded

"He was fine by the wedding," Ressler argued. "Just…. kind of sick all that morning." Liz shot a glare at him and Ressler gave her a disbelieving look in return. "You're some sort of spy, right? How did you miss that?"

"I'm a good actor?" Jacob offered.

Liz rolled her eyes. "And I was a little preoccupied with my wedding day." She leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "More proof it was real."

"Missing that your fiancé was hungover was proof?" Ressler asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"Pretty sure I didn't question if your excitement over our wedding was ever fake," Jacob chuckled. "Even you're not that good."

Liz took a seat when them. "Audrey pretty excited?"

"Yeah. She didn't really want to push it back, but it gave her time to nitpick."

"Having you high on painkillers would have made things more interesting," Jacob said with a grin.

"You're really not helpful sometimes," his partner answered and popped a donut hole in his mouth.

Jacob's smile didn't fade. It was nice. Things were changing, but for the better. Two of the people closest to him finally seemed to be hedging back to normal and things were finally starting to feel more relaxed.

"See you two at the wedding," Ressler said as he stood, his movements still a little careful with his healing shoulder. "And, Jake-"

"If you're going to tell me not to give you hell at the reception you should have picked someone else as your best man."

His partner rolled his eyes. "That's what you're saving your revenge for, huh?"

Jacob flashed him a grin and leaned back in his chair. "You should have gotten married before me,"

"Trust me, I never thought that you getting married first was going to be an issue," Ressler answered with smirk.

"Thanks, jerk. You still had zero foresight when you gave the toast at our wedding. That's totally on you."

Ressler shook his head, a fond sort of smile tilting his lips. "Try not to have any disasters make you late, huh?"

"I'll keep him out of trouble," Liz promised and Ressler snorted as he walked out.

Jacob looked over at his wife and smirked. "I don't think he believed you."

Liz rolled her eyes and reached her foot out to tilt his chair, balanced on two legs, just a little off kilter. He gave a half yelp before she reached out and caught his wrist, adding enough weight to pull him forward rather than back and she flashed him a grin. "And you?"

He grinned cheekily at her. "I'm fully capable of getting into trouble all in my own."

She echoed his smile and stood, leaning down to press a kiss to his lips. Before she could pull away Jacob caught her, half standing and half pulling her into another kiss. He felt her arms wrap around his neck and her smile was real when they finally broke. "So," he said, his voice a little raw, "we've got some time before you have to start getting ready, right?"

"I think so," she answered a little breathlessly.

No, Jacob decided, things weren't the same, but they were better than they had been. Bit by bit they were putting their lives back together, and as long as that was the direction they were moving, that seemed right.

"Hey?" Liz's voice broke him out of his thoughts and he saw her watching him. "You coming?"

He grinned and followed her up the stairs.

* * *

The wedding was small, but it fit. Liz didn't know all of the details of the story, but she knew Ressler's parents had died and Audrey's family was a little overbearing. It went off without a hitch, surprisingly enough, and Audrey looked like the happiest woman alive.

"It pays to have the best man's mom as your caterer."

Liz turned, finding the new bride standing behind her with a small smile. She hadn't seen her since everything had happened, but as far as she knew Ressler had told her everything. She had been surprised, to say the least, when she had received an invite to the wedding. Happily so. She offered a smile. "Kelly wouldn't have taken no for an answer."

"She's a doll," Audrey answered, her smile. "How have you been?"

"Adjusting. It's been… interesting."

"Jake loves you. I'm sure you'll both be fine."

Liz felt a real smile tug her lips. "I know we will be," she answered softly before her gaze flickered to the dress. "And you. You look gorgeous. And Jacob said you and Don are expecting? You can hardly tell."

"I pegged you for a better liar than that," Audrey laughed, "but thank you. I know things have been… difficult lately, but I hope you and I can still talk. I don't know everything - and honestly I may even prefer not to - but you seem to really love Jake and I know that Don is starting to trust you."

"He's good at hiding that."

"He is. He's careful."

"I don't know _anyone_ like that," Liz laughed, gaze drifting to Jacob.

"How did they ever manage to become friends?"

"A question I ask all the time."

Audrey flashed her a smile. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go steal my husband for a dance." She paused, the smile only brightening and took off across the room.

Liz found herself smiling as well. It was strange. She had spent so long focused on survival, and for her that meant that others were irrelevant. She couldn't worry about them. It would have ended up costing her her life. Here, though, as she scanned the crowd and saw Audrey pulling her new husband to the dance floor, Aram flirting awkwardly with Samar who was smiling quietly at him, Meera dancing with a man Liz didn't recognize, and the Coopers chatting with Jacob's parents, Jacob having migrated over when Ressler was snagged by Audrey, she felt at home for the first time in far too long. This, as they were building it, was what she had thought was too far out of reach to ever hope for.

"Quite a turnout."

Liz turned sharply, finding a man she was sure wasn't invited smiling smugly at her. "Assistant Attorney General-"

"Didn't you hear, Mrs Phelps? I was sworn in just a few days ago. I'm the AG now." Tom Connolly stopped, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "Mrs Phelps, or do you prefer Ms Rostova?"

The former operative stiffened. "What do you want, Connolly?"

"A quick conversation with you, nothing too bad." He motioned to the hallway outside of the room everyone had gathered in and Liz glanced behind her, seeing Jacob still involved in the conversation. She followed, glaring as they slipped out of sight into the stairwell just across the hall. When Connolly turned back to face her, all pretense of kindness was gone. "I have no question that you know exactly who I am and who I work for."

"The US government?" Liz asked cheekily. This wasn't good.

"Don't be coy. You're Reddington's little pet. Katarina Rostova's daughter. I imagine you know _quite_ a bit more than you'd admit to, just like your mother."

"Get to your point," Liz growled lowly.

"I want you to call off Reddington. He's fixated on us and we're done playing his game."

"And if I don't?"

Connolly's smile was unnerving. "It's such a lovely group you associate with these days. They all have a little something of a skeleton in their closets, and if they don't, evidence can always be manufactured. Shouldn't be too hard for your husband though. I hear he has a rather colourful past."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Really? I was willing to blackmail a man I've known for years by making him think he has a terminal illness. Do you think I would give any pause to dragging your husband's name through the mud before having him brought to trial to face what he's run from all his life? How do you expect that would end, Ms Rostova? Life in prison or the death penalty? Amazing what comes out when people start digging."

"He hasn't-"

"It doesn't matter."

It didn't. She knew that. Liz knew she should turn right then and go tell him, but then Connolly would get away and Jacob and his team - _their_ team - would be in danger. She looked to the door, indecision being overridden by instinct when she heard him snort a laugh at what he must have thought was catching her between a rock and a hard place. "So do we have an understanding?" he asked, but didn't quite get the last word out before she turned around and threw the punch. It knocked him back and she slipped around, the heels and dress making it difficult but not impossible. Tom Connolly reared back. He wasn't a fighter and he had no idea how to dodge or block the blows that she was trained to throw. She watched with a blank expression as he tumbled backwards down the stairs, landing at the bottom with a crack and he didn't move.

* * *

The smile Audrey was wearing somehow made the day better than before. Ressler hadn't been sure it could get any better. The dance finished up, and even though his shoulder was aching, he found he couldn't stop smiling.

"Thank you," Audrey said as she tipped up and pressed a kiss to his lips. Her fingers lingered very lightly against his healing shoulder. "How's it feeling?"

"Better." He caught movement out of the corner of his eye and glanced over, blinking hard to make sure he was seeing it correctly. Tom Connolly was holding the door to the hall open and Liz Phelps was joining him in the hallway.

"Everything okay?" his wife asked curiously.

"Yeah, I'm sure it is."

She followed his gaze, but they were already gone. "Who was it?"

"Liz and… Someone that shouldn't be here." Audrey frowned and he offered a smile. "It's fine, sweetheart. I'm sure it's fine."

"Go check. You won't be able to stop thinking about it until you do."

He paused for half a beat and then pressed a kiss to her forehead. She knew him too well. "Love you."

"I love you too."

Ressler turned towards the exit, the rest of the room happily oblivious. There was no good reason that Connolly would have shown to his wedding. No one trusted him, not even Cooper it would seem these days, and the fact that Liz had followed him out made him uneasy.

It could be nothing, though. He hoped it was nothing.

The groom pushed open the door and found the hallway outside empty. He paused, looking both directions and found nothing. He was about ready to go in and ask Jacob if he knew what was going on when the sound of a struggle drew his attention to the stairwell. Ressler moved forward, hand on the door when he heard the sound of a loud crash on the other side and he wished that he had his gun as he pushed it open.

Elizabeth Phelps stood on the landing just inside, her hair a little disheveled and her expression turning carefully blank. "Don," she breathed.

His gaze shifted to the stairs where the newly sworn in Attorney General lay at the bottom, bent in an awkward direction. "What have you done?" he managed. He had come up with all the ways he thought her attendance at his wedding could end badly, but this hadn't even made the more improbable scenarios.

Liz gaze hardened. "We knew he was Cabal. He threatened our whole team."

Ressler started down the stairs, feeling sick. "So you killed him? At my _wedding_?"

"Didn't you hear me? He threatened _everyone_. What did you expect me to do?"

"You should have come to us!" Ressler hissed. He knelt down, fingers checking for a pulse. If he were alive, maybe, just maybe, they could help her. He frowned and looked up to her. "He's dead."

"Are you going to arrest me?" she asked and he hesitated, his gaze locked with his best friend's wife's. She had killed the Attorney General. Even if there had been a reason, it was still murder. Cold blooded murder.

Ressler remained frozen where he was as Liz made her way down the stairs, her expression tight. "Tell Jacob I'm so sorry," she whispered and moved past him.

He stood next to the body of a man that had been trying to dismantle them piece by piece and listened to the sound of Liz's heels as she ran.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: So, it sounds like there was quite a bit of excitement for the bachelor party/wedding, so I hope it lived up to it! Things are about to go crazy again from here. These poor guys just can't catch a break.

So, anyone else think that Gina's about to betray Jacob 100% in the next episode? I've talked with a few people about it, and honestly, I'd be okay with him getting hurt as long as it ends with Liz realizing that she's been pretty terrible about the whole giving their baby up without his consent and such. They seem to have so many nods to S1 lately, I need one to the pilot where all she could  think of what how scared she was for her husband when he was hurt. Red tried to get her to focus on the case and all she could think of was Tom and the fact that he'd nearly died in their dining room. _That_ 's what I need from this Thursday's episode.

Next time - Liz goes on the run and the Director tries to have Jacob's badge taken.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter Thirty-Eight**

Jacob was a people watcher by nature. As a kid he had used it to watch for signals that he needed to make adjustments to the way he approached things and how people wanted him to react. As an adult it made him an expert at reading their suspects. He knew people, he knew what they did, but he just didn't always understand the why behind it.

Dark blue eyes scanned the crowd as his attention drifted from the conversation that he had been listening to. Meera had brought a date that she had only introduced as David, a man that she seemed uninclined to give a great deal of information about. Aram was finally making his clumsy and awkward move - possibly with a little liquid courage - that they had all but started an office bet on. Samar was smiling at him and she reached down and took his hand, both of them moving towards the dance floor.

The door to the hall opened and Ressler strode in, his expression considerably less happy than it should have been. Jacob found him making a beeline over to him and dread started to creep in. "Director Cooper, Jake? A word?"

Jacob glanced back to Cooper who had been standing with his wife and Jacob's parents chatting about….something as Jacob's attention had drifted. Kelly's brows drew together, but she knew better than to ask directly. Instead she turned her attention to Cooper's wife. "Charlene, you were asking about those croquettes?"

Charlene Cooper seemed to catch the hint as Jacob and Harold Cooper followed Ressler off to the side. He was agitated, his gaze constantly shifting towards the younger agent. "What the hell is going on?" Jacob demanded as they stepped to the side.

"AG Connolly is dead."

Both men stared unblinking. "What?" Cooper finally managed.

Jacob didn't like the way he had been brought into this as if he were equal to Cooper in his need to know the information.

"Connolly was just killed. Here."

"By who? Why are you-"

His best friend looked so pained that Jacob knew before the words left his mouth. "Liz. She killed him."

Whatever Cooper followed up with to that, Jacob didn't hear. The words seemed to batter around in his head, the meaning behind them just beyond his grasp and overshadowed by denial. "Ress? Ressler, she wouldn't have," he cut in. "Where is she? There's more to the story than that."

Ressler swallowed hard. "She's gone, Jake."

The argument died in his throat and his friend reached out. "I'm sorry, man."

"There's more to this than we're seeing," Jacob managed. "She knew they're trying to get to her. That's why she ran. We can just… We have to protect her."

"Where?" Cooper asked, pulling his phone out to make the call.

"East stairwell."

Their boss nodded and left the two men alone to talk. Jacob felt himself spiraling. "What happened? Exactly."

Ressler took him through it step by step. The odd way she had followed him out, her claims that Connolly had threatened them all, and finally that he had let her slip past him without so much as an argument. "I shouldn't have let her go. Jake, I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "She's not going to just disappear. She'll contact me."

"She told me to tell you she was sorry. It doesn't sound like she will." Ressler sighed and reached out, hand on his shoulder. "I don't think she's coming back. We're… We're going to have to look for her, but we'll find her before the Cabal. We'll get the story then."

Jacob swallowed hard. "Ress, I'm sorry this-"

Ressler snorted. "It's typical, but we have a job to do."

"This job works its way into every inch of our lives," Jacob murmured.

"Understatement. Hey, listen, I'll-"

"No," Jacob cut him off. "This is your wedding. I'll handle it. Just, give me a second to make a phone call?"

Ressler nodded and Jacob stepped to the side, pulling his cell phone out of his coat pocket. He glanced over briefly before dialing a number. "It's Phelps. Tell him it's about Liz."

He waited until a familiar voice sounded. " _Shouldn't you both be at Donald's wedding about this time_?"

"Liz is in trouble. Connolly was here. I don't know what happened, but she killed him and ran."

There was a beat of silence on the other end of the line. " _Is the FBI looking for her_?"

"Yes."

" _I'll find her_ ," Reddington said, " _but I won't hand her over to the task force again. The Cabal is too deeply entrenched_."

Jacob's gaze shifted over as he heard sirens outside the building. "I know."

" _It's time for you both to start trusting me, Agent Phelps. I know how difficult that is for you, but I am Lizzie's only hope in getting out of this alive. Call me if she reaches out to you_."

"Will do." He ended the call and shoved the phone back in his pocket, pulling in a steadying breath. Ress had disappeared to handle the people that had come for the wedding and Cooper's call had brought FBI and likely others. They would hunt Liz now and she wouldn't even get a chance to explain. He wouldn't let them take her, no matter what. He wasn't going to lose her to them.

* * *

The first place she went was home. Liz had purposefully dismantled her go-bag when everything had come to light. It had been one of her ways to show Jacob that she chose him over everything. Now, though, she was throwing things into a bag and running. It hurt. More than she thought it could.

Elizabeth Phelps pulled her hood up and around her face as she moved down the street, bag held close to her. She needed a plan. A way out of the city. Most of her old contacts wouldn't dare touch her. She had lost her place in McCready's organization when she chose Jacob and now she was entirely on her own.

She had to move fast if she wanted out though. She could catch a bus and head up north. She had a contact in New York City that could get her a new ID. Two new ID's if things worked out the way she hoped. Her contact owed her.

Liz took a seat at a table outside of a little cafe. She had made the call thirty minutes before and the sun was down below the horizon now. She ordered a coffee and waited.

"Looks a lot like the place we met," a voice said from behind her and her husband slipped into the seat next to her. He had obviously made it to the townhouse at some point after she had slipped out because he was dressed down from the suit he'd worn to the wedding and sports a baseball cap to shield some of his features. He wore a smile, but it was all fake. She couldn't see beneath the mask, though, only that it was there, and that made her nervous.

"Jacob, I-"

"You wouldn't have done it without a reason," he said firmly, reaching under the table and taking her hand. "We're going to be okay."

She loosed a breath and squeezed his fingers. "I love you. I'm so sorry, but he was going to hurt everyone. If I didn't handle him there, who knows when it could have been done. Don-"

"Yeah, he has crap timing. Babe, I don't have long. They're already looking for you and I-"

"I have to go, Jacob."

"I know." The words left him a little sadly and she caught his gaze.

"Come with me?"

He swallowed hard and she could tell he was thinking about it. "Lizzie, I want to. I do, but I can protect you better from the inside."

"And you can't leave the people you care about," she added softly. Kelly, Bruce, Ressler, his team… For a man that had been told most of his life he was incapable of real emotional connection, he certainly had managed a few.

He nodded. "We'll fix this."

"I'm really tired of fixing it," Liz whispered. "I just… want to go home. Maybe I should just turn myself in. Maybe-"

"That would be a mistake."

Liz turned, finding Reddington standing over them. She frowned, but Jacob's expression indicated that he had expected the older man. "Red's going to keep you away from them. He's been… He has twenty years of avoiding these people, Liz. I'll clear you. I promise. The whole team will."

"Why would they?"

"Because you've earned it," he said quietly. "Because they trust you. He won't admit it, but that's why Ress let you go. Now we just have to prove it to people who don't know you."

"It's time to go, Elizabeth," Reddington said, and Liz glanced around to where he was looking at a television, her face lighting up the screen.

Jacob cursed lowly. "They weren't supposed to put that out until morning."

"Jacob," she called softly, her voice wavering. "I don't want-"

He leaned across the table and kissed her. "I love you, and I'll do whatever I have to to protect you. Even if that means we have to be apart."

"You could still come." She knew it was selfish, but she couldn't bring herself to care as she stared into his eyes.

"Getting you out will be difficult enough," Reddington said. "Let your husband do this for you, Lizzie. You and I will dismantle the Cabal with the help of that file."

"We don't have a choice," Jacob murmured. "The sooner we take them down, the sooner this is over."

She nodded, biting her bottom lip even as she stood. He followed the motion and pulled her into his arms. "Be safe. I love you."

"You too. These people… They'll try to go after you if they can't get me."

He flashed her a charming smile. "The badge offers some protection at least."

Liz tipped up on her toes and felt his hands in her hair as they kissed. She didn't care about drawing attention. She just needed him to know that he was the most important thing in the world to her. "I love you."

"You too," he breathed. "Go. I'll see you soon."

She nodded, feeling Reddington's hand on her arm. She didn't want to leave, but she had to. She blinked rapidly as they walked to try and clear the tears from her eyes.

"You are doing the right thing, Elizabeth. Jacob knows that. That's why he called me."

"I can't protect him if I'm not with him."

"Your husband is nothing if not adaptable. You need to trust him. And me."

"We're going to take them down?"

"It's the only way."

She nodded and a car pulled up, Dembe in the driver's seat. "Then let's do it."

* * *

Jacob felt like his world was coming unhinged all over again. Things had just started getting back to something like normal after Reddington's appearance in their lives had upended everything so badly. He and Liz had settled out and were finally getting to know each other on a more honest level, the team was accepting her, and they were working out a system that didn't feel like it was dragging them through a living nightmare every day. And then it had hit all over again.

Kelly and Bruce had been mostly accepting of the fact he couldn't tell them a great deal. Liz was in trouble, they were trying to protect her, and his job could potentially put the people he cared for in a lot of danger. They would take Hudson and go for an extended stay with Kelly's brother in New York. It was safer that way, and Jacob knew he could focus on what he needed to if he wasn't worried about them as well. They would be heading out first thing the next morning.

Jacob risked a glance down at his phone as he stepped out of the lift and into the Post Office. Who needed sleep anyway?

"Where the hell have you been?" Ressler demanded as he entered.

His partner shot him a look. "Handling things." He lowered his voice so only Ressler could hear him. "I convinced Kelly and Bruce to take a trip. These guys are willing to go to these lengths, I don't trust them anywhere near my family."

"Did Liz contact you?"

"You don't want to know the answer to that, Ress."

"No, but the higher ups do. They have you set for a polygraph."

"Are you serious?"

"The Director is trying to push you out. Don't give him a reason to. We need you in this. Hell, Liz needs you in here."

"I know."

"Jake…"

"What?"

Ressler pulled in a deep breath. "I don't want to know who you called at the wedding, but I do know they've already pulled your phone records. Be careful, okay?" He paused, glancing down the hall. "They wanted to see you as soon as you got in. Come on."

Jacob followed him back, seeing far more unfamiliar faces than he was comfortable with. The Cabal really was deeply entrenched. He had made the right call, both in sending Liz away and his parents. He was starting to wonder if Audrey should have gone with them. A long as Ressler didn't _look_ like he was rocking the boat, she should be fine, and if he could trust anyone to abide by the rules, it was Donald Ressler. He would be determined that everything could be fine from the inside and swaying him on that would be next to impossible. Jacob knew he needed to be in the inside, but that didn't mean that rules weren't about to be bent to the point of breaking. At least on his end.

Cooper met them at the door. "I'd like to tell you this is routine, Agent Phelps."

"You and I both know that there's more to this than Kotsiopulos will admit."

"I'll do everything in my power to protect this team."

"Me too." He flashed them both a grin. "Wish me luck."

Jacob stepped into the room and moved to the chair waiting for him. Samar Navabi wasn't waiting this time and he knew the man sitting across the table was likely Cabal. He knew that the Director was, and he stood bold as brass behind him.

"Agent Phelps."

"Director."

"Just answer the questions honestly and we'll be out of here in no time."

Jacob let a lazy sort of smile tilt his lips as they connected him to the machine. His gaze drifted over Kotsiopulos, finding the man difficult to get a good read on. He was CIA, so he supposed he shouldn't be surprised.

"Please state your name for the record."

"Jacob Phelps."

"Thank you. Please answer yes or no. You have been with the FBI for ten years now?"

"Just about. Yes."

"You are thirty-five years old?"

"No."

"Thirty-four?"

"Yes."

"You are married to a woman that introduced herself as Elizabeth Scott?"

"Yes."

"Are you aware that her real name is Masha Rostova?"

"Yes."

"Has she been assisting the task force you work on?"

"I'm sorry, but what's your clearance level?"

The man blinked and Jacob quirked a smile. Cooper motioned for him to go ahead from behind the man and Jacob's smile didn't waver. "Yes."

"Have you been in contact with your wife since she left?"

"No," he lied, but the machine gave no alert.

"Have you been in contact with Raymond Reddington?"

"Yes."

"Did you arrange for Masha Rostova's escape?"

"No."

The Director shifted from his place. "Then why contact Reddington?"

Jacob waited for Cooper's okay before he leaned back in his chair. "Reddington knows more about my wife than she does. I thought she might have reached out to him. I wanted to make sure she was safe."

"And had Reddington spoken to her?"

Jacob shrugged. "He wouldn't tell me. Imagine that? He doesn't trust me."

Kotsiopulos gave a thin smile and Jacob's gaze shifted slowly over to the technician at the machine. There was something there, a flicker, and while the machine may not have caught his lies, he thought that the Director may have. There was something there, some small tell that even he wasn't aware of, and it had given him away. He wouldn't leave the facility with his badge and he knew it.

"Walk us through what happened, Agent Phelps. Assistant Director Cooper has only been able to tell us what he has seen for himself and we'll be waiting on the report, but for now let's get a few details clear. Was Donald Ressler the one that let her go?"

"No."

There was a beat of silence and Jacob felt Cooper's gaze on him. "Agent Ressler told your superior-" Kotsiopulos began, but Jacob cut him off.

"Listen, Ress is my partner. We've known each other since Quantico. He's also a rule book toting Boy Scout. Sure, he saw her on the way out, and he's kicking himself for it, but I was the one that found her there and told her to run. I was already back at the party before Ress got there. He probably didn't even see me."

"Why?"

"Why? Seriously? Because she's my wife." Jacob tilted his head to the side, his gaze never leaving the Director's. If he wanted to know how much he knew, he'd be waiting a while.

"You are stating for the record then, Agent Phelps, that you let Masha Rostova walk after knowing that she killed the Attorney General of the United States and that Donald Ressler lied to your superior about it and claimed that he did?"

"No sir. Ressler has a bad habit of blaming himself for things. He was upset that he didn't stop her, but he didn't know he should. He only knew that in hindsight. Like I said." The lies rolled off his tongue as easy as truth and the machine he was hooked up to didn't waver.

"But you let her walk?"

They were going to toss him out anyway, but if he didn't cover for Ressler there would be even fewer people he could trust on the inside. He just hoped that this didn't leave him behind bars. "Yes."

"Why do you believe she murdered him, Agent Phelps?"

"She said he threatened people she cared about. We've already talked to witnesses that saw her leaving with him, Connolly leading the way. He approached her. I believe it was likely either self defense or defense of someone she cares about."

"Why would the AG threaten someone Rostova cares about?"

"Well we didn't exactly have time to sit down and have a chat over coffee. I don't know, but we can find out. Our team can bring her in and get her side of it."

"But you're the one that let her go," the man across from him pointed out, his tone bordering on confused.

"I've had some time to come down off the shock and I get that it was a bad call." He shifted in his chair. "I've brought her in once before. I am fully capable of doing it again."

"We're done here," Kotsiopulos said tightly. "Agent Cooper, a word?"

Cooper nodded.

"Can I take these things off?" Jacob demanded, motioning to the wires.

"Just don't leave the premise, Agent Phelps," Kotsiopulos warned him and the two men walked out.

Jacob started tugging wires loose. This was a mess, but if he set the cards just right, he might have at least mitigated the immediate damage.

* * *

"You can't let them do this," Ressler growled, feeling his control wavering dangerously. "This isn't Jake's fault. _I_ let her go. If anyone should-"

"They don't know you let her go," Jacob said from his place slouched in one of the chairs. His expression was calculating and there was nothing about it that put Ressler's nerves at ease. "And they won't."

Ressler's gaze flickered to Cooper. "Sir, you can't possibly be entertaining this."

"Agent Phelps has already typed up his official report and, technically, you're in leave for your wedding."

"I've been here putting out fires all night!" Ressler argued and he turned to Jacob. "You can't do this. I'm not going to let you take the fall for me. If they catch one wrong recording of what happened-"

"Ress, shut up and think for half a second, okay?" his best friend snapped, straightening in his seat. "They were going to force me out from the moment that I stepped into that room. Lies or truth, they wanted me out. There was no reason for us both to go down. Don't be stupid."

Ressler bristled at the words. "So you're just going to play martyr on this? They'll throw you in jail, Jake!"

"I've come to a compromise with Kotsiopulos," Cooper said. "We're handling this internally. Jacob will be suspended and if the Director wishes to press charges, he'll have to go through Reven Wright. Reven will listen to me on this." His gaze shifted over. "I'll need your badge and firearm, Agent Phelps."

Very slowly Jacob nodded and reached for them. "They're not going to press charges. They'll want me free to see if I'll lead them to Liz."

"Do you know where she is?" Ressler ventured.

"No," Jacob said firmly, "and I'd like to keep it that way. She's… I won't risk her safety with these people. I trust our team, but that's as far as it goes."

"If we find her, we'll have to bring her in," Ressler said carefully. "All I can promise you is that we'll keep her safe, Jake."

"Hopefully by then we'll have all the answers lined up. Does the CIA still have Karakurt?"

"He's being released. They're going to try to pin the bombing on Liz again," Cooper answered with a deep frown.

"Not if we make him confess." Jacob stood, his expression serious. "Keep me in the loop as best as you can."

"And what will you be doing?" their boss asked hesitantly.

Jacob flashed him a grin. "Better you don't know."

"They'll try to drag you down with her, Jacob," Cooper warned, and Ressler knew he was right.

His friend shrugged. "I won't go without a fight. They wanted a war? They'll get one with me."

Cooper sighed. "I'll tell you what I can." He glanced over to the door. "Meera is undercover in the Cabal."

"What?" Ressler demanded.

"She'll provide us what she can. Stay safe, Agent Phelps. We'll have you back on the team as soon as we can."

Jacob cracked a smile and Ressler thought that one might have been real. "Thank you, sir, but if not, it's been… Well it's been an honour working for you."

Cooper took his outstretched hand. "Agent Ressler, if you'll escort him off the premise?"

Ressler nodded, following Jacob out of the office and down the stairs. They were in the lift before he opened his mouth, but Jake spoke first. "I'm sorry, Ress. For everything. I know this isn't fair to-"

"Shut up," Ressler grumbled, echoing his friend's earlier words. "It sucks, but we're in it together."

"Yeah," the younger man mumbled.

"I need to know we are, Jake. You can't go completely rogue on this. I need to know that - even if you go after Karakurt, because I'm not stupid enough to think I can talk you out of that - that you'll let me know." He pulled in a deep breath and the lift slowed to a top. "I need to know you're not going to run."

"I have to protect her, Ress."

"And you can't do that alone."

Jacob shook his head. "The system's screwed. I mean, it's always been a little crazy, but this… I'm going to cross lines you're not comfortable with."

"I know you will. I don't like it, but I'd have to arrest you to stop you. It's not like you've got a badge to do it legally anyway."

His friend snorted softly and Ressler caught his gaze. "Hey, I just need your word you won't run."

"I won't run, Ress."

Ressler nodded, reaching a hand out for his shoulder. His wedding had been disrupted, but Jacob seemed to be living in a whirlwind that just wouldn't stop. He knew that he could easily tip over the edge, and if he ran he would do just that. At least here, like this, even if Ressler was uncomfortable with the methods, he didn't think Jacob would fall over the edge into the darkness that they both knew he fought. It was a compromise he would never make for anyone else, but he trusted his partner. Maybe not always to do the right thing, but at least to try.

"Thanks, Ress," Jacob managed, his voice rough. "I'll be in touch. Promise."

Ressler nodded and released him, watching his friend move towards his vehicle. Ressler wasn't sure that there was a right answer for all of this. He wanted to trust the system, and he thought that if he were careful, he still could. Jacob had never had his faith in it though. Now he never would. Ressler just hoped that they could all come out of this somewhere close to whole.

With a sigh he reached for his keys. Audrey was waiting for him.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: The wedding day is over and now it's time to run. Anyone have any predictions on if Jake will stand by his word to not run or not?

Next time - Jacob makes a visit to the DMV, Meera meets Mr Solomon, and the team rallies together off books to discuss their options.


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter Thirty-Nine**

The city had gone mad looking for Elizabeth Phelps. Her photo seemed to be showing up on every news station, but the actual push of manpower was just slightly delayed. It had provided them with the out that they needed while social media showed them clear across town. They had taken a vehicle - clean, registered, and inconspicuous - and driven out of DC before the entire city shut down. The task force was likely to thank for that, slowing it down to give them time. Perhaps Jacob Phelps had proven himself after all.

Reddington glanced in the rearview mirror, seeing Elizabeth stretched out across the back seat. She was sleeping as far as he could tell, and it was just as well. They had quite a ways to go before they met up with Leonard Caul to set the plan into motion. Kotsiopulos was about to become very uncomfortable in the Director's position.

"You haven't asked me about the blackmail file."

"Hmm?" Reddington answered, risking a glance back to see her deep blue eyes trained on him.

"Your blackmail file. I have it. You know I do. Why haven't you asked for it from me?"

"Because I do know you have it. Your husband told me that it was hidden in a spot in your home when you both left for the wedding, but after you were gone with some of your things, so was it. We have it. We can use it. Seeing it is hardly necessary when we have so much more to handle right now."

She sat up, running her hand through her dark hair. "We need a place to stop off. I have hair dye in my bag."

"We'll do that when we stop for the night."

"Have you heard from Jacob?"

Reddington tried not to sigh. "No, and I won't. He'll be under tight scrutiny from his superiors. Cooper may be on our side with this, but even he can only do so much."

"They'll go after Jacob," she murmured and Reddington's lips thinned.

"Perhaps. We're not entirely without contact. I left him instructions for contacting me through an associate of mine to keep me abreast of any changes on his end."

"Won't they know?"

"This associate may be one of the most irritating people on the face of the earth, but he's discrete. As much as I am loath to admit it, your husband is an intelligent man. He'll do what he can from his end."

"What if they pull his badge?"

"I imagine that will simply free him up so he can do what needs to be done."

Elizabeth grew quiet in the back. "I didn't mean to do this to him," she said after a long moment.

"He's the one that chose to stay, Lizzie. He could have walked at any point."

"And now it could get him hurt."

"He's quite capable of taking care of himself."

"So where are we going?"

"To meet with someone that will be able to help us release the Fulcrum to the world."

"How will that help us?"

"The Cabal is about to learn that you do not cross me. We're going to tear them apart."

* * *

Jacob had gotten there as soon as the DMV opened, but he still had been sitting and waiting for nearly two hours by that point. His back was killing him and his mind wouldn't slow down. Reddington had left this man - Glen Carter was the name - as a point of contact and a potentially useful resource if it came down to that. Jacob had thought that perhaps Red was returning some of the trust the younger man had placed in him, but as he fidgeted in his chair he was beginning to think maybe this was Reddington's idea of a horrible joke. Or a distraction. He wouldn't put it past Reddington to send him on a wild goose chase.

"Number one-ten," a lady called and Jacob glanced down at his slip of paper. _Finally_.

They showed him back to an office and the lady closed the door behind him. Jacob stood and stared at the small man sitting behind his desk, punching away at something on the computer. He stood there for what felt like several exceedingly long moments and began to promise himself that he would find some way to pay Red back if this was some sort of distraction to keep him out of the way.

"You must be the husband," the bespectacled man said suddenly. "Red said you'd be dropping by. Not that you gave me any time or anything."

"I need to get ahold of him."

"Can't be away from the wife more than a night without getting antsy? Damn, she must be good in bed."

Jacob bristled. "Does this seem like some sort of a joke to you?"

Glen Carter snorted and pushed a burner phone across the desk. "He'll contact you when he's ready."

"Great. Now, he said you're a tracker. I need you to find someone."

"Do I look like I have all the time in the world?"

"Considering you're playing computer games while I've been sitting out there, yeah. He calls himself Karakurt." Jacob pulled a photo from his jacket that he'd snagged from the file before leaving. "I need him found as soon as possible."

Glen's nose screwed up as he looked at the photo. "Aren't you a cop of some sort?"

"I don't have my usual resources. Can you do it or was Red exaggerating in your skills?"

That seemed to do it. "I'll find him and I'll find him faster than you Feds ever could," he grumbled.

Jacob smirked and pocketed the phone. "Call me when you have something."

He was barely out the door when it started ringing in his pocket and he fished it out, setting his sunglasses on his nose. "Yeah?"

" _Agent Phelps, good to hear you're moving quickly on this._ "

"And that they didn't detain me?" he pointed out and Reddington snorted on the other end of the line.

" _Yes, well, there were a few possible outcomes. The fact that you got to Glen is one of the better ones. Are you making use of him?_ "

"Yeah, he's a quirky little guy, isn't he? I have him tracking Karakurt."

" _I would have thought you would have used your bureau connections for that?_ "

"They took my badge."

" _Well, that may actually work in our favour. I always did feel that badge limited you on your true potential._ " There was a pause and a voice in the background before the Concierge of Crime cleared his throat purposefully, and when he spoke again, it wasn't to Jacob. " _Lizzie, there's someone on the phone for you._ "

Jacob's steps faltered and he glanced around as he listened to the spun of the phone exchanging hands. " _Hello_?" Liz greeted hesitantly and he forced himself forward, trying to keep his voice and expression casual.

"Hey," he greeted softly.

" _Jacob? Babe, it's so good to hear your voice. I thought…. Red had said he hadn't heard from you. I was starting to worry_."

"Have a little faith in me, would ya?" he teased, opening the door to the vehicle and jumping in. "Are you okay?"

" _Well, I've lived most of my life working in the shadows. Having my name and mugshot all over television is a little unnerving._ "

He thought that was probably an understatement. "You'll be home in no time," he promised.

" _You're going to fix it_?" she asked, the tease soft and a little forced, like she was trying to put him and herself both at ease.

"Absolutely."

She gave a shaky breath. " _It's not just the task force now, babe. It's everyone. I'm on every news station. You guys will…_ "

"We're going to take this Cabal down."

" _Even if you did, things will always be different. Even more than usual. They know who I am. Everyone knows. We'll never…. go anywhere, be able to do anything without people… Jacob, we'll never be able to adopt now_." Her voice hitched and it sounded like the thought had just occurred to her. " _It's my fault. This is… They know me, not just an alias I can leave behind_."

"Hey," he murmured softly, " _I_ know you. I love you, Lizzie, and I'm going to fight for you. I need you to do the same, okay?"

She sniffed and all he wanted to do was hold her and pull her close. " _I will,_ " she promised.

"Good. Listen, babe, I need you to be safe, okay? We're tracking down our first lead."

" _Okay. Be safe. They'll try to get to you too._ "

"I'm a big boy," he promised. "And tougher than I look."

He could almost hear her smile. "I don't deserve you."

Jacob grinned. "You're stuck with me anyway," he told her and that pulled a laugh from her. "Love you. Bye."

The call ended. If he hadn't done it, he would have talked to to her all afternoon. He had plenty to do, and if he wanted to bring her home safely, he needed to focus.

He pulled in along the street and was through the first door before catching the feeling that something was off. Hudson had gone with his parents to New York and Jacob carefully reached for his gun that was holstered at the small of his back.

"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't shoot me, Phelps," a familiar voice said and Jacob instantly released the gun as Samar Navabi flashed him a grin and held a key up. "Ressler lent it to me. It might have looked odd if I was just sitting outside your home."

"What are you doing here?"

"Collecting you. They're watching phone lines, so it's better to do things in person. Everyone's meeting at Cooper's to discuss our next step."

"Our next-?"

"What? You thought we were going to let you have all the fun?"

"I just… I guess I figured we'd go at it from different angles."

Samar shrugged. "We're a team. Come on. I'm driving. Ressler warned me about yours."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "He's got to stop doing that. It was _one_ time!"

The Persian woman quirked an eyebrow. "I heard twice, but that's alright. He said that you don't have any memory of the second one."

Jacob rolled his eyes dramatically. "At least I don't run into them every chance I get," he grumbled and followed her out the back door.

* * *

Meera stood outside of the Director's office and waited. She felt she was doing that more and more these days. The death of Tom Connolly had been poorly timed and it had sent things spiraling. She had heard rumours that Jacob Phelps had been suspended, but she was in limbo until she received orders. She only hoped that the Director still trusted her. If she lost that trust she would find herself in a dangerous position with little help.

The CIA officer glanced down at her watch. They were supposed to meet at AD Cooper's personal residence between three-thirty and five, trying to keep from drawing too much attention by bringing them all in separately. As it stood, she had nothing to report, but she hoped the meeting would change that.

"Ms Malik?" Meera looked up to see the secretary smiling at Kotsiopulos just asked to see you in."

"Thank you," she offered and followed the other woman into the office.

There was another man in the office. Tall, dark skinned, and when he glanced over it took Meera everything she had to keep her expression even. He smiled, and while it was charming enough, there was something sinister about it. "Agent Malik."

"I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage," she said carefully.

"Mr Solomon here was on his way out," Director Kotsiopulos offered before turning a purposeful gaze on the younger man. "I expect this to be dealt with by tomorrow, am I clear?"

Solomon's smile didn't waver. "Peter, it's under control."

Meera watched him move out. "I assume there's something involving the Rostova case?"

Kotsiopulos sighed. "The fiasco with the breech at the black site allowed her to rid herself of her tracker. She and Reddington have gone to ground. It's only a matter of time though. A woman of her… talents works from a place of anonymity. Take that away from her and she'll falter, even with Reddington's help."

She pulled in a breath and took a risk. "Director, I hope I'm not overstepping myself here, but this… I understand what you were getting at after the bombing. I wanted to give Rostova the benefit of the doubt. I let my personal connections get in the way. I won't let that happen again."

"That's good to hear. I'm sure you've heard her husband was suspended."

"I'd heard whispers. Phelps is blinded, sir. It was the best move."

"I think he knows where she is. I was there for the interrogation. The man is good. A very talented liar."

"He's one of the best I've seen."

"I believe he's working with her."

Kotsiopulos' gaze slid to watch for her reaction and Meera met it. "If he is, sir, then I may not be the one you want on this case. This is… personal. I'm not sure I could be objective when I caught up with him."

The Director smiled. "I'm counting on your personal connections. We're watching his phone now, the people he's meeting with. I want to make sure that when we move, I know where your loyalties lie."

"Understood."

"Good. Always a pleasure, Ms Malik."

* * *

"Finding her has to be our top priority," Ressler said as he leaned back against the cabinets in Cooper's kitchen. "Reddington can't protect her from this. All Jake did was put himself in the crosshairs by calling him. If they don't know already they will."

"Jacob put himself in the crosshairs when he took the fall for you," Cooper pointed out, handing Ressler a glass of whiskey.

The younger agent nearly asked if it wasn't just a little early for that, but stopped himself. With the mess they were in, what did it matter? He frowned and took a sip.

"But we're not going to leave him there alone, right?" Aram, who had taken a quiet seat at the kitchen table, asked.

Cooper chuckled, glancing towards Ressler. "You know, when you put his name into the mix nearly a year ago, I thought you'd lost your mind," he chuckled. "I'd heard of him. He's borderline reckless at times, but I've seen that that stems from loyalty. Agent Phelps may not get close to many people, but when he does he makes it count. I say we do the same."

Ressler felt a small smile tilt his lips. "Never questioned that we would for a second, sir," he said and they clinked their glasses together, Aram grinning from his place.

The front door opened with the sound of a knock accompanying it. "Meera said she's going to be late and to start without her," Samar called, moving into the kitchen with Jacob in tow.

Cooper nodded. "Thank you everyone for coming. Before we get started, I'd like to make this clear that this is an unofficial meeting. Nothing that is said here will leave this house. If you are uncomfortable with that, now is the time to leave."

Ressler took another long sip of his drink, but didn't budge. He glanced over at his friend. "Audrey said you owe her a really nice dinner once we get Liz back safely."

Jacob offered him a thin smile. "And a really nice bottle of wine once the kid's born."

"Maybe two."

Cooper cleared his throat, pulling their attention back in line. "The only way we have a hope of beating this Cabal is by using every resource at our disposal. We're not throwing the rulebook out-" he glanced over at Jacob who shrugged innocently - "but we may have to bend the binding a little. What do you know?"

Jacob pulled in a deep breath. "Reddington came and picked Liz up yesterday before I got back to the Post Office. I don't know where they are and they'll be changing phones so much that I won't be able to initiate contact. I have a tracker looking for Karakurt. He'll reach out to me when he's found him."

"What can we do?" Aram asked from his seat.

"Our jobs," Ressler said. "I know you don't agree, Jake, but I really think the best way to protect her is to bring her in. They're chasing her out there. At least if we have her in the Post Office we can protect her."

"What? Protective custody forever? No," Jacob answered sternly. "Listen, Ress, Liz wants a real life. So do I. We have to take these bastards apart or they'll take us. I know you think the system is solid, but it's not. Us though? We're solid. This team."

"I know, Jake."

Jacob grinned and reached out to grab his good shoulder. "Going against every fiber of your being, I know."

"For you, buddy."

He stopped and Ressler saw the confident façade crack just a little. "I know. Thank you. All of you."

"We're a team," Samar said.

A knock came at the front door and Cooper disappeared momentarily, returning with Meera. She looked worn and more than a little unhappy. "I'll need to make this brief. They're tapping phones, they're watching meetings. They think you know where she is," she directed at Jacob, who shot Ressler his best _I told you so_ look.

"I don't."

"Just be careful," Meera warned. "I'm doing my best to get into position so they trust me with the task of cornering you. Someone will do it eventually, and at least if it's me we'll know what's going on."

"Have you gotten any leads? Hard evidence yet?" Ressler prompted.

"I'm gaining trust now. I understand time is if the essence, but if I blow my cover it will all be for nothing."

"And it could get you killed," Cooper acknowledged. "Keep doing what you're doing. Jacob, I can't give you orders without your badge, but… watch your back. You're still a part of this team."

"Thank you, sir. Like I told Ress. I'm not going anywhere." Ressler glanced over and found his partner reaching into his pocket and pulling out a phone he didn't recognize. He offered them a smirk. "Except to take this. I'll be around. Call me if you get anything on your end and I'll do the same."

"Jake-?" Ressler started, but he held up his hand.

"I have to take this."

"I'll swing by tonight and we'll talk."

Jacob looked like he was about to argue, but shrugged instead. "Okay," he said and pulled the phone to his ear as he walked out of Cooper's home.

Ressler knew that tone. He was going to be balancing a thin line, trying to predict what he could tell them and what he thought he had to do on his own. He'd fooled the others with the act, but Ressler had known him too long. Jake was worried for them, and when he got like that, he tried to take things in alone.

He sighed, turning his attention back to the others. Hopefully Jacob would at least trust him if no one else.

* * *

Jacob had never heard someone say so much nothing before in his life. Glen had babbled on for nearly fifteen minutes - all the while Jacob had tried to cut in - before the sidelined FBI agent had finally ended the call and called him back to get a word in. It wasn't like that had really done much more than irritate the tracker and start him yelling. It was more than Jacob was willing to handle that evening.

The dark haired man tossed his keys into the bowl and set his gun down next to them, the townhouse quieter than he was comfortable with Without Hudson to greet him at the door. At least the first time Liz had disappeared he had had the dog. Now, the only comfort he had was the hope that they could clear everything up before the Cabal found her.

Jacob moved sluggishly through the house, not even bothering with the lights as he stopped at the cabinets in the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of scotch and a glass. He rarely drank on it, but Reddington's increasingly frequent visits to the Phelps home had certainly put a dent in it. Jacob shook his head and poured some into the glass, knocking it back in one swallow. He was about to pour another when a small noise caught his attention.

He set the liquor bottle down carefully, eyes scanning the dark room. Something was off. He couldn't quite place it, but Meera's warning came to mind. He reached back for his gun and found nothing, remembering that he had left it at the door. He started for it, senses on high alert. He turned the corner into the living room and pulled back last second, the blow aimed for his jaw just barely missing.

Jacob pulled back and swung around as his attacker came at him, his kick missing as the other man anticipated and jumped back, but Jacob was on him in half a beat, reaching out for the gun that his opponent was leveling at him. He got his hands on it, but the other was just as quick and even as Jacob pulled it away it went skidding away across the wood floors and out of reach. He slammed a hard punch into his attacker and sent him stumbling.

"Well," the man said, fingering his split lip, "they told me you were good. A challenge."

Jacob tilted his head, studying him. He was tall, with dark skin, and there was something just a little off about his eyes. "Who are you?"

A lazy sort of smile crossed his lips and he pulled a knife out and flipped it open. "I do like a good challenge."

Jacob set his jaw, ready to move as soon as he got a read on the man. He was difficult, but not impossible. The knife gleamed in the man's grasp and he moved fast. Jacob dodged to his left, pivoting around as he did and he switched his direction at the last moment to avoid a major blow, but the knife still caught him, leaving a deep gash along his ribs. He hissed in pain and found himself shoved hard against the bookcase, the bloody knife against his throat.

"Something you should learn very quickly, Mr Phelps - Jacob? May I call you Jacob? - is that resisting will only cause you pain."

Jacob smirked. Pain, not death. They needed him alive. "You'll learn pretty quick how stubborn I can be." He kicked out, the knife dropping enough so that he had room to throw his head forward and connect with his attacker's. He sent him stumbling back and to the floor. Jacob darted forward, reaching to grab him by the collar and haul him up to finish it. This man wanted to try to use him to get to Liz? It was time Jacob sent a message to the Cabal. He'd be damned if they used him against her.

His attacker had gone down hard with the blow, dazed by a hit he hadn't expected. That's what Jacob had thought and that's how he reacted, but the man grabbed his shoulder and hung on as he drove the knife in deep. The pain hit hard, pulling a choked sound from him, and before Jacob knew it his fingers had loosed around his attacker's collar and the other man was easing him onto his back in the floor almost carefully, the knife still buried in his gut. He could feel the world pulsing around him and he found that lazy smile over him. "I told you struggling wouldn't help you. You shouldn't let your emotions get out of hand. They won't help her."

Jacob coughed hard, unable to pull enough breath in to speak. The smirk above him was growing dimmer, and as his eyes fluttered closed and unconscious pulled him under Liz's smile was all he wanted to see.

* * *

TBC

Notes: Well... I'm curious if anyone saw this coming or if it caught you by surprise? I've had it in mind that I was going this route for a while now, but it seems like several of my readers thought he would end up taking off with Liz, so I'm curious about the reaction. Trust me, I have a plan. :)

Poor guy, though, getting shot in canon, stabbed in the AU. Jacob just can't catch a break.

Next time - Ressler finds his partner missing, Jacob faces his captor, and Samar is chosen for an undercover assignment to bring them closer to answers.


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter Forty**

Donald Ressler stood on his friend's porch for what felt like a short eternity before he finally started digging for the spare key. He had left him a voicemail the night before telling him that he would drop by the next morning before heading into the office instead of that night. He had shown up early, coffee and pastries in hand, but so far there was no answer at the door.

The townhouse was quiet when he entered and when he called Jacob's name it seemed to bounce off the emptiness. Ressler frowned, brows drawn together as he looked around. His partner's keys were in the bowl by the door and as he glanced down the hall and into the kitchen he saw a bottle of liquor on the counter. If he was sleeping off a hangover upstairs, Ressler was going to be pissed.

He sighed as he turned, ready to trudge up the stairs, but stopped as he passed the living room, his eyes widening at the mess left in the wake of what must have been a fight. His gaze shifted to the carpet and he felt his chest tighten at the marks he could see. Books were scattered, the shelf knocked wholly to the floor. Drawers were open as if someone had been searching for something and the carpet pulledup to get a better view of the floorboards beneath. Then there was the blood staining the carpet where the coffee table had been. That was definitely blood. Ressler forced himself to breathe as he knelt down, fingers touching it and finding it dry. It hadn't been there the last time he was in his friend's home, but it had to be a few hours old at least. They had come for him. Meera had said they would, but none of them had expected it to be so quickly. If Ressler had come over the night before like he'd planned, maybe he could have stopped it.

Ressler pulled his phone from his coat pocket with numb fingers, somehow managing to dial. His voice was distant even to his own ears as he muttered his friend's address and requested a team to be sent to go over everything for forensic evidence. By the next call, he'd found his voice a little more, but it still trembled. "Sir? It's Ressler. I dropped by Jake's this morning. His place is a wreck. The Cabal's been here." He managed a breath. "They took him. He's gone."

There was a pause on the other end and Ressler could hear Cooper shifting. " _Have you called it in yet_?"

"Yeah. There's a team on the way."

Cooper sighed. " _I would have rathered handled this in-house. I'm sending Navabi over there now._ "

"I'll let her in."

" _Find as much as you can before the team gets there, am I clear, Agent Ressler_?"

"Yes sir." He ended the call, gripping the phone hard in his hand. Cooper didn't even trust the team being sent. If they couldn't trust their own people, just who was he supposed to trust?

Ressler looked up, a buzzing sound faint, and he followed it until he found a small burner phone that had been tossed aside, possibly in the struggle. He bent down and flipped it open.

" _Please. Take your time answering_ ," a clipped voice sounded in his ear.

"Reddington?"

There was a pause, as if the older man, for once, had been caught off guard. " _Donald. Where is your partner_?"

"I'm at his place now and there was a struggle."

" _And Agent Phelps_?" Reddington asked quietly, and Ressler imagined Liz was close by.

Ressler's gaze swept the space again, wishing for anything that would give him hope that his friend was just chasing his attackers down. "Keys are here, place is wrecked, but it doesn't look like it all happened in the fight. They were probably looking for your file. I'm waiting on forensics and hoping the blood isn't Jake's."

" _You'll never see any results that will help you find him_ ," Reddington said certainly. " _The Cabal will see to that. Do you understand now, Donald? Now that they've taken someone_ you _care about? The Cabal will not stop until we stop them. They will not stop just because your team tells them to. If you want to save him you will need to be willing to bend a bit. Their corruption goes deeper than you could ever imagine._ "

Ressler frowned, his mind racing. Jake has always been the one to walk the line between them, pulling Ressler towards it and Ressler making sure that his friend didn't fall off to the wrong side. It had worked over the years that they had been partners and friends. They found balance that they never would have found with someone else. The idea that they had taken him - injured and bleeding and who knew what else - shook him deeper than he was willing to admit. "Are you going to work your side of it?"

" _No_ ," Reddington answered without pause.

"What?"

" _This will fall on you, Donald. My focus must remain on keeping Elizabeth safe. She is my priority._ "

"They'll kill him," Ressler breathed.

" _Yes, they will_ , _and despite my best efforts I will likely even mourn that loss, but not so much as I would his wife, and Elizabeth would throw every bit of her training out and rush in blindly to save him if she knew. Best of luck, Donald._ "

The call ended and Ressler stood in his friend's living room, a numbness spreading with the full weight of what was happening pressing down. Jacob was gone. The Cabal had taken him and Reddington wasn't going to offer any help. Cooper agreed with Red that the corruption ran deeper than any of them had known and it set Ressler's world teetering on edge. Maybe Jacob and Cooper were right. It terrified him to think so, but the idea of losing his friend - a man that was the closest thing to a brother that he had ever had - to his own unwavering worldview was more terrifying than just that. His father had been killed because of corruption, because his partner had betrayed him. Now, Ressler realized that if he didn't risk bending the rules, his own partner would die. He didn't think he could live with that.

A knock came at the front door and he saw Samar Navabi there. He opened it and spoke before she had a chance. "The forensic team won't be far behind. Let's see what we can find first."

She quirked an eyebrow. "We're working around them?"

He offered a stiff nod. "I don't think we have a choice of we want to save him."

"Good to have you on board."

"You said it earlier. We're a team… and I think the only ones we can trust until this gets figured out."

"Then let's make sure the Cabal doesn't leave here with evidence that can help us find him," Samar said firmly and they both started their search.

* * *

They were moving faster than Meera had ever imagined that they would. She had received the call that Phelps had been taken. Thankfully Ressler and Samar had made it to the scene before the people outside of their team did, as the only evidence that didn't turn up missing from the search was the fact that the blood matched their teammate's. How badly he was hurt - or if he was even still alive - they had no way to know and, so far, no solid leads. It had been nearly three days since he had disappeared and something had to be done.

Meera just hoped that she wasn't risking her cover by taking a step she felt needed to be taken.

"Ms Malik," Kotsiopulos greeted as he entered the sitting room outside of his office. "I wasn't aware we had a meeting scheduled.

"I thought that this shouldn't wait."

"Please," he offered and she followed him into the office. "What's troubling you, Ms Malik?"

"I would assume you've heard that Jacob Phelps is missing?"

"Agent Ressler has filed it as an abduction."

"Agent Ressler is too close to see what's happening," Meera answered immediately, watching for any tells the Director might give her.

"And what do you see?" he asked her, taking a seat behind his desk.

"I think Phelps ran. He set it up well, but he's smart. He's trained as an undercover operative by the FBI, so it's not a stretch that he would be able to fake his own capture to throw them off the trail."

"You think this is an elaborate forgery?"

"I do. I think he'll meet up with Reddington and Rostova. He's put distance between everyone and himself and then just disappears? I'm not buying his conspiracy theory about the… Cabal, I think he called it."

She felt his gaze on her, studying her, and looking for any lie that might be hidden in her statement. After a long moment he loosed a breath. "I'm inclined to agree with you. I have an asset that I've brought in for our leg of the manhunt. I believe you met him. Mr Solomon."

"I did. Briefly."

"I'm assigning you to work with him. I need this dealt with, and I trust you can speed up the search."

"Of course."

"I'll make the arrangements and be in touch."

"I'll wait for the call."

She turned and walked from the office, unwilling to let her composure shift until she was out of the building. She was halfway out the door when she heard her name and turned, finding David waving at her. "Hey," he greeted. "I've left you a couple of voicemails since that whole wedding fiasco…"

"It's been crazy."

"Yeah. My sister called and said that she's watching the kids? You must be running like crazy." He offered her that charming grin that she hated to admit that she liked. "Could have given me a heads up? I could have taken them."

Meera pursed her lips together. It wasn't like she could explain why he was suddenly a dangerous option for their children. "I knew you've been busy. Sorry, things have been hectic."

"Must be if you're hedging the truth with me," he answered and raised his hands in mock surrender. "I get it. Not judging." She grimaced and he offered her a smile. "What about lunch?"

"What about it?"

"How about grabbing some? We can talk about anything but work."

"David.."

"Don't say no?" he pleaded softly. "I really had a good time the other night… Well, before the AG turned up dead," he chuckled and reached out, his hand taking hers. "I've missed you, Meer."

She swallowed hard. "I… can't do this right now, David. Rain check?"

His smile faded and he let go of her hand. "Sure. Rain check."

"David, it's not-"

"Hey, don't worry about it. I just… read it wrong. It happens a lot with you, I know. You're a tough one to read." He was trying to keep his voice light and failing miserably. He turned, starting back into the building, but she called out on impulse, stopping him in his tracks.

"David? I have a lot on my plate with work. When it's over, when we get to the bottom of all of this, we should. Lunch. Dinner. Something."

"You mean it?"

"Yes."

His smile returned and he leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. She felt it linger as he turned and started back to his temporary office, leaving her at the door. She had missed him. She ran so hard half the time that it got pushed aside, but every time they were together she remembered it. When this was over, she would go to that lunch with him. She owed it to herself to see if they could be happy again.

* * *

Samar Navabi looked over the paperwork in front of her before glancing up to where Cooper sat across from her and Ressler stood off to the side of the desk, the younger man looking like he'd already read it.

"This tracker that Red put Agent Phelps in touch with seems to think this is where Karakurt is hiding out," Cooper explained. "It's an underground fight ring run by Russian thugs. His sister is supposedly married to the ringleader."

"If we can pull him away, we can offer a deal for his cooperation," Ressler continued. "We can bring in the man responsible for the bombings and for-"

"And he can help lead us to Phelps," Samar said as her dark eyes skimmed the file. "There's a good chance that if he doesn't know where they're holding him, he can lead us to someone that does. It's the best lead we've come across since he was taken. What's the catch?" She could hear it, even if neither of the men had voiced it directly yet.

Cooper looked uncomfortable now. "The missing evidence, the fact that the post office was breached…. The truth is we don't know who we can trust until we unravel this."

"And we need someone to go undercover."

Samar smirked. "Well, they would see _you_ a mile away. I have undercover experience, so I'll go in alone," she answered with a shrug.

"That's-"

"Stop," she cut Ressler off. "It's what works in our situation. Meera is already in with the Cabal, Jacob is missing-"

"You know I have the same training as Jake on undercover work, right?" Ressler groused. "We graduated Quantico together."

"And he came out with top marks in the field because he's one of the best in the bureau when it comes to undercover assignments." She took a breath. "It's not that I question your skill. You could probably work it in your favour. I've seen you do it, but if I may be blunt? You're too close. We're all worried about him, but he is your closest friend. It's to be expected. He was your best man at your wedding and you two have been partners for years. I'm not judging you on it, but I also can't rely on you to make solid decisions if your attention is split." She watched Ressler tense at the statement, but he didn't deny it. "I'll work this angle. When I need backup, I'll call you for it, but I have been known to work well alone."

Cooper nodded slowly. "We're all going to be stretched thin for this. Anything you need for it, Agent Navabi, you have it."

"Information on the fight club. I'll find my in and get things started."

"If you need anything…" Ressler tried, but Samar offered him a tight smile.

"For you to be ready to act on any intel I get so we can rescue our team member."

He nodded and she took the file. She had a lot of work to look at. There wouldn't be any sleep that night, but that was alright. For the first time in some time, she'd found a team that felt more like family than work associates. Slightly dysfunctional and often irritable family, but family nevertheless. And two of their own were in trouble. They could sleep when this was over.

* * *

He woke to a dimly lit room and pain. Dark blue eyes blinked hard, trying to clear his vision as best as he could, and when he shifted Jacob could hear chains rattling around his ankles.

It took a moment for his fogged brain to register, but pain struck half a beat after he moved and a moan escaped him as his hands moved to the source of it. His fingers found gauze wrapped around his midsection, fastened into place. Slowly memories started coming back, and he grimaced. They had taken him. Despite his determination that they wouldn't be able to use him to get to Liz, they had taken him, and that's exactly what they were going to try to do with him.

"Good morning," a voice greeted cheerfully and Jacob looked over, finding the man he'd fought with in his home. He was rolling the sleeves back of his expensive shirt, moving slowly down the steps to where Jacob was chained. That lazy smile still rested on his lips and he squatted down. "You don't look like you're feeling well. I told you that fighting me on this would only cause you pain. You may be good, but I'm better."

"Who are you?" Jacob managed, his voice raspy.

"Matias Solomon. You and I are about to spend a lot of time together, Jacob. As much as is needed until you tell me where your wife is."

"I don't know," he answered automatically.

Solomon tilted his head briefly before reaching forward, hand clamping down hard on Jacob's injury. A cry escaped him as his body tried to jerk away automatically, but he found his back against an unmoving wall and Solomon leaned in. "Don't lie to me."

"I'm not," Jacob gasped. "I don't…" his vision swam dangerously and Solomon released him.

"They would have a way to contact you."

"Not that stupid. 'Course you'd come after me. I don't…" He pulled in as deep of a breath as he dared and turned his glare on his captor. "I don't know where she is. I don't have a way to contact her, and even if I did you'd never be able to beat it out of me. This isn't my first time."

Solomon stood slowly, as if trying to decide if he believed him or not. He tilted his head a little and snorted, pulling a phone from his pocket and snapping a picture. "Then you know that you don't get to die until I'm sure that you're not useful. You don't have to know where she is to draw her out."

The words threatened to send a chill down his spine, but Jacob kept his expression impassive. He watched as Solomon walked out, the door clanging loudly behind him and he waited several moments before letting the mask shatter and curling into himself. Blood was already seeping through the bandages and he grimaced against the lingering pain. He would try to use that proof of life to make Liz come out of hiding. All Jacob could hope for was that Red wouldn't let her and he would somehow find a way to stop her. Jacob didn't think he could lose her again. Not like this.

* * *

Reddington looked up from his place as Dembe entered the room, a phone in hand and a solemn look on his face. The Concierge of Crime reached out without a word and took it, his eyes focusing on a photo that had been sent through.

"It was texted to an old number," Dembe explained, "but it was forwarded through."

So Jacob Phelps was alive after all, though Donald had been right. The Cabal had him.

"What is it?"

Reddington looked back to where Elizabeth was trying to get a look and he snapped the phone closed. "Just a piece of the puzzle," he told her and looked back to Dembe. "Forward it to Donald."

"What piece?" she demanded from behind him. "Listen, you can't just keep me in the dark on this. It's my life and I can-"

"You are very capable of watching after yourself," Reddington assured her, "but this is out of even your league. No, Elizabeth, you'll need to trust me. Can you do that?"

She bristled. "Have you heard from Jacob?"

"He's quite busy," he said evasively. "Everyone is doing their part to resolve this matter."

"I'm worried about him," she confessed softly. "What if-"

"Your husband is quite capable, Lizzie."

She nodded and took a seat next to him on the couch. "When is this Leonard Caul supposed to get here?"

"First thing tomorrow unless plans change."

"We've been in the run for days now and he's changed the location and time of the meet twice already."

"He's not the most trusting sort."

"Neither am I."

Reddington offered her a smile and, on impulse, covered her hand with his. He was pleased that she didn't immediately jerk away. "My priority is your safety. Your life. You _will_ make it through this, Elizabeth."

She nodded slowly and he gave her hand a squeeze. He couldn't tell her about Jacob. She would rush off and try to save him, which would be exactly what the Cabal wanted. No, his priority would remain Elizabeth. All he could do was offer Donald a chance to save his partner and hope that she wouldn't hate him if it couldn't be done.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, that was an intense episode on Thursday. I'm not worried about Gina showing back up with the exception of that probably leading to her death. Pretty sure I saw a gun on Jacob's knee in the promo (he'd be an idiot if he showed up unarmed) and my guess is he's tying up loose ends. Good heavens though the fandom is in the middle of an utter meltdown. For once the Keen2 ship feels a little safer, at least for now. If anyone here reads Truth in the Lies (and I know some of you do), I may be working on a one-shot today for that if I can find the time/get it started. We'll see. Cute Keen2 fluff since our poor babies are separated in this story :(

I know that my updates haven't been quite as quick as they used to be, and I'm sorry for that. I'm still three chapters ahead (once I post this one) in the writing process, but my last arc that I'll be starting on around ch 45 or 46 is still very much in flux in my mind. Spoiler alert: it has to do with Katarina, and I feel like we may be getting something on her in the next few episodes, so I feel like it could blow any theories out of the water and screw with the writing, so I've tried to slow things down here. I still plan to, unless Blacklist completely destroys my theories, update twice a week or so. As always, I love to hear from you!

Next time - Liz demands answers from Red about Jacob, Meera takes a risk, and the team finds out a secret having to do with their boss.


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter Forty-One**

Red was lying to her. Liz had a pretty good ear for a lie. It was what she did, and Red was lying to her.

She watched him from her place at a table of the little diner, her hat pulled down close to her face. This wasn't the first time she had questioned him, but she had to admit that his resources had made running easier than it would have been alone. Her face was plastered on every TV screen. The feds not only knew her name and face, but they had her on their most wanted list. All she had wanted was some symbolance of a normal life with Jacob, but she hadn't even spoken to her husband in over a month now. Every time she brought it up to Reddington, he assured her that it was safer for her not to.

Her self-proclaimed protector slipped into the booth across from her, a smile plastered on his face. "The strawberry milkshakes in this place are delicious. You really must try one, Lizzie. It'll help your mood."

"Talking to my husband will help my mood."

There was the briefest flicker in Reddington's expression. "You'll need to be patient, Lizzie."

That had been his mantra, and every time before something had fallen down around them I interrupt the conversation. "I've been patient. For a month. What's happened, Red? I can't work with you if I can't trust you. You _know_ that,"

He grimaced and leaned back in the booth. "I do know that."

"Then where is my husband? Even if he'd taken a deep cover assignment to find a lead, he would have reached out at some point." She watched him, noting the small changes in his expression.

"Elizabeth," he said very quietly, "releasing the Fulcrum to the media put an even larger target on our - and yes, even your husband and his team's - backs. Communication must be kept to a minimum. I know this is difficult to accept, but you know that it's true. You're not a novice at disappearing."

"No, I'm not," she said tightly, "and if you can't give me the truth, this is the last you'll see of me. Good luck, Red. It's been… bizarre." She stood, slipping out of the booth and nearly turning into another patron in her rush to leave.

The man stopped, blinked, and she saw recognition cross his face. "Are you who I think you are?"

"No." She moved to slip past him, but he moved with her.

"You are. You're blonde, but you're that chick from the news."

He was speaking loudly enough for others to hear and she could feel eyes turn on her. She pulled in a breath and flashed a smile. "That Phelps lady?" she asked. "Wow, thanks buddy. I'll tell you, though, pick up lines work a lot better when you're not calling a girl by a terrorist's name. Thank you but no."

His expression melted into one of utter discomfort, just as she had predicted, and she started past him again. Liz wound around the back as if she were going to the restrooms, but had her hand on the door to leave when a voice stopped her. "Let me see your hands."

She raised them slowly. "This is a mistake," she told the man behind her.

"Sure it is. Turn."

Liz did as instructed and saw Reddington approaching from behind, his footsteps silent. She watched with a curious expression as Red pressed the gun to the man's back. "Is she really worth your life?"

"Is she worth yours, buddy? Because you're going away for a long time if you shoot a cop."

Reddington chuckled. "You wouldn't be the first. Lower your gun now."

Slowly and very irritably, the plain clothes cop lowered his weapon and Reddington nodded before clicking him hard in the back of the head, sending him crumpling to the floor. "Your bag, Lizzie," he said, offering the forgotten belonging

She leveled a glare and snatched it away. "Jacob."

"A simple thank you would suffice."

"Why haven't I been able to speak to my husband?"

Reddington frowned. "We'll walk and talk. There's no reason to linger."

He strode past her and she followed, dread filling her. Jacob was dead and he feared her reaction. That was the most likely scenario for his attitude. She swallowed hard, doing what she could to steel herself for the worst.

"Before we speak about this, I need your word, Lizzie, that you won't do anything rash."

"Promise. Now spit it out," she growled.

Reddington winced at her tone and fished a burner from his pocket. He flipped it open and scrolled through a few files before handing it over to her as Dembe pulled a different car than they had arrived in around. She slipped into the backseat with him and pressed play on the video.

The first second or so was blurry as the camera focused in on a dark room and on a man that was leaned up against the far wall. He was beaten and bruised, but she recognized him instantly and her terror only grew. He looked ill, his colour terrible and as the camera focused in she could see the beads of sweat standing against his skin, but he was shivering, a thin blanket pulled around him tightly.

"When did you get this?" she managed.

"This one came in yesterday," Reddington answered softly.

"There've been more?"

"Yes. Once, sometimes twice a week. They're proof of life videos to draw you out."

"Then the Cabal has him. We can't just leave him, Red."

"I've forwarded them on to his team, Elizabeth. They're doing what they can-"

"They don't have the stomach for what _needs_ to be done," she hissed.

"You gave your word, Elizabeth. Nothing rash."

She bristled. "I want to speak to him. You have the phone they've been sending these from."

"Absolutely not. You are my priority. His team will find him if he's to be found."

"Look at him, Reddington! He's hurt! They're _torturing_ him!"

"This isn't his first time. He's survived it before, he can do it again. Have some faith in your husband, Lizzie."

She stiffened. "Survived it before?" she echoed.

Reddington tilted his head. "I suppose there are still some things that you don't know about Jacob Phelps."

"I'll tell you something, Reddington. If this is going to work, if you want me to trust you, don't you dare try to turn me on him, even if you think it'll protect me in the end."

"I wouldn't dream of it."

"Good. Here's the deal: nothing rash, but I want to be kept in the loop with everything. We're partners in this. You're not saving me."

"Very well," he said stiffly and Liz offered a smile. Lying to Raymond Reddington so boldly might not be the safest option, but she didn't have a choice. He was going to leave Jacob to rot and she'd be damned if she let him.

* * *

There were steady sounds that never seemed to cease. The whirl of some sort of power generator, the sound of the guard's boots traipsing up and down the hallway outside, and the hitched, rasping sound of his own breathing. Jacob couldn't tell if that was his favourite or least favourite sound. Hearing it meant he was still alive, still fighting, but it made him cringe all the same. Every breath in and out hurt, often leading to a deep, painful cough that shook his entire body. He had no idea how long he had been down in that windowless hellhole that they had dropped him in, but it had been enough time for the knife wound that Solomon had left in him to finally close all the way so that the beatings they put him through didn't rip it open again. There were new injuries, of course, but at least that one was closed.

He had been fighting a fever off and on, likely from an infection, and the latest bout with it had left him sicker than he cared to admit. He couldn't sleep and half the time he couldn't even sit up without leaning heavily back against the wall. Days and nights blurred together without being able to see outside, and he often found himself curled on the thin, dirty mattress shivering so hard he couldn't sleep. The blanket that they'd finally tossed his way did little to keep the cold out, which was funny, because at least when he'd been taken it was the dead of summer. Maybe he was sicker than he thought.

Jacob winced as another cough clawed its way up his throat and his entire body shuddered against it as his fingers dug into the mattress. His vision was blurry, his contacts long past useless, and he heard an extra set up footsteps that signaled Solomon's visit. The door creaked open loudly and he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to find some way to block it out. He could do that. He'd done it before. He had just never had to block it out for so long before.

"Good afternoon," Solomon greeted cheerfully. "My, you do look terrible."

"You're not getting anything new out of me today, so go away," Jacob rasped, curling a little tighter into himself so that the chains rattled around his bare ankles.

He heard the other man chuckle. "Did you know that I send a video to Reddington on a fairly regular basis? I've sent a few so far, but nothing in return. I was hoping - I've spent a bit too long hoping, I suppose - that you'd be more useful than that, but your girl's not coming for you. She's left you here to die."

"Good. At least that means she's safe."

"Not for long. We have our best men closing in on her. It won't be long."

He was lying. Even as ill and hurting as he was, Jacob could hear the lie in his voice. He didn't dare react to it though.

Solomon stood for several long moments before he moved suddenly and without warning, his boot slamming hard into Jacob's middle and pulled a gasp from him that sputtered its way into a coughing fit that burned at his throat. The other man reached down and grabbed a fistfull of his hair. "Your use has run its course, Agent Phelps. Now you're just taking up room."

"So kill me," he growled. "Or aren't you done having your fun?"

He saw the sadistic smile spread and he closed his eyes, Liz's smile filling his mind. She would be safe. He had to believe that she would be safe, even if he would never see her again. In his own way, in the only way that he could, he was protecting her.

The door opened behind Solomon and Jacob was dropped back to the mattress roughly. He blinked his eyes open and watched as Solomon straightened and moved towards the young man that had interrupted. "I left strict instructions-"

"I know, sir, but this is important." He held up a cell phone. "Elizabeth Phelps is on the line."

Solomon's entire demeanor brightened and Jacob struggled to sit up. He watched the other man take the phone and smile as he spoke. "Ms Phelps. What a pleasure. I was starting to think that you were weren't interested in the videos that we've sent over. Have you enjoyed them?"

Jacob could hear a muddled voice on the other end of the line and he finally pulled himself into the sitting position, every inch of him screaming in protest as he did. He watched Solomon, noting his body language and his tiny tells as someone spoke on the other end of the line. Jacob wouldn't risk believing it was Liz unless he heard her voice himself.

"I'm deeply wounded that you wouldn't believe me, Ms Phelps. I'd be more than happy to _show_ you…" He paused, the smile fading just a tiny bit. "Yes, I suppose that's fair." He looked over, dark gaze coming to rest his captive. "You're wife is on the line for you," he said and held the phone out.

Jacob's hand was trembling as he reached for it and he dropped it before he ever got it up to his ear. Finally, though, he managed, and he hesitated. He wasn't sure what would happen if it wasn't her. " _Jacob_?" Her voice sounded just as afraid as he felt, as if she weren't sure he'd be the one on his end too. " _Babe_?"

"Hey, babe," he greeted, his voice sounding as raw as his throat felt. "You safe?"

" _Yeah. I saw… Jacob, I'm not going to leave you there. You know that, right? I'm going to come and save you_."

He gave a mirthless chuckle that escaped on a breath. "No. You stay away from here. You stay safe."

" _Jacob-_ "

Solomon snatched the phone from his hand and he made a small sound of protest. "Now, Ms Phelps, you've heard his voice. You know he's alive. Should we-" He blinked, pulling the phone away and checking the screen. "Well, she hung up on me."

Jacob snorted. "Shouldn't have pissed her off. Now one of us is going to kill you."

"Ambitious for a dying man."

The injured agent didn't answer, but instead fell back against the wall, somehow still managing to stay upright. It didn't matter. Nothing Solomon said mattered. Liz was safe, and eventually he would get out. He wouldn't give up. Her voice had given him hope.

* * *

David had never been the type to take no for an answer. Sometimes it was charming, sometimes obnoxious. It really depended on Meera's mood, but the more time she spent around her ex husband, the more time they seemed to find outside of business interactions to see each other. While he never blatantly asked her to lunch again, they found themselves in conversations in the hallway, running across each other at the coffee house around the corner, and everywhere inbetween. Touches lingered and looks were caught. It was their beginnings all over again, but this time the stakes were higher and she couldn't risk having him too close. If she did, he might wander in on something like she had planned for that evening.

Meera moved silently through the emptied hallways and was pleased to note that the Director's secretary was, as she had hoped, gone for the evening. She looked down both directions and spoke quietly into the comm in her ear. "Aram, are we set?"

" _We are. The CIA's feeds are insanely hard to get through, did you know that?_ "

"I had a pretty good idea," the CIA officer murmured with a smirk as she pulled her lock picks from her pocket. This had taken nearly a week to plan, but Aram had finally cracked a way to loop the feeds for the cameras outside of the Director's office so that Meera could slip in and out undetected.

Even though Kotsiopulos had put her together with Matias Solomon, she hadn't gained any useful knowledge on Phelps' whereabouts. They were getting desperate, and if they didn't do something to find where they were holding their teammate, Ressler was going to do something rash. He had been driving the rest of them more than a little crazy worrying over his missing partner.

" _Are you in?_ " Aram asked. " _I can't see from this end. I really hope that they have something stored there about his location… Have you seen the last video that Mr Reddington forwarded through to us? It was-_ "

"Aram?"

" _Yes?_ "

"I need to focus," she warned him.

" _Sorry_."

Meera nodded, even if her teammate couldn't see her and heard the small click that indicated that she was in. The office was dark and she moved quickly, flashlight out as she reached over to the computer and started it up so that she could copy files from it. It powered up, and while she waited she stepped over to the file drawers and started making her way through them. "If you were going to hold an FBI agent hostage, what would you file that under?"

" _Treasonous acts?_ " Aram offered.

"If only he were so honest about it." She heard a sound and looked over towards the door, but after several beats she didn't hear anything else and she started back on her search. "I've found some maps. I'm not sure if they mean anything, but I'm sending the pictures through from my phone." She snapped the photos, texting them to Aram and pulled the flashdrive he'd given her from her pocket. "Grabbing the computer files and I'll be done."

" _Make sure just to copy them. You don't want to move or take anything or he'll know you've been there_ ," the technician warned. " _You know, this is kind of cool. I feel a little like Q from the 007 movies. I guess that would make you Bond?_ "

"I'll take it," Meera answered and her smirk turned into a grin as she slipped the disk drive into place. "Alright, it's working."

" _You need about three minutes for it to search and grab what it needs._ "

"And if someone comes in?"

" _Why would they?_ "

"You really think people at the CIA go home at five? Do you?"

" _Point taken_."

Meera watched the progress bar finished up and took it out when it was done, grateful that no one spotted her. "On my way back to the Post Office."

* * *

Deep cover operations couldn't be rushed, and that was something that was easier said than put into practice when one of their own was being held captive. Samar wanted to sink the bastards that were holding Phelps just as much as the others, but if Ressler pushed her one more time she was going to break _his_ nose before she got to Karakurt's.

"If you don't win, they're never going to give you the location."

Samar took a steadying breath. "Who says I didn't win?"

Ressler's gaze swept over her. "You don't _look_ like you won."

She smirked at him. "You should see the other guy." Samar reached into her pocket and pulled a burner phone out, setting it on the desk in front of him. He leaned over and she watched him read off the address listed and give her a long suffering sort of look. "That's it," she assured him. "This time next week we'll have Karakurt."

"That's what you said about the last round."

"No, that's what _you_ said."

"If you two could take a breather for half a moment," Meera grumbled as she strode into the bullpen. "Any luck with the encryptions, Aram?"

Aram looked up from where he had been bent over his terminal since Samar had walked in that morning. "Yes, but I'm still working through the data. By the way, the stuff I'm finding? If they ever found out we stole it it could land us all in prison for a _very_ long time." He looked around and cleared his throat awkwardly. "Which is totally worth it if it brings Agent Phelps and Liz back."

"Anything about Jake yet?" Ressler asked and Samar quirked an eyebrow.

"Not even a word about the procedures we're violating?"

Meera chuckled as she pulled a chair up next to Aram. "Haircut is growing up."

Ressler shot them both a glare. "There are reasons for rules, but… I'm not going to let them get Jacob killed."

"We'll get him back, Agent Ressler," Aram assured him, but then stopped, eyes widening. "I… Is Mr Cooper in yet?"

"Not yet. Why?" Samar asked as she crossed the space to peek over his shoulder. His computer screen showed medical readouts. She leaned in to get a better look, and the more he pulled up the less it made sense. There were conflicting charts of what looked like a cat scan. One showed a healthy brain while the other one showed signs of a tumor growing. Both files bore Harold Cooper's name. "Why would Kotsiopulos have Director Cooper's medical records?" she murmured as she continue urged to study the charts. "Is there anything more?"

"You mean besides the fact that our boss has brain cancer?" Aram murmured sadly.

"There's something wrong about those files," Meera stated. "Keep looking."

Aram nodded and did as he was instructed after a moment, another document popped up on the screen with a Russian name attached to it and a whole file worth of formulas. The agents gathered closer as he scrolled through them, finally coming to the side effects of the drugs and the intended purpose.

"What have we found on those files, people?"

The four agents turned, almost as if caught snooping into something that they shouldn't have been. Cooper quirked an eyebrow and leaned in, some of the colour draining from his face at the sight of the scans. "He has my medical records."

"I haven't finished looking through it all yet, sir," Aram said hesitantly, "but from what I can tell…. You may not be sick at all."

Silence fell across the Post Office bullpen and finally Ressler cleared his throat. "Audrey and I have a friend over at Walter Reed, sir. Audrey was in undergrad with her and… well, I would trust her if you wanted a quiet second opinion, sir."

Cooper was watching them all with a shocked expression plastered across his face. It took a moment, but he finally nodded. "If you wouldn't mind getting me her direct number, Agent Ressler. Aram, send those files up to my office and keep searching for anything on Agent Phelps. We're on a time crunch people. I don't have to tell you that they could decide at any time that he's more trouble than he's worth. We're the ones looking for him and we're the ones that are going to find him."

* * *

TBC

Notes: I don't think I thank you guys enough. As some of you know, I'm pretty active over on Tumblr in the Blacklist community and it's been incredibly rough over there recently. This story and the people I share it with have been a real safe haven though. You guys are amazing. I always love to hear from you. I hope you're still enjoying it as much as I am writing it. :)

Next time - Jacob receives a visitor, Samar fights for her life, Meera's actions catch up with her, and Liz reaches out to Ressler to help save Jacob.


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter Forty-Two**

"Sweetheart, I just think it's best, with everything going on, if you go with your parents for a few days," Ressler said, fingers working at the bridge of his nose and eyes where all the stress seemed to have settled for that day. "Anyway, you said you were wanting to go see your cousins. I'll be fine."

The phone buzzed in his ear, signaling that another call was coming through. "Audrey, I'll call you back." As soon as she murmured her confirmation he switched over. "Ressler."

" _Don_."

Ressler froze, gaze flickering to the door of his office and found everyone out of earshot before he spoke very quietly into the phone. "Liz. What are you doing calling me?"

There was a pause. " _I wouldn't, but I need your help. Jacob needs your help. Red said he's forwarded the videos_."

The agent closed his eyes, the latest video playing across his mind. It had been over a week since anything had been forwarded, and with each passing day he grew a little more worried.

" _Reddington won't go after him, but I will. I think you will too,_ " Liz said bluntly. " _I can't do it alone, though_."

"We don't know where they're holding him," Ressler admitted softly. "We're hoping to pick up Karakurt and-"

" _I have a lead_ ," she cut him off. " _I should know by tomorrow if it's good. I just need backup. I can't take them on alone, and I'll have to move fast on it._ " Ressler heard her pull in a deep breath. " _You said I should have come to you about Connolly. This is me coming to you for Jacob_."

"I know. I'll speak to the others, but we all want the same thing. I just… Liz, I can't promise you'll walk away from it. If anyone else outside of our team is involved-"

" _I'm willing to risk it_."

"Okay. Reach out to me when you have something solid."

The line went dead and Ressler loosed a long breath. _This_ was going to be an interesting conversation, and one that they would have before going after Karakurt.

* * *

The late evening sun was brighter than she had expected, but that could have been due to the fact that they had put a bag over her head. Samar squared her shoulders and brought herself up to her full height, turning a hard look at the man that had delivered her to the location. Next to him was a much smaller man with a wicked grin plastered across his face. "Don't get many ladies here."

She didn't bother with a retort, and finally she saw him flinch ever so slightly under her gaze. A smirk crossed her lips. "I expect more of a challenge this time."

Wherever she had been let off had been abandoned for sometime, making it ripe for this sort of arrangement. The buildings were hollowed out, empty shells of whatever they had once been, and Samar could see a small gathering of people eager to watch blood be drawn.

"You're the big show, lady. They're here to see you, but you'll have to wait your turn."

Samar followed him into the crowd where two men stood ready for a fight. One looked like he should be there. He was tall, and while he wasn't so broad that he dwarfed the other men, the undercover agent could tell he was a fighter. His opponent, though, stood waiting with pent up nervous energy. He looked like a frat boy with his long hair and and thin frame. He might be able to win a boxing match at his Ivy League university, but he looked too far out of his league in this place. The kid would be lucky to survive.

"Who is that?" Samar asked one of the people in the crowd.

The man shrugged. "Some rich kid. My money's on him though."

Samar didn't get a chance to ask why before announcements were made. It was a no-rules set up, with the dirtiest tricks not only allowed, but encouraged. The two men squared up for the fight, the smaller one waiting, and it didn't take long to see that he was able to use his slender build and agility to get around his opponent and land solid blows. She watched him bob around and land a hard blow to the man's nose, sending him stumbling back. He landed a follow up blow and another, sending the man crashing back and hitting the ground hard enough that the sound bounced off of the empty buildings.

Cheers erupted and the winner sagged a little bit, having taken some hard hits himself. Samar used the moment to scan the crowd, finally spotting the ring leader, and next to him Karakurt. She glanced over to a face she recognized as her go between in the crowd and he gave her the barest of nods before turning to leave. He would take the news to Ressler and the team that they had hand selected to bring Karakurt in quietly. She just needed to distract them until backup came and get her hands on him when the feds descended.

"You're up, sweetheart."

Samar glanced over to her opponent and kept her expression steady as the large man offered her a wicked grin. Well, she'd always known this wouldn't be easy.

* * *

He woke to cold water soaking him and Jacob jerked painfully back to consciousness. It took half a beat for him to realize he couldn't breathe and why. His head was being held firmly under water, and when he started fighting back he felt the hand gripping the back of his neck tighten. He fought harder, the feeling of drowning sending panic rushing through him along with memories he had buried deeply more years than he hadn't. His lungs were filling with water. Drowning was the last way he wanted to go.

All at once he reared back, catching the man holding him by surprise. He slammed the back of his head into his nose and was instantly released. He didn't make it to his feet, though, before hands shoved him roughly to his knees.

"Good morning. You were quite reluctant to wake up for us, so I thought we should give you some help."

Jacob leveled a glare at Solomon who was smiling like a shark. His own vision was spotted, but he was determined not to pass out again, even as he coughed hard to try to clear his lungs of the water he had breathed in. "Nothing's changed," he rasped. "Still not giving you anything."

"I've done quite a bit of research on you, Agent Phelps," another voice said and Jacob whipped around, regretting it instantly. Kotsiopulos stood at the door, a barely contained look of disgust on his face. "This isn't your first time being held, is it? You and your partner kept it very quiet, but certain channels do provide a bit of information on it, even if you and your team were in a place you never should have been. We found it very useful in keeping you contained this time."

Jacob snorted. "What's your point?"

Kotsiopulos smirked. "That your attempt to protect your partner and his career by taking the fall for him was pointless. He was the one that should have reported the situation, yet he never mentioned it. Did he help you cover it up as well? We will discredit him, just as you have been. It's not a stretch to imagine that you've gone rogue to help your wife. No one is looking for you, Agent Phelps."

"And you came here to gloat?"

"I came here to show you how worthless all of your efforts have been. Your wife is a fugitive, your partner's days at the bureau are limited, and you, Agent Phelps, are growing less and less useful by the day. We've won. All you are doing is delaying the inevitable."

"Guess I'll just keep delaying it until you put a bullet in my head or I put one in yours."

"Confident, aren't you?"

"You're not getting out of this alive. I'm confident in that."

The Director chuckled and turned to Solomon, speaking lowly to him. Jacob kept his expression carefully blank as the older man left and Solomon turned his attention back. The men holding Jacob tightened their grip and he braced himself for another round.

* * *

Slipping Reddington was difficult at best, but Liz had a few skills that she could pull from. He would know she was gone this time, but if the information panned out it would be worth it. Let him handle exposing the Cabal. She had to save her husband.

Liz stood in the alleyway, waiting on her contact. She was about ready to give up when she heard a noise behind her and she pulled her gun, the man immediately showing his hands. "You're late."

"Yeah, well excuse me for taking extra precautions. I work for dangerous people."

"You've been _found_ by dangerous people," Liz countered. "Where is he?"

"The funds," her contact demanded. "And the-"

Liz moved faster than the man could react, and she pinned him against the brick wall, one hand pressed against his throat and her gun in her other, jammed against his ribs. "Jacob Phelps," she growled. "Where are they keeping my husband?"

The man went rigid and swallowed hard. "They're holding him in the basement level of an old warehouse. The address is in my pocket."

The gun didn't move, but Liz released her grip on his throat to pluck the folded paper from his pocket. "I'll transfer the funds now."

His eyes widened a little. "That's not the whole deal. You promised to get me out of the country. New name, new identity. These people are going to kill me!"

"And you'll have it once I find Jacob Phelps where you say he is. Alive."

"I've given you everything you've asked for."

"You better hope so, because if you've double crossed me in any way the Cabal gets a tip about a snitch."

He swallowed hard and Liz shoved him, turning to leave. She had a phone call to make. It was time to get Jacob out of there.

* * *

Samar hit the ground hard, rolling to avoid a boot that would have broken bones of it had connected. She swept her leg out, her own foot slamming into his knee. The large man intent on beating her senseless grunted and and bent over, catching her by the collar and hauling her to her feet. She needed to stall him until the raid, but that didn't mean she had to get herself killed for it.

She slammed her head forward, catching her opponent off guard and he released her, stumbling back and cursing. Samar didn't wait. She hit hard, not bothering to pull punches. He took a swipe at her and missed.

If Ressler didn't hurry up, this was going to be over.

"FBI! Everyone freeze!"

Everyone scattered.

Samar's attention turned immediately to Karakurt who had a slightly panicked look on his face. He and his brother in law glanced at each other and started to slip through the crowd. She didn't wait, didn't pause as she started for him.

A bodyguard spotted her and took a swing, but she ducked down, the blow missing her, and the roundhouse took him off his feet. Her mark was beginning to look nervous, but his brother in law snorted. "You're worried about your pay when the feds are all over us? Get it together, sweetheart."

She resisted rolling her eyes as she stepped forward, her fingers closing around Karakurt's sleeve and every sense in high alert. "Karakurt," she said firmly, his chosen name making him flinch, "you are under arrest for the bombing in Washington DC, conspiracy, terrorism, and a load of other charges. You will be taken into FBI custody and you-" she glanced over to his sister's husband - "have already wasted enough escape time. You stay any longer and we'll bring you in as well."

"They'll kill me," Karakurt managed.

Samar offered his relative one last glare before he went scurrying off. "I'm not giving you a choice. This place is surrounded. Even if you somehow slipped away, my team would release a public thank you for your cooperation in our ongoing investigation."

"I haven't said anything."

"They won't believe you. Come with us today and we can protect you."

Several agents came up behind her and Samar held up her hand, signaling for them to wait. "Your family has abandoned you, you're surrounded by federal agents, and you really have no choice if you want to live."

For half a moment she thought he was going to run and see how far he could make it. Though after a moment he gave a short nod.

"Good work, Navabi," Ressler said from behind her. "I need to talk to you for a second."

Samar looked to the agent that was cuffing him. "He does not leave our sight, do you understand?" She waited for an affirmative nod before turning so that she could speak to Ressler and watch Karakurt at the same time. "Where were you?" she growled.

"I'm sorry. We got held up."

"You got the call," Samar murmured, realization sinking in and Ressler nodded.

"We've got the location and we have to move now if we're going to save Jake."

"We don't know all of these people. We can't trust them to-"

"I know. That's why I need you to head it up."

"You want me to babysit Karakurt?" Samar growled.

"I want you to keep him alive. We can't take him to the Post Office. Cooper has something set up. I need you to rendezvous with him."

She nodded slowly. Sitting and waiting had never been her forte. "Someone has to do it."

"Someone we trust. Listen, I'd rather have you watching my back from the other end of a sniper rifle, but Karakurt is-"

"I get it," she cut in. "We all have our jobs to do. Go save Phelps."

He nodded slowly and she could see the conflict. It was rolling off of him in waves and caught his gaze. "Ressler, you need to figure out what is more important to you before doing this: your worldview or your partner."

Ressler closed his eyes and pulled in a shaky breath before opening them again, determination replacing doubt. "Thanks."

"I've been on a lot of teams over the years," she said softly. "There's something special about this one."

"We're family," he answered with a small smile.

"In a way, I suppose we are. Keep me up to date."

"Will do," he promised and turned to leave.

Samar stepped towards the terrorist that she was tasked with protecting. "I'll take him from here, thanks," she offered and started leading him away, pulling her phone to her ear. "It's Navabi," she told Cooper. "Where am I taking him?"

* * *

It had been an exceptionally long day, but that was becoming the new normal. Meera tossed her purse and keys down, finally pulling her phone from her pocket and seeing an alert of a text and voicemail. She pulled it up and pressed the phone to her ear.

" _Hey, it's Ressler. Everything is a go. She found him. I texted you the address. Call me as soon as you get this_."

She loosed a long breath. It looked like the day wasn't over yet. At least they had found Jacob. This would be over soon and she could bring her children home and maybe, just maybe, have that dinner she had promised David.

Meera didn't have a chance to hit redial when she spotted a familiar figure on her couch, the back of his head visible over the back, slightly slouched as if he might have dozed off waiting on her. She rolled her eyes. "David, we talked about this," she started, rounding the side of the couch and she felt her world shift under her, her ex-husband's green eyes staring vacantly ahead, blood dried from the gunshot to the chest. "No," she managed, her usual control slipping as she fell to her knees and found no signs of life from the man she still loved.

"It's funny," a voice said from behind her, "but our mutual friend seems to think there might be some files missing from his records. Not that he'll admit it, of course. He's already on such thin ice with our organisation."

She stared at the man who had broken into her home and killed David. "What do you want, Solomon?"

"Missing files and then suddenly Karakurt is arrested. I hear he wasn't processed? I'm sure that was an oversight. The Director will clear that up." He flashed her a dangerous smile. "Your phone, Agent Malik, and before you get any heroic thoughts in your head, please know I am not above harming your children. They're having such a good time with their aunt, aren't they?"

"I'm going to put a bullet through your head," she growled, doing as he demanded.

"Not my chest? That would be more poetic, don't you think? This is your doing, Ms Malik. You knew the risks, yet you played the game anyway." He pulled the phone up to his ear and tsked. "Well, this is exactly what we've been waiting for. Thank you. How many agents will Agent Ressler have with him?" Meera levelled a glare and Solomon smirked. "Your children are how old?"

"Liz and I were going to be his backup. We wanted a small team so we could slip in and out."

"No trust in those around you. Clever," Solomon murmured. "Now, I have some business to attend to. I'm sure you won't get in my way. You have a bit of work yourself, considering the bullet in you me ex husband's chest is from your personal handgun. That may be difficult to explain." He started for the door and paused. "And Ms Malik? You've tested us once. Don't do it again."

She heard her front door close behind him and Meera felt her world crashing down around her as she reached out for David's cold hand and for the first time in years, tears trailed down her cheeks as she held onto him there, unable to bring herself to do anything more.

* * *

Ressler's phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it to his ear, expecting Meera's voice on the other end. Instead, Reddington's voice filtered through. " _Donald, are you with Elizabeth?_ "

"Why would I be with Liz?" he demanded as he glanced around. This was where she had told him to meet her. If they didn't hear from Meera, they would take the location alone. He'd be damned if Jake was stuck in that place any longer.

" _I fear she's done something very foolish_ ," Reddington said. " _She's going after her husband_."

"Why do you think she'd contact me, Red? She knows I'll arrest her the second she would show."

He snorted on the other end of the phone. "If she comes to any harm for your shortsightedness-"

Ressler ended the call and shut the phone off as he spotted Liz. "What is that man? Your father?"

She gave a mirthless chuckle. "Sometimes I wonder. Is it just us?"

"Meera hasn't gotten back to me, so it looks like it. Listen, I will do everything I can to get you a chance-"

"Don't. I know you, Don. Let's focus on getting Jacob out and we'll handle what follows after."

"He'll be okay, Liz."

She looked up at him, gaze conflicted. "Reddington said that this wasn't the first time he's been held like this."

Ressler cringed at the memories that he did his best to push aside rather than dwell on. "It was a long time ago. Before you came into the picture, but yeah."

"He never mentioned it."

"It was a really dark time for him. He did… We never reported it because of what Jake had to do to get out alive. We weren't supposed to be there anyway and…. We don't talk about it." He pressed his lips together thoughtfully. "He's been in here a whole lot longer, Liz."

"He has both of us now. We'll keep him steady," she assured him.

Ressler nodded slowly. That was it, he supposed. Liz understood his partner's darker side, yet somehow, still made him want to be better. It was a strange dynamic, even stranger since the truth had come out, but it worked. It had to work again. He didn't want to get him back just to lose him all over again.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I was determined to write on a Tessler one shot I have in mind today, but EBtY just demanded to be written on, so I edited down a chapter for today. Hope you guys enjoy the surprise update! :D

Next time - Ressler and Liz team up to save Jacob and Reddington tracks down what he believes is a leak in the team.


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter Forty-Three**

The ease in which they entered made her nervous, as if they had known they were coming. Liz glanced across the hall where her husband's partner mirrored her position: back pressed against the wall, gun grasped in hand, and ready for all hell to break loose. He gave her a brief nod and they pivoted around almost in unison. Funny how a singular, common goal could bring two people so in-step with each other.

"You said you contact told you he was in the basement level?" Ressler asked as they moved down the hall.

Liz nodded. "Yes."

A sound caught both of their attentions and they stopped, frozen in place and tensed for a fight. Liz tilted her head, listening very carefully. "Stay," she instructed and moved forward, her boots silent against the concrete floors. Thankfully Ressler did as she instructed, more or less, and Liz slipped around the corner, finding a guard's back to her. She moved quickly and almost silently, one swift kick to the back of the knee took him to the ground and she wrapped an arm around his neck firmly from behind. He struggled, but she forced him down, the bones finally giving and he slumped to the floor at her feet.

A soft snort came from behind and sure turned to find Ressler hadn't listened quite as well as she thought. He shook his head, but kept any judgements to himself. "We passed a stairwell. It looks like it should lead to the basement."

"Right," she murmured, following him to it. They moved quickly but carefully down the stairs, keeping their footsteps as quiet as they could.

They hit the bottom, the floor feeling more solid under her boots and she turned the corner to find a large, metal door in their path. Ressler didn't stop, but moved immediately to it and pulled it open.

The stairwell emptied out into a large room that was something of a basement. There were dim lights hanging from the ceiling, but no windows to let anything natural in. It was fairly large, open, and off to the corner was a mattress, filthy and thin, with a figure curled on it.

One glance at Ressler told her to go, he would clear the room. Liz inched forward, fear of what she would find creeping through her. He was barefoot, chains locked around either ankle and tethered him to the wall. His jeans were filthy, frayed, and she could see spots of old, dried blood the closer she moved. He was shivering where he lay, curled into himself with only a thin t-shirt to keep the cold off his back. It was amazing, in the dead of summer, how damp and cool they kept this place.

"Jacob?" Liz called quietly, kneeling down. He stirred and she saw the sweat that stood against his ashen skin, his eyes squeezed closed and brows drawn together. She swallowed hard, knowing her voice would give if she didn't. "Jacob? Babe?"

Her fingers touched his hunched shoulder and he came flying up. She barely had time to pull back before he lashed out, but recognition flashed through his fever-bright eyes quickly enough and he slumped back down to the mattress. "Liz?"

Despite the terrible raspy sound of his voice, she felt a smile tug her lips. "I told you I was going to get you out."

"Hey, buddy," Ressler greeted from behind her, drawing Jacob's attention sluggishly. "We're going to get you out of here. If we get these off of you can you stand?"

Liz moved instantly to the chains Ressler was referring, pulling a lock pick set from her jacket pocket and started to work on it.

Jacob have a pained cough. "Yeah. Sure. How long… have I been here?"

"Over a month. I'm sorry, Jake. We've hit every wall."

"They knew 'bout Cape Town. Not sure how."

"Yeah, I can tell they didn't underestimate you."

"Got it," Liz breathed, the locks snapping and she cringed at the painful marks on his bare ankles where the metal had rubbed at them. She shifted back, giving him room to sit slowly with his partner's help, and he reached out to her.

"Love you," he murmured and drew a smile from her as his fingers closed around hers.

"You too," she answered and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips. "We're getting you out of here."

He nodded, and together she and Ressler helped him to his feet, an arm slung over each shoulder. He sagged a little against them, and Liz could feel the heat radiating off of him. He needed a hospital.

"Ress, Director knows 'bout Cape Town," Jacob said again.

"Yeah, you said that."

"He's going to use it against you."

"He can try. Right now we have to get you to someplace safe. Then we'll worry about what's coming."

They took the stairs slowly and Liz couldn't help but feel the growing unease at the lack of resistance. "Are there usually so few guards?"

"Not sure," Jacob murmured. "Didn't exactly get the tour."

Liz snorted. "Good to hear you haven't lost your sense of humour."

She glanced up to see him smirking. "Helps to be on my way out."

They hit the main level and all three of them froze, sirens sounding In the distance. "Be right back," Liz promised and slipped out from under her husband's arm to go to the small window in the stairwell. Police cars, federal issued SUVs, ambulances, and more were pulling up. "Did you call the cavalry?" she asked Ressler.

"No. It was just us and Meera if she made it."

"Everyone within a hundred mile radius showed up instead," Liz grumbled.

"Do you have what we need to clear her?" Jacob asked and Ressler frowned.

"Yeah, but if Kotsiopulos somehow got wind that we were coming for you, this may be a set up. I wouldn't trust anyone I don't know to take her in."

"I can't get around all of them," Liz admitted. "I'm good, but not _that_ good."

"I'll be fine," Jacob said firmly. "Protect her, Ress. Please? You know I'd do it for Audrey."

"I know you would," his partner breathed. "I'll get you on your way to the hospital and take her to the Post Office myself, okay?"

Liz opened her mouth to argue the plan, but Jacob glared. "Don't. I've had a really sucky month or whatever. Just do this, please? For me?"

She frowned deeply and reached to the side of his face. His skin was so warm and she couldn't risk delaying him any longer. "I don't like it. What if they try to shut you up on the way there?"

"I'm a big boy," he chuckled and wormed himself free on Ressler's grasp so he could face her. He stood there, somewhat steady, and leaned in so that their foreheads touched. "If I lose you none of this was worth it, Liz. If it's you or me, I choose you. You can't sway me on that."

Liz swallowed hard, trying to push down the surging emotions that threatened to drown her. She blinked back the tears and her fingers moved down to the back of his neck, pulling him into a kiss. He fell into it, his hands working their way to the side of her face and into her dyed hair. "I love you," she managed as they broke. "I love you more than anything they could threaten me with. I don't want to do this without you, Jacob."

He kissed her forehead. "You won't," he promised. "You won't."

"Guys, I hate to break this up, but if we're going to do this now's the time," Ressler said from his place.

Liz nodded and Jacob reached to wipe at her tears. She caught his hand and pressed a kiss to his palm. "Love you," she said again.

"We're both going home soon," he told her firmly.

"Together," she agreed. It would have to be the promise she clung to.

Doors crashed open without warning and guns were aimed. Liz raised her hands immediately. "You're late to the party, boys. Ressler here beat you to the punch."

"I've got her," Ressler assured them, flashing his badge. "Agent Phelps here needs medical attention."

Everything moved in a sort of haze for Elizabeth Phelps. She didn't leave Ressler's and Jacob's side until the stepped out of the warehouse and Harold Cooper met them. He didn't look happy. "I just barely got notice that you found him," he stated to Ressler. "Good to see you alive, Agent Phelps. I'll take Liz to the Post Office and she'll be held there until the trial."

"I'll be right behind you, Liz," Jacob said.

"Uh huh. Because they'll just release you with a clean bill of health like that," Ressler grumbled. "I'll have my cell on me. Come on, Jake."

Liz didn't get a chance to kiss him goodbye as they cuffed her and the Assistant Director led her away. "You'll tell me when you hear something from them, won't you?" she asked softly.

Cooper grimaced. "I'll do my best," he promised. "Watch your head."

She ducked into the back of his SUV and she watched through the darkened window as the medics surrounded her husband and moved him towards the ambulance.

* * *

Ressler refused to be left behind when they got Jacob into the ambulance. Is partner was fading quickly and Cooper had control of the Liz side of things. Jacob needed him there.

He sat as out of the way as possible, hearing bits of information thrown around, but as nothing was directed at him, he knew he wasn't getting the full picture. It was everything he could do not to fight them on it when they got to the hospital and he was told to wait outside. He filled the time by getting updates from the Post Office. They had gotten Liz there safely, but Kotsiopulos was already pacing at their door. Reven Write was helpful in keeping him from taking her outright, but he had a National Security Advisor on his side, and apparently this Hitchin woman was pushing to have Liz delivered into the CIA's custody. The fight was raging and Ressler knew he should be there, but he wasn't any closer to finding out about Jake than he was when they had gotten there.

Ressler had just stood to go speak with the woman at the reception desk when the doors opened and a doctor in scrubs came through. "Agent Ressler?"

"Yes," he answered eagerly.

The doctor wore a grim look, but that could mean half a dozen different things. "Agent Phelps has you listed as his secondary medical contact. Is his wife not here with you?"

"She can't be here," Ressler answered stiffly. "I'm his partner. I can let her know what's going on."

The doctor nodded. "Your partner's lucky to have gotten here. I understand you're the one that came in with him? His injuries range from minor to severe. Multiple fractures, lacerations, what appears to be a deep wound from a knife that hasn't healed properly. He's fighting an infection from that and we'll need to get it under control."

"He's going to be okay, though?" Ressler pressed.

The doctor pulled in a breath and the agent was certain a complicated answer was not a good one.

"Dr Beckmann, please report to the ER," a voice chimed over the intercom and the doctor looked back before hastily excusing himself.

Something about his expression didn't set well with Ressler, and on impulse he followed back through the doors. The staff was so focused on the emergency at hand they didn't notice him.

Medical equipment was screaming and he heard shouts as they filtered into his partner's room. He stood outside the large window, watching as they tried to revive him. He watched them work, Jacob lying still against the sheets, and finally he sucked in a gasping breath, his eyes popping open if only for a moment before fluttering closed again.

"Sir?" a nurse asked, catching Ressler's attention. "You really shouldn't be back here."

Ressler bristled at her tone. "That's my partner. What's going on?"

"Agent Ressler, Agent Phelps is back with us," Dr Beckmann said as he exited the room and motioned for the agent to move to the side. "I don't presume to know exactly what situation you and your partner have found yourselves in, but it's clear that someone was determined to do him a lot of harm. I might… suggest trusted security at his room."

He didn't like the sound of it, almost as if the doctor thought that it was strange that Jacob would suddenly crash out. Like there had been someone in there that shouldn't have been. "I'll make sure that happens. Until we can get it organized, I'm not leaving."

"Understood. We have him sedated, but not so heavily it will keep him out. He could come back around at any time."

"Thanks." Ressler moved in slowly, his gaze on his friend who was so pale against the sheets, dark circles around his eyes, likely from both beatings and sleep deprivation. He had been so focused on getting Jacob out of there before he hadn't taken the time to really look at him, but in that moment he couldn't tear his gaze away. Signs of fever showed in the flushed look to his pallid skin. New and old cuts and bruises could be seen on his face and even peeking out from the collar of his hospital gown. His left hand was bandaged, and it looked like at least fingers were broken, but there might have been damage done all the way up past his wrist with the way they had it wrapped. His mind ran wild with possibilities and he cringed at the thought of what all they had put him through with the time that they had had to do it in.

Jacob's eyes slid very slowly open, staring blankly for a moment as if he were trying to work his way through the fog the drugs likely had his mind in. He blinked hard and shifted his gaze over to Ressler. "Hey," he greeted raspily, grimacing even as he did.

"Hey. How're you feeling?"

"Hurts," he answered honestly. "Everything."

"I bet so. We just about lost you, Jake."

"Sorry."

Ressler snorted. "You should be," he grumbled, and it drew a tired smile from the younger man.

Jacob shifted, grimacing as he did. "How's Liz?"

"Cooper took her in. She's safe. They won't let anything happen to her, I swear."

"We know anything yet?"

"Not much, but they'll set up a trial. She'll get a fair hearing."

"I need to be there for it. I need-"

"You need rest," Beckmann said sternly from where he had been looking over Jacob's charts. "You're in a lot of trouble if we don't get that infection under control. You may need surgery for the internal damage the knife injury caused, but we have to let the antibiotics do their job first. That's not even bothering with the other damage done." He looked at the file. "Recent concussion, lacerations, multiple fractures… You couldn't walk out of here if you wanted to, Mr Phelps. That right leg of yours would never hold your weight, even if that were all that was wrong." He leveled a look that said he wouldn't be fooled by Jacob as the injured man opened his mouth. "And we just had to shock you back. I think that gives you a pass to rest ."

"He doesn't understand that word," Ressler grumbled and gave the doctor a slightly pleading look. "Give us a second?" he asked, and as soon as the staff had cleared out he turned his attention to his friend. "Jake-"

"I don't need a lecture, Ress. I just went through hell to keep her safe. I'll be damned if-"

"And we just risked our lives to get you back, you selfish idiot," Ressler snapped. "I get that you want to protect her, but at some point you have to realize you've done everything you can. Killing yourself isn't going to help her. It won't keep her safe."

"If it were Audrey, what would you do?" Jacob demanded, and the machines he was hooked up to started beeping a little quicker, the first stage of warnings going off. He was in too bad of shape to get this riled up, and Ressler was more than a little worried about the damage that could cause. He'd nearly lost him. Several times, and far too recently.

Ressler loosed a breath, shaking his head. "Whatever it took," he admitted softly, "but I'd hope you'd be right there to make sure I was there for her when the dust settled. To keep me from being a complete idiot."

Jacob opened his mouth as if to argue, but a frustrated huff left him instead and he sank back into his pillows. "I'm going to personally break Solomon's neck," he swore, and there was nothing in his tone that made Ressler question his resolve.

"Is that who took you? If you're up to it, I need to know. If it can help prove the Cabal-"

"Kotsiopulos," Jacob interrupted, shifting in the bed and suddenly more alert again. "He came by. Gloating."

"We're going to put a protective detail on the room. I don't want to hear one complaint about it either."

"I'm not the one that needs protection. Ress-"

"You can place him there. Yeah, Jake, you do."

He watched his partner frown deeply. "Did we get Karakurt?"

"Yeah, we have him."

"Good," Jacob breathed, looking very tired suddenly. "That's a start."

"It's more than a start, buddy. We're going to get there. One step at a time. Get some sleep, huh?"

Jacob gave a faint nod, but it looked like whatever drugs they had pushing through his system were starting to kick in. Ressler waited until dark blue eyes slipped closed before pulling his phone out to start seeing who they still trusted that could be pulled from the Post Office for a protective detail at the hospital.

* * *

The Post Office had a leak and this was not the time to be taping up holes and hoping they stayed plugged. Reddington was fond of Meera, he was, but she was the only one that could have released the information shy of Ressler and Cooper, and as irritated as Red was at Donald for encouraging Elizabeth on her decision to go after her husband, the man wouldn't have put his partner in danger by bringing Cabal operatives in to arrest Liz. He would have done it himself. Cooper was the one that had called and warned Red, and told him that he would make sure Liz remained safe.

Three days, Reddington had told the assistant director. He needed three full days until she would be taken to trial. He could make his plan work as long as nothing got in the way. Nothing could. Elizabeth's life depended on it.

That was why he sat in Meera Malik's home, gun drawn, and waiting for her to walk in. He couldn't risk a mole.

The door opened and Meera entered her home, dark eyes narrowing. She didn't pause more than a beat, but closed the door behind her and leveled a hard look. "If you're going to kill me, do it now, because I've had a hell of a day and if you give me half a chance to keep my children from being orphans I _will_ take it."

The threat gave him pause and Reddington's gaze drifted to her disheveled appearance, the dirt mixed with blood on her clothes, and the makeup smudged as if a woman that he was half certain never cried had been doing just that. He lowered the weapon a little. "You have one chance to explain why you handed over the information that led to Elizabeth Phelps' capture."

Meera pulled in a breath. "Solomon was here. He killed David with my gun and threatened my children."

Red was adept at telling a lie even off of the most skilled tongues, and she wasn't lying. He finally lowered the gun all the way. "And now?"

"They have me by the neck. I've spent the last hours pulling a bullet out of my dead ex husband and dropping his body off some place that won't be connected to me. I know these people. They have the board rigged for it. If it were just me-"

"The things we do for our children," Reddington breathed.

Meera looked at him. "Is she-?"

"Safe as she can be, given the circumstances," he answered, though perhaps not the question she intended. "Your children will be as well. I'll have someone go with you to pick them up and put you all somewhere safe until this has blown over. Cooper will understand."

"I'm surprised you want me to go with them," she said skeptically.

"I can't trust you now that you've been compromise. Had you it up for any other reason… I can't fault you for protecting your children."

She nodded slowly. "For what it's worth, I am sorry, and I hope Liz is safe. Did Ressler at least get Phelps out?"

"He did."

A small flash of relief flickered across her expression. "How is he?"

"Not well, from what I hear, but he'll need to be shortly. Stay here. Don't leave. I'll have one of my people by in an hour to collect you and your children and take you to a safehouse."

Meera gave a short nod and Red stood, turning to leave. He had one more stop to make and the sun was already in the sky, cutting into the hours of his first day.

* * *

He woke with a start, still fighting the demon of a man in his dreams and Liz's name in his lips. Instead of Solomon looming over him he found Raymond Reddington, and he wasn't sure that was a lot better. Jacob opened his mouth to speak, but a hacking cough was all that he managed.

Reddington leaned over and pulled a glass of water from the bedside table, moving it close enough that Jacob could manage a couple of painful swallows through the straw. "My, you do look rather worse for wear," he mused.

The injured man managed another cough before trying again. "The task force has Liz, not the Cabal."

"Don't be foolish, Jacob. You know there's little difference. You're already down one teammate and they'll pick the others off just the same. You as well, I'd wager. Was that supposed to be a guard at your door to keep them out?"

Jacob grimaced. "I hope you have a plan."

"I do. Pieces of one that are coming together. Getting you back alive is helpful. If there must be a trial, I need you to tell them everything you saw. Solomon. Anything else."

"Kotsiopulos was there."

Reddington quirked an eyebrow. "You have three days to be well enough on your feet to get to the courtroom. Can you do that?"

"For Liz? Yeah. I can do that."

The older man nodded. "I'll have Cooper recall his man. He's pointless. Baz will make sure that the Cabal doesn't put a pillow over your face."

"I don't need-"

"As much as I am loath to admit it, Agent Phelps, I need you alive for this. We must dismantle them, discredit them. To do that, you must _survive_ long enough to testify in open court."

Jacob blinked sluggishly. "Red?"

"What?" Reddington all but grumbled.

"We're going to see this through. I won't let her go now. Not after everything."

Thin lips twitched downward and he shook his head. "I never would have thought you so damn loyal all those years ago."

"You should never underestimate me."

The frown straightened out before finally curling up just a little. "Never again. Three days. Elizabeth will be free in one form or another, but she will be alive and she _will_ be free."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Just curious, is there a better day for you guys for me to post during the week/weekends? I feel like reviews have sort of dropped off and I'm not sure if readership has or not, so I just want to make sure that I'm putting it up at a convenient time for everyone :)

Next time - Elizabeth Phelps is taken to trial and the pieces come together.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter Forty-Four**

The sound of footsteps woke her and Elizabeth Phelps sat up on the cot slowly, blue eyes scanning the room to find Donald Ressler moving past a guard. She swung her legs around to stand and met him at the glass. "How's Jacob?"

"Better each day," Ressler answered, "but the doctors aren't ready to release him and the hearing can't be pushed back. Kotsiopulos has been quietly pushing to take you into CIA custody. He'll win the battle if we put it off any longer."

"And Red?"

Her husband's partner shot her a look. "We haven't been in contact," he lied for the cameras. "Listen, you're going to get a fair trial. We're going to make sure of that. Just… be honest."

"I'll do my best."

She saw Ressler snort more than heard it through the glass, but as soon as he gave the signal the box began to open. Guns were trained on her from ever angle as Liz stepped out of the box, wrists out for the cuffs. They had already fitted her with another tracking chip, but now they were placing a heavy bulletproof vest over her head as well.

"Just precautionary," Ressler assured her. "I promised my partner I'd keep you safe."

Liz offered him a thin smile. "I still can't talk to him?"

"I've done everything I can for that," Ressler promised and leaned in slightly, speaking very quietly. "Reddington has a plan. We have Karakurt."

Liz looked at him a little wide-eyed. Karakurt could blow the Cabal out of the water. She knew they ad been looking for him, but not that they had found him. They had a chance now. With the rumours flying through the papers, Kotsiopulos had been on the defensive. She could tell her side of the story, Karakurt would be forced to confess to the bombing and -

The doors to the lift opened before they got there and Kotsiopulos strode in with a woman that Liz was fairly certain was named Hitchin with him. "That's far enough, Agent Ressler. We'll be taking Ms Rostova into custody."

"She's due to a hearing in two hours. She's not going anywhere with you."

"I'm afraid it's a matter of national security," Hitchin assured him.

"And I'm afraid you're not taking her," Cooper said from behind. The tall man strode forward, a determined and angry look on his face. Liz wasn't sure why, but something had made this more personal for him than his agent's wife being ripped apart by the Cabal. It radiated off of him in a dangerous fashion.

Hitchin opened her mouth to argue, but Reven Wright was making her way down the stairs. "Beat you to it, Laurel. Ms Rostova has a hearing today that she _will_ be at. I've set up precautions. Director Kotsiopulos, with the scrutiny you're under, should you even be here?"

The grey haired man bristled a little and Liz did her best to hide her own smug smile. She didn't think it would do them any good at this point.

Kotsiopulos snorted and leaned in. "You think you've won, do you?"

"I think that soon you won't be able to hurt the people I care about."

"Your game can only last so long. We know who you are and we know what you're capable of. If these people you care so much for are hurt, that is your doing and not mine."

Liz felt her temper rise and she jerked forward just a little, but Ressler held her in place. "He's safe from you and I'd rather die than let you hurt him again."

"Well, these things do happen."

"Enough," Cooper snapped. "Director Kotsiopulos, you will remain here until they're gone. If your men follow them you will be in violation of orders. Agent Ressler?"

Ressler nodded and led her into the lift, the guards standing with them. She closed her eyes, feeling it jolt. "You have someone with Jacob, right?"

"Against his will, but yeah."

She pursed her lips. "Keep him safe."

"Doing my best."

"I know."

He loosed a breath, drawing her attention. "He'll be happy to see you after all of this is over."

Liz closed her eyes, unable to respond, her husband's face coming to mind with such force that all she wanted to do was reach out and touch him. She missed him. Badly. It was so strange that before she met him she had been so certain that her childhood dreams of a family were gone, but then he had changed everything. He had made her want it again, and even when he had discovered who she was, Jacob had accepted that. He was her family, and in the end, as long as he was safe, that's what counted in her mind.

* * *

"I feel like I should reiterate that this is a terrible idea," Dr Beckmann said for what may have been the fifth time in the hour.

Jacob offered him a glare. "I signed your papers. It's not your fault if anything goes wrong."

The doctor frowned deeply. "At least let me call Agent Ressler and have him pick you up."

He knew what the doctor was hoping to accomplish. Ress had been so busy with the preparations for the trial that he had barely had a chance to drop by. Beckmann was hoping that he would be able to talk Jacob out of checking himself out against orders. "Ressler has his hands full. I have a ride."

Baz lingered at the door, looking slightly impatient. Jacob couldn't blame him. They were cutting it close as it was and he couldn't move very fast.

Beckmann sighed. "I have the prescription for the antibiotics written up for you, as well as painkillers to help manage the pain. You need to stay off that knee. I would suggest a wheelchair-" he purposefully ignored the look Jacob shot him - "because crutches will aggravate other injuries."

"It's fine. I've got it." Jacob eased himself off the bed, keeping his weight off of his injured right knee to the best of his ability. The brace that he had on it helped the leg hold some of his weight, but as he took his first step he felt himself tilt dangerously and was kept upright by Baz's quick reflexes. When the other man had moved into the room, Jacob wasn't sure, but he had a precise and careful hold on him to make sure he didn't clamp down on one of his injuries. "Thanks."

"This is what I meant," the doctor grumbled.

"And I may be back in twenty-four hours, but there's somewhere I need to be," Jacob snapped.

"If we're going, it needs to be now," Baz murmured.

Jacob gave a firm nod and Beckmann didn't argue again. He moved as quickly as he was able to, leaning heavily on Baz by the time they made it to the car waiting outside of the hospital. Reddington sat in the back, watching what appeared to be the news on a tablet.

"Wouldn't have thought you even knew how to use one of those," Jacob managed, every couple of words half lost to his uneven breathing.

Reddington snorted. "All eyes are on the arrival of Agent Navabi with Karakurt. We'll slip you in the back and Kotsiopulos will be none the wiser until you're called to the stand."

"Ress know I'm coming?"

"Goodness no. We need him with Elizabeth."

Jacob gave a slow nod. "Yeah."

"Harold will be there to get you in. Will you be able to walk-"

"I'm fine."

"Well that's hardly true."

"I'm okay enough to get this done. I have to be."

Reddington gave a small sigh from his place, drawing Jacob's attention. He looked more worn than the younger man had noticed when he had first taken a seat. "Have you told her?" he asked quietly, the question slipping from him. "About who you really are to her?"

The man that had been his enemy for so long looked a little startled. "I'm not sure exactly what you're trying to get at, Agent Phelps."

"Yeah you do. She deserves to know after everything."

"Let's take this one step at a time, shall we? First, getting out the door and up to the courthouse."

Jacob realized they had stopped and were idling outside the courthouse. Just as Reddington had predicted the back entrance was completely deserted. The door opened and he saw Cooper standing and waiting for him.

"I have a meeting with someone that can end all of this. Don't let them kill you before you have your say."

The agent gave a half smirk. "I'll do my best." He opened the car door and managed to stay upright as he made it the short walk across the sidewalk to the stairs, gripping the railing all the way up.

"You look like hell," Cooper said when he finally made it. "I can't believe your doctor let you go for this."

"He didn't. I signed the papers and left," Jacob managed, hand going to his side that was starting to ache deeply without the painkillers that they had given him in the hospital.

His boss sighed and shook his head, but didn't argue. "Come on. We'll need to get settled before anything else decides to break loose."

"Where is Liz?"

"Ressler is overseeing her security personally. He'll escort her up to the courtroom."

Jacob nodded slowly. He had hoped to be able to see both of them before the trial. Ressler was going to be pissed he had come, and he would rather have a chance to explain himself rather than his partner - his _friend_ that had just risked his life and career to make sure he could escape the Cabal - seeing him sitting and waiting to be called to the stand. Ressler deserved that much and more, but it looked like he wouldn't get it.

"Agent Phelps?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you alright?"

Jacob chuckled. "My wife is about to stand trial for treason and I've just come off of over a month of torture. No, but that doesn't really matter."

Cooper grimaced and opened the door for him to limp into the courtroom. It was large and empty save for a few guards, but when Cooper flashed his credentials they let them take a seat. Jacob sank down hard, feeling his limited energy already spent. He was there by sheer willpower alone and that was alright. He was stubborn enough to get through this. He wouldn't let the Cabal win.

* * *

"I don't know who you think you are, but you can't just-"

Raymond Reddington strode past the blubbering secretary and into Laurel Hitchin's office. The woman looked up from where she had been gathering paperwork. "You have some nerve walking in here."

"Going somewhere, Laurel, or making preparations to deal with Peter once all is said and done?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Of course you don't. You also aren't nervous as hell over the fact that Karakurt has been delivered to testify. To add to that, Agent Phelps has also been delivered to the courtroom and has quite a story to tell, and, oh yes, your people had Meera Malik's ex husband murdered and now that her children are out of harm's way I should probably tell you that's a woman you do _not_ want to anger. CIA trained, you know. I assure you that the precautions that were taking to keep your little double agent on her leash have been dealt with. The cards are stacked in our favour."

The woman bristled. "And why warn me, Reddington?"

He gave her a broad smile. "Because you're going to exonerate Elizabeth Phelps."

Hitchin snorted. "Am I?"

"Drop all charges against her, announce that Tom Connolly was, in fact, a member of the Cabal that has been broadcast over every news station for the last month and a half. Agent Jacob Phelps was kidnapped and held hostage by Matias Solomon on Peter Kotsiopulos' orders. These are all things that will come out today, Laurel. The question is: will you sink to the bottom with them or will you use their downfall as a means for your own escape?"

She watched him warily, her gaze shifting over to the television screen that was silently playing Karakurt's arrival at the courthouse. There were too many players for Hitchin to have predicted them all and Reddington knew it. She was backed into a corner and slowly her resolve began to melt. "We would appreciate, if we do this for you, that you handle the Peter problem for us."

A smirk touched his lips. "With pleasure."

"I have to make a few phone calls. We had… Precautions set up. I'll be able to stop them."

"You better. If any harm comes to Elizabeth I will make sure that your buried along with the Director. Am I clear?"

"Crystal," she answered tightly and picked up her phone.

* * *

"They're ready for her."

Ressler looked around to where the marshall was motioning and then back to where Elizabeth Phelps was standing from the bench behind the bars. Her expression was unreadable, steady and passive so that it gave nothing away. It was strange, even with everything, to see his best friend's wife in that light. He had seen her murder a man, but there was something chilling about her now.

Liz's gaze flickered to meet his and for half a moment the mask cracked and he saw the fear she was hiding so well. "No reason to wait," she murmured.

"No," he answered quietly and stepped back, letting them unlock the cell and fit her in the cuffs. Once they had her fitted he reached out. "I've got her."

"Sir, we're supposed to-"

"I've got her," Ressler repeated sternly and the man finally backed off. There was something unsettling in the way that he was looking at her though, and he had just gotten turned to escort her upstairs when every sense he had went on high alert.

Ressler spun in time to see the gun coming up and he shoved Liz to the side hard, following and reaching for his own weapon. The shot barely missed them and he swung around and fired. The Marshall stumbled back with a yelp, the bullet having clipped him, and Ressler stood straight to raise his gun, positioning himself between their attacker and Liz. "Drop it," he growled and the man complied immediately.

"Thanks," Liz managed and he risked a glance back only when the sound of footsteps coming around the corner could be heard. Liz stiffened beside him and he took a half step closer.

"I promised Jake I'd keep you safe."

"Don't get yourself killed doing it. He'll never forgive you."

Ressler smirked for the brief moment before several men in uniform came around and he flashed his badge. "Special Agent Donald Ressler. I'm her escort up to the court. We were attacked by this man." He motioned to the bleeding marshall.

"We just received word that there was a man that was after her. Do you need an escort up?"

"No, I think we have it," Ressler answered and started Liz forward before anyone could argue. He didn't dare trust them, no matter what they had said. He had made a promise to his partner and he would be damned if he didn't live up to it. Jacob had trusted him with this.

They entered the courtroom from the side entrance and found the room mostly empty. The judge wasn't there yet and only a few guards stood around, but over to the side sat Harold Cooper, Reven Wright, Samar, and a very miserable looking Jacob Phelps who perked just a little as they entered.

"Jacob," Liz breathed and started towards him as he stood.

"Hey, you can't," Ressler said lowly. "Take a seat. The judge should be here soon."

"I just want to-"

"Liz, just do it, would you? Cooper brought him in as a witness. You can't talk to him."

That didn't mean _he_ couldn't though. Ressler waited until she was seated and a marshall came to stand with her - he hoped no one was stupid enough to try anything with so many people ready and willing to fight back in the room - before he moved towards his friend. Jacob was standing slowly, his movements stiff and he looked ill, but he was on his feet and as Ressler drew close enough to get a good look at his eyes, he was sure the idiot had chosen not to take the pain medication that morning.

"Ress, hey, I need to-"

"Sit down, you idiot, before you fall down" Ressler growled. "Why are you here? How stupid are you?"

"She needs me here."

"Sounds like Reddington talking to me. You get that he doesn't give a damn what happens to you, right? You could drop dead, and as long as you help exonerate her before you do it he won't care. He'd say anything to get you here."

"I know where Reddington's priorities lie, Ress. I'm not stupid. Mine just happen to line up with his right now."

Ressler felt some of the anger subside with the sincerity that was so rarely open in his friend's voice. If it was the worry, the exhaustion, the pain, or a compilation of all of the above he didn't know, but he offered him a strained smile. "I know, Jake," he answered him softly. "Just sit. We'll get her through this."

"I know you've watched out for her. Thank you."

"You'd have done the same."

Jacob nodded stiffly and held onto one of the chairs as he turned. Ressler watched him limp back to his place, careful not to put too much lingering weight on the knee that the doctor had said was so torn up after everything. He was wearing a brace over his jeans, giving it some support at least. Ressler shook his head, grumbling about the stubborn idiot as he started to follow. For all he knew they might not even let him stay for the preceding.

As he approached the others, he saw them bent over a phone. "What's happening?"

"Laurel Hitchin just called an emergency press conference," Wright said.

Ressler leaned in, trying to hear the speech from the woman that he was certain had helped make their lives hell. "... and the tireless efforts of a team led by Assistant Director Harold Cooper, we have uncovered the existence of a clandestine organization known to some as the Cabal. We are still uncertain how deep this organization reaches, but two lead members that have been connected to it are the late Attorney General Thomas Connolly and Director of Clandestine Services Peter Kotsiopulos. We will not be taking questions at this time, but the US government would like to extend a formal apology to Elizabeth Phelps and her family for the events that have occurred over the course of the past few weeks..."

Ressler glanced over to Jacob who looked ready to pass out from relief. He started to stand from his place, likely to try to go to his wife again, but Ressler reached out. "Hey, there'll be time. Let's not try our luck."

He nodded slowly, meeting her eyes across the courtroom. Now it was a waiting game.

* * *

"Hello Peter."

There was something about waiting for someone inside their own home that threw them. Perhaps it was the invasion of personal space or the knowledge that there was no place safe to hide that did it. Whatever the case, Raymond Reddington had no issue using it to his advantage.

Kotsiopulos turned at the sound of his voice and stiffened. He wore the expression of a man that knew he had nowhere to go and no one to save him. Red flashed him a smile that would have torn away any lingering hope. "Hello, Peter," he greeted again when he received no verbal acknowledgement.

"You worked out a deal."

"It _is_ what I'm known for." He raised his gun, motioning for Kotsiopulos to take a seat. The other man moved slowly to the sofa as Red continued to speak. "You and I have been at this dance for some time now. There have been wins and losses in both sides, but you crossed a line when you went after Elizabeth Phelps. One that I can't forgive." He watched him, the other man silent as if he thought it might save him.

Reddington leaned in, gun aimed at the Director's chest. "There are many sins that you have to pay for, Peter. Many wrongs that you will never have the chance to right, even if you would care to. Did you give your man Solomon specific instructions on killing Agent Malik's ex husband or did you leave that up to his own creativity? The woman came home to find the father of her children sat up on her couch, a bullet through his chest from her personal firearm. I want you to consider that a moment before the end."

Kotsiopulos pulled in a deep breath, resignation flickering through his eyes. "Kill me or don't, Reddington, but _she_ still knows. The world knows. Elizabeth Phelps is Masha Rostova. After everything, you couldn't hide her away from that, no matter how hard you tried. Katarina will come for-"

The shot rang out in the large, otherwise empty house and Kotsiopulos never got the chance to finish what he was saying as the life slid from his eyes.

Reddington frowned deeply. "But you won't be alive to see the fallout," he told the dead man before holstering his weapon and taking up his hat that he had left on the table. He fit it snugly down on his head, pulling it at the brim, and left Mr Kaplan and her employees to their work.

* * *

They had come through. Not just Reddington, but the entire team, and as Liz sat waiting for the final paperwork to be pushed through for her release, that realization left her with a feeling that she wasn't used to outside of her own home with her husband. Belonging. For the first time since everything had come out in the open and she had begun working with the task force, she felt as if she might actually belong with them, and not just because of Jacob. She knew that they had done this, in part, for him, but they had worked hard to get her her freedom back. Somewhere along the way she had become part of their team and she saw exactly what that meant now.

The guard came and let her out, had her sign her paperwork, and handed her anything that had been stored there, which wasn't much. Liz dressed quickly and walked out the door of the holding area, pulling in a breath of fresh air.

"Hey, babe."

Liz turned, finding a very familiar figure leaned against the wall as if he were just waiting for her there. "What are you doing here? I thought Don dragged your right back to the hospital? He _should_ have."

"He tried. I refused." Jacob flashed her what looked like a tired smile as he pushed himself off of the wall, his weight leaned to his left and she noticed the brace fit over his jeans to keep his knee steady. She looked him up and down, knowing most of his injuries were hidden by clothes and bandages beneath those, but there was no mistaking the joy in his tired eyes as he reached out to her and pulled her close, crushing her to him as if it were worth all the pain the world.

She leaned in, her arms wrapped around him and her face buried in his chest. She felt his fingers tangling in her hair in the motion that always soothed her and before she knew it tears were streaming down her face. "I thought I might not see you again," she confessed. "I was… I love you. I love you."

"I love you too," he murmured and kissed the side of her head. "You're safe now. We're safe."

They stayed there like that for a long moment until she felt him sag a little and Liz stepped back, her hand going to his face. He leaned into her touch and she was pleased that his skin felt cool to the touch. "Let's get a cab back to the hospital."

"I just want to go home, babe. With you. I promise I _did_ actually talk to the doctor before leaving. I have all the meds I need and I'm going back in in a couple of days for a follow up."

"You better," she grumbled, tipping up on her toes to press a quick kiss against his lips. "I didn't just get you back to lose you again."

He gave her one of his lopsided smiles, but then his gaze flickered back behind her. She turned, finding Raymond Reddington standing on the other side of the street next to a parked car that hadn't been there when she came out. He looked almost hesitant as he straightened, watching them carefully, and suddenly very aware that they had seen him. Finally she bit her lip and glanced back at Jacob. "How pissed at me is he for ditching him to save you?"

"Well, he didn't send someone to smother me with a pillow as payback, so I guess not too bad."

Liz snorted a laugh and rolled her eyes. "Will you be okay for a second?"

"I'm not going anywhere without you," he promise.

She tried for a smile. Well, time to face the music, she supposed as she started across the street. Reddington remained where he was, his expression guarded, but there was something just behind the mask of calm that reminded her of waters so deep that she couldn't see the bottom. The closer she got, the more she could almost feel it rolling off of him, and it took her a moment to realize that it was relief. "Lizzie," he breathed.

"Listen, about slipping away-"

"That doesn't matter," he cut in. "You're free and you're safe. That is what matters."

She looked up at him, not quite sure how she should react to the words. "Why? Why am I so important to you?"

"Because all of this… your life…. You deserved better, Lizzie. You deserved so much better than what you've been put through."

"But why is it so important to _you_?" she stressed, not letting him squirm away from it.

His smile was sad. "Because in the end I blame myself," he answered softly. "Come on, now. I'll give you and your husband a ride home. You both could likely do with some rest."

He started to turn and on impulse Liz reached out, catching him, and he pulled her into a hug. It wasn't nearly as awkward as it should have been and she held on tight for a long moment. She felt safe there. "Red?" she asked as he finally released her, finding her voice a little unsteady.

"Yes, Lizzie?" he murmured motioning to Jacob behind her.

"I know you said you're not my father, but… I'm going to find out who you are and whatever happened, whatever you blame yourself for…. I'm going to forgive you."

He look struck by the words and he offered her a very hesitant smile. "Some things can't be forgiven, Elizabeth, but if you do, I hope you're right. Now, into the car, both of you, before your husband passes out and we spend the rest of the very short evening in a hospital waiting room. Those stiff-backed chairs and the nurses after midnight that…."

Liz found herself laughing quietly as she piled into the back and scooted in, Reddington still speaking as he circled around the car and into the other side. Jacob sat heavily next to her and she leaned into him, her hand finding his and she smiled as Red continued on. She would forgive him for whatever he thought he had done against her, she promised herself, because there was something about him she couldn't shake. He was infuriating and the man wouldn't know what personal boundaries were if his life depended on it, but she could count the number of people that had been there for her on just a few fingers, and Raymond Reddington had made it onto that short list of those she trusted. For that, after everything they had just been through, she couldn't imagine there being something she couldn't forgive.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Okay, there is one more major arc to go. I'm still writing on it, so I can't really tell you how long it'll be because a lot is going to happen. I came very close to ending the story here, but then I couldn't bring myself to do it. There are too many loose ends and I would have been bypassing pieces that everyone has to pick up now from everything that's happened. Fair warning, the next few chapters may be rough for Jake.

Anyone have a guess what the final arc is about? I'm curious if I've made it blatantly obvious or not. It's always hard to tell when you know how things are going to end lol

Next Time - As the dust settles from the Cabal fiasco, not everything is fitting perfectly back into place.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter Fort-Five**

He woke with a start, the last of the nightmare clawing at him so hard that he thought he might find blood in its wake. It wasn't that Jacob wasn't accustomed to waking up to nightmares, but these had gotten progressively worse the further away from the event that he got. They left him with only a handful of hours of sleep each week and a full time job of covering that up.

"Hey," Liz murmured from his side, reaching out for him so that her fingers latched onto his sweatshirt he was sleeping in and held on tight, tugging him closer in the bed.

Jacob let his wife pull him closer, her arms going around his middle and he melted into her touch. It was the only relief he had found in the three months since they had returned home. He was exhausted, but his mind wouldn't rest.

"Another dream?"

"Yeah."

"You weren't honest with the shrink, were you? The one that cleared you for duty?"

Jacob snorted and pressed a kiss to his wife's forehead. "They're worthless. You know that."

She gave a short laugh and tightened her hold on him. "I know you need space to figure things out, but I'm here. You do know that, right?"

He nodded slowly. "I know, babe. And I'm fine, really. As soon as Cooper lets me back into the field I'll have all the distraction I need."

"We'll find him, you know. We're looking."

"I know." He sighed, burrowing down and trying to focus on the warmth he felt with her so close. The chill never left him, though. Not entirely, even if it was less with her so near. "I love you."

"I love you too," she answered softly. Very slowly she sat up in bed, her hair - dark again - falling around her. She was watching him closely, as if trying to get a good read on him, before leaning in and kissing him.

Jacob's eyes drifted closed as his wife's hand came to the side of his face, working its way back through his hair, and her fingers ghosted down his neck, his arm, and down across his ribs. He was fine for a long moment until her hand worked its way under his shirt and over the scar left behind from where Solomon had tried to gut him. His entire body tensed and he jerked away hard, effectively ending the moment.

"Jacob? Babe, did I hurt you?"

"I'm fine," he growled, pulling away and rolling out of bed in one stiff motion, any lingering warmth from her touch replaced by a coldness that seemed to work its way deep inside of him these days. It hurt. Not physically, but sometimes it felt close to that too.

"You shouldn't still be in pain like that," Liz murmured, her voice worried. "The doctor said-"

"I _know_ what he said," Jacob snapped and turned to start digging through the chest of drawers.

"You going somewhere?" she asked quietly, her voice flat.

"For a run. I'm sorry, Liz. I just…"

"I know. You want some company?"

"I really just need time to process."

"I told you I'd give you that."

Jacob cringed a little, knowing how hard it was for her not to press him on the subject. "I don't deserve you," he murmured, turning and risking a look at her

Liz had pulled herself from the warm bed and padded across the floor, her arms going carefully around him again. "I love you. All of you. Even your complete inability to let me in sometimes."

"I'm sorry…"

"Don't apologize. I get it."

He managed a smile. "I know you do. Liz, if you need-"

"I'm fine. I'm worried about you."

"Don't. I'm okay. Just need to clear my head from the nightmare and I'll be fine."

"I'm meeting Red for breakfast," she reminded him.

"Right. Not sure I'll be back before you leave."

Liz glanced at the clock. "Your runs are getting longer and longer."

"Got to push it or I'll never get back to normal," he told her with a forced grin. She saw through it, he knew she did, but she let it slide.

"I'm going to go take a shower. Love you. Have a good run."

He nodded and kissed her before shrugging out of his sweatshirt and into his clothes to run. He was lacing his shoes up when the bathroom door opened again, steam pouring out and Liz poked her head out. "You're not going into the office today, are you?"

"No reason to."

"Good. We're putting up the tree this afternoon."

He blinked. "Liz, I-"

"Don't have a choice. Moving back to normal, remember? It's the middle of December and we don't have one decoration up. I'm not doing it alone."

He stopped and turned. "You never had Christmas growing up, did you?"

"Did you before Kelly and Bruce took you in?"

Jacob shook his head slowly. "No," he said quietly. "I'll be here."

She disappeared again and he finished tying his shoes before setting his earbuds in his ears and cranking the music up as high as he could to drown the world out. Jacob took the steps down two at a time, grabbed his keys, and was gone.

The cold air hit him hard, threatening to steal his breath away. He pulled his skullcap down a little lower as he took off down the street, feet hitting the sidewalk in a steady motion as he ran, the world fading around him as he ran a path that had become very familiar in the last few months. He turned and took a shortcut between two buildings, finally stopping when he reached a set of storage units and keyed in the code, letting himself in.

Jacob's breathing was finally starting to even out as he pulled a loose key from his sweatshirt pocket and fit it in, glancing down the hall both ways before opening it and stepped inside. Guilt worked its way in like it had every other time he had come to this place and he pushed it down once more. He wasn't lying to Liz. He'd been for a run. Now he was working.

His gaze swept over the wall covered in pieces of gathered research, photos, and various pieces of information about Matias Solomon. Strings were pinned between pieces of information, linking them, and pads of paper with notes scrawled across them were in the work table. Jacob crossed his arms, taking it in, and shoved at the guilt hard. All knowing would do was worry his wife, and she had been through enough. He had to deal with this alone. If he found him, if he was able to find some closure, then things could really start getting back to normal and maybe he could find some peace.

* * *

"Lizzie," Reddington greeted as she slipped into the seat across from him. He cherished these little get togethers. They had become more and more frequent since their return, and while technically this was a business meeting for Red to provide information on an active case, it allowed him a glimpse into the woman she had become. The one not plagued by terror and violence every second.

"Hey. Sorry I'm late."

"Five minutes hardly counts as late," Red chuckled. He paused, catching the glimpse of hidden worry under her otherwise pleasant demeanor. "What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?" she asked automatically and he frowned.

"Something's troubling you."

She opened her mouth, every sign that a lie was going to tumble from her lips, but then closed it again. The waitress set the tea and breakfast down in front of her that Reddington had ordered and she chewed on a piece of bacon thoughtfully. "It's Jacob," she confessed after a moment. "I'm worried about him. He's not sleeping, he's barely eating. He thinks no one notices and, I guess most haven't."

"But you have."

"He's always had nightmares, but these are worse than usual."

Reddington settled back. Jacob Phelps' mental and emotional health was not something he preferred to weigh in on. The man had plenty of demons, most hidden and stored so deeply below the surface that he himself only seemed to face them head on on his worst days. It was troubling Elizabeth though, and that made it troubling to him. "Your husband has been through quite a bit," he said carefully.

"I know, and he's always processed things differently than most people, but… I guess I just hoped he'd share it with me. He was always so scared before that I was going to catch a glimpse of his darker side and run, but now I think - I _hope_ \- he understands I never would."

They were interestingly matched, Reddington had to admit. It left their possibilities to extremes. They could be each other's greatest support or their own worst enemy. "He's focused on something?"

"I don't know. I think the fact that we still haven't found Solomon is freaking him out."

"Solomon won't come back for him. It would only put him in the FBI's crosshairs."

Elizabeth shrugged. "Logic doesn't alway weigh heavier than fear."

Reddington gave a low chuckle. "No truer words." He noticed her gaze lingering. "You believe if the FBI finds Solomon that he will be… what?"

"I think he can start healing on it," she answered softly. "Cooper won't let him into the field because he _knows_ something is wrong. The shrinks have cleared him, the doctors have cleared him, but-"

"I'll see what I can uncover. For you, Lizzie."

She flashed him a smile. "Thank you. Most of my old contacts are burned."

He nodded. "Of course."

"I just want our life back, you know? We've fought so hard for it. Overcome so much."

"You deserve happiness, Lizzie," Red murmured.

"I told him he needed to help put up Christmas decorations today. We've always had so much fun with that, but I had to guilt him into it. I hate that."

Red tried for a smile. Watching her get flustered over Christmas decorations and mundane things should have left him feeling accomplished, but instead it left him with a problem he wasn't sure he could fix in the end.

Elizabeth pulled in a deep breath. "What are you doing Christmas Day?"

"Excuse me?"

"Christmas Day. Christmas Eve we'll be at Jacob's parents' for dinner, but… You've done a lot for us, Red.

"Are you inviting me to Christmas at the Phelps'?" He almost laughed at the absurdity of it until he realized that Elizabeth was truly struggling for a connection with him. She wasn't certain of who he was to her, but she seemed intent on finding out who he _could_ be, at the very least.

" You're something like family now," she tried to explain awkwardly. "Don't ever tell Jacob I said that. He'll deny it to his dying breath, but even he's a little more fond of you than he was."

Reddington quirked an eyebrow. Well, it didn't take much of a climb to come up from the intense hatred that he had held for him when he was certain that Red had been the responsible party for sidelining him on the job he loved. "I'm sorry, Lizzie, I didn't mean to be flippant. I really don't do Christmas."

"Just think about it. Jacob has this thing, and it does help sometimes: when there's something really bad tied to an event, he'll find something better to replace it with."

Reddington snorted. "Denial. Of course."

"Not exactly."

"You see the best in your husband, Lizzie. You forget that he and I would have shot and killed each other just a few years ago if given the chance. He came close a time or two and blamed me for injuries after that."

She frowned a little. "The invite stands. Come or don't."

Well now he'd done it. "I'll consider it and let you know."

"Thank you. Now, about the case."

And there they had it. Well, he could enjoy his small moments at least.

* * *

Jacob slipped into the townhouse as quietly as he could, cursing himself for losing track of time with his research. Liz was already home, he knew, by the jeep that was parked on the street.

Hudson greeted him at the door, barking as if the entire world needed to know he was home and Liz followed. "Where have you been? I got home and you… Are you _just_ getting back from your run?"

He looked down at his workout clothes. "Yeah. I grabbed a bite to eat while I was out. You wanted to put the tree up, right?"

That seemed to do the trick. Liz brightened up immediately and motioned for him to follow. Their living room looked like Christmas had exploded on it. "What's… all of this?" he managed.

"We're going to decorate. Our lives have been crazy, we've been fighting an insane Cabal and chasing down the last whispers of them, but this place, our home, doesn't have to look like we've been running like crazy. We need a change to get our mind off of it, and decorating for Christmas seemed like the best option."

Jacob couldn't help the small smile her enthusiasm pulled from him. "Yeah? Completely off things?"

"Yep," she answered with a flirtatious look.

He reached for her, pulling her close. "I'm sorry about this morning," he whispered.

She kissed him, but pulled away and wrinkled her nose. "Have you been smoking?"

Jacob cringed. "I might have had one?"

Liz smacked him, the motion mostly playful, as she rolled her eyes. "Shower, brush your teeth before you kiss me again, and then we'll get to work on getting everything up."

He offered her a half smile and darted up the stairs before she could take another swipe at him. A shower and a few hours of work later the Phelps townhouse looked like Christmas. Jacob felt a little less of the cold that had settled its way into him as Liz stepped back, arms crossed over her chest, and inspected their mostly finished handiwork. Hudson, for his part, was still working on the gigantic bone they had bribed him with to stay out of their way.

Jacob's gaze swept across the space from the tree in the corner of the living room to the garland up the banister of the stairs. A wreath hung over the door and a few more were scattered through the house. Apparently Liz had been conspiring with Kelly over this whole affair, because Jacob's mother's advent calendar was hanging in the hallway just outside of the kitchen. He gave a soft chuckle as he took it in and Liz reached for his hand. "I don't want to miss out on anything anymore, Jacob," she murmured, holding his one hand with both of hers. "I want a normal life. You and me. I want to grow old together and we'll have some wild stories, but we'll be alive to tell them." She tipped up on her toes and pressed a kiss to his scruffy cheek. "I want to be happy, Jacob."

"So do I," he answered roughly, turning to face her. "With you. Us."

"Well that's a relief," she teased and wrapped her arms around his neck. He felt her pull him down and into the kiss and he felt himself melt into it, the world around them fading as he picked her up and she laughed in his ear as he carried her over to the couch, which just happened to be the nearest seat to them, and nearly stepped on poor Hudson in the process. Liz choked on her laugh as he stumbled and she half fell from his arms and plopped hard, Jacob stumbling after her so that he landed nearly on top of her. He leaned in, kissing his wife, and her hand moved from the side of his face to the back of his neck, deepening it. When he moved started down, kissing her jaw and then her neck, she stopped him. "Babe? Babe, as much as I hate to say it, we don't have time."

Jacob looked up, confusion echoing in his eyes. "What do you mean? Are we doing something tonight?"

"You are." She gave him a knowing smile. "Besides your runs you've been going to work and coming home. You don't want to do anything, you don't want to go anywhere."

"Lizzie," he breathed, the argument about to leave his tongue when she sat up and kissed him, effectively silencing it.

"I know, but your arguments are wrong. Deal with that. Don should be here soon and you guys are going to go have a guys' night."

"He can wait a little bit longer," he told her suggestively and Liz rolled her eyes, popping him playfully.

"I promised Audrey I'd go over and keep her company. Do you really want to piss off a seven-month pregnant lady?"

Jacob let the meaning of that sink in and he shook his head. "No, I don't think so."

"Smart man," Liz cheered and kissed the tip of his nose as the doorbell rang. "And that would be your partner."

"I didn't hear anything."

She rolled her eyes. "Liar. Get up?"

Slowly and with not just a little show he sluggishly rolled off the couch and onto the floor, shuffling towards the door. He glared at Ressler as he opened it and his partner looked past to where Liz was getting up off the couch. "Sorry, man," he offered. "Liz tell you we're going for drinks? I figured we hadn't done this in a while and after the baby's born I won't have time."

"You still not going to tell me the name of my own godson?"

"Nope. Not until he's born," Ressler answered with a smirk. "Hey, Liz. Christmas time at the Phelps household?"

"Hey, Don," she greeted back with a smirk and a nod. "We thought we'd go all out this year." She turned to Jacob with an expectant look. "We need to get the star up before you go."

"Oh this'll be fun to watch," Ressler chuckled and Jacob shot him a withering look as he followed his wife over to the tree. They may not have gone quite this Christmas-y in years gone by, but they had a bit of a tradition for the star.

Liz hopped up on his back and he caught her, hearing her laugh in his ear and she pressed a kiss to the side of his head before reaching for the top of the tree.

"Thought you had a bad back," his partner teased from across the room.

"Not for her," Jacob answered, his smile turning a little more real. Liz slid down and he grabbed his wallet from the table and clapped Ressler on the shoulder on his way out. "You're getting the first round."

"At no point did I agree to that," his best friend grumbled, following behind and out the door.

* * *

There were days when Donald Ressler lost track of time. Between Audrey's pregnancy and wrapping up the countless loose ends associated with the Cabal, he had barely seen his partner in the last three months, much less had a chance to spend time with him outside of the office.

He had, though, seen quite a bit of Jacob's wife, and she was growing more and more worried as time passed. Now that they were out, he was starting to see why. He didn't look like he had been sleeping well, the dark circles under his eyes pronounced more than usual and Ressler watched him carefully as he went straight for the liquor instead of having a beer with him.

"You look like you want to ask something so you might as well get it out of the way," Jacob grumbled, pulling Ressler back to the present.

The older man pursed his lips together thoughtfully, weighing his words against everything he had come to know about the man next to him in their decade long friendship. "Just haven't seen you a lot lately," he answered, taking a long swig of his beer.

"Missing me?" Jacob popped off with a wink that was all the mask he was hiding behind.

"Yeah, you know how I can't live without your special brand of snark."

That pulled a snort that was something like a laugh from him and Jacob finally met his gaze. Well, that was something at least, and for a brief moment he saw his friend behind the walls that had been so carefully constructed since he had returned home. They fooled most people, but not those closest to him, and at least Jake seemed to know that, even if he was trying to ignore the fact.

"Well if Cooper would just push that paperwork through I'd be right there with you looking for that son of a bitch," he answered with a drink from his own glass.

Ressler grimaced. "I know you would, Jake," he answered softly. "And you're doing a lot from here. And, hey, I'll be around more. Unless all hell breaks loose and she needs my help, Samar is covering any leads too far out of DC. With Audrey only two months away, I'm sticking close to home." He risked a glance over to his friend. "There's something nice about being around family after everything, right?"

"You sound like Liz."

"Maybe your wife is just happy not to be running for her life and that her husband survived the experience. Man, I know you want to get him, and I do too, but-"

"Drop it, Ress," Jacob growled, his voice dangerous and his eyes flashing in a way that would have made anyone else nervous.

Ressler just snorted. "Breathe, Jake. I'm not your enemy and you know that. I'm trying to help you. If this isn't it, fine, let's go to the gym over at the Post Office and go a couple rounds. Would that help?"

"Finding the bastard is what's going to help, Ress. Unless we can do that right now, just drop it."

Ressler sighed deeply and stood. "Fine. Be right back." He needed a moment to get himself together. His friend was drowning, and he'd been so caught up trying to do what he thought would help him that he'd missed it until this point. Liz handled this, but as his partner's wife had told him when she'd asked him to take him out and get his mind off things: she couldn't handle it all. He needed to know that the people that were important to him were there. He would never admit it, she had reminded Ressler, and now the agent wondered if he was doing more harm than good. He and Jake weren't exactly practiced in having chats about feelings.

He leaned against the sink of the restroom, gathering himself. He had known Jacob for a long time, but there were times when he didn't have a clue what to say to help his friend with his inner demons.

The sound of a loud crash outside drew his attention and shouts followed. Ressler darted out to see exactly what he hoped he wouldn't. Jacob was standing in the center of the bar, his expression blank with just a hint of the storm that raged beneath showing through the mask of calm, and some poor idiot that had been stupid enough to start something with him was crumbled a few steps from his feet. The bartender was already reaching for the phone, likely about to call the cops, but Ressler reached for his badge as discretely as possible. "I have this."

He shot Ressler a look, but nodded, and the agent moved forward, catching Jacob by the shoulder and moving him roughly to the door. His friend started to fight back, but he had handled an intoxicated and angry Jacob Phelps before. It had been a while, but it was something like riding a bike. He was just glad that they had his card on file and not Jacob's. Maybe they could keep it quiet.

"Let go of me, man!"

"You done acting like a complete ass?" Ressler demanded roughly, shoving his friend hard so that he would have time to move if he decided to take a swing in retaliation. It was a good thing, too, because the younger man tied to catch him in the jaw with what might have been a hard right hook had he been sober. Ressler dodged and caught him as he sank down, looking like the world might have been spinning a little. He wrapped his arms around him, easing him down to the curb and waited for a long moment as Jacob leaned forward, elbows braced on his knees, and looked entirely miserable. "You done?"

"He took the first swing," Jacob grumbled, the excuse ringing hollow even if the cut along his eyebrow proved it likely true.

"Didn't mean you had to pummel him."

Jacob snorted and leaned forward. Ressler grimaced and reached for him, feeling the younger man tense under his touch. "You're at boiling point, Jake. Liz and I both see it. She's worried, and after tonight, I see why." He paused, looking for any sign he was getting through. "Whatever you're holding back, you need to get it out. You and I both know that while finding Solomon will help, it won't fix it."

"I know."

"I'm not sure you do." He sighed, his phone buzzing in his pocket. "Jake, talk to Liz if nothing else. You two… She'll get it. I don't think you have to worry about scaring her off anymore."

Jacob looked up at him, a haunted sort of surprise echoing in his eyes as Ressler held the phone up to his ear. "Speaking of. I was just telling your husband to-"

" _Don, stop. It's Audrey. We're on the way to the hospital_."

Ressler felt the world drop out from beneath him. "What?"

" _I'll text you details as soon as I have them_."

"Wait, Liz! Is she… Are she and the baby okay?"

" _I don't know, Don. I have to go_."

The call ended abruptly and Ressler felt numb.

"Ress, what happened?" Jacob asked quietly from his side.

"Audrey's on her way to the hospital. Liz isn't sure what's wrong, but-"

"I'll call a cab. Neither of us should drive."

Ressler nodded. He had thought nothing could terrify him more than the things he had seen. Audrey in Tanida's crosshairs or Jacob being held by Solomon, but this… He couldn't do anything about this. All he could do was be terrified of losing his wife and child.

"C'mon," Jacob coaxed.

"We're not done with this," Ressler told him thickly and it pulled a small smile out of his friend.

"I know. Let's handle important things before you worry about me, okay?"

Ressler didn't have the energy to argue as his friend helped him up and towards the cab.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: One of the things that bothers in the show is the fact that they handle the emotional fallout of truly traumatic situations. I have a lot of fun with Jacob in this, because having a family that cares for him unconditionally from fourteen on helps balance him, even if it doesn't heal every wound that he's ever suffered. He has new ones, different ones, and some scars never fade entirely, but I've found him at least more balanced in this AU because of Kelly and Bruce... saying that, he's still Jacob and he still has issues handling and sometimes even understanding his own emotions.

Next time - Audrey goes into labour, Jacob lets Liz in on a secret, and Red attends a Christmas party with far too many feds involved.


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter Forty-Six**

Liz was about certain that she had seen the inside of too many hospital waiting rooms for emergencies in the last few years. She sat leaned forward in her seat, forearms braced against her knees, and her thumb playing with her wedding rings as she waited. The doctor wouldn't tell her anything.

The doors opened, pulling her attention, and she saw her husband and his best friend enter. Liz was on her feet in an instant, making a beeline for Ressler and motioning over to the woman sitting behind a desk. "That's the person you need to talk to. They won't tell me a damn thing."

"Seriously? You couldn't have pulled some spycraft on them and gotten answers for me by the time I got here?" Ressler snapped, moving past her and to the nurse at the desk.

"He'll be fine. He's just-"

"I know he is," Liz cut him off, grabbing his chin to tug him to the side a little to get a better view of what looked like a cut from a ring of some sort. "So what is your excuse? Were you in a bar fight? Really?"

Jacob cringed. "He took a swing at me."

"Should we be watching for him to come in next?" Liz pulled in a steadying breath and pulled her husband to the corner of the room. He looked a little rattled by the sudden switch, but when Liz had sent him out with his partner for a guys' night she had hoped that he would tell Ressler whatever he was afraid to tell her. Apparently he had just used it as an excuse to sink further. "I have been patient because I know you've been through hell, but it's not helping you. It's making it worse and I-" she closed her eyes, trying to pull herself back. She would not manipulate him to get him where she knew he needed to go. She needed to be honest. Honesty was all she was allowed to use. "I don't want to lose you after just getting you back," she breathed at last. "We're both home, but you always seem to be somewhere else. I know you want to be, but-"

"I'm sorry," he managed and she shook her head, her fingers still lingering on the side of his face.

"Don't be sorry. Just be honest with me," she pleaded. "Isn't that what we promised we would do?"

He gave a tense nod. "I don't… Liz, I don't want…"

"You're not going to scare me away. Promise." She caught his gaze, finding him hesitant. "I've been to my share of dark places. I just want to help you through yours like you would for me."

There was a long moment before his well crafted mask cracked and he gave her a small nod. "When this is over I have something I need to show you."

"Show me?"

"It's easier to show you to explain."

She nodded slowly before tipping up on her toes and pressing a kiss to his lips. "We're a team," she reminded him. "Just don't go anywhere I can't follow."

Jacob's expression softened. "Promise."

"Good. You want to go see if we can find anything out?"

She waited until he gave her a thin, strained smile before taking his hand, pulling him after her. The nurse, who had apparently been informed that they were family, told them that Audrey had gone into labour. Early, yes, but now they were waiting.

They sat together, leaned against one another waiting for a long time in silence before Liz loosed a breath. "I still want kids. Is that insane?"

She felt Jacob sit up a little straighter. "Yeah?"

Liz laughed softly at the reaction. "Are you asking or saying I'm crazy?"

He gave her an increasingly rare smile. "Asking. That's… I don't know. I guess I just thought…" He swallowed hard, taking her hand. "Me too."

"How though? I mean, I know how much adoption means to you."

"We'll find a way. We're a team, right?"

"Right," she agreed and kissed him.

"Hey you two?"

Liz and Jacob looked up, finding Ressler with a very odd look plastered across his face. "Is that a smile, Don?" Liz teased.

"You want to come meet him?"

"Already?"

He gave them both a look that made Liz wonder if they had lost track of time. They stood and followed him back through the halls to a private room where Audrey looked exhausted, but thrilled, holding a little bundle in her arms.

"So he's okay?"

"Both are," Ressler answered.

"He's just impatient," Liz said with a smile. "And handsome. How're you feeling, Audrey?"

"Better now."

"So are you guys _finally_ going to tell us his name?" Jacob grumbled, but the corners of his mouth were twitching upward.

Ressler rolled his eyes good naturedly. "Elliot."

Liz's husband blanched. "Elliott? Seriously Ress? Is his middle name _Ness_?" he choked out between laughs.

Ressler, though, looked just a little smug. "Jacob, actually."

Jacob went immediately quiet, all sarcasm put away and his expression flickered between several emotions like he couldn't quite settle in one. Finally it went blank, as he had a habit of allowing it to do when he was uncertain, but it didn't reach his eyes. He blinked hard and Liz couldn't help but smile as her husband gave his partner a brief nod before turning to his little godson. "Hey, Elliott," he greeted, his voice a little rough.

"Look at that, he _can_ be serious," Ressler teased with a half smirk.

"Shut up," Jacob grumbled in return and Liz popped him on the shoulder.

"Be nice."

"Have I mentioned that I'm not a fan of you two teaming up against me?" he groused, but his expression had softened considerably and Liz wrapped an arm around his middle in a side hug.

"Let's give them some time?"

Jacob nodded, offering his friend a congratulations before they slipped back out of the hospital room. As they walked down the hall Liz felt his hand reach for hers. "Yes we're a little crazy, but if we can give a kid a home, that's okay. I'm willing to be a little crazy for still wanting that."

She grinned at him, tightening her grip. "Now, I think it's time you showed me what it was you were talking about," Liz told him and watched her husband's expression darken immediate. He nodded, though, and they started for the car.

* * *

Jacob felt his stomach turn to a knotted mess by the time they pulled up in front of the storage units. It was closer to morning than evening at that point and they were both exhausted, but Liz wouldn't let him squirm out of it.

She was silent at his side as they parked the jeep and stepped out. He keyed in the access code to let them into the building. Liz pulled her coat a little closer around her shoulders as they moved inside and he could feel her taking everything in as if she were trying to get an idea what to expect.

He had the key out and fitted into the lock when he stilled, a worry reaching so deep that he couldn't quite make himself turn it. Liz reached out, her hand covering his. "There is nothing on the other side of this door that could make me love you any less," she swore.

Jacob looked at her, finding a sincerity in her eyes that he didn't question. After a moment he gave her a stiff nod and turned the key, the door swinging open to reveal his secret.

Liz stepped inside, her gaze sweeping across the board of information, following links, and taking it all in. After a moment she reached up and removed the knit cap she was wearing and shrugged her jacket off to lay it across the back of a chair. She still didn't speak as she stepped forward, studying the information. Finally she glanced back at him. "I had one of these on you, you know."

"That's not at all creepy, babe."

She made a face and rolled her eyes. "I just mean that it's effective."

He gave her a brief, small smile before it faded again, his eyes turning on the images of the man that had tortured him. "Is that all you're going to say about it?"

"From one professional to another, it's well put together. You've done your homework," she answered as she picked up a few notes to look through them.

"And as my wife?"

She paused, staring at the papers in her hand and she swallowed hard. "As your wife I'm worried," she confessed softly. "I think… you're obsessing and you were going to keep shutting me out as long as you could get away with it."

"Probably," he admitted.

Liz closed her eyes, as if sterling herself. "What happened in Cape Town and why is this so different?" She turned her gaze on him. "I'm not judging you, I just need to know how to help you through this."

Jacob loosed a breath. "How do you know about Cape Town?"

"Red."

He snorted. Of _course_ Reddington knew. "The difference is that I was held and tortured a few days there."

"How'd you get out?"

He shifted uncomfortably and Liz pulled the chair around and took a seat, signifying she had no plans to leave soon. "Would it help if I gave you things from my past that I'm not overly proud of, but had to be done to survive?"

Jacob have a mirthless chuckle. "No, that's okay. I killed them. All of them. It was… We really weren't supposed to be where we were anyway, but a lead had gotten us there. I convinced Ress to go and I got us in hot water because of it. By the time Ress got in to help extract me, I'd gotten myself out."

"You got closure," Liz murmured thoughtfully. "They couldn't come for you again."

His expression darkened. "No. I made sure of that."

"And Solomon is still free." She stood, crossing the space between them and Jacob didn't move as she reached up, her hand against the side of his face. "We'll get him. One way or the other."

It took a moment, but Jacob felt his walls begin to crumble and with that went the stony expression he had been watching her with. He leaned into her touch, his own hand coming up to cover hers and move it around so he could press a kiss to her scarred palm. "I don't deserve you," he breathed out and felt her arms go around him.

"You're never going to scare me away, Jacob. I know you… I know you've worried about that, but now you know _why_ you can't. You're a good man that may have done a few things to survive. I'm glad you did. I don't want a world without you in it." She took a step back. "Don't go where I can't follow?"

"Okay."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"We'll find him together, Jacob, but we will find him. I promise."

He nodded, kissing the top of her head. "Love you."

"You too. Always." She finally released him, pulling back and turning to his hard work. "So, now that I know where you're _actually_ going on your super early morning runs, why don't you bring me up to speed so we can find this bastard?"

* * *

Elizabeth Phelps had known every side of life. She'd seen what it could be at its best, it's worse, and she had seen what it was like to pretend things were good to the point that she almost started believing it herself. It was both dangerous and had been a necessity as a deep cover agent, but it has always left her with the possibility of being blindsided later.

Thankfully, she reminded herself as she leaned against the counter in her kitchen and watched some of the people she dared to call friends chat around he townhouse, she was no longer a deep cover operative. This was real. She lived in her real home with her real husband living their real life. It was hard, but the best things in life were worth fighting for. Even impromptu Christmas parties that a certain FBI technician had somehow talked them into hosting.

"I hope you're not here to mess with the food cooking."

Liz turned, grinning at husband that had snuck up behind her and was in the middle of wrapping his arms around her, leaning to fit his chin against her shoulder. "I know better. No fires."

"Oh good," he chuckled and she leaned back into him.

"I think this was a good idea." Jacob snorted softly and she turned. "What?"

"You. You're cute. You think you can trick me into being social by inviting people I can tolerate. Your buddy Reddington planning to make an appearance?"

" _My_ buddy?"

Her husband shrugged. "Seems to be. Things have been kind of quiet around the office without him dropping new cases at the doorstep."

"He knows we have our hands full wrapping up the Cabal situation," Liz said carefully.

"I know," Jacob said almost sulkily. "I just keep thinking that Cooper is keeping me on desk duty because he doesn't want me going after Solomon, so if Red gave us something else-"

"Maybe he just wants to make sure you have your head in the game before you jump back in."

Jacob huffed. "Three months. I've had three months. I'm fine."

"You had two years after you were shot and we decided you were never going back to the field," Liz snapped, the words leaving her before she ever really gave them permission.

"So, what? You want me to take a permanent desk job while you-"

"I never said that, Jacob," Liz tried, but she could already see the frustration.

"If you want me out, why don't you just say so?"

"I want you _safe_!"

A small sound drew both of their attention and they turned towards the entrance of the kitchen where Meera Malik stood, a bottle of wine in her hand and a look that said she wanted to be anywhere but interrupting the domestic dispute. Liz hadn't seen her since before she had gone on the run and no one seemed to have a straight answer about where she had been. There were rumours and a few facts, though some were hard to tell between. Her ex husband had been killed by Solomon on Kotsiopulos' orders and reason had it, since she never showed to help Liz and Ressler break Jacob from the Cabal's grasp, that they had been alerted either through her or because of her.

Now she stood in their home and looked highly uncomfortable.

"Hey," Jacob greeted. "Long time no see,"

"I've been tying up loose ends for my retirement," she answered tightly. "I'm getting out."

"Yeah we heard about what happened. It sucks."

Meera gave a tight smile. "Very much. My children need me now and… well, they need me more than the team does. I wanted to drop by here to say goodbye to everyone and possibly see Ressler's little one before bowing out." Her gaze flickered to Liz and she looked torn. "I also, no matter how useless they are at this point, wanted to offer apologies. I meant to be there to help with the breakout. They… hit a weak point with me."

Liz grimaced and risked a look at her husband. "Family is what matters in the end. We got him out."

"And you nearly died for it," Meera answered sharply.

"No one blames you for that," Jacob said. "You made the best judgement call in a crap situation. No one here holds that against you."

She looked between them both and tried for a smile. She was thinner than before, with dark circles under her eyes and a strained sort of look that didn't fade. "We don't," Liz echoed her husband's sentiment.

"Thank you. I appreciate it. I do. This job can take it all from you if you're not careful." She looked between them. "You two are impressive, I have to give you that. I wish you the best of luck. Really I do."

"Thank you," Liz said quietly. She was cutting ties, there was no question about it, and part of her truly understood that. She waited until Meera set the Christmas gift on the counter and left the room before she turned back to her husband and steeled herself. "I'm the one that recommended that Cooper keep you out of the field," she confessed nearly in one breath, the words running together and shoved from her lips by the terror of how he would react to the secret. "I was… scared. You were keeping secrets and I didn't know what those were."

"You do now," Jacob whispered.

"I do, and we _will_ find him, but Jacob, I'm…" She swallowed hard and reached up to his face, her palm against his cheek. "I love you, and I don't want to see you hurt anymore. Facing him? Being forced into that choice… You're a good man, even if you don't see it."

He gave her a soft laugh and pulled her into a tight embrace. "I love you."

"You're not mad?"

"I am, but I love you more than I'm angry at you. I need you to know that right now… And, babe?" He pulled back from her so that they were staring into each other's eyes. "We work with Reddington. Let's not become him, okay? No more secrets, even if we're just protecting each other."

She nodded and wrapped her arms around him again. "I promise. No more."

She felt him kiss her head and they stood there, holding onto each other as if the crashing waves might take them under the chaos if they let go. She loved him. Him and all of the pieces that his life threatened to shatter him into. She loved all of him.

* * *

Raymond Reddington had come to the conclusion that he spent far too much time with federal agents these days. He worked with them and now he was attending the task force's little Christmas party. If anyone other than Elizabeth had invited him, he would have most certainly said no.

But she did and there he was in the Phelps townhouse that was decorated in a way that could have only been a means of trying to distract her husband. She had told him about Jacob's little hobby as of late and Reddington knew it weighed on her. It was much easier to fight an enemy with a gun or bare knuckles than one's own demons every night. The man needed closure, yet the task force was unable to give it to him yet, and that same task force was hesitant to allow him into the field until he had said closure. It was a vicious loop and it desperately needed to end.

Meera Malik had made an appearance, Red saw, and was bent over Audrey Bidwell-Ressler and the tiny little thing in her arms, the first look of happiness showing on her face since the Cabal had murdered the father of her own children. She wanted to disappearance, she had told Red, and he had agreed to make it happen. After the new year the FBI would never be able to find her even if they wanted to. It was a sad ending, after everything she had put into the task force, but he understood her need to focus on what she had left in the wake of her tragedy.

"I didn't think you'd show up here." Reddington turned to find Donald Ressler offering him a drink. "Jake said you like to steal his scotch."

"Stealing is a bit of an exaggeration," Reddington sighed. "I will blame you for this though. And congratulations, by the way. I hadn't had a chance to say."

Ressler chuckled. "Who would have thought a couple of years ago that you could even walk into Jake's house without him shooting you?"

"Oh, he still threatens to," Reddington acknowledged. "He's considerably less likely to actually do so these days." He looked around. "Speaking of…"

"Last I saw he and Liz were having some sort of serious conversation in the kitchen."

"Oh my," Reddington murmured noncommittally as his gaze drifted over. Last he had heard Jacob had some sort of tracking board and was following leads from it as best as he could to keep himself occupied. Elizabeth already knew about it, so he wondered what else could have set them off. His gaze moved back around the room slowly until he finally huffed. He had no interest in being here any longer than he really needed to.

Ressler was quickly distracted by Cooper's wife who wanted to see the newest addition to the household and Reddington used the moment to slip into the kitchen. Whatever tense conversation they may have had seemed settled by the time he arrived into it, and both Elizabeth and Jacob Phelps looked over to him. Elizabeth's face lit instantly and it warmed Red's heart. "You came!"

"And you're already into the scotch," Jacob grumbled, but a small smirk played out on his lips.

"Donald may take the blame for that," Reddington countered. "Elizabeth, may I borrow your husband for just a moment?"

She gave him a hesitant look, but finally nodded. "Don't let him give you too much hell over the scotch. It was from his dad at our wedding and I'm pretty sure you were the one that opened it."

Reddington chuckled as she walked into the main room and his gaze slid to the younger man. "Well played, Agent Phelps."

Jacob smirked and shrugged. "What do you want, Reddington?"

"Right to the point. Very well. I've come to offer you a Christmas gift."

"A replacement bottle of scotch?"

"No." Reddington reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a slip of paper, handing it over.

The dark haired agent eyed the address for a moment before looking up. "Is this supposed to mean something to me?"

"It depends. It's where I currently have Matias Solomon held. I'll be done with him in a few hours. Let your guests clear out and you may either come arrest him or I'll have a gun that won't be traced back to you if you'd prefer to put a bullet between his eyes. It's entirely up to you."

Jacob stared at him with wide eyes. "Have you told Liz?"

Reddington's gaze slid lazily back towards the main room to where Elizabeth was laughing with Audrey and playing with the newest addition to the Ressler family. "Elizabeth asked me to look into the matter. I'm sure she hoped I'd kill him myself or turn him in, but… I've fought my share of demons, Agent Phelps. Sometimes the only way to do that is to do it yourself."

"And if I choose to arrest him?"

"Then that's your prerogative. You are a federal agent, after all. Though I certainly won't be the one to judge you should you choose to leave the badge at home."

He nodded, the understanding ringing crystal clear.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I think I'm updating later than usual this week. Sorry! Life's been a bit crazy and the time change always messes with my head a little. Hopefully the next chapter will be up fairly shortly. I went back and forth on keeping it along with this chapter, but it was pretty long all together, so I split it into two. Not that I would _ever_ leave you guys with a cliffhanger :P

Next time - Jacob makes a choice about Solomon and Red receives a phone call from a person he never thought he'd hear from again.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter Forty-Seven**

Elizabeth Phelps closed the door behind their last guest, feeling a sense of relief wash through her at the quietness that followed. Hudson had long since given up his quest for food and had gone upstairs to hide from the crowd, and she half expected her husband to be on his way up to find a way to unwind before bed. She turned, though, and found him tugging his jacket over his shoulders. "Going somewhere?"

Jacob pulled in a long breath, his gaze not quite meeting hers. "Reddington's Christmas present."

"Yeah, what was that?" she asked curiously, moving towards him and wrapping her arms around his middle. He was tense and she didn't like the look in his eyes.

"Matias Solomon."

The name caused her to blink hard. "What?"

"He has him. At this address." He held up a slip of paper and she took it from him, inspecting it as he continued to speak in a way that sounded like he would have prefered to be discussing anything else. "He said that he's done with him, and that he's delivering him into my custody."

"Why yours? Why not Cooper's?" she asked immediately. Or better yet, why hadn't Reddington killed the bastard himself? When she had reached out to him, that had been her intention. He could have gotten the information from him, put a bullet in his head, and that would have been the end of it. Jacob would have been free of him. That had been the plan.

"Because he's giving me a choice," Jacob said roughly. "Take him in or take him out."

Liz blinked hard. "Jacob…"

He looked at her sharply. "What?"

She swallowed, immediately easing her tone. "You're planning on killing him, aren't you?"

"And if I am? The Cabal hasn't been entirely rooted out yet. If he goes to prison, then what? A judge lets him off or a guard leaves his cell unlocked? Any number of things could happen."

"You're not judge and jury, Jacob."

"You sound like Ress," he snapped. "I thought you said that you were with me on this."

"I am. I'm not against you, babe, I just want you to consider what this could do to you." She chewed on her bottom lip a little. She wasn't judging him. She certainly didn't have any room to, but she didn't want him to lose himself to this. Some lines couldn't be uncrossed, and what he was talking about was further than he had ever gone.

Jacob snorted, his expression closing off. "What it could do to me? What do you think I am, Liz? He wouldn't be the first person killed and he probably wouldn't be the last. You know that."

"I do, and I'm not-"

"You know what, I'll tell you what I decide after I'm done," he snapped, grabbing his keys from the bowl by the door. "Don't wait up."

Liz cringed as the door slammed behind him and she was left alone in their home. She hadn't meant to make him feel like she was against him, but he had been balanced on such a thin ledge lately that she knew that he wasn't seeing the whole situation. He had no way to know what it would do to him to take the life of an unarmed man out of vengeance. She did, and as blood stained as her soul was, it had added even more weight to it. If she could take it back, she would have in an instant, but as soon as that life left the eyes, there was no turning back. Jacob had killed, but he wasn't a murderer. There was a difference there that he didn't see yet or didn't want to see, and it left his wife with a fear for him that she couldn't push aside.

* * *

Jacob cut the lights on the jeep just after midnight as he pulled up to the outside of the old, seemingly abandoned apartment building that Reddington had left him the address for. His temper had cooled a little on the drive over there, leaving him with a sort of hollowness that he couldn't quite overcome. Somewhere along the drive he had decided that he would take Solomon in. Jacob couldn't claim to have the best moral compass if left to himself, but he had people that he didn't want to disappoint. His parents, Ress, and Liz… those were all people that he hoped to avoid disappointing. Liz seemed to have some fantasy in her mind that he was a good man, and part of him didn't want to spoil that. In his experience, if he pretended to be something long enough, it sort of just became true. That was how he had joined the FBI in the first place, and how he had become such a talented agent: he'd played at it long enough that he was good. He didn't have some internal drive to make the world a better place, particularly, but the few of the people that he truly cared about in his life did, and he pushed forward in that life for them. If killing Solomon would somehow taint that fantasy of Liz's, he would swallow down his need to see him dead and he would do what most people would consider right. He would arrest him.

But as he followed Dembe through the hall and into and old apartment where Matias Solomon was strapped to a chair, Reddington and a man Jacob had never seen standing over him as if they had been interrogating him, he found his resolve sway dangerously.

"Ah, Agent Phelps. Good evening. I hope you'll forgive me for not staying long at the party. As you see I had a few loose ends to tie up," Reddington greeted, looking past him. "I see Elizabeth didn't join you."

"No."

"Does she know?"

"Yes."

Reddington eyed him for a moment, as if trying to discern the truth behind the sharp, tight word. Jacob drew himself up to his full height, squaring his shoulders, and turned his attention to the beaten man that had held him and tortured him for over a month. Solomon was watching him out of the eye that wasn't swollen shut, that terrible smirk of his tilting one corner of his mouth upward. "Hello, Jacob. Come to arrest me?"

"We're about done here," Reddington said, motioning to the balding man with an oxygen tank at his side who nodded, wheeling it away. The wheels squeaked all the way down the hall, leaving Jacob with the want to cringe at the sound. "This can go one of two ways. Should you choose to arrest him, I would like to be out of the area when you call in your backup, though if you plan to end him this evening I will have Mr Kaplan meet us here to ensure that his death is not linked back to you."

Jacob gave a firm nod and he swallowed hard, looking at the man who was meeting his gaze without an ounce of fear in his dark eyes. There was no question now. If Jacob arrested him Solomon _would_ find a way to break free, and when he did the nightmare that had been the last three months would start all over again. Liz wanted a normal life, a family, and he wanted that too. To have it, some things needed to be done. He needed to make sure they were safe. "He's not leaving here alive," Jacob murmured.

Reddington nodded his understanding and reached into his jacket to pull a gun out. He handed it over and Jacob took it readily, his expression even. He leveled the gun so that it was aimed between the other man's eyes and Solomon leaned into it. "If you're going to do it, get it over with."

"Jacob?"

Jacob froze, knowing the voice far too well. He lowered the gun and turned, finding his wife lingering at the door. She looked torn rather than judgemental, and started forward. "Babe, I understand why you're doing this. I understand that you think that his death will bring you some sort of peace, but it won't. From my own experience, it won't."

"Killing him is no different than killing the men in Cape Town," Jacob argued.

"Except they were armed and you were fighting for your life."

"He'll come after us. You, me, and any family we ever try to have. This is _necessary_ ," he snapped, feeling his emotions shift dangerously.

Liz crossed the space between them, her hand seeking out his free one. Her fingers slipped into his and he looked desperately at her. "Not by your hand it isn't."

"My hands aren't clean, Liz."

"Neither are mine. Trust me, I know from experience, if you cross this line, it changes you. He's hurt you enough. Hurt _us_ enough. I don't want to see you go through that. I love you too much."

Jacob blinked, surprised to find his vision blurring a little with rare tears. His wife tipped up on her toes, pressing a kiss to his lips, and he felt her pull the gun from his loosening fingers. "Okay," he breathed.

Liz opened her eyes and he saw a strange sort of resolve in them before she turned, leveled the gun, and fired three rounds into Solomon's chest. The room was silent for a long moment as Jacob's torturer slumped forward and Liz lowered the gun and turned to offer him a strained half-smile. "Just because you shouldn't doesn't mean I can't. I love you," she repeated.

He stared at her for a long moment, the realization sinking in that she had done it for him. In her way, she had protected him from something she was convinced would hurt him. "I love you too," Jacob assured her after several beats of silence, his voice a little raspy. That was the one thing he was certain of in that moment.

"Well alright then," Reddington mumbled from his place mostly forgotten in the wake of everything. "I'll call Mr Kaplan and you…. Lizzie, stop looking at me like that. It had to be his decision. You and I both know that."

Liz looked ready to boil over, but the words hung in the air with resonating truth that even she couldn't deny. Jacob loosed a breath, suddenly feeling exhausted. All he wanted to do now was focus on moving past it, and for the first time since they had descended into their newest layer of hell, he felt like they might be able to do just that. "Liz? Babe, it's over."

She looked up at him a little startled by his words and he offered her a tight smile. He felt her studying him carefully, as if she weren't quite sure if it was or not. He didn't blame her.

Finally his wife handed the gun over to Reddington. "Thank you."

The Concierge of Crime quirked an eyebrow. "Of course. I hope this puts you back on the right track. The Cabal is weakened, but, Elizabeth, I don't need to tell you that they are _not_ the only enemy out there. Agent Phelps, if you are determined to be with her, I hope you can find it within yourself to focus now."

"Is there something you haven't told us, Red?" Liz pressed.

Reddington chuckled. "Oh, quite a bit. This is a war I've been fighting for over twenty years. Enjoy your holiday."

They watched him walk and Liz snorted. "I don't think I'll ever really decide if he's some sort of guardian angel or a demon."

"That's a little dramatic," Jacob chuckled softly.

"It's Reddington." She turned to look at him. "Are we okay?"

"Yes," he promised her and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Let's go home."

Liz gave him a brief nod and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, feeling hers snake around his back. They had moved into strange territory that night, but he was more comfortable with it than he probably should be. It was complicated, but so was their life now. That wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Complications just meant they had to fight a little harder, and if there was one thing loving Liz had taught him, it was that she was worth fighting for, and from the way she held onto him as they moved out to their jeep, he was certain she felt the same.

* * *

"They'll be alright, Raymond."

The reassuring words were spoken so softly that if Reddington hadn't been used to listening for them he likely wouldn't have heard them at all. "Thank you, Dembe. I know. I just… worry for her."

"She is stronger than you give her credit for."

A small smile perked his lips. "She gets it from her mother." He paused as the cell phone in his breast pocket began to ring and he frowned at the blocked number. Against his better judgement he flipped the phone open and waited. The voice that met him, familiar even after all of those years, sent chills down his spine.

" _Did you think you could keep her hidden forever, Raymond_?"

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I'm sorry for the slower-than usual updates lately. I've been really busy at work and just in general so I've had less time to write. I appreciate every one of your reviews and love to hear from you! I hope you're still enjoying this as much as I am :)

It took me several tries to get this chapter right. For a long while I wasn't sure how Solomon was going to die. I'll be really interested to see how it plays out in the show (I'm rooting for Dembe, honestly), but here he's damaged _so many_ people that I had my pick. I was chatting with a friend about it one night and realized that Liz would try to keep Jacob's hands as clean as they could be. She loves him, and she feels that her hands are already so so covered in blood that it won't matter if it's on her. She becomes a bit like his sin eater. I decided I rather liked the idea and that one finally stuck.

Anyone want to hazard a guess who that is on the phone with Red?

Next time - The task force takes on a case to bring down a team of diamond thieves, Reddington warns the Phelps' that the war is not over, and Jacob and Liz pursue adopting a child once again. 


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter Forty-Eight**

By the time the New Year finally rolled around Liz was half certain that her husband was going to go stir crazy without a case to focus on. Cooper had finally cleared him, but in the wake of the Cabal there seemed to be more paperwork than footwork.

In the spirit of a new year, they had started looking into their options for adoption again. They had a meeting set up for late that afternoon with the social worker that they had worked with the first time. It left Liz both excited and nervous, but entirely unable to focus on the paperwork in front of her.

"Listen up, people," Cooper called from the stairs as he was making his way down, Ressler and Jacob following close behind. The spring in her husband's step could only mean a case, but Liz knew it didn't come from Reddington. He had been off doing whatever he did when he wasn't tugging the task force around like his own person collection of marionettes. Cooper motioned to Aram and Samar leaned her hip against the desk Liz was sitting at, arms crossed and watching the screen. "The DC field office handed this case over to us this morning when New York reached out to them to provide a tip that a jewellery thief ring that hit three major stores in New York City over the course of the last year is rumoured to be in DC."

"Three?" Samar asked incredulously. "Why are we being brought in?"

"Three just in New York, but they've been linked more all around the world. A friend at the DC field office asked me to take a look, and since Reddington hasn't handed us a new case and the Cabal situation is under control, we have some free time," Cooper said. "The Intel says that the leader of this gang of thieves is in DC to personally oversee the heist."

Aram pulled up a new picture of a man and Liz leaned back in her chair. "Is this the clearest picture we have to go off of?" He was wearing a baseball cap that covered half of his face, leaving only a square jaw truly visible. T-shirt, jeans, tennis shoes… He could have been anyone.

"Not yet. That's what we need to find out. Liz, I want you to reach out to Reddington, Samar to your international contacts."

Liz glanced over to Jacob who leaned down to press a quick kiss to her cheek. "We'll make the appointment."

"We're already working against the odds anyway on this," Liz murmured, hating the flash of worry that didn't linger in her husband's gaze. The first time they had been worried his past might have caused them trouble, but now that Elizabeth Phelps was nationally recognized as Masha Rostova, it only increased the complications.

"I know, but it'll be fine. We'll be fine."

"You know when you go into your annoyingly positive mode you sound like you're trying to convince us both," she pointed out with a small smile.

"I kind of miss the days when I thought I could get away with that," he chuckled.

"Then you realized you married a trained operative," she teased.

"Yep. I'm going with you to meet up with Red, though. That way we can make it. This is going to be it."

There was such determination in his voice that she had to smile. "I love you."

He grinned at her. "You too. Let's get going."

He paused, halfway into stepping back to let her up. She knew that look. He had something to say and his clever mind was trying to find the best way to phrase it so she wouldn't shoot it down. "What?" she prompted and he had the decency to look a little sheepish.

"Let's hold off on telling Reddington about the adoption, okay? He… seems determined that we're not out of the woods yet-"

"Babe, I'm not sure we ever will be," Liz said softly. "If we wait for a good time, we'll always be waiting."

He nodded. "Yeah, but he doesn't get that. I just… I don't want him adding to the complications."

Liz stood slowly and reached for his hand. "Okay."

Her husband blinked. "Okay?"

"I think you're right, so no argument."

A smile tilted his lips and his expression softened. "Okay. Let's deal with Red so we can get to the meeting."

* * *

Raymond Reddington was often exhausted, but nothing, not even the Cabal, could have kept him up at night quite like the phone call he had received from a woman long assumed dead. His first instinct had been to go straight to the Phelps home a whisk Elizabeth- and her husband, if he really had to - away and hide her away in some remote location. He had forced that impulse back, though. The phone call to his burner could only mean that she was close and she was watching. Moving to alert Elizabeth would only back her into a corner, and if Reddington knew one thing about their newest threat, it was that she was never more dangerous than when she was backed into a corner. He needed to tread very carefully from this point forward.

He had spent his time digging deeper into the remnants of the Cabal, an organization that had proved time and again to rise from the ashes. Laurel Hitchin was certain that he wanted a place at the table for his own power and he had let her believe that, slowly working his way through it. There was a man that he seemed to be in competition with for the head of the table, though, and he was yet to meet him. In fact, he didn't even know his face. Apparently only a handful of very tight lipped people did. Patience was a virtue, so they said, and he had found that life required a delicate balance of patience and perseverance to make sure that one didn't become so complacent that it rolled right over them. He would find this person and he would crush him. He refused to leave an enemy standing after this.

"Sorry to call on such short notice."

Reddington turned, finding Elizabeth and her husband approaching where he was seated in the park, the chess board set in front of him. She eyed it for a second. "You prefer playing against yourself?"

"At times it feels that way," he murmured. "You said this was time sensitive?"

"We're looking into a ring of thieves that have hit multiple jewellery stores worldwide. The New York office sent down this picture," Jacob explained and handed over the most worthless picture Reddington had ever seen.

He shot the younger man a withering look, but didn't bother voicing the comment. "Where have they hit recently?"

"New York City seems to be a favourite," Elizabeth said. "Three times in one year, but they've hit Paris, London, Amsterdam, Chicago, and Dallas. Rumour has it they're coming here next." She paused and Red felt her gaze linger. "Could that be James Mallory?"

Reddington leaned in a little closer to the photo and wrinkled his nose. "Last I heard he was incarcerated in… oh where was it? Mumbai? Though there were rumours he'd gotten out."

"Funny, rumour has it he went to you for that break out," Jacob said as he took the seat opposite of him as if he meant to join the chess game.

"Don't kid yourself, Agent Phelps. You're clever, but you're not even in my league," Red told him pointedly.

"Thought we talked about you underestimating me," he answered with a smirk.

"Boys," Liz warned. "Red, _if_ Mallory were in town, where would he be?"

The Concierge of Crime looked back at her. "I'll reach out to him and see. He won't turn me away."

"And what do you want in return?"

He smiled innocently. "Cancel the adoption meeting."

"Excuse me?" Jacob growled from where he was still seated across the table.

"It's a request, not a demand, Agent Phelps. Please remember to breathe."

"Red," Liz said in that tone he had learn to hate when they had been on the run together. "Boundaries."

"I'm well aware, but I've stressed to you - to _both_ of you - that this is not over. Bringing a child in now is reckless."

"And when will it be alright for your time table?" the FBI agent snapped heatedly.

Reddington sighed. "I just ask that you consider it, Lizzie. Your focus should not be divided right now."

"My focus is on my family. We've discussed this and made up our minds."

Reddington frowned a little, but there was no point arguing with her. It would only cause a rift they couldn't afford.

"And don't even think about sabotaging it."

He raised his hands. "I've said what I need to say on it. I just fear that your mistake will be on more than just the two of you."

"We get your point, Reddington," Jacob said, "you don't approve."

"And you don't care," Reddington grumbled in return. "You've made that quite clear, Agent Phelps." He turned to Elizabeth, pointedly ignoring the glare her husband was lobbing in his direction. "I will contact Mr Mallory because you've asked me to, but I do hope you will consider what I've said. This is not over. There are dangers that even with your experiences, you couldn't begin to comprehend."

"Then maybe you should just _tell_ me."

Reddington frowned. "It's not that simple."

"Here's the thing, Red," Liz said calmly, never breaking eye contact. "I will find out, and it's going to be a lot better coming from you. You and I both know that. You want to protect me? You want to help protect my family? Tell me what you're holding back."

"It's not that simple, Elizabeth."

She gave him a smile, but it was hardly real. "Then until then, I'm relying on _our_ judgment. Let us know when you have something. We have some place we need to be."

"I'll contact you when I've reached him," Reddington assured her and watched them leave. He heaved a sigh, turning back to his game.

"Telling her is the right choice, Raymond," Dembe said from his often silent place at his side. "She is no longer a child. Her life has prepared her for this."

Reddington shook his head. "I should never have let her out of my sight that night, Dembe. Of all the things I have ever done, that haunts me the most. She says she can forgive me, but… Perhaps I don't deserve it. That terrible life she's lived? The one she's so desperate to escape? It's my fault. I don't think she ever could forgive me for that."

"You won't know until you tell her."

The older man snorted softly. "Perhaps I don't deserve it," he murmured. "That's for another day. We need to get into contact with James Mallory."

* * *

There were only a select number of stores that had the type of merchandise that the thieves were most likely to go after, and the diamond trader Reinder-de-Groot was one of those. Donald Ressler had spoken to the head of security - a man named Geert Klerken - and set up a meeting with him late in the afternoon. As he entered the store through the front, though, he felt completely out of his element surrounded by high-end jewelry that Audrey would have told him he was an idiot for worrying over if he even bothered. She liked nice things, and he liked to get her nice things, but this was extravagant.

"Special Agent Ressler," a man greeted, moving towards him with an outstretched hand. "Geert Klerken. We spoke on the phone."

Ressler shook his hand. "Thank you for taking time to meet with me. This store has come up on our radar as a potential target in a case we're working-"

"Yes, so you mentioned over the phone. I handle the security personally - and privately - so if you could provide what you have we will contact you if we come across these thieves."

The fair haired agent shook his head, not liking the tone. They were going to try to shut them out of the process. "This is an ongoing investigation. There's only so much we can offer you by way of information on it."

"So what exactly is your purpose here, Agent Ressler?"

"We would like to set someone up in your security-"

"Absolutely not. We handle our own security privately. I fear the only thing I can offer you is information if the thieves attempt to break in here. Of course, we may require a warrant should you wish to have access to certain parts of the store. We do appreciate the warning."

Ressler had been in the job long enough to have a pretty good ear for when someone was hiding something, and Klerken was most certainly shutting him out. He gave the older man a thin and forced smile. "Of course. Here's my card if you see or hear anything."

"Thank you."

He was shown out and waited until he was in his vehicle before pulling his phone out and dialled Cooper. "Sir, we hit a roadblock with Klerken. He's not letting us in. I get the feeling he's hiding something."

"At the expense of losing millions?" Cooper asked.

"He seemed confident in their security method."

Cooper snorted on the other end of the line. "How has Phelps been outside of the office?"

"Are you asking if he's ready for an undercover assignment?"

"Reddington puts us in touch and I was thinking about sending he and Liz in. You've known the man a long time. Is he ready?"

"I think so."

"Good. Get back to the Post Office and we'll get it sorted out."

Ressler ended the call and took one more look at the jewellery store. Well, at least he was never bored.

* * *

Liz was nervous. Not that anyone other than Jacob would have seen it. It was the stillness, rather than movement that gave her away, like she was purposefully controlling it. She sat up straight, not quite rigid, and her hands were folded together. On impulse, he reached out and pried one away from the other, lacing their fingers together. "Love you."

His wife blinked, as if startled out of her thoughts. "Are you really as calm as you look?"

"Sort of. Probably not as stressed as you."

"It wasn't your face plastered across the television as a terrorist five months ago," she grumbled.

Jacob squeezed her hand. "You were acquitted."

"It may not matter. What if it doesn't? Jacob, what if I'm the reason we can't-?"

He used his free hand to tilt her face towards him, stealing a kiss and effectively quieting her. "We're going to be okay," he promised and waited for the hesitant smile.

"Liz and Jacob Phelps. It's been a while."

They turned almost in unison and Jacob offered a smile to the woman they had worked with for over a year to adopt the child that Reddington had taken from them. "Mary, good to see you."

"You know, when you two said life had thrown a curveball, I had no idea," she chuckled and Jacob felt his wife tense a little.

"What I meant then was that Jacob's job was going in a new direction and we needed to make sure we were in a place to make sure our child had the best home possible," Liz said firmly. "Everything has settled out now and we wanted to try again."

Mary smiled. "I'll be frank with you both. Jacob's juvenile records - sealed or not - caused some pause before. This situation that you found yourself in-"

"I was acquitted," Liz said sharply. "Of all charges."

"I understand, and I know you both. You're good people and you will make amazing parents, but…" She sighed. "You'll likely pass the home study again, but your best option will be a closed adoption after all of the press."

"And that could take a lot longer," Jacob voiced quietly.

"We're starting at the beginning again, in a way."

Jacob glanced over to Liz who gave a small nod. "Thanks. I guess we better get started then, huh?"

Liz put on a good face for the rest of the meeting and even out to the car. It had been long enough and enough had changed that they would have to go through it all again. It had been a rough round the first time and he knew she was blaming herself. "It's going to be okay," he promised and Liz snorted a laugh, leaning back hard in the passenger's seat of their jeep.

"Wasn't your face on national television. This was so stupid. They're never going to let us adopt."

He reached across the console and took her hand. "You and I are too damn stubborn to take no for an answer. Mary helped us through it the first time. She knows us. We can talk to Ben too."

"Kelly's brother? The lawyer? I thought you two didn't get along."

"We don't, but he still helped Kelly and Bruce through the adoption process with me. What he can't help directly with, he knows people that can. We can do this."

"You are so annoyingly positive sometimes," she managed and he saw the way her eyes were flashing over with tears. He pulled her hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles.

"We've got this. Trust me?"

She nodded and then he saw her expression fall again. "He's going to hate us more than ever after-"

"Kelly handled all of that. He knows as much as anyone else: you were set up because the Cabal was after your husband's team."

He watched her lips curl up slightly at the corners. "Your mom is kind of sneaky, isn't she?"

"Well, she had to learn to keep up with me as a teenager, so what she didn't know she learned pretty quick. We'll have them over for dinner and talk." She nodded and he held up a hand as his phone started to buzz in his pocket. He fished it out and put it to his ear. "Phelps."

" _Any luck with Reddington yet?_ "

"He didn't reach back out. It takes time." He looked over to Liz who shot him a questioning look and he mouthed his partner's name.

" _That gives us time then. How do you and Liz feel like an undercover job as diamond thieves?_ "

Jacob chuckled. "Putting you on speaker phone," he warned as he did it. "I take it your meeting with Klerken didn't go well?"

" _The guy wasn't very helpful_ ," Ressler sighed.

"Geert Klerken?" Liz asked. "Of course he wasn't. He's notorious for handling thefts in his own way. Namely putting a bullet in the thieves' heads and making it so they never find the bodies. Even if this team hits and somehow gets away with it - which would be incredibly difficult - he doesn't let his people talk to the police or the feds. He handles everything in house and that's what makes him so dangerous."

" _I had a feeling. We're going to need someone on the inside of this. If Reddington can put us in touch, are you guys up for it?_ "

Jacob chuckled. "Going into a group that seems to be aiming for a suicide mission?"

" _Well, if I know you, you'd have the evidence against them long before they break in_."

He glanced over to Liz who offered a nod. "Why not? It'll get you back in the field like you've been wanting."

He grinned broadly at the idea. "Yeah, Ress, we're in."

" _Good. We'll start working everything up in the morning._ " He paused for a beat. " _How'd the meeting go?_ "

"Let's stay focused on the op, huh?"

His friend made a small sound on the other end of the line. " _I'm sorry, man._ "

"We're not out of the running yet," Liz assured him. "We'll be in tomorrow morning."

They ended the phone call and Jacob looked over to her. "You want me to call Kelly and see if she and Bruce are free tonight?"

"Would that be horrible?"

"Yeah, because she complains so much when we want to see her," he teased and leaned over, kissing her quickly. They would be okay. They had to be. He refused to think that the family they had planned for so long was too far out of reach after they had fought so hard.

* * *

"I think it's a fantastic idea," Kelly said as she cut into the lasagna that had finally cooled enough to eat. She handed the plate back to Liz, who in turn passed it back to Jacob to set it on the table.

"I know Ben is-"

"My brother is a lot of things," Kelly laughed and they all heard Bruce snort his own laugh from where he was leaned against the doorframe leading to the hall.

"Ben hasn't had his head out of his ass in twenty years, but if Kelly asks him, he'll do whatever it takes. And he likes you, Liz."

"Even after everything?"

"Well we didn't send out a family announcement when you two had… problems," Kelly said delicately causing her daughter-in-law to smile tightly.

"And he blames me for the Cabal," Jacob said as he put the final plate on the table.

" _Blames you_ might be a bit much," Kelly tried and Liz's husband laughed outright at his mother.

"Your brother has never been my biggest fan."

"He felt like Jake didn't show the right level of gratitude when he helped connect us in getting his records sealed and pushing the adoption through," Bruce explained as they all took a seat, Hudson immediately sitting and hoping for scraps.

"I'm sorry I didn't properly bow at his feet," Jacob grumbled.

"Jacob," his mother warned.

Jacob flashed her a grin, leaning back a little in his chair. "I just wasn't sophisticated enough for him. It's fine."

"You pushed every button he had when he was trying to help you and you've done it every time you've seen him since."

Bruce leaned toward Liz conspiratorially and whispered, "He asked for it nearly every time, though."

"You're not helping," Kelly grumbled, but a smile was starting to perk. From everything Liz had known, her brother thought he was above all of them. "I'll talk to him, Jacob. If you want his help then you need to-"

"Fake it?"

She rolled her eyes and swatted at him, pulling a laugh from him as he raised his hands in mock surrender. "Best behavior. I promise. Just wait a few days because Liz and I will be tied up with a case."

The conversation turned in that direction and Jacob told them what he could. Liz found herself smiling at the exchange. It felt so normal and she forgot how much she missed it. It wasn't that they didn't see Kelly and Bruce, but Jacob's adoptive parents had tried to give them space to breathe after everything that had happened. Seeing them like this reminded her just what all she had gained and all she had come to love. For the first time since they had set the adoption appointment, Liz felt peace. Her husband was right. They were going to be okay.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Okay... I feel like I've fallen a bit behind in updates lately. I'm really sorry about that! Real life has been crazy and I've been trying to get this last arc in something like  order. Hopefully now that I have it mapped out that means things will move forward more smoothly in the writing process.

I know not everyone is part of the Tumblr community, but I just wanted to let you know that it's Keen2 Appreciation Week over there! Krism23 is putting it on. Even if you don't have a Tumblr account I highly suggest you pop over there and just search 'keen2week' in the tags in the search bar. It's been utterly fantastic so far!

Next time - Everything starts falling into place for the diamond heist op.


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter Forty-Nine**

It had taken several days, but Reddington had come through. He had indicated that urgent business would keep him from making the introduction personally, though, and Jacob wondered if that urgent business was really that or if he was simply pouting over the fact that they were going through with the adoption against his wishes. The younger man wouldn't put it past him.

By the time Reddington had reached back out to let them know that one of his associates could broker the meet in his place, Jacob had a full identity to work under that fit the skill set of a certain thief that was suspected to be part of the ring. The FBI had quietly picked up up and to take him out of the running. Jacob was rather fond of the alias he'd be working with, and it'd be good to get back into the field and undercover. Brian Kelley was a smooth talker with a quick hand and even quicker eye for knowing exactly what to pick off. His specialty was finding weakness in seemingly impenetrable security, and with the sudden disappearance of their man, the ring would be looking for someone just like Brian.

"It feels kind of strange running an op under my own name," Liz murmured as she looked over some of the documentation they had gathered on James Mallory.

"Your face was plastered all over the television screen," Samar said from her place. "It's not too far of a jump from there for certain circles to assume that, even if you were cleared, that you might continue in less than legal endeavors."

"I have to ask, Jake, is it kind of like riding a bike?" Ressler joked, making a reference to what they often referred to as Jacob's colourful youth and chuckling as the younger man smirked.

"Let me know when you find your wallet, okay?"

Ressler paused, checking his pocket and cursing. Jacob grinned broadly and tossed it to him. "Just like riding a bike. Yeah."

"There are times that I'm very glad you're on our side, Agent Phelps," Cooper said as he joined them in the bullpen.

"Could you imagine a world that I wasn't?" Jacob asked, his grin still lingering as he leaned back in his chair.

"I'd rather not. Where are we on this?"

"Reddington's out of town, but he's put us in touch with an associate Mr Vargas," Liz explained. "Jacob and I are meeting him at ten and he will make the introduction to Mallory who is, just like we thought, looking to replace a very specific type of thief."

"Brian Kelly is the name that Red gave him as a possibility, a thief known through his very public association with Masha Rostova," Jacob continued. "Liz and I will meet with Mallory, we'll show off a bit, and get ourselves hired."

"It was pretty public that you two are married," Aram pointed out. "Won't that make it tough to convince him you aren't working for the FBI?"

"Jacob's name and face was never put out there," Liz said. "And hey, guilty or not, public opinion has a way of passing judgement on high-profile cases. Without being able to find work, desperate times call for desperate measures and.. They don't know Jacob. They don't know he stood by my side in it."

Jacob blinked, the mirth washing away a little as he heard his wife speak about a way that it could have gone. She didn't seem bothered by it, but he knew an act when he saw it. They had spoken to Kelly's brother briefly and he had agreed to do some checking around for them, but there hadn't been any great hope in it. She had a job, a husband that loved her, and her freedom, but they certainly hasn't come away unscathed.

"And most normal agents aren't quite as quick to take a wallet," Ressler grumbled and Jacob winked at him.

"Don't be jealous of my skills, Ress."

Cooper snorted from his place. "You'll both be wearing trackers. That's nonnegotiable."

"These are not the type of people to screw around," Liz pointed out.

"Neither do we," Aram said cheerfully. "They're small trackers, designed to look like nicotine patches."

"I don't guess they really work, do they?" Liz asked with a teasing glance towards Jacob.

"I quit," he grumbled.

"How many times?"

"The point is that they don't stand out," Ressler cut in and Jacob shot him an appreciative look. "They'll let us keep up with you without having to tail close enough that we might blow your cover."

"Are we certain that Mallory is the ringleader?" Samar asked.

"Seems to be, or at least highly ranked," Jacob answered. "Supposedly he's the one this Vargas is connecting us with."

"We have one chance at this," Cooper warned.

"I'm good for it," Jacob said. "Promise."

Cooper offered him a half smile. "Wouldn't let you out in the field if I thought any different."

Jacob stood as everyone started to disperse, but the sound of his name had him turning to Aram who looked a little sheepish. "I, uh, heard that you and Liz were trying to adopt again."

The lines between work and life had been blurred for some time now. It wasn't surprising that others knew, but he really didn't want to have the conversation with anyone right then. "Yeah."

Aram swallowed, looking more awkward than usual. "I, uh, I'm sure you and Liz have a route to take, but I just wanted to let you know, in case everything has made it… difficult…"

"Aram, I need to get the last details sorted before Liz and I go to the meet."

"Right. Sorry. I just wanted to say, if the adoption agencies are… Well, if they won't work with you my sister has a friend in her graduate program that is thinking about giving up her baby. I just wanted to put it out there in case… I'm sorry if I overstepped."

Jacob was staring, the words slowly sinking in and the initial irritation waning. "No. Thank you. I'll talk to Liz about it."

Aram beamed. "I just think, after everything, you guys deserve a break. If I can help with that I will."

"You're a good friend, Aram. Thank you." He moved past him and towards his wife. They had to focus on the job, but after he could share what could have been a better break than they had dared hope for.

* * *

She didn't like the fact that Red wasn't making the introduction himself, but he had assured her that his business was urgent and unavoidable. He wouldn't have entrusted her safety to just anyone and Reddington didn't work with incompetent people. Liz just couldn't shake the feeling that this Mr Vargas was nervous. "Something wrong?" she asked sharply.

"No," Vargas answered immediate. "He's just late."

"By a whopping three minutes," Jacob countered, leaning against the alley wall.

Vargas glared at him. "Excuse me for being punctual, Mr Kelley."

Jacob snorted and Liz shot him a look. There was no reason to antagonise him.

A small noise drew their attention and Liz squared her shoulders as three figures appeared in the alley. She heard Jacob straighten and Vargas stepped forward. "Mr Mallory, thank you for meeting with-"

"Masha Rostova. How could I resist that? Rumour has it you were acquitted?"

Liz shrugged. "I had good backing."

"And why should I trust you? You married a fed."

"Ever heard of a long game? I understand you need someone that can get you past tough security."

"Right down to business," Mallory chuckled. He motioned to Jacob. "This him?"

"He's half of it. Brian and I ran a couple of of jobs back in the day."

"Two for the price of one?"

"Well, I wouldn't go that far," Liz answered with a charming smile, "but I'm sure we can come to some agreement."

Mallory smirked and looked over to Jacob. "I have some other options, you know. What makes you the one?"

Liz hadn't even seen her husband shift too much and she always had a good feeling for her surroundings. He offered Mallory a lazy smirk, though, and tossed him a cell phone. Mallory shot him a confused look until one of his bodyguards stepped forward, reaching for Jacob. "You slippery little bastard," he growled and Liz grinned.

"Because he's good."

Mallory chuckled. "Baker, back off. Only thing hurt is your pride." He tossed his man his phone back.

"Everyone and every security system has at least one blind spot. I can get through it," Jacob said confidently.

"Well then, looks like we're hiring two." He glanced over at Vargas and handed him an envelope. "Tell your boss we missed him, but appreciate his business as always."

"Of course," Vargas answered and turned to leave.

"So you'll be in touch with details?" Liz prompted and Mallory shook his head.

"No, you'll be meeting the crew now. Our backer for the job will want to meet you tonight."

"You still haven't said exactly what the job is," Jacob pressed.

Mallory smirked. "We're going to do the impossible. We're going to rob Reinder-de-Groot."

* * *

They had been shuffled into the back of a town car with windows so darkened that he could barely see through them. Jacob risked a glance at his wife who was sitting calmly and passively in her seat. She was a talented liar and they made quite a team undercover. He had just hoped to go home and talk over the adoption with her rather than go straight into the op.

Jacob shoved down the disappointment as the car pulled to a stop and Liz shot him a quick look and an even quicker smile before opening the door to slip out. Jacob followed, taking in their surroundings carefully and quietly. They were in an old warehouse, mostly abandoned except for the crew that stood bent over a table with schematics laid out. They looked up at their approach, but only one woman broke away from them.

She was tall and her blonde hair was streaked grey, falling against her shoulders in waves and framing her face. Blue eyes were already studying them and she frowned. "All we need is one," she said, her voice accented. Russian, Jacob was almost certain, though it was subtle. "He's more than we spoke about. I don't know him."

"He was the one that you were contacted about. I can vouch for him, and Reddington put us in touch," Liz said firmly.

"Yet he didn't show himself," the woman pointed out, her voice sharp.

"He's good. Proved it," Mallory said. "Listen, you and I have an arrangement. You get a hefty cut for backing the operation and I handle the details. Let me do the job you hired me for."

The woman turned sharp eyes on him and Jacob kept his expression relaxed. "We're up against Kerken, right? He's tough, but not impossible. His people are well trained, but if we run a diversion that makes him think he's in control-"

"You want Kerken to know you're there?" she asked suspiciously.

"Yes. He's a control freak. Let him think he's in control, but never lose it ourselves."

She watched him carefully and Jacob held her gaze, tilting his chin up a little.

"Brian and I have run something like it before," Liz said, drawing her attention. " A fake badge and a guilty party goes a long way for distraction."

"And you're willing to play that part?" Mallory asked.

"For our cut we'll play any part."

The woman smirked a little at that. "Natasha," she finally introduced, giving them both a brief nod, though she motioned to Liz. "A moment?"

Jacob caught his wife's eye before she moved to follow. He steeled himself. If this were any other op with any other partner, he wouldn't have flinched. All he could do was trust her.

* * *

Liz didn't like the idea of leaving the room without Jacob, but fighting it would have been asking for trouble. She followed Natasha back until she stopped, grabbing a bottle of water and tossing her one as well. After checking to make sure it was unopened, Liz twisted the top and took a drink.

"Masha Rostova. When your name came across I was hesitant. You're high profile right now."

"Only to some."

"You have your life back. Why risk it to steal a few diamonds?"

"It's more than a few diamonds," Liz countered with a smirk.

Natasha watched her carefully. "You painted quite the sympathetic story for yourself. A woman framed by a shadow organisation who just wanted to go home to her husband. A fed, as I understand it."

Liz squared her shoulders. "I had the weight of the FBI weighing down on me. I said what I needed to to survive. The man I married was a mark, just as I told Mallory."

"Yet you're still married to him?"

"What do you think I'm desperate enough to rob Geert Kerken for?" she snapped. "I want to start over. This life, everything that I've been forced into isn't me. I need out."

A small smile perked her lips. "And Raymond Reddington won't help you with that?"

"I don't know what sort of relationship you think I have with Reddington, but he never does anything without getting something for himself. I prefer taking care of myself."

Natasha nodded. "Very well then."

"Why do you care so much?"

"It's my money on the line. I need to know I can trust that you're as driven as you should be. What good are you if Kerken kills you before you finish the job."

"Good to know my value," Liz snorted.

"We're meeting tomorrow midday to finalise the plans. Until then."

Liz knew a dismissal when she heard one. She turned on her heel and moved back out into the main section. Jacob was seated with the guys, stretched out with his feet propped up on the table and looking more at home than he had a right to. He looked over at her, hands dancing as he told a story in his animated way, and he offered a grin. "And the rest can wait until tomorrow. Looks like our business is done tonight."

One of them glanced over and Liz felt his gaze up and down her. "You and her?"

Jacob winked suggestively and shrugged. "Woman married a fed. You imagine he's her type?"

She rolled her eyes. "Don't give them the impression that I have a type."

"Just a handsome face?" he laughed as he stood.

"Don't get ahead of yourself."

He followed her out of the front door, laughter echoing behind them and she didn't see the signs of him shaking the role until they were far away from the warehouse and both certain they they hadn't been tailed. Slowly she saw her husband replace Brian Kelley and his eyes softened just a little. "You gonna leave me for a more exciting life?" he teased, the words catching her a little by surprise.

"It's rarely boring with you, babe."

Jacob chuckled and have one last look around before wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close. She found herself sinking in, feeling a rush of peace. "I used to be really good at this," she breathed.

"You're still really good. If I didn't know you, you'd have had me convinced."

"Yeah?" she teased softly.

"Yeah, but your husband is awesome. You'd never leave him to go back to a life of crime. Especially when we might have finally found a way to adopt."

Liz stopped mid-step and Jacob flashed her a grin. "What? How? Did the social worker call? Did Ben call?"

His smile only grew. "Aram, of all people. His sister's friend is having a baby and is thinking about giving him or her up for adoption. I don't know the details, but he mentioned it."

"And he would…?" She swallowed hard and Jacob eased her forward towards their home as he pulled a key from his pocket.

"Sounded like it. Let me check in with the Post Office real fast."

She nodded and watched him pull his phone from his pocket and Hudson whined at her feet. Liz bent down to scratch him behind the ears, the sound of her husband's voice from the other room filling her ears as she finally took a seat on the floor. They were going to have a baby. After everything they were going to have a child together.

"So Cooper wants us in early to-"

Liz didn't let him finish before she had stood, crossed the space to where Jacob had been standing to catch her up, and she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his lips. She felt her husband freeze for half a beat after they finally parted before he chuckled softly, pulling her into a hug kissing the side of her head. "You gotta tell me what I did so I can do it again," he teased her.

"We're going to be parents," she breathed.

"Babe, slow down. It's…. A lot of things have to go right."

She shook her head. "No. We are. We're going to, Jacob. You and me. I think your positivity is wearing off on me a little, but-"

He grinned at her and kissed her again. "I love you."

"Love you too." She wrapped her arms around his middle, pulling him as close as she could. She couldn't explain it, but there wasn't even a question. This was it. They stood like that for a long moment and for the first time in so long, Liz felt truly at peace.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: This past week was insanely busy, but it was also Keen2 week, so my free time was spent enjoying the fantastic posts people were making over on Tumblr. I really want to do it again very soon. It was a breath of fresh air to focus on the positive.

The next chapter is the 50th chapter! I never would have thought that this story would have exploded like it has. I'm very happy with the direction this final arc is going. I don't want to say too much, because I don't want to spoil it, but does anyone have any predictions after meeting some of the people you've met in this chapter?

Next time - Liz finds a photo of her mother at Red's apartment, the Phelps' prepare for the heist, and Reddington receives a visitor.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter Fifty**

"I don't have a problem with my memory, you know," Liz said as she stood from the couch. Reddington had come back into town and had asked to see her between the debriefing at the Post Office and their meeting with Natasha and Mallory. He had dropped a less than subtle remark about the Phelps' adoption plans just a few minutes after she arrived. He thought he was helping, she supposed, and he did seem more agitated than usual.

"I never said that you did, Lizzie."

She moved over to the bookshelf, looking through the volumes and titles. This place was so different than any other she had been to. It looked… real. There were photos and pieces of memories littered across the shelves. She ran her fingers along the spines of the books, reading titles as she spoke. "Could have fooled me. You know I'm not looking for your approval. If you think I am, you'll be disappointed."

"You have very much made your own way in life, Lizzie," he murmured almost sadly.

She resisted the urge to shake her head. It wasn't like prying directly was going to change his mind about telling her what he was to her. She was quickly proving her persistent nature though. They were supposed to meet down the street at a coffee shop when she had shown up at the front door of his weird little apartment. It was a matter of time. Layer by layer she would pull it back until she found the truth. If her time as an operative had taught her anything, it was patience. "You had something you wanted to discuss?"

"Just to see how the meet went."

She hummed softly to herself. "You could have called for that."

"If you didn't want to come all you had to do was say."

"I just want to know the real reason I'm here. That's all. Checking up on me, Red?" she teased, turning to look at him, but her eyes caught sight of a photo on the shelf she hadn't gotten to yet. They focused in in a little girl sitting on a woman's lap in a swing. She looked so happy, so innocent, that it took Liz a moment to recognize herself as a small child. She turned to Red who was keeping his expression carefully schooled. "Who is this woman?"

He swallowed hard, moving towards her in a careful way. "That is Katarina Rostova."

"My mother," Liz breathed, her thumb running across the glass protecting the photo. "Why is her face washed out?"

"It always has been. It's the only photo I still have of Katarina."

"Were you ever going to show this to me?"

"Perhaps. I hadn't decided." He sighed heavily. "Your mother was… complicated, Lizzie."

"If there's even a chance she's still alive…"

He leveled a serious look at her and when he spoke, Liz felt her breath catch dangerously. "I will tell you this: if you and Jacob truly want a child, if you want a family as you say you do, you will stay as far away from Katarina Rostova as possible."

* * *

"They won't give us a chance to leave once plans are finalised," Jacob explained, motioning to the plans he had drawn up from memory. "I got these while we were chatting. For thieves, it's amazing what gets past them." His partner shot him a surprised look, but shook his head and took the offered plans. "So, things may change, but I'm guessing we'll be hitting tonight. It makes the most sense. Kerken still being an ass about it?"

"He still thinks he has security covered," Ressler huffed.

"And for anyone else he might, but this is good. I'd kind of like to get this bastard as well if we can."

"Do not get yourself executed just to bring him in," his partner sighed.

"That's a little extreme," Jacob acknowledged.

"Death? Yeah. That's extreme. No coming back from it."

"Little permanent for my taste," the younger man chuckled, turning back to the agents they had been briefing before they had been sidetracked by their own humour. "We'll have you guys set up here and here. One team with Agent Ressler, one with Agent Navabi. Liz and I are going to be on the inside, so we'd really appreciate it if you didn't catch us in any crossfire."

"Meaning we're going to keep crossfire to a minimum," Ressler clarified and Jacob shrugged.

"You'll want to go ahead and make sure to arrest both of us. It doesn't need to be traced back that our source provided two undercover feds or he won't be useful moving forward. Make sure Mallory sees at least one of us arrested."

The lift doors opened, drawing their attention as Liz strode in, and Ressler cleared his throat. "That's it. We're on standby until we know when this is going down for sure."

"He has to be one of the most _infuriating_ men I've ever met," Liz growled as she stormed over to the table. "He has a photo of my mother in his apartment."

"You found the place then?" Jacob asked, shuffling the papers and schematics into a neater pile.

"Yeah. Him too." She snorted, running a hand through her dark hair and Jacob caught it, pulling it to his lips. She was frustrated and it was boiling over at the wrong time. His wife was even better than he was at compartmentalising things, so for this to bubble up when she had been so even keeled about it meant something had hit a raw nerve. She huffed and looked up at him. "This isn't the time," she acknowledged softly.

"We can talk about it if you need to. I don't want you to be-"

"I'm good. I'm not distracted. Just pissed. He wasn't going to tell me and I just need to accept that."

"We'll work through it," he promised.

"I'm going to get to the bottom of this," she swore fiercely and then pulled in a steadying breath. "After. After we bring them in. Where are we at?"

"Got everyone lined up and we'll be waiting for yours and Jake's signal," Ressler said, glancing over as if he were looking for a confirmation this wasn't going to blow up in their faces.

Jacob offered a half smile and motioned to his wife to step to the side. "You get a good look at her face?"

"It was washed out. I mean, you could see a little of it, her smile, really, but…"

"Not enough to jolt a memory?"

She bit her lip, looking down as she chewed on it. "I don't remember her. At all. I mean, I recognized myself. That was it."

"You were really young, Liz," he reminded her softly.

She looked up at him. "You remember your biological mother, right? You were younger than I was."

"I have really scattered memories and not many of those. She wasn't exactly the best person, Liz. Sometimes… Sometimes your brain does you a favour by shutting it out. Sometimes it's the only way to move past it."

"I don't want my brain to do me a favour, Jacob. I want to know who my mother really was. Bud said she left me to die. Red said she loved me, but then turns around and says things like if we ever want to have a family I should never look for her. I just… At least you know your biological parents aren't worth looking for. I don't. I don't know, and how am I supposed to be a mom if-"

He pulled her in close, wrapping his arms around her. "You're spiralling, babe."

Jacob felt her nod against him and she hugged him back. "I need to know."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Well your husband _does_ work for the FBI. We can look quietly."

"There's so much going on-"

"Do you want to look or not?"

She blinked hard. "I don't know."

He offered her a quirked smile and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you. If you want to look, we'll look. If you don't, we won't. You and me… we're not our biological parents, right?"

It was something she had told him again and again when they had first started the adoption process. He wasn't where he came from. He was more than his past or the issues it brought with it. Now, finally, he could support her in the same way.

Liz smiled slowly. "I love you too."

"Oh good," he chuckled and kissed her. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he checked it, holding it up so she could read the text. "Looks like we're going to go steal some diamonds."

She laughed. "Never thought you'd say that to me, did you?"

"Kinda glad I can," he answered with a playful wink. It had been a roller coaster, but they were stronger for it, and if he was going into a dangerous undercover op like this one, there was something about having the woman he loved watching his back that left him with a strange sort of peace. They were a team, and no matter what they faced, they could do that together.

* * *

She was stubborn. Not that she didn't come by it naturally, but it was a trait that would eventually hurt her. He had looked for her so long, worried about what had happened, and now that he was in her life he still couldn't protect her. It was maddening.

Dembe thought he should tell her everything. About the night of the fire and the fact that he knew, now beyond a shadow of a doubt, that her mother was alive. Katarina had staged her death when Reddington had told her that her little girl died in that fire. He had lived with the guilt that he had driven her to it, but he hadn't felt he had a choice. Her desperate need to be near her child without giving up the life as a spy that had become increasingly more dangerous as they moved at odds with the Cabal had left Lizzie's life in the crosshairs. Katarina's lover, the little girl's father, certainly hadn't helped matters. No child deserved to live that way, nor die the way that she would have. The way Katarina thought she had. He would have told her the girl had died even if the plan to take her to Sam Milhoan had worked out.

Red sighed deeply. It had been for the best at the time, no matter how it had pained him. He couldn't risk Katarina searching for her as well. She would have led the Cabal straight to Elizabeth and to the Fulcrum. They would have likely killed the little girl to get what they wanted. But now… Now he didn't know how to warn her without divulging his part in why she had grown up as she had: without love or affection. It was his fault in the end, and as much as she argued that she would forgive him for the things that he could not forgive himself, he knew that some things could never be forgiven. That they should never be forgiven.

"You're a difficult man to track down, Raymond."

Reddington spun around, strangely startled by the voice he hadn't expected in a place that no one but a select few knew about. The figure was familiar, even if it had been over two decades since he had seen her. "I have powerful enemies," he answered, keeping his voice steady.

"More than a few," she agreed, moving out of her shadowy corner and into the room. Reddington shifted on the couch, watching her carefully as she surveyed the surroundings in a way that reminded him of how Elizabeth had done the very same. "Though fewer now that you've taken our former employer to their knees."

"I was never employed by the Cabal, Katarina. You were." He watched her carefully, trying to gauge how much he should tell her.

Katarina looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "Is that the lie you've told yourself so long that you've finally started believing it? You were as much their dog as I was. She was no safer with you."

"She would have been," he growled, feeling an old anger boil. "If you had truly loved her, you would have let me keep her safe. From the Cabal, from Erik, and from you. They're weakened, not gone. You and I both know she's in danger as long as there's enough of them left to-"

Katarina Rostova bristled. "Don't sound so high and mighty, Raymond. This was _always_ about Erik for you. Your jealousy-"

"It was about _Elizabeth_."

She snorted. "Your lies come so easily, don't they?

"You made your choices and I made mine," he answered tightly.

"Yes. To keep my child from me."

"I did what I did to save her."

"And how did that work out, Ray? Was she safer alone? Was she safer growing up with Erik's death hanging over her?"

Reddington did his best to keep his expression neutral, but apparently it wasn't good enough. Realization flashed through her gaze. "She doesn't know."

"She disappeared from the fire, Kat," Reddington said softly. She could always tell when he was lying anyway. "She was picked up after that and off my radar for a long time. She didn't remember me or… anything prior to being put through the foster system. She still doesn't, and it's best that way. She's happy, Katarina."

"Is she?"

"She will be. She's strong." He stood slowly, finding her turning to him, and his voice softened. "I've spent time with her. Quite a bit of it recently and… I don't see Erik in her eyes." He wasn't sure if that would be a source of comfort or pain for her. Katarina had loved the man desperately. More than she had ever loved Red himself, even if neither had ever quite been able to let go of each other. It had been a mess by the end.

Katarina's own expression eased just a little and Red saw the woman he'd loved. She turned towards the door. "You always did love her as your own. It could have turned out better than this."

"You were never going to leave him and he tied you to the Cabal," Red said tightly.

"Would you have left your wife?" She smiled. "You see the corner we put ourselves in. Now Erik is gone and you hate me."

"Katarina-"

She offered him a sad smile, moving towards him and touching his face. He leaned into it on impulse, the touch pulling at feelings long buried under regret and guilt. She tipped up on her toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "There's a reason you don't see Erik in her, Ray, and that could have mattered more once, but it can't now. Not after what you did. I won't lose her. Not again. Even if have to fight you for her. Now, I have some business to attend to."

She left him standing there, her words hanging in the air long after the door closed behind her.

* * *

For a woman determined to be in the middle of everything, Liz was a little surprised by the lateness of Natasha's arrival. She almost made them late to the job itself, but she strode in without batting an eye, directing everyone where she wanted them and leaving Mallory looking a bit irked in the way that she took on his job. Liz risked a glance at her husband who was talking with the driver about his forged FBI badge. Well, mostly forged.

"Masha."

Liz looked around, the name startling her just a little. Natasha took a seat on the edge of the table where Liz was cleaning her gun and offered a smile. The expression caught her by surprise. "How well do you know your partner?"

"Brian? Well enough. We worked several jobs before I took the one I'm in now."

"The one you want out of?"

Liz shrugged. "It's time." She shifted. "Listen, if you don't trust me-"

"It's not you. It's him." Her gaze drifted over.

"He's a grifter. You're not supposed to trust him."

Natasha chuckled at that. "But you do?"

A small smile played on Liz's lips as she started putting her gun back together. "I get him. We have similar backgrounds. Rough upbringings."

"Well, I wouldn't put all your trust into him. After this is all over, if things go well, I might have a permanent position for you if you're interested."

Liz blinked. "I didn't get the impression that you ran with these guys every time."

"I don't. I'll move on. Things bore me easily, but I imagine you feel the same."

"I don't need a new handler. I cut that out of my life when I broke ties with McCready."

"I'm sure you did, but that's not what I was referring to."

"Then what?"

"A partnership."

Liz snorted. "You don't know anything about me beyond what you read in the papers."

"I may know more than you think," Natasha said simply and stood. "I don't need your answer now. Just think about it. Consider it. The offer stands."

"I'll think about it," Liz promised, her mind trying to place the smile she hadn't seen before. It was odd and strangely familiar.

Natasha moved to speak to Mallory and Liz felt a hand on her shoulder, Jacob behind her when she looked. "What's up?"

"She just offered me a permanent gig."

"She just met you."

"That's what I said."

Jacob hummed softly to himself. "You going to leave me for some smooth talking Russian spook?" he teased and gave her a wink. "Come on. We're ready to go."

Liz sat there for a moment longer, her eyes going wide as she watched her. She knew where she recognized her from.

* * *

"There's been a change of plans," Natasha said as they pulled to the drop point where the van would be waiting with the thieves for the signal.

"No," Mallory growled. "No last second changes. That's how we get ourselves killed. Kerken doesn't screw around."

"Neither do I," Natasha answered. "And that's why we're changing it. Masha will go in with the rest of you and I will accompany Mr Kelley in."

Jacob snorted. "You're hilarious. No. Masha and I have a routine. We're not changing it up last second just to get a bullet in our heads from Kerken."

"Let me be blunt, Mr Kelley, I don't trust you."

"Great. I don't trust you either, lady. Could be why I'm not willing to put my life in your hands." Jacob leaned forward, his gaze hard. "Your people brought me in to do a job. Let me do my damn job or I walk."

He could feel Liz tense a little at his side as he held Natasha's steely gaze with his own. Finally she loosed a breath. "Fine."

"Fine," he snapped back before slipping out of the car and circling around. Something about Natasha didn't set well with him. She was obviously wealthy, but she refused to sit on the sidelines. Her fascination with Liz made him more than a little nervous. Well, at least he would be able to put her behind bars shortly and that worry would be over.

Liz was already in place as he entered, and Jacob spotted Samar who appeared to be looking at a particularly expensive diamond necklace. He stepped close enough to speak quietly so they wouldn't be noticed. "Around back is a van, Maryland license plates, guy with a beard driving. It's him, two heavyweights, Mallory, and a woman named Natasha. She's the money."

"Are you certain you want to play with fire today?" she asked, never looking at him.

"Taking them all down is the best move," he told her as she slipped him an earpiece. "I'll give the signal when Liz and I are ready."

"Don't get yourselves killed."

"Do our best," he promised and turned, setting the piece in his ear carefully. If everything went to plan, Liz should be getting herself caught right about-

"Miss, I'm going to need to see what you just slipped in your pocket."

"Get your hands off me," Liz argued, pulling back as a man with a security jacket reached for her. She slammed him hard and started for the door. Well, no turning back now.

Jacob sidestepped, cutting her off and grabbing her by the shoulders. He spotted Kerken coming from the back of the store, his expression focused, and he waved his hand. "Thank you. We have this."

"Actually, we do," Jacob answered, pulling the fake ID from his pocket. "Brian Kelley, FBI. We've been tracking a team of thieves."

Kerken frowned. "Yes, so I've heard."

"You have some place in the back we can question her?" Jacob asked, shooting Kerken a look that the older man read well.

"Of course."

Jacob kept a hand on her shoulder as Liz struggled, following to the back. Ressler would be there at any moment, ready to take Klerken down as well at the first sign that the man was going to lash out.

The gunshot was muffled as they stepped in the back room and Klerken fell dead to the ground. The guard with them went next and Jacob found the barrel pointed at him next. "Release her."

"Woh," Jacob said as he raised his hands. "What the hell, Natasha? This was all going to plan before you shot them."

" _Your_ plan," she growled. "The feds just took the van."

"What?" Liz demanded. "Natasha, we had nothing-"

"You had everything to do with it, Masha. You and your fed husband, but my offer still stands. Walk away from this with me."

"Or what? You'll shoot us both?"

Natasha's expression tensed so briefly that Jacob almost missed it. "Just him."

Liz stepped in front of him. "I know you came here for me," she said, "but I won't let you kill the only man I've ever loved."

Jacob reached for his gun tucked into his holster at the small of his back, ready to even the odds before Natasha decided Liz wasn't worth the trouble. He used the distraction he thought Liz was trying to provide to pull the gun around, but his wife knocked his arm to the side without warning, throwing the shot wide. "What the hell?" he demanded,

Liz turned to him with wide eyes and pleading as she grabbed hold of him to stop him from chasing the woman down. "Jacob, _please_!"

He turned towards her, uncertain. "What the hell, Liz?"

"I knew I recognized her and I figured out where right before we left."

He gave her a questioning look. "You just let one of the key suspects-"

"The photo in Red's apartment," she cut him off and Jacob blinked hard as he realized what she meant.

"Natasha is Katarina Rostova?"

Liz nodded. "She's my mother."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: So I feel like chapter fifty is kind of a big deal. I'm so excited to be able to share this chapter with you. A lot of exciting things happened and it sets up for a lot of exciting things to come. Who wants to make a guess: Is Katarina a good guy, bad guy? Somewhere in the middle?

I hope you guys are still enjoying this ride as much as I am. I'm always so happy to hear from you!

Next time - Reddington tries to regain at least some control in a situation that has the potential to spiral out of his control while the Phelps' choose each other.


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter Fifty-One**

Liz was silent during the debrief, speaking only when she had to. She could feel the weight of the choice her husband made as he explained that Natasha had slipped away after killing Klerken, but left out the part about Liz letting her escape. He wasn't happy, she knew, but at least he had her back.

They were in the car and on their way home before he loosed a breath and she saw his hands tighten just a little against the steering wheel.

"Just say it," she huffed, ready to get the fight over and done with. She hated fighting with him. She hated the words that were said and the tempers that flared, always regretted afterwards. At this point, though, she would take cutting words over crushing silence.

"You don't want to hear it," he warned as he took a turn towards their home.

"You're pissed."

"Of course I'm pissed, Liz. You let a woman go that killed two people in front-"

"She's my _mother_ , Jacob," she snapped. "Just because you have no interest in looking for your biological parents doesn't mean I feel the same way."

"You let a woman we _know_ is a part of this go because you _think_ she _might_ be Katarina Rostova," Jacob answered as he pulled in along the street next to their town house. He turned, his expression a mixture of exhaustion and something she couldn't quite place. "Lizzie, I know you're scared of bringing a kid into our lives. I am too, and I know you feel like you need to find her to answer questions, but you can't jump at every shadow."

Jacob slipped out of the jeep and Liz followed, her temper beginning to flair. How stupid did he think she was? "Is that what you think this is? Some desperate reach?"

Her husband snorted as he fished his keys out of his pocket. "What did you recognize her from, Liz? A picture you told me completely washed out her face?"

"I could see her smile. This is not me blindly hoping."

Jacob sighed heavily as he pushed the door open, but neither of them missed the unusual quiet that met them. It was late, but Hudson always greeted them. Liz saw him reach for his gun and her fingers wrapped around her own. The argument was put immediately aside as the two moved into their home, guns drawn and ready for whatever waited for them. They moved through, Jacob taking a left through the living room while Liz inched her way down the hallway to clear the bottom floor before they risked the upstairs.

The back door opened through the kitchen and Liz's gun jerked up, ready to shoot, as Raymond Reddington raised his hands as if he were surrendering. At his side trotted a very happy looking Hudson, having apparently spent time out in the side yard. "What has Jacob told you about breaking into our home, Red? I could have shot you," she grumbled, putting the gun away. "It's just Red."

Jacob cursed down the hall, moving into the kitchen through the dining room. "Seriously? How many times?"

"Perhaps if your wife would answer the phone…" Reddington murmured, waving the threats off.

Liz bristled a little at that. "We were on assignment. It happens. What do you need?"

Her husband circled around, bending down to scratch Hudson behind the ears, and never took his eye off of Red. Reddington, for his part, didn't switch his gaze from Liz. "Have you been contacted by anyone out of the normal recently?"

"Why?"

"This is important, Elizabeth."

"Like who? We've been on assignment. We talked to a bunch of people we wouldn't have normally."

"We?" Reddington echoed, swiveling to look at Jacob like he'd forgotten that he was there at all.

"Tell us who we're looking for and we can give you more information, Reddington," Jacob offered, but for the look Red gave him someone would have thought that he'd told him to get out again.

"Trust, Red. Give it to get it," Liz reminded.

The Concierge of Crime frowned deeply, looking as if he were weighing his options. "When your name became public - when _Masha Rostova_ became public - certain people would have heard."

"The Cabal has gone to ground," Jacob said as he moved over to the fridge, pulling three beers from it.

Red turned his nose up and waved it off. "It's weakened, not gone."

"So who?" Liz pressed. If she had learned anything since Raymond Reddington had come into her life, it was that he liked to lead people in a direction and let them come to conclusions that suited his needs, even if those conclusions weren't entirely true. It wasn't that he necessarily lied to her, but the truth was fluid with him. Blind trust was a fool's errand.

He looked at her for a long moment before sighing. "I told you that if you wanted this family that you are both so desperate for to stay away from the search for Katarina. You may no longer have a choice."

"She's contacted you," Liz murmured. Interesting.

"And she's looking for you."

"You have to give us more to work from than that," Jacob said from his place.

"For Elizabeth's safety-"

"You don't get to decide what keeps me safe, Red. I do," Liz snapped. "Until you get that, until you understand that this _thing_ you and I have needs to be a partnership or nothing at all, you need to stop giving me half truths and partial explanations. You want me to believe my mother is dangerous. Fine. You tell me what I don't know, but if you're not going to tell me all of it, don't bother." Her voice was controlled, but she felt all the frustration boiling up under it. How was she supposed to trust him if she constantly felt like a marionette being yanked around on a set of strings of his choosing?

"I might put more weight in that if you were to give me the same," Reddington responded.

"That's the thing, Red, if you'd be straight with me from the beginning then I'd be able to be honest with you. You first, and I'd be more than happy to tell you what I know."

He watched her carefully for a long moment before loosing a long breath. "There may be a day, Elizabeth, that you understand that there are simply some things better left in the dark."

"I've lived in the dark too long," she answered. "It's time to put everything on the table, but you have to take that first step, Red."

He frowned a little at her. "I'll be in touch if you need me. Please don't do anything foolish."

"You either."

She watched him turn with a sinking feeling deep within her. She had promised to forgive him, but she couldn't do that until he was honest with her. She had done enough things to know that just because Katarina was involved in a heist didn't make her a threat to her family. The lies were a bigger threat now, and even worse, the burying of knowledge. She wasn't a woman that could let herself be protected. Not blindly.

"What do you need?"

Liz turned, finding her husband standing quietly, the fight that had been boiling earlier set aside. "I need you to trust me," she managed. She needed him, above anyone else, to have faith in her.

Jacob stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her and Liz leaned in, feeling him press a kiss to the side of her head. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yep," he answered.

"Even with the assignment?"

"They don't need to know everything," Jacob murmured. "We'll figure it out. I just know that you're more important than any job."

She turned and wrapped her arms around him, feeling him hold her close. "Thank you."

"Let's get some sleep, huh? We'll figure it out in the morning."

Liz nodded and he released her long enough to allow his hand to slip down into hers, wrapping around it and she felt a steadiness take hold. In her life she had trusted the wrong people, distrusted the wrong people, and everything in between, but Jacob had always been the right choice. With him she felt steady and loved, even if they were frustrated with each other. She followed her husband up the stairs, her hand warm in his, and she knew if nothing else remained, they would. The world could crash down around them, but they would stand together through it all.

* * *

His patience had paid off. Finally. The call that Red received after leaving the Phelps home late that night was one that he had been waiting on for months. He had been slowly gathering people to his side after his initial chat with Laurel Hitchin. She was his first, of course, as he had already proven that he could take her organization to its knees. If he chose, at any time, he could deal the finishing blow.

"You'll forgive the late call," Hitchin said as she entered the space Reddington had chosen for them to meet. "His people contacted me and I reached out to you."

"It's good you did," Reddington answered, leaning back in his chair and placing the book he had been flipping through on his knee. Reading it might have been a stretch, but there was no reason for her to know that. "Tell me, what did Mr DuPont wish to speak about?"

"He wouldn't say, only that he wanted to set a meet." Hitchin moved to take a seat with the Concierge of Crime and immediately went for the scotch in the decanter and the empty glass waiting. It had become something of a ritual when they met. One called, the other set the place and provided a bit of something to take the edge off. He would have much rathered had these meetings with Alan Fitch, but if they must be had, he supposed they could have been worse than all of this.

"Well, isn't he presumptuous," Reddington chuckled, "to think that _I_ want to meet with _him_."

"Don't you?" Hitchin asked a little hesitantly.

"My business is information, Ms Hitchin. Surely you know that by now. I want every ounce of information on this man before I set a meeting point and time."

"Our people have been trying, but-"

"But you don't want to push too hard because you're still trying to straddle a line and look for a winner," Reddington said pointedly, and held a hand up when she started to argue. "No, no, Laurel. Don't insult my intelligence. You've been in survival mode for quite a while now, though it's past time for you to pick a side."

"I have."

"Have you? Then prove it. My people are closing in on his financial information, his business partners, and every minute detail on how he conducts his business. He's a truly fascinating man, Laurel, but I suggest that you get me something that my own people can't before I meet with him or you will cease to be useful to me. Heaven knows I can find much better company to set my meetings and drink my scotch."

She stared at him, the meaning behind his words abundantly clear. He watched her weigh them for a moment before pulling in a deep breath, nodding, and reaching into her bag to pull out a tablet. It read her thumb print and flickered to life. "The one thing you can't get is his face," she said, her voice steadier than he would have expected. "His business is one thing. I've known for some time that your people were looking into that. There's no reason to double up the efforts and waste time, so my focus has been a bit more personal."

Reddington snorted and reached over. "You think a man's face will-" His breath caught dangerously the the blurred figure looking back at him. He knew it. It had been many, many years, but it was a face he would never forget. That he _could_ never forget.

"It's not common knowledge," Hitchin huffed. "The fact that he wants to meet with you at all is rare. He doesn't show his face to anyone."

He gave a small sound of affirmation. "There's a pier just off of the Gaylord National Resort. Find a time and clear it with me, though I want it during the day. Have our side ready."

"Reddington-"

"If you want to survive this, Laurel, I suggest you choose the right side. This will only end with this man or myself dead, and if there's one thing that I have proven it's that I'm a survivor. Set the damn meet."

* * *

Steam poured out of the shower as Katarina Rostova opened the door, a towel wrapped around her body and she stepped out onto the mat on the tile. She grabbed for a smaller towel, running it across her newly dark hair and offered a smile as she moved into the bedroom. "Hello, Raymond." It wasn't a social visit, but at least the pistol on his knee wasn't aimed. It was a show. It was always a show with him.

"I always preferred you blonde," her former lover murmured thoughtfully.

"It's not always about what you prefer," she answered as she moved to her suitcase, pulling an oversized shirt from it and letting the towel drop so that she could slip it around her shoulders.

"You made it quite clear that it was _never_ about what I preferred."

"Don't be sour, Ray. Someone had to make sure your ego didn't go entirely unchecked." She turned, nimble fingers working on the buttons as she watched him watching her. It was strange. She hadn't spoken to Raymond Reddington for years before that call. She'd been so angry at him when she had made it, but now, as he sat in her hotel room with a gun balanced with one hand and his fedora held loosely in the other, it was like no time had passed at all. They were a little older, but that did tend to happen. She offered him a small, genuine smile. "I told you those hats were going to cause you more trouble than they were worth," she teased lightly.

He tilted his head a little and she could see him trying to keep his composure. After a moment he began to chuckle. "You're not going to make me shoot you, are you, Kat?"

"I suppose that depends on what you're here for."

"A little honesty. I think we owe one another that, don't we?"

She watched him carefully, noting the tiredness that has worked its way in, and nodded very slowly. "You told me she was dead, Ray," Katarina managed.

Reddington frowned. "When I told you that, I wasn't sure. She was gone, Kat. After everything, I couldn't protect her."

Katarina felt her temper flare. "And you took her."

He laid his gun to the side on the table, covering it with his hat. The look he wore was one that she knew well. "You and I both know that it had turned too dangerous to keep her in Moscow. The Soviet Union was collapsing and Erik was on edge. He's dangerous on a good day, Kat, but the Russian government was imploding around him and the Cabal was pressuring him from the other end."

"So you thought it would be a good idea to take Masha, the Fulcrum, and run? Without telling me?" she growled at him, moving over to a table across the room to pour two drinks.

Reddington stood. "You wouldn't have come with me and-"

"You never asked!" she snapped and whirled at him. "You want honesty, Raymond? Why don't you try a bit? Do you really expect me not to believe that you didn't even suspect that she was yours when you took her?"

"Don't play games with me now, Katarina," he hissed and she saw that calm cracking. "You know how I feel about Lizzie. _I_ was the one that convinced you to keep her. _I_ was the one that treated her as my own, but you made no qualms over the fact that she was very much Erik's child-"

"I never said so!"

"And you never said differently!"

"Because what good would it have done? Would you have loved her more? Could you have? You're right, Ray. You were there for her, you loved her in ways Erik never could, but would you have left your family for us or would you have simply taken my child from me?" Her calm was completely broken now and Reddington, for all of his own composure, stared at her. He had loved that child, Katarina had never questioned it, but he had loved Carla and Jennifer as well. If she had told him, if she had ever admitted it, she would have needed to leave with him. She was good at what she did, but Erik would have killed Masha. She would have had to go with him and he would have had to give up his family. That, or she would have had to give up Masha. "You did take my child from me, Ray, and then you lost her."

His gaze hardened. "You brought Erik and the rest of the Cabal to my doorstep. Don't you dare try to tell me he followed you, Kat. No one finds you without you wanting them to. The last twenty-five years have proven _that_. She was lost in a fire that maniac you love-"

"I loved _you_! She was yours and I would have chosen you if _you_ gave me half the chance!"

Reddington sat back down hard as if she had physically struck him, the truth hanging between them after so long. She shoved it aside as best as she could. "You and I can save her now, Ray, but we both know the Cabal isn't finished. I've done some digging."

"Then you know he didn't die that night," her former lover breathed.

"He'll want her back now that he knows where she is. He was always possessive that way."

Reddington swallowed hard. "Does he know?" he asked, his voice still cracking a little.

"He will as soon as he sees her, Ray. You're right. There's nothing of him in her."

"She won't leave. She thinks she can live a normal life here. A husband, a child. I've tried to warn her away, but…" He offered her a weak smile. "I couldn't tell her."

"You thought Erik was dead and she had killed him. You were protecting her," Katarina murmured, moving to perch on the arm of his chair. "Now _we_ can protect her."

He looked up at her and she could tell that's not what he had come there for. Likely he hadn't even known. They had always had a terrible blind spot with each other.

"If this can be done without her knowledge, that would be best. I've done what I can to explain the dangers, but she's determined."

"That husband of hers doesn't help matters," Katarina huffed. "A fed, Raymond. Our daughter married a fed."

He chuckled. "He is… a bit unconventional, which sometimes works for us, sometimes against."

"We'll see," she murmured softly. He had been quick and clever in the heist, but she had spotted him. He may have passed Reddington's tests, but he hadn't quite finished with her own. She needed to be sure. Nothing could be left to chance.

Blue eyes caught hers. "She does love him, Kat. You know how that goes."

She offered him a sad smile before standing from her perch, circling around the chair, and leaning down, pressing her lips against his. His kiss was familiar, even after so long. There was something comforting in the way he pulled her closer, his hands never allowing her to lose balance as they moved. Finally they broke, both a little breathless, and she lingered there, inches away from him. "When you love someone, there's no control."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I weighed this arc back and forth so much when I was coming close to it, but I'm glad that I decided to go with it. I have no idea if we'll get any real answers about Katarina this season, but this is an AU, so even if the show completely blows a few theories of mine out of the water, at least I will have been able to indulge them here.

If you haven't checked it out yet SaraBeth1's and my Tessler storry Unlikely Allies, please do over on my page. I have it up there and on Tumblr. We had a lot of fun with it and there's some great bromance moments!

Next time - Jacob and Liz meet the friend of Aram's that may be willing to let them adopt her child, the Ressler family gets some downtime with the Phelps', and Katarina tests her daughter's husband in a dangerous way.


	53. Chapter 53

**Chapter Fifty-Two**

He wasn't sure why there had to be so many people involved. He, Liz, and the mother of the baby should be enough, but as soon as the meeting had been coordinated through Aram, Ben had hopped on a flight from New York down to DC. No amount of protesting on Jacob's part seemed to deter him. That would have been bad enough if Aram and his sister - whose friend they were supposed to be meeting with - hadn't made plans to show up too. With very little warning. The last thing Jacob had wanted was for a co-worker to get a first-hand view of his oh-so-charming Uncle Ben.

It had gone smoother than he had expected, though it might take him a while to fully admit that. The girl was nice, smart, and best of all, seemed to like both of them. Liz's nerves had calmed to the point that she had reached out to take his hand under the table halfway through one of Kelly's brother's remarks and held him steady until the end.

Now they sat a little to the side, waiting for Ben to finish his business call before they drove him back to Kelly and Bruce's home. Liz leaned against his shoulder. "What'd you think?"

"I think she liked us, but I'm not sure she's one hundred percent ready to give her kid up either."

His wife sat up straighter now, her hand not leaving his. "You saying not to get my hopes up?"

"I wouldn't say that," Aram said as he approached, drawing the couple's attention. "Sorry. Sorry, I just-"

"No, what is it?" Liz pressed.

"Well, Dani's taking Molly home, but Molly seems to really like you guys. She wouldn't stop about what kind of parents you would be and how solid you two are. She, uh, seems to think that with everything that happened it was really romantic you two stood by each other." Aram ducked his head. "She's, uh-"

Liz laughed and reached forward. "You too, huh?" she teased with a wink and Aram looked half terrified to give a truthful answer, which only made Liz grin more. "You're in good company, Aram. I think he's pretty romantic for sticking with me."

Now she was just going for a reaction from him. Jacob rolled his eyes as his wife leaned over and pressed a kiss to his scruffy cheek. "I'm just stubborn," he chuckled and Aram laughed.

"Well, whatever it is, she wants to go forward. I mean, that's what she told Dani and me anyway. I may have talked you both up before we got here."

"Sounds like we owe you," Jacob said with a small smile. He pulled himself from the bench they had been sitting on and reached a hand out. "Thank you."

Aram took his hand, stammering a little. "Hey, what are friends for, right? I mean…. I see you guys as friends. I-"

"Yeah, pretty sure we passed that mark in there somewhere," he answered and glanced behind him, Ben making his way back towards them.

"Well, you didn't completely botch it, Jacob. You actually came across like a human being there for a few minutes."

Jacob had known the man for twenty years and he had never lost the urge to break his nose. "Why are you here again?"

"To remind you that there's a legal side to all of this," his adopted uncle grumbled. "A fact you seem to ignore in most areas of your life."

Jacob rolled his eyes and glanced over at Aram. "Just as a disclaimer, the kid would only have to be around this asshat once, maybe twice a year."

Aram's eyes grew a little at the bluntness and Liz popped him in the arm.

"What? It's not like he doesn't know," Jacob argued and Ben leveled a glare at him.

"You've always made what you think of me public knowledge."

"Goes both ways."

"And yet I'm still here. Helping you and your wife adopt a child."

"Out of the goodness of your heart, I'm sure," Jacob popped back.

"Okay, boys," Liz grumbled and turned her attention on Aram. "We owe you dinner and then some."

He gave her a sheepish smile and ducked his head a little. "I'm just glad that, after everything, you guys are going to get the chance to be happy. You deserve it. You really do." He looked awkwardly towards Ben. "I need to get some work done back at the office, but it was nice to meet you."

Ben offered a stiff nod in return and waited until Aram had moved off towards his bike to turn a sour look back at Jacob. "Well you have him fooled, don't you? Kelly called. She said that you don't have a choice. You're coming to dinner tonight, and apparently she invited friends."

"Friends?" Jacob echoed.

"That's what she said. Don something."

"She's been bugging you about setting up a time to see Elliott," Liz murmured. "Looks like she took matters into her own hands."

Jacob didn't bother hiding his groan. Great. First Aram had to be subjected to Ben and now he was going to meet Ressler. Fantastic. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Well, nothing could kill a good mood quite like Ben.

* * *

There were some people you just didn't say no to. If the head of the FBI or the president of the United States had asked Ressler and Audrey to dinner without a lot of warning, they would have gone. Kelly Jones might not have had the wide name recognition, but Ressler knew better than to try to squirm out of it.

She loved Audrey and it seemed to be everything that Kelly could do to pull herself away from Elliott long enough to cook dinner. Audrey joined her in the kitchen, their little one in her arms, and Ressler was more than happy to take a seat with Bruce in the living room.

"Jake had the adoption meeting this afternoon, didn't he? Meeting with Aram's sister's friend?"

"Yeah. With Ben along for the ride," Bruce said. "If we don't hear from them soon I'm going to start making phone calls to make sure Jake didn't finally lay him out for something he said."

Ressler snorted. He had never met Jacob's uncle, but he had heard enough about him. He had never thought Jacob was good enough to be his baby sister's son and even though he had been instrumental in making it happen on the legal front, he had never let Jake forget just how much he owed and that the debt couldn't be repaid. The thing about Ressler's partner was that he had never been one to bend under guilt trips or manipulation. It only made him fight harder. Needless to say the two had never seen eye to eye and Ressler was a little surprised to hear that Ben was in the middle of it. Maybe he thought it would be just one more thing he could hang over Jake's head.

The front door opened, catching their attention and the bickering followed almost immediately after.

"Listen, I'm just saying that you should let Liz meet with her from here on out. The girl's going to see through you eventually and your chances are-"

"Yeah, I got it the first _fifteen_ times you said it, Ben. I get it. Did it ever occur to you that maybe, just maybe, that wasn't an act and I'm excited for this?"

Liz moved into the living room at a quick pace and barely offered a nod before heading towards the kitchen and returning with a beer in either hand.

Bruce snorted. "They driving you to drink, Liz?"

"Ha," she answered and Ressler and Bruce watched as she walked right up to where Jacob and Ben had brought their argument into the room. She shoved a bottle into either of the men's hands and leveled a glare that managed to make even Jake cringe a little. "Sit down and pretend to be adults for five minutes before I get a migraine, would you?" she snapped.

Ressler barked a laugh as Jacob gave a short nod and moved to take the seat next to him and Ben sat immediately back into the chair behind him. "Should I ask how it went?" he murmured to his partner.

"Well. It went well," Jacob answered softly, popping to top off his bottle and looking a little sheepish.

"I can't tell you how much I want to snap a picture of your expression right now."

"I will break your phone," Jacob earned lowly and Ressler snorted.

"Glad it went well."

Jacob leaned back in his chair, crossing one ankle over the opposite knee and offered a smile that very few would think was fake. "Kelly'll kill us if I say anything before she gets in here."

"Kelly will kill _you_ ," Liz corrected. "I can keep a secret."

Ressler sat back and watched the exchange with an amused smile playing in his lips. Since Elliot had been born he had felt like it had been a delicate balance of work, their little family, and Audrey's overbearing family. This, sitting and having a beer with Jake and his nutty family, was exactly what he had been missing. It was strange, because he didn't usually linger on it, but they really were his as well. Kelly probably would have adopted him too if he hadn't been a grown man when he met her and Bruce. It was refreshing not to have anyone shooting at them. The most dangerous thing in the room was Jacob's temper when Ben opened his mouth.

Kelly popped in to say hi at one point, Audrey delivered Elliott into Ressler's arms only to be scooped almost immediately by Liz Phelps, and Ben finally turned his laser focus off of Jacob to discuss some investment that he and Bruce seemed to be involved in. Jacob was watching his wife play with Elliott with a small smile perking his lips and Ressler extended his beer over. "You're going to get there soon, pal."

"I hope so," the dark haired man answered and clinked the bottles.

"You will. I'll tell you, though, it's better than I expected it."

A sort of goofy grin took over and Jacob nodded. "We need to do this more often."

"No kidding. Your mom gets credit on this one though."

"So I hear."

"If you two are talking about the adoption without me you won't get dinner," Kelly warned from the edge of the kitchen.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Mom," Jacob answered with a charming smile.

"Uh huh. Food."

"You get that she knows you use that to butter her up, right?" Ressler chuckled as he stood.

Jacob shrugged as they moved towards the table, the chatter turning almost immediately to the adoption. Molly Teiger was the mother's name, and she was attending grad school at Georgetown. She was happy with the match and the Phelps' were hesitantly excited. Ben was shut down twice when he started in and Kelly raised a glass as the conversation and the meal started to wrap up. "It's been too long. To family. All of our quirky, pieced together, wonderful family and more to come."

Audrey beamed and took Ressler's hand under the table. "Let's do this more."

He offered her a quirked smile. "Yeah," he agreed softly. "I think we need to."

* * *

For all the trouble Ben stirred up when he was around, they had had fun. It had been a while since they had had a chance to see Ressler and his family outside of work and Jacob hadn't realized just how much he missed his best friend. Funny how life did that, and theirs was crazier than most.

"It was good to see everyone," Liz said as she toed off her boots at the front door.

"It was. No work, no Reddington…"

His wife snorted. "I get it. You still don't like Red."

"Oh no, I hate Red," Jacob corrected with a smile. "He drives me nuts and I've never decided just how much I can trust him."

"He's helped us a lot."

"He also keeps whatever he wants to himself."

"Yeah, I've noticed."

Jacob shifted, leaning back against the closed door. They hadn't heard from Reddington in several days now, and while Jacob was inclined to think the other man was pouting, his wife was bothered by it. Well, it and likely the last conversation they had had over it. He sighed. "You know that it falls on him, right? He swooped into your life. Sure he's done some good things for you, Liz, I can't knock that, but he's also manipulated and lied to you at every turn to get what he wants."

"I've used him too. Both of us have."

Jacob shrugged. "He came to us, babe. Burden of proof falls on him, because right now, from what I see, if there was really a lingering danger and he really wanted to help you, he'd do what you said. He would put his cards on the table." He pushed himself off the door and covered the space between them with just a couple of steps. His hand came up to the side of her face, pushing hair back and he leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead. "I'm in your corner, Lizzie. Completely."

"Completely?" she asked, her voice a little teasing. "Enough to take the pee machine out before bed?"

Jacob groaned. "Walked right into that one, didn't I?"

She grinned at him before tipping up on her toes and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. "I love you."

His smile never quite faded. "Love you too. I'll be right back, okay?" Reluctantly he released her and grabbed the leash, bending to hook it to a very excited Hudson's collar. "C'mon, buddy. You want a walk?"

Hudson barked and Liz laughed at the scene, pulling Jacob's smile into a grin as he grabbed his keys and let their favourite mutt drag him out of the townhouse. It was late and the streets were emptying out, people going about their very normal lives in their very normal way. It wasn't an entirely foreign concept. They would never be normal through and through, but Jacob was alright with that. Too normal might get a little boring, but family and friends and pieces of their life that didn't revolve around Raymond Reddington was a breath of fresh air. Maybe they could finally take a breather from the chaos they had been living in.

Jacob stopped, a strange sensation washing through him. One look at the dog showed he wasn't imagining things. He looked around, blue eyes scanning the street for anyone out and about. It was quiet, almost silent, but there was something he _should_ be noticing.

He was half turned when a sharp pain hit his knee from behind and his brain barely registered that it had been a kick that took his leg out from under him. His eyes widened as a wire looped around his neck, cutting off his air. He released Hudson's leash so that he had both hands to fight back with, and swung around, elbow catching his attacker hard in the ribs. The pressure loosened and he turned around, landing another blow before he saw his attacker's face.

Katarina Rostova shook off the hit before coming at him again. Jacob barely got his arms up to block as he stumbled back. "What the hell?" he demanded.

The former Russian spy swung around, the kick hitting hard and knocking the breath out of him so that he went down hard, his knee twinging dangerously from the earlier blow. He rolled out of the way. "I would really rather not get into a fight with my wife's mom if it's all the same to you," he growled.

Katarina smirked. "It's not about what you'd rather. It's about what she needs."

Jacob blinked hard. "What is with you people?" He rolled to his feet, Katarina coming around to land a blow and he saw the glint off the knife just in time to get his arm up as a shield. It bit in, but it was better than what she'd been aiming for. He was going to have to start fighting back or his mother-in-law was going to slit his throat.

He popped around, using one of the cars parked on the side of the street to put momentary distance between them. She followed, as he expected her to, and he rolled, catching her hard and laying her out on the sidewalk. He wasn't armed. Of all the times not to be armed.

Katarina was on her feet again and she swiped out with her knife, catching his jacket as he dodged. Jacob snapped forward, one hand reaching past the knife to her wrist and he gave it a hard twist, forcing her to drop the weapon.

"You're better than I gave you credit for," she acknowledged, swinging around with her free hand and catching him hard on the jaw.

Jacob stumbled, shaking it off. "That earned me the right to know why you're trying to kill me?"

"You're a fed, and she doesn't need the distraction."

"Funny, did I miss the part where you've been worried over your daughter for the last thirty years of her life?" Jacob snapped.

Katarina hit hard. Harder than he had anticipated and he slammed down hard enough that his vision pulsed. He blinked, trying to clear it as she bent over him. "You talk about things you don't know anything about."

He snorted. "No, I just distract," he said as he swept a leg out, taking her off her feet. He stood in one swift motion with it as she went down, but felt the ground beneath him shift as his head throbbed.

She smirked at him. "We'll see."

* * *

Liz ran her hands through her dark hair, letting a long breath out. For all the chaos that surrounded them, she was finally starting to feel a little peace. Things were finally moving their way and, if she were honest, Jacob was right. The ball was in Red's court now. If he couldn't be honest about the supposed dangers then she couldn't do anything about that. For all they knew, he was creating a false sense of danger to put off telling her who he really was to her.

Loud barking caught her attention and she moved to the door, opening the first to see Hudson outside on the doorstep, his leash dragging behind him. "Where's your dad?" she asked, letting him in and peeking down the street in both directions. A car alarm started blaring a ways down and the dog gave her an expectant look. Liz didn't hesitate, didn't even take the time to put her shoes back on, but grabbed her gun and bolted towards the sound.

She drew closer to the sound and saw why her husband had let the dog go. He was in the middle of what looked like a fight for his life with a woman Liz didn't recognize at first. It was the dyed dark hair and the shadows that kept her from seeing her mother's face at first, but at an angle she finally saw it. "Hey!" she barked, aiming her gun. "What the hell do you two think you're doing?"

Katarina stopped instantly and Jacob pulled the punch he was getting ready to throw. He sagged back a little and Liz could see blood matted in his dark hair and soaking through the arm of his jacket. She motioned with the gun and Katarina took a step back. "Masha-"

"I want an explanation, but I want to get out of the open more. Jacob?"

"I'm fine." He shot Katarina a glare. "You done?"

She tilted her head a little. "Yes."

Liz rolled her eyes and holstered the gun. "Come on," she growled, motioning towards the townhouse.

No one said a word as they walked and Hudson was whining from his spot trapped between the doors when they walked in. Liz ducked into the guest bathroom to grab a first aid kit and returned to see her husband and her mother glaring at each other in the dining room. "Sit," she instructed and Jacob did as he was told. Liz set the first aid kit on the table and opened it. "Who wants to start?"

"Well, I'd love to know why walking the dog is an attackable offence," Jacob growled and Liz shot him a warning look as she poured a little antiseptic onto a pad.

"As I would like to know what my daughter sees in a federal agent. Or better, what interest you have in her," Katarina snapped back.

Liz sighed, pulling a hiss of pain from her husband as she started to clean away the blood against her husband's temple. Her mother thought Jacob was using her. That was rich. "Funny story, we got together because he was my mark. My former employer hired me to get information on Reddington and Jacob was part of the task force tracking him down."

"Ease up, babe?" Jacob murmured, touching her hand lightly.

"Sorry."

"And what? You fell for him? I don't believe for a moment he is capable of forgiving you of that."

Jacob's eyes flashed dangerously. "You don't know a damn thing about me, lady."

"Hey," Liz coaxed before turning her attention back. "Jacob understands. I won't expect you to just believe me on that, but I know him. We understand each other and we love each other. I would appreciate if you wouldn't try to kill my husband." She winced a little at the gash half hidden by his hair and bent to get a good look at his eyes. They were focused and she fixed a butterfly bandage in place to keep it closed and let it heal. Liz kissed his forehead, pulling his arm up to get a look at that next.

Katarina shifted. "You love him?"

"I do." She looked at the man in question. "Jacket and shirt off. I need a better look at it."

"It's fine, Liz. I'll just-"

"You just had a knockdown fight outside of our home with my mother and you're going to argue with me?"

He swallowed hard and shook his head, easing himself to his feet and slowly peeling the jacket off. He grimaced as he pulled it from his left arm and Liz reached forward to help him with the buttons of his shirt that was ruined now. She glanced back at Katarina. "Are you hurt?"

"Your husband pulled his punches. Noble, but not necessary."

Jacob snorted and his expression went carefully blank as they worked together to get the shirt off of him and he sat back down, his arm up on the table where Liz could reach it easily. His gaze drifted past her as she started cleaning the blood away. "What?" he demanded.

Liz looked back out of the corner of her eye to see that her mother was staring. Katarina shifted a little. "I didn't expect so many scars," she said softly.

Jacob bristled a little and Liz offered him a small smile. "You want to know one of the ways I know?" she asked the woman behind her. "The Cabal took him when I went on the run. They tortured him, but he never gave me up. _That_ is the man I married. The man I love. If you can't accept that, then that's something you'll need to decide."

She could feel Jacob's eyes on her and she turned her own gaze back to his arm and frowned. "We have two options. You go to the hospital to get that stitched up-"

"I'm not going to the hospital," he argued stubbornly.

"Well, glad we don't have a conventional first aid kit," she murmured and moved to wash the blood off her hands so she could stitch the gash up. "It's going to scar if I do it, you know that right?"

"What's one more?"

She shook her head, drying her hands and fishing the needle and thread from the box. "Red seems to know you're in town," she said over her shoulder, the casual conversation with a woman she barely knew odd.

"All this time and Raymond is what you want to talk about?" Katarina chuckled.

Jacob tensed under her hand and she worked as quickly as possible to close up the wound. "I'm not sure I have it in me to go down my lack of memory lane. I would just assume that it links with the real question: why are you here?"

"To protect you."

Liz snorted. "Red says the same thing, so I'll tell you something. I don't need protection. I'm a trained operative. I married a deep-cover trained FBI agent. We're good."

"Babe," Jacob hissed and she offered an apologetic look with the last stitch and cut the thread. Carefully she reached for the gauze and started wrapping it up.

She turned her attention back to the woman that had given birth to her and leveled a dangerous glare. "So you don't get to show up, out of nowhere, tell me I'm in danger, and whisk me away from the life I've _fought_ for. That's not how this works."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, last week kind of shattered my heart along with the rest of the fandom. I'm hoping to have some time this evening to work on a one shot of what I _hope_ happens. If you read my Truth in the Lies one shot series and haven't had a chance to read the latest update over there, be warned: lots of angst in the aftermath of everything.

It's funny, because they finally seemed to have settled on Jacob remaining Tom instead of being called Jacob, which I'm cool with and everything, but do you know how hard it is to keep it straight calling him Jacob in this story? :P  Ah well. I'm trying to train myself over on Tumblr and in my one shots to start calling him Tom again. Just hoping I don't accidentally type it here, considering he never became Tom Keen in this universe.

Next time - Liz start catching glimpses of memories in her dreams, the task force gets a new case that doesn't set well with Jacob, and Reddington meets with his competition for the lead spot in the Cabal.


	54. Chapter 54

**Chapter Fifty-Three**

It had been a while since she had found herself standing in the middle of that burning room, but there she was. Pieces of the ceiling were falling down and in her hand was her stuffed bunny. She ghosted forward, hearing voices shouting in the distance, and as she rounded the corner she saw two figures screaming at each other. The man took hold of the woman, shaking her and screaming, but they went silent as a loud _bang_ echoed through the room and Liz found herself in someone's arms.

She squirmed, feeling panic bubble as the roof collapsed around her and she heard someone speak directly into her ear. "Run, Lizzie."

The room exploded and she tried to turn, but none of the faces were cleared. She knew who they were yet she didn't. The scene was frozen there, one man on the floor, face down in his own blood, the woman trying to wake him, and the man that had saved her from being crushed under the falling, burning beans was under them himself now.

Lizzie tried to run.

"Liz? Babe? Stop fighting. You're okay. You're okay, it's just me. It's Jacob."

Liz felt her husband's arms around her and she clung hard as the nightmare faded. He spoke soothingly, letting her find herself back in the current moment as he remained solid for her. After a moment she moved her hand, finding the bandage covering his arm wet. "You broke your stitches," she groused tiredly.

"You did, actually. I woke up to you thrashing around and you just about took my head off."

She bit her lip. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it." He quirked a smile in the dark and kissed her forehead. "Just don't blame me for it."

"Fair," she murmured and leaned forward. He was there and ready to catch her as she laid down in his lap. His fingers worked their way through her hair and she felt a calmness return.

"You want to talk about it?"

"It was just the fire. I feel like I'm surrounded by people who know what happened to me, but no one will say. It's… frustrating."

"I know, babe. We'll get to the bottom of it."

"Maybe we shouldn't. Maybe we should just adopt our child and cut ties with Red and Katarina." She sat up, looking him in the eye. "I don't need answers, Jacob. I need you. I need us. Our family is what's important, not people that think they can yank me around like some damn marionette all of the time."

Her husband offered a soft smile as he reached forward, his fingers tracing across her cheek and down towards her jawline. He pulled her into this kiss and she felt herself melt into it. When they toppled back, she wasn't sure, but she found herself leaned over him, his eyes staring up at her, more love in them than she'd ever seen for anyone else. "I know you, Elizabeth Phelps," he breathed. "You need answers. I'm going to be here. I'm not leaving."

"You're what I need," she repeated.

"I know, but that's where we're different, you know? You need to know where you come from. I don't care." He chuckled. "It's not a bad thing, Liz."

She sighed and laid down with him, her cheek against his bare chest. "There were three people there. A man saved me from being crushed by the falling house. He was hurt, I think, but he told me to run. There was another man. I think someone shot him, and a woman."

"Any faces? Voices?"

"Just his. The guy that told me to run. He sounded… I don't know. All I know is my brain told me I knew them."

He nodded. "It'll come."

"I love you."

"I love you too, babe."

"You want me to work on your arm?"

"Nah," he said and pressed a kiss to her hair. "It's fine. I think the bleeding stopped. Our alarm will go off in another hour and we'll deal with it then."

Liz wrapped an arm around his middle and felt him settle back in, the closeness easing them both back to sleep.

* * *

"Meeting with him face to face is a horrible idea."

Reddington looked over from where he was fitting his tie under his stiff collar. "Bit like going to attack your daughter's husband last night?"

" _Our_ daughter," Katarina corrected as she glared at him from the bed. "I needed to know."

"Know what? If you could break his neck without a fight? Agent Phelps has proven to be a ruthless killer when he needs to be."

Her gaze remained on him as she stood slowly, padding across the space between them. "It sounds to me like you've seen it first hand."

"He and I have had our share of run ins, though Lizzie is our common ground for the truce we hold. This is your one warning Kat: she will never forgive you if you kill him."

"You're changing the subject, Raymond. Erik. He knows your face and he will-"

"He knows my name as well. There's no doubt he already knows who I am and he's assessing the situation. The burns he received to his face appeared extensive in the photo. I am capable of fooling your ex."

He watched her nose turn up a little as she reached forward, looping his tie through for him slowly. "You know I'm on your side, yes?"

Reddington chuckled and kissed her forehead. "There are many things I feel for you, Katarina, but you and I both know that trust will likely never be one of them."

"I'm on your side," she said firmly.

"For now. Time will tell, Kat." He straightened his tie and a grabbed his coat and hat.

Reddington made his way downstairs, fit his hat on his head, and moved towards the waiting car. He slipped in the back and waited until Dembe was in the front to begin speaking. "I need you to call Mr Kaplan and have her arrange a paternity test on Elizabeth, preferably without alerting her."

"Raymond," Dembe spoke quietly from the driver's seat, that tone one Red knew well. He had never known Katarina personally, but Reddington wagered that he saw the damage that had been done in the wake of everything.

"Once Mr Kaplan is aware of what needs to be done I need to follow up with Luli on the money trace on Erik's bank accounts that she's been doing and we would not be remiss in-"

"Perhaps you should heed the warnings you have to Elizabeth," Dembe interrupted and Reddington stopped.

"- remiss inputting a tail on Katarina. Maybe a few. They won't last, but it will at least keep us informed in what she is doing. Someone different from last night, though. She's aware I was watching her."

"She is dangerous, Raymond."

"I'm well aware, Dembe. I'm taking precautions."

"You love her. There are only so many precautions to take that do not include walking away."

Red pulled in a deep breath. He needed Katarina's help in this. He knew he did. If he didn't keep her close she would simply do to him what he had done to her: take Elizabeth away. If Lizzie was his or not in blood didn't matter - though he refused to simply take Katarina on her less than reliable word - and never truly had. He had always loved her as his own and he'd be damned if Katarina got her killed because she had a blind spot when it came to Erik. "Call Kate, Dembe. I'll handle Katarina."

He saw the slight frown tug the younger man's lips and Reddington did his best to ignore it. He appreciated Dembe's concern, really he did, but they had a bigger enemy to face then. Erik Belov would destroy them all if not dealt with quickly and efficiently.

* * *

"I thought i had an overbearing mother-in-law," Ressler murmured as he shook his head from his side of the desk he shared with Jacob in their office. "I'm guessing Liz knows? You can't really hide it."

Jacob grimaced as his partner motioned to where his face was bruised down along the temple that morning, the gash he'd been dealt closed by a bandage and the stitches in his arm hidden beneath wrapping that was hidden beneath his coat. He leaned back. "She broke it up."

Ressler snorted a little. "Damn, pal. You two go all out, don't you? Is this going to-"

"No," Jacob bit out. "We're not letting Katarina Rostova get in the way. Liz has made it clear to her that our family comes first and if that's something she can't accept, she's welcome to go back to wherever she's been hiding since Liz was four."

"I take it you don't like her?"

Jacob shot him a withering look. "Oh yeah. Adding a Russian spy to our life is just what I wanted. A little normalcy is _way_ too much to ask."

Ressler chuckled, sitting back in his seat. "Guess if you wait for normal it'll never come, huh?"

"Kind of the theory we're working with right now."

"I don't envy you."

Jacob leaned forward, pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes. "I need a vacation. Not medical leave. A legitimate vacation."

"Not yet, babe." He looked up to see Liz at the door to the office, cell phone in hand. "I just talked to Red. We have a case."

"No rest for the weary," Ressler offered him and Jacob pulled himself from the chair, feeling his knee twinge from where Katarina had caught it the night before.

They followed Liz to the main area where Aram was already pulling up information. "Reddington's new Blacklister is a little out there, but he said that he was sending what he had over to Aram."

"Already got it," Aram said and cringed. "This story always freaked me out as a kid."

"He's calling her Lady Ambrosia," Liz explained. "A woman that, apparently, takes children. There have been three cases recently that Red is convinced are connected. This one -" she pointed to a young girl with paint on her face that Aram put up on the screen- "is Mary Jones. She turned up outside of a gas station barefoot and hungry. According to her parents, she died in a camping accident in 2003. Red believes her case is one of the ones linked to his Blacklister."

"And what is Reddington getting from this one?" Cooper asked.

Liz paused and Jacob could see his wife weighing her words carefully. Honesty with the team was still something of a struggle for her. "I felt like he extended it as a way to distract me," she said after a long moment. "He and I… disagree about a few personal choices recently. I think he handed this to us as a way to keep Jacob and I busy."

Copper glanced back at Jacob and the younger man shrugged. "It's like our own personal roller coaster with Raymond Reddington at the controls."

"You hate roller coasters," Ressler chuckled.

"And that about sums up how I feel about Reddington."

Liz rolled her eyes at him and he offered her a grin.

"Alright," Cooper said, bringing them back around. "Liz, your training in psychology…?"

"It's real. Maybe not from a school you'd recognize, but I guarantee the training is the same or better."

"Alright. Ressler and Phelps, take Liz with you. See what you can find out about this Lady Ambrosia."

* * *

It couldn't be said that Raymond Reddington couldn't juggle a variety of different problems at once. He was nothing if not a multitasker. Elizabeth and her husband were distracted by a case worth their interest, Luli had provided him a full work up of Erik's financials - even going so far as to find them under five other false names he kept, though she had warned him that there were some others that had proven a bit more difficult -, and Kate was looking into the issue that Red refused to focus on until he had solid proof. He had his own task at hand, and it included meeting with Erik Belov, who had given him the name Andres DuPont, and assessing exactly where they stood. If all went to plan he would have an idea what Erik was up to.

"Reddington," Laurel Hitchin greeted, her gaze drifting over to Dembe who stood with him. "DuPont was very clear on members only. You two may be vying for the same place, but we're all on the same team."

"Are we, Laurel?" Red asked cheerfully, his gaze drifting past her to where a man sat down the way on a bench, looking out over the ocean. He knew every inch of the posture, with small hidden ticks personal only to the man that Katarina had loved and that Reddington had hated for that very reason. Funny, because they often were referred to as something like friends. "I'll be along in a bit, Dembe," he said after a long moment.

Dembe didn't argue out loud, but Reddington wasn't under any disillusion that he was happy with it. He followed Hitchin down the stretch of the dock to where Andres DuPont sat. Not Erik Belov, Reddington reminded himself. Andres DuPont.

The dock was cleared of anyone other than the three of them and DuPont sat staring straight ahead, the waves lapping his Reddington took a moment to study him. His face was certainly as scarred as the photo that Hitchin had shared had indicated. Red had few of his own from that night, of course, when the house had come down and the flames had lept up. His goal, above all else, had been to get Lizzie to safety though. He had told her to run and she had, even as the roof had come crashing down and around him. His people had gotten him out and he'd been left with the impression that Erik never made it back to his feet. He had died in those flames and Katarina in the ocean. Strange how none of it had been true.

"The infamous Raymond Reddington," DuPont said without a hint of a Russian accent and slight touched of French.

"And you must be my silent competition," Red answered with a smile. "It's always nice to put a face to the name."

"Such as it is," the other man answered with a what might have been a small smirk. "Please, sit. We're all interested in much the same thing. We just believe a different man should lead the way. You're coming in with quite a reputation."

"Your own is formidable," Reddington answered easily. "Businesses littered all over Europe, both legal and less so, with connections digging into just about everywhere."

"So says the Concierge of Crime. We're well matched and can each bring a great deal to the table to rebuild this organisation as we see fit."

Reddington studied him for a moment, tilting his head. "What am I really doing here, DuPont?"

"I have an offer for you, Reddington. One that I believe will be beneficial to two businessmen such as ourselves."

"And what would that be?"

"A partnership. Let's put this competition aside and handle what needs to be done."

"And why would I do that?" Reddington asked, his expression amused.

DuPont looked at him from the corner of his eye, though never turned directly to him. His face remained directed at the waves in front of them. "Because we are both ruthless men, Mr Reddington, and by the time we would be done with this war everything we will have been trying to achieve will have been burned to ashes in our wake."

Reddington sat back. So Erik wanted something from him. If it was to take all that he thought meant something to him or if it was to get closer to access information he wasn't sure. It was a dangerous game either way.

He tilted his head a little, letting his gaze drift to the waves as well. "You'll find I don't work well with partners. Especially ones I don't trust."

" _Reddington_ ," Hitchin hissed from her place.

There was a shift then and a slow smile spread across DuPont's face. He wasn't hiding behind his disguise anymore. Not really. "It's quite alright, Ms Hitchin. Mr Reddington wants to play with fire? I'm happy to oblige."

Red chuckled and stood from the bench, tugging on his hat a little to pull it firmly into place. "You have nothing to offer me, Mr DuPont."

"Interesting that you think so, because you have quite a bit I'm willing to take."

"You can try," Reddington answered pleasantly and turned, brushing past Hitchin without a word. He had business to handle.

* * *

There was something unsettling about a case like the one they were working. The girl that they had spoken with - as much as she could or would communicate with them - had disappeared from a family camping trip years before and had been ruled dead. Her face had been painted in what looked like a pattern like a butterfly. Finger painted, they had come to the conclusion, but in the grand scheme of things it wasn't a lot to go on.

Liz glanced up from where she was looking over the photos Jacob had brought home with them. Her husband had been unusually quiet since they had left the hospital, burying himself so deeply in his own thoughts that he seemed to be running on autopilot. His gaze was distant as he ghosted through the kitchen, expertly dodging Hudson who was looking for any scraps he might drop while cooking. She watched as he moved from the fridge to the counter, finding pots and pans needed, slicing through chicken they had picked up the evening before and grabbing the seasoning. She stood and crossed the space between them, but he didn't seem to notice, his entire focus on the food he was preparing.

Carefully, gently, she wrapped her arms around him from behind, pressing her cheek against his back, and she felt him tense very quickly before relaxing again. She leaned her forehead against his back and tightened her grip. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" She snorted softly and it pulled a chuckle from him. "Maybe just a little distracted."

"Is it the case?"

He gave a small sound of affirmation as he shuffled the chicken off to the side and started in on the peppers. "Cut the front left burner on?"

Liz leaned around to do as he asked. "You're going to make me pry, aren't you?"

Jacob offered a mirthless smile. "It's just… I don't really know. The parents were lying. I know that, but a gut feeling, a read, can't be entered into evidence."

"You think they knew she wasn't dead?"

"Maybe. They know more than they're telling."

She nodded, leaning back against the counter so she could watch him work through it. "You've got one of the best BS detectors I've ever come across."

Jacob quirked an eyebrow. "It's been known to fail."

"I don't count," Liz said softly. "What has you bothered about this one?"

"Aren't you?" he asked, his expression immediately flashing from confusion back and back to neutral ground.

"It's creepy. Unnerving, definitely."

He blinked hard and pulled out one of the larger knives to slice the bell pepper.

"What are you thinking, babe?" she pressed gently.

"I don't know yet," he answered and she could hear the honesty there. "I know Red probably gave us this case to knock us off the adoption path, but…"

"I'm not sure that's what it is," Liz answered. "It's hard to say with him."

"That's because you're doing well if you receive half the truth from Raymond Reddington."

Liz and Jacob both spun to see Katarina Rostova bending over to scratch Hudson on the head. Jacob loosed a loud sigh. "Huds, you're a terrible guard dog."

Katarina shot Liz's husband a look, but it was gone in an instant. "I'm here in peace."

"Sure," he growled and turned to toss the chicken in the skillet.

"It's true. I understand you're working in a case involving Lady Ambrosia."

Liz perked. "Do you know something about it?"

"I have a lead for you," Katarina said. "I've never personally come across Lady Ambrosia, but rumour has it that your former handler has been in contact with her. He has many resources within the foster system, and she is one of them."

"The Major?" Jacob asked, tossing the chicken in the pan.

"I haven't spoken to him since I cut ties. It's not like he was happy to let me walk."

"If you want answers, that's the path to travel," Katarina said firmly. "Their connections overlap and if you make it worth it, I imagine he'd be willing to help out his favourite."

Liz stared at her mother for a long moment. "Did you ever work with him?"

"McCready?" Katarina asked and she shrugged. "No." She waved it off. "I wanted to offer you an olive branch, Masha. It is yours to take it or leave it, but I hope you know that I am not a threat to you-" her gaze flickered past Liz to Jacob -"or those you love."

The younger woman nodded. "You can start by calling me Liz. Masha Rostova was an operative. A shell of a person that filled more roles than I care to admit. No matter what you named me, that's what that name means to me, and I've _chosen_ to be Elizabeth Phelps."

"I'll try," Katarina said softly and turned.

The only sound that immediately followed her departure was the chicken sizzling in Jacob's pan and he cleared his throat. "She's lying, Liz. About your old handler."

Liz's lips thinned out. "I know."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I know I've been a bit behind with my updates. I'm sorry! Life's been crazy and I'm trying to untangle a few things in my plot. Hope you guys are still enjoying the story!

Next time - Liz meets with her former handler and the Post Office receives an unexpected visitor.


	55. Chapter 55

**Chapter Fifty-Four**

Lies had a way of building a web that eventually hanged you. Jacob had gotten pretty good in his youth at avoiding that final drop. His ability to read people and estimate how far he could take it helped tremendously - much to his adopted mother's frustration when he was younger - and it helped him spot even the most talentedly crafted of lies. He knew without a doubt that Katarina had been lying through her teeth about having ever known the Major. Liz knew it too, but she was still off that morning searching down a lead that was possibly not even a lead. It was dangerous to go sticking her neck out in front of that psychopath and her husband was not happy with the idea that he was stuck in the office sifting through photos of butterflies and hoping to find _something_ of use.

A knock at the door jolted him out of his brooding thoughts. "Where is Elizabeth? She hasn't answered her phone all morning."

Jacob blinked owlishly at Reddington. "Following up on a lead. What's up? Come to try to talk us out of the adoption again?"

"No use wasting my breath," Reddington huffed. "Katarina didn't pull her punches, I take it?" He motioned to the bruises that would just have to run their course.

"Sure she did. With a knife coming at my throat. I swear, Red, if there are anymore family surprises you need to warn us about, now's the time."

The older man snorted but didn't deny anything. He sauntered over and, without a word, started looking through the photos. Jacob snatched one back irritably. "I'm not your keeper, Reddington. What do you want?"

"To see how the case is coming along, of course." His gaze drifted over to the window. "What the hell is he doing _here_?"

Jacob stood from his seat to peek over and see what he had seen. A man was speaking with Cooper and Reven Wright. He didn't have a clear view. "Who is it?"

Reddington frowned. "He goes by the name of Andres DuPont."

"I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's not his real name."

"It wasn't when I knew him."

"So who is he?"

Reddington swiveled around, his gaze so serious that it caught Jacob a little off his guard. "He's the reason I need to see Elizabeth."

Jacob sighed deeply, frustration rolling off of him. "Who is he, Red?"

The Concierge of Crime twitched just a little. Let him feel uncomfortable. He'd dragged them into this mess.

"He's one of the two candidates for the next director's position in the Cabal."

Jacob blinked hard. "Excuse me? The Cabal that we've taken the last few months taking down and dismantling? The Cabal that chased Liz down and had me tortured? That-"

"Keep your voice down, Agent Phelps," Reddington sighed.

"You have got to be…. What the hell is the matter with you people?" Jacob shook his head and ran a hand through his dark hair, standing it in end. "Start talking, Reddington, or I swear to you I'll toss you in the box until you do."

"Really? Arresting me is your threat."

Jacob snorted. "Never said anything about arresting you. What's going on? We can't fight it if we don't know. Who's the other person looking to take over?"

Reddington pulled in a deep breath, moving away from the window. "I am," he said after a moment. "I can't risk leaving this to chance, not if you and Elizabeth are so damned determined to play house."

"We're not playing house, we're building our life," Jacob snapped. "This is not our fault, Reddington. You brought this to her doorstep. This is on you."

The older man's expression fell. "Yes," he murmured, "this is indeed on me."

Jacob felt a little of the anger subside and he leaned forward, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes. "Okay, so what's your plan if you gain complete control?"

"I will bury it so deeply that it won't be able to put itself back together again," Reddington growled, eyes flashing a little at the thought.

"Why would DuPont be here?"

"Reconnaissance. He knows about the connection I have with this task force, but he can't know I'm here today. Or that I've seen him here."

Jacob resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "I'm not your spy, Reddington," he grumbled as he stood, feeling his knee twinge, "and I'll give you one chance to let the task force in on this after I talk with DuPont. We're not your pawns to use in the game you're playing. We don't work for you."

Reddington didn't say anything as Jacob slipped past him and out the door. Cooper was speaking to DuPont with Wright, Ressler having joined the conversation. As soon as Jacob stepped out, his boss waved him over. "Agent DuPont, this is Special Agent Jacob Phelps. He was part of the team that took down this Cabal."

DuPont extended a hand. "Andres DuPont. I'm here as a laissant for Interpol to compare information on the fall of the Cabal."

Jacob took his hand, the grip firm, and he offered him a charming smile. "Nice to meet you."

"I understand that you've had a very close look at the Cabal. Especially Solomon. How is that search going?"

"Ongoing," Cooper cut in.

He didn't look at Jacob, but something in his tone made the younger man wonder if he knew he had something to do with Solomon's disappearance. Liz may have been the one to pull the trigger, but he had been right there and would have been happy to have done it himself. Cooper might let that slide after everything, but Wright probably would not. A complete outsider certainly wouldn't.

"Reven and I will be able to debrief you on what we can share in my office."

DuPont nodded, offering one last look towards Jacob. "Of course," he said as he followed behind. Jacob's jaw clenched irritably as he watched him go. Things just kept getting worse.

"What the hell was that?" Ressler demanded.

"We've got a problem. DuPont may be with Interpol, but according to Reddington he's also one of the lead competitors to take the Director's chair in the Cabal."

* * *

She hadn't been sure that Bud would meet with her at all, much less that he would be stateside and able to meet quickly. He had responded in record time, though, and Elizabeth Phelps found herself sitting at a table in a restaurant that had not opened for the day's business yet, and waiting for her former employer. The only sounds that she heard were a few rustling movements in the kitchen, but otherwise things remained still and undisturbed as she flipped through photos on her phone of pieces of evidence.

The door opened and Liz steeled herself as familiar footsteps circled around behind her. Bud moved in and was nearly next to her before she turned a look up at him, a small and quirked smile perking her lips. "Hi, Bud."

"Masha," he greeted. "You said this would be worth my time. Hope you're not crawling back."

Interesting. That's why he thought she was here, and he'd been quick to come to her for that. "No," she assured him and handed him the phone with the little boy they had spoken to. "I'm working with Jacob on a case having to do with children who we believe have been abducted by a woman that they call Lady Ambrosia."

Bud stared at her like she had lost her mind. "And what the hell does your boyfriend's fairytale case have to do with me?"

"She has a connection with someone in the foster system that finds children that they're having difficulty adopting out. Children with disabilities, with-"

"And you think you can find a link with St Regis' connections," Bud breathed. "Masha, you're smarter than this, girl."

"You think I'd come empty handed?" She held a jumpdrive up. "With me gone, Gina will be your go-to to run the business someday. This jumpdrive holds everything the FBI has on her. I replaced it with filler information so they won't realize it's missing. I'm willing to trade this for the name of your contact with social services that also works with Lady Ambrosia." She tilted her head a little, waiting. He had multiple contacts. The gamble was on if Gina was still worth enough to him to burn one.

"And if I give you a false lead?"

"I hope we have enough history you wouldn't do that," she said evenly, "but if you agree to the deal and even think about screwing me on it, they'll suddenly have more information on her than they ever dreamed."

Bud snorted. "Taught you well, kid."

"Yes you did," she said softly and loosed a breath. "That's why I'm asking and offering. You don't want to make the deal, then we both just walk. If you do, we both benefit."

He watched her carefully, those eyes that had seen more than she could ever imagine studying her closely. She had always respected Bud. He had made it clear when he took her in - younger than any of his other students by several years - that he wasn't her family, but he was the closest thing to a father she had known growing up. He taught her how to survive, and in the end she wasn't sure that was a debt she really could repay, even if she had paid off her schooling debts to him in record time. She had been his best, and she knew that Reddington was the only reason she had been allowed to walk. She wouldn't invoke his name now. This was between she and Bud.

"Noah Shuster," Bud said after several long moments. "He'd be the only one. Most of the kids he works with aren't right for the program, but he's found a few. He'd be the one working with her."

Liz nodded slowly and handed him the jump drive. "I hope you know I'll never be the one to sell you out, Bud."

He smirked at her. "Not unless I screw you first, huh?"

"You taught me well."

Bud snorted. "You're ruined anyway. Glad Reddington bought your contract."

The words were gruff, but they brought the smallest smile to her lips. "Otherwise you'd have had to kill me?"

"Otherwise I would have," he assured her.

She nodded and stood. "Good doing business with you," she said and turned. There was no room with him for sentiment. There never had been.

* * *

She had first come across the man that they called the Major years before. The job had required a certain skill set that one of the Major's operatives had supplied. It had been convenient and she had used his people several times after that. Not once in their years of business had Bill McCready mentioned that Masha Rostova was one of his star operatives.

Katarina slipped into the restaurant quietly, her steps silent as she moved past the kitchen and down the hallway. Masha's voice drifted from the main room, cutting a deal and getting what she needed from him. She was a little soft with him, but Katarina thought that might come from the fact that she had been playing house with the fed for so long now. She had it in her mind that she was one of the _good guys_. That somehow she was choosing a better side. The fact that there were no sides didn't matter. If it helped her sleep at night, her mother wouldn't begrudge her that.

She _would_ begrudge McCready his lies of omission though.

Masha finished her conversation, received her information, and was gone. No reason to linger.

McCready had a bad habit of traveling without protection. He relied on anonymity coupled with fear instilled in those that did know him as his guard, and it seemed to have worked well enough over the years. His luck had ended though.

Katarina waited until the door closed behind Masha to step from the shadows. "You're a difficult man to find, Bill."

The Major turned, eyes narrowing a little. "Katarina Rostova. It's been a while. I wasn't aware you were trying to get in contact."

She offered him an easy smile. "Nor was I aware that you were so well acquainted with my daughter." She watched him carefully, seeing the smallest signs of agitation. "Bill, you're a smart man. Why would you ever think you could pull that one over on me?"

"I find my recruits from the streets and the foster system, Katarina. I don't force them. I give them a choice: stay in the shit situation life has dealt them or let me teach them how to become something more. Funny thing, but your kid chose St Regis. She chose to become a deep cover agent. Must run in the blood."

He was looking for a way out. She could see it in his eyes. She crept a little closer. "You helped keep my daughter from me, Bill."

"I got her off the streets."

"And made her a killer."

He snorted. "Oh no. She was already that. I just gave her direction."

McCready went for his gun, but Katarina was just a little quicker. She moved, reaching out and taking it from him. In one swift motion she flipped it and the muzzle was aimed at his chest. "I suppose that was in her blood too," she said icily and the shots went off, the suppressor quieting them as the man that had raised her daughter fell dead to the floor.

* * *

Liz strode into the Post Office with her lead and a purpose. They were going to wrap this case up quickly, help the kids, and move past it. She had figured out what had been bothering her husband on the whole ordeal, and it wasn't the adoption. If anything, this case was pushing them _towards_ the adoption. _Towards_ giving a child a home. No, it wasn't that that was bothering him, even if he was trying to find any other reason but the real one: it could have been him. It could have been her. Jacob had always struggled with the emotional scars his life before Kelly and Bruce had carved in him. He played the part of an adjusted man very well - so well that sometimes she wondered if he were doing it to convince himself - but there were signs if one knew him well enough. After everything he had been through with his biological mother and then the foster system, it would have been a miracle for him to have escaped unscathed. He was better now, but as a child he had been angry and distant, having an even harder time making meaningful connections and with fewer restraints on his more violent impulses. Liz had always wondered if he'd ever even known love before Kelly and Bruce took him in. If they hadn't, if his file had crossed this Lady Ambrosia's radar in his youth, he might have fit at least some of the things she was looking for. Liz had already known he would have been _exactly_ what Bud was always on the lookout for. The sooner they moved past this case the better for him. For both of them.

"Oh! Liz? Hi, Liz," Aram called, halfway tripping over himself as he scrambled up. "I was hoping you'd be in today. I just wanted to let you know how excited Molly was to meet you both. Still is. Agent Phelps' uncle said something about paperwork…"

"Yeah, Ben knows all the details to that. I'll give him a call and get the details. Could you do me a favour?"

"Sure."

"Look up the name Noah Shuster in the directory for social services?"

"You found the lead then?"

She flashed him a grin. "I found the lead. Where's Jacob?"

"He and Agent Ressler are in their office."

"Thanks. Let me know what you find on Shuster."

Liz moved past Aram, starting for her husband's office, but movement on the stairs caught her attention. Cooper was walking down with another man in tow. Liz didn't recognize him, so he wasn't a regular there at the Post Office, but as he turned towards her and she saw the deep scars across his face - burns, as best as she could tell - there was something familiar in the way that he looked at her. His gaze held her in place, still and unmoving, as he paused as well at the bottom of the stairs.

"Agent DuPont?" Cooper called.

"Excuse me. Are you _the_ Masha Rostova? You may have left that out of your debrief, Agent Cooper."

"Ms Phelps' association with the bureau is classified information."

"Phelps? As in Agent Jacob Phelps that I had the pleasure of meeting earlier? He must be the husband that was mentioned on the news."

Liz's gaze flickered to Cooper, trying to gauge the situation. She offered DuPont a smile. "If you don't mind, I have something I need to discuss," she said noncommittally and ducked into the office. Both men and Reddington looked up at her as soon as she did. "Who the hell is that?"

Reddington stepped forward, a strange expression resting on his face. She thought it might be fear. "Elizabeth, did you speak with him?"

"Briefly. Cooper shut it down. Who is he? He looked like… Like he knew me."

The man that held answers to questions she didn't know she should be asking yet frowned, studying her. "He does," he said after a moment.

"The fire," Liz breathed.

"What makes you say that?"

"Could be the scarring on his face?" Jacob popped off from his chair and Liz looked over to him, trying to decide if that's what had driven the words from her tongue.

"He knows you are connected to me," Red said quietly. "I told you this war wasn't over, Lizzie. This is proof."

"He's in competition to run what's left of the Cabal," Ressler offered from his place. "Reddington was just bringing Jake and me up to speed on that little detail."

Reddington snorted. "Really, Donald, if you expect a play by play of my business-"

"So is it business or is it to take them out?" Jacob asked, his voice even but chilled.

"The Cabal will fall and everyone in this room benefits from that," Reddington answered tightly.

"Does Cooper know he's Cabal?" Liz asked, the question wedged between the building tension in the room.

"Not yet. Not exactly something to tell him while the man's standing there," Jacob answered.

Liz nodded, trying to push the look the man had given her from her mind. She shook her head a little and turned her attention to her husband. "I got the name."

Jacob blinked, shifting forward so he stood. "From the Major? How?"

She smirked. "He taught me well. Aram's searching the guy down know. We're going to catch the lady soon, and then-" she offered him a sly sort of smile - "we should probably talk to Ben about the paperwork for Molly's baby."

"Did Aram say something?"

"Yeah. It's official."

His entire expression lit and Jacob didn't seem to care that anyone else was in the office with them. He covered the space between them and pulled her into his arms, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. "That's amazing," he breathed, pulling a laugh from her.

"Come on. Let's catch a terrible person and then we can work out the details."

He nodded and Liz took his hand, purposefully ignoring the look Reddington was giving her.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: I should probably apologize for being a bit slow to update lately. For those of you that follow me over on Tumblr you have probably seen that I've been trying to work through some of my rather twisted loose ends as we hedge closer and closer to the end of this story. With the Cape May episode giving us some information about canon Katarina, I was starting to tangle up things Red had said here, things Katarina had said, things that were actually done, things that had been done but haven't been talked about yet, and then canon lol. It's been a mess, so I went on about a 20 chapter glance-over this past week or so. The result is a new folder in my ever-growing notes for Everything Back to You and a better idea of where I'm going. I'm also a wee bit behind in my writing now. I'm usually writing 3-4 chapters ahead on average, but right now I only have one full chapter between this and where I'm writing. Chapter 56 is about 3/4 the way done or maybe a little more, but still... it makes me nervous. That and I'm always worried about losing you guys if I wait too long between chapters. I hope you're still reading and enjoying it! If so, feel free to drop me a note. It always brings the biggest smile to my face. No lie :)

Next time - The task force wraps up the Lady Ambrosia case and Katarina takes things into her own hands.


	56. Chapter 56

**Chapter Fifty-Five**

He woke to the feeling of hands around his throat, shoving him down so that water filled his lungs, and all he could make of the person standing over him was a blurred figure with dark hair who was holding him under. The image slipped away as Jacob blinked hard against the dark room, one hand going to his throat and finding nothing out of the usual. No hands wrapped around his neck, no bruising. He pulled in a shaky breath and glanced to the other side of the bed, finding it empty.

Jacob sat up slowly, finding the room silent. No light shone out from under the door of the bathroom, so he slipped out of bed, grabbed his glasses, and padded nearly silently towards the stairs. He found his wife sitting near the bottom of them, leaned against the railing with Hudson half in her lap. She glanced back at him. "Hey. I was trying not to wake you."

"Did that all on my own," he assured her. "What has you up?"

She was quiet for a long moment as he inched his way down, finally taking a seat behind her and his hands went to her shoulders. They were stiff and knotted up, but she leaned back into his touch as his fingers gently worked at them. "DuPont, the case, Reddington… Take your pick. You?"

"Had a dream about my biological mom," he confessed softly.

Liz turned so she could look at him. "That's been a while. You think the case is stirring that up?"

"Probably."

"You okay?"

He gave her a small smile, leaned forward, and pressed a kiss to her dark hair. "Just a dream. They fade. You worried Red isn't telling us the truth about DuPont?"

Liz sighed, settling back in so she was staring straight ahead. "It's not that Red _lies_ to me, not really, he just…only tells me as much as he wants. He leaves out important details, he's cryptic. He's hiding something, and I want to know what. Katarina was right about Bud. Maybe she would be willing to talk to be about this DuPont."

"You trust her?" Jacob asked carefully.

"You don't."

It wasn't a question, but it wasn't quite a statement either. He knew she expected a response. Jacob loosed a long breath, leaning forward so that his arms draped over her shoulders in a loose hug from behind. "The woman attacked me while I was walking Hudson. I'm hesitant to throw my trust into her corner."

"And you don't trust Red," his wife pointed out and he could hear the tease in her voice.

"Hey now. You knew I had trust issues when you married me."

Liz chuckled, leaning back into him. "I have a few too, but I think I'm too close."

"You asking for advice?"

"Yeah."

"Trust yourself. Trust us. Those two… They may care, I don't know yet, but they'll twist you around until you don't know which way is up. I don't think they know how to do any different."

"Maybe this is too much," she sighed. "Maybe we should just go as soon as we have our child. Just move and get away from it all."

Jacob winced a little at the thought. It had crossed his mind, but he had shot it down immediately. They had too much where they were. "Babe, if we run now, we'll always be running. You know that. We both spent a chunk of our childhoods running. We don't… We can't do that to our kid."

"When did it become this?"

Jacob snorted softly and pulled her a little closer. "I think it's always been this. We just didn't admit it to ourselves."

"I really like the idea of just being a normal, boring couple. Is that insane?"

"Well, we can be our brand of normal, but, uh, not sure how boring it'll be. We can do this, though. I promise we can."

"I know."

He felt her lean back into him. "Tomorrow we're going to catch this Noah Shuster and he'll lead us to Lady Ambrosia. We'll wrap it up and you and I can focus on the adoption."

"What about DuPont?"

"We'll figure it out."

Liz nodded. "I can't help the feeling that I know him somehow."

"And we'll find out how. Just… not tonight?"

He offered her a cheeky smile as she rolled her eyes, pulled away to stand, and leaned back down to kiss him. He pulled her down into it, her laugh sounding in his ears as they fell back on the steps at the awkward angle. She didn't pull away though. There wasn't any distance between them. Whatever it was, whatever secrets Reddington was keeping this time, they would face them together.

* * *

Dembe would tell him to tell her. Kate would agree. Hell, anyone that Reddington trusted would tell him the same thing. She deserved to know, but as he stared at the paperwork in his hand, the truth rattling around dangerously in his mind, he couldn't imagine ever finding the right words to say.

"I didn't lie to you, Ray."

He didn't turn to look at her. "I know."

"We're you hoping I had?"

"Perhaps… if she were really Erik's child it would have provided her an extra layer of protection. Does he know?"

Katarina took a seat across from him at the table at the little diner. "I don't know," she admitted softly. "Like me, I'm sure he thought she died in that fire. I didn't know that _he_ was alive until recently. His connections with the Cabal have been distant at best."

"My people are the best and they don't show a connection with Interpol," Reddington huffed. "Yet there he was in the Post Office as if he belonged there."

"You're playing a dangerous game, Ray. If you lose, Masha is the one to pay the price."

"And what would your suggestion be, Kat? Will you let me kill him?"

"Would you not if I asked you?"

Reddington swallowed hard. He wasn't sure.

"It's a moot point anyway. He'll never give you the chance. Your people may kill his and vice versa, but you squandered your one chance to keep our daughter safe." She fell silent for a moment, those blue eyes of hers flashing dangerously after a moment. "I chose him over her once and it nearly killed everyone. I won't make that mistake again."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Draw him out, but not with Masha. With me."

"No."

"His focus will shift. We don't know what his goal is with Masha, but wth me-"

"No," Reddington bit out again.

"You're not the only one capable of protecting her," Katarina snapped.

"No, but out of the two of us I am the only one I trust to do what needs to be done. Stay away from this, Kat." He shuffled the papers. They needed to be destroyed, but as he started to stand he caught her gaze. "Killing her former handler was a risky move. She does not trust you yet."

"And she doesn't trust _you_ because you play everything too close. Old habits you've never learned to overcome. I told you the truth, Ray. If you don't want me doing this on my own, work _with_ me."

She sat where she was, her gaze holding him there. He should leave. He should walk away from her. He couldn't protect Elizabeth if he was constantly questioning Katarina's loyalties. And he would always question them, he reminded himself. After everything, they had so little they could trust each other on, no matter what feelings they shared.

"Let me protect her, Kat. That is how we all get out of this alive."

He didn't wait for her to respond, but pressed a kiss to her forehead and was gone. He needed to get things into place. If she was right about one thing, it was that they were playing a very dangerous game.

* * *

The late night had turned into a late start the next morning. Jacob and Liz had ducked around each other in an attempt to look at least somewhat presentable as they had piled out the front door. The call had come in that they had picked up Shuster and the man hadn't lasted long against Samar. By the time the Phelps' had walked into the Post Office they were gearing up to turn around and walk right back out. Shuster's wife kept the children in an abandoned school and apparently she thought she was trying to "save" them by killing them on their birthdays so that they would never grow old. There weren't a lot of things that could turn Jacob Phelps' stomach, but this woman might just.

It took some convincing, but Liz finally hung back as the agents took the school. Jacob, Ressler, and Samar moved in with a small team of agents to find that there was no real resistance. The woman that had been taking the children hardly looked like a demon worthy of a nightmare. She was sitting at the tables with them as they strung together flowers into some sort of crown. The shock on her face was priceless, but she didn't move as Ressler started to read her her rights.

Jacob's gaze swept over the room. Children sat watching in awe as the people moved in and around them. Once the building was cleared they would have trained individuals to help the kids. Liz was going to come in with them. Her training might have been for an assignment, but she was good. Better than Jacob thought he could ever be. Maybe that's what Reddington was trying to remind him of. Liz thought that the case had been merely a distraction, but Jacob had a distinct lack of trust when Raymond Reddington handed them a case that could influence their private lives. Maybe he was trying to remind Jacob that this was not his forte. He might have been given a second chance at life, but the damage had been dealt already. He connected well with so few people...what if he couldn't connect with his own child?

A small hand tugging on his jacket startled him out of his thoughts. A little girl stood there, red hair in braided pigtails and she smiled up at him. She didn't say anything, but she held a little crown of flowers up to him and he took it numbly. She motioned - sign language, he realized - and he offered her a small, real smile. "Thank you," he mouthed slowly and her smile only brightened.

"You're better with them than you give yourself credit for," Liz said from behind.

"Yeah, well you're biased."

"She isn't," Liz murmured, motioning to the little girl. His wife reached for his hand, giving him a small smile. "You're going to be fine. We both are."

He nodded, his smile growing just a little. "Just need that reminder every once and awhile," he teased softly and pressed a quick kiss to her lips.

* * *

There had been a time when the thought of having a child had been nothing but a burden. Masha had not been planned, nor has she come into the world during a peaceful or convenient part of her life. Not that there had ever been one for her. Katarina had had no interest or drive in becoming a mother, but it had been Raymond that had slowly and steadily convinced her to see it differently. It had been subtle and careful, just as he always was, but above all it had been genuine. It hasn't mattered if Masha were his or if she were Erik's, he had loved her so dearly before even seeing her face that it had changed Katarina's mind, and now, so many years later, she couldn't imagine it any other way. If she had to, she would burn the world to protect her daughter.

That was what left Katarina Rostova standing on a dock after most people had left for the evening. It had been a risk to reach out to Erik, and to even verify that she was alive after all, but it was worth it to draw him out. She had people set up and ready to take him out as soon as she gave the signal. Once he was dead Masha would be safe. It was a sacrifice she had to make.

Her phone buzzed in her jacket and Katarina gave a quick glance around before slipping it out and to her ear. "I assume this is about the report your man has given on me. Tell him not to interfere or I'll be forced to take him out of the game," she said softly.

" _Kat, please tell me you weren't so foolish as to_ -"

"You're not the only one willing to risk things for her."

" _He'll kill you_ ," Raymond snapped.

"I have this under control, though I would have preferred to do it together." She ended the call, shoving it back into her pocket. Did he expect her to rush into this without a plan? Of course he did, because Raymond Reddington simply couldn't be bothered with trusting anyone else to take control of a situation.

A sound caught her attention and she turned, finding a different face than she had expected. "Good evening, Ms Rostova," the woman said, her heels tapping against the wooden pier as she walked. "Mr DuPont sends his regards to you and his condolences for your snipers."

Katarina's eyes narrowed. "And who are you?"

"Your escort. He would like to meet, but I'm sure you understand that he'd rather not take a bullet for the efforts."

"And if I don't go willingly?"

The woman frowned. "I'm not the person you call to get her hands dirty, really," she sighed. "Just trying to survive the fallout, and Reddington did tell me to pick a side."

"Hitchin," Katarina murmured.

"I like to win," Hitchin acknowledged. "And right now, my money's on DuPont."

Katarina took a step forward, ready to end the conversation by force if necessary, but felt a small prick on her neck. Her hand went to it to find a small dart that must have been the source of the numbness that was spreading. "He'll kill you all."

"You have so much faith in a man that is incapable of returning it," Hitchin answered with a shrug. "You don't look well. Let's get you to the car."

Katarina sank against her, feeling the other woman shuffle her along. She was better than this. Maybe Raymond had been right in that Erik was her blind spot, and her lack of foresight might just get her killed.

* * *

"Did I hear Don say that he and Audrey are thinking about moving out of the apartment?" Liz asked.

"Huh?" her husband asked as he straightened from where he'd been crouched down, looking at one the lower shelves of food at the grocery store that they had stopped off at on their way home. "Yeah, I think so. Something about wanting more space with the kiddo."

"Good thing we've got an extra room. I'm not sure I'll ever pry you out of that townhouse," Liz teased, shifting the shopping basket to get other arm.

Jacob looked up at her. "I like that place. Why would you want to leave?"

"I'm giving you a hard time," she laughed, bending to press a kiss to the top of his head. "I'm starved. Tell me what we need while you figure this out and I'll go get it."

"You want to grab that bread you like and a bottle of wine?"

"I think I can manage that." She didn't give him a chance to pop off like that mischievous glint in his eyes warned her he was about to, but started off for the aisle with the wine. They had been stuck at the office later than usual, wrapping up the case with all the paperwork that involved. Social Services was all over it and Jacob had been ready to scoot out as soon as he'd gotten the go-ahead to do so. The case had weighed on him enough as it stood. Liz was ready to move past it and focus on the little one that they were adopting. A girl, they'd found out finally, and it had been everything she could do to get her husband to breathe and take a small break from baby names. It was more amusing than anything else, and it meant he was more excited about it than terrified, which was certainly a good sign. Maybe they could even convince Cooper to give them some time off that wasn't hard-earned through dangerous injuries and medical leave.

"Elizabeth Phelps."

Liz stiffened, surprised that she hadn't heard someone approach. As she turned and kicked herself even harder. "Agent DuPont, was it? What a coincidence."

He gave her the barest of smiles, almost missed the the scars that made up his face. "It is. I hope I'm not intruding, but I saw you across the way. We hardly had time to speak at the black site."

"My connection with them is classified. Better we don't. Have a good evening."

DuPont stepped in her way as she tried to duck around him and Liz stiffened a little, irritated. All she wanted to do was get the wine and bread and go home to pretend, just for a few moments, that that was the worst of it. She wanted the Cabal to give her five seconds to breathe after everything. Was that too much to ask? "You'll forgive me, but you look so like your mother that it's...stunning."

She froze where she was, knowing she shouldn't react. "You knew my mother?" she asked carefully.

"I did."

Liz studied him for a long moment before turning, grabbing a bottle of wine from the shelf, and starting around him. This was a trap. She wasn't an idiot. "I'm not her. My husband is waiting for me to get my end of the list. Excuse me."

"I still do know her," DuPont said as she turned to leave. A short chuckle escaped him. "Still as feisty as she ever was. I've missed her all these years. And you, Masha."

"If you're here to threaten me-"

"In a grocery store full of people while you and your husband are likely both armed? No. I came here to tell you I have her, and now that I've seen you, Masha - seen you as the woman you've grown into - I don't think you'll be able to resist coming for her. It's in your blood."

"So she's bait? Why? How do you know me? Why do I matter so much to you people?"

He levelled a strange sort of look at her. Part suppressed anger, part calculation, and maybe even a small part sadness. "Because he turned you against me, and there's no undoing that now."

"Liz?"

Liz turned at the sound of Jacob's voice behind her and her husband stood with his eyes slightly narrowed at DuPont, and she could see him tense and ready for everything to go to hell. DuPont was still smirking just a little. "Give Reddington my regards," he said as he sauntered past, leaving the pair standing in the aisle together.

"Lizzie?"

She swallowed hard. "He has my mom."

Jacob sighed heavily and reached out to her, pulling her close and pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Call Reddington."

"But-"

"I know. Call him."

Liz grimaced and squeezed his hand. "I love you."

"You too. Meet you at the car."

She nodded, pulling her cell phone out. DuPont wanted her to call Red, that much was obvious, but both she and Jacob knew they didn't have a choice. There were too many unknowns, and only one man that truly had the answers. This time Liz wouldn't take no for an answer.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: So, I described last week's episode as one of those bridge episodes/chapters to get all the characters lined up where they need to go. I feel like that is a good chunk of this chapter, but hopefully there's enough excitement in here that it wasn't too much that way. :-/

Next time - Katarina faces her ex, the task force is brought in, and Liz receives a shock about her past.


	57. Chapter 57

**Chapter Fifty-Six**

It wasn't the fact that she had thought he had died that had haunted her. It wasn't even how he had died. It was things that were said, things that were done. She should have cut ties with him and left, but she'd been afraid. The infamous Katarina Rostova had been afraid. At least she could say it hadn't been for herself. That had to count for something.

The door to the room opened behind her and she steeled her expression. They had left her waiting there for hours. It was a method, and one she had used on others before. She didn't turn as footsteps sounded behind her, echoing slowly and methodically. He was taking his time, allowing her to sweat if she would, and she almost smiled at that. Maybe she had finally lost it a little. The chances were fairly even between an interrogation and a bullet to the head.

"Katarina."

Her face blanked immediate, though she felt something in her chest betray her as Erik circled around slowly. She had seen pictures of the scars left by the fire that she had thought for so many years had killed him, but she hadn't been close enough to see them herself. She hadn't dared. Now, though, as he circled around her, she had a clear view of him and she saw something in his eyes that told her that the scars were not all physical. He had always balanced on an edge, and with everything that had happened he had been flung over the edge. The terrifying thing was that it was not something anyone else would have seen. He could have fooled the world into thinking he was steady, but not Katarina Rostova.

"I spoke with Masha tonight," he said as he faded back around out of her line of sight. "I saw her briefly before, but she ducked away too quickly. Tonight, I saw her."

"And?" Katarina asked icily, but she knew what he meant. It was her greatest fear. It was the fear that she'd always held.

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

She straightened as best as she could in her seat, her hands tied and she'd need to break her thumb to get out. It was getting to the point that she was thinking about it.

"I knew about you and Reddington. I was never the fool you took me for."

"I never took you for a fool, Erik. Faithfulness between us was never expected. Not in our lives. Not with our jobs."

He bristled at that. "He was more than a job, Katarina. You fell in love with him, and you brought his bastard home to try to pass her off as mine. Why?"

"You would have killed her."

"And we could have avoided _all_ of this. Now… Now she's grown and she'll die just the same. Reddington taking her away, your supposed suicide… None of it matters, Katarina. I will destroy them both and you'll live long enough to see their worlds shatter and the life leave their eyes."

"It's me you hate, Erik. Leave it at that."

Erik snorted. "You know me better than that."

She bristled at his words, her hands carefully and steadily working at the bindings around her wrist. She felt one slip and pulled hard, not risking losing her moment. Katarina let the way her hand came flying out of the restraint add momentum behind the blow. Her fist connected with Erik's jaw and she swung the chair around, her right wrist aching terribly where it was still connected as the chair collided with him, sending him stumbling back hard and snapping it so she could pull free.

Erik stumbled, but he didn't fall. The years hadn't slowed either of them and he swung around, barely missing her, and Katarina ducked around. The door came flying open behind her and suddenly Erik was on her, slamming her hard into the wall and pinning her there by the arms. She slammed her head forward into his hard. She knew it wouldn't free her, but she smirked at the briefest flash of pain. "You want to know why I lied to you, Erik?" she snarled around her smile. "Because there is _nothing_ I wouldn't do to protect my child. Even if that means I have to kill you to do it."

The man she had once lived gave a low chuckle. "You better hope she doesn't love you like you love her, Katarina, because if she comes for you I'll be ready."

* * *

It wasn't often that she worked herself into one of these moods, but when she did there was no stopping her. She was in a near rage at anything that happened to be in her way, and he felt powerless to help.

Hudson had retreated upstairs and Jacob sat on the couch to stay out of his wife's way as she stormed through the entire first floor of their townhouse, trying every point of contact to track Reddington down that she had. Liz let out a frustrated sound as her newest attempt failed and she hurled the phone across the room, well aimed at the cushioned chair to keep it from breaking. "I can't get rid of the man when I _want_ to," she growled.

Jacob loosed a breath, carefully easing himself to his feet and circling around the coffee table to her. She looked ready to say something nasty and he paused, waiting, before he watched the mask of anger give way to the helplessness she was really feeling. He reached out and Liz fell into his arms, tense and her grip on him was desperate. "It's so stupid. I don't even know the woman."

He chuckled very softly and pressed a kiss to the side of her head, his hand moving to run long fingers through her hair in a soothing motion. "She's your mom."

"This isn't like Kelly though. I haven't… It's stupid." She shifted so that she could look at him. "She attacked you. Unprovoked. We're bringing a child home soon. I… It's insane that I should be this worried. That I should be willing to jump in for a woman I don't know."

"No it's not." He sighed, trying to pull his thoughts together. He could do this. For her, he could do this. "Babe, I know I… I know we react differently to our biological parents. I know I haven't been… as supportive as I should be about Katarina-"

"Jacob…"

"Let me finish?" he murmured. "It's me letting my own experiences dig in too deep. Mine aren't yours. I… she's a little vicious, but you can be too when someone you love is in danger. That's not necessarily a bad thing." He saw his wife quirk a very small smile. "We're going after her, and if we can't find Reddington, we'll go after her with the task force."

"Why would they help us track down Katarina Rostova?"

"Because you're a part of the team now." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "And for the higher ups, we're going to hand them the last of the Cabal."

She blinked, looking up at him like she were trying to gauge if he were just trying to settle her down or if he really meant it, and Jacob felt a little guilt settle in. He leaned in, his forehead touching hers and he pulled a steadying breath in. "I knew enough about my mother, she did enough for me to know I never wanted to see her again, but you don't know Katarina. You deserve the chance."

Liz reached her hand to his face, her palm against his cheek for the briefest moment before she pulled him down, her lips against his. "Thank you," she murmured.

"I love you," he swore, his voice a little more strained than he expected. "You're not in this on your own. None of it."

She nodded, her expression open and she kissed him again. "I love you too. Thank you."

He offered her a small, slightly playful smirk. "All I ask is that if my birth mom ever shows up that you help me stay as far away from the situation as possible."

That pulled a smile from her. "Deal."

"Good," he answered with a quirked smile and kissed her forehead. "You make sure Huds is good for the night and I'll wake everyone up."

"They're going to be pissed."

"Part of the job. We'll get coffee on the way. Seems to work when Aram does it. No one ever gets mad at him." He pulled his phone out, quietly relieved that Reddington hadn't answered. He could only take so much uncertainty in this, and with Reddington, the one thing a person could count on was that he hadn't revealed everything.

* * *

Ressler could feel the migraine coming. It could have been due to the late hour of the night, but, more likely, it was due to the subject matter. At least Jacob had brought coffee. It was a start. "Let's just run this through one more time," he said as he rubbed at the bridge of his nose, trying to ease some of the tension there. "Katarina Rostova went after DuPont and DuPont just approached you guys in the grocery store? We don't have any sort of lead on where he's keeping her, why she's there, _if_ she's really there-"

"She's there, Donald."

He wasn't the only one to whirl, surprised at the voice. The whole team turned almost in unison as Raymond Reddington's very irritable voice bounced off of the mostly-empty Post Office war room. He trudged in, the guard that had escorted him down left in his tracks and Dembe moving with him. Ressler couldn't tell if he was angry, upset, or something else entirely. Whatever it was left him with the uncomfortable feeling that they were about to get further off book than he'd hoped. One glance at his partner - who was leaned against a desk next to Liz, his shoulder touching hers in a way that put them close but that didn't draw attention from the team - and he knew that he'd be along with it. They were family. All of them. Damn it all.

"I've been trying to get ahold of you," Liz snapped, her shoulders straightening a little, but she didn't leave Jacob's side.

Reddington looked at her for a long moment, as if he were going to say something important, but then thought better of it. He sighed deeply and his shoulders slumped, like the mirror opposite of hers, and he cleared his throat. "I was detained. It seems that I've put my trust in someone I shouldn't have and it's cost me. And you, Elizabeth."

Ressler glanced over to Jacob who looked irritated at the words, but it was Cooper that spoke. "We want to help, Reddington, but this is a federal task force. Give me something - _anything_ linked to the Cabal - and I'll mobilize."

Their informant had been vague when he had explained DuPont a few days before. The Cabal was still in play, though not nearly as strong, and he was in the process of dismantling it in a way that only someone outside the law could. It wasn't like they could do a damn thing about it, no matter how much they wanted to. Solomon's body had just been uncovered and while the official records said that they hadn't found his killer and that ballistics came up with little information that would help in that, Ressler was well aware that the line of very capable and well trained people that Solomon had hurt deeply was long and Reddington had connections to every one of them. He just didn't dare linger too long on the thought of if his partner were capable of it or not.

DuPont was, as far as they could tell, truly connected to Interpol, tying the FBI's hands badly. Without actionable intel that sent them in and allowed them to find the connection, they would be hard pressed to bring the man in, no matter the threat he might pose. Not that Reddington would tell them exactly what that threat was.

The Concierge of Crime pursed his lips and looked over to Liz as if he were weighing an option very carefully. Finally he sighed. "DuPont's real name is Erik Belov. He is former KGB and a long time member of the Cabal."

"It says in the system that he was killed in the US in 1988," Aram said, and a few expert keystrokes brought what might have been Andres DuPont's face to the screen for them all to see. It was difficult to say for sure with the scars that had been left there since.

"Apparently not," Reddington murmured.

"The fire," Liz breathed. "He was a part of all this. Who is he, Red?"

"Don't ask me that, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth Phelps bristled at the words. "No. This man has my mother. The mother that you've refused to tell me anything about. The secrets are done. Who the hell is he?"

Reddington moved, pulling out a slip of paper and handing it to Cooper, who in turn shot him a questioning look. "If you have the location, why aren't you sending your people in for her?"

"Your team made the public connections when it came to the Cabal."

"And you know this guy," Jacob said quietly from his place, dark blue carefully guarded, "and he knows you. You need us because he doesn't know what this team will do."

" _You_ called _me_ , Agent Phelps," Reddington snapped, the irritation strange coming from him.

"I did," Liz corrected. "Don't redirect. Who is Erik Belov?"

"The man that has your mother." Reddington murmured, looking more uncomfortable than Ressler had ever seen him. He couldn't help but feel like he was listening in on an increasingly more private conversation.

"I'm going to find out."

Reddington shifted and sighed. "He is also more dangerous to you than anything you've ever come across. Elizabeth, I understand that you will likely not heed my advice here, but-"

"No," she answered him icily. "You don't get to try to scare me away from this. We're going after her with the task force."

"That doesn't mean you need to be anywhere near it."

"Not your call. I told you that you needed to trust me, but every time you choose to hide pieces of the truth. Important pieces. I'm going in with people I trust." She turned, fury rolling off of her in waves and left the rest of them standing there, the public display leaving the room chilled.

Cooper cleared his throat, starting to give instructions and reminding them that hostage situations were time sensitive. Ressler inched closer to his partner so he could speak quietly. "Jake, listen, I know she's trained and everything, but nothing about this sits well."

"I know," Jacob murmured, glancing back to where his wife was bending over Aram's shoulder to look at the information he had pulled up. "But Liz has always wanted a connection to her biological family. Katarina's her chance. Maybe this DuPont guy too. She just… needs answers."

Ressler nodded slowly. He didn't have to like it, but he did have to trust his partner's judgment. And if he couldn't quite manage that, he at least needed to have his back if it all went to hell.

* * *

Extractions weren't her specialty, but Liz was certainly getting her share of practice lately. If anyone was bothered by the display between she and Reddington, no one said so. He was providing extra feet on the ground and intel moving in, because it wasn't like they could fight him too, though Liz did mention that the box could have held him well.

Jacob had stayed mostly silent, even if she knew he wasn't thrilled about this. He would be more comfortable with the team going in as opposed to just Reddington's men, and in the end, the the goal was getting Katarina Rostova out.

They moved in, Liz, Jacob, Ressler, and Samar matching Dembe, Baz, and a few others. As they split off into teams of two, she could feel Jacob matching her steps as if he weren't willing to risk letting her out of his sight. She brushed her shoulder against his, catching his direct attention and her eyes flickered to meet his. "Do you trust me?"

"You know I do."

She offered him a tight smile. "I'm good for this."

"I know."

His voice was steady, but she knew he wasn't entirely convinced. She knew him too well, and, truth be told, he knew her too well. Family, outside of him, was in uncharted territory for her.

After a moment Liz nodded and they moved together down the hall, clearing it. Gunfire could be heard in the distance, at least someone in their team having been found. She picked up her speed as she rounded a corner and nearly ran directly into an armed guard.

Liz ducked, bobbing under the swing the man took, and used the momentum and surprise to wrench his gun upward hard and the shot went off. He fell, dead before he hit the ground, just to reveal another man behind him.

The shot went off, making her jump, but the guard went down with his buddy and Jacob stepped up next to her, tilting his head in the direction they'd come from. "Looks like we may be going the right way."

She nodded and they moved forward through the hall, guns drawn and tension high. They met three more guards and heard Samar clear the westernmost corner of the building through their coms, Ressler announcing that they had secured the eastern. Liz glanced back once at her husband, his face nearly unreadable, and they both ducked back behind the wall on either side of the hallway that branched off, voices drifting from that direction.

Liz pressed her back against the wall, zeroing in on the footsteps and gripped her gun. She and Jacob moved together as the people rounded the corner. Four guards had accompanied Andres DuPont - Erik Belov, she reminded herself - and she swung around, a bullet taking one out and a second coming at her in full force. Belov took off down the hall and she barely dodged a blow while distracted.

Jacob threw a hard elbow into her attacker. "Go," he managed. "I've got these. Get him."

She didn't have time to argue or even thank him as she ducked away, forcing herself to trust that if he didn't think he could handle them that he never would have given her the option. He was putting his faith in her ability to handle the situation like the professional she was. It wasn't easy for him, she knew, but he was doing it. She needed to do the same for him.

Liz took off down the hall after Belov, swinging around a corner to find him at the door. "Hey!" she called out, a shot going off and the bullet skimmed close enough for him to halt his escape. "Next one goes in your head. Where is Katarina Rostova?"

Belov turned slowly, hands visible, and he smirked a little at her. "Hello, Masha."

"Where is she?" Liz snapped.

"I knew you'd come for Katarina. You and Reddington. Quite the team you two make, don't you? You know that your mother isn't one that often needs rescuing." He tilted his head a little. "You've changed so much, but I'll admit this does feel familiar."

"The only thing you should be saying is where my mother is," Liz growled. "I'm not above putting the first one in your leg as encouragement."

"Or my chest," he answered with a shrug, but then paused, his gaze focused in and studying her. "You don't remember, do you? You've blocked it out." He waited a moment and Liz felt uncomfortable under the steady, icy gaze. "Reddington had stolen you away. From your mother. From me. He'd taken you away from us and, in the end, turned you against us. I can't imagine he's willing to tell you that, though. He's always been fond of his secrets, of twisting others the way he wanted them to go. Look at me, Masha. Really look at me, past the scars, and tell me you don't know me."

Liz swallowed hard, her head beginning to pound against memories threatening to break through the dam. She blinked hard, her vision tunneling dangerously as she found herself standing in a room filled with flames at the same time that she stood in a hallway with her gun drawn on her enemy. It was like a living nightmare, and as the gun went off in her hand she wasn't sure if she could believe it or not. Her knees went weak and gave way, sending her crashing to the floor.

"Lizzie? Lizzie, babe, what happened? Are you hit? Liz, look at me!"

Jacob's increasingly panicked voice dragged her fully back to reality and Liz looked up at him. He was knelt next to where she had collapsed, worry shining unmasked in his eyes, and his palm pressed to her cheek. She hadn't realized she was crying until she felt his thumb gently wiping at tears. "I'm okay. I'm not hit," she managed.

"You're shaking. Let me see. Come here, let me see."

He thought she was in shock, and maybe she was. She didn't fight him as he checked her over, not satisfied until he was certain she wasn't bleeding. Her husband moved back into her line of sight and she reached out numbly to him, her spinning mind finally registering that he was bruised and bleeding from the fight. "Babe-"

"I'm okay. Don't worry about me. What happened here?"

Liz looked over to where Belov had been standing to find the place empty. "He got away," she breathed.

"We've got Katarina, and we'll get Belov, Liz," Jacob promised softly. "Hey? You sure you're okay?"

Her gaze had been fixed on the door again and she blinked. "I need to talk to Red."

"Okay…" he murmured, uncertainty lacing his voice. "Why?"

"I remember."

"Remember what?" he asked gently.

She turned to look at him and her gaze hardened. "Everything."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Apologies for the delay in this. Still working through some of the kinks of wrapping up the story, but I'm hoping to have them all worked out in my notes now, so as long as I have the time (work has been a little crazy at points) I should be writing more steadily to the end.

As a bit of a side note, especially after the reveal in the finale: while Belov and Kirk have many similarities (kind of cool that it worked out that way, especially because Belov was conceived before Kirk came onto the show), this _is_ an AU and it will not follow that exact storyline. I had to make certain calls when I reached the Katarina arc and this was one of them. Hopefully Belov will be just as intriguing as Kirk.

Next time - Liz remembers what happened the night of the fire, Ressler gives Reddington a bit of advice about trust, and Reddington drops yet another piece of the puzzle on Liz.


	58. Chapter 58

**Chapter Fifty-Seven**

Jacob stared at her, uncertain what _everything_ meant. Without warning Liz was on her feet and barrelling down the hallway. It took half a beat for him to turn and follow, struggling to keep up even with his height advantage. He didn't dare try to stop her though. He knew better than to get in her way when she got like this.

They made their way to the rendezvous point where Reddington had already come in and was speaking with Katarina very quietly and very seriously off to the side. She didn't look too worse for wear, considering. A few bruises were starting to show, and Jacob saw the stubborn look that Liz got whenever she refused to lose an argument. It was very similar to the one his wife wore at that moment as she started towards Reddington.

"You lying son of a bitch," she growled dangerously, catching his attention. Jacob reached for her on delay and missed as she dodged him, making a beeline for Red and she landed a hard punch to the jaw of the fourth most wanted man in America. It was a solid enough blow to send him stumbling back a couple of steps. "My father! You sent me after my own _father_ without-"

"I wanted you _away_ from this, Lizzie," Reddington reminded her roughly.

"Don't you _dare_ call me that!"

Jacob snapped forward, his arms going around her before she did something they all would regret. He held on tight as she thrashed against him, wincing as her elbow slammed into his already bruised ribs in her struggle. He pulled her close, speaking directly into her ear. "Babe, breathe."

"No, he set all of this up. He-"

Jacob could hear the tears in her voice even before she stopped struggling, sagging a little in his arms. Whatever she had figured out was about to be put on display for everyone to see. Their team, Red's team, and Katarina Rostova, who looked almost as pained as Reddington.

"Masha," she said softly, stepping forward, "Raymond-"

Liz turned her vicious glare on her mother. "I remember. _Everything_. The fire, the gun…" She was trembling again, spiralling, and Jacob was at a loss on how to slow it down. "I shot him. My own father. He told me my father was dead, but seemed to have missed the part where _I_ killed him…. Or that I didn't. That' I just tried to!"

Reddington pulled in a long breath and pursed his lips together. "Elizabeth," he said carefully, looking as if he were very aware of the audience they had for what likely should have been a private conversation, "I had hoped - foolishly, perhaps - to protect you from this."

"So you lied to me. You…" She shrugged out of Jacob's arms and turned towards Katarina. "How could you protect him? He took me away, didn't he? He…"

"It's not that simple," Katarina murmured and stepped forward. It was the most gentle Jacob had seen the woman yet, and for just a moment he actually saw a mother reaching out for her daughter.

"Then tell me," Liz managed, her voice desperate. "Why is it so difficult for you people to understand that I was always going to figure it out? That this-" she waved to the room of silent people that had come to rescue Katarina- "didn't have to happen."

Reddington and Katarina exchanged glances. "Not here," Red said quietly.

"Right here. The whole truth, or this is done."

"These people don't need to hear-"

" _These people_ have been more honest with me than both of you put together."

Jacob risked a glance over to where Ressler and Samar both stood impassively. If Aram was still listening over the coms, he didn't say a word. Silence stood between and Liz nodded. "Fine. Katarina, you may not want to be honest with me, but Jacob's and my team just helped rescue you. You owe us. They'll escort you into the Post Office so that you can tell the FBI everything you know about Erik Belov. You may not feel like you owe me the truth, but you owe it to them. They just saved your life."

Katarina swallowed hard. "I'll tell your friends what they need to know."

"Well look at that. Someone can," Liz grumbled, throwing her hands up as she turned for the door.

"Jake?"

Jacob turned, feeling exhaustion weigh on him. "Yeah?"

Ressler's lips thinned out and he took a moment to answer. "Go home. She doesn't need to be near this. Neither of you have slept all night, and…"

"And she needs time to process," Jacob agreed. "I'll have my cell if you need me."

"And I'll… Let you know what she says," Ressler said quietly. "Good luck."

"Thanks," Jacob murmured, glancing over to his wife. Her momentary mask of calm was ready to shatter and he needed to get her out of there. "We're going to need it."

* * *

He wasn't entirely sure why he was there. It wasn't like he could keep Katarina from telling their secrets even if he wanted to. She was in the interrogation room with Samar and Donald, the two agents going over everything they thought they needed to take down the final pieces of the Cabal. That left Raymond Reddington lingering pointlessly in the Post Office.

The morning had brought the main staff back into the building, rummaging around and irking him with their prying eyes and their chatter. He moved into Agents Ressler and Phelps' office, finding it empty just as he had hoped, and picked up the framed photo on Jacob's desk. Elizabeth smiled brightly at the camera, but if he squinted just right he could imagine she was smiling at him. That she could forgive him. She had said she would, but he'd known that once the truth was out, there was no way that she could. No one could have, not after what he had done. He wasn't sure if it hurt more knowing she was really his, now, or if that blood connection added any weight at all. She had always been his in one way or another. He had always loved her more than life itself.

It wasn't as if she were dead, he reminded himself as he touched the photo carefully. She was alive and she would smile again. It would just be without him. Once he knew she was safe from Erik, he would choose her above himself. He would walk away and give her a chance for the life she wanted so badly. If nothing else, perhaps he could do that for her at least.

"Hell of a night."

Reddington looked up to see Donald Ressler at the door of the office. He set the photo down as nonchalantly as he could. "Donald, I should thank you and your team for-"

"I haven't had enough sleep or coffee to wade through your BS this morning, Reddington," the FBI agent said gruffly.

"I'm not sure I follow."

Ressler snorted. "I have a pretty good natural lie detector. Knowing Jake for the last decade has just sharpened it. So just this once, don't insult my intelligence."

Reddington chuckled softly. "Well then."

"Listen, I don't pretend to know half of what happens with you and the Phelps'. Jake plays things close on a good day, and you have added to the bad ones since dropping into their lives. The thing is that he - and Liz, I'd bet - don't like being kept in the dark. They're picky about who they trust, and you've proven again and again that you don't trust them enough to tell them the full story. I can't give you advice on Liz, but I know Jacob Phelps, and there are two quick ways to piss him off: try to manipulate him or screw with the very short list of people he actually cares about. You're doing both right now, pal."

Reddington stared at him for a long moment before an amused chuckle left him. An exhausted and irritable Donald Ressler was very interesting indeed. "He believes I am, perhaps, but there's nothing to do at this point. I could only do what I felt was best for Elizabeth. What I felt would protect her. Sometimes there are no good choices to be made, Agent Ressler."

"That's such a load of crap," Ressler huffed. "You just didn't want to face what did to her. Same reason she didn't come clean to Jake until she had to."

The older man quirked an eyebrow. "When did you become so observant?"

"Just because I don't stick my nose in the middle of things doesn't mean I don't see it. Jake is my best friend and he loves Liz. Stop jerking them around." He shrugged, loosing a frustrated breath. "Tell them the whole truth. Worse case is she still walks away from you, but at least they know exactly what they're up against."

"I'll consider your advice, Donald. Thank you."

"Somehow I doubt that," the younger man grumbled. "Listen, Rostova is actually giving us useful information about this Belov guy. We're going to regroup and we're going to get him. Anything you want to add just speeds the process up and takes him down faster."

"I'll speak with Harrold before leaving."

Ressler nodded and turned, leaving Red alone again. His frown only deepened as he closed his eyes. She deserved the truth, he knew she did. She had always deserved so much more than he had been strong enough to give her.

* * *

The water was hot against her bare skin, but it helped to wash away at least a fraction of the disgust that she felt clinging to her. It wasn't physical, but it might as well have been. She had been a fool to trust him. She had thought - had _felt_ \- that she had a connection to Reddington that she couldn't explain. It had taken a while, but she had found that she wanted to trust him, even when he proved to be untrustworthy at every turn. She was the fool, really. She knew what he was, which was someone like her. People like them weren't honest by nature. They couldn't afford to be.

Liz loosed a long sigh as she shut the water off and reached for the towel. Maybe she just needed to believe he could be better than that. If he could, maybe she could find hope that she wasn't simply fooling herself as she tried to be better.

She was still towling her hair off when she crossed into the room to find Jacob sprawled out of the bed, facedown, and seemingly unmoving. Fear gripped her for just a moment before she zeroed in on the steady way he pulled in a breath and released it. He wasn't asleep, but he probably wasn't entirely awake either. They were both exhausted and, from what she had been able to tell, he'd taken a beating while she'd chased Belov.

The name tore at her suddenly and for just a moment she thought she would be thrust back into the flames again, the smoking gun in her small hands, and her own father's blood soaking the floor. She needed to focus on something else. Someone else.

Jacob stirred as she climbed on the bed with him, her touch gentle as she ran her hands along his back. His muscles tensed and he turned over. "Hey," he greeted a little roughly. "I didn't hear the water shut off."

"You were about half asleep," she answered, leaning down as he turned over so he could see her. She kissed him almost immediately, her eyes drifting closed as his hands came up to the side of her face and tangled in her hair. It didn't take long before he had pulled her down on top of him and rolled, the two of them never really breaking as she held on. She felt safe with him. Whole. This was what she wanted, she reminded herself, and with him Reddington, Katarina, and everything else could fade.

"Lizzie?"

"Hmm?" she managed as he kissed the crook of her neck and sent chills down her spine.

He stopped then, leaned over her with a serious look on his face. "Hey," he said softly, leaning in to press a long kiss to her lips. "Talk to me?"

"I don't want to think about it right now."

"Babe…"

Liz sighed, the breath coming out as more of a huff. "Way to ruin the moment," she tried for a tease and he gave a small smile before kissing her again. She thought maybe he would let it go, and maybe he would have, but her thoughts were filled with flames and shouts and death again. He seemed to catch the subtle change and he eased to his side, waiting until she was ready.

They laid there for a long moment, neither saying anything, until Liz turned to look at her husband. "When I was talking with him, when I was standing there with my gun aimed and warning him I'd put one in his head, it was like I was somewhere else."

Jacob shifted a little next to her. "What do you mean?"

"I could see him," she answered slowly, "but I was also standing in the burning room. The people were shouting again, but I was holding the gun. Then the shot went off and it was like everything clicked into place." She pulled in a steadying breath and felt Jacob's hand find hers by her side. She gave him a weak smile. "Katarina and Erik were arguing about Red. He had… stolen me. I don't know why. I trusted him, though. I can't remember a time without him. He was… special to me."

"You've said you were four when they found you wandering around without your memories," Jacob murmured softly. "Is it possible these, coming back to you like they are, are jumbled?"

She squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't know. All I know is that I killed him. I thought I'd killed him. No wonder I blocked it out."

Jacob shifted and carefully pulled her into his arms. She leaned in, wrapping her own arm around his middle and pressing her forehead to his chest. "I really am a monster, aren't I?"

"No," her husband breathed, kissing the top of her head. "You were just a kid."

"That's my point," she answered sharply, sitting up and looking down at him as the desperation began to sink in. "I was a kid and my go-to to end a fight between my parents was to shoot my own father. What kind of child _does_ that? What-" Her husband sat up and pulled her into his arms again, and Liz felt the sob bubble up. "You were right. Some things are better left buried."

He sighed, but didn't say anything. She wasn't even sure that's how she really felt, because even as the words had tumbled from her mouth she was still so angry at Red from keeping this from her. It was infuriating and she was angry. Images and pieces of memories jumbled together like a mirror someone had dropped straight down. The pieces were broken, but still left in a general order. It was more than she'd known in a very long time and she just wanted to forget it.

"We'll get through it," Jacob murmured after a long moment. "Nothing needs to be figured out right now. Not Belov or Katarina or Red. Let's get some sleep and we'll figure this out together, okay?"

"I don't know who to trust," she whispered, voice breaking.

"Me. You can trust me." He tightened his hold on her and she scooted closer. "You're not alone, Liz. I promise."

She nodded and held onto him. For a little while, at least, she could feel safe. "You're the only one I can trust."

"I'm not going anywhere," Jacob promised. "You've got me. Whatever you need."

"You. I just need you," Liz said as he shifted so she could lay against his chest. She felt his fingers against her hair and her eyes drifted closed as she listed to the steady sound of his heart beneath her ear. In everything that had happened, he had been steady, and she was now more certain than ever that without him, she would have drowned beneath it all.

* * *

Jacob woke some hours later, finding Liz curled on her side of the bed with Hudson flopped across her legs. A smile perked his lips and he laid there for a long moment just watching her. She was so peaceful, even if for just a while longer. One glance over to the clock showed that the alarm would be going off in half an hour anyway so that they could sleep that night. If he timed it well, he could have some food nearly ready by the time she made her way downstairs.

Carefully he eased himself out of bed, feeling the ache already starting to set in from the nasty fight the night before. He was bruised all over from his three-on-one scuffle, his neck tender from where one man had gotten his hands around him. His fingers explored the tender skin as he padded down the stairs, pausing at the door as he passed.

A figure stood outside, not knocking or even reaching to, but Jacob would have known that fedora topped silhouette anywhere. He sighed, pulling the first door open and reaching for the second. "Reddington."

"Agent Phelps," the Concierge of Crime greeted, fingers working almost nervously at the folder in his hands. He didn't say anything more, though, and Jacob sighed, stepping out of the way in a silent invite. It wasn't like he was often given the choice, and it looked like he was at least there for a more professional reason.

Reddington stepped inside and looked around. "Is Elizabeth-?"

"Asleep. What do you need?"

The older man snorted at the question. "The one thing I don't deserve," he answered very softly. "I suppose it's best. She likely doesn't wish to see me right now anyway."

"Caught that, did you?" Jacob snarked, almost regretting it at the fallen expression the other man gave. He had a torn opinion of Raymond Reddington. Years of hunting him, followed by working close, followed by the man saving his wife's life made for a twisted emotional response at best. He'd never been great at working through his own emotions on a good day, much less when they were so convoluted.

Reddington hummed softly and extended the folder. "I suggest you burn this once she's read it. I… Please tell her that when she asked, I truly thought I was telling her the truth."

"What is it?"

"The real truth. Perhaps not the whole truth, but that is a complicated story. Should she ever…" He gave a mirthless laugh. "I shouldn't promise things I may not be able to live by. Please tell her that I was always trying to protect her. What happened was not my intent. My only wish was to protect her."

Jacob swallowed hard as he took the folder. He had never seen Reddington so raw before. He watched as he turned to go, lingering by the door as if he were battling with himself for a reason to stay.

"I'll tell her," Jacob promised and watched a man that he would have shot on sight just a few years earlier leave his home, a strange sense of finality left in his wake.

"What'd he leave?"

He looked up, finding Liz standing at the top of the stairs. "Just this. And he said everything he did was to protect you."

"Amazing what people can justify to themselves by saying that," his wife grumbled and started down. She reached out for the folder and he handed it over.

"He said something about what he said being true to his knowledge at the time. Not sure what he meant."

Liz peeled the folder open, her eyes scanning the page. Her expression remained carefully neutral, but just below it Jacob could see the subtle hint of surprise. "What is it?"

"A paternity test," she whispered, her voice giving more away, and when she looked up he saw it in her eyes. "Mine."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: So, Everything Back to You will be coming to a close relatively shortly. I promised myself that I would work on my novel once I came to the end of this, only writing on a few one shots here and there. The problem is the hiatus. Every hiatus my brain does this terrible thing where it just continues forward on the story because it refuses to accept that I have to wait _months_ for it to be released. Usually this results in a multichapter that turns into an AU once the show starts back up. I have a collection of thoughts and scenes that could very easily turn into this type of story. The beginning would likely be very dark, though, with Tom being held by Kirk and used against Liz. The general idea of the story would be their escape, and then Tom starting to work with Halcyon. The decision I'm going to have to make is if I think I can pacify myself with oneshots along the general line of my ideas or if I should just go ahead and write on both  my original novel and poke at the AU. Any thoughts, since you guys are my readers? :)

Next time - Liz confronts Red and the Phelps' get a call about the little girl that they're adopting.


	59. Chapter 59

**Chapter Fifty-Eight**

Liz stared at the information Red had left her and she wasn't sure how to feel. He hadn't known, even if true, was an answer she couldn't accept. Not secondhand, certainly.

She moved to the door, flinging it open and barrelled outside the second, leaving Jacob inside as she started for the car that was still parked off the street. Dembe glanced from the driver's seat as she tapped hard in the front window and it rolled down. "Give us a minute?" she asked, her voice much more pleasant than she expected. "Jacob's inside if you want to wait there."

Dembe glanced to the backseat where Liz saw Reddington nod. "I'll let you know when we're finished," he murmured.

The locks on the doors popped up and Dembe stepped out, leaving Liz to slip into the back seat and all but throw the paternity test paperwork at Reddington. "What part of dropping this off with my husband and running seemed like a good idea to you?"

Reddington stared at her for a long moment from behind his aviator sunglasses. "I was under the impression you didn't want to see me."

Liz shot him a glare that caused even him to cringe. "I'm pissed, Red. Pissed because you and I have been to hell and back with this while Cabal mess. You've saved my life, we've had each other's backs, and at some point this dance needs to stop. I want to trust you, but you have to give me a reason to."

"Is that not what that is?" he asked, looking genuinely confused.

"A piece of paper saying you and I are blood related after you told me we weren't? No. That doesn't cut it, Reddington. I want the truth. Not pieces, not what's convenient. The truth. If there's one thing I've learned about all of this, it's that you don't get to pick and choose. That's not how the truth works."

Reddington swallowed hard, but never broke eye contact with her. After a long moment he pulled in a deep breath and began to speak. "I met your mother when I was still in Naval Intelligence. We were young and dangerously attracted to one another. I had already married Carla, but I rarely saw her. Our marriage was one of a more political nature in the beginning, though I was fond of her, and when Jennifer came along…." He sighed again. "As life does, things got complicated. Katarina was tied up with the Cabal, the man I had met her through was trying to pull me into its ranks, she and I had a rather dangerous love affair right under Erik's nose, the whole time with her explaining it away as trying to draw me in for him."

"Was she?"

A small smile tilted his lips. "Perhaps it started that way. It's difficult to say with Katarina." He shifted in his seat. "Then she became pregnant with you. It was… not the best timing it could have been. Erik was questioning her loyalty to him, and as you can see, he has a tendency to be possessive. She didn't want to keep you at first, fearing what he might do, I suppose."

Liz watched him for a long moment, finally letting a question tumblr out. "Why did you say that you weren't my father?"

"When your mother first told me she was pregnant, she made it very clear that the decision was hers on if she would keep you or not. I assumed - foolishly and naively - that if you were mine she would have at least given me a say. I was as much the _other man_ as she was the _other woman_ for my own marriage, so it wasn't a stretch to believe that you were Erik's and that that was where the fear stemmed from." He closed his eyes and leaned back against the headrest. "It never mattered, Elizabeth. Mine or Erik's, you were special from the moment that I knew you existed."

"You called me Lizzie. Since I was little," Liz murmured, the name dancing across her mind.

Red hummed a soft affirmative. "Elizabeth is, on your birth certificate, your middle name, but I was always fond of it." He turned to face her again. "The Soviet Union was falling apart when you were very young. Erik grew increasingly more unstable as the Cabal put pressure on him, as did the KGB. Your mother had been trusted with many secrets during her tenure there - many because of her relationship with Erik - and she worked together with Leonard Caul to put the Fulcrum together. It was supposed to be an insurance policy, but Erik found out. I took you and left Moscow."

Liz let the story sink in for a moment. "Why would you take her one protection from her?"

Reddington snorted and shook his head. "She hid it in that toy you loved. The bunny. I didn't realize until she came for you with Erik and the Cabal on your heels."

"Why didn't you take her too if he was so dangerous? Why didn't you…" She swallowed hard, feeling her emotions spun dangerously.

"I couldn't risk her tipping Erik or the Cabal off. I'd hoped to bring you here and get you settled before trying to find an option for Katarina. I have an old friend, Sam, that could have taken you. Katarina's father also lives here in the United States, though Erik would have likely looked there."

"I remember…." Liz closed her eyes, searching her fragmented memories. "I remember you coming into the apartment and taking my hand. You told me we were going on an adventure."

Reddington chuckled. "And you asked me if there would be dragons."

"You said maybe," Liz murmured with a smile. It faded and she opened her eyes again to look at him. "The fire."

"Erik was out of control. Your mother and I argued, Erik came in to take you, and…. The fire started, you somehow found a gun… Everything imploded all at once, quite literally, and the roof came in on us. I told you to run and you did. I didn't see you again until that night I spoke to your husband about his… reservations about joining Harrold's task force. You had no reason to trust me then. As far as you were aware at the time I was simply the man that had nearly killed the man you love."

"But that wasn't you," she murmured his defence. "Red…"

He forced a smile, though she saw the pain in it, his hands balled into anxious fists against his knees. "You told me that you could forgive me, Elizabeth, but the truth is that I took you away from your mother and I still couldn't protect you. Heaven knows I tried, but-"

She reached over covered one of his hands with her own. Slowly his relaxed out of its death grip and she caught his gaze. "Thank you," she said seriously.

"I've done nothing for you," he murmured brokenly.

"You trusted me with the truth. For people like us, that's everything."

"I never wanted you to be like me, Lizzie."

"I wouldn't trade my life for anything. It led me to Jacob, and, eventually, back to my family that I thought were gone."

"I don't deserve forgiveness."

"Tough," she murmured, her voice a little teasing despite the heaviness of the moment, "because I care about you, and our story isn't done yet."

* * *

Reddington didn't stay long once he and Liz finished their chat in the car, and Liz shared the details of the discussion as Jacob put together their dinner, listening quietly to the story his wife had been told. As she finished he set the plate down in front of her and leaned against the bar, the words swirling in his mind, but not quite making it past his lips.

"Go on," she urged and he chewed on his bottom lip a little.

"Okay," he said slowly. "So he wasn't lying to you, Katarina was lying to him?"

"Or let him believe the lie, but yes."

Jacob nodded slowly. "But she told him, and he went and got it checked. Do we want to know how he ran a paternity test in you without consent?" His wife frowned a little and he snorted. "So he runs it, confirms it, and drops it off because you told him to take a hike."

"He's not lying, Jacob."

There was something so certain on her voice that it killed any argument that he had set up. He loosed a breath and quirked a very small smile. "Are you seriously telling me Raymond Reddington is my father-in-law?"

Liz watched him for a long moment, and he could see his wife trying the gauge how serious he was. Finally she rolled her eyes and swatted at him. "Yes, we're a screwed up little family."

"I have no idea how we're going to explain this to Bruce and Kelly."

"Same way you told them I was Masha Rostova?"

Jacob frowned. "That included pretty much a complete shutdown on my part. Might want to find a different route."

Liz echoed his expression. "Fair."

He ran a hand through his short hair and circled around to take a seat with her at the bar, his appetite gone. After a beat of silence between them she reached out and covered his hand with hers. "Hey," she coaxed softly, "I know this isn't… what we had planned, and I know it makes things a thousand times more complicated-"

"Liz-"

"Just wait," she said softly, pulling his hand up to press a kiss to his bruised and battered knuckles. "I just need you to know that you're my family. You and our little girl we're about to adopt. All of this… Reddington, Katarina, Erik…. All of them, no matter what my birth certificate says or what-"

Jacob stood and leaned forward, abruptly ending his wife's explanation as he kissed her. It took half a beat, but Liz's hand moved slowly to the side of his face, her fingers brushing against his hairline as they moved to the back of his neck. "You're my family," she breathed out the promise again when they finally broke.

"And you're mine. I trust you, Lizzie, and I know how much you want to know them. If that's how you want to move forward, I'm going with you. You won't have to choose. Not because of me."

"I love you," she whispered, the words sounding much more like a promise to his ears. She wasn't going anywhere and neither was he.

He pressed another quick kiss to her lips before shifting back to his chair, their fingers still folded around each other between them, and he cracked a very small smile. "I love you too. Always good to hear it though."

"For both of us," she acknowledged.

"Do we have a plan or is Reddington asking for blind faith again?"

Liz sighed and took another bite of her food. "He said he's checking into a few things and will read us in. Luli has been tracking Erik's money to Monarch Douglas Bank in Warsaw."

Jacob tilted his head. "You say that like it has a meaning I should know."

His wife's expression split into a grin. "It actually has a little bit of a reputation in certain circles. They keep the money for some of the real big timers in the criminal world, but no one has ever been able to crack their formula that they use to keep everything safe. It's impressive, really."

"They won't freeze his accounts for us," Jacob murmured.

"No, but I think that's what Red is checking into. As soon as he has the information he'll hand it over to us, we have the case, and the task force is on our way to Warsaw."

Jacob's cell phone began to buzz and he reached into his pocket. "That was fast," he chuckled, but saw Aram's name scrawled across the screen instead of Red or Cooper's. He slid thumb across the screen and put it to his ear. "Hey, Aram."

" _Oh good. I was worried I'd woken you guys up after last night. I didn't wake you up, did I_?"

"Nah, we're awake. What's up?"

" _Oh! Right. Sorry. Molly is in labour._ "

Jacob blinked hard. "What?" he managed, scrambling from his chair. "She wasn't due for another week!"

" _She's okay, just a little early I guess. The doctors don't seem worried_."

He pulled the phone down. "Molly's having our baby," he whispered, the grin impossible to keep from his face. Liz jumped from her place, calling for Hudson who looked like he was getting a quick trip to the side yard. Jacob pulled the phone back up to his ear. "We can be there, right? I mean, she's-"

" _Yes. Definitely. That's why I'm calling. I'll text you the hospital address_."

"You're awesome, Aram," Jacob half laughed, his mood entirely lifted from the earlier conversation. Everything might be in chaos, but their baby girl was on her way. "Thank you."

He ended the phone call and the next few minutes were a blur of changing clothes, making sure that Hudson was set, calling Kelly and Bruce, and making sure any last minute details were taken care of. Jacob felt his head swirling as he stood in a room that, while the furniture was put together, hadn't been fully decorated or situated yet. They'd been so busy. Everything had sort of fallen in around them, and now their child was on her way. He stood in the center of what they had been changing over from the guest room to the baby's very gradually between near-death experiences. All at once the fear swirled around him, threatening to drag him under. He had thought he had gotten control of this, but now, in that moment, the weight was pressing down on him. He and Liz were about to be responsible for this tiny, innocent little thing. It was terrifying.

"Babe, you ready?" Liz called and Jacob saw her stick her head into the room from his peripheral vision. "Jacob?"

He blinked, jolted out of his thoughts and he looked over. "We haven't even decided on a name yet," he managed, his voice shaking a little.

"Oh Jacob," Liz murmured and crossed the space between them. She didn't hesitate as she wrapped her arms around his middle and pressed her cheek against his chest. "You're going to make an amazing dad."

"How do you know?"

"Because I know you. I know who you are and how deeply you _can_ love. You and me, we're in this together. We'll give her everything we didn't have as kids."

"How are you so calm about this?"

"I have you."

The swirling storm building seemed to settle a little, and he found her looking up at him with so much certainty that he didn't think he could question it even if he wanted to. Right there, as the waves of uncertainty threatened to drown him, she was acting as his anchor, and somehow, he was hers. They would do this together. "I love you," he whispered.

"I love you too, and don't worry. We'll know her name as soon as we meet her."

He nodded slowly and Liz tipped up on her toes to kiss him. "Your parents are going to meet us there. Let's go meet our little girl."

It was well into the night before Molly had the baby, but that didn't seem to matter. By the time the little one came into the world the entire team had shown up to wait with the Phelps'. Audrey even brought Elliott with them and Kelly spent the hours practicing her best grandmother routine.

Finally, though, Liz and Jacob were allowed to go back. Molly was doing well and the little girl was crying and healthy. They had her cleaned up and Jacob watched with more than a little awe as they handed the little one to Liz. Her expression was so open and hopeful that a part of him felt more than a little absurd for all the worry. They were a team. She would pick up in places he fell short and vice versa.

"You want to hold her?" Liz asked.

Jacob found the little, sleepy bundle being passed to him. She blinked up at him, her gaze a little unfocused, and he adjusted her in his arms very carefully. "Hope," he murmured.

"Hmm?"

"Her name. I think we should name her Hope."

Liz leaned in next to him, pressing a kiss against his shoulder. "That's perfect. See? Told you you'd be good at this."

He felt a smile tug his lips and he rocked her carefully. She couldn't have been more perfect. Their family couldn't be more perfect.

* * *

Once Liz had handed Hope over, she wasn't sure she'd ever get her back. Jacob's entire demeanour changed and she watched her husband - a man that she knew first hand exactly what he was capable of - melt at the sight of their newborn daughter. The doctors wanted to keep her for a couple of days to make sure everything was in order, but the team got to see her, meet her, and Liz and Jacob were camped out in her little room with Hope snoozing peacefully in the bassinet.

A knock came at the door and Liz looked from where she had been watching the little one sleep, finding Red with his fedora in hand stepping in, a tired but real smile on his lips. "I heard. May I meet her?"

Liz saw Jacob stiffen in the chair he was in. "You're the one that didn't want her in our lives."

"And now she's here, Agent Phelps, and…. I'd very much like to meet my granddaughter." His voice was hesitant and his gaze, though he had called Jacob's name, was focused on Liz. It was her permission he cared about.

She pulled in a deep breath and stood, scooping her from the bassinet, and moved towards him. She didn't hand her daughter to him, but she did bring her over to meet. "Her name is Hope."

"Hello, Hope," Reddington greeted, his smile broadening, and for a moment it was hard to believe that the man was on a most wanted list. "She's beautiful."

"We're pretty proud already," Liz murmured.

"As well you should be. Has you mother been by?"

"I haven't told her yet. Jacob's family is here and-"

Liz caught the movement behind Red and the Concierge of Crime straightened and flashed a bright smile at Kelly Jones. "Hello there. You must be Jacob's mother."

Kelly looked a bit like a deer in the headlights, which was a very odd sort of look for a woman that Liz was pretty sure she had never seen flinch. She had been steady all through the realization of who Liz really was, and had accepted her without needing to know all of the classified details. Now, though, she stood staring at Red like the devil himself had come up out of hell.

"Kelly," Jacob called out as he stood. He started towards his mother, guiding her out of the room even as Hope started to fuss in Liz's arms.

"I know who that is, Jacob," she snapped, jerking out of his light grasp. "That man nearly cost me you. How could you let him anywhere near your daughter?"

"It's complicated."

"There are many complicated things in your life, Jacob Phelps. _He_ isn't one of them. He had you shot and-"

" _Mom_ , we're waking Hope up. C'mon. I'll explain what's going on."

Jacob was all but pushing her out of the room by then and Kelly glared at Red. "If you lay one hand on my daughter-in-law or granddaughter-"

"Hey," her son coaxed as Liz rocked Hope gently. She loosed a sigh at the muffled sounds from the hall after the door had been closed.

"Well she's lovely," Reddington grumbled sarcastically. "I suppose your husband never passed along the knowledge that I was not, in fact, responsible for his near death."

"We don't talk about you with his parents. You're kind of classified."

"I suppose so," Reddington huffed.

"He'll smooth it over with her. He's good at that." Hope was fussing loudly now and Liz bounced her a little until she settled down and she could feel Red watching her. "I never thought I'd be a mom," she confessed softly. "Not before I fell in love with Jacob. I hope you know… What you told me means a lot-"

"But he is your family. I'm aware, Elizabeth."

She gave him a thin smile. "Time. It'll take time."

He hummed softly. "Something that we're short on."

"Do you have an update?"

"No, though I should shortly. I delayed my flight when I heard little Hope had been born. I take it that her biological mother is doing well?"

Liz nodded. "She is."

Red smiled fondly at the quieted little one. "Enjoy your time with her, Elizabeth. Once I've confirmed my suspicions about the bank, things will move very quickly."

"Good," Liz answered. "The sooner we wrap this up the sooner Jacob and I can focus on just… Being her parents."

"That's my hope for you, Lizzie," Red promised as he turned. "I'll be in touch. Give my regards to Jacob's mother once she's settled down."

Liz snorted, but her smile was real. "Red?" she called, stopping him in his tracks. "Be safe."

"You as well."

If he passed Jacob and Kelly in the hall, Liz didn't hear the commotion. Instead she was left with a few minutes alone with Hope, the little girl drowsily looking up at her until she fell back asleep.

The door to the room opened and Jacob peeked in. He waited for Liz's nod before he moved in. He was alone, but Liz could read the stress in her husband's features where no one else would have been able to. He moved immediately for Hope and Liz handed her to him, watching their baby girl stir in her daddy's arms but never quite wake. Jacob cleared his throat and spoke softly. "Kelly is going over to the house with Bruce to get things ready for Hope."

"You okay?"

"Hmm?" he asked, never quite looking at her. "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Jacob."

"It's complicated. We knew it'd be complicated. Kelly is just trying to protect us and she feels like I've been lying to her. I guess I have."

"It's not like you can broadcast that the task force works with Red, and she's always known that your work is classified."

"She thinks the lines between work and life have blurred too much recently."

Liz moved to where he was standing, reaching up to touch his arm. "What do you think?"

He gave her a smile. "I think that we knew it was complicated. She'll adjust, and… And we have Hope. Nothing can ruin this day."

She leaned in and pressed a kiss to his shoulder, not arguing the point. If only for a brief moment, they needed to find their peace where they could.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Kelly just sort of took on that scene with Red. It wasn't really planned, but there it was. I know one or two people that follow my Tumblr account and saw me talking about it while I was writing the scene have been looking forward to that, so I hope it lived up to expectations.

Next time - Jacob and Ressler go to Warsaw while Liz finds herself needing to protect both her new daughter and mother-in-law back home.


	60. Chapter 60

**Chapter Fifty-Nine**

There were many reasons that Reddington had discouraged the adoption, though the main reason had been the looming situation with the Cabal, Katarina, and Erik Belov. The dangers that the Phelps' faced alone were tremendous, and to bring a child into that had made no sense to him. Reasonably he knew that they had, perhaps, not understood the risks, or perhaps they had simply decided that if they continued to wait until the waters settled they would never have a family of their own. It had been the argument he himself had made to Katarina once, so it was not so farfetched that Elizabeth would come to that conclusion about her own child.

It was strange, because Red had been certain that you could never hold a child so dearly as he had Lizzie, but little Hope had worked her way in with no effort at all. He hadn't managed to see her again after his rather tense moment with Jacob's adopted mother, but her little face, her eyes, and those tiny little fingers wrapped around Liz's were etched into his memory. She was perfect in every way, and his granddaughter made what he needed to do next exceedingly more difficult.

The Post Office was quietly buzzing with the sounds of teams working on bringing down Erik Belov when the doors to the lift opened. Elizabeth and Jacob Phelps strode in, both looking tired but put together, and he offered them a nod. "I'm sorry to take you away from your daughter."

"Taking down Belov keeps her safe," Jacob answered. "That's a priority."

Reddington nodded. "Then you will have no problem going to Warsaw to speak with Matthew Strickland."

Jacob blinked hard. "What?"

"Warsaw. Poland."

"I've already told you that Navabi and I are going," Ressler said as he crossed the bullpen. "There's no reason Jake needs to leave his little girl right now."

"Protecting that little girl is why he needs to be there. I have a project for the talented Agent Navabi to get us to our goal, and Donald, you will need Agent Phelps' own unique talents in handling this situation." He turned to look at the now-irritated agent. "If you wish to protect your daughter and your family, you'll go to Warsaw."

Liz frowned at him. "You're keeping things again."

"Often," Red answered with false cheer, "but I will protect your family, Elizabeth. With every resource I have."

She studied him for a moment before nodding slowly. Jacob sighed. "Okay, loop us in."

"Strickland is the EVP that you will be working with. He's agreed to meet with you in person."

Ressler snorted. "For what? To tell us that he's not going to release any information to us? We can get that on the phone with him."

Reddington resisted the urge to sigh. "Contrary to what you seem to believe, my goal is not to separate the Phelps family. The bank's records are untraceable because of a formula they use. Of course, they won't tell tell their clients what that formula is, so we have to find alternative means. Agent Phelps-"

"I can spot the lies without giving it away," Jacob sighed, but at least he was on the right track.

"The bank is headquartered out of New York, so we have jurisdiction," Cooper stated. "We find the accounts, freeze them, and push Belov out."

"And where will you be?" Elizabeth asked.

"In Warsaw, handling my end. If all goes as planned, we will have everything sorted and you and your husband may focus on little Hope until your heart's content."

His smile didn't waver and finally she sighed. "Alright."

"Good. I would offer you gentlemen a seat in my plane, but I imagine it's best if we don't enter the country together."

Ressler rolled his eyes, but Red waved it off. Let Donald throw a tantrum. This was falling together and they were going to bring Erik down once and for all.

"Red?" He turned, finding Elizabeth looking at him intently. "Katarina. She hasn't been by, but I can't imagine she doesn't know. Where is she?"

"Your mother handles things in a very unique fashion, Lizzie. Her focus is on Erik Belov and keeping you safe. Once it is handled, she will likely reach back out."

"She thinks this is her fault?"

"In a way it is. In a way it's both of our fault. All of our fault. Katarina, Erik, and I have a very convoluted past. One that I wish you didn't suffer from. I'll ask that you won't fight the protection I'm leaving with you. I know that you can handle yourself, but with Hope-"

"Fine. Just… watch yourself, okay?" She shifted her weight and it looked like it took quite a bit to force herself to look him in the eyes. "It may be complicated, but you're family too."

The words pulled a smile from him. "Thank you, Lizzie. This isn't over."

"Not by a long shot," she answered with a smirk. "Watch your back. Watch Jacob's and Don's, even if they grumble."

"I assure you they will."

"Wouldn't be them otherwise."

* * *

"I don't get how you're so chilled about this," Ressler said as he shut the overhead compartment. "I'm still having trouble leaving Elliott."

Jacob looked up from his phone and blinked. "Well it's not like I'm happy about it, but if everything goes right we'll be on the return flight home tomorrow with Belov's finances frozen and my kid's going to be just a little safer without her nutcase almost-grandpa looming in the shadows."

Ressler found himself chuckling at the phrasing, despite how serious it was, as he took his seat for the long flight. He could see the subtle tension there just beneath his partner's carefully constructed mask of calm. They had talked about everything that had come crashing down around them with Reddington, Katarina, and Belov, but Ressler had the distinct feeling that even Jacob and Liz didn't have all the pieces of information. As he always did, Reddington held tight to the full story, even if he'd given more than he usually did.

"Okay, what're you thinking?"

The ginger agent looked over, a little startled out of his thoughts. He pulled in a long breath and slowly loosed in back out. "I just can't help but think Red's playing at something he's not telling us. Like we're just the pawns in this bigger game of his. Liz and maybe Hope by extension may be the only ones he's not willing to sacrifice in all of it."

Jacob closed his eyes briefly. "Of course he isn't telling us everything. That's why you and I have each other's backs."

"Your mom talking to you yet?"

"She never stopped. Kelly's just…" He sighed. "She's some sort of really pissed and really worried. She knew Liz when everything went down, so it was a lot easier for her to wrap her mind around just a really screwed up situation."

"And Kelly has a soft spot for troubled pasts," Ressler said pointedly and his partner chuckled.

"Yeah she does."

Ressler shifted. "To be fair, we almost lost you in Vienna, and I know the evidence seems to point more to Berlin on that than Reddington, but…. It's a hell of a grudge to let go of."

"You have."

"I've learned to work with the man. It's a little different. I don't trust him, and with him around Hope… I don't know, man. As a dad, I get it. I get why she'd be nervous."

Jacob sighed and cracked an eye open. "Believe me, I know. Red, Katarina…. They're dangerous. Even if they don't mean to be, but Liz…"

"They're her family," Ressler sighed.

"We knew it was going to be complicated when we decided to stick it out."

"Complicated is an understatement, pal. Good thing you two love each other."

Jacob's expression melted into a smile. "Yeah."

Ressler shook his head and chuckled. "Just be careful, alright?"

"You worried about me?" his friend teased, but Ressler's response was serious.

"Yeah. I am. I've got your back, but you've got to let me."

Jacob's teasing smile faded into one a little more real and he nodded. "Thanks, Ress."

He snorted. "Anytime."

* * *

Hope was wailing and Liz wasn't sure what was wrong. She had fed her, changed her, and was currently rocking her as she paced through the townhouse with Hudson at her feet, nervously following her. She just wouldn't stop and Liz felt helpless.

A knock came at the door and Liz nearly jumped. She could see her mother-in-law's silhouette outside and she shifted Hope carefully to open the doors. Kelly stepped in, glancing behind her at the dark SUV directly in front of the Phelps home. "Are those agents?"

"Yeah. Cooper's idea. Well, I think Jacob may have asked for them."

"I don't blame him," her husband's mother answered. "I'm sure you can handle yourself, but-"

"It's for Hope," Liz agreed. She sighed, the little girl still fussing in her arms.

"May I?" Kelly asked, reaching for the little one.

Liz eased her over. "I keep wondering if we did the right thing. With everything that's happened just recently, were we completely selfish to bring her home?"

"She's your daughter. Where else would you take her?" Kelly asked with a smile as Hope started to settle. "You and I both know blood doesn't make family. Jacob wasn't going to risk losing her to the system if you both backed out last second, even if you were trying to protect her. Sometimes you make hard choices and do the best you can."

Liz loosed a long breath. "How do you not hate me?" she asked tiredly.

Her mother-in-law smiled. "I'm actually pretty fond of you. Jacob… You know he can have a hard time expressing or even knowing how he feels sometimes. You're the first woman he's ever felt comfortable with. And, boy does he love you." Her smile grew a little. "That should have been the first sign that things would always be interesting."

"I know Red-"

Kelly snorted, but she didn't wake the snow-sleeping baby in her arms. "You two will make the decisions you need to there. All I ask is that we don't do any joint family dinners."

Liz nearly burst out laughing and Kelly looked at her from the corner of her eye. "It's complicated, but there's something to be said about family, especially when you've never known yours. Jacob found his through us, and through you. He'll stand by you, and while Bruce and I may see Raymond Reddington as someone who threatened our son, we'll trust the decision you both make. You certainly have more pieces of the puzzle than we do."

"You'd think so," Liz sighed.

"Well, I don't even know where they've shipped Jacob off to this time, so at least you have that."

Liz offered a thin smile. It wasn't much when she just wanted them all home and safe, but it would have to be enough. She knew that Jacob wasn't any happier with being away from them at that moment than she was with it. They had to do things they didn't like to protect their daughter.

A movement caught her attention and she stepped towards the window. "Did you talk to the agents on your way in?"

Kelly looked over at her. "I had to show my ID before they would let me near the house."

Liz busied herself with the curtains, discreetly glancing towards the unmarked SUV outside of her home. "Kelly, could you please take Hope into the closet under the stairs. There's a bunch of boxes, but there's a door just past them that leads down to the basement."

Her mother-in-law tensed. "What's wrong?"

"The agents are dead."

"You should-"

"Please don't argue with me," Liz said sharply. "We don't have time. I'll come get you when they're gone."

Kelly looked like she might argue again, but clutched Hope to her and started for the basement. Liz loosed a breath and reached for the drawer with her gun, ready for the fight that was about to happen.

The sound of glass breaking in the back door caused her to whirl. They were halfway in when her first shot went off, taking the intruder down. Another followed him and a bullet pinged close, shattering frame of a photo as Liz took cover.

She pressed her back against the wall, closing her eyes hard to focus in. She heard boots coming through and over the dead body half in her dining room. The first one came through the opening and she swung around, her elbow catching him hard and she immediately followed with a hard kick out. He stumbled, she shot, and he fell. Liz didn't waste time as she leveled her gun and fired again.

Glass shattered behind her and Liz hissed in pain as the bullet clipped her shoulder, leaving it burning long enough that one of the attackers came through the front window and slammed her against the wall, wresting the gun away. She threw her weight back, kicking out at the person coming for her from the front, and both she and the man who had a hold on slammed back with the momentum. They landed hard and Liz rolled back, landing on her feet half a beat before he made it to his. He grabbed her by the collar of shirt and she slammed around hard, forcing him back and he released her, sending her tumbling to the floor.

Liz's fingers closed around her discarded gun and she put a bullet in his chest, spinning on her knees to do the same to the man just getting to his feet. Her gun have a telling click and she moved to take the fight in close. She didn't get the chance as he pitched forward, falling face first into the carpet with a bullet hole in his back.

Katarina Rostova motioned behind her and Liz turned, bobbing down and landing a low blow against an attacker, swinging the gun up to catch him in the jaw and sending him falling back.

"We need to go," Katarina said firmly.

"Not without my daughter," Liz managed, starting for the basement door and nearly stumbling over the dog that seemed to appear out of nowhere now that the chaos had settled. Hudson whined at her feet and Liz stared at him. "Jacob's right. You're a terrible guard dog," she told him before grabbing his leash and tossing it to her mother. She inched down to the basement to find Kelly with Hope clutched to had and Liz let out a sigh of relief.

"Are you alright?" her mother-in-law asked.

"For now. We don't have a lot of time. We need to get Hope's stuff together and get to some place safe."

Kelly nodded. Liz took Hope from her and they moved back up the stairs. Katarina already had a few things gathered. "I have a safe house-"

"No. We're going to the Post Office." She glanced back at Kelly, who was staring at the wreckage and Katarina both. Liz loosed a breath. "Kelly, my mother: Katarina Rostova. Katarina, this is Jacob's mom."

The two women stared at each other as Liz leaned down to sit Hope carefully in her car seat, pulling her phone out to call Cooper as soon as she was strapped in. _This_ was going to be fun to explain.

* * *

The flight had been long, and there was something less than comforting about touching down to the news that his wife, their newborn baby girl, and his mother had been attacked while he was oblivious over the ocean. All Jacob wanted to do was to wrap this investigation up and go home. He had thought he was okay with leaving them, but he had only been fooling himself.

"You alright?" his partner murmured as they followed the bank employee to the back offices.

"Just thinking through all the ways that we could end this bastard when we get him." He glanced over and offered Ressler a smirk. "By end I mean through in jail, of course."

"Uh-huh."

The employee opened the door for them and Jacob let the mask of calm fall a little more firmly into place as they stepped inside of the office. Matthew Strickland was standing with another man, speaking quickly and quietly in Polish, so that Jacob could only catch bits and pieces. Not that Polish was one of the languages that he tried to keep up on, but he knew a little bit. It was something about a _formula_ and he referred to a _she_ a time or two. Someone watching this formula? Maybe, but if so, Jacob thought by his tone that she wasn't doing a very good job of it.

Strickland turned with a broad smile. "I apologize, gentlemen. Please, have a seat."

There were a lot of things Jacob was willing to do for his job. He would risk his life, he would go toe-to-toe and take the person out if need be, and he would cross lines most people weren't comfortable with to get things done, but sitting and listening to a banker prattle for forty-five minutes on why he couldn't actually do anything for them was insufferable.

Finally, Jacob snorted and straightened from where he'd been slouched down in his chair, suit that was so rarely practical in the field wrinkled, and he ignored Ressler's warning glare as he spoke. Half of his purpose there was to call the man on his bluff. "Listen, you haven't said one honest word since we sat down, Strickland."

"I've given you everything that-"

"No, you haven't. You've given us what you wanted and nothing past that."

Strickland opened his mouth to protest, but his gaze shifted behind the two agents and Jacob caught movement out of the corner of his eye. A man moved in, past them, and straight for the EVP to speak directly in his ear. A panicked expression flickered across his face and he stood. "Gentlemen, we will have to pick this up at a different time. I'm afraid that there is a situation that demands my immediate attention. Please speak with my secretary on your way out."

Jacob watched as he all but ran out of the office, growling to the man at his side in Polish. Dark blue eyes had just turn to meet his partner's own lighter set when his phone began to buzz in his pocket. "Phelps," he answered as he pulled it to his ear.

" _Agent Phelps, I do hope that your visit was as productive as mine_."

"What the hell does that mean?" Jacob growled, his temper getting the better of him.

He could hear Reddington chuckle from the other end. "It means that while you two were speaking with the necessary parties, Agent Navabi and I were obtaining the formula they are so very proud of."

"So what? We were the distraction?" His temper was boiling now. He could have been home with his little girl, but Reddington had been determined that his unique skills would be needed.

" _For that, yes, but now the real fun begins. I'll have Dembe text you the rendezvous point. Make sure you aren't followed_."

The line went dead and Jacob resisted the urge to throw the phone. "I'm going to kill my father-in-law."

Ressler snorted. "Why am I not surprised?"

Jacob's phone buzzed in his hand and an address flashed across it. "Let's just finish this and get home."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: For those of you who don't follow me on Tumblr, I just wanted to say that I've finished the writing on this story. The full length is 62 chapters long, so while we have a few chapters left to be posted, you'll see it start to wrap up. You guys have been so amazing to stick this insanely long story out. I love hearing from each and every one of you :D

I may have start on a hiatus piece... I told myself I wouldn't, but apparently that was a lie. I have no idea when it will start going up, but hopefully not too long after this story finishes posting. I also have a couple one shots in the queue, so just because EBtY is almost done doesn't mean that there won't be Keen2 writing :D

Next time - Ressler and Jacob are introduced to the bank's 'formula'.


	61. Chapter 61

**Chapter Sixty**

The address led Jacob and Ressler to an apartment off the beaten path. Dembe met them at the door and they found Reddington, Samar, and a woman they didn't recognize inside. The woman looked up immediately, nervously, and Jacob felt certain they were about to pass into uncomfortable territory.

Reddington stood from where he had been speaking to her cheerfully and turned. "Good evening, gentlemen. Ms Tomczac, these are Agents Phelps and Ressler. They're the fine FBI agents that I told you about."

"What's going on, Reddington?" Jacob demanded, voice sharp, but the Concierge of Crime's smile didn't fade.

"This is Kaja Tomczac, an employee of Monarch Douglas, and also, apparently, the keeper of a rather sought after secret."

She shifted uncomfortably. "My employers are funneling money through the bank for multiple illegal sources. Mob bosses, weapons and drug dealers-" her gaze shifted to Reddington for the briefest of moments - "and others. It's untraceable because of the method they use."

"And what do you want from us, Ms Tomczac?" Ressler asked and Jacob saw the barest shift in her expression. She was terrified, but he didn't think it was of them, or even of Red. She was terrified of the people she was about to sell out.

"Protection. I can give you the account information of any criminal we move money for, but I need you to take me to America. I need to know that your FBI will protect me if I do this."

Jacob and Ressler exchanged looks and Reddington chuckled. "Not _my_ accounts of course. That's already been taken care of. Though Erik Belov has had no such warning."

"How did you know to reach out to Reddington?" Ressler asked, his pale gaze shifting to the man in question.

"She didn't. Agent Navabi, Dembe, and I relieved her from her captors. We've been negotiating on our end as best we can, but Agent Navabi has said that there's some protocol that needs wading through." Reddington waved his hand. "That tends to go to you, Donald."

Jacob snorted at the irritated look on his partner's face and shook his head. "Ress, you get the green light from Cooper. Samar and I can find our path out." He looked over to his wife's father and shook his head. "This is why you needed me here. Your escape path."

"You have proven yourself very adept at finding your way through things most wouldn't."

"We'll need private transportation to get her out and separate from our own."

"I should be able to accommodate that," Redington answered cheerfully.

Samar set a map down on the coffee table and Jacob leaned in as she spoke. "Members of law enforcement here are bought and paid for by the bank, and there's no way to tell which ones are and which aren't."

"We're on our own, huh?" Jacob asked and she gave a short nod.

"They likely already know I'm gone," Kaja said softly.

"This isn't your first time trying to slip away, is it?" Jacob asked carefully and she shook her head.

"They've tightened security. I wouldn't have slipped away this time without Mr Reddington and Agent Navabi."

"We're still not out of the country," Samar muttered.

"Cooper is making a few calls," Ressler said, but he didn't look happy about it. He didn't like being kept in the dark any more than Jacob did. "What are we looking at?"

"A lot of complications," Jacob breathed if we don't move quickly. Cooper will give us the green light. Let's get her out, take her back around-"

"They'll block the path off here if they're working for the bank," Samar cut in.

"How do you know that?" Jacob asked curiously and she gave him a knowing smirk. Jacob rolled his eyes. "Mossad gets all the fun."

"We need to check on your definition of fun, Jake," Ressler said from where he was looking out the window. "Red, do you have people around the parameter?"

"Not as many as I would like," Reddington answered and moved to look at what Ressler had seen. "There's a more discreet exit down the south stairwell."

"Dembe and I can take the north and give you some time to get her out," Samar offered.

"Sounds good. Watch your back."

Reddington set his hat on his head. "I'll have the plane standing by as soon as you get her there. Agent Phelps-"

"Just make sure everything is ready," he answered sharply. "We've got our end of it." He turned, not giving Reddington a chance to say anything more as Kaja joined them and they started for the stairwell.

* * *

Jake had always had a _better to ask forgiveness than permission_ sort of attitude when it came to ops that drove his partner a little crazy. Add Reddington into the mix, Samar acting like it was the most normal thing in the world, and the drive to get Erik Belov by any means necessary, and Donald Ressler found himself complicit in what would likely be seen as a kidnapping at best and an international incident at worst.

The sound of heavy footsteps could be heard just below them and the two FBI agents flattened themselves against the wall, pulling Kaja with them until it passed. Well, at least Ressler had found himself with Jacob. There wouldn't be any miscommunication, even if he wasn't entirely comfortable with what was being communicated.

Kaja looked terrified, and as they moved forward, Ressler spoke quietly, trying to get her mind off of it and make preparations all at once. "How do you have access to the accounts? Is there something we should let our technician know about?" He reached out to stop her short as Jacob moved forward to clear the hall before they continued.

"No. Once I'm free, they won't be able to access any of it. All of the information is in my head."

Ressler stared at her. "What do you mean?"

"Clear," Jacob issued from the other end and Ressler nudged her forward.

"I have an eidetic memory. I can recall every second, every inch of a moment. Recalling the routing numbers of a few accounts is easy."

"Why would they trust one person with that?" Jake asked as they paused to look out a window for an idea of what they were up against once they got to the street.

"They paid me very well, and what money couldn't cover, fear of the wrong people finding out did," she said quietly, and Ressler thought there was a fair amount of guilt in her voice. The woman was terrified of the place she had landed. He wondered just how she had gotten into something like that in the first place. It didn't matter, not really. All that mattered right then was getting her out alive.

"Looks like one scout down at the exit in just the wrong spot," Jacob said lowly.

"You want to flip for it?" Ressler asked with a small smirk and his partner snorted.

"No. It's my turn. Just don't miss."

"I scored higher than you did on sharp shooting. You remember that, right?"

"By the smallest margin that it barely counts," Jacob huffed.

Finally, Ressler's smirk broke into a grin. "Still counts. Don't get yourself shot."

"Counting on you to make sure I don't."

"What's he doing?" Kaja whispered as Jacob slipped down the hallway and Ressler moved to the window, carefully prying it open and praying it wouldn't make a sound.

"Distraction. We don't have the shot from here, but we're not going to risk taking you down there and the guy coming around the corner."

"Why not just wait until you have the shot?" she asked nervously. "What if your partner gets hurt?"

"He'll be fine. He knows where to line him up. Jake's good at getting people to do what he wants. It's one of his talents that's either really useful or really irritating, depending on what side you're on."

"Couldn't we just wait until the man moves into range?"

"We could be here all day."

Ressler got himself in position. They had used this plenty of times when in tight spots chasing Reddington down. That seemed like ages ago, and now they worked with him and we're still using the same tactics. Well, it worked. Most of the time.

Their man shifted and started towards the door, lining up the shot. Ressler took it and watched the man crumble. Jacob moved forward and waved the all clear.

"We need to move fast."

Kaja nodded and Ressler took her down the final flight of stairs and Jacob was motioning to a cab. Apparently his partner knew enough Polish to at least give the address. Typical. Ressler really needed a list of the various languages Jacob kept up with.

Ressler's phone buzzed and he fished it out of his jacket pocket. "Cooper cleared it."

"We knew he would," Jacob murmured, but then the corner of his mouth twitched upward. "Feel better now?"

"Shut up."

The cab ride was surprisingly uneventful, but Ressler was hesitant to even think that too loudly. Reddington looked unhappy where he stood waiting, and Dembe met them at the cab to direct Kaja to the plane. "Something has come up," the Concierge of Crime announced, "and my stay in Europe will need to be prolonged. The plane is ready to go, and I'd appreciate it, Agent Phelps, if you would escort her in so that we don't lose time."

Ressler frowned. "What's going on?"

Reddington's own look darkened a little more. "Elizabeth was attacked. This needs to be dealt with without delay."

Ressler glanced at his partner. He knew that Jacob had known, but it didn't look like he was going to be sharing that information with Red. More than likely he had just assumed the older man knew. It was an oddity that he hadn't.

"Baz was injured and Katarina took her time contacting me. They are all fine. Your mother was there. Apparently they are all at the Post Office until this is finished. Your family is safe, Agent Phelps, but I thought I would offer you Agent Navabi's seat on the way home."

Jacob looked back and Ressler offered him a thin smile. "Go. Samar and I will have things covered here."

"Thanks," he breathed. "I owe you."

"Let's just catch this son of a bitch. Maybe it'll make all of this chaos worth it." He wasn't really sure that anything could make this chaos worth it, not on the personal level that it had touched them all. The fact that they had even gotten close to Kelly and little Hope made Ressler's blood boil, so he could only imagine how Jacob was feeling under his mask of calm he had been wearing since Liz had called him with the news. He just hoped putting Belov away would be enough.

* * *

Hope Phelps was being cradled by her grandmother as the little girl's mother spoke with Assistant Director Cooper. It was strange to think of it that way, in that this Kelly woman was the little girl's grandmother, yet Katarina wasn't sure she could call herself by that name. She was Masha's mother and Hope was Masha's daughter, but the former spy found it difficult to think of herself as Hope's grandmother. That would imply that she expected or hoped for some sort of continuing family connection after this was over. She had already burdened Masha enough with her just her lineage. Perhaps it was best not to force that on Hope as well.

"Have you met her yet?"

Katarina blinked hard, startled out of her thoughts. "I've been… out of town."

Kelly shot her a look that said that she knew it was more than that. Katarina had done her research on her daughter's husband. He was a delinquent at best until finally finding a family that had been willing to keep him. Past that, she knew nothing about the woman. She was the adopted mother of her daughter's husband. That, and Hope seemed to like her better.

Almost immediately as Katarina reached for the little girl she began to wail. Her nose crinkled and her eyes squeezed closed, tears at the corners as she pitched a fit that turned heads. Kelly didn't pull back, though, and Katarina held her close, bouncing her a little in a way that had always eased Masha as a baby, and the newborn quieted down.

"You almost look like you've done that before," Masha said softly as she approached.

"It's been a while, but old habits. She's beautiful."

Masha looked exhausted, but her smile was warm and she leaned forward to press a kiss to her forehead. "When this is all over I'm talking Jacob into a real vacation with just the three of us. No one trying to kill us, no one to arrest, just him, me, and Hope."

"That sounds perfect," Katarina murmured.

"Have to deal with this first," her daughter huffed. "Kelly, Bruce is out of town for the conference still, isn't he?"

"I never thought that I would have been grateful for that," she sighed.

Masha gave a short nod and started digging in her pocket, pulling a buzzing phone from it. "Hey, babe," she greeted. "We're okay. We're all okay. We're still at the Post Office. No, Hope and Kelly are fine. It's been stressful, but everyone is okay." She paused, turning away, but Katarina could still hear her. "Well at least that's some good news. I'll see you when you get here. Be safe."

"I'll take some good news," Kelly murmured.

"Jacob's on his way home and this is moving forward. I need to go talk to Cooper."

"We've got Hope," Kelly assured her and a small smile tilted her lips. "And Hudson."

Masha sighed, the dog's tail starting to thump against the floor at the mention of his name. "Thanks."

Katarina watched her daughter walk towards the stairs and shifted her hold on the little girl that she had been entrusted with. Masha had been that innocent once, and now she was fighting harder than ever to give her own daughter a chance to stay that way. This newest little addition tilted the scales in a way that they couldn't have predicted.

* * *

He wanted to be on a flight back to DC to personally oversee both Elizabeth and her daughter to a safe house. It wasn't that he was under the delusion that she would go without quite a bit of convicting - convincing that her husband simply wouldn't do - but Reddington had every confidence that he could have gotten it done.

The problem was that he couldn't be in two places at once, so begrudgingly he had chosen to trust Jacob to do what needed to be done to protect his family. There were a lot of things that Red could delegate, but this was not one. He needed to send a message, and he needed to do so personally. Belov's money was gone, and now those that aligned themselves with him would understand that he could not protect them.

"No, this needs to be fixed _now_."

Reddington's gaze drifted over to where Laurel Hitchin was growling at someone over her phone, her composure barely in place as she sat at a tiny table outside of a Parisian bistro. He moved almost lazily around, taking a seat across from her and gaining her attention instantly.

"Fix it," she said again and ended the call, her gaze never leaving Red's.

"Hello, Laurel. Did Erik promise you that I would be dead by now?" He chuckled at the way she stiffened. "You really do have very poor judgement when choosing sides. First Peter now Erik. I do wonder how you've gotten as far as you have."

"You're not going to kill me in the middle of a crowded place," she said in a tone that sounded just as much like she were trying to convince herself as him.

He offered her a smile. In truth he hadn't decided. The best option would be to cart her off to a secure location, but a part of him - a part that was just a little reckless and a lot angry - wanted to kill her then and there. If nothing else he would enjoy the look on her face.

"You're responsible for the bank, aren't you? Reddington-"

"You were a fool to think, after i brought your organization crashing down, that I wouldn't do it again."

"I work for the American government-"

"That is incredibly skittish of all things Cabal right now. The evidence against you - which would have remained in the dark as long as you were loyal to me - is being broadcasted in the US right now. With Monarch Douglas' less than reputable branch down, not only is your money inaccessible, but so is your protector's, and from the look on your face you realize that without his money, he cannot pay off the right people. All of the world politicians, the Interpol connections he would have paid off, or anyone else… It's all gone, Laurel. It's just you, me, and the decisions we make between us in this moment. Isn't that nice?"

Her gaze darted around, as if she were looking for help and found none. Slowly she placed her hands on the table and leveled a glare at him. "You think you have this won, but you don't have him, and you won't. Killing me does nothing to protect her."

"It does everything," Reddington said firmly and fired one shot under the table, the suppressor keeping the sound muffled. "It sends a clear message that Erik is incapable of providing the protection he promises."

He stood slowly, Laurel Hitchin staring at him with wide, disbelieving eyes as her brain struggled to process what he'd done. Reddington was halfway down the sidewalk when the commotion started and he heard cries for help behind him as he slipped around the corner. Everything was lining up nicely. Erik was without his finances and would quickly lose his support around him, it would bring them face to face. Reddington was determined to finish it this time.

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: This is going to be my last update before Sunday, so I want to remind everyone that doesn't know yet: the Tom Keen Appreciation Week starts on Sunday with 'Favourite Daddy Tom' moment to honour Father's Day. If you don't have a Tumblr, you can still pop over there and enjoy all the edits and such being posted. You can find me over there under takadasaiko [dot] tumblr [dot] com

As for EBtY, we're wrapping up. Only two more chapters to go! I'm still a little freaked out over that. I'm hoping that everyone's going to enjoy the ending as much as I enjoyed writing it. I will be continuing to post one shots (if you haven't had a chance to look yet, I posted one earlier this week. Reviews get super slow during hiatus, so I never know if people have actually seen it or not) as they come up. I'm still poking at that hiatus fic too to see how it goes. 

If you guys want to see certain one shots to be added to the Truth in the Lies collection, just let me know. I'll take prompts :D


	62. Chapter 62

**Chapter Sixty-One**

He had stopped by the townhouse on his way in to pick up extra diapers, a change of clothes, and anything else they needed. The living room was a wreck, and the realization that this was becoming a pattern was not lost on Jacob. The last two years of life had been nonstop chaos. Reddington's appearance in their lives had kickstarted it, leading them from one dangerous situation to the next with lies, manipulation, and truths all sprinkled in there. Good and bad both had come from it, but as they moved forward the landscape of their lives had changed so much. They weren't just responsible for themselves anymore.

The lift opened into the Post Office and the first thing that Jacob Phelps saw was his mother - a woman that he preferred didn't know the gritty details what sort of terrible things her son saw every day - cradling Hope in her arms and talking with Katarina Rostova, Hudson at their feet with his tail thumping against the floor. Jacob blinked hard at the site of the two women and his little girl sitting at an empty desk in the war room, FBI agents all around. As he drew closer he saw that Katarina was looking over a file, but she looked up as he approached. "Masha - Liz - is speaking with Cooper and Mojtabai on a piece of intel that just came in."

"What's that?" Jacob managed, setting the bags of baby supplies down next to his mother and Kelly immediately handed Hope to her father. The little girl stirred and blinked up at him, pulling a smile from him no matter how strange the whole situation was.

"Laurel Hitchin is dead."

That pulled his attention around to his mother-in-law. "How?"

"How do you think?" she asked coyly.

Jacob loosed a breath, shaking his head a little and bouncing his daughter when she continued to stir. "First the money, then the message."

"This is happening sooner rather than later."

"Are you okay?" Jacob asked, the questioned aimed at his own mother.

"As okay as I can be given the circumstances," Kelly answered.

There was an awkward pause, Jacob preferring privacy when he knew he'd get little. At least Katarina seemed to understand and she cleared her throat, standing from her seat. "Your director will want to see you when you're done," she said as she started off for the stairs and towards Cooper's office.

Jacob grimaced. "Listen, I-"

"I'll watch Hope while you and Liz are finishing this, but…" She closed her eyes, pulling in a deep breath, and when she opened them again the look she gave her son sent chills down his spine. He hadn't seen it since he'd been a teenager, fresh into her home and willing to push every limit to the breaking point. "Jacob, you know that I don't get into the middle of your job or even the decisions you make in your life. You're an adult and as much as I love you, all I can do is hope you'll make the right decisions, but that little girl in your arms there? She can't defend herself like you and Liz can. You two made a choice to bring her into your lives. You need to finish this in whatever way it needs to be finished."

Jacob stared for a long moment. He hadn't been sure what he had expected from Kelly, but he didn't think this had been it. She was watching him with such a steady, unblinking gaze that he swallowed hard and looked down at Hope. "I know."

She reached out, her hand on his arm drawing his attention back. Her expression has softened just slightly and she squeezed his arm. "Not to say that you didn't," she said softly. "I just worry about you. And her now too."

Jacob quirked a smile. "Me too."

"Phelps," a shout came from above and Cooper motioned for him to come up.

He nodded, pressed a quick kiss to his daughter's forehead, and handed her back to his mother.

Cooper was seated at his desk again by the time Jacob entered, with Katarina, Liz, and Aram around it. Ressler and Samar wouldn't return on their commercial flight for another couple of hours, but it sounded like they didn't have the luxury to wait.

Liz looked around from where she was seated. "Hey."

"Hey," he greeted with a small smile. "You okay?"

"I'll be better once Belov is off the playing board."

Katarina straightened at that. "The only way to take him off permanently is to kill him."

"The bureau is not in the business of assassinating people," Cooper answered automatically.

She tilted her head, her expression curious. "That's funny, because my daughter's husband and his partner's little band tried to put a bullet in Raymond's head in '08. What would that be if not assassination, Agent Cooper? I promise you that Erik is worse than Raymond ever could be."

"Regardless," Liz cut in, "of how it happens, he has to come off the playing board."

"Are you really comfortable killing a man that you thought was your dad?" Aram asked hesitantly from his place.

"I'm comfortable with whatever I need to be comfortable with to protect my family."

"Even if we go in with the intention to take him in, we can't limit ourselves to that," Jacob said as he leaned against the arm of his wife's chair. "He's willing to kill us, so taking that off the table is the best way to make sure that he takes us out first."

"The goal is to capture him alive if possible," Cooper pressed. "This _will_ end here. We have found that this hole goes just a little deeper one too many times, and forgive me if I don't take Red at his word that it doesn't."

Jacob risked a look over at Katarina to see her bristle a little. "You don't understand what you're dealing with."

Cooper snorted. "Take a look around this room, Ms Rostova. There is not a person sitting in here that has not seen his or her share of hell over their career, and I include the two agents that are on their way. Amongst them are the best that the NSA, the FBI, and Mossad have to offer. Top of their training programs, proven in the field, and that was _before_ this task force was brought together. Not to mention your daughter with her own unique skill set. Do not presume to tell me what my team does or does not know about what we are facing. They are all capable and I wouldn't trust anyone else with the task."

The room was silent in the wake of Cooper's high praise and Jacob felt Liz shift next to him. "Katarina, if you're going to work with us, you have to work _with_ us _."_

"This is what you want?" she asked carefully.

"I want this done right. These are the people to do that."

Slowly Katarina's pale gaze swept over them and she frowned a little before nodding her agreement to Liz's terms.

"Now that that's settled," Cooper said gruffly, "what's the latest in Reddington? Does he plan on fighting this with us?"

"He said that he's on his at back and that he wanted to talk to me when he gets here." She turned, looking up at Jacob. "Did Kelly tell you that a couple agents are with Bruce?"

"Oh that'll be fun," he chuckled. "Do we have a location on Belov?"

"He hasn't left the country yet," Aram answered. "I have a flag on every known alias, and with his finances tied up he can't easily create a new one. If he so much as sneezes in public, we'll have him."

"And Reddington has made sure Belov's allies know that no one is safe," Jacob murmured.

"It should draw him out," Katarina murmured.

"It _will_ draw him out," Liz said firmly. "It has to."

Jacob dropped his hand down, fingers against his wife's arm. She leaned into the subtle touch, the support acknowledged even if she wouldn't draw attention to it. They had to see this through to the end without flinching. That was the only way left.

* * *

Raymond Reddington was an eccentric man and with that came some interesting quirks. He often chose strange meeting places that Liz wasn't always sure had a purpose behind them other than he had other business there, but when he called her he gave an address that led her to a suburban neighbourhood with a little home that hardly looked like one of his safe houses. Maybe that was the point.

Mr Kaplan let her into the house, a sad sort of look in her eyes that she didn't bother to mask. Liz greeted her and moved through, finding the house empty, like it had just been sold. "Raymond is through here."

"Is everything alright?" Liz asked carefully.

"You know it's not, dear."

"Everything's relative with that question."

Kaplan offered a thin smile and led Liz back to where Red was inspecting a doorframe that he looked like he had torn away to see what was beneath. She had seen him do stranger things, but for some reason it left her unsettled. He didn't look up at her as he spoke. "Do you remember this house, Elizabeth?"

"No. Should I?"

"You were so young," he mused. "And you weren't here long. Carla was livid, though you never knew. She treated you the same as if you were hers. I don't think she was surprised, just angry."

"You brought me home to your wife?" Liz snorted.

"To be fair, I thought you were the daughter of my lover, not mine by blood," Reddington chuckled, obviously hearing the absurdity as he spoke. "I just needed you safe, Lizzie. That's all I've ever wanted."

"I know," Liz breathed.

"Jennifer loved you. She called you her little sister. She was determined that we needed to measure your height with hers." He motioned to the doorframe and pulled in a deep breath. "Every step I have taken has been to protect you. It was an all encompassing wish that I couldn't see past to all of the flaws littered in my plans. Katarina, Erik, the fire…. And after all of it you grew up alone and-"

Liz reached out to him, her hand on his expensive jacket. "Red," she called softly, waiting until he turned to her. "I forgive you, you know that, right?"

He stiffened a little. "So you've said."

"I don't think you believe me."

"I've been told I'm slow to trust," he murmured with a sad smile.

"That makes two of us." She pulled in a deep breath and her gaze swept over the markers on the door. "We should work on that when this is all over."

Red hummed softly, his expression shifting into business mode. "For now, we have a goal at hand. Erik is trying to leave the country."

"He must have hired a plane. Where did he get the money?"

"Every good criminal keeps a stash. I'm sure you have one or two, or has being married to a federal agent put a stop to that?" Reddington mused. "The good news is that the man he reached out to to secure passage out is more loyal to me than him. I have all of the information needed."

"You going to share?"

"I had hoped to talk you out of going."

"You know that you can't."

She watched his expression fall very slightly before he nodded. "Very well." He reached into his jacket and pulled out a thin envelope. He handed it to her and, as she took it, she could feel something hard inside of it. "This is for… after the dust settles," he murmured. "It's for you and Hope. And your husband, I suppose." He gave a small wave at the last bit, but Liz quirked a smile.

"This isn't the end, Red. You know that right?"

He offered her a thin smile in return. "Time will tell."

Her expression evened out a bit as she turned the envelope over in her hand, her fingers exploring the contents through the paper. It felt like a key and perhaps a folded note inside. "Listen," she said carefully, knowing that she was treading into dangerous emotional territory. "The whole thing with Kelly will ease out. It's new to her, but Jacob's mom is one of the kindest and most accepting people I know. Once everything is done, once Belov is either dead or behind bars, she'll see he was the threat at hand and not you. She-"

"Elizabeth-"

"We'll figure it out," she cut him off, her tone sharp, daring him to argue.

Reddington nodded. "I'm sure we will. I have a few things to handle here before your team and I take Erik down. This is a long time coming, Lizzie, and the only way to keep your family safe."

"I'll do what I have to. You don't have to worry about that."

He watched her for a long moment before reaching out hesitantly. "I hope that it doesn't fall to you to make that decision. You've been through enough. I… hope to protect you from that at least."

The words struck her and she caught his gaze, trying to assess the strand sinking feeling they were causing. "What time is the flight and who did he reach out to."

"They're set to depart at two this afternoon. Roger Mattingger is the owner."

"Mattingger flies out of the area now? I thought he swore the East Coast off."

"Rarely, but he makes exceptions."

She nodded slowly. "I'll see you there." She started for the door, but paused halfway to the hall. "Red? Don't do anything stupid? Please?"

He chuckled at her. "Of course not."

Liz frowned a little, but started out the door to give him the privacy he seemed to want. She was halfway out to the car when she fished her cell out of her pocket, waiting until she heard her husband's voice before she spoke. "Babe, I need you to have Aram check something for me. I'm texting you the details."

" _Everything okay? What'd Reddington say_?"

She slipped into the car, cradling the phone between her ear and her shoulder as she tore open the envelope to reveal a key and a slip of paper with a bank name and box number on it. "I get the strangest feeling he was saying goodbye."

* * *

Kate wasn't happy with him, but she knew there was no way to stop him. Dembe would be in the same place. He hadn't dared speak too long with Elizabeth or she would have known for certain something was happening and she would have tried something. He couldn't risk it. This war had cost her too much already.

He wasn't a fool to go in as Katarina did with the hopes of simply facing him down and pulling the trigger. No, he had put Erik in a corner, taken away his protections, and was forcing his hand. When Katarina had approached him, she had foolishly thought they were on even ground. Reddington had assured he had the upper hand. He intended to use that to make sure that Erik Belov never laid a hand on anyone he cared about again.

And if that failed, the task force would be right behind him. Elizabeth would make sure of that.

The jet was already being prepped when Red arrived. He took a seat inside and helped himself to some of the scotch that was waiting, and it wasn't too long before Erik entered, his gaze falling immediately to his unwanted guest with a gun trained on him. "Red."

"Have a seat, Erik. We have a bit of time on our hands."

"Before you put a bullet in me or allow your pets to arrest me?" the former KGB agent asked warily as he moved to the seat opposite of Red, the gun still trained in him.

"I haven't decided yet," Reddington confessed. He tilted his head, studying him. There were so many things he could say here at the end. This man, a man that the woman he had loved had always loved more, had been in the way of everything, but now the one thing that had kept him from killing him instead of simply fleeing with Elizabeth was a moot point. He wasn't her father.

"You've taken everything else from me, Reddington. Why not my life?"

A smile stretched Red's thin lips at the corners slowly. "You never deserved her, Erik."

"And you do?"

"Certainly not, but I'm willing to lay down my life if that's what it takes to buy her the one she wants. Are you willing to do the same?"

"Is that why you took her? Stole her away and turned her against me? My daughter loved me once. Oh, you always had a special place, but I was her _father_."

"And the only care you had for that was to use her as a way to control Katarina. You -" Red's grip on the gun tightened - "were the one that set fire to the house when you knew they had slipped from you. In your rage, in your jealousy, you would have taken the most precious life you were ever responsible for." He straightened, his voice ice cold. "Even if you had shared her blood, you were never truly her father. A father is willing to give anything to keep his child safe. Anything. You didn't see a child, Erik. You saw a pawn."

"And that is my sin worthy of death?"

"One of many."

"Then you are going to kill me."

"Yes, I believe I am."

* * *

 

TBC

Notes: Well, the next chapter will be the last for this story. That's rather daunting after writing on it for so long. I've been checking on the loose ends and making sure that I've handled everything, which I think I have. Granted, I may go through and re-read it once it's all posted and find tons of mistakes lol. I can say this at least: I've kept up with Hudson. I worked hard for that.

If all works well, I plan to have the final chapter up on Thursday. I also found a title for the hiatus fic, so I believe that will start going up after I finish posting this story. It won't be nearly as long or complicated, but hopefully it'll do my part to help hold us over until the show comes back in September. I'm also working on one shots this summer, so if anyone has a request, just let me know :D

Next time - The final chapter to wrap everything up. Don't want to spoil the ending ;)


	63. Chapter 63

**Chapter Sixty-Two**

"I _know_ you can drive faster than this," she snapped and Liz saw her husband turn to briefly lob a glare in her direction, but she refused to acknowledge it. She knew he was getting irritated with her, but she could apologize after they stopped Red.

"He's survived this long. What makes you think he's going to do something stupid enough to get himself killed?" Jacob asked sensibly and Liz massaged at the bridge of her nose, watching the terrain pass by as he slowed to take a turn towards the air strip. The others were behind them. It wasn't as if they didn't have enough people to take Belov down once they got there, but she couldn't shake the feeling.

"He was saying goodbye, Jacob," she told him firmly. "You weren't there. You didn't hear him."

"Okay."

Liz shoved down her irritation. It wasn't his fault. Well, not driving any faster was.

They pulled around and onto the airstrip. Liz piled out, ignoring the way Jacob yelled after her. He would get the task force organized, but Liz had one goal in mind: Reddington.

She hit the ground running, the stairs still connected to the plane and the door open. Her gun was in her hand by the time she reached the top and rounded the corner to see Red sitting it's a gun in his own hand, pointed at a figure across from him. His gaze didn't waver as he spoke to her. "Lizzie, a few more moments, if you'd please. I'll have this wrapped up quickly. There's no reason for you to be here."

"The FBI is outside."

"That's nice," Reddington answered almost cheerfully and Liz loosed a frustrated breath.

"If you kill him like this - in cold blood right in front of them and witnesses - they'll arrest you. Your deal won't matter."

"True, but Erik Belov will be dead and you, Lizzie, will be free to live your life as you choose."

Liz inched forward, careful not to come too close to Belov and give him even the hope for an opportunity to escape. "I can do that with him behind bars."

"This has to be done, Elizabeth."

"No, it doesn't." There was a stretch of silence between them before she closed her eyes, steeling herself. The truth meant so much more for people like them. "This isn't about Erik Belov, Red. This is about you. This is about the choice you're making. I need… I need to know that there is one. That, even after everything, we can choose to be better. That our past isn't going to always wreck our future."

She saw the change. It was subtle, but it flashed through his eyes and worked its way into his posture. Very slowly he nodded and she leaned out the door and motioned, stepping back as the FBI swarmed in to make their arrest. Reddington lowered his weapon as soon as they had him, and they let him be where he sat. As they were dragging Belov towards the exit, though, Liz reached out. "I just want to be clear on something," she said lowly. "If you make one move towards my family - any of my family - I won't miss."

"People like us don't change, Masha. Reddington, your mother, you, and me? We're all the same."

"I'm what I choose to be," she told him firmly and turned as they started hauling him out.

Reddington stood in the aisle of the plane, watching her with a strange sort of expression. "You are so much more," he breathed after a long moment.

"So are you. Thank you."

"I've done nothing for you, Lizzie."

"You've done everything. And that? What you just did? It means everything."

"You're safe now. That has always been my greatest wish." A smile, not quite sad, but not quite happily either, pulled at the man that had turned her life upside down's lips and he swallowed hard. "You will make an amazing mother. You… and even Jacob -" her husband's name was ground out like it was forced and Liz found herself laughing - "will give Hope everything she deserves."

"We're going to try. And… you'll be there too?"

His smile turned a bit brighter. "I'll always be there when you need me."

"Good, because we're not done yet," she said with a smile. She started to turn, but stopped, whipping around before she could talk herself out of it and wrapped her arms around his neck. She felt him stiffen very briefly before returning the embrace, holding onto her like he might never let go.

* * *

She had just piled out of the SUV and Jacob had nearly slammed on his breaks then and there. Instead he loosed a curse and flipped the flashing lights on, whipping the vehicle around in front of the plane's departure path. The last thing he wanted to happen was for it to take off with Liz on board.

He shut the engine off and jumped out, barking orders at the agents that were just getting there. And Liz thought he had been driving too slow.

"Don't go in until you have Liz Phelps' say so, got it?" he yelled over the roar of the engines. He looked over to see Ressler moving towards him. "Hit every red light or just getting worse at driving?"

"You're hilarious," his partner grumbled. "Where's your wife?"

"Talking down our CI. I hope."

Ressler snorted. "If anyone could, it's Liz."

The two men watched the agents flood in, led by Samar, to take down Belov. Jacob pulled in a deep breath. "Liz thought he was saying goodbye when she spoke to him earlier."

"You think so?"

"It would make our lives simpler," he confessed softly. "A hell of a lot simpler, but…"

"Please don't tell me Reddington's grown on you," Ressler chuckled.

"You repeat it and I'll deny it to my dying breath." His gaze drifted up towards to exit where a living Erik Belov was being escorted out. "You know there was a day that I'd have put a bullet between his eyes and not flinched, but he's Liz's father. That's something I'm going to have to come to terms with."

Ressler made a small sound of acknowledgement that meant he knew nothing to say to make it better. There was nothing that he could have said. This was their life and Raymond Reddington was family. Heaven help them.

Jacob started forward, not quite pausing as Belov caught his eyes as they passed each other. He held the gaze for a couple of beats, but let him pass without a word. He didn't need to verbalize threats and he didn't need to tell him where he was going. He knew, and Ressler and Samar would make sure that he got there.

His boot was on the first step when Raymond Reddington started out, fitting his fedora on his head and blinking into the light as he did so. His gaze fell on Jacob and the younger man shook his head, a small smirk playing on his lips. "Guess you delivered another one."

"The biggest one, I dare say," Reddington answered as he made his way down the steps. "Belov will be put away in a deep, dark hole and Elizabeth will have the life that she wants."

"I'm putting that in the win category," Jacob chuckled, watching him for any small signs and receiving none. "And you?"

"And me what?"

"If he was number one on your blacklist, where does that leave you with the bureau?"

"Are you asking me if you're finally rid of me, Agent Phelps?"

Jacob snorted. "I'll never be rid of you, Reddington. We're family now. My guess is that you'll be over drinking my scotch and telling your stories by the end of the week."

His father-in-law chuckled, but paused as he reached the bottom step and found a hand extended. Jacob waited, still watching, and Reddington tilted his head just a little before taking it. "Family," he murmured softly, as if he were tasting the word and didn't find it too bitter. "I suppose we are." He started past him, and as he spoke he gave a short wave over his shoulder, not bothering to turn back around. "And don't think you're rid of me at the Post Office either, Agent Phelps. Belov may have been Number One, but as long as Elizabeth is there, the deal stands."

A short laugh escaped him as Jacob ran his hand through his dark hair, standing it on end. He watched the other man saunter off for a moment before turning and continuing back up the stairs. He found Liz sitting in the private jet, no one else in sight, and staring blankly ahead of her. "Babe, you okay?"

She blinked hard, coming out of her thoughts, and looked over at him. "Hey, sorry."

"You okay?" he repeated, moving towards her and taking a seat.

Liz immediately leaned in, her shoulder bumping his arm and her head leaned against his shoulder. He shifted, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close. They sat there in silence for a long moment before her voice drifted up. "It's over. It's actually over."

"Yeah."

"And we made it."

A smile tilted his lips and he turned, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Yeah we did."

"Now what?"

"Now…. we go back to the office, we get buried under piles of paperwork that neither of us want to do, and then we take our daughter home. Somewhere along the way we may need to clean up the chaos that is our house after people tried to kill you."

"Actually, Red said he was sending people to do that."

"Of course he is."

She laughed and Jacob found her fingers working their way through his, lacing together and holding tight. "This is going to be okay, right? You and me and-"

"We're family," Jacob said firmly. "Reddington and I have made our peace. For you."

"Thank you."

"I love you."

"Love you too."

"I'm not saying that we're going to have one big family meal anytime soon though…"

The tease wasn't lost on her and Jacob barely had time to pull back before his wife huffed and took a playful swing at him. A grin split and he leaned forward before she could land another one, his fingers ghosting along the side of her face before pulling her into a kiss. She leaned in without any hesitation and he felt the hand still locked with his tighten its grip. They would be okay.

* * *

**Epilogue**

There were worse things than a sunny day out in the park. Things such as piles of paperwork, a case file that never ended, and the next blacklister on Raymond Reddington's never-ending list, but today that didn't matter. Today there were no blacklisters, no dangers, and no piles and piles of paperwork that they could drown in. There was sunlight and birds singing, there was a cool breeze that eased the signs of what looked to be a very warm summer their way, and there was the sound of a little girl giggling as she ran up ahead of them, her hair braided in pigtails and a pink and white dress that she just wouldn't be talked out of, even if it would be covered in grass stains by the end of the day.

"Hey you, what did your mom say about running off ahead of us?" Jacob called after Hope and she stopped in her tracks, white sandals already covered in dirt from the little path they'd been walking down.

She turned around, her little fists balled up and placed firmly on either hip, her nose scrunched, and she huffed loudly in every sign of a brewing temper tantrum. Liz glanced at her husband out of the corner of her eye. "Thanks for making me the bad guy, babe," she teased.

"You're too _slow_ , Daddy!" Hope told him and then her brown eyes - one of the few hints that she wasn't biologically theirs - shifted over to her mother. "You both are!"

"Oh yeah?" Jacob asked, his expression splitting into a grin as he dropped the large container of food that he'd been carrying on the grass. Hope let out a loud, giggling squeal as he lunged forward, scooping her up and swinging her around. She held on tight as they spun, pulling an open laugh from Liz as she watched two of the people she loved most in the world play, and finally Jacob lifted their little girl up and set her on his shoulders. "Too slow, huh? What does that make you?" he asked as he looked up.

Hope leaned over so that she could look her father in the eye. "You're silly," she told him, her voice entirely serious even if she couldn't quite keep the smile from her face. Something caught her attention up ahead and she pounded her small hand on the top of Jacob's head. "I see them! I see them!"

"Ow," he grumbled and Liz was grinning at them by this point.

"Come here, cutie," she said and reached up. Hope let herself fall back off of her dad's shoulders and her mother caught her, setting her back down on the soft dirt of the path they were following. She took hold of one hand. "Don't let go."

"Will you be fast?"

"I'll be fast," Liz promised her. "Can't promise the same for your daddy."

Jacob was already bending to pick up the container again, but he shifted it so that it was in his right hand, dropping his left hand to take Hope's free one on her other side. "Fast as you two."

Hope grinned and started forward, pulling them both along with more strength than a five-year-old had right to have. She tugged and pulled all the way, and by the time that they reached the break in the trees both Liz and Jacob were shaking with laughter at the effort she was putting into it, all the while holding onto their hands like she was glued there.

As soon as they hit the clearing and saw Elliott clearly she broke free and her parents let her. The little girl darted forward so fast that she nearly knocked her best friend over in their very sudden game of tag that never seemed to have a real end. It just picked up again whenever they saw each other next.

"Hey!" Audrey called, waving from where she was seated on the blanket already sprawled out across the grass in the park's opening, a glass of wine already in her hand.

"You guys were taking too long," Ressler said as the Phelps' walked closer and he flashed a grin. "Traffic?"

"Huds peed on the floor again," Jacob answered, dropping the food next to the blanket and crouching down next to it.

Audrey winced. "Oh, is that why he's not here? Elliott was looking forward to seeing him."

"That and the fact that he ate Princess Fluffy yesterday… we didn't think it'd be good to encourage that with a day at the park," Liz said with forced laugh.

"How's Hope taking that one?" the other woman asked, her smile already saying that she knew what was coming.

She handed Liz a glass of wine that she took gratefully. "With a vengeance."

"See, that's why we don't have a dog," Ressler said gruffly.

Jacob snorted. "The second your kid asks you for one, you'll cave."

"Don't give him ideas, Jake. Don't you do enough already? He's still asking when he can go out to the shooting range with you."

Jacob shot him an innocent look. "Hey, even _I_ know that six is too young, alright?"

"Don't let Don fool you. He's just upset that he's not asking _him_ ," Audrey pipped in.

Ressler leaned over to look inside the chest that Jacob was rummaging through. "Bring the whole damn kitchen?" he asked and yelped when Audrey popped him for the remark.

"You know, you could have cooked. No one's stopping you from figuring it out."

"She is," Ressler answered, nodding over towards his wife.

The banter continued on between them, Ressler popping off about this and Jacob teasing him about that, with Audrey on the side to help give her husband a little bit of hell. Liz had a grin on her face that wouldn't stop. They needed this. It wasn't quite the vacation they'd threatened Cooper with, but it was something. The cell phones were on silent and both shoved into her bag so that they couldn't even see them if the office called, and their children were… Okay that might need to stop.

"Hey! Hope. No ma'am," she called with an expression of disbelief at her daughter as the little girl shot her a look that was far too innocent after managing to wrestle her best friend to the ground.

"I won!" she announced.

"And that dress is going in the trash when we get home," Jacob muttered and started pulling food out of the container.

"How'd dinner go last night?" Ressler asked, his expression weary as he waited for the answer.

"It wasn't _horrible_ ," Liz answered a little hesitantly.

Jacob snorted. "By _not horrible_ she means no one died. Bruce made the mistake-"

"He really should know better after the last three times," Liz cut in.

"- of asking what Red and Katarina had been up to, and between the two of them and a _lot_ of red wine I think they may have fessed up to at least three felonies."

Ressler barked a laugh. "Seriously? He's usually better about that."

"I think he does it on purpose."

"That still has to be better than last Christmas, though," Audrey muttered,

Jacob paled. "Oh hell."

"Okay," Liz murmured with, feeling a little guilty, "he was going for a reaction on that one, but to be fair he actually gave you a gift that year."

Her husband nodded. "Yeah, I still am a little nervous to take that gun the shooting range."

"No telling how many murders it'll pop up in," Ressler agreed.

"Nah. He'd be more careful than that."

"Unless he was trying to frame you."

Because it wasn't a Ressler-Phelps get together until _that_ came up. "Technically he wasn't framing Jacob on that one," Liz defended.

Jacob looked offended. "I was under cover!"

"Still broke the law," Ressler grumbled.

"Mama, Hope's not playing fair."

The four adults turned to find a ginger little boy standing with big blue eyes and dirt all over his face, Hope just a few yards away with her arms crossed and looking victorious. Jacob choked on his wine and his partner shot him a glare. "Shut up, Jake."

"Hope, why don't you come over and have lunch?" Liz called, diffusing the situation.

"Brownies?"

"Lunch first."

She pouted a little and went to go take a seat in her dad's lap, leaning back into him so far that she was looking up at him. "I won," she told him in a stage whisper.

"Good girl," he returned in the same tone.

Liz rolled her eyes, but not even her training could help her keep the smile from her face. She was at peace. Things were still crazy, they were still getting shot at while on the job, but somewhere amidst all the chaos the had found a little slice of normal. It wasn't everyone else's normal, but it was theirs. It was the kind that she and Jacob could wrap their minds around, and it made them happy. It was the kind that Hope had brought with her and that they gave to each other. It was the kind that left her with an understanding that, even though she never could have seen it years before, taking that one job for Berlin all those years ago had changed everything. It had given her a life when she hadn't even known that she didn't have one. Falling in love with Jacob Phelps - a man that was only supposed to be a mark and nothing more - had reminded her what it meant to be loved unconditionally and without pause, and it had broken away walls that the years of her life had built around those emotions. They weren't perfect. They weren't even close, but they were happy. They fought and they cried, they lived and they loved, and they found depth in life that they never would have found apart from each other. They fit, somehow, and by fitting together they had made a space for Hope to live the life that they hadn't known at her age. They had found family in each other.

"Love you, Mommy." Liz startled out of her thoughts and found her little girl standing next to her, dirtied dress and hair sticking out of her braids in all directions. She leaned forward though and planted a very purposeful kiss on Liz's cheek.

"Love you too, sweetie," her mother managed before Hope toddled over to sit next to Elliott and eat their sandwiches together.

"You okay?" her husband's voice drifted into her ear, and she found that he'd scooted closer to her.

"Better than."

The smile he gave her was real. "Happy?"

She matched his expression, reaching forward to grab hold of him by the front of his shirt and pull him closer, her lips pressed against his. They lingered there just a moment before parting, their foreheads leaned in together. "Yes. It's everything that I didn't know I could want."

Jacob chuckled and kissed her again, both of them ignoring the way that Hope and Elliott were giggling in the background. They were happy, and while life wasn't perfect, it was better than she could have ever dreamed.

* * *

 

End.

Notes: I meant to save this until tomorrow so that it would go up on a Thursday, but I decided that it could go up tonight. If I thought finishing the writing process was strangely emotional, I'm feeling it even more with posting this last chapter. This story has been so much fun and I've learned so much through writing it. You guys have been amazing readers and have made me smile so much with your reviews. I'd love to hear from you and what you thought on whole, even if you've never reviewed before. I'll do my best to get back to everyone who logs in to leave something for this last chapter. 

In general, I try to write three chapters ahead when working on a story, and I hit the three chapter mark on the hiatus fic I've mentioned a couple of times here, so I plan to start posting it tomorrow. If you're interested, keep an eye out for _Deep in the Grey_ , which finds Liz and Tom risking everything to track Kirk down after they escape because he has Agnes. I hope you guys will enjoy it!

Much love to you all.

TS


End file.
